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Mary Worth, 2/20/24

OK, I’ll officially be back on this storyline’s side again if instead of manfully failing to mention those inconvenient paternity test results and stepping up as a fake dad, Keith instead spirals into a world of paranoia where he questions everything he thought he knew. Kitty did keep Sonia a secret from him all these years, though if she wasn’t really his daughter I guess it was less “keeping her a secret” so much as “not telling him about a person who wasn’t related to him and isn’t any of his business.” Also, she didn’t tell him, a guy she slept with a few times 20 years ago, about a fake vegan with a dumb hat who kept hanging around and who seemed interested in a sexual/predatory way in Kelly or maybe in Sonia, who can say, but the important thing is that she kept Keith in the dark about him! Again, some might call this less “keeping Keith in the dark” and more “not keeping a guy she slept with a few times 20 years ago up to date about her current personal drama, because she hasn’t talked to him in 20 years so why would she tell him about this specifically,” but the important thing is that Keith is becoming increasingly emotionally unmoored, which, I cannot emphasize enough, I support.

Gasoline Alley, 2/20/24

OK, fine, it turns out the shocking and disturbing news in Gasoline Alley isn’t about nightmarish genetic experiments but rather the fact that they’re going to rename Gasoline Alley, presumably because of woke. I guess “Gasoline Alley” is the name of a specific geographical location within the strip, but if it is they haven’t made an overt reference to it in years, and I think it would be very funny if the city council within the strip had the awesome power to change the name of the very universe that contained their entire reality.