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Crankshaft, 12/8/16

OK, look: I’d like to tell you that I found this Crankshaft joke about an old man with ass problems working as a mall Santa to make ends meet distasteful and unacceptable, but I’m gonna be real: my only complaint is that he doesn’t spell it “rhoid rage,” which would be both more accurate and much funnier.

Mary Worth, 12/8/16

So Mary Worth is fine with bedding a man 20 years your junior but counsels against revenge-fucking? Truly, this is solid, sensible advice for the modern age!