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Guys, just a very quick thank you to everyone who contributed to my Kickstarter. I managed to blow through my goal and am really overwhelmed by everyone’s support. Now I guess I have a novel to write! Stay tuned!

But you don’t have to wait any longer for this week’s comment of the week!

“J. Jonah Jameson’s look of unrestrained glee is quite possibly the best thing ever. You can almost hear him shouting insanity in the background. ‘Yes, YES! Restrain this son of a bitch! Rough him up! Rip his goddamn arms off a little more! MAKE MORE RANDOM REFERENCES TO PLAYS, OH MY GOD YES'” –Tophat

Or for the runners up! Very funny

“So Weirdly didn’t invent a time machine. Instead, all he did was invent a fucking flying car.” –Scott P.

“But no, Weirdly in his awesome sneakers, steam-punk goggles, stylin’ stash and top-hat has to put up with douchemaster Slylock Fox, whose rudimentary knowledge of basic animal functions allow him to (probably literally) ferret out the idiotic petty criminals in his world who don’t know enough about their own anatomy and basic functionality to even conjure a semi-plausible alibi.” –geekwhisperer

‘What happened to all that conflict?’ ‘Who knows? It melted away.’ Oh, man. That is just … that is a satisfying plot resolution. Josh, I hope you’re taking good notes.” –teddytoad

“Carolingian-era restauranteurs have a lot to learn about maximizing profit-per-square-foot.” –DaveyK

“Now that the Batman trilogy is concluded I believe it is time for Mark Trail to introduce us to Sheepman Begins.” –Shadow of the Hedgehog

“I know that newspaper deadlines make it difficult to make timely, relevant jokes about current events, but I still feel that Brad Anderson could have predicted when Election Day would occur.” –AndyL

Who’d bug us at 8 AM? Don’t they know only people with jobs are up at this hour?” –Doctor Handsome

I must thanks to all who put some cash into my tip jar! And we must give thanks to our advertisers:

  • Technomancer: The latest from best-selling author B.V. Larson!

To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot, and more about sponsoring this site’s RSS feed, click here.

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Comments of the week coming momentarily, but first: did you notice that I didn’t plug my novel in this morning’s post? Well, I am plugging it now. Don’t forget that you can pre-order and sponsor my novel, via Kickstarter! The awesome original art rewards from Sally Forth/Medium Large genius Ces Marciuliano are almost all gone, but there is still one left!

Also, we still have people aiming to put a reading party/private Josh performance together in the San Francisco, Vancouver, and New Orleans areas, and now there’s interest in doing one right here in Baltimore! So email me and I’ll put you in touch with interested parties.

Oh, and remember when I invited you all to re-dialogue this Korean cartoon?

I got plenty of hilarious responses, but this one, from faithful reader S. Stout, was closest to my heart, with its Mary Worth theme:

Panel one: “Here is the American comic strip, Mary Worth! I ran all over the city to find it!”

Callout: “<-Sundance Kid”

Panel two: “Excellent…a Wilbur storyline!”

“I live to serve you, honorable Boss!”

Panel three: You may leave now. I will be feverishly masturbating to this strip.”

Panel four: (whispers) “When Wilbur eats a plate of sandwiches all by himself…well, I just lose control.”

Haha, and now that you can never feel joy again, here’s your comment of the week!

“There’s also a salad around this bug. Where’s the steaming pile of trout innards and torn-apart whole mice I ordered?” –fillmoreeast

And your runners up! Very funny!

“The plugger guy got deer ticks from his mate. We’re one step from the first Pluggers STD joke.” –Droopy Says

“How could anyone (besides June, I mean) not love Rex in the final panel? ‘Not my department! Cheese and crackers?’ ‘She needs her first bra? How about some wine?’ ‘Pregnant? Ha ha! Have some of this wonderful apple pie!’ ‘Need to dispose of a body so that the cops can’t trace the evidence? Ahhh, my little girl. Now — now you come to daddy.'” –Black Drazon

“And Scott says ‘I love you, Nina Gaines,’ as he swiftly pushes the baby off the couch into the garbage for some much-needed lovemaking.” –sporknpork

Then…Vibrations! has to be the coolest narration box ever. It’d be great to see this type of box for all the non-action in Mary Worth. Then…Sandwiches! Then…Jazz Hands!” –Wave Man

“Look, the newborn infant wails inconsolably once exposed to genuine human affection! Certainly, she is the fruit of Nina’s loins.” –TheSilentG

“Notice the discreet placement of the big green pillow so that we cannot see that Nina is still naked from the waist down and dripping all over the carpet. Meanwhile, Scott’s hanging out, waiting for the breast feeding to start.” –Chaze126

“Please, can we have a summer of Gil getting whacked in the shins by 8 year olds?” –Nekrotzar

“I don’t think the guy with the mustache and cigar in panel one is actually involved with the action. I think he’s just some sort of omniscient narrator that the characters in the strip can’t see. I appreciate this service as a way of enabling the reader to keep track of the often-fragmented Gil Thorp storylines, but it shouldn’t be long before he’s saying, ‘Nah, I don’t know what the fuck’s going on, either. I think maybe they just lost the playdowns.'” –Pozzo

“Much as I am enjoying Lucha Libre and all its implied homoeroticism, won’t Phantom get all woozy exerting himself in a bondage mask with no air holes? Fifty shades of purple, yikes, that’s going to describe his complexion.” –Lynn

“I like how the other animals (even Max) are staring uneasily at Slylock, praying that he can determine the actual culprit. They all know SOMEONE’S taking the fall for this, and due process will not be a factor.” –Doctor Handsome

“A single drop of sweat rolled down Mister Wilson’s forehead. Don’t worry about it, a soothing voice said in his head. You’ve planned for everything. The tarps are burned. The grinder is at the bottom of the lake. Everything will be fine. Now finish the job. The Mitchells’ doorbell tolled like a funeral bell. Alice opened the door, her eyes rimmed with red. ‘I know you’re missing Dennis,’ Mister Wilson said in his most gentle voice. ‘I miss him too. I’m sure the police will find him soon. I brought over some of my famous bratwurst, though, so you don’t have to worry about cooking tonight.’ Braut-wurst, not brat-wurst, the voice said, but George was going to have his little joke. He was going to enjoy this moment for a long time to come.” –Voshkod

“I like how Nina’s Dad is holding the baby like a clipboard, or like it just peed all over his jacket.” –Calico

“Staying true to his craft, the stripey-shirted, beret-wearing artist is miming his way to safety.” –Dood

I must thanks to all who put some cash into my tip jar! And we must give thanks to our advertisers:

  • The Hole Behind Midnight: Royden Poole is having a very bad day. “… fast, profane, full of joy, deeply intelligent, and just a lot of damn fun to read.” –Colin McComb, author of OATHBREAKER. “… like the fevered brainchild of Warren Ellis and Kenneth Hite. Smart, dark fun.” ––Matt Forbeck, AMORTALS and VEGAS KNIGHTS.

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Guys, I am taking a brief break from plugging my novel to plug another project I’m involved in. You might recall Fusion, a project I contributed to where other (non-Korean-speaking) comics folks and I came up with new dialogue for some Korean comics. Fusion creator Ryan Estrada are offering a special promotional contest. Below is the strip that I re-dubbed, so to speak, shown in the original Korean.

Email me your own suggestion for what the dialogue should be. I’ll pick my favorite and the winner will get the $100 version of the Whole Story project — 1,600 pages of comics on an SD card, plus original art — plus you’ll get an e-book version of my novel when it’s done! (OK, I plugged the novel a little.) Enter now, for happy fun times! (Or just check out the comics you can buy for money and not your wit. Name your price!)

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