Mostly one-panel menaces
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Heathcliff, 6/16/25
This is, of course, a hilarious joke about rectal thermometers, and I laud the strip for being subtle enough to not use the words “rectal” or “butthole” or anything like that. However, just to make sure you get the point, Heathcliff’s butt, hanging out the window for his protection, has been depicted in a subtle but still vividly shapely manner, with gentle curves letting us know that yes, the punchline of this panel is specifically about Heathcliff’s ass.
Herb and Jamaal, 6/16/25
Look, Jamaal, I’ve been frank and open about the fact that I too struggle with difficulty remembering the names of acquaintances, even when I remember so many stories about them and details of their lives that it would be extremely embarrassing to ask them, once again, what their name is. So I appreciate you trying out this little “life hack” here, but I don’t think it’s practical. Think of all the social interactions required just to ensure you both end up at the same coffee shop at the same time! Surely his name’s going to come up at some point in that process. So, I like your creativity, but let’s keep brainstorming on this.
Dennis the Menace, 6/16/25
Oh NO but your mom ISN’T HERE RIGHT NOW so he’s gonna DRIVE RIGHT INTO A WALL and you guys AREN’T EVEN IN CHILD SEATS, this is gonna be a BLOODBATH
142 replies to “Mostly one-panel menaces”
DtM: I’m mildly fixated on the scene outside the rear window of the car, wondering if it’s the comics equivalent of the process screen technology used in old movies.
Heathcliff:
That’s interesting minimalist signage that the veterinarian has out in front of his place. He must embrace William of Ockham’s philosophy that “Entities should not be multiplied beyond necessity.”
Mary Worth Mashup: Slight verbal NSFW.
DtM:
“But as you can see from the empty seat next to my dad, Mom is like Schrodinger’s cat. She’s here — but she isn’t.”
DtM: Meanwhile, the woman behind the Mitchells’ car is forced to ask directions from a small child at the bus stop.
MW: Hi, we’re the Smurfs, and we’ll be right back with “One to Grow On”.
Dennis – Given the bench seats, I’d say Dad is still driving a 1964 Buick with the early non-retractable seat belt and shoulder harnesses. Dad’s sly smile implies he knows a well-planned collision will surely decapitate Dennis. Yes, it’s worth it…
DtM: Look at Henry’s face. He told the boys that they were just going out for frosty chocolate milkshakes but the lack of child restraints for Dennis and Joey, who are three and a half feet at best, betrays his ultimate plan to off all three of them at once. Enjoy your milkshakes, boys. Enjoy them in Hell.
H&J: Is it facial blindness, internal racism, or early onset dementia? Only Jamaal knows and he’ll try to deny at least two of them.
MW: At this point, I’m not surprised that Dawn is gaslighting herself into thinking that her father is the biggest victim of the whole situation. No, you misfired chromosome, the biggest victim was the audience for having to read this crap.
Heathcliff: OK, I get the joke after thinking about it. But it looks like the joke is that Heathcliff is a sick perverted voyeur who hangs around outside doctors’ offices to watch people get thermometers inserted into them. He’s a sick freak and I hope the Garbage Ape cancels him.
H&J: “Hey, uh, you, let’s get coffee!”
“Great idea! Say, don’t you own a diner?”
“Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… no that’s a different Jamaal.”
DTM: Translate it how? Is the satnav stuck in Korean or something? If Henry’s too stupid to understand “In 100 yards, turn left” without his wife dumbing it down for him, I don’t think he should be behind the wheel.
Heathcliff: I just like the idea that Heathcliff is ready to make his escape in a split second, butt-first.
H&J I feel like this would be a much better trick if you didn’t own and operate a restaurant that presumably serves coffee? Like, I really thought the punchline here was going to involve that somehow.
Josh you need to go back in time and inform young starry-eyed college-Josh that he would end up making a living talking about Heathcliff’s ass.
This is the most important reason for the invention of time travel yet found.
Heathcliff:
“Lawd almighty, I feel my temperature risin’….”
“Doctor, why is the temperature gauge singing an Elvis Presley hit?!?”
“This is an aural thermometer!”
@Pozzo: There’s more bodies there than a recent birthday party I was made aware of.
Dennis the Menace: Like me, Joey is wondering if “translate” is just a cheerful way of explaining “Hear that? She said you should go fuck yourself.”
Heathcliff – He kept prescribing suppositories, but for all the good they did, he’d just as well shoved them up his ass….
H&J – Here ya go, Asshole….
DtM – If only it wasn’t set to Esperanto….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
MW: This. Is. REVOLTING.
@Banana Jr. 6000: It reeks of gaslighting and parental incest…and ironically those are the two least offensive things about this strip.
MW: These whole last few days of strips could have easily just been the Jon Snow/Game of Thrones “Hello Darkness, My Old Friend” GIF
MW: And, we’re into Week 2 of the “Wilbur and Dawn Reconciliation Tour”, Campers! Last week, we thrilled to the relief of escaping death by a mere hairsbreadth, the misunderstandings, the guilt. This week, we’re witness to the touching (?!!) bonding of father and daughter as they admit their screw-ups to each other, acknowledge their mutual failings, and cement their relationship as complete fuck-ups who are forever connected by dint of DNA and an airtight lease of the shared condo at Charterstone. Stay tuned for Week 3 as we continue the love fest! We’ll see tears, smiles, hugs, and even kisses as the “Wilbur and Dawn Reconciliation Tour” travels back to Charterstone and a long-awaited reunion with Willa, the Goldfish! Buckle up for all the excitement that’s in store, Campers!
DtM looks to be drawing from the FC playbook in repurposing old art. The curved rear window, front bench seat and humped dashboard place Henry’s car straight out of the 1950s or early 60s. Those front-passenger-only headrests and awkwardly angled shoulder belts – especially Henry’s, which attaches to the roof and not a pillar – scream last-minute additions.
Josh, I’m a little concerned about your loving attention to Heathcliff’s butt. Do your cats have a safe word?
@Charterstoned: I’m pretty sure Wilbur gave his fish power of attorney and he still hasn’t switched it from Stellan to Willa. Dawn is about on par with the cleaning lady who probably committed seppuku after seeing Wilbur’s bathroom during his “bathrobe era.”
Dennis the Menace: It’s a pretty neat trick for Joey and Henry to exchange sidelong glances from backseat to front. So, you wanna “Wiseguys” this kid, or what?
Slylock Fox-Slylock is going to have Max spend the night in the room.
RMMD-“Cody is a very popular fellow. Men are constantly going in and out of his room.”
MW-“Dad, I loved a really dangerous person once.” Wilbur? Is Dawn talking about Wilbur? Remember this is a man who made people think he was dead.
I would love to see the way Carnac the Magnificent handled this. “One week.” [Tearing open envelope] “How long will Heathcliff stay on the subject of Heathcliff’s ass?”
DtM: Original caption said something about Rand McNally I’m betting.
H&J: There’s also a standing joke about baristas humorously slaughtering customers’ names on the cups. So, Jamaal risked about a 50% chance of yelling out, “Have a nice day, Lurpy!”
MW: You can always count on family to forgive you when you share the same idiot genes.
Herb and Jamaal: It seems like it would be pretty easy to remember that Larry is the dude with no fingers drinking a cup of coffee that goes from his adam’s apple all the way down to his belly button. Maybe it’s just me.
MW:
“Dawnie, given the ubiquity of our navy blue surroundings, let’s go down the street to the karaoke joint and sing Jim Morrison’s tribute to Zoe Saldana: ‘(She’s A) Twentieth-Centauri Fox’ !”
DT: So, an evil clone courtesy of Diet Smith Tech?
GT: Is the pitcher a rare switch pitcher? On Saturday he was a lefty, now he is a righty. What an enormous backstop wall (?)
RMMD: I guess the clerk just keeps Truck albums around just in case he runs into Truck?
MW: In universe, outside of the creeps, none of the Westons actually know how dangerous Belle really is, so their obliviousness goes on.
Heathcliff – If Norman Rockwell guest authored on Heathcliff, this would be the sort of joke he would do.
Herb and Jamaal – The problem with this is a cliche that the coffee shop always misspells that name, so it turns about his name is actually Gary.
Dennis the Menace – On one level, Henry hates that his son is shit-talking him. On the other hand, while Dennis is the slowest learner in his class, he does misogyny at a sixth-grade level. All he needs to do is teach Dennis some discretion and Dennis can get by just fine in life as a mid-level executive in a Fortune 500 company
@Nobody: AAA nine-fold or GTFO
GT – I’m loving Leo’s expression in panel three. “You’re signaling for a curveball? Why, I oughta..”
No seatbelts, the front seat is not two separate seats… death by clip art!
@Liam: I’m glad that someone said it. Dirk was loud and unhinged but Wilbur is much more of a psychological abuser considering that he not only put Dawn’s life at risk so he could continue his arguably non consensual relationship but made her think he was dead so that he could “surprise her.”
@Philip: Menace Men
DtM: Maybe Dennis being Dennis reprogrammed the GPS to a foreign language neither of them understand. Alice tries her best to translate.
GPS: Tourner á Nord
“Ah, turn at Nordstroms.”
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV: Or that
@lynn:
Me-oww!
DT: “Tracy, someone has stolen the Smith Industries secret process for mass-producing Icarus Lovejoys.”
This is an oral thermometer. However, I am not in your insurance network, so you’re getting fucked in the ass anyway!
DtM: why is Dennis giving Joey the bedroom eyes? Ands what’s with Henry’s knowing glance? “Ahhh, what a chip off the old block. My third-grade aged child is gonna get his first same-sex blowjob. Memory, all alone in the moonlight/I can smile at the old days/ I was beautiful then…”
Heath.: Not sure I’d trust this vet. The so-called oral thermometer he’s holding looks like he tore it off of a giveaway mechanic’s calendar.
I don’t like coffee so I don’t order it, but I’d like to think I’m tuned into the zeitgeist and know full well that the joke is Jamaal is taking a huge chance on ending up calling his acquaintance “Carky”.
MW: “Wait. My love interest was threatening to me and your love interest was threatening to me. I’m beginning to see a pattern here.”
Does the veterinarian has his office in a normal suburban home? I mean, I am in favour, but it surely goes against zoning regulations!
MW: Are they going to make out now?
@Hibbleton: Dawn is essentially Milhouse in that she turns more and more into a spineless, unsympathetic wuss but is still used as a plot device.
Yes, Pluggers are the only ones who make butt calls, that’s why there’s a specific term for it that Pluggers apparently don’t know.
I erroneously labeled myself a plugger yesterday, thanks for the support and clearing that up for me you guys :3
If you are the sort of person who searches the newspaper comics for dick jokes (and I feel certain that such people are in fact out there), you will want to know that there is one in today’s Agnes. You’re welcome.
@The Rambling Otter: You referred to yourself as a Plugger and people who are not you said you weren’t. Is it the definition of a Plugger that you don’t fit? What is the exact definition anyway?
BLONDIE: First time I’ve noticed Dag’s shirt has no buttons. Has he always worn a long sleeved tee to work?
JP: ah, first birthday gadventure! They’re blessed to have each other’s backs (yesterday’s sermon was Ecc. 4:9)
@Ettorre: Bench front seats were great, you could jam one or possibly two if you had 3-on-a-tree automatic transmission) disposable kids between the driver and the other adult passenger.
Because he could not stop for Death —
Death kindly stopped for Henry —
The Caddie held but just Themselves —
And Dennis and Joey.
“My father set the GPS’s language to French and he has been unable to change it back, this is why my mother has to translate the directions into English. If you think men are too stubborn to ask for directions, you should see how opposed he is to asking for technical help!”
@lynn: It’s one of those things that I only saw in comics and movies, so I thought it was artistic licence. I never knew old American cars actually had them!
H’cliff: I think Heathcliff is just being troublesome so he can score some of the good sedatives.
H&J: In addition to the misspelling/mispronunciation issues mentioned above, Jamaal has neglected to consider the possibility of his acquaintance giving the barista a fake name for shiggles. There’s a non-zero chance he assumes one of his friends is named Darth Vader.
@Bone spurs: LOL
Herb & Jamaal: Jamaal, that doesn’t help at all! You say your method when you forget acquaintances’ names is to give them coffee because “they always write your name on your cup”… But you already KNOW your OWN NAME, right? Or do you occasionally forget whether you’re Herb or Jamaal? Lord knows I can never remember. Maybe everybody in your comic strip should wear name tags or something.
Oh by the way, “Dawnie”, you hurt Dirk a lot more than he hurt you. You assaulted him with a 15-pound weight! I don’t downplay his psychological abuse. I said at the time that the story was a too-realistic portrayal of an abusive relationship. But there were other solutions. Dawn could have expressed her concerns, gotten friends to intervene, dumped him, or simply ghosted him. She’s lucky that didn’t end with a police investigation, and/or Dawn being sued for medical expenses.
It need hardly be said that the authorities need to get involved in the entire Wilbur-Belle-Avery scenario.
@Baja Gaijin:
“I thought you would never ask.”
@seismic-2:
‘Mary Worth’ is full of dick jokes everyday. It’s name is Wilbur.
@lynn: Comment of the Week here. Well done, still chuckling.
C’shaft: Hey, have you noticed that airlines are charging for everything these days? Wouldn’t it be wacky if they started charging for basic amenities and safety equipment? That’s a bold new take that hasn’t been done by absolutely everyone else on the planet and been used multiple times by this strip in particular!
Dustin: I have long been convinced that Dustin has undiagnosed ADHD, but up until now I was convinced that Parker and Kelly didn’t know he could be read that way. Now I’m certain that they not only deliberately code him as neurodivergent, but that they believe this marks him as socially and biologically unfit, and if he cannot be “cured” he must be institutionalized for the benefit of the state.
JP: OH JUST KISS ALREADY!
MW: Yes, Belle treated Dawn like crap, made her feel unwelcome and unsafe in her own home, and her concerns were dismissed and ignored. But Wilbur almost lost his pet goldfish! He’s sad now because someone was having sex with him and now she’s been taken away! His pain is absolutely the greatest and most important thing about this situation because he, the Sub-Average White Man, is the absolute center of the universe!
H&J: That went well! Not like last week with my other aquaintance, Halfcaffsoylatte.
H&J: But what do you do when you’ve forgotten the name of “local coffee shop”, which is the only rational explanation for speaking the way Jamaal does?
@Banana Jr. 6000: The thing is, as emotionally and mentally abusive as Dirk was he could have been a lot worse. He didn’t act jealous, attempt to isolate her from her friends and family, or indicate he would hurt her or himself if she tried to leave him. In fact, he walked (well, limped) away the moment she showed the slightest hint of a spine. It’s weird how Dawn is managing to both overplay and underplay her ordeal for the sake of her father’s ego.
“This an oral thermometer. I am a veterinarian, as indicated by the abbreviated sign outside. You are the owner of an orange cat. That is an orange cat names Heathcliff. Look, ma’am, I’ll do this all day at $120 an hour, but I really don’t think your cat has reached the Symbolic function substage of Piaget’s theory of cognitive development, no matter what his fascination with flags might indicate.”
H&J – I would rather fall on my sword and admit I can’t remember someone’s name than buy them a coffee. Mostly because I’m not a big coffee drinker, but also – if I can’t remember their name, do I really want to spend $5 to learn it?
Heathcliff: The red bulb at the end suggests that’s an an old-fashioned, unsafe mercury-in-glass thermometer, which have been discouraged for use in the U.S. by both the American Academy of Pediatrics and the Environmental Protection Agency for more than two decades. Or else the vet is a perv and it’s some kind of kitty sex toy, in which case, gross.
@Banana Jr. 6000: It’s amazing how Dawn is both a victim and a perpetrator but she’s acting like her actions and what she’s been through are both worse and not as bad as what Wilbur went through. You know, because not feeling safe in your own home is not as terrible as losing access to having sex constantly with a woman who you barely know.
@TheDiva: Your comment for Judge Parker works equally (and horrifically) well for Mary Worth.
@TheDiva: Dirk acted more like an adult toddler overall, being pushy and demanding that Dawn conform to what he wanted or he would call her names. It definitely wasn’t right and it was uncomfortable but we’ve seen Wilbur do worse to Estelle like threatening to harm her emotional support animal and humiliating her when she was on a date as well as making her think that he was dead because he wanted to “surprise her.”
DtM – “Jah?” thinks protofuhrer Joey. “Perhaps someday I could translate for ein entire volk? Der possibilities are endless!”
@TheDiva: Dirk wouldn’t do any of those things unless his e-book on neg-hitting told him to. His abuse of Dawn seemed like a (badly) learned behavior, not who he really was. His relationship with Dawn would have ended just like it did for every other man who tried this act in 2004; she would have gotten tired of it, and quietly disappeared from his life. Which makes her over-the-top violent reaction even more out of line.
@Needless Exposition: The very assertion that Wilbur is the victim in all this is downright offensive. At best, he took advantage of a woman who escaped from her full-time adult supervision, and ignored the implication that she was using him as a sexual substitute for her own brother. And that’s the *intended* interpretation; it’s not hard to come up with much darker scenarios.
Don Abundio, translated:
“I picked up your ticket, Don Abundio. Is this a business trip?”
“No, actually. I don’t even know where it’s going”
“I just know this is the airline for me!”
[Sign: HOOTERS AIR]
H&J-“Wait, Larry! That’s the poisoned cup!”
Dennis the Menace-In bed.
MW-“Oh, Dad. I barely got out of an emotionally abusive bordering on physical abusive relationship but the pain of your one time Summer fling turning out to be a crazy person is greater than my pain.”
@Rube:
Given that Pluggers are overweight and sagging, there are too many body parts that could accidentally dial someone
@Banana Jr. 6000: Having Avery show up to just whisk Belle away makes the situation even more suspect rather than solve the problem. How/why did Belle escape from her “loving brother” and avoid taking her medication for weeks? If she was so unstable without her medication or any supervision, then how was she able to meet Wilbur on the cruise and have him think she was a competent businesswoman? Was she ever stable at any point during this whole situation? We all know that the only reason that Avery showed up is to absolve Wilbur of any consequences or responsibility for his actions like giving Belle his full address and his obviously repeated acts of sexual misconduct.
@Activist:
#52. JP: of course I typed “first big adventure”. But AS took over– an abbreviation I’ll use to indicate the opposite of Artificial Intelligence
Shoe: We complain about reused artwork quite a bit here, but it looks like the Shoe creative trust glitched out trying to come up with a full-face design for Senator Belfry.
@Dr. Larry Erhardt: I guess it’s just as well that they didn’t try to show the “gaggle of lobbyists.” If they were not geese, I would be very disappointed.
GT: “Volcano!! Vesuvius is erupting! Everybody run! That chain link fence that suddenly appeared in the outfield won’t save us!”
MW: Lugnuts would be more insightful than these two.
Heathcliff – Zits did the thermometer up the ass gag so much better a few days ago, with no inhibitions about saying rectal.
***
Rectum?! Shoot, it killed him!
@Banana Jr. 6000: “Get help, Karen” is the new “Get help, Brooke.”
@Activist: Is he LDS? He only has that one wife….
@BillieVee: There was a picture on Facebook or somewhere of a cup with “Brian with a y” written on it.
As for me, I just use Rocky. They usually spell that correctly, and it makes me sound like a badass.
@Baja Gaijin: What we all were thinking.
H&J: I’d like to see some comic-strip character trying to deal with mild face blindness like some of us have, but I will admit that it wouldn’t make for gripping stories like watching Bella try to poison Dawn.
DTM: That’s why Henry had to kill her.
Mary Worth – Make. It. Stop. PLEASE.
I never thought I’d feel this way, but it will be a relief when Mary shows up for her victory lap. Bring on the platitudes.
9CL – That second panel is the most horrific thing I’ve seen for quite a while.
Dennis the Menace – Yup. As several Mudges have noted, no car today has bench seats like that. The original most likely had Dennis and Joey in car seats that hook over the back of the bench seat, like Maggie Simpson’s car seat.
When I was in grade school, we used one of those car seats for my baby sister. The car seat had a steering wheel on a metal bar attached to it. My mother took the steering wheel off because she didn’t think it was safe.
Herb & Jamal – Mulva?
FC – Dolly sure is a smug little tattle tale.
@Voshkod: Bwahaha!
@Baja Gaijin: Yep, we needed that.
@The Rambling Otter:
Pluggers are notoriously self-unaware. You are very self-aware. Pluggers also are not funny, except unintentionally. You have great wit.
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV: Or a Trip-Tik.
@I speak Jive: I’ll take Mary doing Wilbur’s job for him and writing cryptic platitudes about herself over this. We’ve had nothing but Westonmania since, what, December?
@Needless Exposition: My theory:
How/why did Belle escape from her “loving brother”
How: Belle has an inheritance, trust fund, settlement, or some other independent source of income. It explains how she was able to buy a cruise trip and a last-second cross-country flight.
Why: Avery is trying to control Belle to get access to this money. I think he’s more likely to be her husband than her brother. But he doesn’t have to be either; he could just be a scammer. On top of whatever he is, he also abuses her.
how was she able to meet Wilbur on the cruise
The cruise was Belle’s first attempt to escape Avery. It makes no sense for Avery to have been there, because no “loving brother” would let someone under his care hook up with a rando. He would have at least introduced himself to Wilbur, which means Wilbur would have known who he was when he showed up at his door.
If she was so unstable without her medication or any supervision
She can go without her medication for a little while without ill effect. But by the trip to Charterstone, it had been too long. Note that she went to Wilbur almost immediately after the cruise ended, which wouldn’t have given her enough time to restabilize her medication regime.
how was she able to meet Wilbur on the cruise and have him think she was a competent businesswoman?
Wilbur is extremely stupid. Especially when he thinks he’s going to get laid.
We all know that the only reason that Avery showed up is to absolve Wilbur of any consequences
Which makes perfect sense if Avery’s only real interest in Belle is her bank account. He doesn’t care what Wilbur did to Belle, and doesn’t want any authorities getting involved. He wants to grab her with whatever half-assed justification he can come up with, and be gone. Which is exactly what he did.
Was she ever stable at any point during this whole situation?
See above. Belle is relatively stable when medicated, but by the time she tried to murder Dawn the meds had worn off completely. The story gave us no information about what’s actually wrong with Belle, but it most be something serious if it leads to this behavior.
Luann: It’s not the best advertisement for a tutoring service that the tutor has a second job cleaning toilets at a hot dog stand.
@The Rambling Otter: No one is a Plugger who doesn’t want to be. That is all.
@Ettorre:
Q: What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
A: The taste.
@Ettorre: Does the veterinarian has his office in a normal suburban home? I mean, I am in favour, but it surely goes against zoning regulations!
He must be in Houston. We don’t have any.
@Rube: I make butt dials all the time. I just hang up.
@treetown: RMMD: Doug’s a real fan boi.
@Peanut Gallery:
¿Leer o “leer” en inglés? Abundio tiene todo el tiempo del mundo para eso.
DTM: “My Mom says my Dad couldn’t find his ass with both hands and a search party.”
@Banana Jr. 6000: Your idea would have made for a much more interesting story if Belle was actually the victim of her abusive brother who gaslights her into believing that she’s much sicker than she is. She probably would have had a combination of a legitimate mental disorder like bipolar disorder and a chronic illness like hypothyroidism (which would explain her eyes protruding so much and it’s also believed that thyroid dysfunction could make symptoms of bipolar disorder worse) that she can control with some help but Avery would have decided to cut off that help to keep her from being perfectly stable. So Belle would be trying to escape Avery’s control but he’s able to manipulate everyone into believing that Belle is a danger to himself and others. If anything, that is a much more likely scenario than just “Belle is crazy.”
@Violet: “I don’t have time to read, I’ll be too busy leering!” is a good alternative punchline.
Crank: My favourite take on “so called ‘cheap’ flights that charge extra for everything” came from the comedy songwriter Mitch Benn. (There’s a longer version on one of his CDs that doesn’t actually name the airline.) In 2010. Why not come up with a really original observation on air travel, Ed, like “What’s the deal with the food?”
FC: “Dolly is a narc” is my least favourite Family Circus genre. It’s not even clear if this is the mildly more tolerable “Dolly is a narc about rules that only exist in her own weird melon-shaped head” or not.
H&J, meta: My life-hack for forgetting people’s names is to cultivate a reputation as something between an absent-minded professor and a genial buffoon, so that most of my aquaintances just kind of assume I’m not going to remember their names, making it less embarassing. Well, maybe not so much a “life-hack” as a thing that’s happened.
JP: Not the only hand-holding by two very good gal pals I’ve seen in the comics today, and only marginally less subtext than the one between two women who have outright expressed an attraction to each other and, depending on your definition, may have already had sex.
MW: Ugh. My fellow ‘Mudges have said it better than I could, but I’d like to add that it’s Monday. Either there’s going to be another week of this, or this is just setting the scene for them going round to Mary’s, choking down some muffins, and explaining how her advice was directly responsible for solving everything, somehow. Which may actually be worse.
(For those who’ve forgotten, Mary’s advice to Dawn was that she should explain how she felt to her dad again, so she did and he completely ignored her again. Her advice to Wilbur was to suggest he should actually care how Dawn felt, and he completely ignored her as well.)
S4th: I just want to acknowledge that Ted Forth recognises that a “staycation” means not going anywhere. I don’t know how things are in the States, but over here there’s been a growing trend to use the word to mean “holidaying in the UK rather than going abroad”, and I think we need to fight it. (I’d be happier if no-one used the ridiculous word at all, but I’ve learned to pick my battles.)
SH: “Uh-oh, looks like these people who have no reason not to know the secret might be about to learn the secret — nope, they’ve explained it away to themselves, never mind!” What is this, The Phantom?
@Needless Exposition: I like your theory too.
No offence meant towards Mr Weber, but even Lt Columbo would be embarrassed to tell a jury….”he’s guilty of breaking and entering because the black marble wasn’t on the top of the stack.”
Do you ever have days like this?
Henry’s vaguely approving glance MAKES this.
“Yes, son, emasculate me. Your mother must learn what a sad, pathetic, sorry man I am. She must wear the SS uniform. You go fuck around at Wilson’s, Joey can watch, I guarantee he’s into it.”
@Horace Broon: Why not come up with a really original observation on air travel, Ed, like “What’s the deal with the food?”
__________________________________
Tonight on “Crankfeld”, Eddie wonders what the deal is with airline peanuts as he has a contest with his diner friends to see who is master of their domain. ” Now, THAT’S must see tv!”- Slappy Squirrel
@Sequitur: Do you ever have days like this?
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Elmo forgot the A-1™sauce!
@GarrisonSkunk: And there’ll probably be a lawsuit from the crooked cartoonist because he broke a leg slipping on the marbles underfoot. Sly and Max also could end up in the hospital because Fox didn’t take into account that they were several floors up. Jay Wardly is fine, though, being a bird and all.
(Interesting artwork on the walls, too, with the animal version of Ghost World and “Wolverhino.” There’s Beetle, too, and is that Miss Buxley in a bikini? And on the monitor, one of the pre-animal-apocalypse treasures, Creation of Adam.)
@Peanut Gallery: “Get it?!? Its a ” Lear” jet!
@Dr. Pill: There’s Beetle, too, and is that Miss Buxley in a bikini?
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Shouldn’t Beetle be an actual beetle? Or have a mop top covering his eyes? Or be a VW Bug version of “Turbo Teen”? I forgot to mention in my original post, I appreciate the Jay Ward shout out.
Also, for the fans of Bob Weber Jr. ( you’d BETTER be), today’s is off the charts. The mystery is preposterous, Jay Wardly’s expression priceless (“yeah, Fox, the window, sure”), and I would pay him good money to do something, ANYTHING, with Wolverhino.
@Dr. Pill: glad i wasn’t the only one to catch the Dan Clowes gag.
Mark Trail Mix: I notice Mark doesn’t mention how the red fox habitually says, “You big dummy!” when the cubs forage incorrectly.
@Tom T.: This is one of the many problems with keeping the protagonist nineteen. Luann has been nineteen for a decade, and by now she has taken at least nine years of college classes. Having her clean toilets at a hotdog stand doesn’t really make sense after nine years of college if she is supposed to have normal learning abilities and intellige….wait a minute. Oh.
@GarrisonSkunk: *GROAN-APPLAUSE*
@Poteet:
She could be a Psychology major, c’mon now
MT: At this point, what is badly needed is a giant hook.
@A Grave Mind: Okay, so I laughed, but it was a GUILTY laugh.
Dennis the Menace Spanish to English.
Rex Morgan M.D. Spanish to English.
Agnes: Leaky dick is everywhere.
Bacön: So, now you know.
@Sequitur: Agnes: Leaky dick is everywhere
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I thought Klondike Kat caught him in the last episode.
@131 GarrisonSkunk:
No, that was Underdog because he was under the dog.
Agnes-I like The Ventures.
@Peanut Gallery: @GarrisonSkunk:
Don Abundio is so much more layered than I’ve been giving it credit for.
MW: Wilbur and Dawn chit-chat away the time as they wait for the delousing light to do its job.
@lynn: Bench front seats were great.
Yes, and you could park at the curb, slide across, and get out on the right side of the car, out of traffic. You will see this often in old movies.
@White Rabbit: You could also, as a front-seat passenger, have some actual faint hope of getting your left foot over onto the brake if the driver suddenly fainted, had a massive cardiac infarction, etc. Now I’m pretty sure I’d have to release my seat belt and dive to the left and try to push hard on the damn brake with my hand, while not being able to see where the car is even going, assuming I could even lunge over that far and that the unconscious driver didn’t still have a foot firmly on the gas pedal.
What?
@Philip: Pluggers: We have your butt-dial, your hip-dial, your belly-dial, and your boob-dial, just to name a few.
@Bob Tice: Awwww, thank you!
@Poteet: “I want to die like my Grandpa, peacefully in my sleep, and not screaming and panicking like all the passengers in his car.”
Can’t remember where I read that, but it’s stuck with me.
My 1964 Chevrolet Biscayne (2 on the post) had lap belts only. Shoulder decapitators came in much later. The heater didn’t work, but it was a good old car, 6 cylinders, survived two literal fender benders without having to be totaled.
I told my dad “That lamp post jumped 20 feet just to hit me on purpose.”