Folks, first off, it’s that time of month again: the time were you are required to come to my show in Los Angeles, full of jokes about the internet! Last month’s return to stage was a true banger and I am confident this month will be to. Join us on the Facebook event and also in person, won’t you?
But also: it’s time for the comment of the week.
“Blondie is going the Ace Attorney route with its names, I see. Can’t wait for the reveal that Herb Woodley has a secret lavender garden in the forest somewhere.” –Austria
And also also: it’s time for the hilarious runners up!
“Leroy was caught unaware as Loretta smacked the side of his face with the steering wheel that she had carried out of her last car crash. ‘I do the frivolous shopping jokes around here! Get off my turf and stick a lampshade on your head, motherfucker!’” –nescio
“Sarah knows that even though she’s been found innocent in a court of law, the court of nerdy fanboys needs ‘real’ proof. Hell, they’re still salty about the cancellation of Battlestar Galactica; obsessing over the Doggo Twins is just second nature.” –made of wince
“Pam asks in the vain hope that her father will say ‘I don’t remember ordering that,’ and she can finally start the commitment proceedings.” –Where’s Rocky?
“Not sure that Sam would be the type to use a word like ‘cacophonic.’ As a matter of fact, I’m not sure anybody would be the type to use a word like ‘cacophonic,’ except maybe a new Dick Tracy villain named ‘Pedantic Pete.’” –Pozzo
“If Ian was interested in befriending anyone, he’d shave his beard. Or grow a moustache and complete it. One or the other.” –Applemask
“Date of operation minus thirty days, in military lingo, would be D-30. Thirty days until something happens in Crankshaft. Looks like this plot line is going to just speed by.” –Voshkod
“So Jeff is going off to work? And Max sits around at home all day, watching television? This strip became Dustin so slowly that I didn’t notice. Of course, that’s mainly because I don’t read either one, but still.” –seismic-2
“Huh, the adult bird is WAY smaller than the egg, which leads me to believe that egg is extremely roomy inside. What do you suppose the ‘inner bird’ has got in there? I’m picturing kind of a gym setup, but could be anything from an art gallery to a B&D dungeon. Guess we’ll never know.” –Twinkles the Elf
“Today’s Crankshaft inspires a Miss Manners letter:
Dear Miss Manners,
When deciding whether to accept an invitation to a restaurant, is it OK for me to obliquely refer to the subsequent digestive upset or can I just talk about the impending pooptuplets in graphic detail to the inviters?” –Baja Gaijin
“Humpty Dumpty, history’s first known victim of toxic positivity.” –Roto13
“The erotic tension is building. Notice that even the rocks in the foreground are humping vigorously.” –Joe Blevins
“Say what you will about Winona Braggart, about the deli trays or the stunningly similar appearance of Blondie and her co-worker whose name I can’t be bothered to look up right now. I just appreciate their dedication to the goth-maid-lolita aesthetic. Not crazy about the lack of hairnets, though.” –pastordan
“This could be the nosy and suspicious, ‘I see you! And I think you’re up to some shenanigans! Shenanigans, I say!’ Or it could be the wise and accepting, ‘I see you! My fellow human being, my sister, I see you and acknowledge your existence on this Earth!’ Or it could be the I See You game: ‘Ooh, there’s some people sitting on the grass! I see you! Ooh, there’s a train! I see you!’ Like I Spy without the guessing part, or Peek-a-Boo without the hiding part. I hope it’s that one.” –Anonymous
“I know that it’s often necessary for characters in a single-panel comic to state the obvious to helpfully point the reader towards the joke, but I love the idea that Jeffy hasn’t learned to identify liquids by color, odor, or by observing where they just came from. ‘Water?’ his face seems to say, ‘The one without the tingly or the tongue-happiness?’” –pugfuggly
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