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Queasy-making precociousness

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/23/11

Ha ha, if you aren’t made profoundly uncomfortable by the preternaturally intelligent Morgan-child declaring her intention to make a teen boy her love slave, then you probably are a much better person than I am, and yet here we are! Anyway, I’d like to believe that I’d have an easier time viewing this strip innocently if (a) it weren’t clear that June is focused on keeping Niki’s lovin’ for herself and (b) panel five didn’t make Sarah’s collagen injections so obvious.

Marvin, 10/23/11

Ha ha, well known drug/sex addict Lindsay Lohan has shown up in Marvin, in toddler form! This is actually good, for two reasons: first, Lindsay has not to the best of my knowledge crapped in her pants in public lately, so her appearance here can only elevate this strip’s level of humor; and, more importantly, she has in the past sued people who have come up with thinly veiled baby versions of herself, which means that maybe Marvin will be bankrupted by legal fees.

85 responses to “Queasy-making precociousness”

    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:24 pm [Reply]

    I’m just annoyed that we’re probably not going to see June in a bikini. What’s the point of having her on a boat?

  2. Uncle Lumpy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:27 pm [Reply]

    Boy, it’s a rough Sunday when two strips stiff us on pool parties.

    Can we sue?

  3. BigTed
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

    Looks like June has read the recent New York Post article in which a former stripper uses fishing as a metaphor for finding a rich older husband. But precocious Sarah, having noted the age and income disparity between her parents, is clearly way ahead of her. She’s already training herself to land “a big one,” even if he’s just a teenager who’ll have to be thrown back after flopping around in the Morgans’ rarefied air for a while.

  4. ironflange
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:33 pm [Reply]

    “Lindsay Lola?” Naw, it’s gotta be a coincidence, no need to get lawyers involved.

  5. Danny
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:34 pm [Reply]

    Josh has somehow neglected to mentioned the shell-shocked, horrified, thousand yard stare of the Miller Family in Marvin’s throwaway panel. My guess? They’ve just realized how. much. poop. they have to dispose of.

  6. BigTed
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:35 pm [Reply]

    So Marvin’s daycare is so awful that’s it’s actually used as court-appointed punishment for juvenile offenders?


  7. Bill Peschel
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    Lindsay’s working off her punishment at the L.A. morgue, so the daycare from hell is an appropriate place for not-Lindsay-Lohan to serve her sentence, since “Marvin” is the place where humor goes to die.

  8. BigTed
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:44 pm [Reply]

    Also, how momentous is that Marvin is meeting the star of diaper commercials? The nearest comics equivalent would be Garfield running into Chef Boyardee.

  9. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:48 pm [Reply]

    BG&SS 5404 days. Is there no justice? Etc.

  10. bbofun
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:49 pm [Reply]

    It’s been a veeeeeeeeerrrrryyy long time since I went fishing, so maybe I’m wrong but-

    “You’ve got a fish on!”?


    Has anyone ever actually said that? Other than Margo when Queen Bee shows up in her suit-o-fish, I mean.

  11. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:51 pm [Reply]

    @BigTed (#3): That retired stripper wouldn’t happen to be the notorious Lotsa Stuff, the Baltimore Bombshell, would it?

  12. Janni P., Denmark
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:52 pm [Reply]

    Just hours ago, I checked this page and the last post was the CotW. I wake up for a nap, and there are suddenly two new posts. You’re amazing, Josh! :D

    I don’t comment often, but I just want to tell you that you make a difference – I am unable to work and have to take strong painkillers- even then, I have to spend most days in bed, with chronic fatigue and pain. But every single day, I check in to read your posts. Thank you. :)

  13. bats :[
    October 23rd, 2011 at 4:56 pm [Reply]

  14. Uncle Lumpy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:04 pm [Reply]

    @Janni P., Denmark (#12):

    Protip: if you’re in pain, cut back on the Marvin. Seriously, that shit ain’t helpin’.

  15. Rixter
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

    MW: Yes, Gina, I hope you’ve prepared yourself for Bobby’s “games.”

    A3G: Paul! Of course not! “Creeped out” is a lot different from “ashamed.”

    FW: Yes, it’s just a block north of Loss-of-Bladder-Control Court.

    BG&SS: Gas? Groceries? For a community that relies on footpaths and donkeys for transportation and macaroni (without cheese) and roots for sustenance? Nah, they’ve just gotten into the poppers again.

    CS: “Home remodeling.” “New addition.” Pam has pointedly avoided the term “home improvement,” because any improvement of her home would require reducing the number of residents to one.

    MT: Wow, what a difference a day makes. Yesterday, it’s Peaceable Kingdom, a valley teeming with wild animals of every kind. Today, it’s albatrosses, all albatrosses. As far as you can see, albatrosses all the way down.

  16. Red Greenback
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:11 pm [Reply]

    That toy robot and pacifier are so going to be fashioned into a makeshift drug pipe.

  17. Janni P., Denmark
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:11 pm [Reply]

    Also, to make sure your comic is up to today’s standards, make sure you cut away from the scene EXACTLY when the most exhilarating action you’ve had in weeks happens – like a whiny teenager catching a fish!

  18. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

    beer commercial featuring mega-squee, frolicking kid goats, and beautiful people.

  19. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:31 pm [Reply]

    RMMD It’s a sign! Mom’s Bible, which she carries everywhere, is open to Gen. 1:20, and then Sarah gets a fish on! Let us prey.

  20. The Gringo Kid
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:32 pm [Reply]

    Marvin: Better Lindsay Lola than Baby GaGa, as the latter would definitely mean a lawsuit.

  21. The Gringo Kid
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:33 pm [Reply]

    Queek! Great game last night! What an ending.

  22. seismic-2
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:45 pm [Reply]

    @The Gringo Kid (#20): But in Marvin, that would be “Baby Ca-Ca”.

  23. Some Guy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:49 pm [Reply]

    ASM: The last time we checked in on Peter he was musing that he did have to stay cooped up in the apartment. Presumably the TV broke down since then.
    FC: From the “Billy’s illiterate and can’t draw, and someone’s bitter about that Disney job” files.
    Hagar: And in the “slapped-on throwaway panels” dept: two panels of Helga handing Hagar his shield, followed immediately by him picking it up from opposite her.
    JP: Okay, that’s the international intrigue storyline aknowledged, now back to sub-Luann teen drama!
    MW: “You haven’t changed! You look great! Except you still have that weird thing growing out of your head! Haven’t you seen a doctor about it?”

  24. Some Guy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:56 pm [Reply]

    Good lord, today’s Crankshaft is a roiling turmoil of emotions, all of them negative and petty.

    Pam wants to go to the home remodelling show. She knows Jeff doesn’t want to, but she’s going to passive-aggressively push him into going anyway.

    Jeff doesn’t want to go to the home remodelling show. But rather than say so, or simply accept that sometimes it’s a nice gesture to go somewhere your wife wants to go, he decides to up the passive-agression stakes by inviting Ed. Because Ed is a huge asshole, and taking him will spoil it for everyone.

    Ed doesn’t want to go either. But more than that, to judge from his expression in the final panel, he’s also well aware he’s been invited not as a kind gesture, but purely because his son-in-law believes his presence makes people miserable. He will go anyway, because it’s an opportunity to make people miserable.

    As Josh has said, the strip should be renamed Jesus Christ, Ed Crankshaft And All The Other People In This Strip Are Assholes.

  25. Some Guy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:56 pm [Reply]

    And once again, I forget the preview button.

  26. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 23rd, 2011 at 5:57 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#11): Lotsa Stuff? I know her! Just ask me!!

    June’s got a fish-on? Sounds like somebody’s about to go lakeside!

  27. TheDiva
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:01 pm [Reply]

    Marvin: It’s a sad state of affairs when Lindsay Lohan jokes are an improvement from your strip’s normal content.

    C’shaft: Don’t scowl like that, Cranky. He learned all about spreading misery from the master, after all.

    Luann: Did…did Tiffany just say she was looking for a good male escort service? Because that’s what it sounded like.

    MW: “You haven’t changed!…No seriously, you look exactly the way you did when you were fourteen, right down to that samurai topknot thing on your head, and it’s really freaking me out. Check please!”

    SM: “I can’t stay cooped up in the apartment any longer!” Damn, the stress of this whole Big Boss thing is affecting Peter deeper than we realized!

  28. Trillian
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:05 pm [Reply]

    Marvin: I’m creeped out by the title panel.

  29. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:10 pm [Reply]

  30. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:14 pm [Reply]

    he was called Andre The Giant for a reason. o_O

  31. odinthor
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:31 pm [Reply]

    @Janni P., Denmark (#12): Chronic fatigue and pain? Ye gods, that would be like having nothing to read but Love Is . . . and the Thorax panels from 9CL. Hang in there! (–Especially if you can supply us with Tuborg and/or ample smørrebrød…)

  32. wossname
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:44 pm [Reply]

    I should have noticed this on Saturday morning — but Saturday’s MT panel 2 looks like what would happen if somebody spilled a drawer full of literal clip art of giant animals onto the page.

  33. wossname
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:46 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#30): Many years ago, my brother met and actually shook hands with André the Giant (in his Québecois persona of Giant Jean Ferré). He was big, I hear. Real big.

  34. Uncle Lumpy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:49 pm [Reply]

    @Some Guy (#24):

    As Josh has said, the strip should be renamed Jesus Christ, Ed Crankshaft And All The Other People In This Strip Are Assholes.

    Hmm, subtly ambiguous. However as far as I know, He has never appeared in the strip. I mean, prostitutes and tax collectors sure, but a Guy’s gotta draw the line somewhere.

  35. Janni P., Denmark
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:50 pm [Reply]

    Lumpy: Haha, admittedly, Marvin doesn’t make it much better, I guess, but I’m just happy someone like Mary Worth isn’t around to try and “help” me! By the way, the thanks goes to you too, of course, for keeping my CC-addiction fed when Josh isn’t around! :) I haven’t had room in my disability payment to support you economically lately, but I am hoping to be able to do so one of these months – you think you could keep a bird band around for me? :)

    Odinthor: Thank you! And Tuborg and smørrebrød to all, of course! :D

  36. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:54 pm [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#13): Thank you, bats :[ ; in these dark days of ridiculous romantic reunions, you give us hope.

    @Some Guy (#24):

    As Josh has said, the strip should be renamed Jesus Christ, Ed Crankshaft And All The Other People In This Strip Are Assholes.

    Ooh—and thank you for this wonderful argument for the continued existence of the Oxford comma!

  37. Rusty
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:55 pm [Reply]

    Sunday Hi & Lois: Somebody got a comic sans font for his birthday.

    Sunday FW: I’m afraid my life will be reduced to this if I, like Funky, stop drinking. You would think he still had enough energy to put a foot up Cody’s ass.

    Marvin: A strip whose demographic has no idea of the existence of Lindsay Lohan.

  38. Braniff
    October 23rd, 2011 at 6:57 pm [Reply]

    @Some Guy (#23): DISNEY? I think this panel (and the Family Circus) prove that even the Hallmark greeting card people have enough sense to reject anything by Bil Keane or his offspring; the Hallmark people know their audience wants something with BITE.

  39. Nehemiah Scudder
    October 23rd, 2011 at 7:01 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#26): Ok, Mr. Bones. Do you know Lotsa Stuff?
    (ducks, and runs)

  40. Liam
    October 23rd, 2011 at 7:04 pm [Reply]

    MW-Winning, Bobby? Judging by the expression on your face in the first panel you look more scared that Gina is back in your life than pleased.

  41. Borborygmy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 7:18 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#26): Lotsa Stuff? I know her! Just ask me!!
    Is it true that she and Bobby Kennedy had a thing going before Jack ran for president, but the family made them break up? I’ve always wondered.

  42. commodorejohn
    October 23rd, 2011 at 7:23 pm [Reply]

    @Braniff (#38): Actually, Glen Keane, the supposed inspiration for Billy (not in name, not in head size, so…uh, I dunno,) is a talented animator with a long and pretty kickass track record with Disney. Believe it…or not!

  43. Rixter
    October 23rd, 2011 at 7:33 pm [Reply]

    @Some Guy (#23): @TheDiva (#27): MW: Right! “You haven’t changed since we were 14 – before you reached puberty. You’re remarkably clueless, you still don’t have breasts, and with that hair you look like a stage extra in the Mikado. I, on the other hand, have matured into full manhood – I’m now 6’2″, I shave twice a day, and I’ve added 75 pounds of muscle. Which makes our whole relationship really creepy. Wanna go up to my room?”

  44. Comcis Fan
    October 23rd, 2011 at 7:37 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: These are family comics. Is it really appropriate for a mother to be talking to her preteen daughter about her big fish-on?

    S4th: Two Batmans. Is that code for Hilary and Faye going as Robert Smigel’s Ambiguously Gay Duo?

    FW: Another day, another pun, and another miserably bitter Westview denizen.

    Zits: Time to free Jeremy from his conventional mobile phone and his conventional electric guitar.

  45. Baka Gaijin
    October 23rd, 2011 at 7:54 pm [Reply]

    @Comcis Fan (#44) on Sally Forth: I’m pretty sure you can change “Ambiguously Gay” to “Obviously Flamingly Gay” because the duo stuffs the costumes’ codpieces with grapefruits and kielbasas to represent body parts they’ll never have.

  46. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 23rd, 2011 at 8:05 pm [Reply]

    Funky WinkerStringbean — I’ve seen this “joke” before, but I forget where!

  47. Buck Ripsnort
    October 23rd, 2011 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

    @Danny (#5): You’ll notice that Marvin him(it)self shares that thousand-mile stare. My guess it has something to do w/ demonic possession, in which case, my sympathies to the devil!

  48. pingo1387
    October 23rd, 2011 at 8:57 pm [Reply]

    “Lindsey Lola”– of course she can only elevate the humor, since it’s already hit rock-bottom.

  49. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 23rd, 2011 at 9:06 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#39): Say, what I don’t know about Lotsa Stuff ain’t worth knowing!

    @Borborygmy (#41): She was collecting the set, if you know what I mean.

    @commodorejohn (#42): I saw him at a canned event promoting POCAHONTAS before it came out. I broke into a conversation he was having to ask him just one question: did any of the Keane kids ever draw any of the “Billy” strips? The answer, unsurprisingly, was no. “Dad regarded those as just about the hardest to draw,” he said.

  50. Flummoxicated
    October 23rd, 2011 at 9:13 pm [Reply]

    Our reunited teenage lovers have gone all thought-bubbly in Mary Worth.

  51. JudoThrowToy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 9:22 pm [Reply]

    I’m sure that crazy First Amendment will get in the way before Lindsay Lohan can bankrupt Marvin, but like winning the lottery, at least it’s fun to think about.

  52. Jessy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 9:48 pm [Reply]

    When I first read Marvin today, I was thrilled that the storyline seemed not to be focused on defecation. When I realized that the new kid was a poke at Lindsay Lohan, I longed for mountanous piles of stinky Marvin-poo. Either a strip pokes fun at politics and current events or it doesn’t. It does not change in midstream. It’s unsettling.

  53. Scott Bot
    October 23rd, 2011 at 9:51 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#9): There’s a bigger injustice in the world – the number of weeks since Cassandra Cat has made an appearance in Slylock Fox. Bob Weber, Jr., why have you forsaken us?

  54. Jessy
    October 23rd, 2011 at 9:54 pm [Reply]

    @bbofun (#10): And the thing is, there’s plenty of room for the words “your line.”

  55. Vince M
    October 23rd, 2011 at 10:06 pm [Reply]

    @Scott Bot (#53): As a compensation, she’s in today’s “My Cage” rerun, and it is superb throughout.

  56. The Bolem
    October 23rd, 2011 at 10:07 pm [Reply]

    I’d never heard of the eTrade lawsuit, since 90% of my knowledge of Lindsay Lohan comes directly from Robot Chicken, where it belongs. Has she tried to sue them too?

  57. Poteet
    October 23rd, 2011 at 10:28 pm [Reply]

    MT per yesterday — Not to polish my lapel too prominently, but I’ve had winter scenes near my house that included deer, squirrels, an occasional shrew popping up from under the ground, and at least a dozen kinds of birds, all at the same time and peaceable. Of course that wasn’t as dramatic as moose, beaver and giant ducks, but the fact that herbivores tend to get along reasonably well is not exactly a mystery. So I call bullshit on Amazing Wild Paradise, and my biggest hope is that someone will finally figure out how to color the damn ducks properly next week. But probably not.

  58. Poteet
    October 23rd, 2011 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#57): Sorry, that should have been “damn waterfowl,” since I see now that geese are among the victims.

  59. Poteet
    October 23rd, 2011 at 10:45 pm [Reply]

    PV — Most of the male ‘dos in this strip are okay with me, and even Val rocks that pageboy about as well as as a pageboy can be rocked. But Gawain…buddy, you need a new stylist. Seriously.

  60. Baka Gaijin
    October 23rd, 2011 at 11:33 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#57): You had a shrew? How did Momma get all the way to Iowa?

  61. Lenoxus
    October 23rd, 2011 at 11:38 pm [Reply]

    At some level, Lindsay Lohan’s PR team must have seen that the eTrade ad didn’t really have a “thinly veiled version” of her, because their case rested on “Lindsay” (the name of one of the ad’s baby characters) being culturally synonymous with “Lohan”. The ad had nothing else that would point to Lohan specifically, or even celebrities in general, unlike the Marvin strip.

    Anyway the commercial in question is awful, imo, especially the salient “milkoholic” bit. It might have worked if “milk:babies” was remotely loke “alcohol:adults”. The usual thing done in that situation (especially in children’s cartoons trying to tell a story about drugs) is to show a candy addiction, which is what I half expected from the Marvin strip. But babies as young as the one in the eTrade ad don’t even eat much solid food. In fact, they mostly… drink milk. So having a “milkoholic baby” is as deeply inane as an “oxygen-snorting human”.

  62. seismic-2
    October 23rd, 2011 at 11:51 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: “Really? Aren’t you younger than Daddy?”
    “Yes, Dear, but I’m his ‘Trophy Wife’. You, on the other hand, aren’t anybody’s Trophy anything, unless there’s an award for worst outcome of finding the condom box empty.”

  63. Alison
    October 23rd, 2011 at 11:59 pm [Reply]

    Okay, first let me say I’m no Lindsay Lohan fan and I never have been. That said-Cripes, Tom Armstrong, what an easy target. You gonna shoot fish in a barrel next?

  64. exapno
    October 24th, 2011 at 12:02 am [Reply]

    Luann: Obviously left out the condoms, the ‘massager’, and butt plug

  65. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 24th, 2011 at 12:06 am [Reply]

    Sunday funneez

    RMMD: It’s notable when Spider brings Kelly to the kind of deep-woods cabin where Jason Voorhees likes to do his holiday chopping, and that’s not eve remotely the creepiest thing going on in the strip.

    M-Dawg: Someone apparently thought that it was a good idea to show Marmaduke’s tongue snaking out in the last panel. That person was/is/shall remain very much mistaken.

    JP: Oh Marie, don’t you know that if you ask questions like that they just might get answered?

    Luann: Not surprising that Evans puts toilet paper in Tiffany’s purse, considering all the strips he’s drawn where she’s on the can.

    PV: “Sampling the local treats.” Nice.

    H&L: “You’re father is just trying to recapture the days when he was an adult head grafted to a small child’s body.”

  66. Borborygmy
    October 24th, 2011 at 12:07 am [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#49): So, Old Man Muffaroo, we know you’re a good friend of legendary Baltimore plus sized exotic dancer, Lotsa Stuff. Does she has any idea what memorabilia for her act is going for on Ebay? A signed poster featuring the platypus routine recently went for, well, of course you know.
    We know she’s an artist first, and money doubtless means nothing to her. Naturally we respect and admire her integrity, but if perchance she needed funds for some personal charity, perhaps you might mention us? We could do business.

  67. Poteet
    October 24th, 2011 at 12:30 am [Reply]

  68. Droopy Says
    October 24th, 2011 at 12:42 am [Reply]

    Dick Tracy: It’s like a Big Boss scene in Spiderman, except the art is good, the characters are interesting and you know something will happen before the end of the week.

    Mock Trail: And with that startling announcement, Moses McDuck leads an exodus from Hoser Heaven.

    Cranky: The storm before the clam? Given that “clam” can have sexual connotations, this implies some nasty foreplay is in the offing. Any chance Cranky will get caught in the middle and misspeak the safeword?

    FW: I loathe Batiuk’s characters less when they’re properly sedated.

    Phantom: So everyone knows that the post-match truce depends on having el Jefe and his rival shake hands in public, yet nobody knows that they’re also the mucho-masko fighters? One inanity leads to another.

    Pluggers: Damn those Pluggers, why haven’t they told the rest of the world that permanents aren’t permanent?

    Zits: I always wondered why the father wears that Han Solo vest. Now we see that he comes by it honestly.

  69. Tony
    October 24th, 2011 at 12:50 am [Reply]

    I’d love to know what the really tiny book is that June is reading in the last panel. It looks to be about the size of “Quotations of Chairman Mao.”

  70. Baka Gaijin
    October 24th, 2011 at 12:58 am [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#65) on Luann: If that were Jughead’s bag, you see all the same stuff plus a hoagy, a dead fish, and a small Archie doll. If it were Dagwood’s bag, you’d see only a couple huge submarine sandwiches, a variety of condiments, and a strong purgative. I fear to see what’s in Sarge’s bag.

  71. Poteet
    October 24th, 2011 at 1:16 am [Reply]


    MT — “Someone lives in this beautiful valley! This beautiful, beautiful valley, where the water keeps shifting between green and blue and the waterfowl bellies keep shifting between ludicrous green and bizarre brown…dammit, Kelly, did you drop acid in the canteens again??”

    MW — “See, I TOLD you if we actually asked her to join us, she’d decide for sure to go somewhere else for lunch. You were worrying for nothing.” “Maybe so, but never EVER do that again!”

  72. Frank Lee Meidere
    October 24th, 2011 at 2:06 am [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#36):

    Hmm. While I am an avid and vocal advocate of the Oxford comma, I feel Josh’s proposed title is more of an argument for ensuring separation of an ejaculation from the main thought by use of an exclamation mark. (Heretical aside: as a child I was always amused in church when we sang “Christ the Lord is Risen Today,” which was listed in our sheets as “Christ, the Lord is Risen Today.” This struck me as possibly being a far more accurate rendition of what the apostles must have said at the time.)

  73. Frank Lee Meidere
    October 24th, 2011 at 2:27 am [Reply]

    Mon. Oct. 24

    Between Friends:

    Gak! Am I a success?”

    No. No you are not.

    MT: Why is that duck so surprised someone lives in the beautiful valley?

    Pardon my Planet: Well, this is wonderfully dark, twisted, and subtle. Kudos.

    Phantom: “One lie leads to another,” says the man who wears a freakin’ mask to work!

  74. Uncle Lumpy
    October 24th, 2011 at 2:28 am [Reply]

    @Frank Lee Meidere (#72):

    Interesting article in the WSJ on just this point — looks like a job for the exclamation comma!

  75. dale
    October 24th, 2011 at 2:39 am [Reply]

    @bbofun (#10):

    “You’ve got a fish on!”?
    Has anyone ever actually said that?

    Yes. Haven’t heard it in decades, but I haven’t had to go fishing in decades.

  76. TheTJ
    October 24th, 2011 at 2:59 am [Reply]

    Man, celebrity life is pretty wierd. What must it be like to know that there are at least two baby versions of yourself making fun of the real you. It’s like some sort of extra-abstract college film.

  77. This Guy
    October 24th, 2011 at 3:07 am [Reply]

    9CL: This comic has disappeared behind an event horizon of juvenile pettiness, preventing its component pixels from ever again reaching my Darkgate page. What a tragedy. [*]

    DtM/Momma: Soon, all of the older comics will consist solely of the word “TEXT” repeated over and over. Octogenarians will proclaim it the funniest thing in the history of mankind.

    PMP: Larson did that joke over 20 years ago. Old jokes in new comics.

    RMMD: Please let it be a pack of inbred hillbillies who want to make clothing from Spider’s hide… in other words, Hootin’ Holler.

  78. Baka Gaijin
    October 24th, 2011 at 5:39 am [Reply]

    In case anyone missed it, the awesome Metapost is up.

  79. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 24th, 2011 at 6:00 am [Reply]

    @coach (#76), @coach factory outlet (#77):

    “The Hotel Comics Curmudgeon… where coaches check in, but don’t check out!”

  80. Vince M
    October 24th, 2011 at 8:17 am [Reply]

    @coach factory outlet (#77): fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap!

  81. Minarets
    October 24th, 2011 at 8:32 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#71): MW: *adore*

  82. bobbaloo
    October 24th, 2011 at 9:32 am [Reply]

    in panel six is that June Morgan’s version of Billy Crystal’s version of the Walter Huston dance?

  83. Snuggs
    October 24th, 2011 at 2:27 pm [Reply]

    Clearly the Marvin team prepared for litigation in advance by making sure the character looked absolutely nothing like Lohan whatsoever. Maybe that’s what his family looks so damn nervous about in the first panel. “We’re such a high-profile media outlet, there’s no way she’ll miss this! This is madness!”

  84. greghousesgf
    October 24th, 2011 at 4:03 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#70): Aren’t a hoagie and a submarine the same thing, just called by different names depending on whether you’re from Boston or Philadelphia?

  85. Khaos4k
    October 24th, 2011 at 10:08 pm [Reply]

    I’m looking forward to next week when we find out that Lindsay Lola is actually Richie Rich in drag.

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