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Mary Worth, 8/2/25

Not sure what’s funnier here: That Olive says it’s hard to “ignore the critics,” as if there’s a Yelp category specifically for tweens and Olive has received a series of 1- and 2-star reviews referring to her as “weird” and “subpar” and “is she psychic or what, I don’t get it, she hints at it a lot but mostly doesn’t do any cool stuff,” or that Mary urges her to “keep on shining,” as if she were vaguely aware that there’s a book and a movie about a little psychic kid called The Shining that she’s never seen but it sounds like such a pleasant and optimistic title that she assumes everything works out pretty well for him.

Hi and Lois, 8/2/25

“What this beach needs is fewer little kids coming up and talking to you,” the lifeguard thinks. “I should make a sign telling them not to do it.”

Gil Thorp, 8/2/25

Ha ha, Gil is totally sanguine about the possibility of his ex-wife taking a job as AD at his hated rival school! It’s all good! Holding a big cup of lemonade at the top in a vice grip where it looks like you’re going to crush it with your bare hand is normal and a sign that you’re just relaxing and having fun, actually!