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NO JUSTICE NO PEACE

Jumble, 10/22/09

If you remember the first batch of WWMMD pictures, you knew that eventually I’d be put in chains at the behest of a corrupt justice system in the Jumble. You can see by my face that I’m shocked at this miscarriage of justice. How could I possibly be found guilty, when I know that I’m innocent? Does my snappy Fist O’ Justice shirt count for nothing? What monstrous jury pool would be capable of such cruelty? Faithful readers, while newspaper readers only got part of the story, I am authorized to share with you the entire courtroom scene:

I … I know I should have hired a lawyer with more courtroom experience. I’m pretty sure he was just doodling on his legal pads all through voir dire.

Blondie, 10/22/09

Here’s the thing, Blondie: If you don’t want to draw attention to your status as an ancient relic from another decade, it may be best not to build a strip around the fact that your main character usually struts about in an outfit that nobody in living memory has worn outside of the most formal situations, and you’ll particularly want avoid equipping him with another set of clothes that, despite his cheery statements to the contrary, would not make anyone in his probable 35-to-50 age range feel “young.” Nevertheless, I’m willing to give you a pass because chubby Dithers in a Nehru jacket is in fact pretty hilarious.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/22/09

So earlier this week, I noted that it would be an amusing improvement on the current RMMD storyline if Tim proved to be a sinister kidnapper. However, I’m even more pleased at the current plot direction into horrible social discomfort. Now that Peanuts is no longer being produced, there are very few places in the comics where you can see painful interpersonal awkwardness so deliciously drawn out until it makes you cringe. I look forward to the next several days’ worth of strips after this clumsy pass consisting mostly of silence — frosty in the passenger seat, humiliated on the driver’s side.

Apartment 3-G, 10/22/09

Speaking of awkwardness, this Apartment 3-G storyline is just getting better and better. Remember, the funniest Tommie storylines are the ones where she’s casually insulted!

Slylock Fox, 10/22/09

I’m assuming the parents in these Six Differences panels have commissioned some kind of report from their children on the pros and cons of various domestic pets. Despite their big smiles, I can’t imagine they’re all that pleased to see that the kids are just drawing on big pieces of paper. What is this, the ’80s? If you really want to make an impression, you want to set up a PowerPoint presentation, with animal clip art and ungrammatical bullet points about why dogs and/or cats are awesome. How do you kids expect to succeed as white-collar drones? Sorry, you’re getting a turtle.

192 responses to “NO JUSTICE NO PEACE”

  1. Carly
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:42 am [Reply]

    I love the amount of detail in that Jumble. There’s even a fist of justice shirt! I might have to go solve it for once, because I’m curious about the solution.

  2. Carly
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:45 am [Reply]

    Solved it (by which I mean “cheated and used an anagram solver”). Am disappointed that the solution is not “visit joshreads.com” but I guess that’d be a bit long for a Jumble.

  3. Scrumpy7
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:51 am [Reply]

    Who’s the lawyer supposed to be?

  4. tb4000
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:52 am [Reply]

    A3G: Tommie’s expression in the final panel is basically saying, “Well, you’ve got me there.”

  5. jzimbert
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:53 am [Reply]

    The lawyer is Stephan Pastis, creator of Pearls Before Swine, who used to be a lawyer in real life.

  6. Old Goat
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    Who the guy behind Trudy and MW?

  7. Dragon of Life
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:56 am [Reply]

    The great thing about A3G being a serial is that with all the slow-time that such a strip implies, Tommie actually realizes she’s been insulted with about the same periodicity as Halley’s comet. 3500 years from now, archaeologists will comb our records and put together disparate information across vast cultures to prove that we ancient people, too, noticed and celebrated this recurring phenomenon.

  8. emr
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:57 am [Reply]

    “Sorry, you’re getting a turtle.”

    Which might kill you! http://www.cdc.gov/Features/TurtlesSalmonella/

    I’m waiting for the Mark Trail story.

    And, I just have to say that I am IN LOVE with the Milford Mudlarks’ pink and green football uniforms. So prep.

  9. Digger
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    The only thing that could have made that courtroom scen funnier is if the judge resembled Judge Parker. Also, adding in Lisa’s ghost to comfort Josh would have been a nice touch.

  10. zamros
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    There’s a lot to love about that courtroom scene, but I think my favorite thing is Cathy smirking and wringing her hands as the judge sentences poor ol’ Josh to death by chainsaw.

  11. Uncle Lumpy
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    #6 OG –

    That’s “Jumble” Jeff Knurek, unrestrained in his glee.

  12. mvg
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:00 pm [Reply]

    Niall (y250): “But now I wonder which classic strip would be the worst fit for a shark.”

    Snuffy Smith – sharks have too many teeth for any role in this strip. (Of course the same could be said of an 8-month-old baby.)

    A3G: How did the neckline on Tommie’s bell-captain jacket plunge between panels 1 & 2? Is the sudden awareness that her dullness is so outwardly evident causing her to wither & shrink within her clothing until eventually there will be nothing left of her but a tiny pellet of compressed dust motes & pet dander?

  13. LUJBEM FEJF
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

    #6- Old Goat- That would be me! In Tomorrow’s Jumble you’ll see me toasting my vengeance.

    Hee Ho Ha!!!

    Now we know why Pastis gave up his law career.

  14. Bitter Scribe
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

    When I saw the B&W version of Blondie in my local rag, I assumed that Dithers was also wearing a tweed sport coat, which for some reason had buttons all down the front that he kept fastened. You can’t imagine how relieved I am to know that it is in fact a Nehru jacket.

    I think I spend entirely too much time at this site.

  15. Kibo
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

    Sheesh, Josh, you should’ve at least dressed up for your court appearance. It’s a special day! Next time, wear at least TWO wacky T-shirts!

  16. Will
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:09 pm [Reply]

    I like that the plugger is taking in the scene with passive equanimity, as a plugger should.

  17. bats :[
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

    This is great! Isn’t it nice to know, though, Josh, that those condemning you *don’t* include:
    1. Elly Patterson (eh)
    2. Les Moore (eh)
    3. Rex Morgan (looks like your fishing buddy is stickin’ by you).

    Then again, all of them might’ve been eliminated during jury selection. I’m also wondering who the prosecuting attorney was — Sam Driver, perhaps? Sexless and yet so penetrating with his line of questioning…

  18. Will
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:10 pm [Reply]

    Nice one, FEJF.

  19. commodorejohn
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:11 pm [Reply]

    Okay, Jeff Knurek is now officially up there with Bob Weber Jr. in the pantheon of awesome cartoonists.

  20. Topliff
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

    While the Jumble was easy – any word with a ‘Q’ is a giveaway, the Slylock Fox Find the Six Differences was brutal. What age group can that possibly be aimed at? The earring and shoe were particularly well hidden. Thank goodness I can read upside down or I would have had to waste even more time.

  21. Kibo
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

    Also, Josh, the bailiff is sneaking up behind you with either a nightstick or a Charleston Chew, neither of which you want to be bludgeoned with. Or eat. Clearly he’s decided that the presence of a filthy hippie in his courtroom requires some sort of beating, possibly a chocolatey-plasticky-chemically snacktacular one. That’s why your handcuffs are in the front — they only do that with really fat people, and the bailiff expects you to gain 300 pounds during the next two minutes as he crams nougatinaceously vile candy bars down your throat.

    Am I reading too much into this comic? Naah, it’s not possible to read too much into the “Jumble”. That’s what it’s for. Unlike the “Junior Jumble”, which is just for writing dirty three-letter-words in all the boxes.

  22. Steve S
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:16 pm [Reply]

    If Ruby’s current plan to get on a reality TV show doesn’t work, she’s going to claim Luann floated away on a homemade balloon. Come to think of it, that kind of fits the strip’s continuity anyway.

  23. bats :[
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:17 pm [Reply]

    Oh, yes…Happy Birthday, Mr. True Fable! Many happy eructions of the day! (well, that’s what goats do, and it appears to make them happy…)

    And for the record, Baldo’s chatting online with Yenny, a young Puerto Rican beauty who lives in a sea-side cabana with her family and aspires to be a fashion model (like her mom — still a hottie, too! — was), aside from her size 12 feet: http://www.gocomics.com/yenny/

  24. survivor
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:18 pm [Reply]

    CROON
    QUEER
    ISSNIT
    FILLET

    Solution ‘TEEN SECS’

    Jumble is accusing Josh of having secs with young teens. I had no idea Josh was such a pedophile.

  25. Jesse C
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

    that Jumble thing is too cool!! You should frame it!

  26. queek
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

    proof that the merlot works:

    http://hawtness.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/scott-bandit-P.jpg

    (possibly semi-naughty)

  27. Debidawg
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

    Goofing around on my lunch hour, looking at the peopleofwalmart site and I almost choked on my soup – Looks like someone posted a picture of Tim from RMMD!

  28. buckyswife
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:29 pm [Reply]

    23 bats:[ — Wow–I totally misread the second sentence of your birthday wishes to TF! (Although I suppose it’s a happy-birthday wish either way….)

  29. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:31 pm [Reply]

    Too bad about the conviction, Josh. But your eye makeup is really fetching. I especially like what the mascara does for your lower lashes.

  30. Jacob
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: Where is Tim’s head in the second panel? Is it some surreal universe where he can state his feelings freely? One where the laws of slight and shadow do not apply? I mean, I’m just having a hard time imagining a light source that puts the right side of his forehead (but not the left), the left side of his nostril, and the right side of his chin all in shadow. Even if it does work out, the light source is coming from directly below his face. Which way is he looking? Is he even watching the road!?

  31. Muffaroo
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:34 pm [Reply]

    9CL – Nothing to explain here!

    Dennis – “Oh, WOW, Joey. Did you ever look at your hand? I mean, REALLY look at your hand?”

    Herb – Sometimes a rerun is the best way to have the exact same words again.

    Mark – LAST TIME? Okay, Mrs. Bob, hit that ol’ hope chest and see if the moths have gotten to your widow’s weeds yet.

    Marmaduke – Just how much saliva does Marmaduke get, anyway?

    Mary – “Well, let me tell you about another ‘loser’…”

    Rx – Welcome to eternity: Purgatory by the Dashboard Light.

    Mibbitmaker @y195 – Muffaroo, he make the leetle joke.

  32. tymime
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:35 pm [Reply]

    Blondie is Beetle Bailey today?

  33. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    RMMD — I do hope these two will get out of the car soon, because I can’t stand to look at those gangrenous noses much longer.

  34. BigTed
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:41 pm [Reply]

    I imagine the phrase “Don’t worry, Tommie. You won’t win” plays over and over in her head pretty much constantly. Having someone say it out loud is just redundant.

  35. Calico
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    Y #228 – God, that was just perfect.

    Here cometh the meddle-claw and the story with no forseeable end.

    3G – Ruby, you’re quite the subtle thing, no?

    RM – Tim is creeping me out even more than Les Moore, which is really saying something.

  36. BigTed
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:50 pm [Reply]

    For a mildly villainous character like Mr. Dithers to wear a Nehru jacket — the favored outfit of both Dr. No and Dr. Evil — seems like overreaching. It’s sort of like Dagwood walking around dressed as John Montagu, the Earl of Sandwich.

  37. Gal Friday
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

    Very cool, FEJF! Even the Plugger Dog looks menacing!

  38. The Dead Acorn
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: I see they’ve finally succeeded in their efforts to raise Patrick Nagel from the dead and have him draw a panel as a ghost guest artist.

  39. Jackuul
    October 22nd, 2009 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

    Sorry, you’re getting a turtle named Marmaduke.

    That sounds more ominous.

    Oh well…

    Sorry, you’re getting Marmaduke.

    …is outright horror.

  40. Josh
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:01 pm [Reply]

    #32 tymime — Whoops! Fixed.

    Josh

  41. PaulH
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

    I only count 11 jurors. Get Patsis to demand a mistrial then hire Rat to do the appeal. (I’m assuming Garfield is the bailiff. If he’s a juror, he should be in the box. Although I’m not sure we want to see Garfield inside a box.)

  42. JP (not Judge Parker)
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:03 pm [Reply]

    A3G genuinely made me laugh today. Keep it up Margaret Shulock!

    And mad props to Jumble Jeff! Very cool drawing!

    I’m rather snark-less this week but it’s been keeping my spirits up to read all of yours!

  43. Larry Fine
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:05 pm [Reply]

    DT — What the heck happened to Dick’s arm in panel two? The long arm of the law doesn’t look so long here.

  44. bats :[
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:14 pm [Reply]

    I don’t know if a mash-up can increase geometrically or logarithmically, or if it’s just a plain ol’ rip-off.

  45. Juan di Fuca
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    Wow — congrats on being immortalized in that awesome jury! You’ve earned that guilty verdict!

  46. Écureuil Écumant
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: “Chubby Dithers in a Nehru jacket is in fact pretty hilarious.”

    Especially a kelly-green Nehru jacket that’s still so well tailored to his Nehru belly, which must have been equally expansive in 1966.

    And when I hear his voice inside my head saying “You bet your sweet patootie, kiddo” in a rich, Apu accent it really completes the image.

  47. Larry Fine
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    DtM — Not only is it night, but Dennis appears to be taking Joey to a remote spot, well out of sight of the neighborhood. What will happen next is not a pleasant thought to contemplate.

  48. Farley's Revenge
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

    9CL: Here’s a thought:: There would be no need to explain the jokes if you actually wrote some. Seriously, dude. Interminable storylines built around what apparently was the high point of your cartooning career-Amos ‘n Edda Humped On A Piano-aren’t funny.

    Here’s another thought:: You’re in a field where there’s bound to be criticism, fair or not. Get a grip and stop sulking before even Solange tires of you and starts giving you major cat scorn.

    Solange giving the cartoonist major cat scorn…Now THAT would be funny.

  49. Pozzo
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:23 pm [Reply]

    Cats rule; dogs drool! Or at least, the one in the drawing seems to.

  50. Jackuul
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

    The Great Mamathulhu drools the blood that will end the world.

  51. Farley's Revenge
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    #44bats:[: Heh. Once again, you rock.

    I think you’ve even provided LUJBEM FEJF with some inspiration: Find words that all use the same letters and work from there. The trick would be to get the right word for the necessary clue letters. Hee. That would slow things down for a bit.

  52. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

    Judging from the depths of their respective wardrobes, Mr. Dithers is about 30 years younger than Dagwood but looks like his dad. Guess money really can’t guarantee good health.

    Anyway, where are they holding you? Someplace where bailiffs can get away with skinny jeans and rugby shirts, obviously, but I want to nail it down for the candlelight vigil.

    FREE JOSH!!!

  53. Calico
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

    Happy Belated Birthday True Fable!

    Have some Potato-Ade and a smile:

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/25708522@N06/4034560207/

  54. Shlomo
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

    Josh, I wonder what your punishment is.

    A) Solitary confinement with only For Better or For Worse to read.
    B) Doing public service announcements saying “Mary Worth is not a meddler. She is a caring individual”.
    C) Co-authoring the next segment of Marvin’s Belly Lafs”.

  55. Écureuil Écumant
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

    50: Son, yo’ Mamathulhu’s so fat … she … she stan’ up an’ walk around wit’ her Demonic Throne stuck all up in her aaaaaaaaaass crack.

  56. appending_doom
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:43 pm [Reply]

    I’d be more worried about the presence of the younger Keane on the jury were it not more of a sign of our declining standards that somehow Marvin contributed to this conviction.

    How did they determine whether he voted ‘Guilty’ or ‘Not Guilty’, barring anyone capable of communicating telepathically? Did they assume him shitting his pants was a vote to convict?

    Another conundrum: how did they convince Mark to submit to the tedium of the American legal system, rather than simply punching Josh? Is that why Josh looks terrified? Is Mark Trail going to give him a vicious beating on the way to the comics’ page community prison?

  57. Larry Fine
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    A3G — Maybe a makeover show isn’t for you, Tommie, but there are other paths to the realm of reality TV. Have you considered marrying a disturbing-looking Asian guy and having 8 kids with him? That’s been known to work.

  58. Sam
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    The Six Differences Panel has subtle Halloween theme to it. With so many fingers on prominent display the reader is naturally inclined to confirm that nobody has lost a digit between the panels.

  59. Jackuul
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    @55 Marmaduke + Cthulhu = Marmathulu

  60. Farley's Revenge
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:45 pm [Reply]

    Luann: Gosh. If Luann had been playing Apocalyptica*, I bet Mrs. Horner wouldn’t mind a little Metallica.

    *I particularly like their cover of “Nothing Else Matters”**.

    **If you’re unfamiliar with their work, various music videos are available on Youtube

  61. Aviatrix
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

    I’m learning to touch type, so it didn’t occur to me to unscramble LUJBEM FEJF: it just looked like another typing drill, or perhaps an unknowledgeable attempt at Klingon. So yesterday’s threat of vengeance was not enough to tip me off that the revealed courtroom scene was really the rest of the picture. I spent a few minutes thinking “wow Josh drew that?” before I finally clued in. I feel like such an insider now.

    Much as I would like to see Rat defending Josh, as the judge himself found Josh guilty, the assembled eleven must be simply spectators, not empanelled jurors.

  62. Lauren
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

    I love how Tommie’s first line is almost a haiku. Except instead of contemplative, provocative poetry, she speaks in bland sentences and head-bobbles.

  63. hogenmogen
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

    Archie: Jughead leers like that every time he sees that disgusting old cook’s ass. She wears an apron – but no pants!

    ReFoob: Yes, Ellie. I’m your brother. I play the hosephonium, don’t you recognize me from all those shitty Boxing Day dinners?

    A3G: “Don’t worry, Tommie, you won’t win.” I’m going to find a little league team to coach, and I’m going to use that as my pep talk. It is a line that can inspire many young hearts to not only fail, but fail so spectacularly that they are reduced to a fetal position semi-comatose state spewing unintelligible drivel along the lines of the Family Circus kids.

    Rex: Woah, for a moment there, Becka’s driving companion almost seemed sinister. For a moment there, things almost got interesting. For a moment there, there would have been a point to four weeks of aimless driving around in the rain. Whew. Thank God it just turned out to be routine, uninteresting yet indelicately phrased banter. Next, they break out into song: “You Can Count on Me”. Then they discuss the Yankees starting lineup. Yawn.

    Spidey’s Narration Box: I usually love Spidey’s Narration Box. It’s my favorite part of the strip, and I don’t think it gets enough exposure by far. But today, they short-change it. I mean, it doesn’t even breathlessly announce “Next!” It just says “The reason!” What does that mean? Are we supposed to peel it back, and the explanation will be revealed underneath?

    How much do you want to bet that “The Reason” isn’t revealed until Saturday, and “The Reason” will be that BigShit is holding Sandman’s daughter hostage (because we didn’t see that coming last month).

  64. Écureuil Écumant
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

    56 appending doom says: “How did they determine whether [Marvin] voted ‘Guilty’ or ‘Not Guilty’? Did they assume him shitting his pants was a vote to convict?”

    Nope, other way ’round.

    “If it smells like shit,
    You must acquit!”

  65. AMC
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:49 pm [Reply]

    MT – “Don’t worry Honey. I’ll get out of that poaching gang some how…. Maybe I’ll fake having Alzheimer’s by going around and switching speech balloons with random people I meet in the swamp. Think that’ll work?”

  66. Sister Sestina
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

    Why does your cartoon semblance wear mascara, Josh? Does LUJBEM FEJF know something that we don’t? Rather REQUE-less of him…

  67. Naked Bunny with a Whip
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

    RMMD: While Tim’s awkward pass at a married woman in the middle of this crisis is certainly creepy and embarrassing, he’ll still have to work harder to take the title away from Anthony’s post-attempted-rape proposal-while-still-married with Elizabeth. (Which worked!)

  68. Comcis Fan
    October 22nd, 2009 at 1:58 pm [Reply]

    Hagar: Helga’s moment of tranquility is broken by the inescapable realization, two decades in, that she married a nincompoop, and that his pillaging journeys, nights at the pub and infuriating self-centered slovenliness all serve a purpose — allowing her to deny the reality of his nincompoopiness.

    S4th: Ted tries to joke his way out of sex with his wife, and out of talking about sex with his wife. Hmmm, and mere weeks ago he was jealous that a coworker was dating his office crush. Hmmm.

  69. hogenmogen
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

    Jumble: I wouldn’t worry, Josh. Marvin is bound to kill every other jury member via toxic fumes. And how could Mark Trail ever vote to convict someone wearing a FOJ t-shirt? Ziggy looks pissed, but this is a guy that routinely gets scorn and ridicule from his house pets.

  70. commodorejohn
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:08 pm [Reply]

    #67 Naked Bunny with a Whip – Quite true. I’m sure he’d do it if the opportunity presented itself, but innocent until proven guilty and all that…

  71. Mibbitmaker
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:17 pm [Reply]

    What’s going on? Yesterday’s Cathy went Curmudgeon-meta; Curtis and The Phantom are actually nice, moving stories; Apartment 3G is joining in on the fun here; Dick Tracy is actually exciting and suspenseful these last two days — and without countless suffocating close-ups; Funky Winkerbean is having a week like in the good ol’ ’70s and ’80s (and I laughed today! Laughed!); and ReFOOB‘s actually funny! ~Okay, who are you, and what have you done with the real strips? And how much payola will it take to stay this way?

    And how much to get the others to do the same?

  72. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

    H&L: “Awww look. Now he’s pushing the boat around with his little weiner. How darling.”

    Marvin: Instead of a “tea party” or a “juice box party”, why not make it a blanket party, with Marvin as the guest of honor.

  73. flodnak
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:21 pm [Reply]

    Meanwhile, Mary Worth’s response to Adrain’s worry and grief and guilt is to tell her a story! For the love of God, Mary, hasn’t this woman suffered enough?!?

  74. Dan
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:22 pm [Reply]

    The best thing about today’s Apartment 3-G is that Ruby and Tommie are wearing functionally identical outfits. I just picture a TV executive yawning sarcastically as Tommie walks in, and moaning, “WHY can’t we find a woman with shellfish earrings and a bow in her hair? THAT’S NIELSEN GOLD!”

    Speaking of which, is it just me, or are Ruby’s earrings actually trying to escape from her head?

  75. Violet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:22 pm [Reply]

    The appropriate reaction to the revelation that Ruby actually knows she dresses crazy is crushing disappointment, right?

  76. jumper
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

    I’ll admit Jumble Jeff is smart enought to know to come to the right place – here. If he’d shown up on Scott Adams’s blog, he’d be pestered by all sorts of geeky questions about what sort of string-manipulation software he uses, and stuff like that.

    Jeff, do you prefer to use Staedtler, Helix, Millennium pens, or what?

  77. Joe Blevins
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:28 pm [Reply]

    Tommie’s shirt isn’t boring, Ruby. On the contrary, it’s positively confounding! In order to access her, uh, womanly charms, a suitor would have to make his way through an increasingly-devious serious of buttons, buckles, and hasps, eventually coming to a grizzled old bridgekeeper who asks you to “answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.”

  78. Alan's Addiction
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

    Wow… It looks like the “Jumble” writers are taking a page from “How to Murder Your Wife” when it comes to enacting their twisted fantasies. I suppose what we should take away from all this is that all cartoonists are potential serial killers; so read the comics page if only to keep killers off our streets.
    I love the fact that all the characters in “Blondie” are still able to fit into their old clothes… It’s almost as if they originally bought the clothes intending to dive into middle age and senescense. Because what young man doesn’t buy a jacket thinking, “I bet I’ll look good in this in another twenty-five years and fifty pounds!”
    Attention, writers of “Rex Morgan, MD.” The reason why people make passes at one another in singles bars and NOT moving vehicles is that, if it fails, the rejected party can simply walk away and not deal with the embarassing next 1-20 minutes of discomfort. However, it would be amazingly awesome if you did have Tim simply state, “My apologies, gotta go,” and then fling himself out of the moving vehicle in the rain. Actually, you could make a successful comic strip around that single concept.
    Sigh. Another great set-up for Margo to get in on some limb-ripping action is wasted on Tommie. The worst part is, Tommie is probably thinking, “Ruby’s right. I don’t have any chance.” And then she’ll just sit and stare into space for a few hours, because that’s the only way she knows how to express any emotion.
    I have never seen anyone smile that blissfully at their children’s artwork. The parents in “Slylock Fox” are obviously on some sort of amazing hallucinogens. The kids too, based on those woeful attempts at drawing straight lines.

  79. AirForbes
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:33 pm [Reply]

    Poor Tommie – she’s failed to be remarkable even in a negative way.

  80. Ed Dravecky
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:38 pm [Reply]

    “Jumble” Jeff Knurek is my new personal hero.

  81. Violet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:42 pm [Reply]

    MW: Please, please let it be the story about how her friend Cathy’s mom was sort of nice to her one time when she was a kid and this somehow influenced her a jillion years later to control the lives of everyone around her.

  82. cheech wizard
    October 22nd, 2009 at 2:45 pm [Reply]

    RM – No, no, no, Tim – she’s the one who’s supposed to say “let’s just be friends,” not you! Haven’t you learned anything about women in all your years? No, I guess not.

  83. True Fable
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:02 pm [Reply]

    #23 bats :[ – Thank you hon!

    # 28 bucksywife – and thank you!

    #53 Calico – GOAT! Big smiling goat! Thank you darlin’!

    Oh, it’s been a simply goatastic day!

  84. Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:03 pm [Reply]

    Is this guy in Rex Morgan supposed to come off as sweet, or endearing? Because he’s mostly just creeping me out. If they were going for having all the ladies say “Aaawww I hope they get together!!!” they missed the mark.

  85. otsoyb*
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:17 pm [Reply]

    Jumble Jeff, that is very cool! However, the Mark Trail “I don’t understand your hostility toward me” shirt would have been more apropos, though harder to read.

    I’m going to do the Jumble now every day.</I<

    *That;s Bootsy jumbled, BTW.

  86. Calico
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:17 pm [Reply]

    Yes, seeing Josh in Jumble is multiterrific.
    : D

  87. SF_Reader
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

    MW: “Life is unpredictable! Let me tell you a story….”
    Damn! Just when we thought it was safe to read the comics again.

  88. Little Guy
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:37 pm [Reply]

    Yenny: Kudos to Alvarez! Gets us enticed with a Baldo crossover, and in the strip, gives us top-notch Flintstones crossover.

    Plus, Yenny makes June Morgan look like Cathy. :)

    PBS: Please let this go into next week. So much win.

    Luann: Please let the President say that Rich Troll is Madoff’s partner in crime.

    Meta-Jumble: Pastis as lawyer? Genius!

    Too bad Conley didn’t have Pastis as legal against Bob Lobel. Or is that why he’s smart enough not to do FOOB, for fear of a C&D?

  89. Aviatrix
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

    Howabominable@84: I can’t imagine this is supposed to be romantic to anyone. They’re just layering on the things to be frightened of: we’ve already learned that Alzheimer’s is sad, driving in the rain at night is dangerous, and people with shaved heads and piercings will yell at you if you pretend their homes are your pro shop. Now we learn that women should always tell their husbands where they are, lest pudgy men hit on them.

  90. Red Greenback
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:44 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: Since it’s a Nehru jacket he’s sporting, shouldn’t have Old Man Dithers responded with a hearty “You bet your sweet Bippy!“?
    Happy Birthday Truman!!!

  91. Bryan
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:48 pm [Reply]

    God, could you imagine being sequestered with this bunch?

  92. True Fable
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:53 pm [Reply]

    #90 Thanks Red! Ya crazy kid, ya!

    Galevav and I are off to celebrate!

  93. AhClem
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:53 pm [Reply]

    MW – Today’s strip reminds me of that scene in Airplane, where Ted Striker spills his life story to the woman in the next seat. Hopefully, Adrian will follow suit and hang herself by the time Mary’s story is done.

  94. Phred22
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:54 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: Cora will now reply, “You make me want to do the hootchie-kootchie with you, my tootsie-wootsie.”

  95. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 3:56 pm [Reply]

    # 73 flodnak — Apparently we haven’t.

  96. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:03 pm [Reply]

    Crankshaft — didn’t they hire the kid to rake leaves because ‘shaft had blown out his back? And now the kid is on his shoulders?

  97. Comics Bear
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:17 pm [Reply]

    A3G: it’s as if Ruby has been reading my mind. Creepy.

    Also, it wrong that having another cast member casually insult Tommie makes me giggle?

  98. tb4000
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:19 pm [Reply]

    Blondie: I’d say that the old jacket reminded him of the days when he was a mere lad and the first time they unveiled the Model T, but it would be up to you to decide if I’m talking about Dagwood or Dithers.

  99. Perky Bird
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:22 pm [Reply]

    If Mr. Dithers bought that Nehru jacket in his younger (and presumably fitter) days, and it somehow still perfectly fits his now paunchy, elderly body, there’s only one explanation: In his younger days, Dithers was actually a pregnant woman.

  100. Carly
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:23 pm [Reply]

    #54 -Shlomo: wouldn’t any of those constitute cruel and unusual punishment? (Especially #3.) I give it a month till the appeal.

  101. Hogan
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

    Six Differences always kicks my ass.

    The only thing missing in A3G is Ruby holding her spread thumb and forefinger over her forehead in the international symbol for “loser.” La-hoooooser.

  102. LUJBEM FEJF
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    Thanks everyone for letting me jump in and the kind words. Lurking was getting boring. You are the real heroes. Me, I am but a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more. The jury selection was difficult. This was the one time that there were actually volunteers to be on the jury and oppose to dodging their comic civic duty (like Josh). Keep the Jumble in your sights. This ain’t no free ride.

    #61- Aviatrix- I knew it! Leave it to the person who corrects my broken Klingon to notice that it wasn’t a jury trial after all.

    #76 Jumper – Black.

    #80 Ed- You sir, are a gentleman and a scholar!

    #85 Bootsy- That’s the plan!

    #88 Little Guy- Pastis just fell into place. Mr. “I love the Comic Curmudgeon! It’s the Bestest Blog ever!” needed to be included. Hopefully when he gets back from his “vacation” at the Gulf he’ll stumble upon it.

  103. BoulderDan
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

    Josh…I’m lost…why croon to the queer little comment writers on this board most of whom can no more put a proper sentence together than I can fillet a fish?

  104. One-eyed Wolfdog
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

    I really assumed that Marvin, denied the option of having a tea party, would simply go back four letters in the alphabet. Then again, I suppose in the world of Marvin, that particular event is so commonplace it would hardly make an effective protest.

  105. BoulderDan
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

    dammit…*crap*…I insist you address my post!

  106. Mibbitmaker
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

    True Fable:

    A birthday present (or sorts)

    If you go to http://www.veoh.com and type in The Hungry Goat, you can see a really cool Popeye cartoon (if you don’t have the 1941-43 DVD I mentioned yesterthread). There is a commercial preceding videos there (rolleyes).

    Once again,
    HB, TF

  107. Mibbitmaker
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:42 pm [Reply]

    #106 (me): That should be “of sorts”.

  108. towels
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

    Oh, good. I’m still reeling from all that gunplay in Mary Worth. I’m glad they’ll slow things down for a little story telling.

  109. jumper
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    My friend and neighbor works in the newsroom of the local paper, and often fields the phone calls from the irate cranks who call up and complain every time there’s the most minute change in the comics page layout, or, God forbid, the cancellation of a strip. Over beers after work, I tend to hear about it.

    Nevertheless, now that Jumble Jeff has shown us he is one of us, and of course the fact that I work the Jumble every day since about 1977, if they EVER mess with the Jumble, I promise to call my friend and neighbor and bitch unrelentingly like the aforementioned cranks.

  110. Écureuil Écumant
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:45 pm [Reply]

    103 — Has anyone told you what lovely eyes you have, the same shade as Dr. Jeff’s and Mr. Dithers’ jackets?

  111. Jimmyleg Jehosephat
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:49 pm [Reply]

    Blondie’s Young dropped the ball on todays. Blondie would not have let that fool leave the house with those black pants, wearing that tweed jacket. And Dithers can’t seem to color coordinate, either. Granted, that’s probably the result of the Mongolian slave labor or whoever colorizes the dailies, but Dag’s jacket clashes with those pants even in black & white.

  112. cheyenne
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:53 pm [Reply]

    #24 survivor: insist, and the final jumble I don’t get at all…

  113. cheyenne
    October 22nd, 2009 at 4:54 pm [Reply]

    oh, and the six differences really made my day :)

  114. Aviatrix
    October 22nd, 2009 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    FEJF@102 – Your Klingon was flawless. I merely suggested that cold revenge is best served with salmon squares.

    And I can easily rationalize the dialogue in the published version not matching what was really going on: it’s like a movie trailer where they edit bits onto one another and use lines out of context to suggest the movie is more exciting than it really is.

  115. Anonymous
    October 22nd, 2009 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

    A3G – All Tommie needs is to be drawn by the same folks who brought you the Amazing June Gale Morgan Makeover. June is the only woman on the entire planet to whom new motherhood provided perky breasts, a firm abdomen, long, lean thighs, and an apparent reduction in dress size from 12 down to 6. Tommie should forget TV makeovers and just hang out with Wilson & Nolan.

  116. One-eyed Wolfdog
    October 22nd, 2009 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

    If that’s Mark Trail in the jury box, he looks unrealistically realistic – if you see what I’m saying.

  117. mr 12 oz can
    October 22nd, 2009 at 6:02 pm [Reply]

    ok lets see just rename rex morgan noahs ark its been raing over 40 days on the dam golf course.. as for mark trail where is this general store that all these people who live in the woods are getting there coffee .as for mary worth second panal could that be mr queenie in the background !!!

  118. Vince M
    October 22nd, 2009 at 6:14 pm [Reply]

    90: Aww, ya beat me to it, Red. But yeah, ‘Laugh-In’ was about the only place I ever saw humans wearing the Nehru.
    Some years back, the local vintage clothing store had a formal Nehru jacket – black with gold embroidered paisley. If it were anywhere near my size I would have definitely bought it.

  119. Dr. Weird
    October 22nd, 2009 at 6:16 pm [Reply]

    How did Garfield cast his vote on the jury? Simple! With Mark Trail in the vicinity, speech bubbles often come out of nearby animals!

  120. Jamus the Bartender
    October 22nd, 2009 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

    Jumble: By an amazing coincidence, Cassandra Cat got a jury duty notice around the time this was drawn….but she gave the judge the ol’ ” can’t possibly serve because i’m a single mommy” and a barrel fulla tears, and she was out the door.

  121. Jamus the Bartender
    October 22nd, 2009 at 6:27 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth: Okay….um….Mary…..it was kinda your meddling which got Adrian into this in the first place…or not…but do we really wanna take that chance? Let’s eighty-six the story and offer to get her some coffee or sedatives. Or both.

  122. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 6:32 pm [Reply]

    # 110 Écureuil — I finally translated your name on Babelfish. It’s strangely alluring.

  123. AeroSquid
    October 22nd, 2009 at 7:19 pm [Reply]

    BB: How did Beetle manage to get a military grade transponder onto Sarge ? Oh. Never mind.

  124. Stroker Ace
    October 22nd, 2009 at 7:19 pm [Reply]

    Todays Jumble & Jury need to appear in their very own episode of Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law.

  125. Black Drazon
    October 22nd, 2009 at 7:56 pm [Reply]

    Dick Tracy is a juror? I… I had no idea that “Judge, Jury and Executioner” thing was legally sanctioned.

  126. sugarpie
    October 22nd, 2009 at 8:05 pm [Reply]

    Owww! Tough break Josh. I wonder if Pastis can get you a retrial? Maybe this time you can have your own gallery girls- like Charlie Manson’s. I’m betting that Poteet, buckyswife, and bats :[ might be willing to carve stencil a big ‘CC’ their foreheads.

  127. AeroSquid
    October 22nd, 2009 at 8:10 pm [Reply]

    MW: This is the first time I’ve actually seen the ‘Meddle Claw’ in deployment mode.

  128. towels
    October 22nd, 2009 at 8:16 pm [Reply]

    Al-96- I thought they hired the kid to keep the leaves away from Cranky, lest he set fire to them again.
    The back incident was last week’s news. (Maybe there’s been another time jump even)

  129. Écureuil Écumant
    October 22nd, 2009 at 8:36 pm [Reply]

    122 Poteet: Well, maybe a bit more so than, oh, say, “Eryngium yuccifolium)”…

  130. Raygun Wade
    October 22nd, 2009 at 8:55 pm [Reply]

    This is nothing compared to the upcoming civil suits.

  131. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 8:58 pm [Reply]

    # 129 Écureuil — Heh, I was cleaning E. yuccifolium seed just this week. And yes, your name is definitely more so.

    And per your earlier comments, I think it’s rather touching that Mrs. Dithers seems happy that Dithers still has that jacket. So often the Dithers are shown bickering or insulting each other. Just for a change, I’d like to think the jacket will be the prelude to a romantic evening.

  132. Sed
    October 22nd, 2009 at 9:00 pm [Reply]

    That courtroom picture? Outstanding!

  133. Écureuil Écumant
    October 22nd, 2009 at 9:11 pm [Reply]

    132 Poteet — It’s not hard to visualize some of those septuagenarian hijinx tonight chez Dithers’. Maybe even culminating in Dag glimpsing a naked Dithers dangling from the bathroom window trying to catch a fourth wind.

    And speaking of “fourth”, I wonder if the Nehru of Lu-u-u-uv would work for poor disrespected Ted. Maybe if he fantasizes it’s a Vulcan uniform.

  134. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 9:22 pm [Reply]

    # 133 Écureuil — I like that. And while he’s at it, Ted should try a pair of Vulcan ears. Even if Sally laughed, he’d be no worse off. And who knows.

  135. OMJulie
    October 22nd, 2009 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

    I never thought I’d say this, even as a faithful fan of the Jumble, but that – that is the most beautiful Jumble comic I’ve ever seen.

    I love the look on Dick Tracy’s face. You only get that level of outrage when you force him to actually participate in the judicial process.

  136. Ukulele Ike
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:07 pm [Reply]

    BoulderDan @ #103: As Sir Donald Wolfit said (or maybe Alfred Lunt, or John Barrymore), “Filleting a fish is easy; putting a proper sentence together is hard.”

  137. Joe Blevins
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:09 pm [Reply]

    Forgive my obtuseness, but who is that between Mary Worth and Bil Keane? (I don’t mean Billy. I mean the guy behind Billy.)

    Thanks.

  138. buckyswife
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:10 pm [Reply]

    126 sugarpie: I already have a tattoo—how do you know that it’s NOT a “CC” in a bright red heart—or in a flaming skull?

  139. Snowshoecat1
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

    MARY WORTH is going to tell a story. Run, Adrian, if you value your sanity, runnnnnnn!

  140. AhClem
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

    #131 Poteet -
    While I completely agree that intimate relationships should know no age boundary, the image of Julius and Cora Dithers making the beast with two backs is going to haunt my nightmares for a very long time.

  141. Crankenstank
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:14 pm [Reply]

    I thought that dirty beatnik in the jumble looked familiar today, but I dismissed the thought as being yet another decaf-mixup with my morning joe. Go figure.

  142. buckyswife
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:15 pm [Reply]

    Écureuil Écumant & Poteet: Okay, I had to check, too–that’s not what I expected, but I like it! (Given your recent bike encounter, was it also foreshadowing?)

  143. queek
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:25 pm [Reply]

    137: I’m guessing Leroy Lockhorn.

  144. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:33 pm [Reply]

    # 126 sugarpie — Ooh, a gallery girl! Not sure I could rock a stencil, but I’ll happily chant and wave a sign.

    # 140 AhClem — I know this won’t help, but somehow they seem more of a doggy-style couple to me.

  145. buckyswife
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

    144 Poteet: Gah! Does. Not. Help.

  146. sugarpie
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:35 pm [Reply]

    138, buckyswife If I get to vote… flaming skull! You are such a trouper!

  147. crazyjerseygirl
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:37 pm [Reply]

    As with #29
    Gee Josh you got purdy eyes!
    Uh you might want to keep away from Rex…
    ~Crazy

  148. sugarpie
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:40 pm [Reply]

    Poteet, 144 Yay! I’ll put your name on the list.

    “Free Josh! Free Josh! Free Josh!” Hmmmm…well its not “Attica!,” but we’ll work with what we have.

  149. zerowolf
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:42 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth: If the next words out of her mouth are “Picture it, Sicily….” or “Back in Saint Olaf” put a scalpel through Mary’s throat.

  150. Gabacho
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:43 pm [Reply]

    Mary Worth – to Flodnac at 73 who asks “hasn’t this woman suffered enough? Hell no, that bitch didn’t do nothing. She didn’t suffer. She didn’t even lose her money to Ted Confey. So I say “story on, Mary!” Take Adrian down.

    As re: Snowshoecat1 at 139 you say “Adrian, if you value your sanity”. . Where, oh where, did you get the idea that Adrian was any kind of close to sane? She cuts her hair with a bowl over her head, pretends to be a doctor, picks up bigamists on the Santa Royale Christian Singles website, and deliberately hangs out with Mary Worth. I am sure you’ll agree this is hardly the portrait of a sane woman.

    I, for one, am very interested in hearing Mary’s “story” that is sure to comfort Adrian.

    By the way, have you noticed that it’s all about Adrian again? I mean, no one is talking about Scott and Dr. Good’s bad prognosis, and poor Officer Colleague is lying in the Santa Roymart morgue, undoubtedly leaving behind a grieving family of some sort. Nope, it’s just about Girl Drew and her last chance for happiness.

  151. buckyswife
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:51 pm [Reply]

    150 Gabacho: I think there’s a simple reason for the Adrian-centric focus: Dead men can’t be meddled.

  152. zerowolf
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:53 pm [Reply]

    Curtis: Please tell me the freaky bird guy lures unsuspecting boys back to his apartment and feeds their sodomized corpses to the bluejays.

  153. zerowolf
    October 22nd, 2009 at 10:58 pm [Reply]

    Funky Winkerbean: Drowning, has he used that one before?

  154. AhClem
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:08 pm [Reply]

    #144 Poteet -
    Oh, thank you VERY MUCH for that image.

    I’m out of brain bleach, so if you’ll excuse me, I’m going into the shop and firing up my soldering iron.

  155. Blue Castle
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:10 pm [Reply]

    So, is everyone avoiding spoilers that no one mentioned how Dagwood is wearing the Eleventh Doctor’s costume? Or remembers the Master wearing a Nehru jacket?

  156. Poteet
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:19 pm [Reply]

    # 152 zerowolf — Thanks for the tip, because I don’t usually read CURTIS. I gotta point out as a wildlife pedant that raising bluejays in captivity is illegal without a special permit, and even then the adult jays must be released. But given what else I’ve seen in CURTIS when it’s featured on CC, I’ll just assume this episode is another interesting hallucination.

  157. commodorejohn
    October 22nd, 2009 at 11:47 pm [Reply]

    #156 Poteet – Curtis as a whole is an interesting hallucination.

  158. Poteet
    October 23rd, 2009 at 12:23 am [Reply]

    10/23

    A3G — Whoa. In the first panel, Ruby looks pretty good. In the second panel, her features have suddenly been ravaged by time. In the third panel, her face is heading back toward “pretty good” again. It’s like Flash Forward on drugs.

    MW — “Of course I always wondered why, when I wasn’t speaking to him, he had such a happy smile. Sometimes I almost even got the impression that he was picking fights on purpose…”

    MY CAGE — Hee hee hee hee hee!

  159. Poteet
    October 23rd, 2009 at 12:25 am [Reply]

    Okay, I confess. I am touched by all these comics about volunteering. Cockeyed though some may be, their hearts are in the right place. *sniff* And now it’s time for bed.

  160. Marion Delgado
    October 23rd, 2009 at 12:34 am [Reply]

    Uh, oh – check Ruby’s expression out in the last panel. The show is filmed in Amityville and the prize is Tommie’s SOUL!

    Admittedly, “I Dressed in the Dark” is going to be a little disappointed when they find out that the joke’s on them w/r/t what that particular prize entails. Probably you’d rather take home the home edition of the game.

  161. "Squeaky" bats :[
    October 23rd, 2009 at 12:41 am [Reply]

    126. sugarpie: hey, now!

    TGIFunnies!

    JP: upcoming boobie alert!

    MC: oh, no….really?!?! Thisissocool…

  162. Frank Parsnip
    October 23rd, 2009 at 12:49 am [Reply]

    MT: Why does he have to go into the swamp to hunt alligators?!? From panel 2, we can see he’s living in a place surrounded by bears whose paws and livers would command exorbitant rates on the Chinese markets. And most poaching laws don’t apply to colorable self-defense scenarios. What a bunch of amateurs!

    MW: She wouldn’t speak to him for weeks? Holy crap, I can’t believe Mary’s just giving away to Adrian the secret recipe for shutting herself up. Not since Superman started telling people at parties about his kryptonite problem have we seen such a blatant willingness to share disarming secrets.

    A3G: Silly and impulsive by Ruby’s standards? That probably involves parachutes and large knives.

    DtM: What the devil is that “Volunteer to Help Others” sign attached to? This isn’t Family Circus, so I can’t assume it’s being held in mid-air by God or their dead grandpa.

    Sex Organ, M.D.: “Money? I’m an outlaw golf instructor. I don’t need money… we live free and take what we want from people wearing nurse uniforms.”

    Juggs Parker: Yes, and if the D.A. gets his hands on those “assets”, um. I’d better stop here. Forget I said anything.

    Slylock Fox: I keep trying to draw that spooky front door, but that effin’ ghost and pumpkin are in the way.

    Beetle Bailey: Don’t ask, don’t tell, what this five-footed beast is now doing.

  163. Marion Delgado
    October 23rd, 2009 at 1:11 am [Reply]

    By last panel i mean 2nd of two, from wednesday, not thursday.

    although she looks mildly demonic today too

  164. Mibbitmaker
    October 23rd, 2009 at 2:08 am [Reply]

    The 23rd:

    A3G: Tommie started to consider it. Then the “I Love Lucy” theme came up…….

    BBlues: Curb your enthusiasm.

    Cranky: Depressed over nothing? Now that’s the Batiuk we know and loathe…

    FW: …But I still prefer THIS Batiuk. (ignore the one arm…. ignore the one arm…. )

    DT, p.1: They — they’re tiny now! Tiny people in a bird cage.

    H&J: Ah, the solution to gender prejudice: gender prejudice.

    JP: Here’s an idea — HAVE BARRETO DRAW THAT.

    Ghost-Who-Really-Fucked-Up: Gee, Phan, with someone like you around, who needs Michael Moore?

    MW: “… I was a self-righteous twit, Adrian.” “Was?”

    MC: great, CC-like snark on Batiuk and Funky, Ed! …Sorry you ended up picking the wrong week to run it, though…

    NS: Danae will rule through the heavy, heavy hand… of Wiley’s writing.

    PCity: Sacrilege!!

    S-M: Sandy?? Really???

    And deepest thanks to BC and Dilbert for rebelling against the week-long comics preaching. Now THAT’s volunteering for the common good!

  165. KarMann
    October 23rd, 2009 at 2:13 am [Reply]

    Make A Difference Day roundup:
    Agnes teaches us that you’ve gotta expect something material in return for your efforts.
    Archie teaches us that you’ve gotta expect some kind of reward in return for your efforts.
    B.C. teaches us that volunteering is like robbing people. Or being robbed. It’s not exactly crystal clear, and not worth the trouble to figure out.
    Baby Blues teaches us that volunteering is a pretty hopeless endeavour.
    Ballard Street teaches us that volunteering is much like being pissed on by a dog. At least that dog isn’t Hitler’s.
    Blondie‘s message is maybe the most reasonable yet. Volunteer to do what you’re good at.
    I’m not even sure whether Cathy is participating, but if so, it teaches us that the best way to help is directing your negativity at the rest of the world out there.
    Curtis was doing pretty well, too, until it got to that last awkward sentence. “Really yelling at me”??
    Dennis teaches us that volunteering can only end in catastrophe.
    Dilbert teaches us that the best way to volunteer is to get others to volunteer.
    Drabble teaches us that volunteering will get you smacked on the head. And stuck in an elevator.
    FC…. WTF? Is she putting dishes away down there? Fixing the sink? Why is there a drip in front of her arm? Is the ceiling leaking? I had trouble with this one before I even got to the “cute, charming” broken grammar shoehorned in there.
    Garfield teaches us to volunteer for something you can enjoy. Not awful, which is a step up for Garfield.
    HtH teaches us that volunteering will get you maimed or killed.
    H&L teaches us to volunteer others. But at least someone’s finally given an URL!
    JP manages to sneak in an offer to volunteer to draw a model in a fur coat, and nothing else. Well, not really, but I’ll accept the offer anyway!
    Lola teaches us that volunteering involves maiming others. I guess it’s the flip side to Hagar. But it gives the website, too.
    Luann teaches us to treat volunteering as a competitive sport, and continues this “service coach” idea I noticed in Baby Blues. Also gives us the website.
    Marmaduke‘s harem is back! Bring on the volunteer bitches!
    Mutts is cute, sweet, short, and to the point. Did you expect any differently?
    PmP is subtly done, and would work well on any other week of the year, unlike so many of these. Kudos!
    Red & Rover teaches us that volunteering isn’t about what they want, it’s about what you’ve got.
    R=R teaches us that we mere humans can never seem to do anything good.
    6C: I’m not touching those beavers. No, really, I’m not!
    SS teaches us that volunteering just involves eating sweets.
    Speed Bump teaches us that volunteering is for the dogs. No, really.
    BMoEL teaches us that if there’s no ice cream for you in volunteering, give it a miss.
    WoId is the best it’s been so far this week, but mainly by the others being completely awful.

  166. KarMann
    October 23rd, 2009 at 2:40 am [Reply]

    And, with that out of the way, the rest of the 10/23 crop:
    9CL is back to not explaining its ‘jokes’. “It’s called HUMOUR!” Where have I heard a cry like that before?
    Baldo: Oh yeah, make sure to get that lava lamp in frame. The chicks really dig on those, Pop.
    DADT: I suggest that formation be called a ‘walker’, in Greg’s and Mort’s honour.
    Bizarro: I’m afraid I’m going to have to commit Piraro to the Alanis Morrisette Clinic for Those Who Don’t Get ‘Irony’.
    Cranky: Umm… what?
    ReFOOB: And others just want to rewrite their family’s lives the way they should have turned out, dammit!
    FtW: Couldn’t she ever get around to removing the sleeves and sewing them up at a reasonable length, instead of that god-awful rolled-up look? Fashion Police, can we get a ruling?
    GT managed to impress me just by bringing up our snarkily-suggested idea that Duncan needs to start drinking and fighting more. Too bad it was dismissed out of hand!
    H&J: Now that’s what I call a straw man!
    JP: You know, I’ve heard that one of the first rules of good writing is “show, don’t tell”. I’m pretty sure it works for comics too, nudge nudge!
    Jumble: Woah! When did they start throwing in words like “RINGO”?!
    MT: Oh no, is it going to be story time here, too? Maybe we can get Bob and Mary together, and see if they mutually annihilate.
    MW: ZOMG! Mary was young once?
    Monty has just done some of the worst damage to the fourth wall I’ve ever seen. I like it.
    MC: Can I get a “hell, yeah!”?
    PBS: Thank you thank you thank you, Pastis, for seeing this through! That’s curiouser, all right!
    Pluggers: And thus begins the great Mark Trail/Pluggers crossover of 2009.
    Is Rubes (relatively) subtly referencing PBS and the zeeba neighbas?
    S4th: Oh yeah, judging by his response in the first panel, Ted’s mind (among other things) is wandering, all right.
    S-M: Gosh, who could have possibly seen that coming? *yawn*
    Tiger came -><- *that* close to making an advanced mathematics joke. And blew it.

  167. Jason1981
    October 23rd, 2009 at 2:48 am [Reply]

    10-23:

    And today, we see yet another reason why My Cage kicks ass.

  168. Farley's Revenge
    October 23rd, 2009 at 2:50 am [Reply]

    #155Blue Castle : But the outfit looked good on the Doctor.

    A3G: “When was the last time you did something silly and impulsive?” “Um…this morning I remembered to breathe.”

    MC: Heh.

    MW: Instead of laying on a heavy guilt trip about Adrian’s lack of interest in her future late husband, Mary’s rambling on about a story from her misspent youth that has no bearing on anything except in her imagination. Come on, Mary! Get your shit together and put the pedal to the meddle!

    As it is, Daddy Jeff has spent more time with the future corpse than Adrian, who swears she loves Det. BF. Yeah right. She talks a good game but her attitude is “Meh. So he’s about to croak. Big whoop. Let’s get back to me and my suffering.”

    PBS: Definite win.

  169. Just some guy
    October 23rd, 2009 at 3:07 am [Reply]

    Cathy looks just plain evil, as she condemns you to death.

  170. Alfred E. Neuman
    October 23rd, 2009 at 3:25 am [Reply]

    Friday stuff:

    9CL— Anyone interested in seeing Amos’ “fleshly beast”? I didn’t think so. Pass the brain bleach, please.

    MC— Memo to Comic-Con organizing committee: Don’t seat Batiuk and Power at the same banquet table.

    RMMD— Josh, you’re totally clairvoyant. On Oct. 19, you wrote:
    “Barring that, maybe…Becka and Tim will just fall into an adulterous affair and forget all about his demented mother, who will settle into a wacky sitcom-style lifestyle with the golf pro and the punk rocker. “Hey, old man, I know you’re senile, but could you at least remember to light a match after you stink up the bathroom? This trailer isn’t that big!” “Are you ready for your golf lesson?” “I’m hungry! When are you going to feed us?” [CANNED LAUGHTER]”

    In today’s strip the SOL (senile old lady) says:
    “People give us food! Do you have our dinner?”

    Dang! How do you do that?

  171. Lucky
    October 23rd, 2009 at 3:45 am [Reply]

    HotC: I did not see that I did not see that I did not see that…
    MC: Regrettably I can’t seem to come up with anything worthwhile to say here despite the fact that this is pretty much the best My Cage I’ve ever read, so a little ah hah will have to do. Ah hah.
    PC: That looks like a board game, or a squiggle of one rather.

  172. Sheila Sternwell
    October 23rd, 2009 at 5:21 am [Reply]

    I’m pretty sure you can get a mistrial declared, as the Plugger juror is sleeping. That look of anger is from years of hardship and despair and is not directed at you specifically. Just, you know, at the cruel creator of his world.

  173. John C Fremont
    October 23rd, 2009 at 6:55 am [Reply]

    Nothing funny to say today (so what else is new?) but I just have to give a great big “Thank You!” to Ed and Melissa for today’s My Cage. You guys have absolutely made my day. Possibly even made my entire year.

    Oh, and PBS was pretty awesome, too.

  174. yellojkt
    October 23rd, 2009 at 7:21 am [Reply]

    My Cage: Oh, snap. How did such a depressing play get past the PTA in the first place? Did somebody make an impassioned plea for artistic freedom? Backatchya.

  175. ChattyGenes
    October 23rd, 2009 at 7:25 am [Reply]

    Thank you Stephan Pastis, for making me laugh today. I really needed it.

  176. Little Guy
    October 23rd, 2009 at 7:29 am [Reply]

    MC: Ed and Melissa: You are OUR heroes today.

    PBS: Another Clas-sic!

    GT: Backtracking, why didn’t Gil just think it was a bullshiat call?

    Baldo: Now that’s just wrong.

    Big Nate: For some reason, the schmaltz works here.

    Lio: Sybil Alert!!!!

  177. Whippersnapper
    October 23rd, 2009 at 7:55 am [Reply]

    A3-G: Impulsive? Tommie? Ruby’s entire conversation this week indicates that she has suffered a head injury that has caused her to forget everything she ever knew about Tommie. Or maybe Tommie is just so boring that people forget everything about her as soon as they walk away from her.

  178. queek
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:09 am [Reply]

    MC: Ed and Mel, you have achieved Pastisian levels of WIN! on today’s strip. Well DONE!

  179. TheCasey
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:13 am [Reply]

    Friday!!

    A3G – “Silly? Impulsive? Does not compute.”

    ‘shaft – That’s right, Ed. Nobody needs you around anymore. There are younger, more efficient, less troublesome people who’ll get things done. Let me introduce you to Jeff Shark’s son.

    GT – “I know I don’t have the best track record with these kids, Mimi, but give me a little credit.”

    RMMD – Third base! ha ha ha!

    Zits – Apparently I missed the show in History Channel when the cavemen cooked their golf clubs. Or had scrub brushes.

  180. Niall
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:17 am [Reply]

    Jumble won everything yesterday.

    My Cage wins EVERYTHING today. I’m glad I was home so I could LAUGH.

  181. Doctor Handsome
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:35 am [Reply]

    So am I crazy, or is the Jumble passive-aggressively calling you a queer?

  182. Écureuil Écumant
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:41 am [Reply]

    @155 Blue Castle: “So, no one mentioned how Dagwood is wearing the Eleventh Doctor’s costume?”

    He’ll have to walk in robed as the Twelfth Imam before I get excited about it.

    @170 Alfred E. Neuman: “9CL— Anyone interested in seeing Amos’ ‘fleshly beast’?”

    I momentarily read this as “fleshy breast” and said “Sure, bring it on!”

    @165 KarMann: “Service Coach”, now there’s a perversion of nature: “My task is to facilitate your acquisition of political correctness.” Naw, that’s my folks’ job. You wanna be a meritorious meddler? Go be a “Movement Coach” for Marvin.

    Sorry, kids, I just can’t help thinking of “service coach” in any other scenario but a WWII troop train headed to the West Coast where the boys will be shipped off to Corregidor. They hook up the “service coach” in Vegas for one last memorable servicing event. Volunteerism at its finest.

  183. Jimmyleg Jehosephat
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:42 am [Reply]

    At least Josh gets a speedy trial. Apparently the blood isn’t even dry on little “Not Me’s” knife and Josh, set up, is getting prison doors slammed on him the same day if not minute. Which makes it pretty obvious the killer is AGGGGGGGGH

  184. Ida Know
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:43 am [Reply]

    I know. I know where Jehosephat lives.

  185. gleeb
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:50 am [Reply]

    ‘shaft: Another opportunity to micromanage an young person draws to a close, and Ed’s feeling a little empty.

    ‘bean: Oh, fercryingoutloud, END! You have lost the ability to make funny band gags, Batiuk. This is tedious and unpleasant. The only good thing about it is that it isn’t some lazy-way-out “volunteering” gag, and that’s probably just because you already used up that material in the Cancer Bataan Death March story. Look, just give someone leukemia or have Creepy Les develop a paint-huffing problem, or something, but keep off the band from now on.

    Steve the one-legged ex-Seal/JAG lawyer: A model in nothing but a fur coat? Show, don’t tell.

    Mark: The bear, overhearing the troubles these two are having, will volunteer to be poached. Shouldn’t YOU give of yourself as well?

    Spidey: I think he thinks his daughter is trapped in the phone.

  186. Zamboni_Rodeo
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:54 am [Reply]

    FOOB: Boy. Poor, put-upon Lynn Ellie just can’t get away from the male chauvinists, can she?

    My Cage is full of WIN!

    The Argyle Sweater: The Far Side did it already. And did it better.

  187. Écureuil Écumant
    October 23rd, 2009 at 8:54 am [Reply]

    @181 Doctor Handsome says: “So am I crazy, or is the Jumble passive-aggressively calling [Josh] a queer?”

    Actually, I rather suspect FEJF is subliminally proposing a daily doggerel contest using the unjumbled words and referencing a comics character. Something perhaps along these lines, which might be uttered by Sgt. Snorkel:

    “I cannot CROON, I must INSIST,
    But still one thing is clear –
    With a FILLET knife in my fist,
    I sure can bone a QUEER.”

    OK, so in reality it’d probably just be a cake knife. Artistic license, people.

  188. Jumper
    October 23rd, 2009 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

    I’m glad I saw A Beautiful Mind. Now I know that secret codes in the Sudokus and instructions from Sam’s dog found in the Jumble are figments of my own… What’s that you say? Oh, yes… yes, I will… work to do…

  189. Elektro
    October 23rd, 2009 at 3:01 pm [Reply]

    I demand a mistrial on account of the jury being stacked.

  190. Q. Pheevr
    October 23rd, 2009 at 3:27 pm [Reply]

    From now on, when anyone asks me whether I like the daily Jumble, I shall say, “Yeah, but the director’s cut is better.”

  191. Marion Delgado
    October 25th, 2009 at 4:30 am [Reply]

    I always thought Baldo was commissioned by Lou Dobbs to make the case against Mexican immigration, so having him be shut out by his repellant father is as close to fan service as I think we’re going to get.

  192. Cathy Viviano
    November 22nd, 2009 at 8:30 pm [Reply]

    Where are June, Rex and Sarah and Abby re: Rex Morgan?

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