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Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/13/04

For my money, Rex Morgan has the best art of all the soap opera strips. It’s very cinematic. The “camera” is always swooping around extremely dramatically, as it does here, from far to near. I like how the close-ups are always at strange angles, often cutting off part of the characters’ faces. This dramatic perspective is appropriate for the current storyline, in which our heroes are trapped in a cave that’s menaced by rising floodwaters, but trust me, when the strip takes weeks to discuss medical malpractice insurance, the art is exactly the same.

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Mary Worth, 7/12/04

This strip contains what may be the first use of the phrase “Wilbur makes an overture” in the history of the English language. I can’t stop reading Mary Worth, just like I can’t stop looking at a train wreck. The petty shenanigans of its plotlines, combined with its glacial pace, mark it out from the other soap opera strips. I remember an unpleasant dinner party that once lasted six weeks.

This storyline is still in its embryonic stages. Surely a monkey wrench will be thrown into this budding romance, or this plot will be even duller than time that the 12-year-old kid let the air out of the slightly cranky professor’s tires.

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Non Sequitur, 7/11/04

I used to really like this strip when I was in college. Generally it was what it said on the label: a sort of Far Side-esque collection of weirdness, maybe a little more cynical.

Then Wiley Miller got politicized. Unfortunately, it wasn’t in an exciting, motivating way; instead, it was in a condescending, preachy way. The fact that his politics tend to lean my way just depresses me more — the last thing we need are more scolds.

“Obvious Man” epitomizes everything wrong with the current state of the strip. As an editor, I suppose I should love the current installment of his annoying adventures. But here’s my professional opinion: correcting grammar in professionally printed matter is important. Correcting it in casual conversation is annoying.

I do like the enormous pants on the young dudes, though.