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Beetle Bailey, 11/4/11

General Halftrack’s mind long ago turned to mush, with garden-variety senile dementia being speeded along by copious amounts of liquor. Still, he has moments of awful lucidity, as in today’s panel one, when he realizes that one of his soldiers is generally accompanied by an anthropomorphic dog. “Seriously, why does he walk on his hind legs? And wear a uniform? Is he actually in the Army? What sort of insane world have I been living in all these years?” Then, mercifully, the veil of madness quickly falls over his existence again. “What if I walked on all fours, like a dog? Ha ha, funny!”

Gasoline Alley, 11/4/11

Oh, look, Slim’s cousin, a character whose major distinguishing characteristic is that he tells appallingly bad jokes nonstop, is back, gracing us with a bad joke every day, forever! I have hopes that Clovia’s “!” is short for “Wait, I just reaized, I don’t just have to sit here and listen quietly to these bad jokes! I could, for instance, ask this gentleman to leave! Or I could murder him.”