Gettin’ old and crusty
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Blondie, 10/26/24
Look, clearly I’m not as young as I was when I launched this blog back in 2004, and if I had a chance to tell that 29-year-old what what aging would be like, I would say that it really fucks with your sense of time: things that you think of as happening just the other day may, in fact, have happened literally years ago. But writing about the legacy comics definitely helps “keep you young,” not in the sense that comics are a medium for children or anything, but rather in the sense that the legacy strips are all churned out by old guys, so you get a lot of cautionary examples of how not to be a clueless old guy. For instance, no matter how novel something seems to me, I would do a little research about it before committing to print the declaration that it constitutes a “hot craze.” Did you know that Starbucks has been selling pumpkin spice lattes since 2003? That they are, in fact, even older than this blog? I’m just saying. Making wry commentary about Mary Worth may have once been a hot craze, but it is no longer, and neither, I regret to inform both Elmo and Dagwood, is pumpkin spice.
Beetle Bailey, 10/26/24
I actually really like how happy all the officers are in the first panel. It would’ve been easy, given the joke, to make them sullen or angry that their team is losing, and expressing their rage in a nonstop stream of obscenities. But they’re havng a great time! They’re exuberant swearers! That changes the whole dynamic.
Hi and Lois, 10/26/24
OK, so earlier this week I made my occasional reference to the occasional colorist mistakes that you see in the comics, but this is definitely the funniest one yet. Just imagine some unfortunate, underpaid soul, possibly working in a country where baseball is not a well known pastime, squinting at Ditto’s hat and thinking, “So … ‘Sox’? That’s short for Red Sox, right? Great, I have this one covered.”
135 replies to “Gettin’ old and crusty”
Blondie:
“My mom is heavily into pumpkin spice, Mr. B!”
“She’s out of her gourd, Elmo!”
H&L meta: Not a colorist mistake; this is a blog writer research mistake. The White Sox use red as one of their throwback team colors and you can buy multiple variations of a black cap with that red-lettered White Sox logo.
Blondie: Ha, it’s funny because fumigation isn’t for eliminating unpleasant odors, it’s for killing pests. So I think Elmo’s dad has just announced his intentions to kill his wife? Well, nice of him to allow her the rest of the pumpkin season, I guess…
BB: I know that those extra exclamation marks are just supposed to be part of the grawlix, but it really does make it look like two distinct sentences. “Ooops, I mean ‘That should shuts their mouths. Assholes!’, not the other way around…”
H&L: I like that there’s a big red button on that remote for changing what sports are on. It’s the only button Hi really uses.
MW: And by favorite ‘spot’ he means favorite parking spot. Ed is more OCD than workaholic.
Basketball in “Beetle Bailey,” baseball and football in “Hi & Lois” — I’d like to think Dagwood’s watching soccer, but it’s more likely to be competitive eating.
H&L – I’m not a baseball fan, but when your franchise are the penultimate losers for the season, it’s hard not to be aware who the ultimate losers were. But the colorist, being a colorist had to color it. Maybe it’s a symbol of how badly the White Sox had to bleed out to beat the Twins for last place?
BB: If the Flagstons live in Cleveland, Ditto is about to out-cuss the Camp Swampy officers.
BLONDIE: “Crazed overkill” better describes the fact that every year something more ludicrous gets pumpkin spiced.
B. Bailey: Part of the strip modernization involves remodeling the general’s wife after the foul-mouthed Susie Essman character from Curb Your Enthusiasm.
Marvin: Gotta agree with the kid on this one.
BB: The soldiers are swearing because they’re yelling “Fucking hell! Popeye just ran onto the basketball court and stole the damn ball!”
To be fair, this could be the first year the Blondie writing team has discovered the fall pumpkin spice tradition and they thought it was a hot new craze. Or they could have been reeling from that staggering invention since 2003 and only now gotten to writing about it. Equally possible either way.
DT: To summarize, Tracy’s city has a history, as locations that have existed for a duration of time tend to do (though it lacks anything as mundane as a name). In this city, there are buildings, and some of them are given special significance, but sometimes they get old and gross, but some people don’t like that. One building in particular was important, then it wasn’t, but now maybe it is again. …Sorry, I messed up. This wasn’t really a summary, I just paraphrased the entire week.
JP: Over the past six days, Declan was given eleven speech balloons and allowed to express something resembling a coherent thought without stammering helplessly or letting himself be interrupted in only one of them. That’s right. Declan Whelan, alleged veteran conman and master manipulator, was steamrolled by oratory prowess of Neddy freaking Spencer.
MW: Estelle and Ed’s favorite spot? Um… where? Ed’s living room? The karaoke place? The lobby of the vet clinic? That piano bar they went one time? The Marriott conference center where they met Sheila and made awkward small talk with other visiting veteranarians- yeah, that must be it. That place means so much to them, maybe. Or maybe Ed panicked at the prospect of Estelle showing up for yet another blow-up at his place of work and said the first thing he could think of to divert her anywhere else.
FC: “Actually, it’s a bag and my Mom puts it but you get the idea.”
DtM: Once again, Dennis tries to warn his dad about the dangers of speaking his mind in the presence of Alexa but to no avail.
So it turns out that, for all these years, Hi has been a Yankees fan and Ditto has been a Red Sox fan, under the same roof, and not once did it lead to a disagreement, until today? A disagreement that was resolved by Hi changing the channel? Maybe there is hope for world peace after all. Be like Hi and Ditto y’all.
JP: ‘But Neddy, this is MY house…’
Wow, Ces must have really gotten tired of this storyline in a hurry. Tomorrow we’ll probably get a denouement in the diner with the world’s fluffiest pancakes and on Monday it’ll be ‘And so….’
Luann: Yesterday I thought that was Kip who scored the winning touchdown, but I see today he has a different jersey number (17) than the player we saw yesterday (22). I was glad to clear that up, so I can focus on Tiffany’s spiking of the Idiot Ball by calling out to the boyfriend of the woman she KNOWS is insanely possessive of her ‘shoog’ (blech…) and will now keep the whole dorm building up with a night of screeching accusations.
“My Mom is heavily into pumpkin spice,* Mr. B.”
*Latest fad.
Letting your kid root for the White Sox this year was probably child abuse?
BB: it will hard for players with only three fingers to palm the ball and hoo come they’re playing in only their socks?
BB- They may be horribly deformed mutants playing basketball in their socks in a wintry white void, but that’s still better sports action than you’ll find in the new Gil Thorp.
I like how Arlo and Janis is simultaneously a strip that does actually keep up with the times, but doesn’t pretend that young people still read the comics, as in today’s strip that is cheerfully incomprehensible to anyone under 65.
CS: “I was working in the lab, late one night . . .”
……………
EERIE BEHAVIOR, PARTS 1 AND 2:
MW: Ed is leaving the office and it’s still daylight?
BB: This old battleax is serving drinks to Amos and his buddies?
Until I looked into it to figure out what was wrong with the hat, I had no idea the Red Sox, White Sox, and Black Sox weren’t just three different teams for different sports from the same city doing a cute theme thing, like how Chicago calls its teams the Bulls and the Bears. But it turns out they’re from different cities, one of those cities IS Chicago (way to mess up the pattern, guys, couldn’t you have been the Brokers or something?), and the Black Sox aren’t even real! So I have a lot of sympathy for the colorist not being up on the intricacies of hat design here.
Beetle Bailey: Five glasses for three men with that bottle.of liquor? Okay, we know the general gets two: he’s the ranking officer and a rampant alcoholic. That still leaves one for. . .? I’m gonna say, an extra for breakage.
Don Abundio, translated:
“Quoth the Raven: ‘Evermore’!
Quoth the Raven: ‘Evermore’!”
“Ugh! That dumb bird gets it wrong every time!”
“I know, but give her some credit…”
“Quoth the Raven…!”
“Not every bird is educated enough to quote Shakespeare”
@Rube: Wow. I had no idea what the joke was when I first read the strip, and your post caused it to dawn on me. Not a GREAT joke, but thanks anyway.
Blondie: Maybe Elmo should schedule an appointment with an allergist? I’m pretty sure difficulty breathing is not a normal response to cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg and clove, even in abundance.
H&L: Look, I had to Google to confirm that wasn’t the Boston Red Sox logo, so maybe give the colorist a little slack. You know they’re not being paid enough to care about this.
As Hi and Ditto decide what sport to watch, Hi instructs Ditto in the art of mutual masturbation. A bond passed down over the generations.
@Rube: …wait, I get it. (I wasn’t around for the Heidi Bowl but as a kid I assiduously read some “Twelve notorious moments in sports” book that discussed it.)
@Steph: SoOKyoudidn’taskbut the “Black Sox” was a way of referring to the scandal in which eight Chicago White Sox players were accused of throwing the World Series at the behest of gamblers and banned from baseball for life. The most famous of the banned players was “Shoeless Joe” Jackson, which led to the expression “Say it ain’t so, Joe,” and was the inspiration in different ways for the movies Eight Men Out and Field of Dreams, which… getting back to Josh’s commentary… were both from the 80s? They are 35 years old? Dang.
[oh wait, Steph! hi! I beta-tested Chlorophyll!]
C’shaft: Maybe the Pizza Monster is Tom Batiuk? (Or Batton Thomas, or whatever.) They certainly have the same taste in prose.
DT: Ah, so this has all been a lead-up to singing the praises of gentrification!
Dustin: Sorry, but you do NOT get to spend a solid week on “why do women need all those hair care products, amirte fellas?” and then turn around and pretend you care about unrealistic beauty standards. You’re not fooling anyone.
GT: So Keri has been audibly purging at home for an an indeterminate amount of time, and Gil is ignorant of it until his girlfriend brings it up? Stellar parenting there.
JP: If you’re a wedding crasher fishing for a wealthy woman to marry, why would you assume on sight that the maid of honor at a union between a screenwriter and an unknown actress would fit the bill?
HotC: “Mamma Mia? Do we look like we’re fifty years old? We’re sneaking into Deadpool vs. Wolverine for the third time.”
Lio: I mean, I understand not wanting to put in the effort of recreating H.R. Giger’s actual gravestone (look it up, it’s gorgeous) but…
Luann: My “Stef is a closeted lesbian” theory gains credence.
MT: And the rest of the class isn’t on the same plane because…?
MW: It may seem morbid, especially given Dr. Ed’s profession, but the pet cemetery is a lovely place for a walk…
RMMD: “Then we agree, this deviation from our regular routine was a positive experience. Our conjugal relationship has benefited from it. We may now go home and engage in procreative intercourse.”
@richardf8: Yeah, as a Chicagoland native, I was kind of thinking that Ditto would most likely have quit watching baseball entirely and burned his Sox paraphernalia in disgust sometime in July.
So, will Chip be upset tomorrow about missing one of the greatest games of all time, or relieved to be saved from watching his beloved team snatching defeat from the jaws of victory? Oh, um, spoiler alert for people who haven’t watched their recordings of the game yet, I guess. Anyway, since these are drawn weeks or months ahead of time normally, I guess we’ll never know.
Blondie:
“I don’t want to say that Mom is unattuned to popular culture, Mr. B, but she thinks that ‘Pumpkin’ Spice sang and danced next to Scary, Sporty, Baby, Ginger and Posh!”
MW:
“Out, damned Spot!”
“Oh, Ed! You’re such a cultured, well-read dreamboat! — there you go, quoting Macbeth!”
“No, no. I was try to shoo Mr. Huff’s beagle away from here so that you and I could have an important conversation!”
FC – Holier than thou Grandma is thinking about holding a pillow on Dolly’s face. “Be gone, Satan!”
Seriously, I can’t imagine that the old bat would take two small children to a scary movie.
Considering how the rest of the audience is dressed, maybe it’s a revival of a scary movie from the 1960s.
Rex Morgan – Yeah, it’s a really special night when you see an old geezer that you see almost every day at the local diner or in your office. Of course, this is RMMD, so even special romantic nights out are boring.
Brewster Rockit – Give peas a chance.
Crankshaft – How was Mopey Pete ever hired to write anything?
9CL – This ongoing trip down memory lane makes me wonder if Brooke is going to retire.
Hi & Lois – There should be a red “P” on his cap.
I don’t usually follow sports, but Mr. Jive and I watched their games this season, and we were both disappointed that they choked in the playoffs.
@TheDiva: Hey, if you don’t have Find-a-Grave.com in your Bookmarks bar, I don’t wanna know you.
(Giger carved his own damn tombstone? That’s hardcore Goth)
@Rube: I have zero interest in football, but I remember that incident. I curse it every time a show I want to see is delayed for an hour because the network has to show the last five minutes of the football game.
Blondie: This is totally the writer bitching about his own home life.
Beetle Bailey: Jokes like this don’t really land properly when you’re not allowed to actually swear or even be especially rude. Like, in an actually funny version of this General Halftrack’s wife would be directly telling these guys to watch their fucking mouths, but not so here.
Hi And Lois: That’s actually Hi’s old “sex” hat that he’s clumsily stitched into saying Sox because he’s too cheap to buy his son a hat for his favorite team. Such is life.
Blondie – But on the bowel movement front, everything is A-OK….
BB – What is the significance of the five glasses for four people? One for a fallen comrade? Who would that be…Dondi, maybe….
H&L – So…you didn’t bolster Ditto’s self esteem or properly and now he’s morphed into a self centered snotty little prick? Don’t beat yourself up, Hi. That’s just what Doctor Spock, Stalin and Satan wanted! HA HA….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
GT: Really not loving the new art here. Beth has gone from Bettie Page to Ernie from ‘My Three Sons.’
OK, so the H&L colorists have trouble deciding on the color for Ditto’s baseball cap. Big deal. The B&B colorists have trouble deciding on Major Greenbrass’s race.
Also in the category of SoOKyoudidn’taskbut . . .
Yes, Field of Dreams and Eight Men Out were from the 1980s although the movie Eight Men Out was based entirely on the 1963 or so book of the same name by Eliot Asinov, who I think was the brother of Isaac. The book could be called – generously – historical fiction. Unfortunately, it remains the seminal book on the subject, and a movie following the book completely just solidifies all the myths.
Probably the biggest bullshit is the attempt to make Joe Jackson look like an innocent party, which he wasn’t. It conflates his illiteracy with stupidity, which is offensive. (Ed Crankshaft himself once made the distinction that the two aren’t the same.)
Also, the Jackson apologists do some semantical gyrations with why he should be in the Hall of Fame. He was given a lifetime suspension, they say, which should have been lifted when he died in 1951. However, the reason he is not in the Hall of Fame is not because such suspendees are no longer eligible for election. The rule that you can’t be elected to the Hall if you have a lifetime suspension (not called the permanently ineligible list) didn’t happen until 1991, and it was done in anticipation of Pete Rose becoming eligible. So Jackson had been eligible for 40 years after his death (and 55 years after the first Hall of Fame election). It was just that there was little push from anyone to elect him. By the way, in case anyone is wondering, Roberto Alomar is in the Hall of Fame and is on the permanently ineligible list, but he was elected/inducted before he was suspended/ineligible.
I know that’s way more than anyone wanted, but I’m on a roll.
By the way, some sort of Yankee fandom in High & Lower has been shown before, in the November 16, 1964 one when they conflate the downfall of Nikita Kruschev and Yankees manager Yogi Berra.
H&L – It’s so heart-warming to see a father and son bonding over sports and masturbation.
MW:
“Stell? — I’ve found the ‘e’s from both ends of that ridiculous nickname of yours!”
Beetle Bailey: Forget the beer and snacks that usually accompany sports on TV — Mrs. Halftrack is apparently serving nothing but straight whisky in large tumblers. No wonder the guys are so exuberant! (And she’s so open with her potty mouth — if my math is correct, two of the glasses are for her.)
Hi and Lois: Of course, Ditto couldn’t possibly enjoy rooting for either New York or Los Angeles. “Hi and Lois — the only comic strip that dares to defy the Coastal Elites!” (Boston doesn’t count — we all know Red Sox fans are pluggers.)
Mary Worth: Stell has a lot of apologizing to do in order to get Ed back. Luckily, she knows the only real key to his heart — which is why she’s leaning her head out of the open car window like a dog.
MW:
“Let’s go to our favorite spot! — is there room in the back of your car for Sheila to tag along?”
@jroggs: H&L: You’re right.
@I speak Jive: re FC: I also have trouble figuring out what’s going on here. The setting seems to be a movie theater, and the rest of the audience, including Billy and several kids, seems to be watching intently with more dismay than horror. I have to assume it’s a religious movie that shows the results of a sinful life. HTT Grandma wouldn’t enter a movie theater otherwise. In any case, Dolly doesn’t seem to be paying any attention.
FFS, if there is ever going to be one comic character who is going to be on top of any culinary trends, it’s friggin’ Dagwood. Don’t do him dirty like this (quick Bing), Dean Young, you 86-year-old whippersnapper!
BB: I like how there are three officers, in full uniform, bunched up together in one tiny loveseat.
@jroggs: So, Ditto’s been sullenly slouching in that spot since April?
RMMD: There’s a PDA going on in panel 2! Passions inflamed by roots country music! Or else it’s a kidnapping in progress.
MW:
“Stell? — here, catch!”
“OWWWWW! — why’d you throw my engagement ring at me?”
“Turnabout is fair play!”
“I hate you.”
“I hate you, too!”
The End.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: I haven’t seen 8MO, but the Shoeless Joe defense is something I really dislike about FoD, a movie I mostly otherwise love. Jackson was arguably the biggest snake of the bunch. He took the payoff and kept the secret of the other conspirators, accepting money in exchange for the thrown series. Make no mistake, that makes him just as guilty. The fact that he personally played up to his usual ability just shows he chose to protect his own vanity while letting his teammates do the dirty work of playing poorly to lose. Absolute scumbag.
Pete Rose defenders have similar problems, even without getting into stuff like his sex crime allegations. Betting on your team to win compromises your leadership because it incentivizes you to prioritize certain games over others, causing you to do thing like using high leverage relievers or players with mild injuries that could get worse.
Ditto for the roiders of the late ’90s and early ’00s, and the members of the Astros’ trash can gang will soon be finding their own Hall of Fame entrances blocked as well. No sympathy from me; they all did this to themselves.
“But they were good at hitting baseballs!” the cretins* whine. Fuck ’em. Fair play is the foundation of professional sports; without it, there’s no reason to care about these adults running around playing games. Cheating has to have meaningful consequences, and cheaters should never be venerated.
*(Still not as bad as people who think catcher-framing is good for baseball.)
BB — The writers do know it’s football season, right, and no one is inviting his bros over to watch the NBA in October. I would expect a little more sports awareness–after all, this isn’t Gil Thorpe!
@But What Do I Know?: Haha, I would think so. The White Sox were pretty much unanimously projected to be the worst team in the league this year; the only surprise was that they turned put to be the worst team in league history. As others have mentioned, this joke would have worked much better if Ditto was wearing a Twins or Mariners cap, or maybe a team like the Orioles, Phillies, or Brewers who got eliminated early in the playoffs despite high hopes. The joke doesn’t really work at all with White Sox fans; their attitude is less “Dang it, this sucks!” and more “I’ve been dead inside for months.”
Blondie – You might get a break after pumpkin spice season ends, but once December comes around, your house will smell like peppermint mocha. There’s no escaping the hell of trendy flavors.
With all the focus on cap colors, I feel like we’re sleeping on the Hi and Lois writers knowing six months in advance that the White Sox would be eliminated from the playoffs. They sucked! No reason to put in some cagey, vague reference that could be retroactively explained away! (The same for the Yankees being in the series, though that’s more about payroll than timing.)
@jroggs: I thought White Sox fans’ attitude was “F*** the Cubs”?
@Arabella: It’s difficult to tell, but I hope that the young blonde in the pink minidress grabbed hold of a random fat guy/Plugger for parking-lot smoochies. The alternative is too awful to contemplate.
@7 MKay: on Blondie: Is “Crazed overkill” the pumpkin spice radiator flush my mechanic is offering every October?
@Arabella: #47: I thought the same thing. It’s probably one of those faith-based movies adapted from the Left Behind novels. No way would HTT Grandma take the kids to a movie with any kind of supernatural themes.
Too bad Hi missed one of the greatest endings to a WS Game EVER.
(Why or why did the Yankees put in the 10th inning with runners on base a pitcher who had not thrown in a game situation in the last 5 weeks?)
@jroggs: “But they were good at hitting baseballs!” the cretins* whine.
Hall of Famer Joe Mauer played high school ball at Cretin-Derham Hall. They are good at hitting baseballs there but they are by no means whiners.
H&L: “No one will get a red B, or a red cap with a B. ”
H&L: “Gaaahhh! Not the Patriots! Switch it back! Switch it back!”
Joe Sheehan, on his blog, asked the same thing. Boone had two other lefthanders he could have gone with.
I suppose tonight we’ll be seeing a lot of replays of Kirk Gibson’s 1988 homer. Not really the same thing, but the networks aren’t that creative. If they show the replay, note all the tail lights on the cars in the parking lot, people leaving early and missing a historic moment. I don’t know if the shot of Freeman’s homer last night shows the parking lot and of people who left after the Yankees had taken lead in the top of the inning.
MANDRAKE:. One of Narda’s old boy friends? Could be someone she dumped.
PHANTOM:. Caught up in Roboman’s hallucination. Will Kit find a hallucinatory path to get Roboman to shut itself off?
@Activist:
#66. PHANTOM:. Sure hope that young informant from two days ago survives the weekend with those goons.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: I suppose tonight we’ll be seeing a lot of replays of Kirk Gibson’s 1988 homer.
Wasn’t a Game 7 but I’ve seen references to Mazeroski in 1960 too.
@MKay: “Crazed overkill” Crazed Overkill? Yeah man I saw them open for Green Day one night at 924 Gilman in Berkeley back in the 80s. Awesome show, some dude got stabbed!
MW: Libby and Pierre are taking some days off for R&R. Their vocal cords have had a workout, so they’re gettin’ special throat massages as well as healing elixirs. That was an exhausting week for them
and us as wellbut they should be back in fine voice soon! I think the plan is for Ed and Estelle to take a walk on the Charterstone path for a week or so. Hey, Intern – did the clean-up crew take care of the walkway? Pierre was havin’ some GI issues with all the stress…RwO: A surprise appearance by Emmet Pismire, in the role of a generic “Bug”! A soaring Bug! No stunt double, that’s really Emmet. I know they don’t like Flying Insect roles using prosthetic wings, but the parasol is a lot more effective and comfortable. And don’t worry, we’re not relying on Mary Poppins *magic* to do the flight – there’s a 5hp motor under there.
As long as everyone’s talkin’ baseball, last night on the news I got strong Don Mossi vibes from watching Israeli military spokesman Rear Admiral Daniel Hagari. No one will ever excel Mossi – a true All Ugly Hall of Famer – but this new guy could be Don Mossi Lite.
Or, perhaps, Don Mossad?
I’ll be surprised if these links work, without moderator assistance, but it’s worth trying.
@Walk Him and Pitch to the Giraffe: Worked for me.
Carnac:
What do you do with an elephant with three balls?
If there’s one thing I know about Dagwood, it’s that he’s not interested in cookies if they have a trendy flavor.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: What do you do with an elephant with three balls?
That’s the joke.
@Baja Gaijin: @60: See, I want you to be joking, but…
BB: “Watch your shitty language, motherfuckers. There’s a cunt present.”
DT: All those workers many years ago were punching that enormous famous clock every day? No wonder it stopped running in 1958.
Ripley: Screw Elon Mush and his fancy space violins. Wally Schirra smuggled his Sousaphone onto the Gemini VI-A capsule in December of 1965 and serenaded NASA Mission Control with a bluesy rendition of “Saint James Infirmary.”
@MKay:
I was in the hospital a few Octobers ago and the nurse came in to change my I.V. drip. I asked her if instead of the regular medication she could give me the pumpkin spice-flavored kind. She broke up.
@Walk Him and Pitch to the Giraffe:
When Mossi pitched for the Cleveland Indians, it was said that when his manager went to the mound to pull the starter and he wanted Mossi to come in, he would signal this by holding his hands up next to his ears and flapping them.
@jroggs: #2
Great catch! The Red Sox’s logo is a red “B” but Ditto’s cap clearly shows the White Sox “Sox” logo.
@Cleveland Mocks: When Mossi pitched for the Cleveland Indians, it was said that when his manager went to the mound to pull the starter and he wanted Mossi to come in, he would signal this by holding his hands up next to his ears and flapping them.
Bobby Bragan was called the Brat for good reason. He got what he deserved for pulling that stunt one too many times that year when the elephant Dumbo flew in from the bullpen. “No, no, no,” he had to yell frantically, “I mean the LEFTY!”
You could look it up!
By all accounts, Don Mossi was a very fine gentleman and he did not deserve the ridicule. Then again, he is remembered today, when teammates of similar talent and accomplishment are long forgotten.
@jroggs: #53:
“Ditto for the roiders of the late ’90s and early ’00s”
A lot of people think McGuire and Sosa’s home run stats should be scratched because of that but one must remember that as juiced as those batters were the pitchers they faced were equally juiced so it was still an even playing field.
Hi and Lois – Getting the colors of the hat is bad from a comic. But worse is the LA Metro using AI to create a promo image, and not noticing that “Dodgers” is written in the Yankees logo, and one instance Yankees is spelled “Yank Yors”.
Blondie-“Mr. B, what’s a black widow?”
FC-“Have you seen the house I live in? Fake scares are nothing compared to the real scares I deal with everyday.”
FC-Don’t worry, Dolly, Grandma brought a pillow for you to hide your face in.
MW-Maybe you’ll catch Mary at the Bum Boat.
Blondie: Pumpkin spice is of course less a “hot craze” than an “annual running joke.” Relatedly or not, saying that one’s own mother is “heavily into pumpkin spice” sounds rather unwholesome.
H&L: Times have changed. If Hi had come out as a Sox fan back when he was Ditto’s age his family would have sent him to a conversion camp.
@Philip: I just read this morning that the AI known as “Whisper” often has hallucinations, and some of the hallucinations are offensive. I think that’s what I read. I remember sighing heavily. Anyway, if AI entities are having hallucinations these days, I suppose that giant hot dog could have been something worse.
I learned today that my pumpkin spice flavor frozen waffles are now on the Listeria recall list. They’re my favorite variety, but I guess I should throw them out. Although I’ve already eaten half the box with no ill effects… yet.
@Guillermo el chiclero: If some players were juiced back in 1968 when the Tigers won the Series and even some of us Detroit-area people who didn’t care about baseball were happy happy happy, I don’t want to know.
Next, tackling the hot new trend of women’s suffrage!
9CL: The thing about “Edda and Amos gawk over how hot she was/is” jags in this strip is that now it’s a blessed relief when their daughters aren’t involved.
C-Shaft: The only thing funny about the annual strings of Pizza Monster strips is the idea that Batiuk has convinced himself that this is a beloved recurring feature.
DT: “I used to punch the clock but now I’m out of the rat race. Get it? The rat race! Ah, what do you people know from funny?”
Dustin: “Some men also value sweetness and an interesting personality, but that’s not really going to help you.”
GT: Now that Gil has had to step back from coaching he spends a lot of time gelling his hair into horrible shapes.
JP: My more charitable take on this scene is that the creator of Medium Large intended it to be some kind of buffoonish comedy. Neddy’s been planning on how to confront Declan since she met his family and she could have accomplished the same thing by just yelling at a picture of him.
Lockhorns: Nah, I’d say that Leroy still pays by check because filling them out at a 19th century secretary makes him feel fancy.
MW: It’s Casual Friday at the clinic. If it’s also Casual Sex Friday Estelle is in for a true surprise.
Phantom: If Ian Mollusk had known ahead of time that his AI robot would be too dim to know it had taken a wrong turn at Albuquerque he might not have been so eager to clamp his own face on it.
@Arabella: I like your comments, so I tend to come down on the side of “throw them out.” But apparently healthy adults rarely become seriously ill. Sympathies on having to decide.
JP: Um, Neddy? It never did matter. Though now I’m wondering how old Declan is supposed to be, because he seems to have aged, and also whether he is Declan or DeClan.
BLONDIE: Fumigation does not mean…ye gods. I realize that your child can be annoying, Elmo’s parents, but this is much too drastic a solution!
@Poteet: Thank you, I’ll probably throw them out. No illnesses have been reported from them, so I guess it’s an “abundance of caution, cover your ass” thing. But I’m in a higher-risk demographic as a oldster. Maybe I’ll bake some pumpkin spice muffins instead. I’ll check the Mary Worth website for recipes.
Random Dick Tracy mashup.
@Poteet: Nah, that was way before the steroid era.
They were just on bennies and Jack Daniels.
@Arabella: Yes, throw them out. However, since you have already eaten some, look for the following symptoms.
1. Orange skin.
2. Stirring a cauldron and cackling.
3. Straddling a broomstick.
4. Extra hair growth during a full moon.
5. Fangs.
6. Urge to eat brains.
If any or all of these symptoms occur, don’t worry. They should all disappear by November 1st.
@Baja Gaijin: You must be consuming pumpkin spice.
@Philip: Also, the Yankees logo is spelled “Yankers.”
@Sid, Agent to the Animal Stars!: RwO: A surprise appearance by Emmet Pismire, in the role of a generic “Bug”!
Generic possibly, but I feel I brought some flair to the part. Did you notice the contact lenses I used? They went on my compound eyes – you can barely even spot the other three I have on top of my head, which was fine for this acting gig. I have to say the bigger eyes make me look a little butch, but I agreed the prosthetic lenses brought a certain wide-eyed wonder to my portrayal.
The green makeup irritated my exoskeleton – made me chitinitchy, if you will.
Ironically, I needed a three-martini lunch afterward to wind down from this strenuous performance – definitely in no mood for a froufrou mixed drink with a little umbrella, thankyouverymuch.
@Walk Him and Pitch to the Giraffe: Bobby Bragan was called the Brat
My apologies for the typo. What I meant to say is that “my memory is apparently that poor.” Not to mention, I won’t mention the actual nickname that baseball-reference.com shows for him.
All too frequently, the majority of characters channel Ted Forth.
So the punchline here is Hi spending time with Ditto? Now that is knee slappin’!
BLONDIE: Dagwood doing an Aside Glance every time a punchline is uttered may be intended as the visual equivalent of a laugh track, but to me it’s as pathetic and cringeworthy as when Jeb Bush had to beg his audience to clap for him. Plus it makes Dagwood look like a complete idiot who’s constantly being confused by everyone around him.
@TheDiva: LUANN: Lesbians in this strip? Has the Unperson-ing of Prudence taught you nothing?
I’m just sitting here enjoying my second bottle of Great Lakes Brewing Company’s superb Christmas Ale, catching up on the last three hours of commentary by you all, and chuckling and chortling out loud. Well done all! Cheers!
@TheDiva: Luann: My “Stef is a closeted lesbian” theory gains credence.
Across the Universe
@97 Dr. Ween: It is a real nightmare before Halloween.
JP: “Oh, Declan, there’s just one more thing!”
There’s an anecdote I heard about Shoeless Joe Jackson. Long after his baseball playing days were over he was working the cash register at a liquor store when in walks Ty Cobb. Jackson rings up Cobb’s purchase when the latter suddenly recognizes him and says, “Joe, don’t you know who I am?”. Jackson’s reply, “I know who you are, Cobb, but I thought none of you wanted to know me.”
@Guillermo el chiclero: Which brings up another issue about popular baseball narratives. Cobb definitely had issues, especially after his mother shot his father, but he was not an insane asshole, and, as far as I can make out, was fairly popular with other players.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX:
I’ve scrolled through all the comments and don’t see anyone correcting you. Elliot Asinov, as far as I can tell, was no relation to Isaac Asimov.
@Guillermo el chiclero:
A thousand wrongs don’t make a right.
@Bryan: Sometimes his dog does it. It’s not too much of an improvement, maybe just a little bit. Because “Dogs are great!”
@Guillermo el chiclero: Yeah, when I was a kid, there was a “very special” episode of the cartoon Arthur, that dealt with cancer.
Lance Armstrong made an appearance in that, but once it was revealed that he was doping himself up, PBS wanted nothing more to do with him, so the episode ended up disowned and would no longer air.
Which was a shame because it was such an important episode.
PBS apparently realized this, as some years later, they literally remade the episode without Lance Armstrong.
@Innocent Kids: “My Mom is heavily into pumpkin spice,* Mr. B.”
______________________
“You’re duned, Elmo.”
@Innocent Kids: “My Mom is heavily into pumpkin spice,* Mr. B.”
______________________________
“……she even snorts it at Christmastime.”
@Innocent Kids: “My Mom is heavily into pumpkin spice,* Mr. B.”
_________________________
“Did I ever tell you my Mom was Halloween Chick?,Mr B? If I Introduce you to my father, the Sandwich, do you promise you won’t make me an orphan?” “Does he have pastrami,Elmo, no promises.”
@Just John: @allangary: I’ve scrolled through all the comments and don’t see anyone correcting you. Elliot Asinov, as far as I can tell, was no relation to Isaac Asimov.
______________________________
But, I believe,you’ll find he WAS brother in-law to Boris Badinov.
@Walk Him and Pitch to the Giraffe: Bobby Bragan was called the Brat
__________________
“Brat’s on first, Coleslaw’s on second,Roast Beef’s on third.”, ” Who’s My Lunch?”, famous Abbot & Bumstead vaudeville routine.
@Cleveland Mocks: A toast right back atcha, CM!
@The Rambling Otter: Lance Armstrong made an appearance in that, but once it was revealed that he was doping himself up, PBS wanted nothing more to do with him, so the episode ended up disowned and would no longer air.
_________________________________________
“….And that incident turned Frazz Frazzington into the Frazz hole that he is today.
Now you know the REST of the story.”
@Cleveland Mocks: Great Lakes Brewing Company makes some good damn beer. I’ve tried their Pilseners and porters and ales when I’ve visited my beloved hometown, but not yet tried the Xmas Ale.
Enjoy your brew, and read on. Pee before you go to sleep, so you don’t have to get up at two.
@GarrisonSkunk: “Brat’s on first, Coleslaw’s on second,Roast Beef’s on third.”, ” Who’s My Lunch?”, famous Abbot & Bumstead vaudeville routine.
As long as the record going forward shows that Eddie Stanky was the Brat, I rest my case your honorableness, mea culpa.
SlylickFox and Comix For Kinx: Forrestville’s “Police Academy’s” reboot definitely needs Steve Gutenbird.
SlylickFox and Comix For Kinx: Forrestville’s “Police Academy” reboot definitely needs the talents of Steve Gutenbird.
Six Chex: When you realize your mother is a habitual stalker, but you’re relieved that at least she doesn’t have sex with cold cuts.
@Walk Him and Pitch to the Giraffe: As long as the record going forward shows that Eddie Stanky was the Brat,
___________________
…and Jerry Matthers as the Beaver.
The Familiar Mucus: “I know, dear, that’s why I put a blanket over your head when we’re out in public.”
Blondie: Has there been a “pumpkin spice” feminine douche yet?
@GarrisonSkunk: I do love my food puns.
“The Mayo Clinic is on line one, and a Mr. Hamm is waiting on line two.”
“Put on Hamm, hold the Mayo.”
@GarrisonSkunk: Leave it to Beaver literally killed my love for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
(True Story)
When TMNT fans talk about “Turtles Forever” treating the 1983 TMNT incarnations like a complete joke, they weren’t too far off of the mark, as one episode, had the turtles battling a mafia boss “The Beaver Cleaver!” who was a little kid and Wally was his toady.
I recall that they were battling him on an ice skating rink.
Little kid me said “This is really really stupid…” and I gave up the franchise more or less, since.
Although with TMNT I still love a lot of the lore elements and such, just… not everything else.
@Anonymous: “Do you ever feel
not so fresh?Out of your gourd?”@Anonymous: There is a pumpkin spice IUD that takes care of any seeds. The downside is that sperm looks at this as a challenge and attempts to defeat it.
@Anonymous: 129. That would be in bad taste,
“Did you know that Starbucks has been selling pumpkin spice lattes since 2003? That they are, in fact, even older than this blog? I’m just saying.”
Except that back then, it was a (mostly) un-ironic craze.
The pumpkin spice craze *today* is to consciously shoehorn it into as many stupid things as humanly possible, knowing that you are being excessive. Which, oddly, makes the Dagwood thing fit.