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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 3/20/24

OK, look, I guess I get that there’s decades of aesthetic history built into Barney Google and Snuffy Smith and if you’re drawing it you feel like you have to respect tradition and depict Sparkplug and [sigh] Sparkplug’s Grandson Li’l Sparky as having feet that essentially look like potatoes. But these are animal characters that can also think and talk and make terrible, terrible wordplay, so if you’re introducing a new one, like [even heavier sigh] Spark Pug, it’s OK to draw him with hands, or hand-like paws. It’s fine! Nobody would really notice! What they will notice, on the other hand, is an autograph book and pencil that nobody in the panel could conceivably carry or use, just kind of propped up on nothing. Trust me, they’ll notice that, and they won’t care for it.

Mary Worth, 3/20/24

Yes, it’s true, you read about crazy events happening in the news, and realize that terrible things happen to people! But sometimes all it takes is a long walk in a carefully manicured garden with high admission prices in an idyllic setting in an expensive community to make you realize that it’ll all work out and that nothing bad will happen to you.