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With exactly zero ado, here’s your comment … of the week!

“Dennis taunts his elderly neighbor by reminding him of the time in his blissful childhood when he was One, making no distinction between the self constructed for the outside world and his own inner dialogue. Dennis, on the other hand, both inhabits a world which is centered on himself and is self-aware to realize that the others are not like him in this regard. Menace level: existential!” –But What Do I Know?

And here’s your very funny runners up!

“All other strips are celebrating either the Super Bowl or Valentine’s Day, but I respect how Daddy Daze rejects the crass commercialism of these events. ‘Let’s make our own game of pretending we have no access to the outside world!’ says Daddy. ‘We’ll probably die!’” –Spunky The Wonder Squid

“For a strip supposed to be a heartwarming look at a divorced dad and his child as they contend with shared parental custody, all Daddy Daze really does to me is convince me that this guy should not have custody at all.” –ectojazzmage

“While Josh feels sorry for Hi, wondering why nobody wants to watch the Superbowl with him, I think there’s another side to this. We’ve seen Hi & Lois ‘watching the big game’ strips before, and I don’t remember it ever being a family activity. Usually, it’s Hi and Thirsty. But I guess Irma insisted that Dry January should stretch into February, and Thirsty doesn’t see the point in participating in male bonding rituals if he’s expected to do so with freaking soda, so Hi was forced into his second choice of spending time with his family, only to find out that actually, they’ve got their own (admittedly rather sad) plans, which they’ve probably developed over years of avoiding being in the living room while Dad and Thirsty are screaming at the TV.” –Horace Broon

“Come on, Rachel, pull yourself together. Slylock, however pompous he may seem, is not a doctor, and he has no real idea what to do about your necrotic tissue. ‘That’s an unlucky rabbit’s foot!’ is not a diagnosis.” –made of wince

“Of course Dagwood, from two cars back, correctly identifies the contents of the clown’s sandwich.” –Truckosaurus

“I’m shopping! I’m a real human being, with the wants and needs of an actual person! Thank goodness my needs can all be fulfilled commercially, either here or at the Happy Ending Massage Parlor!” –Buck Ripsnort

“Once again, I am just loving how impenetrable this strip makes itself to anyone but the most hardcore reader. ‘Sinatra’s Hideout,’ the dialogue box says. Is that a location, a statement or just a couple of random words to set the mood? Nevermind, let’s join our convoluted conversation already in progress!” –pugfuggly

“I realize Snuffy Smith has never been a strip to venture into the issues of the day (apart from a strip about a growing national ammo shortage maybe fifteen years ago), but it’s hard to miss the commentary on climate change. I don’t believe there’s anywhere in Appalachia where trees are in full leaf in the middle of February, at least during traditional climate, like the kind we used to have before rural electrification.” –Larry McAwful

“I choose to believe that Wilbur, having binged-ate Pierre’s leftover dog treats after the last break up with Estelle, has developed a secret taste for pet food and is using his goldfish as cover.” –Philip

“Give Leroy credit for having a water bottle and a yoga mat for his exercise regimen. He might not have the skill, but dammit he has the tools.” –TheDiva

“Namaste 250 feet away from me as ordered by a San Tobillo County judge, you freak!” –Old School Allie Cat

“What do you expect when you practice yoga at a voyeur friendly yoga studio? Wilbur had to muscle his way into position, shoving aside other stalkers and general pervs.” –Ned Ryerson

“This is like on of those thought experiments you learn about in economics 101 where a society’s whole economy is based on everyone doing each other’s laundry, only with drugs.” –Hibbleton

“The existence of animal-themed comic strips after the Animalapocalypse implies the existence of an animal Josh to mock them. Sorry Josh, no matter what you want, Slylock Fox will assign you a fursona!” –Ettorre

“Not to worry, the carpet is covered in PFAS! The kids might suffer neurological disorders, but that spill will clean right up!” –richardf8

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar, or back me on Patreon! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

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Folks! Your comment of the week in a moment, but first: If you’re in LA TONIGHT, February 10, you can get some more laffs from me, live and in person! That’s because my live comedy show, The Internet Read Aloud, back on its new day (the second Friday of the month) and a new time (8:30 pm) but the same place (The Clubhouse in Los Feliz) and the same shtick (jokes about the Internet). Here’s the Facebook event!

And now … your comment … of the week!

“I love how they invented a letter that’s EXTRA capitalized for Shepherd, to make it stand out from all the normal capital letters, because otherwise how is it clear that Dolly/Grandma means JESUS and not just some outdoorsy boredom-proof menial? I don’t mean I ‘love’ it, but I noticed it. Actually it kinda feels like cheating.” –Twinkles the Elf

And your hilarious runners up!

“We know what Dolly’s real game is here: If Jeffy ever learns to count past 5, he’ll be the smartest one in the family.” –BigTed

“The ‘ shepherd,’ of course, is what the Keanes call Carfentanil, a powerful sedative used to calm large animals. If it can help you handle an angry elephant, it’ll put Jeffy down for a good 24 to 48 hours.” –Voshkod

“Count Weirdly could prevent the next five Rachel Rabbit accusations by sending his big snake out to her clothesline. It looks hungry enough.” –Baja Gaijin

“There are countless volatile liquids that have a boiling point well below that of water so the boiling flask isn’t necessarily a sign that Weirdly is lying. Don’t mess with things you don’t understand, Slylock, and by that I mean basic chemistry.” –Spunky The Wonder Squid

“I got side-tracked by the purple thing. It’s a scrotum, right? Is it Weirdly’s own detached and semi-sentient scrotum, or is it an auto-scrotum? Either way it’s a fine example of Weirdly not consulting any kind of bio-ethicist at all.” –Lothar+of+the+Hill+People

“In today’s modern hyperconnected global economy, Hootin’ Holler’s whimsically ramshackle wooden fences are shipped flat pack from a Chinese gigafactory and its moonshine is distilled by a Luxembourg-owned conglomerate’s plant in Romania from bulk carrier loads of grain from the Horn of Africa. Eligible bachelors are the only thing still produced locally, and even that will change as developing economies rapidly upskill their fledgling hillbilly industries.” –Schroduck

“A resident of Hootin’ Holler pondering economics? Or a representative of the small Hootin’ Holler BDSM community? The latter seems more likely.” –nescio

“Today we learn that Dennis is less menacing than a lack of dietary fiber. This seems intuitively correct, and I will not question it.” –pastordan

“So we’re all agreed that Sophie is still beating the stuffing out the judge just off panel as his drug addiction is calmly explained, right?” –Old Man Shadow

“At first, I thought that small person was supposed to be a child; but now I realize he’s elderly Mickey Rooney, if Mickey Rooney were still alive and allowed to play baseball at such an advanced age. Watch that hip, Mickey!” –The Mighty Untrained FOOZLE

“Chance Billy would blatantly insult a grandparent: 100%. Chance Billy would know the difference between an upright and a grand piano: 0%.” –PetroDude

“That’s the 15th turnover for VT! How will they handle this? They’ve eaten all the apple ones, and the cherry ones are notorious for staining the uniforms!” –Peanut Gallery

“You’re a plugger if you can’t dress yourself anymore.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“The only reason that the women of Hootin’ Holler would waste valuable bread by tossing it to ducks would be to lure them close enough for the women to grab them, wring their necks, and take them home to serve for supper. Today’s strip can be read to mean that for tonight’s supper the Smiths sadly will have no bread to eat, but on the positive side they will finally get enough fiber.” –seismic-2

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar, or back me on Patreon! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

Post Content

Folks! Your comment of the week in a moment, but first: If you’re in LA on February 10, you can get some more laffs from me, live and in person! That’s because my live comedy show, The Internet Read Aloud, back on its new day (the second Friday of the month) and a new time (8:30 pm) but the same place (The Clubhouse in Los Feliz) and the same shtick (jokes about the Internet). Here’s the Facebook event!

And now … your comment … of the week!

“Let’s say, and why not, that you need to calm an excitable Sunday lunch crowd at the local senior center. Gasoline Alley shows you the way: get them started on regional dialects, and you’ll have them distracted right up to tri-ominos time. 10/10 reader service, Gasoline Alley, no notes.” –pastordan

And your runners up! Very funny!

“I dunno about this being very un-menacing; burying a member of her household who her father wouldn’t is why Antigone was executed, after all.” –Tom

“The most significant feature for determining the location of Gasoline Alley is looking at the range of the black bear in America which is fairly limited. Given the bear has heard southerners say ‘bed’ we can further limit the possibilities to the contiguous areas of black bear habitat that reach into the American south. Assuming this bear hasn’t crossed up through Canada, that pretty much limits it to an eastern inland corridor between New England and the south. Northern West Virginia, Pennsylvania, or New York. Now, having done all this work and research we reach the inevitable follow up question: what is wrong with me?” –BananaSam

“‘When suddenly…’ in Judge Parker? Nope. I don’t believe it. –Where’s Rocky?

“Good idea! Once most of your athletes are out for the season with back and leg injuries you’ll save a lot of money on uniforms and transport.” –TheDiva

“I’m not sure how snowmen make ‘homemade ice,’ but the one on the right seems to be squatting.” –nescio

“Crock is right! In this alternate universe in which the Algerian war lasted well into the 2020s, France needs her soldiers not just to impose colonial dominance through the bayonets, but also to justify it to world through sick dances on TikTok!” –Ettorre

“They’re taking great care of her at the hospital! I mean, I assume. Is St Joseph’s in network with your provider? Well, let’s say adequate care, then.” –pugfuggly

“Order up, because you just got a job, like I was just talking about! I have the power to influence time and space, yet I still think vaping and smoking are the same deal!” –made of wince

“So Estelle doesn’t realize she’s committing the worst sin of First Date Etiquette by going on endlessly about her ex. Did she forget to renew her subscription to Cosmo? This is rookie-level.” –jp

“The Hayes Code and the Comics Code Authority probably give Gil Thorp wedgies because its ‘criminals’ are so milquetoast. ‘A pinch of grit is okay,’ they tell the strip as they hold its head in the toilet and flush. ‘You can depict actual crimes!’ they yell, shoving the comic into a locker.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“(A plugger gesturing towards the edge of reality) OH FOR PETE’S SAKE (A plugger will often exclaim this, even though he has no idea who Pete is. His universe is only a small box, containing nothing but himself and a featureless lavender void.)” –Dan

“In retrospect, that was an obviously unprofessional and pointless thing to do, and the general is fully justified to be upset with me. Look, I’m running out of ideas for reasons to keep appearing on Wednesdays, and unlike that little infant creature in Hi & Lois I can’t get by talking about the weather every single week.” –jroggs

“Perhaps ‘Comic Sans’ is looked upon by true comic purists the same way AI generated art is, a shortcut that costs traditional hand-lettering artists their jobs, thus it should not be spoken.” –Philip

“He said I’d embarrassed him in front of the entire command structure, and that he was now a laughing stock at the Pentagon and PERSCOM, not to mention at Corps and Division HQ. He said that my tits would only take me so far, and that this was it, I could walk my cute ass right out. Of course, I had my phone recording the whole thing, so I’m taking early retirement with a cool two million in my pocket from the harassment settlement. Play your cards right, Blips, and the old fool will say something that gets you bumped up to Captain and transferred to CENTCOM down in Tampa.” –Voshkod

“Hey film crew, there is LITERALLY A TALKING BEAR just right behind you. He uses actual speech balloons and everything, go nuts!” –The Otter Limits

“Holy crap! Actual action payoff to a storyline in Judge Parker! I never thought I’d see it! And to think, it only took almost a year’s worth of strips to get to our thrilling climax of Sophie instantly destroying the unstoppable meth empire by beating a helpless old man to death.” –ectojazzmage

“Didn’t Cookie used to be a chain smoker before the days of content warnings on everything? It seems like today’s strip would be an ideal way to reference that. ‘Now that I can’t taste anything, I’ve got back to the unfiltered Pall-Malls. That hit of tar and nicotine is a pale replacement for food, which I only vaguely remember tasting as a teenager.’” –Larry McAwful

“That’s how I won the match in Paris. I won it so decisively, they named a magazine after it! You’ll love the celebrity lifestyle features.” –Peanut Gallery

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar, or back me on Patreon! Thanks to all for your support and readership!