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Mary Worth, 12/15/10

It’s obviously a delight to see Jill sitting on the curb, idly sucking on a wine bottle and wearing what might be called “fuck-me boots” if they weren’t the same hideous shade of purple as her dress. And it’s all good fun to hear her loudly proclaim that she belongs in the gutter. But still, this strip is tinged in melancholy for me, because it clearly represents the first stage in the de-awesomeing of Jill at Mary’s hands. We already know the answer to the core question here — we know that Jill will have her faith in state-sanctioned heterosexual monogamy forcibly restored, and she’ll also swear off booze forever — and now the only suspense remaining is to see if Mary can meddle her back to righteousness in time for Adrian’s wedding tomorrow. If a smiling, bright-eyed Jill catches the bouquet — and the eye of a handsome groomsman — do not be surprised. Be saddened, but not surprised.

Crankshaft, 12/15/10

Oh, look, the supporting cast of Crankshaft is talking about Crankshaft’s genitals, or his prostate, or possibly his lower GI tract! I’m glad to see that this conversation brings sly smiles to everyone’s face, rather than causing them to die inside as one might expect.

Marmaduke, 12/15/10

Actually, now that Marmaduke has killed and eaten Santa, the holiday season has ended rather abruptly.