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Metapost: Oh, yeah, here are the things I forgot

Sally Forth, 2/23/09

As you can see, the Forth family is trapped by a late winter storm, with inadequate food supplies. Kitty, so recently restored to health at great cost, will quickly become the world’s most expensive meatloaf; but which of the humans will give up his or her flesh to feed the rest of the family once cannibalism becomes necessary? Keep reading to find out!

…unless you live in Los Angeles and get your comics from the newspaper, because the LA Times just dropped the strip. Now, maybe those hot-tubbing liberal polyamorist weirdoes out in la-la land Hollyweird can’t relate to the good, decent people in Sally Forth, with their “marriage” and “daughter” and “jobs” and “suburban home” where “snow” falls out of the “sky.” But if you live in the Southland and want to express your disapproval, well, you can do so here, remembering always that firm yet polite complaints garner more respect than obscenity-laden all-caps rants involving Opus Dei and the Carlyle Group.

Also! Many of you have loved faithful reader Dean Booth’s comics mashups over the years. Well, he’s completely revamped his site into Dean’s Comic Booth, with daily comics spoofs in easy-to-subscribe-to blog form and a number of tools that make finding comics online simpler. Don’t miss it!

91 responses to “Metapost: Oh, yeah, here are the things I forgot”

  1. The Spectacular Spider-Brick
    February 24th, 2009 at 9:51 am [Reply]

    Hi Rachel! It’s Mardi Gras, so if you wave your tater-tots at the COTW float, they might throw you a Moon-Pie! (I’m 43. How’s that for maturity?!)

    Stop! Snark time! Doo do do do…

    9CL: Speaking of maturity… “Whoa whoa whoa wallah wallah it’s Howdy Doody time”!? Brooke, thanks to the high level of literary achievement in this strip, I’m sending you a gift subscription to The Writer, one of the fine magazines published by my employer. I’d like you to pay especial attention to any articles on the topic of “crafting realistic characters” or “writing believable dialogue.”

    Bizarro: The most amusing part of this strip is the assortment of marital aids on display in the store. Of note is the dildo on the second shelf and the boxes of K2 jelly, for when you’re ascending the second-biggest mount in the world.

    Curtis: Anybody who didn’t see this “plot twist” coming, report to Remedial Comics Theory right away.

    FC: Everybody aboard the Obvious Snark Express! Next stop: “Jeffy, that’s not peanut butter!”

    thorps. Looks like he’s nice enough to offer her the Pimp Hand in panel 3, though.

    Marvin: I think I speak for everyone here when I say, EEEEEEEWWWWW.

    MW: He has pleasant memories of Santa Royale? Are those the ones that were implanted by the Meddle Institute after an unsuccessful meddling?

    Phantom The Stripeyjammer Kids: Ghost-Who-Shaves-His-Horses likes a smooth ride. (*In the Bandar tongue!)

    SH: Attention coloring monkeys: The Sim “plumbob” should be green, yellow, or red. Or, if she’s in a Platinum mood, white. Never gray.

    SFx: Holy crap, where did Frankenstork come from, Lost Forest?!

    tAS: This comic is clearly a racist incitement to dunk Barack Obama in salsa and consume his brain.

    WoI: Ha ha ha, he’s covered in shit! That’s just hilari… uh… actually, that’s just disgusting.

  2. Charlene
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    Maybe they can’t relate to the idea of snow days.

    Then again, neither does anyone in Canada (ten feet of snow and forty below? The schools are still open!), and none of the papers here have cancelled SF.

  3. Jonny Quest
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    Judge Parker: Kathleen Parker has some nice points. Gloria, Abbey, and now April; oh to live in Parkerville, where all the children are smart, all the men have good hair and all the women are above average cup size.

  4. McManx
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    SForth — I can understand why the LA Times would drop the bland Forths, but to do so after Ted actually grew a pair of balls is regretable.

    MWorth — The only thing more painful to watch than Dr. Jeff’s kids’ romantic bumblings, is watching Jeff and Mary’s romantic bumblings. Having to watch both at the same time is just cruel.

    MTrail — For three days now, Mark has noted that the economy is “rough”. For Christ’s sake, we get it. I guess Mark will devote next Sunday’s panels to that endangered species, the 401K portfolio.

    Phantom — I see O’Ghost’s kids actually do have real clothing to wear. This makes their running around the jungle together in near nudity seem even more Blue Lagoon-y.

  5. McManx
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    F Circus — I have to admit when I saw today’s strip, I thought about that ecoli peanut butter scare. I guess then, more than the family dog would be known as “Barfy.”

  6. buckyswife
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:34 am [Reply]

    JP: For god’s sake, Katherine, watch those things around the stemware!

    MT: So is Mark now going to go talk to Ken? “Say, fellow, I hear your business is suffering. That’s rough! I’ll tell you what–I’ll hold Patty down, and you can smack her around until you feel better. That way, you won’t have to go around shooting pet deer!”

    MW: Adrian kinda looks as though she wants to expand Ted’s memories right there at the table. Those crazy kids!

  7. Calico
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:35 am [Reply]

    Oh God the green peanut butter
    Nice site, Dean. Love your mashups.

    MW – Playah!

    FC – Been playing with the dog again, eh, Jeffy?

  8. buckyswife
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:37 am [Reply]

    I want to take a moment to echo Rachel’s comments from yesterday. I’ve lurked around other chats before but never had the nerve to jump in because the chatters could be, well, scary–mean, looking for something to criticize, etc. But this is a far more congenial group–which is pretty funny and cool, given the level of wicked snark they’re all capable of!

    (Oh, and: 48)

  9. Rusty
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:43 am [Reply]

    Did I miss that point in the threads were we are all sharing our ages? Just turned 48 myself, if it matters, but my wife turned 49 yesterday. Hah!

  10. Hibbleton
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:45 am [Reply]

    MW Ted is a murderer as well as a con man.

  11. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:49 am [Reply]


    FB: Wot’s all this, then? An actual joke in Fred Basset? And cor! It’s approaching funny as well.

    MT: Let’s stipulate that Ken “has a good reason for being upset.” The next question is whether he has good reason for being a wife-beating fascist prick.

    MW: Happy memories that will be expanded indeed. Ted and Adrian signed up with Xbox Live for the Happy Memories expansion pack. Once they realized they were living in a virtual world…

    FC: Add a few flies to the panel and it looks like Jeffy is making a literal shit sandwich, rather than the usual metaphoric one.

    GA: Perhaps the funniest thing in the funnies today is Clovia’s implied suspicion that another woman out there would commit adultery with Slim.

    Marvin: My condolences to those of you who tried to read this over breakfast. Live and learn.

    Popeye: “Hey now, I didn’t draw this crap.”

    A3G: The like father/like daughter jokes just write themselves, don’t they.

    JP: Welcome to Barreto’s Back, Bust and Booze Boutique. We hope you enjoy your ogling experience.

    Shoe: Something tells me Shoe wasn’t “on the carpet” enough to satisfy his ex.

    Phantom: Once the Croccos meet with these terrifying bubblehead Aryans they’ll be even more desperate to move across the ocean.

    BC: Now that’s pretty funny.

    WofI: Today, instead of being chained to a wall, Spook has freedom of movement and an implement of escape. Happy Opposite Day, everybody!

    GT: Bryce is gradually acclimating to Milford, but it will be a while before he can say, “Let me take you to the bucket,” with a straight face.

    Crock: But someone did wear their color-changing pants today.

    6C: “In fact I’m sensing a business opportunity here. Do you know a little ditty called ‘The Michigan Rag’?”

    Blondie: “Come to think of it, the freshness of the tuna and the mayo really isn’t an issue. What’s a little food poisoning between friends?”

  12. buckyswife
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    #10 Hibbleton: Oh, don’t get me all excited and full of dreams that will inevitably be destroyed.

  13. Muffaroo
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    Archie – And thus is born Spidey’s greatest foe, Doc Vac!

    AD – I’ve been kind of missing Curls lately. Interesting to see he’s gone from being sarcastic to homicidal.

    Cshaft – And who was it again who called the leaf blower? Coming in 3… 2..

    DTracy – Good thing the car is labeled “CIA” so we can guess that the car in the first panel has Schelomo Tracy in it. Meanwhile, Squinty-Eyes Tracy is following Smelly-Eyes Angelorious. Talk about the blind leading the blind.

    FCircus – “Uh-oh, Mommy, I hurled! At least it didn’t hit the table. Or the plate.”

    Mduke – “MOM!! It’s— it’s not what it looks like, Mom…!”

    Marfield – His ass is a gross, red mass of oozing putridity? Well, at least both ends match now.

    MWorth – “I remember you now! Tedsy Wetsy! The little snivelly kid with the pencil-thin mustache! Say, did those towel scars ever heal up?”


    NSeq – Dogmath.

    Shoe – But did they match the carpet?

    Zits – Norm’s ears are burning. (Because he’s a platypus! Har! Get it?? Wait, I’ll laugh some more…)

  14. Krankenstein
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:58 am [Reply]

    As to ages: I’m 46, but I’m a Dad to three boys, so that tends to drag down my maturity level.

  15. These Strange Worlds
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:03 am [Reply]

    I sent in my obligatory “bring back Sally Forth: email and included a “Yay for For Better or for Worse going away.” I got eh equally obligatory form email back.

  16. Donutzilla
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    9CL: “Howdy Doody time”? How old is that girl? Come to think of it, a children’s show from the Fifties is less archaic than the usual language she uses.

  17. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    #34 yt Rachel,
    Let’s say if I’d had a busy social calendar right after high school graduation, I could be your father. I think there’s a pretty wide distribution of ages here.

  18. Generic D
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    Zits: Change the second panel to “I’d shoot my mother in the head for you”. Instant classic!

    Oh, and Sally Forth – a snow day I can accept, but who has a JOB where you get to stay home when it snows?

    (Rachel: I’m 38)

  19. Naked Bunny with a Whip
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:20 am [Reply]

    There’s nothing like a beautiful snowfall to turn the world a pale bluish gray, even indoors.

  20. commodorejohn
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:24 am [Reply]

    A3G – Oh man, this is going to be wonderful.

    BB – Mark my words, two months from now Mallard Fillmore will be writing a scathing indictment of these traitorous Commies.

    Crankshaft – Hey, Tom, one Miss Peach was enough. And then some.

    Curtis – ‘Nuff said. (Obligatory warning: TV TROPES WILL EAT YOUR LIFE.)

    DT – Oh, I give up.

    FC – You know, looking at it now, I can see that the joke (er, “joke”) is meant to be that Jeffy is observing the need to resolve the peanut-butter shortage he himself caused. But I like my initial reading better, where this massive glop of it isn’t enough for him. He needs more peanut butter! MORE, DAMMIT!

    FW – Hey, Batiuk, you and Greg Evans should get together sometime.

    FB – Um…well. Fred Basset got an honest-to-God laugh out of me today. Do you think this is a sign of the Apocalypse?

    GA – Why did Clovia’s face have to make it into the frame?

    GT – Uphill asking-out. It’s number two on the Milford Triathlon, in between doorknob boxing and non-Euclidean basketball.

    JP – Some days I’ll see a particularily good strip from one of the various comics I read and I’ll mention how much it deserves a Roy Lichtensteining. But Judge Parker? Baretto IS Lichtenstein. Friggin’ art, man.

    Luann – Tell us more about “bad ‘hards,’” Brad.

    MF – Venn diagrams are for high-falutin’ liberal poofs, apparently.

    MT – Mark Trail, he’s the densest thing alive/
    He’s the densest thing aliiiiiive

    MW – Okay, now Adrian is the creepy one. “Yes, Ted…they will be expanded! We’ll make happy memories together…suCH happy MEMories…*giggle*”

    MC – That’s funny, I have the exact same disease!


    Popeye – See, I can’t even make fun of Popeye, because I couldn’t be more insane than it already is.

    RMMD – Okay, that is pure, obvious slash-bait. No other explanation.

    SM – My God, it’s Big-Time!

  21. CanuckDownSouth
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:26 am [Reply]

    9CL Yes, Edda, you have ruined everything. By revealing your true emotional age as scarcely preschool, Amos will realize that any relationship with you will border on the pedo, so now he must leave your life forever, possibly by killing himself in shame.

    (Can anyone tell that I’m really, REALLY annoyed at 9CL’s endless dumb “twists”?)

  22. Niall
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:30 am [Reply]

    BC is funny two days in a row. Wow.

    Mark Trail: I hope I have established to the regulars that I try to be polite and considerate, even in my snark (which makes it not very funny). Even in regular comments, I believe it’s been well-established that I generally steer clear of swear words gratuitously. Therefore, I hope the following manages to convey to which depth of feeling this strip affects me when I say: FUCK YOU ELROD!!

    I really hope papers drop the strip over this. It was infuriating before because it was implied, but today it outright states it out in the open. NO, Elrod, stress still does not excuse or even explain marital abuse, okay? One does not follow the other! It’a sickness, and Patty is its victim, not Ken! Absolutely nothing you say now can redeem this storyline. I will give you the rest of the week (and month) to see if I drop you completely. Guh. Some things you can’t cover up by saying “sorry”.

    And I’m 41. And two thirds.

  23. commodorejohn
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:42 am [Reply]

    Also, I submitted this comment to the L.A. Times. It hasn’t shown up yet, but I dunno, maybe the comments are moderated.

    For Better Or For Worse is long past what prime it ever had. Sally Forth is just hitting its prime after years of mediocrity, thanks to the talented efforts of Mr. Francesco Marciuliano. And yet somehow, I can’t help but think that the strip that’s going to come back thanks to the protests is the one that doesn’t deserve to. Prove me wrong, L.A. Times.

  24. kalki
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    Age? Why do I hear Sympathy for the Devil in my mind whenever somebody asks for age? That either makes me Satanic old or Mic Jagger old. I’ll check my stone tablet birth certificate and get back to you.

  25. rhymes with puck
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:44 am [Reply]

    FW: At that’s when Summer realized she was ‘different’ from most girls.

    JP: April’s been burn listed? Does that mean Judge Parker gets to help her solve crimes as a PI while she tries to find out who burned her? And is Sam the Bruce Campbell character?

    MW: So they met online approximately one week after his wife died? Oh, that’s not creepy…

    A3G: Sorry to be obvious-man, but can you say ‘chip off the old block’?

    Spider-Man: As you watch Peter make lame excuses after getting caught by a security guard/nosey neighbor/child molester, remember this -Peter’s supposed to be a genius that created his webs and web shooters by himself when he was 16 or so!

  26. buckyswife
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:54 am [Reply]

    SM: I’m not sure what leap of “logic” took Peter from “a holiday” to “my sister’s birthday.” Are there any holidays that celebrate female birthdays? And unless your sister is 4, and you want to scare the crap out of her and her friends, well, the costume still doesn’t make any sense.

    Spiderman: Bitten by a radioactive spider, he’s been given the remarkable ability to find adversaries who are dumber than he is.

  27. Dean Booth
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    Thanks bunches for the shout-out, Josh. You got me interested in the comics to begin with. Used to be that I’d just throw images out into the interweb void. Now that I’m sort of a real blogger, the pressure is on!

    And thanks to all the great commenters here, my main source of inspiration.

  28. Larry McAwful
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

    I was never into Sally Forth when Greg Howard was doing the strip. I was never inclined to give it another look until I discovered Ces Marciuliano’s Medium Large, which is a Goddamned riot. Now Sally Forth holds a touch more appeal to me, and I actually get warm feelings from it. Ted Forth probably gets more fun poked at him than most cartoon father figures, by the readers, Marciuliano himself, and Marciulano’s wonderfully talented girlfriend, Sara Benincasa.

    Why do I feel such sympathy for Ted Forth? Maybe because he’s recently turned forty and become unemployed, while I’m turning forty in seven months and am kind of wishing I could become unemployed.

  29. Niall
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:12 pm [Reply]

    As for Luann… Umm, yeah, it’s not a guitar, so you have to learn how to play the game controller. Actual guitarists have the worst time trying to play the game, as reflexes keep kicking in. (Especially on their own songs, as previous threads mentioned.) But while I’ve certainly seen this kind of basic scenario played out, I can guarantee one thing: one does not sweat playing Guitar Hero. You can get finger cramps, you can seize those muscles between the top of your hand and your elbow, you can ruin your thumbs, but forehead sweating? Not even on Expert. This isn’t DDR.

    Dennis: When I read my Chron-Built Page, often I see only the top 2/3 of the Dennis strip, without the caption. What I saw today looked like utter, complete filth. Like, Dingo-level.

    Jugs: Someone is wearing a leopard-print dress and the word balloon in panel 1 is obscuring it?? Somewhere, there must be a scan of Barretto’s art before word balloons were placed on top. We mudgeons need it. Justice must be done to this strip.

  30. Uncle Lumpy
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

    #27 Dean –

    Used together with Comic Strip Archive, your Comics by Month is the best way to home in on any key comic from the past, like Heloise the Lady-Phantom!

    So, bless you!

  31. Comcis Fan
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

    Zits: Laughed out loud at it today.

    Sally yesterday: No way out from this house with the newly combative/renewingly committed husband when I want to dish about him to my old assistant.

  32. Brick Bradford
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:26 pm [Reply]

    I forgot and posted my answer to Rachel on yesterthread.
    To summarize–I’m 56.
    Maturity! HAH!
    I am old enough to remember when Peanuts was cutting edge, BC was funny every day, and the birth of PJ, of Family Circus fame, in the early 60s.
    No, I am not old enough to remember when FC was funny. No one is that old.

    We’re a pretty congenial lot around here because we don’t take ourselves too seriously. I mean, how cranky can you get over Ted Forth’s little man hands and Sam Driver’s lack of libido?

  33. Ranger
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:30 pm [Reply]

    #23 commodorejohn: That comment is posted. Brilliance in its finest form.

  34. gleeb
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    “firm yet polite complaints garner more respect than obscenity-laden all-caps rants involving Opus Dei and the Carlyle Group”

    So they got to you too?

  35. tagred
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    I’m one of the hot-tubbing liberal polyamorist weirdoes out in la-la land Hollyweird. It’s “The Southland,” please.

    I’ll let the L.A. Times know, again, what a sucky paper they are. This time, for dropping Sally.

  36. Ranger
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

    Oh, and if anyone is interested, 38 here.

  37. blueberrygrrrl
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

    So where do the Judge Parker ladies shop for clothes, anyway? Sherwin-Williams?

  38. Anonymous
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

    Today’s Argyle Sweater is RACIST!!! Where is Reverend Al to demand an apology?

  39. Master Softheart
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    FW: “Whoa! I never even thought about hitting her there!”

    GT: When Gil Thorp became comprehensible and leavened its strobe-light, drug-haze visual cutting through random scenes of high school sports and dismembered bodies with a plot and characters that are identifiable and consistent, I was concerned but intrigued. Today, with continuity, visually interesting and plausible artwork, and a real joke, I am astonished. From today forward, I will read GT regularly and explore this new world of inverted class/race stereotypes and psychological manipulation for the greater sporting glory of the Milford Milfs with an open mind.

    FB: Go team Basset! Fred Basset is the furry Bertie Wooster in “Jeeves, Do You Know Any Mutton Recipes?”

    Phantom: Man, I wish the narration box would come and make fun of these kids – or at least offer more fantasy panels of the girl all grown up and wearing the family stripey underwear.

    Dilbert: At least Asok is contemplating this as a specific form of revenge. In Funky Winkerbean it would just be the expected outcome for everyone.

    Peanuts: Ah, I wondered where the Spirit of Fred Basset had gone today. I guess even Charles Schulz had bad days. Snoopy, why don’t you go try to convince shareholders that Met Life isn’t on the verge of insolvency or something? Sometimes it’s tough not to see Snoopy as he became late in the strip’s run: a delusional, self-obsessed corporate tool that makes Garfield look like an act of pure artistic inspiration by comparison.

    Bu in the spirit of Softheartedness, note the remarkable visual economy and elegance of Snoopy’s changing expression in the first three panels. Even on days when Schulz was contemplating sticking his head in an oven, he was a master of his trade.

    Archie: There is no way to improve on Muffaroo’s comment @13, so I won’t try. I will note by way of complementing the point, though, that the explosive, starburst halo around the principal in panel 3 does look like the beginning of a Sailor Moon transformation sequence. Spider Man should be very worried, but at least that would be an enemy his experience watching TV has prepared him for.

    MT: After having been taught about bird strikes by Mark, I trust him for all my wildlife and nature education. Today he’s stretching into psychology with an educational exploration of another scientifically well-known phenomenon that deserves a wider audience: the tragic effect that economic stress often has on married couples. Sure, social scientists have long noted the correlation between recession and divorce rates as well as incidents of domestic violence, but attempts to make this important phenomenon known to a mass audience where the knowledge could help real people have been insufficient. Probably because they didn’t involve shooting pet deer; I guess that’s why Jack Elrod makes the big money.

    JP: I would like to pay homage to Eduardo Barreto today for what we might call selective anachronism. Having been dragged to UN diplomatic receptions and holiday parties for Wall Street firms during the bubble, I can say that almost no one dresses in the 1950′s-style black cocktail dresses that are common in the Parkerverse. Even setting aside the issue of the women in them, the dresses at this party are sadly something belonging to another age – and possibly even then only in Cary Grant movies. But Wilson and Barreto take the dramatic license offered by a legacy strip having an indeterminate relationship with time to bring us into an alternate world where the middle-aged Katherine can bare her stunning shoulder blades, April can display Dagmars that would make Harley Earl break down and weep, and Abbey… well, the strapless glory of Abbey’s dress would humble even the artistic pretension of a 9CL character. Thank you Eduardo Barreto!

  40. Poteet
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

    # 27 Dean Booth — Thank you. Great revamped site — I’m addicted all over again.

  41. Poteet
    February 24th, 2009 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    # 37 blueberrygrrrl — Bwahaha! Excellent.

    # 39 Master Softheart — Thanks for confirming my impression, per yesterthread, that those JP dresses are like those I remember in SCANDAL. Only more gravity-defying and better.

  42. Poteet
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

    GA — The name of the strip now derives from the unpleasant aroma of Slim and Clovia’s marriage.

    MW — And in the coveted category of Demented Remarks No Actual Human Would Ever Utter, the winner today is Adrian in Panel Two!

  43. Poteet
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

    9CL — On behalf of gazelles, who conduct their romantic lives in ways that make evolutionary sense and do not torture millions of viewers, I formally protest.

  44. tom
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

    So what Mark Trail is saying, if you’re a man and the economy is tough, it’s ok to beat your wife and shoot her pet deer. What century is Jack Elrod living in? So since this strip is saying “go ahead beat the wife, it helps with the pressure”

  45. Joe
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:14 pm [Reply]

    Crankshaft: Dust causes Lillian to turn into Mr. Mackey from South Park. Dust is bad, mmmkay?

    Red and Rover: Never thought I’d see a strip in which a dog gets hot air blown up its ass literally.

  46. Mibbitmaker
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:14 pm [Reply]

    MT: If this were a movie being roasted by Joel/Mike and the ‘bots, we’d be stuck in the most extended “BOOOOOOOOO!” in MST3K history.

    (fake advertisement)

    SEE what people are saying about “MARK TRAIL” –

    “This strip would’ve been my biggest inspiration years ago. It speaks to me in big ways.” — OJ Simpson

    “I get a real bang out of this storyline. And that’s the name of that tune!” — Robert Blake

    MARK TRAIL: A nature strip even a clear-cutter could love!


  47. Calico
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    #31 – “Rancid Platypus” = new name for Jeremy’s band.

    FW – I think Summer is about to become homicidal, yet all ends happily after defending her once-nemesis.

  48. Calico
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    #46 – Whoa! Ha. : D

  49. Dingo
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:18 pm [Reply]

    Have we seen Martin Magee before? I’d like him to be played by an extremely constipated Jerry Lewis. The type of man who’d stab your hand with his fork for bringing out the soup at the same time as the appetizer.

    “Red? Red silk? My daughter is being married in red silk instead of white organza? What is this saying? What does this mean? Is she a whore? Who but a whore gets married in red? That’s it! No open bar! Murray, get the car.”

    Oh, and I’m 44.

  50. Artist formerly known as Ben
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    #28 Larry McAwful,
    Sara Benincasa is Ces’ girlfriend? Seems like a good match. I recently saw her in a brief, hilarious parody of The Reader. I can’t link to the youtube clip right now but it’s on my blog.

  51. Rusty
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:23 pm [Reply]

    MW: Either someone is about to slap Ted (excellent!) or the artist has turned his left hand 180 degrees around to get his thumb in that position. Which would be more painful than dinner with Mary and Dr. Jeff.

  52. Rusty
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:25 pm [Reply]

    FW: The final panel has as funny a punch line as any other FW strip. And no smirking.

  53. Larry McAwful
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    #50 – Artist formerly known as Ben

    Yep, Ces and Sara are a couple. I understand he’s the one who held the camera for her infamous Sarah Palin “top secret vlogs.” I was delighted when I discovered that they knew each other; I happened upon Medium Large and Sara Benincasa separately.

    I’ll check out your link tonight; sites with sounds are a no-no here in the office.

  54. Stroker Ace
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:35 pm [Reply]

    SF ~ Good day for the Forth family to watch a DVD together. May I recommend ‘The Shining’. No surprise the LA Times dropped Sally Forth. Strip simply does not compute, relate, represent, resonate w/to SoCal. I grew up in Winkerbeanland & now live in LA. Lemmetellya…Cali don’t care about ‘flyover country’.

  55. Toff
    February 24th, 2009 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

    Who is the monkey drawing the comic Adam@home now and what happened to the old one?

  56. Mars
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:09 pm [Reply]

    Speaking of strip dropping…..boy was this a bad way to start the day off. I pick up my paper and it says they have to cut ten comics out of it due to you-know-what. I still want my own strip someday, and odds are good that when the economy recovers, they WON’T bring back the other ten spaces!

    To “make up” for it they’re going to start publishing the remaining dailies in color. Some band-aid. I want to work!

    Now it’s time for a poll, of course. At least we can get one good thing out of it. Help me banish awful strips by voting for them as “worst”! You know the Garfield and Family Circus fanatics are going to be voting in droves. Help me stave them off!

    In case you’re wondering, eight are on the “safe list” and not included: Dilbert, Doonesbury, Get Fuzzy, Mother Goose and Grimm, Pearls Before Swine, Stone Soup, Zits, and something made locally that isn’t published in any other paper. So you can’t vote for those in either category.

  57. T. Chicana
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:21 pm [Reply]

    MW: Happy memories of Santa Royale? I guess that means being an adult-faced kid and milling around at Charterstone pool parties…nestling in Chin-Beard’s big furry belly on a deck chair, all warm and safe…

    FW: OMG. Summer’s face! Her face! My God.

  58. TnJed
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:25 pm [Reply]

    General question. For anybody that reads it, does Adam@home look……odd today? As in a different artist? I notice it still says by “Brian Basset” online.

  59. Marthas Rolling Pin
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:30 pm [Reply]

    Meanwhile, in an obscure corner of the comicsverse,
    Ink Pen joins the pile-on teeing off on our favorite meddling old biddy.

  60. Malethoth K.
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:35 pm [Reply]

  61. Death to the FOOBS!
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:35 pm [Reply]

    TnJed: yeah, I read somewhere they have added an additional artist to this beloved strip, which is clearly too hilarious, intricate and deep for one person to draw…

  62. Old School Allie Cat
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:40 pm [Reply]

    FW – I think Summer has read the writing on her wall, and feels that if anyone is going to beat up on her soon to be step-sister, it’s going to be her.

    MW – I’m sure that like Sesame Street, Santa Royale is a mythical venue. That said, while I wouldn’t mind making a wrong turn and ending up on the former, I’d sooner walk through fire than visit the latter.

    Giles Throp – Slushy, huh? So that’s what you kids are calling it these days?

    RWO – I can SO relate to this. Once again, mad props to Hilary Price.

  63. bats :[
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:44 pm [Reply]

    22. Niall: it’s all right, Niall. Everything will be fine…Mark is just a titch slow on the uptake…think calm thoughts…

  64. Alfred E. Neuman
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:45 pm [Reply]

    #34 (yesterthread) rachel— I am probably the oldest curmudgeon at 65. Most of the young whippersnappers here have been dating themselves by the so-called “music” they grew up with. Let me tell you that it is all crap. None of that stuff can touch the popular music of my day, those swinging Gregorian chants.

    Today’s Snarks of the Ancient Curmudgeoner:

    FC— Jeffy prepares a large peanut butter sandwich to share with his friends, Sam ‘n’ Ella.

    JP— Holy Moly! Can we nominate Barreto for a Nobel Prize or something?

    MW— Adrian must like what Ted is saying, because she is giving him a really big hand.

    Zits— Jeremy is dissing My Cage by threatening to devour our favorite wildlife creature, Norm. You’d better watch it, punk, or we’ll send over Mark Trail to administer a FOJ.

  65. Dingo
    February 24th, 2009 at 2:49 pm [Reply]

    Martha’s Rolling Pin, I love the strip Ink Pen and noticed that today. The Chicago Tribune ditched it a few months ago and now I have to read it online. Yeah, ditch Ink Pen but keep FOOB, Cathy, Dick Tracy, and Brenda Starr. Lord knows, I’ve fantasized about Tyr in Norse God clothing, but seeing him in a business suit and flannel… I’d buy that man a beer.

  66. These Strange Worlds
    February 24th, 2009 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    34 YT Rachel: Ages

    I’m 54, but that just means I can appreciate the irony in both Rip Kirby and Shortpacked.

  67. buckyswife
    February 24th, 2009 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    63 bats:[ –Okay, very good. But can you bring to life my fantasies and have those giant pigeons enact their own little scene from The Birds? Because I truly won’t feel better until someone named KEN or MARK gets his fucking eyes pecked out. (I fear, though, that your art is too subtle for the violent catharsis I’m craving.)

  68. These Strange Worlds
    February 24th, 2009 at 3:05 pm [Reply]


    Jaws music pots up in the background…

    Who can help Edda get back her balance and move on to an adult relationship with Amos?

    Who but…

    …The Unicorn.

  69. These Strange Worlds
    February 24th, 2009 at 3:09 pm [Reply]


    “I’m so sorry. And how did your wife die?”

    “Yes, it was horrible. One day I came home and she was just gone. And all her things were gone too?”

    “Wha, that doesn’t sound like dead to m…”

    “Dead dead dead. And I could never have gotten over with it without the help of your daughter.”

    “Wait a second. Your wife was gone for how long before you hit the dating boards?”

    “Horrible I tell you…”

  70. Muffaroo
    February 24th, 2009 at 3:37 pm [Reply]

    Niall @29 – Not even flop sweat? [Nobody's mentioned Donkey Konga, which is the one I play, so I'm mentioning it: Donkey Konga is the one I play.]

  71. Marthas Rolling Pin
    February 24th, 2009 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

    Dingo, yeah, that little arc of Tyr’s remake was fun, but I have to say I prefer his original getup.

    And on the age thread, let’s just say I’m old enough to have seen Martha’s rolling pin in action and to still miss Pogo; young enough to appreciate MC, NAoQV and Mythtickle; and delighted to have been reintroduced to Little Orphan Annie and Brenda Starr in the last year.

  72. queek
    February 24th, 2009 at 4:23 pm [Reply]

    queek: never too old to be immature.

    the usual daily thoughts: Lio is win, Hilburn is a talentless HACK! with very poor timing for a lame pun.

    HotC: awwwwww.

    FW: My hackles are raised at the “public school plays rough bastketball” angle.

    MC: “hello my darling, hello my baby, hello my ragtime gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal!”

    Tank: well, THAT one made Wiley look subtle.

  73. TruthOfAngels
    February 24th, 2009 at 4:25 pm [Reply]

    I particularly enjoyed the utter hopelessness inherent in Sally’s ‘no way out.’ It was as if she realised she was really trapped in a wasteland comic panel between an ignorance-pursuing, most-likely-to-fail daughter and a workshy layabout of a husband.

    Ha ha! Sally’s life is pointless!

  74. SF_Reader
    February 24th, 2009 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

    Now, maybe those hot-tubbing liberal polyamorist weirdoes out in la-la land Hollyweird can’t relate to the good, decent people in Sally Forth, with their “marriage” and “daughter” and “jobs” and “suburban home” where “snow” falls out of the “sky.”
    - Or maybe, just maybe, they can’t relate to bad jokes and tired comics.

  75. David S. McQueen
    February 24th, 2009 at 6:14 pm [Reply]


    Wasn’t SF originally drawn by a black guy? Also, that ain’t a blizzard (snow blows sideways in a blizzard).

  76. thatquietkid
    February 24th, 2009 at 7:01 pm [Reply]

    I’m pretty sure Marvin and Lola are having a contest this week to see who can make the worst storyline that’s the most disgusting and the least funny. They’re both winning.

  77. angrywhitechick
    February 24th, 2009 at 8:49 pm [Reply]

    Wow. I actually live in the LA area and yesterday DID write to express my dismay that Sally Forth was dropped by the Times. But I’m wishing I could retract my comment now that I know what other kinds of people read this strip: The kind of bigots that get away with it because their rude comments are aimed at popular targets, such as Californians.

  78. sugarpie
    February 24th, 2009 at 9:15 pm [Reply]

    # 77 angrywhitechick I wouldn’t take very much of what is said here too seriously. (Aside, of course, from the legitimate slurs aimed at the halt and lame ie 9CL, FW, Crankshaft, FOOB, etc.) Don’t prove them right!

    If your comments were meant to be dripping with California-esque irony, then please ignore my disclaimer.

  79. Pakash
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:57 pm [Reply]

    Last night, unable to sleep and killing time online, I thought about the utterly pretentious, credulity-stretching and contemptible mess that 9CL has been for what seems like forever. I asked myself, “What did I ever see in this strip?” Then I discovered that the Houston Chronicle site has an archive of 9CL going back to 28/9/1998 (the comic itself debuted in 1994). So I read just over a couple years’ worth (minus the Sunday strips, which are unavailable in this archive), to the start of the archive.

    And you know what? I really enjoyed it. Sure, I skipped over the “Hallmarks of Felinity” installments (not being much of a pet person) and the sans-dialogue filler strips showing Edda stretching across two panels while cast in shadow, etc. But overall I found those relatively early comics witty (yes, even the Thorax ones) and charming.

    What happened, Brooke McEldowney? Why did you become so full of yourself as an artiste that you had to start doing seven-month storylines where nothing happens, writing all your characters as if they were over-intellectual 19th-century English dandies frou-frouing around in the tearoom? Why did you change Amos’s and Edda’s will-they-won’t-they relationship from light, funny and adorable to an oh-so-serious epic complete with lame double entendres and botched film allusions? Why did you turn Juliette from an aggressive and sex-crazed but fundamentally likeable middle-aged mom to an insufferable, misanthropic c-word, with Edda heading in the same direction? Why did you make Thorax over into the second coming of Ambrose Bierce, only one-eighth as witty?

    And yes: What. The hell. Was up. With. The. Unicorn?

  80. Rusty
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:26 pm [Reply]

    #79: I took a look at the earlier 9CL and also preferred it. I guess menopause has changed Brooke.

  81. Sheila Sternwell
    February 25th, 2009 at 7:27 am [Reply]

    #10 Hibbleton: MW Ted is a murderer as well as a con man.

    At first I thought you meant the SF Ted, and was quickly disappointed when reality kicked in.

  82. Crankshafts funky smelling corpse
    February 25th, 2009 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    9CL: As soon as Edda says yes, the strip has jumped the shark.

    Crankshaft: Who did not see this coming a mile away?

    FW: clichesville. The teenagers will become friends, mom & dad will date, some bigot in town will object, yadda, yadda, yadda…

    Jugs Parker: Whoever said Barreto was doing art is entirely correct: Half of these panels could be blown up as poster art. Lookit the ta-ta’s on that one!

    Phantom: The time of tramp frieghters “waiting to be hired” is long, long, past.

  83. Pakash
    February 25th, 2009 at 10:15 am [Reply]

    #82: Whereas I believe 9CL jumped the shark at least two years ago. In fact, I’d argue that if Edda were to say “yes” (and soon, not after six months of prevaricating), that may be a sign that the strip is jumping back, as it would suggest that at least one of the main characters is finally acting like a mature, reality-facing adult.

  84. nowukkers
    February 25th, 2009 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

    I believe in the Judge Parker era, the appropriate expression for April’s tracts of land is Va-Va-Voom. Oh boy. Pneumatic is an understatement.

  85. Libertarian
    February 27th, 2009 at 7:33 pm [Reply]

    Why on Earth would anyone ask a newspaper to keep Sally Forth!? It’s the unfunniest comic strip EVER. And that’s if you include Dick Tracy in the humor category. Ziggy looks like an illuminated volume of Shakespeare in comparison.

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