Mary Worth, 12/10/16
Earlier this week, Mary suggested that the idea that a woman shouldn’t date men significantly younger than them is outdated, sexist dogma — but it was important to analyze your emotional motivations before diving into a sexual relationship quickly after a breakup. Today, Iris muses that the factors that drive us aren’t always cut and dry, and to try to isolate the pure from the petty is fruitless and ultimately paralyzing. This is probably the most emotionally self-actualized Mary Worth storyline in human history, guys!
Speaking of emotional self-actualization, Marvin is still doing jokes about its various characters pissing on things, and frankly doesn’t give a damn what you think about it.
Beetle Bailey, 12/10/16
BREAKING: BEETLE BAILEY ACKNOWLEDGES THAT WOMEN HAVE SEXUAL AUTOMONY, FEMINISM DECLARES DEFINITIVE DEFEAT OF THE PATRIARCHY