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Mary Worth, 7/12/05

The Comics Curmudgeon (TCC) and the Future Mrs. Curmudgeon (TFMC) are taking a walk. TCC is describing today’s Mary Worth to his intended.

TCC: … and you see all these vibration lines coming off of Rita in all directions. She’s got the shakes, man! She’s definitely going to drop those damn swans. And when she does, she’ll realize what a pathetic loser she is, and then…

TFMC: She’ll slit her wrists with one of the shards?

TCC: Wow. I was going to say that she was going to check herself into the Betty Ford Clinic, but that’s … much better.

TFMC: Don’t you think “shard” is a good word?

Ain’t I lucky, folks? Not only is she willing to talk about Mary Worth on our walks, but she’s always willing to push the envelope of good taste, which is what this blog needs. Here’s to true love!

Speaking of love, I don’t love the fact that I have to go in for potential jury tomorrow (especially seeing as it’s supposed to be 87 degrees and humid and shorts are considered “inappropriate attire” for the courtroom). Hopefully my unkempt appearance and/or cranky political views will keep me from holding some poor sap’s life in my hands, but if I do have to serve, postings may be a wee bit spotty for a bit. I shall keep you all posted, since I know you all care, desperately.

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Mary Worth, 7/7/05

I’m beginning to think we’ve all treated Rita a little harshly. I mean, sure, she’s a belligerent, foul-mouthed drunk, but she’s got good reason to be: her daughter’s dead and she’s been kicked out of her apartment and forced to beg for help from someone she barely knows.

Mary Worth, on the other hand, is crazy. I mean, if I were in Rita’s shoes and Mary suddenly pulled this swan routine on me, I’d be all like, “Damn, girl, my life is f’ed up, but you are wack. Go on with your crazy-ass swan-having self.” I like the way that Mary is framed by the inky blackness of … well, whatever it is she’s standing in front of (is that the shadow of the door?) and surrounded by a glowing aura of widowish piety. And are those porcelain swans, or plastic, or … I mean, does she play with them in the bathtub or something? I’m getting more creeped out with each passing moment.

Do you suppose Dr. Jeff’s met the swans? I think I’d like to see the strip where he does, because I’d like to see him cry.

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I’m back from Cali but swamped with work — probably won’t have time to get a real new post up for a day or two. Still, for those of you who didn’t click on the link in the comments: faithful reader Mooncity had some free time and loads of talent and put together:

the adventures of … THE COCKTAIL!

Definitely one of the coolest bits of fanart ever. Moon, let me know if it’s OK to download to my site so I can add it to the “best of commentors material” that I’m gonna put together, you know, any day now.

Update: Uh-oh, I think we’ve overwhelmed Mooncity’s feeble Geocities account. Moon (or anyone else who has it): please e-mail me the graphic and I’ll post it here!

Update to the update: OK, I’ve got the graphic on my own hardy servers now — the link above should work again.