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Your COTW shortly, but first, a note on the health of Judge Parker artist Eduardo Barreto: It appears that while he is very ill, things may be more hopeful than previously indicated, and the syndicate is not planning on replacing him any time soon, but will rather give him time to get better and see if he’s still up to it. So, we will have to endure some replacement artists, but hopefully he will be up and better before too long. Fingers crossed!

And now, your COMMENT OF THE WEEK!

“I love how Mrs. Drunky McDrunkerson is willing to give every relevant detail about Kurt, but NOT ONE DETAIL MORE! ‘I’m willing to (hic) answer 10 or 11 questions and fill in some background detail, but that’s IT! (hic)'” –Patrick

And the extremely funny runners up!

“I love how Jeffy is smugly shitting himself. ‘You think peanut butter is bad, bitch? We’re sharing a room tonight!'” –It’s time to pay the price

“Mark Tail, Panel 2: ‘Judge Parker does gratuitous ass shots all the time, so why can’t I?'” –One-eyed Wolfdog

“To be fair, Trixie is 55 years old now and has never been continent. It’d be pissing me off by that point as well.” –TruthOfAngels

“I really like Spiderman this week, learning about all the Marvel™ characters who live in New York. Mainly what I’m learning is that they’re all pricks.” –JD

“My brain pretty much freezes up at attempting to comprehend how unsophisticated someone would have to be to regard Mark Trail as a fancy city dweller.” –Violet

“Now you and your friend here can pack up and go back to your fancy city, what with all the ’lectricity and indoor plummin’ and laws against marryin’ your sisters.” –Perky Bird

“For today’s matinee, the part of Helen Clark will be played by David Bowie. The part of the whiskey will be played by Orange Tang.” –willethompson

“I think her first questions will be, ‘How come Drew cheated on me and will he ever come back?’ and ‘Do I look hot in purple?'” –Gabacho

“I think Wilbur needs to get a refund from Glamour Shots.” –Gump Worsley

“Meanwhile, in MT, why is Mark checking his watch? ‘Uh oh, it’s half past Wednesday. Time to wrap up this plot line with a few good hits and get back to ignoring my wife.'” –Nekrotzar

“The squirrels have learned of violence! We are doomed!” –The Eric

“On another note, the only interesting characters in this strip are alleged alcoholics. What happened to us? When did a glamorous and acceptable social tradition morph into a crippling social stigma?” –trey le parc

“Given that Helen Clark is now head of the United Nations Development Programme, this Mary Worth storyline could have global ramifications … which would be a nice change from storylines even the characters in the strip don’t appear to particularly care about.” –Meg

“Also, what’s up with the giant Q-Tips on Dawn’s table? I’m starting to wonder just how far she’ll go to get a sample of Kurt’s DNA.” –Phila

“I don’t know who you think you are, young lady, but unless you’re calling about providing me with more delicious transmission fluid, please leave me alone.” –Edgy DC

“Considering we see no web strand being released in panel 2 in conjunction with the ‘Thwip!’ effect, it can only be assumed that it’s the sound of Spider-Man’s sciatica acting up in typical form.” –tb4000

“Moy certainly has her cliched portrait-of-a-lifelong-drunk hiccups down, but I’m disappointed Giella hasn’t followed suit by giving this old crow a gin-blossomed nose, a few ethereal circles floating around her head, and a jauntily-cocked lampshade for a hat. Perhaps you can afford to retain visual dignity when you make your Bloody Marys with the actual blood of the working class.” –frippy

“Senior Plugger Dog Man got a crick in his neck by licking his own balls for four straight hours.” –Ned Ryerson

“The best part of the throwaway panels of Blondie: Dagwood staring blankly into space as he wonders what the hell he just bought. This changes the entire strip from ‘Herb’s hidden feelings’ to ‘Herb frantically tries to undo the florist’s brainwashing by smashing through Dagwood’s wall of cognitive dissonance.'” –Dragon of Life

“Is that a little shot glass built into the handset? You know, for added strength during difficult conversations.” –MattF

“Dawn has been yelled at so hard it’s literally given her a concussion! Next three strips: Dawn pukes on the couch and has an emotional crisis about cleaning it up.” –Trae Dorn

“My initial assumption was that she was dead, but then I remembered that I wasn’t reading Funky Winkerbean, but Crankshaft, where boundless cruelty comes from other people, rather than from the universe itself.” –Captain Thunder

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