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Pluggers, 6/10/14

Hey, remember when pluggers thought that the best way to win a lady’s heart was to take her to get samples at Costco? Well, since then they’ve figured out that ladies are already at Costco, giving out samples, so why even bother bringing a whole different lady there? Why not just cut out the middlewoman? The sample ladies can meet all a he-plugger’s needs, if you know what I mean! (A he-plugger’s needs are primarily made up of bite-sized bits of meat and cheese on toothpicks.)

Mary Worth, 6/10/14

AHH AHH AHH THE CHILD HAS SUMMONED UP ROSE-DEMONS! UNCLEAN UNCLEAN UNCLEAN! BURN ALL THE FLOWER BUSHES AND FILL THE SWIMMING POOL WITH HOLY WATER