Post Content

Let us pause momentarily before we go all COTW to be sad about yet another newspaper comics cull, this time at the Denver Post. The Westword blog has a good wrapup, and Comics Riffs has the complete list. It is saddening but not surprising that many of the ones being pulled are new or at least new-ish (Frazz, Heart of the City, The Knight Life, Rhymes with Orange) and the ones that stayed are mostly legacy strips being drawn by the sons and grandsons of the creators (do I even need to list them here?) which at least set up this joke. If you’re in the Denver area, do contact the Post, politely, and let them know what you think!

And now, your comment of the week!

“Every 40 years, the hideous ritual begins again. The new Ziggy and all the animals eat the old Ziggy in a grotesque feast. The new Ziggy thinks he’s got the upper hand, but he doesn’t realize he’s the one suffering the cruel fate: 40 years of being Ziggy. At least the old Ziggy gets to die.” –Rantingdude

And your runners up! Very funny!

“As painful as I’m sure it must be, being kicked in the groin might teach the sheriff a thing or two, specifically that hats and rifles will go flying if they are not secured by straps.” –Charterstoned

“The reason why John Thrasher is living like a hermit up in the back woods now becomes clear: he was tired of being mocked for his dainty little ankles.” –Trilobite

“My dream for the current Spider-Man storyline is that ‘Big Boss’ is actually Spider-Man, who has grown tired of this whole ‘great responsibility’ gig, and just wants a few million dollars to help relocate him and his wife to Hollywood, so that he can save his troubled marriage by getting her a job on TV, so he can bear to look at her.” –Ian C.

“Framing Kenny Loggins for livestock theft? Look out, Sheriff. You just entered the Danger Zone!!!” –Doctor Handsome

“Mountain Man Moccasins, from J Peterman: You walk the high country alone, in retreat from you boot clad past. Your steps caress the ground, leaving no traces and taking orders only from your heart. Supple, oil-tanned, full-grain leather envelops your feet so your soles commune with the spirit of the earth, but if things get trying, as you knew they would, a swift kick to the nads of the establishment can deliver the message: ‘I wish to walk this land in peace, but these feet are still registered weapons.’ Men’s whole and half sizes: 8 through 13.” –Ned Ryerson

“While I’m thankful Ziggy isn’t going to make us suffer through a grating parade of self-congratulation à la Blondie’s 75th anniversary, I wouldn’t mind a crossover where the other depressing loser comic strip characters attend Ziggy’s party only to find themselves more miserable than they could ever think to imagine. Basically, I want to see Ziggy, the Lockhorns, and a few pluggers, all in the same panel, wearing party hats and forlorn expressions.” –Irischano

“I love the combination of smug and wild-eyed terror in the final panel. Ditto just seems so pleased with himself that he got his dad to share the intimate details of his love life. Lois is probably just tweaked, and Ditto sounds like a million cockroaches.” –MyUsernamesMud

“Are we missing the third panel where the kid slips on the immaculately polished floor of the stadium-sized kitchen and breaks his coccyx? Someone please tell me we’re missing that panel.” –Greg

“So let’s have that talk I’ve always wanted to have. You know how your body’s changing, Lu Ann?” –Dood

“Let me show you a couple dresses that I picked out, just in case I ever had a daughter of my own. Oh, and by the way, the doors and windows are sealed shut, so escape is futile.” –Scott Bot

“I missed the middle panel, in which Mary punched Liza in the neck.” –Squeak

“Of course, you’ll have to gestate in my uterus, LuAnn, but … that’s how it’s done.” –Mibbitmaker

Thanks to all who put some cash into my tip jar! And this is where we’d thank our advertisers — if we had any this week. To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot, and more about sponsoring this site’s RSS feed, click here.

Post Content

As we head into lazy summer, do enjoy this comment of the week, won’t you?

“Anyone else feel bad for Lu Ann here? Look at that innocent smile in the second panel. She … actually thinks this person is psychic. This person could tell her she’s a mongoose and she’d believe it. I guess Margo and Tommie are being economical, since a real psychic would probably cost a bit more than some crazy woman in the middle of the woods somewhere, and because giving Lu Ann a mind reading would be like reading War and Peace, except all of the words have been replaced with adorable puppy pictures.” –Tophat

And the runners up, as well!

“Isn’t Archie a little old to still believe in the Yearbook Fairy?” –Doctor Handsome

“I love how Tommie feels compelled to demonstrate to Lu Ann how to ring a doorbell, even though she’ll probably speak into it or try to eat it anyway.” –Walker of Dog

“I’ve always tried to avoid using public restrooms, but now I’ll be even more reluctant to use them since I’ve learned Meddlin’ Mary lurks there. Now I’ll be terrified that she’ll suddenly pop her head over the stall door and say, ‘Sounds like you could use some more fiber in your diet, dearie.'” –Perky Bird

“Mary’s contemplative look in the second panel is telling. She’s thinking, ‘Do I go with the salmon-squares-for-lunch private meddle or the pool-party public humiliation meddle that possibly ends in tears and suicide? Or we can stay right here and start with a private meddle that becomes public when others walk in. But then she’ll only be shamed in front of women. Men need to see this. Damn it, Mary, stop overthinking it. Just go with it. Like you did in the old days.'” –Johnny Knuckles

“I like how Lu Ann appears to be visibly star-struck in the second panel, even grasping her chest (or she’s having a heart attack, either one is good).” –Alan’s Addiction

“I like the way Mary got herself refreshments, but nothing for Liza. ‘Hi, I’ll have a black coffee. Her? No, she’s just here to cry, thanks.'” –Ellie

“Poor Daddy. When he was little, he had to watch his favorite TV shows when they were actually on. Um, just like we’re doing now. No, I’m sorry, this material is just not acceptable, even for us.” –Artist formerly known as Ben

“So just where are Jughaid’s parents anyway? He seems to be an orphan, unless ‘Aunt Loweezy’ and ‘Uncle Snuffy’ are just sly Hootin’ Hollar conventions winking at the fact that his parents are siblings.” –cheech wizard

Spider-Man: “Hahahahaha! I enjoyed your little joke. Now seriously, who’s actually a threat to your operations? Come on, I’m a busy hooded figure.” –Esther Blodgett

“Beyond Ms. Worth’s worthless (see what I did there?) pontificating, I’m more upset by the laughable perspectives going on with the coffee cups on the table. Mary’s is ROUND while Liza’s is ELLIPSOID. Artists could get away with this in Giotto’s time, but … I don’t know how to finish that sentence.” –Greg

“The true solution to the puzzle is FIRE U-BRAT. Obviously they are planting a ton of trees on a mountainside sloping down towards the city, and then setting a fire, using the slope to have the fire spread quickly and burn the city down with little warning to the people. Their picnic baskets will be full of roasted humans.” –John

“Hmm, let’s see: We have two partially-clothed bears engaged in a post-shrub planting conversation. I’d say the solution to this Jumble is: GROW OPIUM.” –Red Greenback

“The dippiness of the self-immolation in Funky Winkerbean is encouraging me to eat all the carbohydrates in my house.” –Katy

Thanks to all who put some cash into my tip jar! And we must give thanks to our advertisers:

• The Monster Doodle Book: This book is illustrated by you! The monsters in this book are waiting for you to finish drawing them. They can be scary, disgusting, cute, or weird. It’s up to you!

To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot, and more about sponsoring this site’s RSS feed, click here.

Post Content

Oh, look, I’m getting the COTW out on time for once:

“I don’t see any reason to assume that the liquid falling from Billy’s face is sweat; it could just as easily be tears. With a little imagination, and a willingness to use a red Sharpie on your monitor, it could even be blood.” –ratnerstar

And the runners up! Also hilarious!

“She’s clearly flashing back to her previous life. Pointy black hat, green skin, ‘These things must be handled delicately…’ It’s all coming back to her.” –Spiff Bereft

“Max Mouse may be stupid but at least he understands a suit and cape are inappropriate clothes for hot weather.” –nescio

“Also, ‘dog’s point of view’? Couldn’t B.C. come up with better lie to explain why he was looking at Thor’s balls? (OH MY GOD I STILL KNOW THOSE CHARACTERS’ NAMES. WHY DID I READ B.C. COMICS COLLECTIONS WHEN MY NEURAL NET WAS STILL FORMING AND AT ITS MOST RECEPTIVE? I COULD HAVE LEARNED FRENCH INSTEAD OF THIS POINTLESS CRAP!)” –Lorne

“I imagine that the discussion between writer and artist about portraying Gil’s horrifically unhuman-looking face in today’s second panel went something like this: ‘He’s angry, he’s serious! Draw more lines on his face to show that!’ ‘Uh, he already looks like an alien from Star Trek, so we cou–‘ ‘Shut up. More lines.'” –Alan’s Addiction

“Just look at how happy Petey is!! ‘Sweet, I’ll have a few hours of uninterrupted TV time, then when she comes home, I’ll have the perfect excuse to be whiney and mopey all night!!'” –pugfuggly

“We now know the mystery woman’s name is Susan, but nothing else about her. If they’d just added any reason to care, this would be a textbook example of how to build suspense.” –Some Guy

“Going by today’s installment, it would appear that these pluggers are very nearly if not actually in their nineties, which … the fuck? I would really like to know the precise cocktail of pharmaceuticals and Whoppers that enables these corpulent layabouts to achieve such astonishing longevity. Or is it just hugs from their grandkids? Their AARP-eligible grandkids?” –Violet

“Really, Luann’s ‘villains’ and ‘disreputable’ characters all seem a million times more likeable or at least interesting than any of the alleged heroes. I’d much prefer it if the de Groots and company all moved off to a compound where they could be obnoxious anal-retentives together and left the main strip to the people I don’t hate.” –commodorejohn

“But you have to admit that Brad is cool. Look how he stands there in the last panel with his hand in his pocket, just casually playing with his penis as he gets fired. COOL.” –Greg

“Also, Ziggy is dating his cat.” –Gold-Digging Nanny

Thanks to all who put some cash into my tip jar! And this is where we’d thank our advertisers — if we had any this week. To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot, and more about sponsoring this site’s RSS feed, click here.