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Let’s hope this week’s top comment helps make room in your stomach for extra turkey:

This is NOT the way Gunther’s mother wanted him to find out about the new butler.” –Everything is Better With Monkeys

These runners up also deserve to be drowned in gravy!

“Some news: Lockhorns ripoff comic that somehow came first The Better Half is ending at the end of November. Newspapers are already asking their readers to pick if it should be replaced by The Lockhorns or just a general sense of the death of all things.” –Chip Whittle

“As Edna convulses in her final death spasm in panel five, June, after just assuring her that everything will be fine, thinks ‘Oh well, she’s not my problem anymore. Hey, there’s another woman sitting on the floor. Why does everything always have to happen to me?!'” –Shran

‘I’ll see you at the hospital later,’ June says to the woman’s abdomen. As she slips the EMTs their fees she thinks, I hope they remembered to put ice in the cooler this time.” –Cthulhu Gnu

“I dunno what physical symptoms would be appropriately cartoonish markers to express such a specific feeling as ‘lack of resolve to commit a brutal act’, but I’m pretty sure ‘leg convulsions’ and ‘expression of abject terror’ aren’t two that are working for B.C. today. Learn from the soap strips, B.C.! The only way to convey an emotion is with exaggerated, robotic hand movements, like you’re a mannequin signaling a plane!” –Jack Loves Comics

Happy 50th, Wizard of Id. That means it’s time for your colonoscopy! Or as you might call it, ‘going to the dungeon.'” –WeatherServo9

“Someday PJ will understand that there is no upside to the Wizard of Id. It’s all downside.” –KEithOK

“With all the changes in this strip, I’m glad Mark still talks like he carves his words into a stump before saying them.” –Uncle Lumpy

“Why is everything to Cherry’s left in black and white? Is Mark so distracted by her bikini that he didn’t notice that he’s headed straight for the negative zone?” –Vardulon

“Gunther’s Mom is embarrassed to be caught with the worst-selling Real Doll ever, model KY-69, the Portly Gent.” –Voshkod

“While the thought that the conversation between Hanna Dingdon and Generic Old Widower might be rife with sexual innuendo is stomach-turning, it is far preferable to reaching the conclusion that they have now spent the past week simply talking about taking a walk with no overtones at all.” –But What Do I Know

“Tech people, help me out here: Can you ‘Carrie’ people via Skype?” –Chyron HR

“Mary’s honey trap worked like a dream. Now it’s time for Phase 2 of Operation: HannaDrop: clearing Somerset’s 3-year waiting list by purveying lethally bad advice in the Ask Wendy column. What’s that? Wilbur’s writing Ask Wendy again? Excellent, we can go straight to Phase 3 … Pool Party!” –Voyage of the Oversnark

“What’s sad here is how the passerby just immediately acquiesces to Dennis’ demand. APATHY IS THE DEVIL’S BEST FRIEND.” –Joe Blevins

A3G’s status as a soap strip dovetails nicely with the inconsistent artwork. Panel 1: ‘The part of Margo will now be played by Pensive Peter Brady.’ Panel 2: ‘The part of Margo will now be played by Dyspeptic James Madison.’ Of course, the part of Lu Ann continues to be played by Repurposed Macy*s Mannequin No. 237.” –Sock Puppet

“The birds are well aware that Heathcliff’s elderly owner routinely spends his payday check on the biggest tab of LSD that he can afford.” –Wonkey the Monkey

“I hope Bull’s letter to the school board was truly vile, all ‘tiny penis’ this and ‘flabby vagina’ that, including dozens of photostats of his balls (done on the school’s machine!). And then after reading it, I hope they make him stay, because, what crueler punishment, right?” –handsome Harry Backstayge, idol of a million other women

“I’d have to say there is something weirdly menacing about a 7 year old boy showing an appreciation for the Allman Brothers Band.” –Brad

“Where does Heathcliff’s elderly owner go to work in enormous yellow shoes, a beret, and carrying a metal lunchbox? Clearly, Mr. Nutmeg isn’t just employed as a construction worker at the new Westfinster School of Clowning and Mime, he intends to be its first student.” –BigTed

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