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Mary Worth, 7/9/24

OK, here’s the thing: we know really next to nothing about Dawn’s mother, and I admit that I’ve been projecting a lot onto the image of the icy WASP queen in Wilbur’s mind. Basically, I assumed that she was, yes, an icy New Englander, but also a more or less normal person, and honestly it’s kind of surprising that I’ve only now started to wonder if maybe she’s not? Like, let’s be real, this is a woman who let Wilbur [AUTHOR’S NOTE: I CAME UP WITH THREE DIFFERENT INCREASINGLY CRASS EUPHEMISMS FOR “HAVING UNPROTECTED AND ULTIMATELY PROCREATIVE SEX WITH” HERE AND DECIDED NOT TO ACTUALLY RUN WITH ANY OF THEM, YOU’RE WELCOME] her, and anyone who makes that kind of decision can’t be OK, mentally or spiritually. So maybe it shouldn’t be a surprise that she had compiled a quick list of “Ways to bond with Dawn” that went like “1. Do shopping, like in Sex in the City, 2. Go to ballet, 3. Eat at fancy places [research on], 4. Discuss various issues of interest to college students [research on TikTok],” and when none of that took, just texted her the PDF of a plane ticket home from the next room and trusted her to do the right thing.

Six Chix, 7/9/24

So it’s been a little bit since I checked in with Six Chix, but, you know what? If a syndicated newspaper comic does a strip where you see someone dry-humping a giant sandwich, that’s absolutely going to make it onto my blog. If there’s anything you should know about joshreads dot com, the Comics Curmudgeon, it’s that. In a perfect world it would’ve been Blondie, but they long ago lost their joie de vivre, so kudos to Six Chix for stepping up to the plate.