Archive: Barney Google & Snuffy Smith

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Hi and Lois, 4/27/17

“We had yell-phones. ‘Hey, Dot!’ That’s how we’d yell. And if someone lived outside of yelling distance, well, they weren’t our friends! How could you be friends with someone outside your village? There would be no way to know what clan they were a part of, to know the ties between your ancestors and theirs that defined your status relations! If you encountered any such person outside the palisade, violence was the immediate result! You couldn’t know if they were friend or foe so it was kill or be killed on sight. I have the blood of so many strangers on my hands! What were we talking about? Oh, right, phones, we didn’t have those.”

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/27/17

I know that Snuffy Smith is a notorious chicken thief — the syndicate apparently considers this more acceptable to joke about in the daily comics than his other traditional livelihood, moonshining — but it took me a while to realize that the joke here was that the chickens were evidence because he stole them. Maybe it’s because I’m a big fan of Roald Dahl and Alfred Hitchcock, but my immediate assumption was that Snuffy and Lukey murdered someone using a chicken as a weapon.

Spider-Man, 4/27/17

“Oh, you wrapped up the story with a couple days left to go? Well, uh, you could talk about some of the characters from the upcoming movie, I guess. Don’t bother looking up any pictures to see what the actors look like. Just work from memory! It’ll be fine!”

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Today’s Easter, the holiest day in the Christian calendar — and it’s on the same day for both Eastern and Western churches, for once. How are the comics doing with it? Not great, to be honest!

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/16/17

Never would’ve picked Snuffy Smith as being in the pocket of a big anti-clerical cabal, but here it is, spending its Easter Sunday strip depicting the town’s only clergyman just going from house to house shaking down the impoverished residents for whatever sums they can muster.

Dennis the Menace, 4/16/17

Though I suppose it’s better than today’s Dennis the Menace, in which he sneers that the celebration of Christ’s resurrection is far inferior to the holiday dedicated to his Dark Lord Satan.

Pluggers, 4/16/17

You’d think pluggers, following the traditions of the American heartland, would be in church, wouldn’t you? But no, here’s featured plugger Andy Bear, spending the afternoon coveting the 21st century version of his neighbor’s ass.

Shoe, 4/16/17

And, uh, Shoe is about how if you take the wrong drug cocktail you’ll shit yourself while you sleep? This isn’t related to Easter much, except in the sense that this strip’s very existence firmly disproves the existence of a loving God.

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Judge Parker, 4/15/17

So Sam and Honey Ballenger’s armed, aggrieved, kicked-off-the-police-force-for-his-various-personality-problems dad are heading over to the Buttresses kidnap compound and right into her cunning trap, I think, but I wanted to share with you today’s high comedy: Officer Ballenger (Involuntarily Ret.) bashes in a window with his rifle butt, reaches through the broken glass to try to open the door, gets an owie, fails to open the door, withdraws his arm (presumably causing more owies) then starts yelling and trying to kick in a door that, from the look of it, opens outward. Good revenge skulking, guys! A+++!

Mary Worth, 4/15/17

Hey, remember a couple of days ago, when Mary decided to take a short break from her walk and try out one of these “chairs” that are all the rage? Well, she’s now fully committed to the sitting lifestyle and has no intention of ceasing to sit any time soon! Toby might be line dancing by the pool later, and maybe the Hoosiers will see her there, but they won’t see Mary anywhere but in this chair, where she’s going to be staying indefinitely. Remember how there was vague talk of going to see how they make the folded towel animals? Well, fuck that. Chair.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/15/17

In honor of the risen Christ, Snuffy has briefly stopped robbing his neighbors and started … robbing stores, I guess.