Archive: metaposts

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A sad note here before we launch into this week’s top comments: Eduardo Barreto, who took over the Judge Parker art duties from original artist Harold LeDoux, has passed away. His tenure at Judge Parker was cut short when he contracted meningitis a few years ago, and (unconfirmed) word is that his death was from complications from that disease. He had a fairly extensive comic book background, but to me he’ll always be the man who transformed Judge Parker from an odd-looking relic into a strip about hilarious sexy people doing hilariously boring things — and he got the better end of that team-up. Thanks, Eduardo.

And now, your comment of the week!

“A rolodex? Fancy elitist animal monsters! In my day we just scrawled the names of friends into the wall behind our letter-writin’ desks.” –bunivasal

And your runners up! Very funny!

“Dick Tracy puts a cunning plan into motion to learn the identity of his assailent. He waits until some bullets whistle past, then compares the grouping against his database of ‘Accuracy of Malformed Villain Attempts to Kill Dick Tracy’ (AMVAKDT). ‘Amateur’, he mutters, as he crafts a crude but gruesome death trap out of studio lights and gaffer tape.” –Lesser Whark

“If you’re like me — and I hope you’re not — you probably read that last panel as foreshadowing that Aunt May’s dessert would cause a gastrointestinal calamity to such a degree as could only be labeled ‘THUNDER OVER ASGARD!'” –Chareth Cutestory

“Pack of vicious eeevil wolves? Thousand-pound bear on the defensive? Mark Trail demands more carnage! Send in the housepets!” –Nate

“WTF is going on with Mary’s left hand in panel 2? Is she supposed to be whispering behind her hand? (If so, her hand is in the wrong place.) Is she pantomiming ‘phone’ because Bree’s not very bright? (If so, her hand is in the wrong place.) Is she trying to keep her brain from exploding and squirting out her ear? In that case, her hand might be in the right place.” –wossname

“The inter-species marriages have another impact on plugger mortality rates: diet. This can take several forms. Normally the carnivore-spouse attacks the herbivore spouse, eats her and then–because there is no one around to do the Heimlich maneuver–chokes to death on her bones. Marriages between competing species of herbivores are less dramatic in their lethality, but when it comes down to a grass versus grain diet, or leaves versus roots, usually one spouse crowds out the other out of the ecosystem, resulting in a slow death from starvation. Of course, when one spouse is an egg-layer death genarlly comes by spatula or skillet after the husband asks the wife to cook more of her own eggs. Pluggers do not believe in any form of birth control.” –Droopy Says

RMMD: “You go take care of Kelly! I’ll continue to commit felony assault!” –Cloudbuster

“Oh, Dolly. It’s PJ. Of course you need to tell him why. You’ve spent, what, four decades telling PJ why. ‘Why does Mommy cry some afternoons and drink cooking sherry?’ and ‘Why does Daddy sometimes look longingly over the fourth wall at Ted Forth?’ and ‘Why do I keep hitting myself?’ are probably a representative sample of all the whys Dolly has had to tell PJ over the years.” –Lily Sincere

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Let’s just jump right into our COTW this week, shall we?

“I really can’t blame Mary. That horrible kerning would be haunting me, too.” –Katie

Also, the runners up! Very funny!

‘How did you know I have a gun?’ ‘Because I know you’re not that happy to see me.'” –Chyron HR

“It’s funny, because both Anne and TJ can only use sex for evil — pure, pure evil! — so expect TJ’s employment to lead, inevitably, to the hideous two-headed Devil Baby subplot that Luann always seems to promise but never quite delivers.” –MikeyMike

“Mary may have forgotten her sweater, but she remembered her scarf! You could be otherwise nude, but if you’re wearing a scarf, you’re more than well-dressed enough for a fine restaurant or a term in the Senate. (This message brought to you by the Charterstone Scarfery circa 1974.)” –gkl

“Speaking of doodling, making up songs and playing interactive games, when has Mary last had sex with Dr. Jeff?” –Dood

“Crankshaft really is the right choice of a strip to focus on the importance of regular prostate checks, because when I think of assholes, Crankshaft is the first thing that comes to mind.” –Yusaku777

“RE: the hair. The reason it looks wrong is because you use hair to make a ponytail, so there should be less volume of hair underneath the ponytail. Here there isn’t, implying that the ponytail is actually a weave that MJ stuck onto the top of her normal hair. Also that she’s 12 years old in the ’90s.” –Moana

“Hey, now, sad sack receptionist, Westview is happiness-free.” –bunivasal

“Oh I can’t wait until the strip where Summer goes home and she and Les have a bitch off. She can piss and moan that Bull dared to make a joke and take any credit for her rehab. Les will whine about winning a free trip he doesn’t want to go on. It will eventually devolve into Les and Summer alternately yelling at each other ‘Dead Lisa’ and ‘Torn ACL.'” –Marc

“If you’re not reading this week’s Mark Trail with the Star Trek fight music running through your head, I pity you.” –Ed Dravecky

“I’m more interested in the unsaid storyline of today’s Apartment 3-G, where Margo can’t quite figure out what is stuck in Lu Ann’s hair.” –sporknpork

“Oh yay, now begins A3G’s grim, arduous death march back to the status quo. I, for one, was really enjoying the story of how Paul and Lu Ann got engaged, then prepared for a wedding, then broke up. It was even more heart-wrenching than the saga of how Tommie got a job as a songwriter and sort of forgot to do it.” –Snuggs

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Hi all! Your COTW momentarily, but first: as part of my awesome social media strategy, I am going to do a once-a-month reminders that I have a social media strategy! Apologies to everyone for whom this is old hat, but I figure the first COTW of the month is a good a place as any to let new and/or intermittent readers know that I have a:

I put the same material up on pretty much all of these, so really you should just pic the service you like best and subscribe to that one. Or none! I won’t be mad! (Just disappointed.) I’ll also link to new Comics Curmudgeon posts from each of these, so perhaps you will find them a good way to keep up with the blog?

Anyway, with that out of the way: your COMMENT OF THE WEEK!

“Know what would be super-smug of Mary? Calling the Smiths and offering to help find their daughter by correcting the punctuation on their sign. ‘Quotation marks without quotes? Questions without question marks? The first step to finding your daughter is to have standards.’” –Edgy DC

And your runners up! Very funny!

“Sophie reveals more of her robot heritage here, as evidenced by her allocation of resources. ‘Boy can see me? Present breasts. Boy cannot see me? Store breasts for later use.'” –Yusaku777

“So how many feathers do you figure are in that pie?” –Naked Bunny with a Whip

“Are there any 60s dance experts who can identify what J. Jonah is doing in that first panel? Is that, like, the Frug or the Watusi or something?” –Eli

Today’s Spider-Man demonstrates there is nothing quite as satisfying as taking a large dump when you call your boss with bad news.” –NoahSnark

“This is disturbing. Mary never lets ANYONE ‘lead the way’. Must be because she plans to hit Toby from behind. Oh, Toby, you never should have said the words ‘There are websites’. We all make mistakes. But that’s a serious one, Toby.” –Mustang

“I think Mary Worth isn’t so much handing down the commandments as she is branding them, ‘Mary Worth’s Thou Shalt Not Steal!’ Sort of like the Huffington Post — she’s just trying to get them out there to a broader readership, like hers, you know?” –The Diamond in the Window

“Check out Loweezy’s horrified expression when Snuffy tells her that he no longer has access to Farmer Johnson’s live chickens. She is clearly worried that, lacking his usual outlet, Snuffy will begin making sexual demands of her. Her nigh-hysterical relief upon his production of linked sausages gives us yet another unwelcome window on the sexual dynamics of their marriage.” –Lily Sincere

“I’m not sure if that panel 1 hand that has left Deke so shaken is supposed to be Gil flashing a Masonic hand sign or Kaz breaking the sound barrier as he karate chops the air, but either one should be enough to get the boosters to fall into line.” –Effluvius Erratus

“Also, I love Mr. Weatherbee’s reaction. He’s all, ‘Goddammit, way to ruin our refined afternoon tea with this talk about small human beings bursting forth from teenage vaginas.'” –Sugar Sugar

“Given how terrified Deke looks in the first panel, I’m pretty sure he’s reacting to Gil’s first sentence. ‘My loyalties are misplaced? He knows I’m a secret Al Qaeda operative — oh, wait, phew. He’s just talking about this high school shit.'” –Sock Puppet

“I think Prof. Cameron posting flyers of Toby pretending to be a missing 10 year old is in poor taste but I have to admire the detail they put into their kinky fantasy games.” –Krazy Kat

“I’d like to think the reason Paul’s dad has a copy of LuAnn’s marriage certificate is due to constantly using the Freedom of Information Act to slowly duplicate all government records, which will somehow aid in his family’s secession from the Union. ‘Oh good, my request for the White House’s water bills came in. Ha! These fools are digging their own grave!'” –Dennis the Two and a Half Menace

“Reading Gil Thorp is like having Asperger’s. I feel much smarter than everyone I see, but I don’t understand the emotions they’re expressing.” –Squeak

This wouldn’t be necessary if someone would take his tapeworm medicine.” –Walker of Dog

Thanks to all who put some cash into my tip jar! And we must give thanks to our advertisers:

  • So cute, so indie: ShanaLogic.com: 100% awesome handmade & indie gear designed by artists! You totally NEED:
    • Geek Chic
    • Hot Jewelry!
    • Yummy Goods
    • Guys Gear
    • Cute Plushies

    Support artists by shopping at Shana Logic & you’ll make the world a better place. Orders over $75 get FREE SHIPPING!

  • Alexandra Ivy: Bound by Darkness: Desire is the deadliest weapon. With breakneck action and sexy sizzle, paranormal romance star Alexandra Ivy doesn’t disappoint with another knockout novel in her highly acclaimed Guardians of Eternity series!

To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot, and more about sponsoring this site’s RSS feed, click here.

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