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Funky Winkerbean, 7/19/10

Well, Funky has left the light-hearted whimsy of his coma-dream trip to the past behind and must, like all of us, return to the grim present, where, by iron law, no joy will happen, ever. If you just saw this exchange between Funky and his doctor written out, you might think that they were sharing a light-hearted little joke to break up the mood, but their numb, expressionless faces indicate that neither of them have even heard of these so-called “jokes” of which you speak. So Funky will be deep-throating an enormous plastic dildo twice daily for a reason nobody can or will explain, and he’s just going to have accept that.

Archie, 7/19/10

Archie’s laid-back attitude seems to be irritating his angry, tightly wound boss, but then he probably should have expected this sort of personality clash when he went to work for G. Gordon Liddy. Anyone who forces his employees to wear on their hats the severed heads of the chickens they serve up to their customers definitely has some rage issues.