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The course of true love never did run smooth

Dennis the Menace, 11/11/12

“Not right now, Dennis. You see, I’ve been very, very naughty and now I have to sit here in this corner until your Mom comes back with the carpet beater for my spanking. Say, why don’t you walk down to the candy store and buy yourself a treat? Here’s a twenty — take the long way back.”

The Better Half, 11/11/12

OK, this is some kind of Six Differences thing, right? Dress, earring, meal, hair, chair, … dammit! One thing that never changes is Harriet’s stunned reaction to her friends’ romantic complications: I betcha boring old Stanley is looking pret-ty good to her right about now.

I’m also a little intrigued about the redhead’s idea of catch-and-release sport-dating. It sounds like something Henry and Alice Mitchell might want to check out.

Curtis, 11/11/12

The most expressive characters in Curtis are the animals. From faithful basset-hound Trinklet to the Evil Dr. Horsehead, the animals are invariably more sincere and deeply engaged than all the heavy-lidded humans sleepwalking around them. I mean just look at Unnamed Sheepdog racing from despair through alarm to ecstacy in about three seconds there — who wouldn’t want to come home to that?

Still, I don’t think boyfriend is playing this at all well. Maybe the passion of the lovers’ reunion was judged too intense for a family strip? Maybe boyfriend is just putting off introducing Naomi to his new wife Kashmala, waiting in the car? Or maybe he caught a glimpse of Curtis and Barry and decided on the spot that wife and family was not the life for him?


– Uncle Lumpy

112 responses to “The course of true love never did run smooth”

  1. Poteet
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:57 am [Reply]

    So Curtis wants to have his face covered with human drool whenever he walks through the door? Bleargh.

  2. Droopy Says
    November 11th, 2012 at 2:04 am [Reply]

    Spiderbland: A hot chick is hot for him, and Kraven wants to play with Spiderboy? The only way this could get more absurd, maybe, is if Kraven throws Showgirl Sherry at Spiderschlemiel, and he catches her just as MJ Parker arrives.

    Flunky Whatever:So this is how Batiuk celebrates Armistice Day: seven frames of a delusional non-character pretending he’s in a U-boat, followed by a car wash scene. (Jeeze, Batiuk, actual humor would have involved two frames of subamrine daydreaming, then a frame of Asshat, Creepy Les and some other wanker smirking out their unwise cracks, followed by Delusional Driver Guy calling them ballast and tossing them into the suds.)

    Dick Tracy: Today begins an investigation of the Crime Of The Centuries (this and the last one): who stole the humor from Gasoline Alley? I’m guessing it some ugly, misshappen creature with a weird name. I’m looking at you, Boog, and that’s something I never thought I’d do!

    Jugs Parker: Not even bothering to hide the homoerotic meanings, are we? Fine, just don’t go into detail about where Bubba wants Avery to hang his hat.

    Family Circus: That’s . . . actually funny, having the melonheads act like real kids. Keane Enterprises should do that more often.

    Pluggers: Poor Brookins. As the current generation of Pluggers dies out, he has to learn the high-tech terminology used by the younger Pluggers. Why couldn’t they settle for candlestick phones and crystal radios like his generation did?

  3. Alfred E. Neuman
    November 11th, 2012 at 3:25 am [Reply]

    Curtis— Unca Lumpy, how could you, of all people, forget the most famous Curtis animal of them all, the very sincere and deeply engaged Cuss Skunk?

    I know, you were just being modest.

  4. Dale
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:04 am [Reply]

    MARK TRAIL

    Scientists AND computer models?
    The girls who hand out brochures at hardware and software trade shows really aren’t computers or models.

  5. Rusty
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:22 am [Reply]

    Curtis: In which Barry makes a promise to take their relationship to the next level.

  6. Cloudbuster
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:32 am [Reply]

    RMMD: Haha, Wilson thinks young people these days admire people with actual accomplishments. The cast of Jersey Shore says hi.

    ASM: What army? Um, the army of security guards that will throw you out because you’ve crashed the stage of one of the paid performers.

    A3G: I realize I’m probably supposed to be rooting against evil, backstabbing Evan, but Margo so richly deserves every humiliation he can visit upon her.

    FW: Batiuk visited the ComicsKingdom comment section: “I love this strip! I love this artist! I love this comic! GET FUNKY!!!”

  7. Clint Brawny
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:35 am [Reply]

    Is the Dennis the Menace artist that limited? Why does it look as if Dennis is standing less than one yard away from his father as he throws that football?

  8. Dale
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:53 am [Reply]

    MARK TRAIL

    is / are ? Either way, future generations are less concerned than Honey Badger. They aren’t born yet.

  9. Baka Gaijin
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:57 am [Reply]

    This’ll be great. Spiderman thinks his skinny ass can stop the massive Kraven from tossing him out on his spider butt. Ha ha ha!

    Pluggers leave their cell phones in the bathroom because they…they…ugh. The thought of Pluggers dropping plugger-turds while on the phone is disgusting.

    Oh damn. Why couldn’t Mr. Wallet visit the Dick Tracy-verse about 2 years ago under the Locher reign? He could have been ironically killed by a case of falling wallets.

  10. The Ridger
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:29 am [Reply]

    9CL: Oh, snap. Brooke’s joke got scooped by Zits!

  11. Liam
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:29 am [Reply]

    MW-”If I help him I’m really helping myself.” Spoken like a follower of Mary Worth.

  12. gleeb
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:38 am [Reply]

    Slylock: Once M. le Comte’s shrink ray makes him, or more likely, Max small enough to slip between the bars, the fox plans to reverse the machine. He will be set upon my the watchful snake and walking scrotum monster.

    Phantom: He wears the mask so no fish will rat him out to the Rhodian junta.

  13. Baka Gaijin
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:46 am [Reply]

    @gleeb (#12): Walking scrotum monster? [checks strip] Oh, God, you’re right.

  14. bbofun
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:14 am [Reply]

    Quick snark, before I go to play a biblical patriarch (and pour coffee) (no rest for the wicked) (or actors) (one in the same, pretty much)-
    9CL-A) As mentioned by @The Ridger (#10):, Brooke should check out that Zits to see how to tell this joke FAR more economically, and better.
    B) Brooke, you beefwit, “I wonder what…) IS an inquiry.

    ASM- I’ve decided to read Kraven’s lines, which I used to imagine in a sort of Christopher Lee-as-Rasputin voice, as Will Ferrell playing Robert GOU-LET!

    FW- Batiuk, wisely, realizes his audience won’t recognize that Harry’s “in a submarine”, so he has to add in “boy, these SUBS really echo”, even though it makes even less sense than the rest of the strip.

    RMMD- This is more like it! Hey, it even worked in a reference to our vets! (Okay, that’s stretching it- but it’s gonna be fun seeing Honey work her whiles on Rex, as June seethes, and Rex tries to figure out what’s going on.)

  15. Chaze
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:16 am [Reply]

    ASM – Yeah, I’m an old timer and I admit it, but used to enjoy the times Spidey had superpowers and actually used them. Now, it’s yak yak yak. Shut up and throw down or get out.

    JP – I STILL think Bubba’s got a man crush on Avery, or else he would want Avery to be HIS partner and for Avery to make an honest woman of Bea, not vice versa.

    MW – It appears that Dawn fed Wilbur a meal laced with peanuts and that he is very allergic to them. His neck is about to swallow his head.

  16. Chaze
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:21 am [Reply]

    9CL – Expect Edda and Amos to perform Victor Borge’s bit on punctuation. However, instead of making sounds for each punctuation mark, they will assume a sexual position. Can’t wait to see the semi-colon!

  17. BigTed
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:23 am [Reply]

    Is that the first look we’ve ever had of the Mitchells’ entire house? I don’t know what’s going on in there, but blacking out all the windows seems a little extreme.

  18. seismic-2
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:42 am [Reply]

    Curtis: A soldier returns from a tour of duty in Afghanistan, and he hasn’t lost a limb, been kidnapped and held in a cave for years, been declared legally dead by the military, had the Army lose the paperwork for his benefits, or brought back a war orphan whose parents were killed by a suicide bomber, but instead he is greeted by a dog that amuses us with a series of amusing expressions of happiness? My god, Billingsley, have you learned nothing at all from this week’s lecture series in FW???

  19. lynn
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:47 am [Reply]

    Am I the only one disturbed that Naomi White seems to be Diane Wilkins, leading a double life? But who can blame her. Also, I think the dog is just a family-friendly way of illustrating Naomi/Diane’s ‘welcome home’ greeting.

  20. lynn
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:48 am [Reply]

    Specifically, panel 8.

  21. lynn
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:50 am [Reply]

    @Clint Brawny (#7): That’s as far as Dennis can throw. And Henry is a really poor receiver.

  22. CanuckDownSouth
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:50 am [Reply]

    re: Curtis, maybe she knows he’s coming and they decided to let the dog have his reunion and get it out of his system – I’ll bet it was inspired by Emmitt the Great Dane’s “surprise reunion” video

    (double-levelled up ubuntu and my name stuck around? those are some tough cookies)

  23. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:05 am [Reply]

    AD, LaCuc, NAoQV: *golf clap*

    Doons: *golf clap, extended*

    Frazz: physical comedy ftw.

    Zits: tries for the Shel Silverstein approach, and fails mightily.

    SG: guest-starring a much better cast of characters.

    Lio: is for Poteet!!!!

    SBp: I Lol’d.

    JP: “”a place to hang his hat” Like a rack, or something.

    DT: wait, WHAT?!? that’s a guest star I was not expecting.

    PMP: o wow. nice and anvilicous.

    Ghost-who-jumps-to-conclusions-and-has-to-swim-back.

    RwO: *applaz*

    SFx & MT both feature polar bears.

  24. Black Drazon
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:47 am [Reply]

    Today on Dick Tracy: the man who can kill anyone meets the man who can never die! They’re probably going to team up or something, but if we can get these two at one another’s throats we might just be able to send the newspaper industry off in the flames of paradox.

  25. Dartpaw86
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    The Mitchell’s house seriously had too much to drink.

  26. TheDiva
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:55 am [Reply]

    Happy Veteran’s Day to all you service-’Mudgeons out there!

    Better Half: So this strip exists, huh? Good to know that there isn’t any newsprint going unwasted.

    Curtis: Well, up until the implications of incestuous homosexual pet play, that was rather sweet.

  27. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:57 am [Reply]

    Aw, what fun is this? Daily Ink is screwed up, and now there’s no comics to make fun of!

    I will tell you, however, that the new-fangled Tintin movie my son is watching on the idiot box is just as nausea-inducing on the small screen as it was in the theater…

  28. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:58 am [Reply]

    comics related loldog.

    Hammy has been taking lessons from Guard Duck.

    a spot the difference not likely to show up in SFx. (nsfw)

    The ikkle raccoon and the movable rock. (you need to see this, Poteet.)

    corgsqui, 9 wks and 11 months.

    corgi strut.

  29. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:04 am [Reply]

    @TheDiva (#26): Yes, thank-you to Nehemiah Scudder, among others.

  30. bad wolf
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    I love it when Uncle Lumpy does the updates, since we get to see some new strips and not just another “Barney Google”.

  31. whozitwhatzit
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    MW: Huh.. It appears that Dawn is using mannequin parts to practice hand gestures she learned in Italy.

  32. TheDiva
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    C’shaft: It’s funny because Crankshaft is a horrible sociopath who has every intention of spreading misery wherever he goes!

    FW: I thought there was a character in this strip who’s a veteran, and who had an entire story arc about he had been shortchanged and forgotten after he returned home. But I must be mistaken, because a very important serious writer like Tom Batiuk wouldn’t dream of just using a character for his own personal soapbox and then ignoring him entirely.

    Luann: That Tiffany is so self-absorbed, she thinks people actually care that the school’s serving e. Coli tainted meat.

    MW: Dawn just summed up her philosophy in a pithy quote, and used her friendship with Jim to illustrate what a wonderful and giving person she is. Watch out, Mary; the apprentice is about to supplant the master.

    Phantom: “Rhodian Junta” would be an awesome name for a Bollywood star.

    SM: In your case, an overweight part-time security guard would be army enough.

  33. seismic-2
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:31 am [Reply]

    DT: Damn, I had been hoping that the next guy to get shot in the arm, have his collarbone shattered by an ax, be set on fire by having hot ashes dumped on his head, and then perish in a hail of gunfire would be Slim Skinner.

  34. remmy
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:36 am [Reply]

    FW: I never thought I would say this but… let’s cut Batiuk some slack today. It’s not a mope fest of Wally having flashbacks or Corey messing up in basic training. We are not being lectured in a comic shop or by driving by a “rundown” neighborhood. There is no Les in sight. I actually found this one humorous today. Good job Tom – no snark from me.

  35. TheDiva
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:41 am [Reply]

    @remmy (#34): Fair enough–but I still find it ironic that Batiuk followed up a whole week of “just because they’re comics doesn’t mean they can’t be serious so take me seriously goddammit” with a strip about a grown man playing submarine in a car wash.

  36. AdHocGrip
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:56 am [Reply]

    The Better Half When I read (in error) “Eating is my favorite sport” then catch ‘n release was edgy and hilarious. “Dating…” not so much.

  37. Johnny Q
    November 11th, 2012 at 11:20 am [Reply]

    Curtis: “How did you get home from Afghanistan so soon?” “I deserted.”

  38. This Guy
    November 11th, 2012 at 11:40 am [Reply]

    H&J: Hey, Bentley, did you know that most cartoonists write scripts instead of copy-pasting from an encyclopedia? Sounds crazy, but it’s true!

    Luann: “High school is war. And high school… high school never changes.”

    SMBC: What kind of insane person doesn’t want Girl Scout cookies?

    // No, don’t tell me about dietary restrictions.

    R==R: Here in 2012 we call that “putting iTunes on shuffle.”

    Momma: Judging by Francis’s 90-degree angle to the TV, there must be one hell of an exciting wall over there.

  39. Dartpaw86
    November 11th, 2012 at 11:48 am [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy: Man, Dennis the Menace really made my day. I don’t think Josh think of a funnier caption for that. (If anything he’d probably say the exact same thing)
    Thanks man :)

  40. Chaze
    November 11th, 2012 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    @pastordan, lazy professor (#27):

    Dan, mine weren’t emailed, but were available when I logged on thru my app.

  41. Poteet
    November 11th, 2012 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

  42. NoahSnark
    November 11th, 2012 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

    You’re home, you’re home! Guess what human? I ate poop today!

  43. Poteet
    November 11th, 2012 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

    PV — I don’t know why Sir Roger wants to dress like a yellow jacket, but it’s certainly eye-catching.

  44. Dale
    November 11th, 2012 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    FUNKY

    A submarine doesn’t “release” its ballast.
    A hot air balloon ….

  45. Poteet
    November 11th, 2012 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    9CL — Geez, Brooke, there’s also eating and sleeping.

  46. Baka Gaijin
    November 11th, 2012 at 12:38 pm [Reply]

    @NoahSnark (#42): That’s a little TMI, Noah.

  47. debussy fields
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:01 pm [Reply]

    MW– Thank God that we get to see Wilbur’s right hand in today’s last panel (at least I think that’s his hand on Dawn’s shoulder, but who knows with this poorly-drawn strip?). All the other panels seem to indicate that fat-necked Wilbur has joined Jim as a member of the One-Arm Club. And by the way, would someone please go up to Dawn just once and muss up her hair a little bit? Or is that a bi-color helmet she’s wearing?

  48. Poteet
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

    CRANKSHAFT — By Grabthor’s hammer, I didn’t find this joke funny the first seventeen times, either.

  49. Inkwell
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

    Family Circus – Darn it, I snickered at this one. There goes all my curmudgeon cred.

    Funky Winkerbean – Then this ruined my mood. The characters can’t even smile when they’re having fun. They physically can’t. Think about that.

    Slylock Fox – The solution is too small to read. It’s like there is no solution, making Sly’s detached grin even creepier. He’s high, isn’t he?

  50. Dr. Excommunicated
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

    It is clear to me now that witnessing his parents perverted sexual ageplay is the root cause of dennis behavioral issues.

  51. This Guy
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

    @Dr. Excommunicated (#50): “In my opinion, this child don’t need to have his head shrunk at all. Juvenile delinquency is purely a social disease.”
    “Hey! I got a social disease!”

  52. Jim Beam
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    Zits: Blatant rip off of the children’s book “The Giving Tree”.

  53. Daniel
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

    Better Half Maybe the panels are all Chernoff faces, explaining both their basic similarity and their radically different characteristics.

  54. bats :[
    November 11th, 2012 at 1:52 pm [Reply]

    @Droopy Says (#2): re FC: I loved this one unironically.

    @Dale (#4): oooh…is Mark going to do a Sunday feature on Booth Babes/Bimbos?

    And no comments here so far? Sure, she’s pulling a Thorax, but still!

  55. Horace Broon
    November 11th, 2012 at 2:15 pm [Reply]

    JP: “I’m rescuing Avery from Bubba! I’m impressed by Bubba’s taste in decor! Now I’m angry with Avery!” I realise it’s hard to know what an appropriate reaction to this reversal of expectatio would be, but Bea’s coming across as a bit ADHD here.

    RMMD: Go ahead, try and rustle Dr Rex from Mrs Rex. I’m sure she could use the laugh. Now if Junior were to try and rustle Dr Rex, that would be a different story…

    SFox: In the words of another mad scientist whose petty schemes are foiled by an animal in a hat “Why did I even put that button there?”

  56. bats :[
    November 11th, 2012 at 2:20 pm [Reply]

  57. Calico
    November 11th, 2012 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

    @Alfred E. Neuman (#3):
    Does Conrad make Cuss Skunk sit in the corner when he utters too many “shits” and “fucks”?

  58. Patrick
    November 11th, 2012 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

    Not only is Dennis’ dad waiting for his spanking, but he’s also the one who catches when they play close to the house. ;)

  59. Calico
    November 11th, 2012 at 2:33 pm [Reply]

    @Patrick (#58):
    And then Alice says, “We’re so wacky.” ; P

  60. Liam
    November 11th, 2012 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

    Foxtrot-Jason, you should have been here last year. It was all ones down the line. It was perfect.

  61. commodorejohn
    November 11th, 2012 at 3:16 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#51): If anyone in the funnies needs head-shrinking, it’s them Circus kids, I tell ya.

  62. Seth Snarkadder
    November 11th, 2012 at 3:21 pm [Reply]

    MW – “You know what they say… A good friend is cheaper than therapy.”
    Yeah, right. And they also say, “You get what you pay for.”

    Crankedshaft – This asshole can’t live forever, can he? Although I suspect that even then, there would be a comic strip. What would a Dead Crankshaft strip be like?

  63. The Ridger
    November 11th, 2012 at 3:22 pm [Reply]

    @Liam (#60): Jason’s messing with his mom.

  64. Chip Whittle
    November 11th, 2012 at 3:56 pm [Reply]

    Mark Trail: Is… is Mark Trail scruffy in that first panel, second row, there? I don’t know the world anymore.

  65. Poteet
    November 11th, 2012 at 4:13 pm [Reply]

    MT — So is Mark Trail a serious, informed conservationist who has wacky dreams about a strange place called LoFo, a big-eyed wife named Cherry, and a young mutant named Rusty? Or is Mark really living in LoFo and going off on weird journeys allegedly related to conservation journalism and meanwhile having desperate dreams about being an informed conservationist who is taken seriously?

  66. Inkwell
    November 11th, 2012 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    I’ve never read The Better Half much, so now that I realize what it’s about, this will sound dumb, but…

    I thought the character with the black hair was a dude. Until I saw the title panel, I assumed today’s comic was “him” speed dating. Then I realized that in panels 2 and 4 she’s got breasts; I don’t know what she’s got in panel 3.

  67. tallyHO
    November 11th, 2012 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    @Clint Brawny (#7):

    Is the Dennis the Menace artist that limited?

    I know what you are getting at. And, yeah, the composition could have been shown further away instead of close up like that.

    However, the way that panel is set up shows you two important things, the window and the way Dennis is holding the ball. The next panel just makes a ton of sense, given the way the arc is made. He just heaved it like some kids would.*

    But, as for how “limited” the artist is, just look at the shirt and the dress, and that kooky view of the house. Details, beautiful details.

    *funny thing is that there was a strip not long ago where he was telling the doctor he had a pitching arm. So, he thinks he can toss a baseball but he can’t throw a football. So, it goes for a hyperactive little kid.

  68. Gladly, the cross-eyed bear
    November 11th, 2012 at 4:46 pm [Reply]

    @Jim Beam (#52): Ya think?

  69. tallyHO
    November 11th, 2012 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

    @Inkwell (#49):

    Totally!

    The grin on Shylocks face is that rare proof that he has a mouth.

    As for the solution, I had to download the image, englarge it so it could still be sort of legible but not abstracted pixelization, turn it upside down….I mean, c’mon! When is technology gonna catch up to the designs of comic strips.

    There should be some way of looking at a comic strip so that you can:
    1) pull it close to your eyes so you don’t need to squint;
    2) turn the image upside down, if needed, to read upside down text;
    3) easily attach your favorite ones to refrigerators or cubicles;

    Once technology cracks that problem then the eggheads can work on some way to allow you to spread the webpages out on a coffee table that still allows you to put your coffee cup on it. And, maybe eventually, allow us to reuse webpages we are tired of by, say, wadding them up and tossing them in real fireplaces, to substitute kindling (without damaging computers, of course)

    Get to work, Poindexters!

  70. Jamoche
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:17 pm [Reply]

    @Inkwell (#66): No, you aren’t the only one. Also I couldn’t figure out why “he” had an axe sticking out of his head.

  71. Anachrosaurus
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:46 pm [Reply]

    JP: I love Avery’s leer in the last panel: “A place to hang both my hats…”

  72. John C Fremont
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:47 pm [Reply]

    Now this is The Better Half that I remember as a kid. I don’t ever remember liking it, but that’s how it looked. Note the absence of axes sticking out of Harriet’s head.

  73. Alison
    November 11th, 2012 at 5:57 pm [Reply]

    “Luann”: This is the most blatant “Let’s make Tiffany look like the world’s most horrible person” strip yet. Tiffany compared high school to war! Tiffany hates veterans! Tiffany hates America! Tiffany hates freedom!

    I mean seriously, if it was Luann doing a report about war she wouldn’t be any less offensive. She’d probably say, “I have a quasi-boyfriend in Australia and I miss him sometimes, which makes me feel bad, and war makes people feel bad, so like, I understand war.”

    “Family Circus”: Heh. Angry Jealous Jeffy needs to be in this strip every single day.

  74. Droopy Says
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:00 pm [Reply]

    @Dale (#44): A submarine blows it ballast. You’d think that would come automatically to Batiuk.

  75. Stroker Ace
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:18 pm [Reply]

    DtM – Alice Mitchell: wife, mother, dominatrix

  76. Calico
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:18 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#61):
    This FC is rather disturbing, I must say.
    I will rejoice the day when the poor little PJ baby will get his comeuppance. How, I’m not sure. Ideas, anyone?

  77. Nehemiah Scudder
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:38 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, lazy professor (#29): Well, gosh, thank you Pastor Dan.

    // I only did it because chicks dig a guy in uniform.

  78. Elk Meadow
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:39 pm [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#18):

    Curtis and NAOQV and Baldo are the only three Veterans’ Day strips I found. Doonesbury today feature’s veterans, but I think it’s more for Valentines Day.

  79. Elk Meadow
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:43 pm [Reply]

    I was going to snark about how neither FW nor Crank did a Veterans’ Day strip, and then realized that not honoring veterans today could be the best thing that Batiuk could do. Otherwise, if he’d tried, it might have been worse than today’s Luann.

  80. Elk Meadow
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:45 pm [Reply]

    @remmy (#34):

    I agree.

  81. Dave Dahl
    November 11th, 2012 at 6:45 pm [Reply]

    Here is some insight re comics in newspapers needing more space:

    http://www.pjstar.com/blogs/mindingbiz/x794467234/Dont-give-up-on-the-Sunday-funnies

  82. Red Stripe
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:01 pm [Reply]

    Henry Mitchell, you have officially lost your balls.

  83. Erich Clapton
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#77): Not me. I did it because I got to go to all kinds of strange places and do bad things to bad guys. That’s the fun of it all.

  84. Here Come the Judge
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:09 pm [Reply]

    Judge Parker: Anybody wondering how Peaches will get along with her new step-mom, Bea? Or maybe wondering just how tall Bubba is? I’m guessing about six foot eleven.

    Good thing they have Sam along- to draw up the contracts, and to collect is undeserved reward…

  85. Nehemiah Scudder
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:10 pm [Reply]

    @Erich Clapton (#83):De gustibus…

  86. Jamus The Bartender
    November 11th, 2012 at 7:40 pm [Reply]

    Luann: “Pittsville…..shit. I’m still only in Pittsville. Out there, the cheerleaders grow stronger, while I get softer. Cheerleader’s idea of a furlough was some rice, a little rat meat, and maybe some hairspray if they were lucky…”
    Hmm….been there, done that…let me try this one…
    “MY NAME IS LT. TIFFANY. AND YOU ALL OWE ME A DEBIT OF ONE. HUNDRED. CHESS CLUB. SCALPS!!”
    Yeah, that works.

  87. I speak Jive
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:15 pm [Reply]

    FC – If this was really true to life, Jeffy would be pinching the baby to make him cry. (In a spot that doesn’t show, of course.)

    Crankshaft – If Batiuk would check his thesaurus, he would discover that “tiresome” is not a synonym for “funny.”

    A3G – I’m going to go out on a limb and predict that when the best dressed lists are released at the end of the year, none of these people will be on them.

  88. TheDiva
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:31 pm [Reply]

    @Seth Snarkadder (#62): Zombie Crankshaft would lurch around, muttering incomprehensibly and causing terror and destruction wherever he goes…in other words, there would be no measurable change.

  89. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:36 pm [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#77): Well, I complimented you because you’re the only vet I know on this board, now seeing Erich Clapton as well.

    But FWIW, chicks dig a guy in my uniform too. Just ask Mrs. Pastor.

  90. commodorejohn
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:37 pm [Reply]

    @Here Come the Judge (#84): Oh man oh man, add Peaches ‘n Bea to the list of Woody Wilson guest character spinoff strips I would kill to read…

  91. chadk
    November 11th, 2012 at 8:53 pm [Reply]

    suprised that Family Circus didn’t make today’s post. It was a real glimpse into the violent hierarchy that maintains social order in the household. Is Billy merely imitating the parenting methods used by his father and mother? Does PJ recipricate the threat of violence down upon the family dog, the only creature he believes to be beneath him on this totem pole of abuse? when will the cycle of hatred and violence within the Keane Kompound end? WHEN??

    Also, more than anything else, today’s Curtis strip just reinforces the idea that in Curtis’ world, Crackers be crazy and Whitey is wacky, regardless of species.

  92. Seth Snarkadder
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:27 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, lazy professor (#89):

    But FWIW, chicks dig a guy in my uniform too. Just ask Mrs. Pastor.

    Or Maybe Mary Carson…
    “You’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, Ralph de Bricassart,” she said.

  93. Kirk
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

    YOU LIKED DENNIS THE MENACE TODAY, LUMP! ADMIT IT!

  94. Peanut Gallery
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:44 pm [Reply]

    @pastordan, lazy professor (#27): The weirdest thing is that Blondie is still available from comicskingdom.net. Did they just forget to switch that one off?

  95. Peanut Gallery
    November 11th, 2012 at 9:49 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#51): “Take him to a social woiker!”

  96. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:32 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#94): As I’m sure you know, Blondie runs on autopilot. I’m convinced that someday it will activate the cyborgs to rid the world of those pesky humans that created it…

  97. pastordan, lazy professor
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:35 pm [Reply]

    @Seth Snarkadder (#92): My sister thinks that’s the greatest miniseries EVAH. But before you get all into “Squick, are you sure your name isn’t Jim?” territory, please know that I weigh in the neighborhood of three Richard Chamberlains, so no family resemblance there.

  98. Uncle Lumpy
    November 11th, 2012 at 10:56 pm [Reply]

    @Kirk (#93):

    YOU LIKED DENNIS THE MENACE TODAY, LUMP! ADMIT IT!

    I LOVED DENNIS THE MENACE TODAY AND I HAVE AN ALICE MITCHELL JONES AND I DON’T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!

  99. Laura
    November 12th, 2012 at 12:09 am [Reply]

    Curtis: The Boston Globe is one of the papers that cuts out the first couple panels on Sunday strips, so the Curtis strip was particularly puzzling, given that it seemed to involve Diane’s secret boyfriend returning from Afghanistan.

  100. Erich Clapton
    November 12th, 2012 at 12:23 am [Reply]

    @Nehemiah Scudder (#85): Yeah, there’s that. That’s why some of us jump out of perfectly good, flying aircraft and live on our wits. That’s why, later, when I went to OCS, I opted for the Navy. Less of that tying yourself into trees to sleep, the constant availability of a dry, warm rack, and warm food. Lack of sleep? Bah, you can sleep when you’re dead.

  101. Sgt. Stoned
    November 12th, 2012 at 12:26 am [Reply]

    MT: Not a bad strip today, Mr. Elrod, except…just what is causing the permafrost and the ice caps to melt? Can we say “global warming” or even “climate change”? And what is causing global warming, Mr. Elrod? Can we say “humans burning fossil fuels like coal, oil and gas?” Yes, I know, Mr. Elrod that if you get too explicit about these things the CEOs of BP, ExxonMobil, Shell, etc. may stop reading your strip, but sacrifices must be made for the greater good.

  102. Inkwell
    November 12th, 2012 at 12:36 am [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#98): It’s always weird when a fictional character shares your name, isn’t it? Though Inkwell is a manly name, my IRL name is Alice.

    Y’know, I’m like a real-life Otterloop fist of death Alice Mitchell. I’m even sorta hot in an old-school way…

    Just, y’know, throwing that out there.

    *coughcallmecough*

  103. Uncle Lumpy
    November 12th, 2012 at 1:03 am [Reply]

    @Inkwell (#102):

    You got a carpet beater?

  104. greghousesgf
    November 12th, 2012 at 1:17 am [Reply]

    wow, Dennis’ dad’s a wimp.

  105. seismic-2
    November 12th, 2012 at 1:45 am [Reply]

    @greghousesgf (#104): Yeah, and he’s a veteran (he served in the Navy), so that makes the Sunday cartoon seem especially strange. What really made it weird, though, is his shirt. Henry is now… Gunther! That’s not just becoming a wimp, that’s becoming the Überwimp. Will he start using his backpack as a weapon?

  106. sully
    November 12th, 2012 at 1:43 pm [Reply]

    Respectfully, you missed the biggest ‘difference’ in the Better Half dreck. If we are to assume that the woman in each of the panels listening to a parade of losers is Harriet Parker, why does she look absolutely nothing like the woman in the masthead banner to the left? Will the real Harriet Parker please stand up!

  107. Anonymous
    November 15th, 2012 at 12:27 pm [Reply]

    One Big Happy: This is still one of my favorite strips, and I have nothing to complain about so far as the writing is concerned. But I notice the art work has gotten careless. In fact every day I look at the day’s strip and one of the “classics” as it is called by GoComics. Not only have the drawn lines become shakier, the backgrounds have become totally simplified or eliminated altogeher.
    Part of the charm of this strip used to be the quality of the art work, and to my eyes, the artist has become lazy, or he’s in a hurry, or something. In any event, in my opinion, part of the charm and quality has been lost, and I am sorry about this.

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