Wow, just an out-of-nowhere slam on the Ritz Brothers
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Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/11/23
Hank Jr. and his new bride live with comic book artist “Horrible” Hank Sr., and the most likely interpretation of today’s strip that one of the thing that makes Hank Sr. “Horrible” is that he forces his son and daughter-in-law to watch whatever it is that he wants to watch, even though they’re late middle age adults themselves and there are presumably other TVs or screen-based entertainment devices in the house. But the way he’s phrased it, speculating about the movie “dad has in the player,” kind of implies that they’re going to get home long after Hank Sr. has gone to bed, and watching the movie he’s left for them is their only option because the DVD player has some kind of elaborate lock on it, or maybe because these two simply haven’t figured out which of the buttons is “eject”.
Mary Worth, 3/11/23
“It used to be fun coming into your workplace and not doing work! But now that I have to do work … it’s not fun at all. More of a job, really. I don’t care for it.”
117 replies to “Wow, just an out-of-nowhere slam on the Ritz Brothers”
MW: “Yes, I love helping animals, but mostly, you know, helping little old lady animals across the street, or helping bright young animals with their homework. I still have all of my Animal Scout badges. It’s just all this medical stuff that’s icky!”
M. WORTH – Don’t change, Steven! You may be an entitled little snot who’s been under my feet for years, but I need someone for Facebook reviewers to blame for my shotty pet care an accidental euthanizations.
RMMD: “What? ‘Triumph of the Will?’ Well, that took an unexpected turn!”
MW- hey, Ed’s already on Mary’s bad side for replacing Wilbur. If she finds out that he’s counseling people in life choices as well, Ed might not be the only one practicing euthanasia
Read about the great effort of some miscreants to create a snow dick:
Snow Art Gets a Big Rise
Respect.
RMMD: Based on what he watches, Hank Sr. is from Gasoline Alley and shook Abraham Lincoln’s hand.
@KMD: If they get home and find that Horrible Hank is watching Emmanuelle or something like that, then “Shaking Abraham Lincoln’s Hand” is a euphemism.
RMMD: They’re going to love Hank Sr’s vintage choice du jour: “Debbie Does Dallas.”
9CL: When seen in motion, Amos’s head shape makes more sense. He’s built to fly like a goose.
MW: Veterinary medicine isn’t just petting puppies for pay? No wonder the poor guy is disillusioned.
GT: Hey, NOBODY takes Cleveland! (I lie, everybody does)
RMMD: It’s very forward-thinking of Terry Beatty not to date his strip by specifying what kind of “player” the Harwood family uses to watch films. This will help smoothe things over for future Rex Morgan-reading generations who only understand entertainment through focused brainwaves and interpreting the signs of sewer mutant entrails.
MW: Well, it was fun pretending Dr. Mr. Ed had a personality for a moment. Now back to the usual pointless whining and empty platitudes.
Luann: Look at that disinterested irritation on Bernice’s face as she absorbs Piro’s gratitude for saving his life. Maybe Greg Evans should have been the one to replace Wilson and Nolan in Rex Morgan.
9CL: Are Edda and Amos lying flat on their backs in fear? Are they circumnavigating the building exterior via the window ledges? Have they been shrunk down and placed in a laboratory centrifuge? With art this lazy, your imagination is the only limit to what’s happening!
MW: Yes, Steven – for most of us, our childhoods were a different time. Literally.
Now Funky Winkerbean is gone, Rex Morgan has seen an opening to become the new strip that bores on endlessly about golden-era Hollywood.
“Don’t change, Steven! Keep wearing that lavender suit and teal shirt! It makes me look less bad in comparison!”
@Maltmash3r:
Doesn’t Dr Corey practice on youth in Asia?
Wow, real jobs are harder than your childhood perceptions of them. Who’a thunk it? Good thing you didn’t want to be a cop.
I’m glad I didn’t grow up to be a cowboy.
RMMD: New bride lady is probably just as surprised as everyone else that The Ritz Brothers or Wheeler and Woosley make Hank Jr. so horny he wants to turn in early but at this point she’s down for whatever works.
MW: “It’s like the nightmare of four years of veterinary school never ended.”
Luann – Greg Evans apparently doesn’t think “you’re my savior- let’s get coffee” is a red flag. More frighteningly, this may be the gateway to him thinking he has something useful to say about something important and we’re about to slide into “very special” territory.
CS: Ed closes out the week with an impressive 95/5 moron/asshole ratio.
“The All Gone Quinn round table, Ed. Anthony Quinn used to eat with us, don’t you remember? And now he’s dead.”
“Oh. That’s funny, I always thought this table was rectacular.”
FC: Dolly finds her hungover father lying on the floor Saturday morning.
“What are you doing there, Daddy?”
“Uh, pushups.”
SIX DIFFERENCES: “Which scene is slightly different from the other two?” The one in the middle, because it has a scene on either side of it, and the other two do not. D’oh.
GIL THORP: “You’ve come dangerously close to expressing signs of individuality, kid. People in the high school sports world won’t stand for much of that. Fall in line and wear the same sneakers as everybody else. Oh, and change your name to something else. ‘Leo’ sounds sort of girlish. We’ll accept ‘Larry.”
SPIDER-MAN: “Now we’d better get back to COLLEEN. The last she saw of us, we were clinging to a HELICOPTER, , , I’m sure she’d like us to TIE UP that DANGLING plot thread!”
WALLACE THE BRAVE: As I said before, Sterling has all of the bad qualities of cats and none of the good ones.
9CL – Amos looks to be somewhere around 80 years old today. I’d blame the author’s decline in motor skills, except he has put in the effort to make Edda look like a competently drawn comic character. Maybe he spent all his time on the elaborate backgrounds, which really set the tone for today’s exciting chase scene!
JP: “Okay, that didn’t work. Anybody got a plan B?”
GT: One week later, Milford forfeits all its games for illegally taking benefits not available to the general school population.
RMMD: “Early to bed works for me, knowwhatImean, knowwhatImean, nudge nudge, wink wink.”
GT – I had to read panel two a couple of times to figure out that the coach lady was talking to the team rather than to Gil. I never thought that the lack of an Oxford comma would be the thing I’d be complaining about in Gil Thorp, so kudos to Barajas for mixing it up, I guess.
MW: As he counsels Steven with less-than-satisfactory results, Dr. Ed suddenly lifts his nose and sniffs. “What is that? I think I smell muffins—just a whiff, mind you!—a spicy aroma wafting on the breeze, tendrils of odiferousness reaching like long, bony fingers from the direction of Charterstone. The wind is from the East. Yes. Only—now that it’s stronger, I realize it’s not muffins at all! No, not muffins, but fresh-baked…ANIMAL TREATS…! Look! That old hag who just stepped out of the taxi is coming this way! Only she’s not carrying an animal. The hag is holding a bag, not a dog who can wag, or a cat with a tag. The smell makes me gag!”
Blondie:
“Got any barbecue flavored cookies?”
“No, that would be stupid.”
“What about leg of lamb?”
“Get the fuck out of here.”
“If I buy all your cookies, can I put them on a sandwich and eat them like that?”
“I’m calling the cops.”
RMMD – Where’s Batman….
MW – Even a vet that is pure of heart and says his prayers be night….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
Wow. Josh’s tweet about cats on hardwood floors is featured in Huffington Post’s “22 of the Funniest Tweets about Cats and Dogs.”
@Merry Mirth:
> I’m glad I didn’t grow up to be a cowboy.
And I’ll bet your mama had a hand in that.
MW – “Don’t change, Steven! I see that it’s a full moon out there tonight, but don’t change!”
“I can’t help it, Uncle Ed! Look, the hair is already sprouting on the backs of my hands. And I feel the urge to… OWOOOO!”
Werewolf Veterinarian. Thursday nights on the CW.
@Weaselboy: Thank you for pointing that out. I also thought she was speaking to Coach Gil, and I didn’t bend my mind enough to see the different meaning with the serial comma.
I’m sure we’ve all seen this on the need for that comma: The Times [a British daily] once published an unintentionally humorous description of a Peter Ustinov documentary, noting that “highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector.”
I shared that with our communicators group at work (half of whom probably don’t even know what a serial/Oxford comma is), and I got a complaint from two people about the unsavoriness of it. Geezo, Beezo, you want to get a chuckle while learning something or do you want to get uptight?
Don Abundio, translated:
“The boss taught his dog to fetch the newspaper”
“So cute! Don’t you agree?”
“Yes…”
“But he’s mauled a dozen paperboys already”
MW-“Murdering animals just don’t seem like fun anymore.”
RMMD-“If we are going to bed early then let me take one of my pills now. You know what they say early to bed early to rise.”
Blondie-Just humor him. The man eats through his pain.
JP-I didn’t know that you could hear the gunshots from the firing range in ‘Beetle Bailey’ in ‘Judge Parker’.
FC-“I’m waiting to see him have a heart attack.”
A Facebook post asks for five people you’ve shaken hands with, with one of them being a lie. I hate those trolling posts, so I didn’t respond. But I will bore my Mudge friends with it, so here goes:
Ted Williams, Ted Kennedy, O. J. Simpson, The Crusher, Abraham Lincoln.
“Early to bed works for me! You’re sure you still have the blue pill?”
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: I didn’t know you were that old!
(I assume you are lying about shaking hands with supervillain Crusher Creel.)
Ukranazi StepanMarch 11th, 2023 at 6:00 am Reply
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: I didn’t know you were that old!
(I assume you are lying about shaking hands with supervillain Crusher Creel.)
***
Not that Crusher, nor Jerry “Crusher” Blackwell, nor Wesley Crusher. There is only one The Crusher!
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX:
Bob Cousy, Indians pitcher Charles Nagy, Dennis Kucinich . . . um, that’s it. Sheesh, I gotta get out more.
@Merry Mirth: #14
“I’m glad I didn’t grow up to be a cowboy.”
Or, like Snoopy, a cow:
https://www.gocomics.com/peanuts/2023/03/11
JP: Just as
predictedasspulled, the Spencer home was surrounded by meth snipers who promptly gunned down Judge Duncan and Detective Yelich as they exited the house. Or so we have to assume, because as usual this climactic moment is taking place entirely off-page while we instead watch Abbey and Sam make reaction faces at loud noises.No idea why Yelich wanted to do this, considering he believed this was a very likely consequence. Guess he just felt that guilty about maybe blabbing that Sam was looking into the Duncan case unofficially, because we all know how criminals are compelled to slaughter everyone who might one day take note of their activities, and nothing puts an end to law enforcement investigations and public concern faster than a growing pile of corpses.
And of course Sam Driver, the best and only trustworthy investigator in the world, had zero questions to ask Judge Duncan at any point. I mean, Lil Dunk and everyone else already told him what happened, so job done! Good investigators accept all assertions at face value without fuss, right? And I guess we’re never going to learn what the judge was hoping to accompish by coming here unarmed.
Oh, and now that we know for certain that Abbey’s house is surrounded by gunmen who are prepared to kill anyone they consider to be a threat (which is the entire human race as far as I can tell), surely the Spencer-Drivers are in extreme danger now? Pfft. Nah. Not even a little. The only question is whether we’ll even be told what deus ex machina is employed to resolve this farce.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: You must be talking about this guy.
MW – It feels like this boring conversation has been going on all wee…oh, yeah. It *has* been going on all week. Could we please get back to the “Wilbur is a deranged and dangerous stalker who’s one bottle of purple booze away from Kelrast Curve?” Pretty please?
Rex Morgan, M.D.: If only this strip had a medical-type character who knew the diagnostic code for a comic strip with its head up its ass. Say, oh, I don’t know, a doctor or a nurse? Perhaps a precocious ten year old? I’m just spitballing here.
FC: Today’s Family Circus is from March of 1978, 45 years ago. Jeff changed it by adding long pants and shoes to his dad. And erasing his mom.
MW – Looks like illustrating Moy’s drivel has finally worn down poor June Brigman. When she started we were all excited to see the redesigns, the much better art, the far more detailed salmon squares! But now, more and more strips are of the carelessly tossed off head and shoulders only laziness of late period A3G. For only pennies a day, you can help the artist victims of poorly written serial strips. Mike Manley is still valiantly trying, but I can’t imagine he won’t break very soon.
Rexmd -Im scared beatty might copy moy and show hank jr and yvonne in bed all week ! Zack and Iris was tough enough but the two old timers could force the need for vomit bags . Plus i didnt like that gleam in hank jrs eye .
RMMD: Usually if I were following a story and saw the narrative lingering on a scene as mind-numbingly boring as this, in which an old couple finishes dinner at a restaurant and contemplates watching some absolutely ancient movies or possibly going to bed early, I would assume their boring routine is about to be DRAMATICALLY INTERRUPTED by some unexpected excitement. Maybe instead of finding Hank Sr. watching old movies, they’ll find him dead! No, wait, that’s not so dramatic or unexpected since he’s super old. Maybe instead of peacefully returning home, they’ll get mugged, or carjacked, or taken hostage by a vigilante janitor! But given this strip’s record, there’s a 50/50 chance that their evening will be dramatically interrupted by someone who’s feeling dizzy due to low blood sugar, and a 50/50 chance that they’ll return home without incident and go to bed early. ANOTHER NAIL-BITING EPISODE OF REX MORGAN, M.D.!
Seriously, I hope they’re setting up a story in which these two come home to find Hank Sr. collapsed with a heart attack or something, and they have to call in Rex to save him. It would at least give us a little taste of drama.
MW: This guy has his DVM, right? Or at least is well on his way to earning one? If he hasn’t figured out that there’s more to animal care than using your toy stethoscope on your stuffed Pluto doll, he has nobody to blame but himself.
RMMD: And the less said about Hank Sr.’s love for Birth of a Nation, the better.
Rex Morgan: This strip continues to fight hard to be anything other than fun. “Oh, you want to read medical drama in our medical drama strip? To read something interesting or at least fun to mock? Fuck you. We’re spending all year on these middle aged losers getting laid with other middle aged losers by babbling in circles about nothing.”
Mary Worth: God, I love that melodramatically lit first panel, it’s like something out of an old-school noir movie and completely inappropriate for a strip that’s really just about a veterinarian and his dipshit nephew whining about work.
RMMD: If it’s cold enough for gloves and carefully-tied scarves, where are their hats? Poor Hank Jr. must be losing 99% of his body heat through his scalp. For Yvonne’s sake, let’s hope he’s wearing flannel
boxerstighty-woolies.I get that the Ritz Brothers aren’t everyone’s cup of java, but lay off of Wheeler and Woolsey! It’s taken decades to get their movies out of the vaults and back on TCM, so don’t go pulling any of that “Okay, boomer” jive and making them disappear again! You’re “Rex Morgan, MD;” don’t start acting too hip for the room.
MW: Anyone else thinking Whiny Steve is going to spend his burnout vacation dating Estelle? It’s pretty much the only way to tie this crap together: Estelle dates Whiny Steve behind Dr. Mr. Ed’s back, Wilbur catches them during his daily stalking and threatens to report them to veterinary management, Estelle fusses over it for weeks, Mary solves the problem by forcing Estelle to appease Wilbur in some fashion. Most importantly, Estelle and Dr. Mr. Ed are just too close in age to be dating in Mary Worth.
BCN: “Do you have any matches?” is a good all-purpose punchline. You could insert it into 90% of Family Circus installments and vastly improve the product.
Dustin: Honestly the kettleball in general is too advanced for Dustin. With those noodle arms he should start on those little 1.5lb hand weights they use in aerobics classes.
GT: So they went out and blew the entire fundraising take on high-end athletic shoes.
JP: “And there we go, everybody who actually cares about this plot is dead. We should be left alone now.”
MW: Veterinarian PTSD! Steve’s spent the afternoon euthanizing elderly pet turtles, and now he’s suffering from shell shock.
JP: That takes care of Detective Drunk and Judge Meth, at long last. I believe we’ve earned a month of Neddy lounging around in a corset and step-ins.
RMMD: Wheeler and Woolsey? Everyone watches Wheeler and Woolsey. Call me when TCM does a Thelma Todd/Zasu Pitts marathon.
Andy Capp: Please do not speculate on the reasons a man would remove his false teeth in the bar toilet.
MW: All this heavy shading and window-gazing sure indicates a heavier subject matter than “I actually have to do work at my job?”
RMMD-How do you feel about the works of Lewis and Clark?
LUANN: Greg Evans: “Hmmm. Should I have looked up what the term “red flag” means before using it haphazardly in my strip? Naw!”
Gasoline Alley-“You’re old, Walt, but you’re not that old.”
@jroggs: re MW: No, whiny Steve is perfect for whiny Dawn! But first they have to meet cute. Maybe Steven sitting on a bench along the walking path, sobbing uncontrollably. Dawn walks by and notices a pond fish has jumped out of the water!
She yells for help and Steven leaps into action and saves the fish! When he tells her that’s part of his life’s work as a Doctor of Veterinary Medicine, she realizes he’s of a higher status than even a physician’s assistant! Get ready for “Stawn”!!
Crank: It’s funny because … Ed doesn’t know what the Algonquin Round Table is? Seriously, it looks like that’s the joke?
GT: Leo! So that’s the name of the dude who looks like Toby but isn’t Toby! I feel like I should write this down for future reference, but I also feel like that would be admitting I care who he is, and I’m not prepared to do that.
“Ya’ll should look like a team”? “Ya will should”??? Or did Bajaras mean “Y’all”? Maybe he should have stuck to the stiff “you all” Gil used in the previous panel (although followed by an uncharacteristic dropped “g”).
HtH: It occurred to me recently that one of the weirder conventions of the humour strips is the solitary hermit who people routinely go to for advice. This guy, the Sage in Crock, the Guru in BC, the Wise Old Ass in Pearls Before Swine, the Tree That Knows Stuff in Over the Hedge… At least this guy’s advice is more practical than the usual mildly sarcastic riffs on sub-Worthian platitudes.
(In real life, hermits who live in inaccessable places contemplating the universe are very rare, hard to visit casually due to the aformentioned inaccessability, and would probably just tell you to go away and leave them alone if you did — they didn’t set up shop in a cave up a mountain to become a drop-in centre for confused comic strip characters.)
Zits: I feel like this would work better if “not working weekends” wasn’t based, historically, on actual religious beliefs.
S4: I know it’s silly to try to make sense of anything Ted says, but can’t he just buy more pop-tarts?
Pluggers – You can dress a bear in a suit and tie, but he’s still a bear.
So Sally’s mother is able to help herself to a winter’s worth of Pop Tarts but can’t make a drink for herself?
Admit it: you thought Hägar’s mother-in-law was pure evil! This is some new-level vexing.
DOLLY: But it only took Daddy 3 grunts to make PJ.
@Everything Is Better With Monkeys: Manley gave up on JP years ago. You can see it when you compare current JP to the current Phantom of his pre 2017 JP.
@jroggs: No idea why Yelich wanted to do this, considering he believed this was a very likely consequence. Guess he just felt that guilty about maybe blabbing that Sam was looking into the Duncan case unofficially, because we all know how criminals are compelled to slaughter everyone who might one day take note of their activities, and nothing puts an end to law enforcement investigations and public concern faster than a growing pile of corpses.
Whenever I imagine the crooked cops/drug gang/drug gang working with crooked cops/whoever Ces has decided it is this week making their plans, I wish someone was there to tell them it’s “vun of dose plans“. They deserve to all lose their hats.
JP: I’d like to think that Yelich shot the judge, the formerly mute son, then himself. That would tie up all of the loose plot threads.
JP: After a weekend of *suspense,* we find out on Monday that the “BLAM BLAM BLAM” sounds was just Yelich slamming his car doors real hard before safely driving away.
I was at a round table at the Algonquin several years ago. I still remember the laughter when I fell backward in my chair. It hurt physically and mentally.
And financially. The price they charge for martinis is outrageous. $16! All over the floor…
To be considered vintage something only has to be at least 20 years old, so Hank Jr. could be looking forward to, fingers crossed, an evening of Nicolas Cage in Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance.
***
I’ll give Dr. Nephew this, nobody is prepared for a job dealing with the public and how soul crushing those are.
Luann: I’m not interested in Piro, either. Don’t I count?
@Horace Broon: Crankshaft only learned to read about ten years ago, and it was so he could decipher a baseball roster, not to settle in front of a cozy fire with a volume of Heywood Broun essays or Dorothy Parker short stories.
I’m just going about my business when it occurred to me I only looked around 2012ish, not 2002ish. Damn it, because Kung Pow: Enter the Fist would have been a much better layer of hell for Hank Jr.
@Horace Broon: @Ukulele Ike: Crankshaft has never heard of it, and I suspect Tommy only learned about it recently. Otherwise why would he have waited so long to have his erudite characters make the reference?
A&J: Cute take on the annoyance that is the spring forward/fall back time changes.
.
Luann: Borenice is dumb. That is all.
.
JP: Ever see the movie “El Dorado”? Sam apparently has. Bye Pedro, err, Detective Yelich.
@Ukulele Ike: Sure, it absolutely makes sense that he’s never heard of them, I just don’t see how it’s a joke. If anything, I’d say the fact it makes so much sense works against it being a joke.
RwO: Well, it’s been a slow week for our clients, so we were happy to get this Raccoon pair placed in Rhymes with Orange. Their thing with the garbage never gets old, does it? You remember we have an entire ensemble of Raccoons available for banquet scenes. But the RwO team thought a more intimate “dinner for two” setup would work here, and also help keep them under budget for the week.
Have you noticed that the featured guest Animals are the first thing comics cut back when they try to pinch pennies? In the Biz we call it a leading economic indicator. Of course it’s really a case of false economy – they don’t realize until it’s too late that the Animals were boosting the bottom line. Case in point – Mark Trail. They hardly use any of our clients except for some scattered Foreground Fauna, and “occasionally” the Sunday spread. I think all those “bros” they use must work cheap…. but ya get what ya pay for.
MW – Dawn’s already, um, *had* two medical doctors, Dr. Drew and Dr. Ned. Plus a PA, even if Moy apparently has no idea what a PA actually is/does.
Adding a vet to the collection kind of makes sense. Next, she can date a psychiatrist. “All the doctors are belong to me!”
Elizabeth from The Foobs was The Golden Vagina, but in an all-purpose manner, from college dorm-mates to Mounties to helicopter pilots to…well, Blandthony. Dawn is becoming more of a specialized Golden Vagina for the medical community at large. The Golden Medi-Vag.
@Horace Broon: True. Good point.
I guess I’m just used to Crankshaft almost never including a recognizable joke.
@jroggs: [Dawn Weston has entered the chat]
Philosophical question: Which is the worse comic strip grandmother: Laura Jansen (Hil’s grandmother) or Florence Keane (White Mushroom Cloud-Haired Holier Than Thou grandmother)? Discuss.
@InnocentBystander: What really would tie up all the loose ends is if they shot Ces.
Pluggers: This can fit both the pluggers are poor and the pluggers are cheap trope, also the pluggers don’t care about your la-dee-da elitist fashion fads because we’re salt of the earth people trope.
MW: “That’s it, I’m going back to my other dream of being a fireman. You get to tool around in those cool red trucks, and I’d still be able to hang out with Dalmatians!”
RMMD: I’m something of a vintage movie buff and even I’m not familiar with Wheeler & Woolsey. Although apparently leaving one of their movies in the DVD player increases the chances that your retirement-age son and daughter in law will have sex tonight.
@Ukulele Ike: Joke by Wheeler and Woolsey:
Cute chick: Sing me a song!
Wheeler (or Woolsey, I forget): How about One Hour With You?
Cute chick: Sure! But first, a song!
FC: You’re cheating, Daddy! Those are girl push-ups!
RMMD: The Ritz Brothers are a love ’em or hate ’em deal. The Medved Brothers didn’t think too highly of them but Johnny Carson was a big fan. On one episode of the Tonight Show he lamented that their movies never come up on TV and he was afraid a comedy team from Hollywood’s golden era would be lost to future generations.
A Ritz Brothers movie does play a big part in a Leave it to Beaver episode. The Beaver was assigned to do a book report on the Three Musketeers. Instead of reading the novel he decided to cheat and watch a movie version on TV. The problem was he picked the 1939 Ritz Brothers version which was a total farce. He ended up getting a failing grade.
C-Shaft: Every rule has its exception, Ralph.
HtH: If Robert Crumb’s Mr. Natural has the key to the king’s treasure and is giving it away to Hagar there has to be a trick. Probably just wants some naughty alone time with Helga.
H&J: If Freud never said “Behind every mother-in-law joke lies a mother-in-law fantasy” then maybe he should have.
JP: “Right, exactly. Until that.”
Phantom: The Unknown Hipster Commander has lost all interest in the prophecy now that it’s gone so mainstream.
Kim Newman’s most recent novel, NOTHING MORE THAN NIGHT, is a fantasy/noir thing set in 1930s Hollywood; the characters include The Sparx Brothers, whose career depends on getting advance word of upcoming Marx Brothers movies and ripping off the plots cheaply to beat them into theaters. Also, they have a sideline, as TVTropes notes:
“The Sparx Brothers, a trio of unfunny clowns who make knock-off comedy films for Monolith Pictures, are revealed to double as sadistic enforcers and hitmen for the studio boss.”
I got the impression when reading the book (which I recommend) that Newman, very knowledgable in film history, was riffing on the Ritz Brothers (though as far as I know they never doubled as enforcers….)
Love Is-She should get a body pillow made of him.
@Peanut Gallery:
I didn’t know Dolly Parton used to be a maid.
@Baja Gaijin: Philosophical question: Which is the worse comic strip grandmother: Laura Jansen (Hil’s grandmother) or Florence Keane (White Mushroom Cloud-Haired Holier Than Thou grandmother)? Discuss.
***
I’m impressed you know the first names. I’ll go with HTT Grandma, in part because Sally Forth is pushing their grandma as a bitch on wheels while the Keaneii apparently intend for HTT Grandma to be a kindly lovable person like Mary Worth. This is sort of the Cunther effect. If he were portrayed in a manner that we were supposed to hate him, we wouldn’t. Or at least we wouldn’t hate her as much.
That said, my vote for the worst is Fred Flintstone’s mother-in-law. (Baja, can you dig up her name?)
On another note, I envision Dr. Mr. Ed finally striking the right chord with, “But Steven, don’t you remember how much fun you had cornholing that dead goat?”
“Ah, yes, Uncle Ed. Of course I’ll stay.”
@Artist formerly known as Ben: I read about Wheeler and Woolsey about a million years ago in a film history book about the “great” comedy teams. Can’t say I’ve ever seen one of their shorts, though. I assume there may be a few on YouTube?
Ditto Thelma Todd/Zasu Pitts. Thelma was great in the two Marx Bros flicks she was in, and like most cinema nerds I am enamored of Pitt’s work in von Stroheim’s McTeague (released, chopped to ribbons, as Greed). But never watched them together. Patsy Kelly neither, although I re-watched Rosemary’s Baby a couple weeks ago…
Patsy Kelly was a good buddy of Tallulah Bankhead, and worked as her secretary for a while. Talk about corned beef and roses.
Slylick Fox and Comix For Kinx: In 1 Cassandra is fleeing an angry Slylick, In 2 Cassandra is fleeing a horny Slylick, In 3 Cassandra is chasing a 2-for-1 sale on catnip at Safeway to ensure future slylicks.
Apparently, “Rex Morgan” is targeted at “film buffs aged 75 and over”, a small and rapidly diminishing demographic, I would say.
@Ukulele Ike:
I read about Wheeler and Woolsey about a million years ago in a film history book about the “great” comedy teams.
_____________________________________________
To learn more about Wheeler and Woolsey and other great vaudeville and burlesque comedy duos CBS suggests you consult your local Trav S.D. , he’ll help you … LEARN MORE ABOUT IT.
@Garrison Skunk: Just like in Blondie, there are only two female character designs in Don Abundio. In Abundio’s case, the two designs are “foxy babe” and Lady Veronica / Hilda the maid.
@Flipper:
FC: Today’s Family Circus is from March of 1978, 45 years ago. Jeff changed it by adding long pants and shoes to his dad. And erasing his mom.
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“It’s good to be the Cartoonist!”- almost Mel Brooks.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX:
That said, my vote for the worst is Fred Flintstone’s mother-in-law. (Baja, can you dig up her name?)
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I’m not Baja, but it’s Pearl Slaghoople.
@Sally…Sally Fif: Nope, I won’t admit it. Hagar’s MiL looks like she could tell you some great stories if you got her drunk enough. With Sally’s mother, the alcohol would only make the narcissism worse.
@Baja Gaijin: Laura Jansen, easy. HTTG goes home after her visits.
Six Chex and a Cat Named Gillette: “Technically all cartoonists are disposable depending on how you fire them.”
@Artist formerly known as Ben:
RMMD: I’m something of a vintage movie buff and even I’m not familiar with Wheeler & Woolsey. Although apparently leaving one of their movies in the DVD player increases the chances that your retirement-age son and daughter in law will have sex tonight.
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Not to be confused with Hays Code favorite Inhibit & Horney
The Familliar Mucus: “I don’t know, Dolly, it’s just not the same without hearing Mom’s “YES! YES! OH,DOG,YES!”
@Shrug:
Or, like Snoopy, a cow:
https://www.gocomics.com/peanuts/2023/03/11
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Always suspected Patty was two faced.
@Ukulele Ike: Same here as far as Thelma Todd and the Marx Brothers. I’ve heard of Pitts and know she played Hildegarde Withers in a couple of movies, but I haven’t gotten around to seeing them yet. (Edna May Oliver I’ve seen in the role.)
@91 Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: Pearl Slaghoople. She looks like Fred Flintstone with Wilma’s hair and Fred’s face. [shudder]
@99 Garrison Skunk: D’oh! Ninja’d!
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: Sally’s mother in law is actively unpleasant and seems to enjoy causing harm. She imposes herself in your house and eats all your pop tarts. Holier than thou grandma, on the other hand, is a constant source of low grade harm, with her smug sense of superiority and disapproval at how far below her standards the rest of the family always shows itself to be. She would eat away at your soul.
My only good handshake is Jack Dempsey. He was at Excelsior amusement park in 1960, by the shores of Lake Minnetonka.
@allangary: And it’s one of the best ones, too!
@Artist formerly known as Ben: Zasu singlehandedly killed the Hildegard Withers franchise. Audiences were used to seeing her playing dumb in comedic roles, and didn’t buy her as a savvy amateur sleuth who could beat the police force to the murderer.
She had a prominent role in Ruggles of Red Gap, appearing in the great scene where the British valet (Charles Laughton) proves a better American than the western yokels.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=awsmXerhLqQ
@Peanut Gallery: Bwahaha!
Come to think of it, the CW has done worse.
I’ve tried, Lord knows, to find redeeming virtues in the Ritz Bros, and W&W, but they are just bad, terrible, rotten, horrible, and feculent.
MW: As has been pointed out on CC, it takes a lot of hard work and time to get through vet school, also lotsa money, I assume. So I would think there would be reluctance to give up the profession for those reasons alone. But I just checked online because I was curious, and there are a number of reasonable career paths for vet school graduates who don’t want to work in traditional vet clinics.
So consider your future rationally, Steven, and do some online research, and don’t torture us for the next three weeks with moaning and whining. We get enough of that when Wilbur shows up.
@Liam:
RMMD-How do you feel about the works of Lewis and Clark?
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Or Morton & Hays?
@Baja Gaijin: “Pearl Slaghoople”. Wonder if that’s a reference to Maj. Hoople of “Our Boarding House” — prob. not, but did you know, Elizabeth Taylor played her once?
JP: Welp, sounds like you’re an orphan, kid. I suggest you continue being able to talk if possible.
GA: If that doesn’t completely cover the topic of daylight savings time, I just really don’t know what would.
BCN: If anyone is wondering about the realism of mice living in a house with so many cats, don’t get me started, but yes. It’s a lot more realistic than the cute little clothes.
@115 N(scud): Yes, in the second live-action movie.