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Ziggy somehow hits even bottomer

Ziggy, 4/8/10

Man, I can’t even pretend that I know what the hell Ziggy is talking about here (the way I pretended with yesterday’s Family Circus — it was about Easter eggs, apparently? Ha ha, people eat Easter eggs! Who knew!). As I usually do when I’m confronted with a slang term that I don’t understand and I want a repulsive definition for it that was fabricated by 14-year-olds, I consulted Urban Dictionary. The first definition given there — “the word used to replace ‘share’ in a request to do so with someone” — can’t be right, as Ziggy is a loser with nothing to share with anybody; he even seems to have once again misplaced his recently rediscovered pants! Thus, we’re left with definitions two (“Defecation. Derived from the term number two.”) and three (“Spar’s strong white cider, sold in bottles of 2 litres, originally for 2 pounds, hence the nickname twosies, often abbreviated in writing to ‘zz.’”). These are both strong possibilities, actually; Ziggy’s facial expression, with undereye bags and a crooked half-smile, could be taken as indicating that he’s shat himself, or that he’s drunk in public in the middle of the day on some British cider drink, or that he’s shat himself in public in the middle of the day after getting drunk on some British cider drink.

Gil Thorp, 4/8/10

You know what would actually be pretty great? If, just as Derek “Slim” Chance has discovered that being a teenage alt-country singer in a Central City bar is about a bazillion times cooler than being a pitcher for the Milford Mudlarks, the Gil Thorp comic strip would realize that, just for a few months, following the adventures of non-athletes might be a bazillion times more interesting than watching yet another team of dim jocks try and fail to make the playdowns. Since it’s been widely acknowledged that the last spectacularly awesome Gil Thorp storyline came three summers ago when Kaz punched his way into Gail Martin’s entourage, the reconnection of our be-mulleted hunk with the world of music can’t in any way be a bad thing.

Boding particularly well is Slim’s rhinestone-encrusted, dice-festooned outfit. I know that’s supposed to be cowboy-style fringe hanging off his sleeve in panel one, bit it looks like his arm is just leaving a trail of pure light behind it as it moves, indicating that Slim is truly a magical, transcendent figure, or that Kaz’s acid is finally kicking in.

Apartment 3-G, 4/8/10

I just want to pause briefly in the midst of all this awesomeness (Ha ha, “She won’t dare shoot me!” And look at Margo’s face in the second panel! “Hey, lady, only I get to insult and belittle my father!”) to contemplate the word “stepmother” for a moment. Is this really the right term for the relationship between Margo and Bobbie? I mean, yes, technically Bobbie is a woman who is not Margo’s mother but is married to her father, at least until state of New York or that illegally purchased firearm dissolves that union. But generally the word is reserved for a woman your father marries sometime after you were born and his relationship with your mother dissolves, and not, say, the woman your father was married to when he knocked up the maid, and who raised you as her own, hating you and him and herself all the while. I have no idea what the correct term would be, though, and I’m open to suggestions.

Baldo, 4/8/10

Ooh, Tia Carmen and her supermarket romancer, who normally only interact in soap opera strip art form, are going on a real date! We’ve been shown that he’s apparently gone nuts and bought a wedding ring already, but he may be reconsidering that decision now that she’s shown up for dinner dressed as Cruella de Vil.

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