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Family matters

Apartment 3-G, 10/20/10

Three years ago Lu Ann’s sassy cousin Ruby arrived in New York with some bags that needed carrying, a coquettish smile, and a wildly age-inappropriate set of hair ribbons. Today we meet Tommie’s Aunt Iris, hauling in her own luggage and showing more personality in three panels than Tommie has in the last year and a half. Apartment 3-G’s long-term plan of replacing its core cast members with their older and dowdier yet spunkier relatives is proceeding apace.

Family Circus, 10/20/10

This is the second time this week we’ve been treated to the sad and hilarious sight of a Keane Kid’s brain shutting down as a defensive measure to prevent too much knowledge from seeping in. At least Billy’s mind has been overwhelmed by genuine book-learning, unlike Jeffy, whose feeble mind can’t even deal with basic cable.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/20/10

Actually, Li’l Tater is presumably refusing to participate in cannibalism, based on a hilarious misunderstanding of the relationship between his name and the potatoes thrust before him. The confusion will eventually be cleared up, but this virtuous impulse will once again become a problem when he’s old enough to attend Hootin’ Holler’s most cherished annual ritual, the Fricasseein’ of the Revenooers.

247 responses to “Family matters”

  1. Tony Bell
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:06 am [Reply]

    Tater must actually be about 56.

  2. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:07 am [Reply]

  3. Topliff
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:12 am [Reply]

    What a disappointment. I sure Iris was Jack’s wife just back from serving time in Provo.

  4. Shawn S.
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:15 am [Reply]

    A3G: You can see Margo is intimidated by this new challenger, who appears to be strong as a mule and yadda yadda.

    FC: Billy, you’ve only written three large words and some scribbles. Grandmothers around the world are probably posting this on their refrigerators though. “Haha, my grandson is a moron too!”

    Snuffy: You won’t have to rename him since you feed him bowls of butter, sour cream, and gravy. He’ll be dead soon enough.

    Luann: Get to the part where Brad gets beat up and Tori leaves Brad already!

  5. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:19 am [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#y192): Do you remember saving/playing programs from cassette tape?
    That was on our Timex/Sinclair 2068, which used my boom box for storage. I really liked that little computer. When we got the jr, I let Mom and Dad have the Timex (which was abandoned by the company weeks after we bought it). Years later, they gave it back, but it couldn’t load programs any more, and I regretfully let it get tossed out.

    @commodorejohn (#y193): The real distinctive feature of the PCjr was the idiotic little demo that would start in if you accidentally hit two frequently used buttons at once. That must have enlivened some sales meetings back in the day. I’ve told this one before, but we looked at the brand-new Macintosh before deciding on the PCjr. I was pretty impressed by the Mac, myself, but IBM was seen as more stable.

    @Carl Barks Fan (#y219): I have no strong feelings about Agnes, but the strip did overcome my initial irritation about the drawing style, which must mean something.

    @wossname (#y235): Well, you have me beat. I passed up the chance to take BASIC in high school in 1971-2, and didn’t have a computer class until maybe 1979-80. I was impressed by a friend who got on some network, probably DARPANET, where he obtained sheafs of computer nerd jokes and ASCII printouts of Playboy playmates.

  6. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:20 am [Reply]

    Blondie – Nice lampshade today. It almost makes me overlook the fact that Shorts Men’s Store seems to be a real business, possibly run by a friend of the artist.

    Close – Microwave oven from 1997! This brings the list of things McPherson can draw convincingly to about five.

    Dick – “We know all about you, Tracy,” she said, rolling her eyes expressively. (And since she’s now on her third set of facial features, it seems clear that she’s being drawn today by yet another customer at the comic shop. I presume this will go on until they find one who can draw dames.)

    Family – “Mom, how do you spell ‘cruel world’?”

  7. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:21 am [Reply]

    Gasoline – Count your blessings, Rover! They probably won’t be after you for pushing the bus off the cliff until tomorrow morning.

    Mark – Last time we saw that drawing of Mark from panel 2, I think it was asking somebody to pass the syrup.

    Monty – Hindenburg? Too soon!

    Phantom“I’m not leaving here without a look at That Prisoner!
    Aaaaaand… freeze frame on Marlo Thomas turning and looking up!

    Pluggers always throw out the baby with the bathwater.

  8. Dorian
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:24 am [Reply]

    The thing I truly enjoy about today’s A3G is the italicizing in “that niece of mine?”. Iris is very clearly claiming ownership of Tommie, ignoring the fact that that’s hardly something the other two or going to be inclined to fight over.

  9. Steve the Pocket
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:25 am [Reply]

    Apartment 3G: Going through Margo’s mind right now: “A challenger appears.”

    Baldo: I dunno. If she’s become so delusional that she sees willingness to throw out attic junk as a sign of willingness to get rid of elderly relatives, maybe she should be in a home.

    Bizarro: This is either more or less funny if you know about the recent redesign that DC made to her outfit.

    Funky: Once again, the reporter’s question is funny in context, but sounds suspiciously like Tom complaining about his critics. On the other hand, he might be the first person to use the word “whore” in a newspaper comic strip, so there’s that. And in the Internet-slang sense, too!

    Herb & Jamaal: Stealth rerun. Moving on…

    Wizard of Id: Normally you make the fire first before trying to apply it to a moving target. And they wonder why they’re still peasants.

  10. Holden
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:31 am [Reply]

    Can someone make a gag out of the the change in background between the two panels? The aunt seems to be some kind of demon calling forth hideous items of home decor.

  11. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:32 am [Reply]

    an old pun, with kitteh.

    psssst, Arlo, you need one of these, not a cat!

    soggi corgi for bb,u.

    For Ted Forth, and others of a certain time.

    Best take on the Katy Perry/Elmo kerfluffle that I’ve seen. (SFW, unlike most of them!)

    For True Fable.

    bebeh fennic has squee > 9000.

    beagle pup is close behind in squee factor.

  12. Tom the Sailor Man
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:39 am [Reply]

    Post jumped, but I think it bears repeating:

    A3G: “More luggage, mule!”

    Now back to lurking…really…

  13. gnome de blog
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:48 am [Reply]

    Girl Reporter, Calico: Shh! Don’t tell anybody.

  14. Terry in Maryland
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    Phantom: “I’m not leaving here without a look at that prisoner!”

    She could be hotter than Savarna! Now that I’m free to date, no need to tie myself down.

  15. Mustang
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:59 am [Reply]

  16. TheDiva
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:02 am [Reply]

    9CL: You know, he’s a male ballet dancer; I sincerely doubt this Fernanda gal was the first person to ever insinuate that he’s light in the loafers…

    FW: “I mean, what’s a happy ending, anyway?”

    MW: Mary, Mary, this is Adrian we’re talking about. Do we really want her to trust her own judgment? Remember the “Queenie” debacle?

    SM: I find it really hard to take a villain who wears 3-D glasses seriously.

  17. wossname
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    @gnome de blog (#13): Because nobody else has ever noticed such an occurrence. (Right, bb,u?)

  18. zenvelo
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    Funky Winkerbean- Is Les trying to insert himself into the California Governor’s race?

    Funny, because I don’t think anyone would ever use the word “paramour” in a sentence about Meg Whitman.

  19. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:06 am [Reply]

    SM: Elwood syndrome.

  20. Wilbur
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:09 am [Reply]

    Whoa. First glance at Aunt Iris and I thought… Wow.. that’s looks like Sarah Palin in a wig. Then she talked about her animal strength and stubbornness and I thought… Wow… that IS Sarah Palin in a wig!

  21. zenvelo
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:12 am [Reply]

    There’s a decided shift in Mark Trail’s world view- the pen is mightier than the fist! (I had to be a bit careful on the spacing between words there.)

  22. vanya
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:16 am [Reply]

    Luann: The people in this strip are so unlikable, so stupid, so lacking in any redeeming virtues or human qualities, that I find myself reading Funky Winkerbean to restore my faith in human nature. Ye Gods, this is a disaster.

  23. JC Lisbon
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:16 am [Reply]

    Maw, I reckon we may hafta call child protective services instead, let ‘em know yore tryin’ ta feed a baby a big bowl of butter, sour cream, and gravy!

  24. Amateur
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:17 am [Reply]

    MW: It would be wrong? Is she reading from the Bride’s Bible or something? You can’t wear the wrong dress or the wedding god will smite you with boils on the big day?

  25. But What Do I Know?
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:19 am [Reply]

    The Ghost Who Likes Clever Lyrics — Maybe he thinks Nat King Cole is trapped in that cell. . .

  26. mark
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    A3G: “Aunt Iris”? That’s a man, baby! That’s Dustin Hoffman. You’ll see.

  27. Ellie
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    MW- Is Jill kneeling on the floor next to Mary? My God, she must be 9 feet tall!

  28. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    MW: Jill’s next move. “Let’s blow this joint. Here, check out this brochure. You can have a perfectly wonderful wedding at the Happy Buns Nudist Camp.”

    Adrian’s jaw drops.
    Mary swoons.
    Jill laughs and walks away.

  29. Professor Fate
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:29 am [Reply]

    FW: In the contex of the strip’s world – i’d say the reporter asked the question because the book is full of bad over blown purple prose normally found in bad novels.
    Two you send out Galley Proofs (paperback binding) of the work to reviewers and any writers you want to get a quote from (some do it for a fee – I remember when I worked in publishing, Stephen King had the reputation of being a total quote whore – send him a book and he’ll give you a quote.) The thing is this is done before the book is published not at the launch party – which is really just for the author to sign some coipies and drink some booze on the publisher’s dime.

    Treating this as a Meta coment about his crtics I just have to say: Fuck you Batuik.

  30. Government Cheese
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:29 am [Reply]

    Luann: And what purpose did this exercise serve? Other than to keep TJ relevant in the script and to show readers that he and Jerry Seinfeld shop at the same thrift store.

    BGSS: They need not worry about Li’l Tater’s culinary preferences; he’s aged 40-50 years living in a shack near Three Mile Island.

  31. Dood
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:37 am [Reply]

    It’s funny, I first read that Apartment 3-G opening line as, “I’m Tommie’s Aunt IRS … ” Fearful of the looming audit of the gallery’s nonexistent records, Margo quickly concocts her response: “Really? I’m Lu Ann’s Cousin Homeland Security. Will you consent to a full body search?”

  32. LUJBEM FEJF
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:44 am [Reply]

    Mark- Do you really want to tell the guys with the GUNS that you their worst enemy?

  33. Carlo
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:48 am [Reply]

    Is there a different artist drawing Lu Ann each day in A3G? Compare today’s strip with, say, a strip from the long-forgotten time of yesterday.

    Maybe it’s because it’s not filled with despair and cynicism that I genuinely enjoy Red & Rover. Also, I completely relate to today’s strip. Perhaps R&R can restore vanya’s faith in humanity?

    In other news, looks like Cody from Gil Thorp will receive a roadside beating when he gets mistaken for one of them sodomites, or he’ll get hit by a car while jogging.

  34. Dood
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    Mark’s just trying to move up to No. 1 on the senator’s enemies list.

  35. Red Greenback
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:50 am [Reply]

    BGandSS: If this was strip was written by Stephen Bentley, Tater’s name would be “Sidey”. Which, of course, is short for “That Side Dish Everyone’s Talking About.”

  36. Red Greenback
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:54 am [Reply]

  37. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:00 am [Reply]

    A3G: Pssst. Girls, that’s Tommie with a wig, librarian glasses, and a complete psychotic break. Don’t let her near the cutlery.

    Marvin: Ah, let Jeff have a little dignity, will you? Well, as much dignity as you can have as a character in Marvin. Actually, never mind.

    Phantom: Ghost-Who-Walks is a huge Natalie Cole fan. (In the Bandar tongue.)

    MT: Frank disappears into the background, even when the Senator directly addresses him. Meanwhile Mark makes vague threats to all in attendance. Frank will be disqualified from office for being a lousy host, if nothing else.

    H&L: Trixie is in a crib. She’s apparently being fed. Social services must have stopped by.

    9CL: Good first step, Seth. Where’s the nearest window?

    OBH: Snakes are again held down by mammalcentric prejudice.

    FW: Don’t be silly, Les. Whores have to have some personality.

    S-M: “Okay, so I can’t make you my wife. Is there at least a flat surface we can screw on?”

    Popeye: Please. That’s all we need, one more strip with recycled golf gags.

    JP: Oh dear. If Sam takes this position, his workload will double. What’s two times zero again?

  38. Foobar
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:01 am [Reply]

    The dowdiness is about the same, actually.

  39. Dennis Jimenez
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:01 am [Reply]

    Man, a Tjuana bible of Snuffy and Ma, must be some nightmare stuff….

  40. Lawyerbob
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:10 am [Reply]

    Today’s A3G is much more interesting if you imagine the characters as contestants on “RuPaul’s Drag Race.” Certainly, those hairstyles are better explained as elaborate wigs, and the conflict immediately becomes much more intense. “Margo” and “LuAnn,” working in their studio on RuPaul’s next challenge, something to do with making jumpers with large collars out of the nearest drapes, are caught short by the appearance of a new contestant, the sassy “Aunt Iris!” She’s an immediate threat, what with her already-made green drapery jumper and her signature tune, “I’m Strong As a Mule And Twice As Obstinate!” I can’t wait for the runway show at the end of the episode!

  41. Spunde
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    Wait. If they want quotes pulled from an article about Les, can’t he, you know, say something and have Ann write it down? “Intervew” and “book review” rhyme, but they aren’t the same thing.

  42. Anonymous
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:21 am [Reply]

    A3G – Stranger danger!

  43. jmy9595
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:23 am [Reply]

    After some exhaustive research, I have verified independently that extensions ARE indeed awesome. See? http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100328150007AAGrY4H

  44. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:25 am [Reply]

    @Steve the Pocket (#9): Re Bizarro: Wow. I guess the lesson here is that Wonder Woman would look a lot more like a stripper if she lived in Canada.

  45. Jeff
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:38 am [Reply]

    Are we sure those are potatoes thrust before him? It kind of sounds like they’ve served him a plate containing nothing but butter, sour cream and gravy. But this diet does nothing to explain Tater’s appearance.

  46. Stroker Ace
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:42 am [Reply]

    Snuffy – Tater only eats what he kills his own self. And then only from his NASCAR bowl.

  47. Dood
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:47 am [Reply]

    Is Snuffy out of the Hootin’ Holler jail on some sort of non-work release program? I thought he was pulling 20 hard — while yukking it up — with Mr. Big-Time Criminal.

  48. Mela
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:48 am [Reply]

    Wednesday

    9CL: Spike her like a football, man! Do it!

    A3G: I think Josh is right. Slowly but surely, our heroines are going to be supplanted by sassy older women. Not that I might – then it might read like a “Golden Girls” knock-off.

    Baldo: “We’d never think of putting you in a nursing home! We were looking at institutions for your increasing irrational paranoia.”

    Bizarro: Coming up in the next DC/Marvel Amalgam event, the Albertan Amazon.

    Edge: And now she’s posing as my grandmother. Yeesh.

    FW: I think a certain special snowflake WRITER didn’t get along with the Ohio media all that much. But that’s because they’re actual flesh & blood people, and Tommy only feels any respect for his characters.

    GA: In a better strip, this would end with Rover having a psychotic snap and becoming at the very least the most hateful man ever.

    Luann: SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP-

    MW: “It’s so generic! Generic is beautiful!”

    PBS: Huh. I pegged Goat to be more of a poli-sci major with his oh-so-socially-sensitive routine.

    Popeye: I’m used to just looking at this strip and thinking “What?” But when it makes sense, like today, it actually hurts more.

    6Chix: “By the way, I hope my dead babies were appetizing.”

    Zits: Having seen her son do something that she knows is good but still forced to acknowledge he is no longer a widdle boy, Connie’s body goes into a spasm.

  49. commodorejohn
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:53 am [Reply]

    Agnes – I’m saving panel two for future avatar usage.

    A3G – Hooo! More crazy relatives! I can’t wait for her to spend the next week or two saying the kind of amusingly folksy things Sarah Palin thinks she does, while Tommie hovers uncomfortably on the periphery, wishing to God that she could go back to barely existing.

    Bizarro – There should be a joke about the Canadian national animal here, but damned if I can think of one.

    BrS – I like this guy. Could we stick around for more of his animal-themed ramblings?

    DTM – Strangely enough, I find today’s Dennis The Menace to be pretty good, although still not really menacing by any common definition of the word.

    DT – Is it just me, or did Dick Tracy just pull off understated, concise satire in panel three? …nah. It has to be just me.

    FW – No, you’re an attention whore. [*]

    JP – So is it me, or is Judge Parker slowly evolving into some kind of rich-white-men gay Platonic porn?

    MT – Panel two is…deeply unsettling.

    MW – Is that Adrian’s murder face? I think it is! And one pointed jab is all it takes to get her to hulk out? Who knew?

    MC – That never worked for me, either.

    OB – “Oh, there you go, bringing class into it again!”

    Phantom – Have a look, then. You’ll notice there’s this thing in the door? It’s a new deal called the window.

    Popeye – Poor, poor Tuna Salad. For facing an extended stay with these psychos, she sure puts on a brave face.

    SM – Well, at least he gets straight to the point. And is proactive. And has more sense for culture than just sitting around watching daytime TV. …MJ, you’re not that attached to Peter, are you?

  50. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:53 am [Reply]

    Nancy — Confidentially, I know a few guys (and gals) who wouldn’t mind cleaning your garage, Fritzi*

    Snuffy Smith — “Tater” was supposedly the winning entry in a newspaper “Name the Baby” contest, but I’ve always believed that he was actually named after Sheriff Tate! (And was Sheriff Heck Tate in To Kill a Mockingbird named after Hootin’ Holler’s sheriff?)

    *Although it’s questionable whether she still has the same teeth she had in 1922, Fritzi still looks mighty fine for a woman who’s pushing 90!

  51. Mr. Goboto
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:57 am [Reply]

    Phantom: I’m wondering if all this isn’t an elaborate sex roleplay that the Phantom is intentionally drawing out. The first three or four years of their relationship consisted entirely of Phantom rescuing Diana from various pirates, bandits, and grifters. He probably can’t get it up unless he’s kicking in doors and punching people out, and she can’t get into the mood unless she’s been bound, gagged, beaten, and abused. I bet this whole thing’s really an anniversary gift from Python.

  52. AndyL
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:59 am [Reply]

    I’m still holding out hope that this is time-traveling future-Tommie.

    Incidentally, what is it with relatives showing up unannounced with piles of luggage? Don’t they have Hotels in New York?

  53. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:00 pm [Reply]

    @Mr. Goboto (#51): stock up on candy, Mr Goboto. You’ll be needing it to throw next week.

  54. Plinko Commie
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:04 pm [Reply]

    Funky Winkerbean: In which USA Today sends a reporter to Les’s press availability. The Westview Cancer-Tribune writer would have asked “so why didn’t you have Summer kill herself?”

    Popeye: IF THAT’S A FISH, YOU’RE GOING TO TAKE UP GOLF! Sorry, any snark I have for the rest of the strip (Hey Olive, why don’t you remember your blond, half-aquatic vertebrate twin sister?) would just fade next to the blinding glory of this completely non-sensical line.

    Dennis the Mild Irritant: Your initial reaction is eh, stupid kid comment from stupid kid. But given how big he appears in today’s panel, we can only assume that Hank Ketchum’s disembodied ghost has triggered a time jump, one in which Dennis, carefully cloistered by a limited worldview and surroundings, wore progressively larger overalls and striped t-shirts. And unlike Dennis, everyone else matured as well as grew. Too bad we missed the senior prom panel where everyone was partying and thinking about their post-high school life except for Dennis, at home playing cowboys and indians with Joey’s retarded little brother while wondering why his pants moved every time he thought of Margaret.

    Family Circus: At least Bill was smart enough that he said “I don’t think my brain has any more room. Because if he thought it, he’d forget how to control his bowels, leaving Dolly as the only Keane child with that talent.

    Curtis: Do we have a betting pool on what the Tekk-Tron 1000 is? Gun? Video game? Auto-tuner so he can sound like T-Pain? Feminine hygiene product?

  55. nescio
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:12 pm [Reply]

    The scowling Mary Worth in panel one is so delicious I might as well skip lunch.

  56. Mr. Goboto
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:13 pm [Reply]

    @Mela (#48) re: Josh re: A3G: I was going to make a joke about Margo’s older, “spunkier” female relative having to be Lucrezia Borgia, but then I remembered it turned out to be her pill-addicted, sex-trading, homicidal not-mom Roberta, which is practically the same thing.

  57. commodorejohn
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

    @Plinko Commie (#54) re: Popeye: Are they really twins? I mean, I’ll accept anything as “equally coherent as the current Popeye storyline,” but really?

  58. Mibbitmaker
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

    A3G: Well, we do have LuAnn’s sassy relative and Tommie’s brassy relative there busting with fun personalities. All they need is the tazer lady from down the hall to stand in for Margo and we have the alternate universe Apartment 3G Josh speaks of.

  59. Little Guy
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:21 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#y192):
    @wossname (#y235):

    Commodore VIC-20, my first machine, though the cool kids had Trash-80s already. And I thought I was a newbie because I used blazing 300 baud. But I did learn BASIC in High School (first year Computer classes were offered — lucked out) on an Apple II.

  60. tb4000
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:26 pm [Reply]

    Snuff Film: Maw needs to be less worried about Tater not gorging himself on greasy condiments and more about the fact that he seems to have that Benjamin Button disease.

  61. Just Call Me E
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    @LUJBEM FEJF (#32): Mark will just PUNCH that gun right out of the Senator’s hands!

  62. ElkMeadow
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    Ack! Is anyone else having trouble with a really jumpy site?

    For example, I go to open a link at queek’s #11, look at the pic, go “That’s so sweet!”, go the return button. I get returned to #11 for a second, and the site jumps up to #1, so I have to scroll back down to #11 and go through the hoops all over again.

  63. Uncle Lumpy
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#58):

    Hey, why not Gabriella? She’s spunky, madcap, and vaguely ethnic! “Ay, caramba nemluvím česky!”

  64. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:47 pm [Reply]

    The Bandar Tongue: I want one. I have a lot of greeting cards to get in the mail soon. After Christmas I’d use it for frenching that buttafaced blind date on New Year’s Eve.

  65. Red Greenback
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    @ElkMeadow (#62): I’m experiencing the same hinkiness here, Elk.

  66. wossname
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:52 pm [Reply]

    @ElkMeadow (#62): I haven’t had that problem – but I usually right-click on those links (cute otters and otherwise) and “open in new tab.”

  67. Buck Ripsnort
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#37): Re: Marvin: nobody’s pooped on Jeff, and that’s more dignity than anyone else in Marvin gets.

  68. spike
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#28): Brilliant! Well played, Sir!

    @Mr. Goboto (#51): You’ve forgotten the fact that he’s got Savarna returning in just a few hours. Can you say, “Ménage à trois”? Ithawchacud!

    Speaking of Ghost-Who-Returns-Because-He-Can’t-Write-a-Bad-Thing-About-Himself-in-The-Chronicles [aka Tom Batiuk]: Just when he needs the uniform of some officer in the prison guard, lo and behold! One approaches the warden–and is soon to be knocked out but Our Simpering Hero! Can we foresee the warden walking Stripey and Diana (once Stripey recognizes his Dear Wife) to the gates of the prison a la Notorius?

  69. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

    Pluggers: Plugger toddlers know to put the portable defibrillator in their backpacks when their adults exercise.

    Mary Worth, panel 1: Does everyone who’s not named Jill have a sudden case of constipation? Look at those faces. What say you, Ruthie?

    Mutts: That lady kisses like Elly PatterFOOB ate. By the way, that’s not a compliment, lady, in case you thought it was.

  70. Buck Ripsnort
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

    And it’s Low-Hanging Fruit Day on the comics page!

    FC: Kid, there’s room for your book, your back full of homework AND the tv in that hydrocephalic noggin of yours.

    Zits: I see discipline has paid off for the boy, but is the Nazi Goose-Step really the appropriate reaction here?

    FW and Blondie both go meta today, but at least Dagwood does it for a joke. Batiuk’s just answering the critics. “Of COURSE Lisa had to die,” he thunders, “Otherwise it wouldn’t be WRITING!”

  71. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

    @Little Guy (#59): Commodore VIC-20, Trash-80s. You young whippersnappers had it easy. I started on punch cards. Punch cards made from whale bone. Constant fights with lonely sailors who kept snatching them for scrimshaw. Not so much of a problem after they moved to asbestos cards, but you can guess how that ended.

  72. Mr. Goboto
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

    @spike (#68)re: Ghost-Who-Swings: “I can’t believe it. Now my purple latex pants are chafin’ me! Why don’t you ladies get to know each other a little better while I change.” ber-chicka-ber-ber

  73. Écureuil Écumant
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

    MT: I don’t generally go out of my way to exonerate a politician, but if I were the Senator I’d be feeling mighty sandbagged right about now. I mean he was lookin’ forward to a quiet weekend of huntin’, fishin’, drinkin’, yarnin’, and pissin’ on treetrunks, and now he’s being threatened with a criminal investigation. He smelled something tweaky about this as soon as he saw that fence. Could hardly be blamed for thinking he’s just been set up bigtime.

  74. gnome de blog
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:10 pm [Reply]

    @wossname (#17):
    One is not unmindful of the Didactic Duo’s powers of perception.

  75. Spunde
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

    MW: In panel 1, Adrian looks like she can’t figure out why Elmo invited her over to play but now keeps running away from her.

  76. Écureuil Écumant
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

    FW: “So I’ve become a blurb whore…”

    Huh. That’s what happens when you choose Onan as your muse.

  77. TheDiva
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    @Professor Fate (#29): Yes, but that’s in cases where reviewers or other authors actually have something positive to say about the book, or at least write a few positive-sounding words that can be cut and pasted into something that sort of looks like a rave review if you don’t look at it too closely. Ann Apple has clearly realized that the only person who is going to give a glowing report of Les’ book is Les himself.

  78. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    @ElkMeadow (#62): I’ve noticed it too. I wonder if it’s caused by an ad that sometimes appears just above the #1 comment. Pulls you up to look at it when you refresh.

  79. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

    @wossname (#66): “open link in new tab” is a wonderful thing. Gotta love Firefox for that. (unlike IE, which wants to lock up after one or two new tabs.)

  80. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#71): I feel for you man. That asbestos can cause some real Funky problems.

  81. Daniel
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:22 pm [Reply]

    Non Sequitur is turning into mid-2010 9CL, except with material ripped off from the Marvel Universe, plus a few generalized slams against religion thrown in.

  82. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#80): Ow! Ha ha, ow! Laughing kicks up the old mesothelioma. Did I ever tell you about the keypunch machines? Cross between a Smith-Corona typewriter and an Automatic Dominion waffle iron. Can’t use them sissy cardboard cards in that, I tells ya!

  83. Calico
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#71):
    Haha, my Mom used to program these big honkin’ machines at Fawcett in the 60′s and early 70′s using punch cards.

    Re: Funky, I just did some errands and was listening to CBC Radio One in the car – a woman who had written a book about her child with special needs was being interviewed and she said she didn’t want her book to be “Misery Porn, something that you keep in the bathroom and read a chapter everytime you’re in there.”
    Well, that is exactly what Les Moore is writing. Congratufuckinglations, Les, and the runner-up award goes to Mike Patterfoob.

  84. Calico
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

    @ElkMeadow (#62):
    BurlingtonFreePress.com and WCAX.com do that and I absolutely hate it. It’s a real turn-off to getting the VT news at both sites.

  85. Mysterious Shirtless Lawyer
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:35 pm [Reply]

    Love the WTF expression on Margo’s face as Iris proclaims her omnipresent dykiness. It looks like “Muleskinner Margo” is presented with yet another challenge to her multi-dimensional dominance of the land known as 3-G!

  86. Mela
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:37 pm [Reply]

    @Daniel (#81): I’d say the whole Ekert mess is more a jab at the vaguely defined political/mass media/economic scene that Wiley only tangentially understands than religions, but you’re right in that the poor pacing & bizarre circular storytelling is very remniscient of 9CL.

  87. commodorejohn
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:41 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#71): And your grandfather, he had to carve his own keypunch from mastodon ivory! I understand they have some of his old listings at Lascaux…

  88. Calico
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:43 pm [Reply]

    @Mysterious Shirtless Lawyer (#85):
    What I’d like to see is Margo taking on awful Jill from MW.
    Maybe Jill could date horny Charley from a while back? That could work.

  89. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#87): How did you know? Did you break into my ancestry.com account or something?

  90. Ned Ryerson
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:46 pm [Reply]

    MW: Jill Black punctuates her latest bon mot with a derisive fart.

  91. Scott Bot
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#71): And you had to carry those punch cards five miles, uphill, both ways, in ten feet of snow?

  92. dale
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

    Zits

    Jeremy is taking calculus? What grade is this kid supposed to be in?
    This strip really pissed me off a year or more ago when Jeremy made some remark about “last year’s calculus book”.
    Have the people who write this crap ever even passed a math course?

  93. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:52 pm [Reply]

    @Scott Bot (#91): GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!

  94. ElkMeadow
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

    Well, now I know why Jill is wearing the purple outfit.

  95. Uncle Lumpy
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:53 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#79):

    Time for me to plug Cool Previews again — it’s a lookahead plug-in for Firefox that pops up a preview when you hover a link, then sticks it on a tab, bookmarks it, opens it in a new window, etc.

    Combined with Comic Strip Archive, it is just the best comics browser ever.

    Seriously, if you use Firefox®, go download it now — you won’t regret it.

  96. terrapin
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:54 pm [Reply]

    The fact that Snuffy Smith is still in the paper leads me to believe that somewhere in the world ther are thousands of feeble minded neanderthals just slappin’ thar knees silly at todays’ offerin’.

  97. dale
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:58 pm [Reply]

    @ElkMeadow (#62):
    Yes. Don’t have to touch any buttons. Maybe move the mouse.

  98. commodorejohn
    October 20th, 2010 at 1:59 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#89): Nah. The listings are right next to a depiction of ritual clown-slaying, so I just put two and two together (incidentally, the purpose of one of the listings.)

  99. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

    @dale (#92): I’d be surprised if there weren’t juniors taking some form of pre-calc these days, perhaps in AP courses. A lot of the incoming freshmen when I hit college had at least a half-year, if not full year of calc in high school. (my school had “senior math” which wasn’t. . . . My testing into calc classes turned into a major GPA suck.) That was over two decades ago, fwiw.

    Not sure if Jeremy is supposed to be a sophomore? If so, that does seems early to be taking calc.

  100. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:01 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#99): errr, half to full year of *pre-calc* in high school.

  101. Pozzo
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:09 pm [Reply]

    Tater doesn’t like gravy? Guess we won’t be seeing him in Pluggers any time soon.

  102. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#93): I believe Mark Trail said that to Cherry.

  103. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:11 pm [Reply]

    @commodorejohn (#98): Wow, you’re really on the ball. For some reason most archaeologists mistake the harlequin roast tableaux for an auroch barbecue.

  104. BigTed
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:14 pm [Reply]

    “Tommie’s Aunt Iris” is obviously Tommie pulling a “Mrs. Doubtfire.” Soon she’ll have Margo and Lu Ann dating appropriate men and eating their vegetables — at which point she’ll take off the glasses and wig and reveal herself, much to everyone’s disappointment.

  105. Lurker Bob
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:19 pm [Reply]

    MT: Poor Mark, there isn’t a whisker in sight and he doesn’t know who to punch. The closest thing to facial hair is Rustina’s pet deer. Maybe we’ll get lucky and he’ll punch the little deer into submission.

  106. McManx
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:32 pm [Reply]

    Snuffy — Or it could be that Lil’ Tater was just served up a plate of only butter, sour cream and gravy, which means the nutritional values in Hootin’ Hollar are even more terrible than we could have ever imagined.

    Mark Trail — Mark is obviously working towards establishing a unicameral form of government by eliminating the Senate, one senator at time.

    Spiderman — “I had planned to make you my wife… because with these 3D glasses you really pop out of the background.”

  107. Peanut Gallery
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:37 pm [Reply]

    Trail Season! FIRE!

  108. Little Guy
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:40 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#71): Then again, you could have had a set of Napier’s bones made from whale bone.

  109. Mr. Goboto
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:43 pm [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#107): Be vewy vewy quiet!!!! I’m hunting Mawk Twails!!!

  110. Écureuil Écumant
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:46 pm [Reply]

    PBS: Even math weens know the key to success with this icebreaker is knowing where to truncate pi. NOTE: Longer is not always better! 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169 gets ‘em just about every time.

    PS – Bing, I DON’T CARE if Celine Dion is hospitalized. Not nice to carjack my cursor.

  111. Little Guy
    October 20th, 2010 at 2:56 pm [Reply]

    @dale (#92): Senior year, we had Calculus. I’m thinking it was Honors, which made College Freshman Calc a breeze.

    Still (and about damn time on-topic), nice hoochie dance by Jeremy and Mom.

  112. Chip Whittle
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:00 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#99):

    I’d be surprised if there weren’t juniors taking some form of pre-calc these days, perhaps in AP courses. A lot of the incoming freshmen when I hit college had at least a half-year, if not full year of calc in high school.

    Heck, I had precalc in sophomore year, and calculus junior and senior. I was in a magnet program for math and science, but students outside it could still get through to being hopelessly confused by sequences and series well before the prom.

    Brenda Starr changed into Mark Trail so gradually I didn’t even notice. I hope she finally gets around to punching somebody in between all the stories she isn’t writing.

    Dick Tracy would be so awesome if this storyline were abandoned and it was just revealed Tracy’s been living in a crazy delusional dream-world as a self-appointed vigilante with a handful of sad, schizophrenic true believers ever since the “White Event” back in 1986.

    Get A Life!: Empty promises, calculated betrayal, sociopathic greed… Hey, does anybody have a calendar? Anyone?

    Ginger Meggs seems to have won the “Let’s have our lead character get eaten by a yeti” contest, a major upset for everyone betting on Lio and Agnes.

    Heathcliff is, once again, completely mad. I mean, we’re talking Dick Tracy levels here, although weird-mad instead of homicidally-dangerous-mad.

    Last Kiss somehow got the proof sheets for Bizarro and decided to up the Wonder Woman quotient. And leaves me wondering, back in the continuities where Wonder Woman was clay brought to life (she was clay brought to life in some continuities, right?) could she take a bath or would she turn into a mud monster? I should probably be getting more sleep.

    Ronaldinho Gaucho: “It’s a cake! That’s why I held it like a soccer ball and didn’t put it on a pan or plate like every real cake ever! And why it held its shape with an internal strength unknown to any edible cake-type matter ever!”

  113. wossname
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:03 pm [Reply]

    @McManx (#106):

    a plate of only butter, sour cream and gravy

    Sounds pretty close to poutine.

  114. Little Guy
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    Sunday’s PBS: (Way late, but I scanned the comments to make sure I didn’t tread on the same ground). Pastis misspelled “B-E-A-G-E-L”.

  115. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:20 pm [Reply]

    @dale (#92): Zits reminded me of a real egotistical family I used to go to church with. They had a kid in high school who was rapidly running out of CP and AP courses to take (and, of course, he got A’s in everything he touched). The family asked me (for what reason, I don’t know) what the kid should try next. I recommended enrolling in the local community college and taking college algebra. The response I got was a rolling of the eyes and “He’s already finished AP Calculus.”

    My wife’s retort: “So, he’s got the 1st week of college algebra covered. Good for him! Good luck on weeks 2-12.” I really adore my wife.

  116. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:22 pm [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#95): I’ll do this just as soon as I get Firefox compiled for my VIC-20 :)

    (This might not be a joke — I’m sure one of my colleagues is attempting the compile as I type.)

  117. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:22 pm [Reply]

    @McManx (#106): “a plate of only butter, sour cream and gravy…” explains Loweezy’s pendulous tatas and mammoth badonkadonk. Outside this strip, does anyone else in the comics use a belt for a brassiere? Other than Slim in Gasoline Alley, that is.

  118. Écureuil Écumant
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

    @116 Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol said:

    @Uncle Lumpy (#95): I’ll do this just as soon as I get Firefox compiled for my VIC-20 :)

    Now you two knock that off! You already got me dragging out my 6510 assembler docs and cracking my 64 hardware manual to remind me how to poke the screen. Just what the world needs.

  119. ArchieNemesis
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

    @Artist formerly known as Ben (#37): Yeah Mark Trail seems like he’s about to go all Taxi Driver on everybody.

  120. CanuckDownSouth
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:30 pm [Reply]

    @dale (#92): What with 2 levels of AP calculus, we have some incoming students who’ve taken a full year of high school calc. I think they tend to test out of one semester of calculus, but that’s not my department.

    #115, that reminds me of my brother the high school teacher’s advice to all AP students: take the college course too, even if you could jump ahead. (We were comparing the amount of calc in my 1st-year physics exams vs those in AP.)

  121. commodorejohn
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:32 pm [Reply]

    @Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol (#116): Well, not the VIC-20 and not Firefox, but there is a web browser for the C64…

  122. Alex
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:40 pm [Reply]

    Billy looks like he just watched The Ring video.

  123. boojum
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:42 pm [Reply]

    Is calculus not pretty universally offered to high school seniors now? I took calc my senior year — and that was 40 years ago. Placed out of calculus in college. True, my public high school had a good math program, but I didn’t think it was that far ahead of its time.

  124. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 3:46 pm [Reply]

    @Écureuil Écumant (#118): “You already got me…cracking my 64 hardware manual to remind me how to poke the screen.” Please wear proper protection. [whispers] 4 quarters in the men’s room at the truck stop…

    I can imagine what the ER doc would write in your chart for Reason for Visit. By the way, has anyone seen Dingo recently?

  125. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:04 pm [Reply]

    @boojum (#123): It seems to be offered around here, but I also notice that a lot of the high schoolers I’m associated with end up taking it again in college because they don’t get the basic concepts down fully on the 1st go around.

  126. Mr. Goboto
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:04 pm [Reply]

    @Chip Whittle (#112): Mega bonus points for the Justice reference!

  127. Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:10 pm [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#120): I wonder about the practicality of some AP courses actually is. I’ve already mentioned what I think of AP Calc, and I’m on record that the tech/computer programs in my school district give students a very false sense of entitlement and accomplishment vis a vis the “real IT world”.

    But, my experience with AP Physics actually was the complete opposite. AP Physics, for me anyway, was much more difficult that anything I ran into in college, and I majored in Atmospheric Physics. Maybe there’s just some fundamental disconnect between AP programs and college programs — that’s why, when my kids are old enough, they are going to be encouraged to skip large portions of high school and attend classes at the local CC instead. Since my kids go to private school anyway, it may actually end up saving me money.

  128. Artist formerly known as Ben
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:14 pm [Reply]

    @ArchieNemesis (#119): Oh man. That would be something, filming Mark Trail in the style of early Scorscese. Only the lead actor would put weird emphasis in his sentences. “Are you talking to me?”

  129. Uncle Lumpy
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:26 pm [Reply]

    @Écureuil Écumant (#118):

    6510! Oh, you kids with your onboard clock generators and 6-bit I/O! Give me a rugged NMOS 6502 and I’ll piggy-back the 2102s (No, they’re not “LS”!) to bring the memory space up to 2K, stuffed with manly assembler code.

  130. This Guy
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:29 pm [Reply]

    9CL: Man, if he drove her head-first into the floor right now, he would be one of the greatest heroes in all fiction. People the world over would acclaim him as the Burber-Slayer… if anything like reality held sway in this strip.

    EC: Turns out October is also Cheek-Mouth Awareness Month. Who knew?

    FW: “Okay, but if there are more interviews, I’ll need a dictionary so I can look up what this ‘happy ending’ phrase means. Who ever heard of such a thing?”

    PBS: C’mon, Goat, at least tell her about Euler’s identity.

    SS: Why can’t the inhabitants of Hootin’ Holler laugh without sticking their hideous tongues out? Is it the result of centuries of inbreeding?

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#99): I took pre-calc when I was a high school junior, and a full year of AP calculus as a senior. Even though the course was a semester of differential and a semester of integral and I got a 4 on the AP exam, I still had to take a semester of integral calc in college.

    @Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol (#115): Man, college algebra at your local 2-year school must be way the hell different than at my local 2-year school, if that’s the case. I don’t think our MAT 1111 teaches anything I didn’t cover in high school.

  131. Mr. Goboto
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:36 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#130) FW: Maybe she meant that Les should offer folks a handy-J for reading his book.

  132. Pharmacistrix
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

    @Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol (#127):
    One of my sons completed his last year of HS at the local CC, but it was because he was expelled for possession of the evil weed on school grounds. I wouldn’t recommend that approach.

  133. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:44 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#124): Dingo might be posting under another name… like “ms. docweasel” or “gnome de blog”!

  134. cj
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:48 pm [Reply]

    A4G:
    “Aunt Iris” looks like Sarah Palin. Ew.

  135. CanuckDownSouth
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:50 pm [Reply]

    @Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol (#127): I honestly wouldn’t know. We simply don’t allow students to skip any part of the intro physics sequence no matter how much AP they’ve taken, or their scores. One colleague told me the AP physics around here is sometimes not done well (presumably that would show up in test scores).

    The practical gain to a student might be to allow them to have more semesters of physics in high school, so it doesn’t become something they did once in 3 years.

    I came through the Canadian system, no AP, every science every year (I dropped bio in grade 11), math every year as a basic graduation requirement (although it only went through algebra, geometry, trig – no calc). My points of reference are quite different from those of students here.

  136. Jamus The Bartender
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:56 pm [Reply]

    Dick Tracy: Oh dear Lord…so it was the government who forced themselves onto Dick without his consent…..oh dear….

  137. Jamus The Bartender
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:58 pm [Reply]

    Gasoline Alley: “Casting your bread on the waters” is all fine and dandy, it’s the catching the lady bus driver’s jugs off the side of a cliff that’s got everyone a little touchy, so to speak.

  138. Krazy Kat
    October 20th, 2010 at 4:58 pm [Reply]

    Does the A3G artist just have a clipart template of Margo making that face in the second panel? If not, it’d probably not be a bad idea to make one. It’d probably save a lot of time over the long run.

  139. Dood
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

    What is that amoeba-like piece of framed artwork on the wall of 3-G?

  140. UncleJeff
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

    All this computer talk!
    Two weeks ago, we had an open house at our new high school and I sat in on an advanced algebra class taught with the assistance of a “smart board” (which combines whiteboard and computer technology and can even link into the work done by students on their own laptops with wireless technology).
    After about 20 minutes, I felt like Jeffy of the Family Circus.

  141. Jamus The Bartender
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:01 pm [Reply]

    Spider Man: HA! I knew it :) Marvel villans ALWAYS play out of their league.

  142. Jamus The Bartender
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    Slylock Fox: Actually, if you put the eggs on a hard boil for two minutes, then cover them for ten after shutting off the fire, the eggs peel nice as anything.

  143. KarMann
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    Woo hoo! Got my “work them like a claw” t-shirt in the mail today! Pics to follow.

  144. UncleJeff
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:03 pm [Reply]

    Zits: Very funny today. Laugh out loud funny.

  145. Dood
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:05 pm [Reply]

    @Krazy Kat (#138): That’s Margo’s (“Stay on target”) eyebrow-deployment (“Stay on target”) look (“Proton torpedos away!”).

  146. Jamus The Bartender
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:05 pm [Reply]

    Sally Forth: Wow. I’m thinking it’s pretty much an uphill battle for Sally, being the only grownup in her family, AND at work. I wonder what kind of underwear Sally wears to work…

  147. Mr. Goboto
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:14 pm [Reply]

    @Dood (#139): Lu Ann’s finally finished her series of 5,372 fern paintings and has moved on to microbes, which could actually be interesting.

    @Jamus The Bartender (#146): She doesn’t. It’s one hedonistic little pleasure she allows herself as a reward for putting up with everyone else’s immature BS.

  148. True Fable
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:21 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#11): GOAT! Goats don’t read. They go where they please. Because they are goats, and that is all the reason they need.

    And it’s finally out that although Les doesn’t trust his daughter on a Car Date because she might turn into a slut, he readily acknowledges that he himself is an Attention Whore. Oh, he didn’t say attention? Doesn’t matter, he is one just the same.

    Since when could Funky Winkerbean get away with the word “Whore” but Zits can’t say “suck” and Luann can’t get past first base? Hell, Luann doesn’t even bunt.

  149. Bennui
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:25 pm [Reply]

    Aunt Iris doesnt need help with her things.. because she’s a MAN Baby!

  150. Cliff Arroyo
    October 20th, 2010 at 5:45 pm [Reply]

    I’m totally cool with replacing Luann and Tommie with Ruby and Iris, but Margo stays and Bobbie makes a comeback, downing pills and packing heat.

    Better yet, the cool girls (Ruby, Iris, Margo and Bobbie) get to pick on and humiliate eternal victims Luann, Tommie, Doris and Margo’s real mother whose name I have too much self-respect to remember. (Actually she’s okay, but can’t compete with my dear, crazy, psycotic Bobbie, my favorite 3g guest star ever.)

  151. zerowolf
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:00 pm [Reply]

    It’s time for the Comic Pages Smackdown Play Downs. The winner of Mary Worth vs. Jill Black will take on the winner of Margo Magee vs. Aunt Iris in steel cage death match.

  152. Uncle Lumpy
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:04 pm [Reply]

    @Cliff Arroyo (#150):

    Margo’s real mother whose name I have too much self-respect to remember

    Not me: Gabriella!

  153. zerowolf
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:04 pm [Reply]

    Lost Forest Headline News:

    Nature write Mark Trail was killed in a tragic hunting accident….

  154. zerowolf
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:08 pm [Reply]

    Crankenstein: An old man, a ladder, leaves in the gutter; this strip might have a happy ending yet.

  155. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:09 pm [Reply]

  156. zerowolf
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:13 pm [Reply]

    Luann: I can just about imagine what TJ would really like to ask Dirk. “You must get dirty and sore hauling all that garbage. Would you like to stop in for a shower and a massage?”

  157. eleven toes
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:26 pm [Reply]

    Wooeee! You people shore are smart! They let me leave hi skrewl whenst I was able to count to 21 with out takin off mah shoes. In the snow. Without’n no fancy punchcards thingys. I did go to the AP oncet, but I gotta tell ya, its mighty hard to beat the Piggly Wiggly.

  158. Bobbie Merrill
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:35 pm [Reply]

    @Cliff Arroyo (#150): Why thank you! You seem to be a very attractive young man. Are you ever in upstate New York? Please come look me up at the Upstate Home for the Wealthy and Ditsy! Do you like radiators? Do you have a prescription pad?

  159. dale
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:40 pm [Reply]

    HS Calc

    I didn’t have a problem with someone taking it. (I had a year of it 45 yrs. ago and tested out of a year of college calc.)
    My first objection was that I don’t think Jeremy is far enough along / old enough to have squeezed in some other useful stuff, like trig.
    The other was that Jeremy took calc. several years ago and is still in HS.

  160. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 20th, 2010 at 6:58 pm [Reply]

    o dear!

    a fennec getting his ears cleaned by a cat. SQUEEE!

  161. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 20th, 2010 at 7:56 pm [Reply]

  162. Carl Barks Fan
    October 20th, 2010 at 8:34 pm [Reply]

    LUANN: Here’s a serious question. Has it been established that TJ is gay? Has it been implied? I don’t remember him ever going out on a date with anybody. But a lot of snarkers seem to think so.

  163. Heyo
    October 20th, 2010 at 8:45 pm [Reply]

    FW: Maybe Les hates “happy endings” since he was shafted by a Vietnamese prostitute after Lisa died. Explains a lot.

  164. Uncle Lumpy
    October 20th, 2010 at 8:49 pm [Reply]

    @Carl Barks Fan (#162):

    Not that I know of. There was an attempt to give him a sympathetic back story a while ago — he’s Argentine? And his dad abandoned him without even a farewell frolic? But IIRC he’s been shown flirtin’ deftly with the ladies, usually contrasted with Brad’s clumsy fumblin’.

  165. commodorejohn
    October 20th, 2010 at 8:52 pm [Reply]

    @Carl Barks Fan (#162): No, it’s Thai prostitutes you get “shafted” by. I think.

  166. Jamus The Bartender
    October 20th, 2010 at 8:52 pm [Reply]

    @Carl Barks Fan (#162): It wouldn’t matter. Aaron Hill, who Luann used to stalk was supposed to be gay, but Evans flaked on that one.

  167. Walker of Dog
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:01 pm [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#152):

    Not me: Gabriella!

    Well, which one is it?

  168. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:30 pm [Reply]

    A3G — Tommie’s “Aunt Iris” is… SALLY JESSY RAPHAEL???

  169. Scott Bot
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:34 pm [Reply]

    @[Old Man] Muffaroo (#161): Perhaps Tater is Ron White as a child, before they called him ‘Tater Salad.’

  170. AndyL
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:50 pm [Reply]

    Oh man, I can’t believe that Josh didn’t feature Mark Trail panel #2. That is classic. Classic.

  171. zerowolf
    October 20th, 2010 at 9:56 pm [Reply]

    @Carl Barks Fan (#162): Portraying TJ as gay is just snark. The strip has never addressed TJ having a love interest of any gender. So the best one can surmise is TJ is asexual.

  172. bats :[
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:00 pm [Reply]

    @zerowolf (#171): and here I thought TJ was just plain creepy.

  173. terrapin
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:00 pm [Reply]

    @Carl Barks Fan (#162): I believe he and Brad were rivals for Toni at one time. And yes, I am ashamed that I remember that.

  174. KarMann
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:01 pm [Reply]

    As promised, pic of me (Randy) in the “call me Randy!” JP T-shirt:
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/8714136@N08/5101096324/
    Now all I need is some chopsticks….

  175. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:03 pm [Reply]

    @zerowolf (#171): TJ is aesexual? OH NOES! He reproduces by splitting…without a woman involved? The human race is doomed.

    @KarMann (#174): Work it like a claw, Randy!

  176. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:09 pm [Reply]

    @zerowolf (#171): So the best one can surmise is TJ is asexual.
    “Oh, I don’t know. I can surmise quite a bit.”

  177. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:12 pm [Reply]

  178. hibbleton
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

    A3G: guest starring Andy Dick as auntie Iris.

  179. greghousesgf
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:17 pm [Reply]

    Snuffy’s tongue hanging out is making me nervous, I think he wants to eat Tater.

  180. Walker of Dog
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:17 pm [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#95): Thanks for the Cool Previews recommendation – that’s going to be a handy add-on.

  181. Married Agnostic Woman
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:27 pm [Reply]

    My daughter’s taking Algebra II/Trig as an 8th grader, but she is far from typical–she and 15 others in her class did so well on the state standardized test that they got bumped from the regular “honors math” (one grade level ahead) in 5th grade to Algebra I in 6th. This year, the middle school doesn’t even have an Algebra II teacher, so rather than bus them to the high school several miles away, they are taking the class online (in “the crappy old computer lab” with flickery CRT screens. Nothing but the best, right?)

    So, Jeremy is probably a freak :) like she is. And before you say “He doesn’t seem like a super brain,” well, neither does she, really. I’ve had to bribe her with the promise of a graphics tablet for her computer if she gets all A’s this trimester–it’s actually gotten her to do and turn in her homework! Art is her true love, just as music seems to be Jeremy’s.

    I’d say that Zits is a refreshing view of a gifted character who isn’t a stereotypical geeky nerd…or the cartoonist forgot that calculus usually comes at the end of high school, not the beginning.

  182. This Guy
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

    @Married Agnostic Woman (#181): Jeremy has always struck me as being classically Book Dumb–but then, so did Calvin, and Calvin was actually pretty smart (even accounting for the fact that Watterson intentionally gave him a huge vocabulary.)

  183. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:34 pm [Reply]

    So, I remember as a kid I’d go over to Charles Babbage’s house and he’d let me play on his mechanical computer.

    I’d be playing away on Pong version 1.0 and I’d say, “Hey, Mrl. B. I bet you could really trick this thing out if you had some microchips.”

    He answered, “Yeah, man. But they won’t be invented for over 100 years. Bummer.”

    “Yeah.” I replied. “Bummer.”

  184. This Guy
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:37 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#183): I’m not going to get into the “I’m much older than you” contest, but I did hear Nolan Bushnell speak at a game developers’ conference recently. It was enlightening.

  185. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:43 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#184): Whoa! Living dinosaur.

  186. gleeb
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:50 pm [Reply]

    The Other Coast: I’m glad to see a shout-out to Cook & Moore’s “Frog & Peach” sketch.

  187. Baka Gaijin
    October 20th, 2010 at 10:59 pm [Reply]

    @This Guy (#184): I inspired Nolan Bushnell to create Chuck E. Cheese’s Pizza Time Theatre in 1976, where, in appreciation, he immortalized me forever in the animatronic Jasper T. Jowls. That was, of course, after I finished smithing brass cogs for Charles Babbage for his last, lamented, unfinished engine. Not long afterward I designed the one-piece bathing suit Bo Derek wore in “10″ on a Xerox Alto. I invited Steve Jobs over to critique the design. He got “inspired” then visited PARC and the rest is history. [*]

  188. Sequitur
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:16 pm [Reply]

    @Baka Gaijin (#187): Yeah, I know how that inspiration gig goes. I was the inspiration for the character “Liver Lips” for the Country Bear Jamboree. [*]

  189. KT
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:19 pm [Reply]

    One Big Happy:

    “Take a PICTURE”?! What the hell happened to “Good art by Ruthie, drawed while you wait”? You wanna show what irritated snakes look like, you can jolly well draw it yourself, Little Miss Artist!

  190. Tophat
    October 20th, 2010 at 11:42 pm [Reply]

    Hey, I’ve always wondered. Is Snuffy Smith laughing or just having a seizure?

  191. Sequitur
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:01 am [Reply]

    @Tophat (#190): Snuffy laughs with the laugh of the insane who quaff the nectar of impure corn squeezings.

  192. ElkMeadow
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:25 am [Reply]

    Les is always sad. He just needs to look sadder. After all, Lisa’s dead, so why should he be happy? Speaking of Lisa, why isn’t her ghost haunting the place?

  193. seann
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:30 am [Reply]

    Margo quietly sizes up new prey, while billy retells a 25 year old far side joke. Badly.

  194. bats :[
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:36 am [Reply]

    10/21

    MT: Frank, you are a dead man. D-E-A-D.

  195. ElkMeadow
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:37 am [Reply]

    Oh man, did anyone else know that Doonesbury just had its 40th anniversary?

  196. Mibbitmaker
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:39 am [Reply]

    (time for my Letterman rip-off)

    Yep, poor Jill Black continues to be the paper tiger to be wrong so Mary Worth can always be right. I dunno, though… I still like her.

    She reminds me of Daria all grown up.
    She reminds me of that 4th grade girl who won’t share her dolly.
    She reminds me of Margo Magee: The Early Years.
    She reminds me of a bad Ann Coulter impersonator.
    She reminds me of a robot puppet too snarky to use on MST3K.
    She reminds me of the girl you deliberately let get away.
    She reminds me of a living mother-in-law joke.
    She reminds me of someone rejected from the Algonquin (sp?) Round Table.
    She reminds me of The View!
    She reminds me of a Kristen Wiig character.
    She reminds me of the annoying worker at the DMV.
    She reminds me of a spousal argument at the next table at a restaurant.
    She reminds me of someone who’d get a pie in the face for a cathartic laugh in a comedy skit.
    She reminds me of the bad example in an educational short film from the 1950s.
    She reminds me of a more pathetic soap opera bad girl.
    She reminds me of any female’s ex best friend.
    She reminds me of every spoiled, petulant teenager you’ve ever seen in real life or pop culture.

  197. Poteet
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:39 am [Reply]

    OBH — Ruthie, banging on the glass in the reptile house is a bad thing to do, and if your parents and teachers haven’t told you that, they should. Better yet, there should be signs posted and a staff member on hand to stop it.

  198. ElkMeadow
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:40 am [Reply]

    And while Mark, Frank, Senator, Sweetie and Lucky are all standing around, the rest of the hunting party have been getting their kills.

  199. Poteet
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:42 am [Reply]

    10/21 — It’s good to see MT is finally showing readers one of the worst conservation problems in this country today — giant-mutant-fawn-kicking. The horror, the horror.

  200. Sequitur
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:42 am [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#194): Ah! By that do you mean mama deer will return and gorge the hell out of Frank or that he just kicked his political aspirations up a fawn’s ass to die?

  201. Mibbitmaker
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:46 am [Reply]

    10/21 A3G: Nice try, Margo.

  202. ElkMeadow
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:47 am [Reply]

  203. KT
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:48 am [Reply]

    Mark Trail 10/21:

    Heh! I love the look of astonishment on the fawn’s face. Like, “WTF?!?! He KICKED me!! Picard never KICKED me!”

  204. Poteet
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:53 am [Reply]

    10/20

    A3G — I’m taking notes in case any of my nieces ever move to NYC. Of course my own opening line would be “Before I put my luggage down, tell me right now if there are any bed bugs in this building.”

    MW — Whoa. I always knew I never wanted to help anyone pick out a wedding dress. At least not without a hip flask.

    PHANTOM — On one hand, I find Diana’s courage inspiring. On the other hand, I can’t figure out what the hell she’s doing with her fist. Is she punching that bun, or what?

  205. Sequitur
    October 21st, 2010 at 12:54 am [Reply]

    10-21

    SM: Okay, this is beginning to creep me out. Good thing it’s only Spider-man.

  206. Poteet
    October 21st, 2010 at 1:01 am [Reply]

    10/21

    FC — This would be nauseating enough without the big drop of drool. I may never eat breakfast again.

    JP — “And for pushing my cause with Neddy, of course. Your share also depends on pressuring her into having dinner with me once a week.”

  207. Poteet
    October 21st, 2010 at 1:02 am [Reply]

    10/20 S-M — Don’t be too quick to turn him down, Aunt May. It’s not as if your current love life is so exciting.

  208. Mibbitmaker
    October 21st, 2010 at 1:03 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#204): re: Phantom: Looks like she’s grabbing the bun. Adversaries of Margo Magee take note.

  209. Farley's Revenge
    October 21st, 2010 at 1:48 am [Reply]

    @KT (#203): Ooohhh! Nice ST:DS9 reference!

    I think Mark should make an exception to his facial hair requirement and start punching* the crap out of Frank. Given how full of crap Frank is, it could take a few strips before Mark finishes that unpleasant task.

    *I would have mentioned the Fist O’ Justice but that might have been mistaken for “fisting the crap out of Frank”, which would, thank all that is holy, never make it past the Censor Sheep.

  210. Farley's Revenge
    October 21st, 2010 at 1:58 am [Reply]

    And it would still be an unpleasant task for all involved, particularly us, the readers.

  211. This Guy
    October 21st, 2010 at 2:25 am [Reply]

    10/21
    Crank: The old lady’s just wondering whether she can sound convincing on the phone. “Oh–there’s been a terrible accident! I think my neighbor might be dead! Please, come as soon as you can!”

    DT: So they explain abbreviations that are well-known to anyone who’s ever seen any cop show, but refuse to explain the hideous clusterfuck of madness that is this strip?

    FC: Thel’s plan to serve the kids vodka with their breakfast is working…

    GA: I have to admit that second panel puts Jackelrod to shame.

    GF: “The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!”

    Pluggers: “Some”?

    @KT (#203): And a semi-obscure DS9 reference, too. Respect knuckles over IP.

  212. dale
    October 21st, 2010 at 2:36 am [Reply]

    MT

    Frank should have started with, “Get off my property!”, followed by, “You’ve been warned about trespassing.” and “If you come near my daughter again, I’ll have you locked up.”

    It may not be too late to try, “I told your mother not to let you keep that thing. It’s illegal.”

    Why hasn’t Beth followed Katie to the scene and does she have an escape plan?

  213. This Guy
    October 21st, 2010 at 3:01 am [Reply]

    10/21 cont’d:
    CdS: A neutrino or even a photon would be too slow for Loris. (“Light speed’s too slow!?”) She’d do better dressing as a tachyon. Sure, they’ve never been shown to exist, but if kids can dress up as ghosts etc., then why the hell not?

    Curtis: Is this “Tekk-Tron 1000″ meant to be a game console, meaning that Billingsley didn’t do any research on video games, or is it just meant to be a Herb & Jamaal-style generic item, meaning Billingsley didn’t do any research on anything?

  214. Mr. O'Malley
    October 21st, 2010 at 3:58 am [Reply]

    @This Guy (#211): GA The second panel is very nice. A few more trees on the nearest hill would make it look a bit less like it had been clear-cut. Not trying to do three panels here is a good plan.

    Seeing MT drawn like this would be great. This shows it could be done.

    Seeing MT drawn like the first panel I’m not so enthusiastic about. It’s bad enough the way it is.

    If only the plots had something to do with nature, wildlife and environmental issues, it would have the potential to be a great strip.

    (The last story I remember dealing with wildlife concerns was “Don’t give a side of bacon to a mountain lion”. Good advice, no doubt, but hardly a pressing issue in environmental management.)

  215. Jason1981
    October 21st, 2010 at 4:09 am [Reply]

    S-M: Wow, Mole Man sure gets over rejection quickly. The hell with Spidey– Mole Man is the one that deserves his own comic strip.

    MT: Mark’s just surprised because a guy WITHOUT sideburns or facial hair is being a jerk.

    FW: They’re in Westview. What facial expression other than “sad” would he possibly make? Hmm, well there’s “dead from Cancer”…

    reFOOB: I’m on Mike’s side with this one. Homework sucks.

  216. John C Fremont
    October 21st, 2010 at 6:24 am [Reply]

    MT – Uh, Frank, I don’t think Lucky understands your hostility towards him. Say, that gives me a great idea for a new T-shirt. Now where the hell are the good scissors?

  217. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 21st, 2010 at 6:55 am [Reply]

    Drabble — Today’s strip breaks down the fourth wall… and then some!

    Edge City — Where’s the “funny” in this current storyline? Are we supposed to be amused by the fact that Len’s elderly mother is too obstinate or afraid to have knee surgery? The alternative — that the reader is forced to watch her deal with the agonizing pain and limited mobility for a period of days/months/years — is a situation more suited to “Crankshaft” than “Edge City”!

  218. Flummoxicated
    October 21st, 2010 at 7:02 am [Reply]

    MT: Wow, kicking a baby deer. Did I mention I am loving this story arc?

    FW: This is an open plea to Tom Batiuk – Please get help. The world of misery you’ve created in this strip is indicative of a crippling depression. I am from Northeast Ohio, and while the weather there can get gray and cold thanks to Lake Erie, it isn’t the gloom world you’ve depicted. And please stop doing this “writing”. I think when you say “writing” you mean “indulging your inner Mary Sue”. (I would link to the Wikipedia article on the subject but apparently my html-fu stops at bold this morning.)

  219. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 21st, 2010 at 7:22 am [Reply]

    @Flummoxicated (#218): the wiki link to Mary Sue? The TV Tropes version has examples!

  220. Mela
    October 21st, 2010 at 7:28 am [Reply]

    Well, today’s the day that did it. I’ve grown so sick of Tom Batiuk masturbating in public over his “embracing” of misery as the great truth of existence that I can’t even snark at FW without wishing he’d die already. Anyone who thinks that he’s THAT glorious and that the world is THAT blinded to it deserves nothing. The fact that his strip is still fondly regarded for what it was twenty years ago while newer, better strips die premature deaths by readers says everything that needs to be said about why the newspaper comics field is a shambles. Call me when he finally cacks it. I can’t even pity him and tell him to get help; it’s clear that he thinks he’s above it & that those who do get help for their problems are somehow more delusional than he is. A quick peek at his private life and even working area shows that he has willfully disconnected himself from all but maybe one contact at the syndicate. He really is beyond the bend, and the fact that this medium continues to indulge his craziness while pretending it’s still rope climbing & band candy jokes like the good ol’ days is just absurd.

  221. Little Guy
    October 21st, 2010 at 7:30 am [Reply]

    MT: And now, Mark Trail is ripping off its plotlines from Charles Atlas ads on the back of comic books. Watch for an illuminated “Hero of the Forest!” sign in the corner of Saturday’s strip.

  222. KarMann
    October 21st, 2010 at 7:36 am [Reply]

    @Little Guy (#221): Are you sure it’s from Charles Atlas ads? I thought maybe they were going for more of a Llap Goch kind of vibe.

  223. CanuckDownSouth
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:03 am [Reply]

    O.M.G. – Adrain’s dress *does* have a butt-bow! It’s not as hideous as it could be, they just don’t make ‘em like they used to I suppose, but still, it shows she *did* pick a dress that matches her haircut perfectly.

    And with “we want you to have a third of the shares just for setting it up”, Judge parker jumps the FOOB.

  224. wossname
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:05 am [Reply]

    A3G – “I don’t think I can wait that long” – for what? Is she ordering our gals to fix her a snack? “More cheetos, mule”?

    DT – What is that in panel 2? It appears to be two people who have nothing to do with the story, standing in a place nowhere near the conversation between Dick and Agent Toque. I guess I answered my own question.

    GA – Yes, Hoogy, you killed him, and the giant buzzards from Lost Forest are already circling overhead.

    GT – WTF are those two things floating over the park? The twin moons of Milford? Alien ships waiting to abduct whichever kid that is?

    MT – Who would have thought that the first violence in a MT arc would be fawn-kicking! Surely punching must follow, as Stepfather reveals the depths of his depravity.

    MW – Yeah, I think it’s true – Jill is us.

    Phan – No, dumbass, how could it possibly be Diana’s voice? They called her Prisoner Cole. Your name is Walker. That settles it, Diana’s not here. Better leave again.

    Plug – Some pluggers, Reed? Some???

    RMMD – Is that an “Uh oh, I screwed up” look on Rose?

    S-M – Hmmm… Narration Box told us Aunt May was going to be treated like a queen, but not in the way Petey meant… and now Moleman is leering at her… I’m getting very scared.

  225. black butterfly
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:10 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#224): re DT – I’m pretty certain it’s those two – http://comics.com/dick_tracy/2010-09-12/ – the exposed associates, so to speak.

  226. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:13 am [Reply]

    MT: Is the senator shocked at this flagrant fawn-kicking, or is he thinking, Hmmm… kicking a fawn, huh? Interesting political strategy.

    (And like others, I’m longing for an enraged Mama Deer, sharp hooves flailing with razor intensity, to come leaping over that fence and slice and dice the future Governor Doesn’tstandachance into itsy-bitsy political bits. Sadly, we’ll have to settle for a just a smidgeon of her righteous maternal anger channeled into Mark Trail’s punchy fists.)

    JP: Wow, Jules’s father is some kind of businessman: They just formed a business plan a couple hours ago, and already they’ve gone public!

    SM: You know, MoleGuy, if you’re just looking for anything with two breasts and a vagina, you probably didn’t have to narrow your search to a Broadway dressing room.

    A3G: Margo, as always, is the epitome of hospitality: “Well, if you have to be going…. Nice meeting you! Don’t let the door hit you on your way out!”

    BB: These guys aren’t even trying any more, are they? Cripes.

    FC: I guess breakfast is more important than morning snack, brunch, and pre-lunch. But they all matter; you don’t get asses like those kids have on just one meal a morning.

    MW: Platitudinous smugness vs. sarcastic bullying: I know, of course, which will triumph, so the only question is, how demoralized, stressed, and miserable can they make Adrian in the course of the battle? (My hope? Very.)

  227. Rocky Stoneaxe
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:15 am [Reply]

    DtM — Is that a strand of pubic hair under George’s nose… and more important, HOW did it get there?

    Mark Trail — I don’t recall the details of the storyline from late(?) 2008, but this looks like the exact same pose Elrod used of a character kicking over a PLANT in a fit of pique! Would someone be so kind as to track down the original daily and post a link here?

  228. Terry in Maryland
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:16 am [Reply]

    Oh, an awesome day on the comics page!

    The Ghost who Dithers is still hanging out in the shadows while his wife Diana not only tells off the warden but snatches her weave, too!

    On Mary Worth, we have the set up of an epic wrasslin’ face off. I bet you that Jill has tinfoil hidden on her that she’ll use when the ref is looking the other way!

    The Mean Old Rich Guy kicks a helpless pet fawn in front of his daughter and the Senator and tries to throw Mark Trail off his land. That is one action packed panel! Tomorrow, Mean Old Rich Guy gets assailed by a little girl and viewed with scorn by a politician. Mark doesn’t have to use the Fists of Justice at all.

  229. smacky
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:18 am [Reply]

    MT: Okay, I thought we had peaked on the WTF meter with Trail leaping the fence and threatening a U.S. Senator. Did not see kicking a baby deer in the ass coming. At all.

    Tomorrow a tame rhino wanders into frame to see what’s the commotion. Frank makes the fatal mistake of kicking it in the ass too.

  230. Mela
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:20 am [Reply]

    Okay, here’s today’s stuff.

    9CL: My God, she has a mouth like a knock-off Muppet.

    A3G: Josh’s theory continues to look more & more sound.

    BB: … WHAT?

    Curtis: Strip theme courtesy of Pluggers.

    Edge: It takes a lot to make Abby’s parents look likable, but hey, here we are.

    ReFOOB: We’d see this same dazzling work ethic years later, as he worked on his bestsellers.

    GA: Why is it that this strip channels the spirit of Jackelrod & it’s actually decent looking?

    H&J: Only to plummet after the next recall.

    Luann: Again, quoting Tom Servo – “END! ENNNNNNNNND!!!”

    MT: This might be the best panel ever, if only because the deer makes the same “Bwah?” face as Sassy does getting kicked or run over.

    MW: This had potential to deliver us a giant snark factory with Jill, and instead we get transcriptions of a particularly dull episode of “Say Yes to the Dress”. I can torture myself other ways, dammit.

    MG&G: So seniors are routinely into bestiality?

    Pluggers: This strip is so worth it whenever Reed Hoover shows up and demonstrates how disconnected from modern reality he is with a random topical reference.

    Popeye: Dude, she can probably take down sharks. I wouldn’t mock her.

    Sally Forth: My replacement strip. So far, so gross but amusing.

    6Chix: It has a cell phone in it – it has to be funny!

    Zits: See above.

  231. Plinko Commie
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:46 am [Reply]

    Family Circus: You could rightly assume, based on history, that “breakfast is the most important meal of the morning” is an example of a particularly bland strain of mediocre Jeffyisms. But based on the large drop of drool hanging in the air below his mouth, his need for Mommy’s validation, and her sly, all-knowing smirk, it’s pretty obvious that she’s feeding him 10 meals a day in order to fatten him up and sell him to Sbarros to make low-grade pepperoni. Dolly, having milk and oatmeal with a side of post-meal vomiting this morning, is playing to survive at this point.

    Funky Winkerbean: Clearly someone who hasn’t done due dilligence on her interview subject. Asking Les to look sad is akin to asking Mary Worth to be more assertive in the lives of her neighbors.

    Popeye: What’s worse than getting bitchslapped, Olive? Getting bitchslapped by a MERMAID’S TAIL. If I know anything about physics, and I don’t, someone’s about to catch a whale-sized beatdown.

    Apartment 3-G: You don’t spit in the wind, you don’t tug on Superman’s cape and you don’t mess around with Margo. Just remember, Iris, that if you see Margo’s bun turn red, RUN.

    Crankshaft: Crankshaft’s neighbor is debating whether to call 911 now so he can experience long-term suffering and rehab, or later so she can be reasonably sure he dies. Obviously this isn’t Funky Winkerbean, because there emergency calls are so common, they just dial 9.

    Beetle Bailey: Dialogue by guest artist Bruce Tinsley (Mallard Fillmore). What would make this funnier is if you replaced “illegal immigrants” with “draft dodgers” because if there’s anywhere in America where you can feel safe knowing you won’t see duty in a hot zone, it’s Camp Swampy.

    Hi and Lois: I can buy mermaids named Tuna Salad. I can accept that people want to read Lisa’s Song. I can believe that Hootin’ Holler is a fair representation of Appalachia in 2010. I can even sign off on the Gasoline Alley characters still being alive well into their 100s. But I draw the line here: There’s no such thing as Jacksonville Jaguars fans.

    Dennis the Menace: Or, based on his eyes and walk, it’s a note from his zombie masters.

    Sally Forth: His costume ideas make going to the bathroom difficult? Great, he’s going as Marvin.

  232. wossname
    October 21st, 2010 at 8:56 am [Reply]

    @black butterfly (#225): Oh yeah – I’m sure you’re right. Locher and Brozman should be thrilled that you remembered that scene from six weeks ago (and I’m sure they’d be disappointed in my inability to follow their crystal-clear narrative).

  233. Bootsy
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:05 am [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#129):

    Jesus, that sounded just filthy, Uncle Lumpy.

  234. black butterfly
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:08 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#232): All I can say in my defense is that was the only thing that, you know, actually happened through a whole month of “- He’s dead. – Take a thousand dollars”.

  235. Dennis Jimenez
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:09 am [Reply]

    Luann – TJ really creeps me out – I don’t think I’d let him babysit my kids. Unlike Brad, I think he might do more than just neglect them. Come to think of it, I’d say I’d take Dirk over either of them….

  236. Dood
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:11 am [Reply]

    Can more information about kicking deer be found on the Internet?

  237. Scott Bot
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:15 am [Reply]

    Pluggers – Reed, if you were eighteen and up on every new band on the planet, you still wouldn’t be even close to hip.

    9CW – Ok, I’m gonna catch hell for this, but I thought today’s strip was funny.

    FW – ****bangs head repetatedly on desk****

    MW – These two are gonna beat the crap out of one another.

    Luann – Settle down, TJ. Go take a cold shower.

    MT – In certain parts of the country, a candidate kicking a fawn in the butt would probably give a much needed boost to their approval ratings.

  238. JB
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    Jeepers! I didn’t know Tommie was Sarah Palin’s niece!

  239. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:28 am [Reply]

    GrandAv: two of my least favorite things together: yappy small dogs and Facebook/Twitter gags in the comics.

    GF: this strip used to have more days like this.

    MG&G: unspeakable filth!

    RwO: heeee!

    6C: If this was supposed to be a tie-in, the Funky strip was *months* ago, and the hair color is wrong.

    Zits: Connie, if that’s supposed to be a Batman pose, ur doin it rong.

    OtH: yup, Acme!

  240. Steve the Pocket
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:33 am [Reply]

    Cleats: That must be one strong cape if he thinks it would protect him.

    Doonesbury: This comes to an anticlimax as we all discover that this so-called legend has been recruited as … a salesman.

    Heart of the City: I lol’d.

    Mark Trail: Well… that was not on my list of things I thought I’d see today. Or ever.

    My Cage: Not the best words from someone who just got back from his honeymoon.

    Pluggers: I was going to say “Finally, a Pluggers caption that’s brutally honest,” but then I noticed the “Some.”

  241. Sequitur
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:35 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#224):

    DT – What is that in panel 2? It appears to be two people who have nothing to do with the story, standing in a place nowhere near the conversation between Dick and Agent Toque. I guess I answered my own question.

    Greek chorus.

  242. gleeb
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:40 am [Reply]

    ‘bean: Local teevee? You mean there are people in Cancerdeathville who don’t center their lives on Creepy Les and the lousy pizza joint?

    Mark: The fawn just looks so shocked to be kicked. “Me? Kick me? But I’m adorable!”

    Phantom: No one is safe from Prisoner Bungrabber*!
    *From: The-Prisoner-who-Grabs-Buns.

  243. Scott Bot
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    @wossname (#224): Agent Toque? I thought that was Alice from Dilbert making a guest appearance.

  244. [Old Man] Muffaroo
    October 21st, 2010 at 9:49 am [Reply]

    A whole lotta questions.

    Dick – How many lady feds wearing toques are in this strip, anyway? If there’s supposed to be just one, she’s gradually morphing into something by Patrick Nagel.

    Herb – How many aspirin does Jamaal have to take? — one per inch of skull above the eyes, or is the dose based on how many pounds of cranium?

    Mark – Will it take more than one kick to persuade Zombi that Frank doesn’t wuv him? Will Rustina’s shouted instruction to run give him a clue? How can Zombi get off his property if it’s all fenced? Is it time for Zombi’s Mom to come in and kick ass yet?

    One – “…oh, and Harry Potter.”

    Spidey – Soon, very soon, the Mole Man is going to with he had prescription glasses for his extreme myopia instead of cardboard frames with cut-out slits.

  245. Paul1963
    October 21st, 2010 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    Snuffy: OMFG, the kid’s name really is “Potato.”
    “Potato Smith.” Even Rover Skinner and his wife, the former Hoogy Boogle, would mock that name.

    Snuffy, Loweezy, you both deserve the axe he’s gonna plant in your skulls when he’s about 15.

  246. mrreindeer
    October 21st, 2010 at 3:07 pm [Reply]

    @Holden (#10): The real magic is in Margo’s ability to appear in frame and steal the scene with her expressions while Iris and Luann wildly careen around the apartment.

  247. abercrombie milano
    October 30th, 2010 at 12:56 am [Reply]

    In the city where four seasons are distinctively divided,autumn is short.When it comes to our minds to see the lotuses, they are already bearing the hint of withering.No one told them what time is,yet they follow the way time goes, flowing with the seasons.When it comes to our minds

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