FOLKS! This month’s Internet Read Aloud is happening tonight, in the city of Los Angeles, California! Got a fun lineup and the price literally cannot be beat (unless someone is paying you to go to their comedy show, and which seems like madness).
Here is the link to the Facebook event! Please come if you are able, I promise you’ll have a good time!
To tide you over, laff-wise, here is this week’s comment of the week!
“Just look at those kids. They’re thinking ‘Outside? What’s that?’” –Lord Flatulence
And here are the very funny runners up!
“Don’t worry, Trixie! Thanks to the miracle of modern science, this food is so utterly processed and packed with preservatives that the ants wouldn’t touch it, anyway! WE’RE FIXING ALL OF GOD’S MISTAKES! ISN’T IT WONDERFUL??” –Dunkelcopter
“For a brief shining moment I thought the last panel might be a written apology.” –Artist formerly known as Ben
“I’m still stuck on how to complete the sentence ‘When Wilbur and Dawn eat together…’ Best I’ve got so far is ‘no one goes away hungry — except emotionally.’” –Peanut Gallery
“C’mon, Sarge, let the soldiers go inside! They’ve finished their raking task so effectively that the ground has been cleared of all objects, natural or man-made! Any more and they’ll be raking down to the sub-atomic level!” –Thelonious_Nick
“The Mary Worth Universe feels much more alive and real if we know that even when Wilbur is off-panel he keeps fucking everything up.” –Ettorre
“Dad, I’m just gonna stop you right there. When I say ‘How are things with you, Dad?’, I mean, ‘How’s work?’ or ‘Done any good karaoke lately?’ I do not — and I mean this sincerely — want to hear anything, anything at all, about your love life. Anything. In fact, I don’t want to hear about you at all. Or look at you. Listen, I’m just gonna keep talking about myself as I spoon broccoli into my mouth, ‘kay? Great.” –els
“‘Have you heard from Sam?’ ‘No. I think we both need a little space right now. That’s why I bought another 1,300 acres. Is the real estate lawyer here?’” –pastordan
“Ah, Dawn, if nothing else is redeeming about you, your shade game is strong: ‘Well, of course, Stella wants a break from you … but my situation is totally different. I’m me! I didn’t expect anyone would want to get away from me!’” –Dread
“Blondie editors cropped out a message urging fans to make and post pics of their own special Dagwood pancakes after being unable to find a satisfactory hashtags (rejecting #dagjacks and a portmanteau of Bumstead and pancakes, #bumcakes, which was too prone to autocorrect).” –Frissen Frassen Russen Mussen
“The lying didn’t come BEFORE the eyeing, the lying was a defense mechanism brought on by the decrying of the eyeing. If Jared hadn’t been publicly mortifying about the eyeing, there’d have been no need for lying. And don’t even get me started on the spying.” –MKay
“It looks like Wilbur is laser focused on drinking out of that cup. Dawn does not appear confident he will succeed.” –Kevin On Earth
“‘Oh, you think the names Jack and Jill are inherently funny, do you? What’s your name, sir?’ ‘Funky Winkerbean.’ ‘Get out.’” –Banana Jr. 6000
“Doesn’t the annuity/long-term care salesman usually spring for a meal at a swanky bistro to draw suckers, ahem, potential clients into the presentation? [slaps forehead] But of course — this is Westview and the only available venue would have been Montoni’s. Carry on, Glengarry Man!” –But What Do I Know?
“In Wilbur’s memory, his past partners look at him with an expression that is best described as ‘grudging tolerance,’ and that yet it’s still clear that’s a step or twelve above how they actually viewed him.” –Conynaut
“Gotta love the little ‘service entry’ translation at the bottom of the third panel. As if the reader is supposed to think, ‘Oh, wow! They have service entries on the moon! They’re so like us in so many ways!’” –Joe Blevins
“The extent to which Zak, without even trying, left an open wound of emasculation across Wilbur’s psyche that will never begin to heal is why Zak is the best Mary Worth character, even when off-camera for years at a time. I hope this plot ends with him looking up the pay of the average tech CEO and the average local advice columnist and realizing how optimistic ‘twice my salary’ was.” –Dan
“What I’m saying Dawn is that if you were a hot lady, you could get a guy, maybe even one with money.” –Little Blue Bicycle
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