Norse interlude
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Judge Parker, 7/9/25
Oh, I guess I forgot to mention that the cushy jobs Sophie and Reena got managing Sophie’s boyfriend’s family’s charitable foundation are in rural Norway for some reason, and also forgot to mention that April got a mysterious call from her spy-world frenemies asking her for one last meeting and then she’ll be done with spy stuff forever, they swear, and today we learn that meeting is also taking place in rural Norway, for some reason. Mostly I think it’s funny that April is all tough and prickly about being a badass spy and keeping herself safe from this guy but 100% does not seem to notice that Sophie is standing maybe 10 feet away from her and talking about her in a normal tone of voice? Anyway, the strip colorist is trying to add some visual interest by giving April’s interlocutor a goatee, and I appreciate their efforts.
Family Circus, 7/9/25
“You’re allowed to be whimsical and silly because our mother signed off on it” is one of the saddest punchlines I’ve ever seen in this comic, and since this comic is the Family Circus, that’s really saying something.
Crankshaft, 7/9/25
I guess Pam is gingerly trying to figure out if her dad has dementia? Not sure anyone would sign off on this diagnostic technique, but I understand the impulse.
72 replies to “Norse interlude”
JP:
“Listen, Ms. Parker. Outside is great here in Norway. As we like to say here in Norway, ‘Think fjord first!’ “
CS – Pun = square peg. Setup = round hole.
FC: “And you can draw as many tits on them as you want, just to prove it’s a girl. Now to draw a bull. This oughta be good!”
Crankshaft:
“I think he’s associated with a porcine pitchman for laundry detergent who says ‘That’s “All,” folks!’ “
FC: Dolly has only allowed herself to go wild AFTER coloring perfectly in the lines and making sure the cow’s udder has the accurate number of teats.
MW: Does Toby mean Ozzie and Sharon? Because I’d follow that for sure!
DtM: The Mitchells have traded Dennis for some landscaping.
GT: I initially thought they were doing a Frankenstein tribute.
JP- as someone who never read soap opera comics as a kid, I just want to know if this strip ever actually practices law.?
Or is it Judge Parker in the same way as Judge Reinhold?
That’s *quickly drawing a Mel Blanc* to you.
FC:
“Mom says any of us can write as many of these as we want, ’cause our whole family is total zeroes!”
CS: “Ah say, Ah say, the face is FAHMILIAH but Ah caint remembah the name!”
Crankshaft: I’m glad Crank didn’t recognise the figure, because I hate to think how he’d malaprop “Yosemite”.
JP: Our Trondheim kidnapper is enjoying a delicious eggelikørskål, a traditional Norwegian bowl of warm eggnog. You don’t use a spoon, of course. Just ram your face straight in and lick it off your chin.
JP:
“I had hoped we could meet in Helsinki instead, but I couldn’t get my plans over the Finnish line!”
Crankshaft: Yeah, but consider Ed’s taste. Show him a Herman & Katnip and the synapses will fire perfectly.
Lockhorns: Having given up the struggle to improve their lives in any manner whatsoever, Leroy and Loretta are going to watch it anyway.
H&L:”This little piggy went to market…”
“What’d he get?”
“About 40 cents per pou— Uh, milk and cookies!”
Beetle Bailey: The “intimate” part is where the freckles are. Miss Blips will have to get Miss Buxley drunk to find out.
MW: “Ozzie and Harriet Nelson?” was right there.
Dustin is unemployed, and can buy a lot of peace, love, and tolerance with just a fraction of $10B. And also some suitable companionship.
Blondie: When my doctor says my blood sugar is too normal, I’m going for one of Blondie’s 20-ounce cupcakes with a half-pound of frosting on it. It’s only one serving!
BG&SS are doing everything they can to piss off their real life readers. Way to fight that stereotype!
MW: So, when did Mary bust through the walls of her ground-floor condo to add sliding glass doors to a private patio? Next thing you know, she’s going to add a hot tub.
‘And, in lighter news, the comic strip Crankshaft has ceased publication after being sued into a smoking crater by Warner Bros. Discovery Inc.’
Crankshaft:
“Oh, I know that character. That’s Yellowstone Bob.”
DtM: Five minutes earlier; “Dad, what’s a rickshaw?”
Crankshaft : is watching the Looney Tunes short Hare Trigger, which featured a Wanted poster with the character’s name on it, had a bit where the outlaw introduced himself to Bugs Bunny, and earlier during the short Pam went “Look, dad, it’s Yosemite Sam!”
And he still can’t name the character.
…They should have picked a more obscure Looney Tunes character, like the Shropshire Slasher, or that Yeti who’s a parody of Lenny from Of Mice and Men, or the Opera Singer guy Bugs Bunny makes explode by holding a note for too long.
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Family Circus : “Yeah, but Dolly, if you have the “oooooo” go off the page like that without an exaggeration(*) mark, the cow holds on to the sound FOREVER, and then she’ll explode, just like that Opera Singer Guy in that Bugs Bunny cartoon!”
*That’s how the melonheads would malaprop “exclamation”, I think.
************
Frazz : alternate panel two/punchline “Don’t worry Frazz. I would never insult your stupid worldview TO YOUR FACE. I do it behind your back with Caufield, just like we do to him, and like the two of you do to me.”
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Hagar the Horrible : you know, for a Curmudgeon post titled “Norse Interlude”, it’s weird he was omitted! And it was “Hagar thinks that getting to hear all your neighbors most unspeakable sins is a pretty sweet deal (presumably because he thinks the sins are awesome, cool stories to hear)”, too!
B. Bailey: (Confused geriatric editors gather around a table to discuss today’s strip) Because when you say digital photos can be examined as taken, you mean hard copies like a Polaroid, right?
Mw: is there nobody in the Worthverse who doesn’t particularly like muffins? I don’t particularly like muffins. Am I the only one?
@Charterstoned: I think your may be confusing Sam with Foghorn Leghorn.
MW: The Osbournes live in Buckinghamshire, England. Before that, they lived in Los Angeles for over two decades.
Toby’s drunk, as usual.
@Professor Well Actually: Cupcakes are just muffins with frosting, which automatically makes them superior.
@Bob Tice: “I wanted to have the meeting in Moscow but you kept rushin’ me”
Central-Bureaucracy-1.0-Technical-Correction: Sophie and Reena’s jobs are in urban Norway, but their housing is in a small town for reasons of tax-deductible research trips.
@Allangary: That’s it, put @Charterstoned on the dementia list.
Among the many other reasons why this is a terrible way to test if an elder figure has dementia, if said elder figure has a propensity for making terrible puns in horribly inappropriate situations, and there’s a terrible pun sitting there that requires the answer to be “no”, it’s impossible to tell if they actually can’t remember or if they were just setting up the pun, especially if it makes absolutely no sense for them to be able to make the pun if their faculties aren’t at least somewhat intact.
@Bob Tice: Okay, this one was actually funny, probably because it’s mean.
@Anonymous: Today’s Hagar is even kinda relevant to today’s Judge Parker if you squint!
Well, about The Osbournes, there was a Disney cartoon some time ago, “The 7D” where Kelly Osbourne played one of the villains, she was great in that role.
Although I do love a good Ozzy Osbourne parody, personally.
“History Bites” did a parody of Pope Rodrigo Borgia. Focusing on the controversy of him and his family, they did it in the style of The Osbourne’s reality show called “The Osborgia’s”
The guy playing Borgia was literally just an Ozzy Osbourne lookalike wearing a Pope Hat. That alone was hilarious.
MW: While I do applaud the Moy/Brigman team for coming up with a family that was extremely recently in the cultural zeitgeist (what with the Black Sabbath farewell concert over the weekend) the Osbournes STILL come off as a really dated reference. And an extremely bizarre one as well…
Though to Toby’s credit, Mary did say you’d never guess, so…
FC-Well Mommy would know a lot about mooing.
MW-“Hey, everybody! Guess who’s going to be out of town,” Tobi gleefully announces.
Crankshaft: Ed Crankshaft is an at-least-100-year-old male presenting with symptoms of dementia. He is oriented to self, time, place and situation but forgetful to Loony Tunes characters. His history of malapropisms suggest an underlying brain disorder, while his sadistic tendencies with family, friends and local mailboxes may indicate a personality disorder. Given Mr. Crankshaft’s advanced age, his diminished mental capacity and the nature of his creator Tom Batiuk, this writer recommends discharge with education around taking Mr. Crankfast out back and shooting him. I am not hopeful, however, that his misery or ours will end soon.
Pluggers: Pluggers often look ashamed to be in their strips, like their amateur comedian grandchild is forcing them to make a TikTok. “Okay, grandpa, hold up your ‘erectile disfunction and explosive diarrhea’ bracelet, make sure they can also see your shitty 1982 watch, and look at the camera. Action!”
Frazz yesterday: lectures about other people’s approach to life. Frazz today: “don’t lecture me about my approach to life.”
CS: At least they’re not reading comic books for a change.
Luann: Bernice, your problem is simple. You’re bored because you’re not nearly as busy as you think you are. If you were really doing “16 credits and extra course work,” plus accountancy for a business, you wouldn’t be done for the day at 10 AM.
@Dmsilev: Oh, I wish. The Funkyverse is the eBaumsWorld of newspaper comics.
CS: Puns don’t necessarily mean one has dementia but they can weed out assholes who do way too much reaching for the sake of a joke.
MW: Toby’s still trying to get used to solid food after surviving on box wine and quaaludes which is why she’s holding her uneaten muffin like a rock.
@Morgan Wick: For the (informal) dementia test to really work, you’d have to watch Ed’s hands. If he starts saying something like, “Well, he was trying to bring the thing to the…you know…but it wouldn’t get there on time” while making vague gestures about flattening something out, well, you know as much as you ever did, which is that he’s off his nut.
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV: “As for me, I feel stupider for having read this dreck. I can no longer program my microwave, and my eyeballs have developed a nervous twitch.”
Crankshaft: No diss here, I actually think this took more effort to deliver than most CS malapropisms. I for one appreciate it.
@Allangary: It was intentional, but when you have to explain, any attempt at humor evaporates [insert gong sound here].
Family Circus – “You can put as many ‘o’s in moo as you want, so long as you remember our small sect of a church upholds the agrarian tradition of teaching kids at a young age the need to slaughter animals personally. That includes childhood drawings of animals.”
Crankshaft – The condition of Witzelsucht, pathological joke telling, can be a sign of early dementia. Luckily, no one has to feel bad for laughing at a sufferer of dementia because no one laughs at Ed Crankshaft’s jokes.
@Banana Jr. 6000:
Luann: Bernice, your problem is simple. You’re bored because you’re not nearly as busy as you think you are. If you were really doing “16 credits and extra course work,” plus accountancy for a business, you wouldn’t be done for the day at 10 AM.
BUT IT’S THE SUMMER! It’s not like universities offer classes during the summer!
Also, how hard could the accounting for a restaurant be? You can probably do it from your bed, it’s not like you have to do stuff like go there in person to check the cash register or anything!
(…I hope the fact that I’m being sarcastic is coming thru, I’d REALLY hate it if anyone thought I was actually trying to give Bernice an excuse…)
BB: In the age of social media, polaroid/instax aim for a ‘capture the moment’ vibe, but still, ew…
DT: Oh great, let’s layer on more complexity to what the great-etc-uncle did rather than explain loose ends
@Professor Well Actually: No, silly. Everyone in the Worthverse likes muffins…if they know what’s good for them…..
@Anonymous: Luann : to be fair to Bernice (I know, I know…) if she’s actually completed all her courses she’d be on track to finish without taking summer session courses. She could maybe take a summer course to make her regular session load lighter (perhaps a gen Ed requirement, but it’s not likely the advanced courses for her major would be offered in the summer). But I wouldn’t be at all surprised if her scholarship did not cover that. Tuition for the regular session won’t be lower for an underload, and summer courses would be extra tuition.
Later, after a high-speed chase and gunfight over the mountains to the sea, April dispatches her attacker, forcing his car off the road and over a cliff, where it plummets in flames into deep watery valley that leads to the ocean. “Have you driven into a fjord lately?” she mutters, fulfilling her contractual killing quip.
@Banana Jr. 6000: Does Bernice even have a life outside of bullying her disabled best friend?
JP: I like how these two are talking right into their coffees, as a way of being covert, I guess? You think they’re blowing bubbles? I hope so.
CS: As a proud Quebecker (of about 8 years) I completely forgot that that last name is pronounced ‘blank’ and not ‘blawn’. Weirdly enough, the pun still works in french, as ‘avoir un blanc‘ is an expression in Quebec, although it was borrowed from english and the provincial french language office lists it as an ‘unrecommended phrase’. Anyhow, there’s no point to any of this, I just wanted to let you all in on the tiny little word adventure I just went on.
Pib: 11 months and counting.
@Philip:
Crankshaft – The condition of Witzelsucht, pathological joke telling, can be a sign of early dementia.
Well, that’s terrifying. And totally on-brand.
@Anonymous:
Hard enough that two supposedly experienced adults have to report to begging a teenager to juggle the books in her spare time, apparently. Just saying that I hope portraying Bernice’s Bern-out was worth making the Degroots look like a bunch of incompetent morons. (To be fair though, Nancy needed her dimwitted daughter and the nagging passive-aggressive stranger she recently started dating to tell her how to budget for a charity set up in her own venue, so I guess they looked like incompetent morons way before Bernice’s manufacture existential crisis.)
I think Billy’s more confused that the cow isn’t a circle with the “MOOOOO…” underneath it. What kind of format and father defying BS is Dolly trying to pull here?
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Crankshaft is flouting copyright laws for THIS?!?! I’d buy it if we saw Ol’ Cranky setting up the question and wearing the trademark Funkyverse self-satisfied smirk when he finally got to deliver the line, but the question seems to be coming out of the blue and he appears genuinely perplexed. Even Pam looks like she doesn’t know what to make of this and is considering finding a job in another comic.
@pugfuggly: If it helps, I’m American and I still thought his last name was pronounced “blahnk.”
@Banana Jr. 6000: In any case, I suspect the actual problem is that Bernice wanted to do this desperate humblebrag (“look how much I got accomplished before breakfast!”) in front of an actual person, but whoops, there’s no one to condescend to now.
FC: Billy punches Jeffy to test Dolly’s theory.
“OOOOOOOOOOOOW!”
“Hey, it works!”
C’shaft: Mel Blanc has been dead now for forty-six years. His passing is closer to the end of World War II, the founding of the United Nations, and ENIAC than it is to today. I’m not saying Tom Batiuk’s pop culture sphere is outdated, but…actually, that’s exactly what I’m saying. Watch something made this century for a change, Tom! There’s like a gazillion Marvel and DC movies out there, surely one or two of them will appeal to your Silver Age nostalgia!
JP: I’m not an expert in cloak-and-dagger shenanigans, but I would think the “grab target off the street, shove them into an unmarked van and drive off ” trick would work better in, say, a big metropolis after dark, and not in broad daylight on the main drag of a small town where it’s almost certainly going to be the most interesting thing happening at that moment.
Thel began policing her children’s artistic endeavors after Jeffy depicted his parents as having cartoonishly large butts, fearing her sweet darlings would grow up to be anarchistic graffiti artists.
JP: The way I see it, the reason that the CIA has dispatched April to the same town in Norway where Glen has assigned Sophie and Reena is that Glen and his charitable foundation that’s headquartered there are in fact April’s assassination targets, because the foundation is actually a front for an international terrorist organization that’s run by Glen and his family. Note that in the strip to which Josh posted a link Glen is telling Sophie that “There was a big management shift in the family firm after my father died.” Since Glen’s Dad was in fact murdered by another family member, this big “management shift” is just the way that terrorist organizations go about setting policy and establishing control. This new order of things has prompted the CIA to act now, before Glen can carry out his plans for attacking his intended targets, which include US Government facilities that were not targets previously. If April’s assignment to wipe out Glen’s organization means that Sophie is near the top of her hit list, all I have to say to April is, “Be thorough. The real mastermind behind the family is Neddy!”
@TheDiva: To be pedantic, thirty-six years. I would suggest using anime in that panel, except that has been around for decades as well. The best we can probably hope for from Batiuk is a Shrek reference.
FC: the only thing more depressing than Dolly’s line is the expression on Billy’s face as he listens to it. “Yeah, Mommy seems to be tolerant of non-conformity,” he is thinking, “but just wait until you get your first girlfriend and the shit hits the fan.”
S4th: never pegged ol’ Ralph to become a Zoom Etiquette advocate.
LUANN: never expected Mr. Monstro to have more empathy to than the hospital mans
CURTIS: never expected the kid, finding his task was in vain, would say “good” rather than “wtf”.
JP – Mumble in your cup so we don’t look like lovers….
FC – BtW – Billy…yer an assholeeeeee….
Crank – Tarnation….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
@TheDiva: Mel Blanc died in 1989, not 1979.
@MKay, GT: Frankenstein was the name of the sports podcaster!
@will: “Pib: 11 months and counting.”
It’s officially finished. Old strips have a paywall and there will be no new ones.
Somehow, we will have to get over it and move on.
@LTJpezcore1: Toby: “Well, I knew it had to be some form of degenerates, so I was in the ballpark at least.” (Note that specify that the parents and their perpetual rutting are not Mary’s “friends.” Only the unrelated little girl she barely knows but is intricately fascinated by, a perfectly typical, not-weird-or creepy-in-the-slightest relationship.)
@TheDiva: In french it’s closer to ‘blahn’, but with barely an ‘n’ sound, like saying ‘blond’ without the ‘d’.
It’s the same way that I cringe every time I hear the actor Friends, Matt Leblanc, pronounced it Luh-blank, even though it’s how he says it. I think part of it is that to me he looks so Québécois (though with that name his background is probably Acadian).
@Maltmash3r:
#6. JP: in case no one yet has responded, yes, Maltmash, this strip used to see much legal action inside and outside the court. Then they hired a JP writer who thinks law is boring to himself and to readers.
JP: Is it a goatee, or did Mr. Superspy get his turmeric latte all over his mouth?
@Tabby Lavalamp: Tom Batiuk does this all the time. He’s constantly sticking other people’s IP characters into his work, in ways that don’t even approach fair use. It’s shocking that he hasn’t gotten a cease and desist yet, especially considering IP law pretty much requires IP holders to be a dick about it.
Making this even worse, the borrowed IP is often the entire joke. John Darling ran on this. “Today we’re going to talk about illegal aliens…” cut to E.T., Chewbacca, and Mr. Spock waiting to be interviewed.
@seismic-2, JP: Good enough for me, and probably dead-on accurate.
DT: “Time traveling villain manipulates his own descendants, guiding them to wealth and prosperity while systematically eliminating everyone except one heir who is his exact duplicate, with the plan of replacing him as head of the empire he has constructed” is an interesting concept that has been utterly wasted here. Someone should pass it along to Christopher Nolan to see what he can make of it.
Dustin: “Ten billion dollars can buy lots of peace, love, and tolerance.”
“Explain.”
“Money can be used to correct systemic social issues which create resentment, desperation, and conflict.”
(Also, shut up, Meg. You spend half of your life saying catty mean things to your brother and the other half on your phone, where I assume you say catty mean things to random strangers. You wouldn’t know peace, love, or tolerance if they bit you on the leg.)
GT: Let’s hear it for the prom king and queen, Frankenstein’s Monster and Wolverine in drag!
Luann: At this point, Bernice would have been born in what, 2006? What were she and Luann doing at malls in the midst of the retail apocalypse? Staring at the decayed husks Waldenbooks and K.B. Toys? Getting harassed at pop-up cell phone kiosks?
MW: It’s a pretty easy guess; I mean, how many people outside of Charterstone does Mary know, anyway?
Phantom: Nice to see this is an equal opportunity human trafficking ring.
@Tonio: You’re right, my head math is terrible. Replace WWII, the UN, and ENIAC with Brown v. Board, The Fellowship of the Ring, and Elvis Presley’s first single and my point stands.
Judge Parker: “I didn’t invent the turtleneck, Lana, but I was the first to recognize its potential as a tactical garment.”
Crankshaft: Asking if Crankshaft knew the name of a certain cartoon character would make more sense if it weren’t one known for regularly announcing his own name in his angry tirades.
FC: I guess it’s a nice touch that Billy doesn’t care what mom said, he is over all of this crap. Where by “nice” I mean an unexpected touch of an internal world for the characters, just unfortunately it turns out it’s depressing. He looks like he belongs in Shoe.