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Mary Worth, 4/27/15

Mary gleefully explains love using the familiar language of commerce: “There are no guarantees, so how about a trial period? You could check out lots of free samples — and before you commit, be sure to line up all the coupons and rebates you can. Maybe you could even negotiate a discount for that bum leg. Under the circumstances, you should probably spring for the service contract. There are also some really good deals to be found when you buy in bulk — does Adam have any brothers? Check out the accessories, but don’t let anybody sell you something you don’t need — I know from my experience with Dr. Jeff that the rustproofing is a ripoff. And remember to shop around, including online. And don’t rule out barter! Say, what does Yelp have to say about this guy?”

Mark Trail, 4/27/15

OK, how much does everybody love hapless, never-to-be-married Wally Wood? Seriously, this guy couldn’t buy a hap at World of Haps Outlet Store on Presidents Day. Maybe Mark Trail will spin off The Trials of Wally Wood to compete in the coveted “misery porn” bracket now dominated by Funky Winkerbean, featuring guest appearances by Mark to get things rolling:

Mark — “The IRS called — they’re denying your writeoff for the trees.”
Wally — “What?”
Mark — “Watch out — there’s a beaver behind you!”
Wally — “OUCH!”
Mark — “Wait – is that a locust?”
Wally — “My farm — it’s ruined!”
Mark — “Say, I think you got a little rash on your neck, there.”
Wally — “AUGH!”
Mark — “Hmm … looks like rain.”
     

Mother Goose and Grimm, 4/27/15

And the comic strip makes three. Or maybe they just killed the wrong dog.

— Uncle Lumpy