Never has the word “unique” been so obviously used as an insult
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Mary Worth, 7/3/24
Do you, Jeff? Do you know what’s like to go through a rough patch? Because I’ve been reading this strip for a while, and as near as I can tell the Dr. Jeff Corey Emotional Spectrum mostly ranges from “wry amusement” to “mild annoyance.” Whenever truly powerful emotions make an appearance — an urge to be of service, say, or rising panic as your sinuses begin to clog — you simply flee the area (to Vietnam and away from Mary’s cat-dander-filled apartment, respectively). And this is, frankly, how Mary likes it! Wilbur may be OK as a “quirky good friend,” but when it comes to sort-of-boyfriends, our gal demands an even keel and does not want to have her Bum Boat dinners interrupted by a lot of “feelings.”
Pluggers, 7/3/24
Now, probably you’re expecting me to try to figure out whether the point of this joke is “pluggers don’t take Viagra because, despite their age, their erections are still firm and vigorous” or “pluggers don’t take Viagra because nobody wants to have sex with them.” But, nope! That’s not an angle I care to explore. Sorry to disappoint! No, I have a different complaint. I take levothyroxine daily, as it happens; I’m not even sad that this gives me something in common with pluggers, because not long after I was diagnosed with a hypoactive thyroid, we found out that Mary Worth’s Iris had a similar ailment, so frankly nothing can hurt me in that regard. But why is this plugger’s levothyroxine blue? Mine is just boring white. Do I not deserve a little splash of color in my morning? Should a plugger live a more aesthetic life than I do?
Gasoline Alley, 7/3/24
I really appreciate the visual storytelling here. As this tree guy says “$7,000,” he’s pointing to the part of his estimate where “$7,000” has been helpfully printed in a large, bold font, which tells us that not only is Walt’s hearing aid acting up, but he needs a new glasses prescription as well.
Family Circus, 7/3/24
Over the years of doing this blog, the strip I’ve gained the most respect for is the Family Circus. The stereotype is that it’s all panels of kids saying the darnedest things that old people lovingly cut out of the paper and hang on their refrigerators; but two or three days a week on average, the joke is actually that little kids are very annoying. Maybe old people cut these out too, but then casually cover them up with mediocre report cards or whatever when the grandkids come over.
254 replies to “Never has the word “unique” been so obviously used as an insult”
Mary Worth Mashups: At least they’ve begun the Mary Worth Laps of Unearned
Ass-KissingPraise.MW: I see that Mary decided to ditch her “good friend” because apparently taking Wilbur out to eat is such an inconvenience for her…unlike, say, a wake and a burial at sea for a goldfish. After all, everyone should be ready to drop everything to cater to a middle aged man with the emotional maturity of a four year old. But going out to eat in this economy? What a hassle!
@Baja Gaijin: All of these are in character for our middle aged manchild but the first one has such a unique panel that I’m picking that.
Mary Worth: What the heck is Mary holding? Is there a glass that looks like that, or is she holding the neck of an enormous bottle of liquor?
Family Circus: Just off panel, Jeffy’s wearing a shit-eating grin. He’s been giving Jeffy wedgies every time Thel’s back is turned.
Gasoline Alley: Walt eyes and ears are working fine; his brain, on the other hand, caught “Plugger Syndrome.”
My wife takes Levothyroxine, but hers is yellow. Maybe they come in a whole rainbow, according to your social status (blue being at the bottom).
RMMD:
Aunt Judy looks like a cross between Lucille Ball and Eraserhead’s Henry Spencer.
Also I’m loving the flashbacks to the best character revealing Jeff’s allergy to
pussycats and Mary being an insufferable bitch because how dare Jeff go off to take care of sick children instead of being her ATM.MW:
“Mary, I’m forever grateful to you for always helping me through my rough patches. You summon in me the words of the inimitable Clarence Carter, albeit slightly adapted.”
“And what might those words be, Jeff?”
“Patches — I’m dependin’ on you, hon!”
RMMD:
“How’s Parker?”
“Alan Parker? Well, you know, off and on with Katherine, but basically an addled, impetuous buffoon stripped of his stentorian, unflinching presence when the new writer came on in 2016. Randy? — another emasculated shell of his former self. Oh, wait — you’re talking about a different Parker, aren’t you.”
FC: My sympathies lie with the Dad in the background who clearly doesn’t want to be there and who’s about to get an earful from his wife as he hands his kid a stick of cotton-candy by the spun sugar end.
Is “rough patch” Jeff’s code for his unrequited horniness and his subsequent trips to Vietnam?
MW: I’d like to think that Wilbur is at the table, just out of frame, still quietly sobbing as these two pat each other on the back.
Also, I’ve said it before, but how wide do you figure that table is for them to be sitting so close? Eight inches? Six?
Plugger: On first read I didn’t scan viagra at all, and thought this was a Matrix reference? Like ‘Pluggers know that the reality created for them by their favorite cable news hosts isn’t real, but it’s just so dang comfortable..!’
GA: Oops, looks like a certain comic strip writer had some yard work done recently. I look forward to next week’s strip on what crooks plumbers are, or how back in the day coffee refills were free!
FC: I honestly can’t tell which of these two is saying the dialogue? Maybe they’re both yelling it at each other, like an improv exercise gone terribly wrong.
“I know about rough patches from losing the love of my life when we graduated from college and we both ended up marrying women and we both had kids…and then after my wife died, some nosy hag inserted herself into my business and I ended up here.”
RMMD: The Bully gets his comeuppance when Flo from Mel’s Diner tells him to “Kiss my grits!“
“If I can help him through this rough patch it is the least I can do, and I am all about doing the least in any situation—that’s just who I am.”
RMMD:
“How’s Parker?”
“Awake, but a little disoriented.”
“Ahh. Like our readership.”
MW – Mary’s got the proper grip to give a good hand job. She’s ready to go from a salt shaker to the real thing.
Luann: The writing is still as stupid as ever, but the over-the-top artwork did give me a chuckle…
RMMD: And there it is… Having finally reconnected this storyline with the strip’s namesake, now I want to ask if anyone has noticed a change in Buck Sr. Look at panel 2. Has Beatty removed at least one of his chins?
JP: ‘They’ll be fine. We’re so obscenely wealthy we hired that David Hasselhoff guy to be lifeguard. He actually knows all that stuff from ‘Baywatch’, right?
SF: Hilary’s future self is thinking ‘I could be having farewell sex with Nona and Faye right now, but nooooo…’
MW: And so the tale closes as Wilbur is jettisoned overboard and everyone else goes to the Bum Boat. It’s sad to think that we’ll never see Stellan again. Well, unless Mary or Jeff order the “Fresh Catch Special.”
Blondie: It’s the continuing adventures of Blondie’s newest star character – [Name To Be Determined by Online Poll], aka Kevin! Today we learn about Kevin’s qualifications to be a professional pastry chef. Turns out she has none! No education, no work history, no trackable training, nothing! And that’s great news to Blondie, who is disregarding her own years of experience and knowledge and instead deferring to her idiot daughter who thinks Youtube is neat and stuff! Go get ‘em, Kevin!
Luann: …On second thought, maybe Kevin’s social media baking education isn’t so bad after all. Jesus CHRIST.
JP: Oh no! Lucas forgot to warn Sophie and Reena about the beach! Except we don’t know what this supposed danger even is. And whatever it is, it’s apparently not a danger worth mentioning. So, uh… can we please hurry this up to the part where Lucas’s family are human traffickers or cannibals or whatever?
RMMD: Oh good, Rex is treating Parker. They should be in good hands th- wait a minute. Rex “the Eyeball Mangler” Morgan is the on-duty surgeon? In early July? Treating a patient who got blasted in the face and is now suffering vision problems? Welp. Looks like Parker’s crappy day is about to become even worse.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: And Jeff knows that Mary’s never going anywhere near his “no-no square” so I don’t know why he’s bothering to try.
@Pozzo:
Pluggers: My wife and I take very low dose levothyroxine and the pills are pink. Guess they’re made by Skittles? I’m not that far from Keedysville, maybe I’ll mosey over there and make sure Sheldon didn’t grab the wrong bottle.
FC – Odd amusement park. And odd drawing, too. Three roller coasters cheek by jowl. On the left, one roller coaster is visible through the spokes of the Ferris Wheel. But on the right, the coaster frames block the view of what’s behind them.
FC: Looks like the booth to the far right is “manned” by a topless woman. That’s probably not the kind of fun Jeffy had in mind.
FC: “Then why did we bring Dolly?”
H&L: So wait, is Trixie going to be lifted out of the yard in the talons of a golden eagle? This whole foreshadowing thing is confusing.
FC: “Sorry, Jeffy, you know we can only afford so many tickets. It’s your turn to wait in the car.”
FC: “…and you’re going to have a GOOD TIME whether you like it or not!”
Peanuts: My GoComics sub includes the “Peanuts Begins” strips, which arrive in a barely readable digital slop of JPEG compression because no-one at the syndicate wants to shell out the extra $50 for a bigger hard drive. I just wanted to say that in today’s strip, the “L” and “I” of “How’s that for a slick job?” were blurred together into a “U”. That’s upsetting enough, but it’s much, much worse when the next panel is “I bet I’d make a pretty good housewife!”
PLUGGERS: My theory is that Plugger’s wife is sneaking the blue pill in. When you’re a Plugger, going out and looking for a sidepiece is exhausting.
MW: Wow, sea air really IS good for you! Jeff looks like his own grandson.
RMMD: “I hope Parker is released soon. We have a couples hair appointment scheduled.”
Mary Worth: Nothing on the outside, nothing on the inside, nothing in the glass but tap water, room-temperature.
Levothyroxine Update: My research reveals there are actually 12 colors ranging from peach to green indicating different strengths from low to high—25 to 300 mg. (I misidentified my color as pink not peach.) Guess that makes me in some respects a Plugger??
MW: Mary’s death-grip on her miniature wine-sampling glass tightens as Dr. Jeff takes credit, “If I can help him deal with grief in his own unique way, it’s the LEAST I can do!”
MW: By “rough patches,” Jeff means the times his boat runs over marine mammals.
Pluggers: I figured Wilfred Brimley Plugger would be taking something for his diabeetus.
GA: Walt doesn’t realize he’s having an anxiety attack and is ignoring the tunnel vision he’s experiencing.
FC: One of the ride wranglers must have told Jeffy about the “You must not be a melonhead to ride this ride” rule.
MW – Wrong answer, Jeff. Mary was fishing for compliments. You were supposed to lavish praise on *her* for all *she* did (which mainly consisted of banging on a table and doing a tiny bit of cleaning Wilbur’s apartment.)
We cannot get out of this hellish story until you lavish praise on Mary! So lavish away, doctor boy! Get lavishing, pronto!
Frazz: It’s OK, Mrs. Olsen. Apathy is underrated.
Luann: After the twins arrive, Toni is going to have to care for seven children. Yeek!
CS: More like a FUG, like “what the FUG is this shit?”
Pluggers: Big miss for me, today. No Plugger on earth is prescribed daily Viagra nor would they want to.
FC-Did you take them to a parking lot carnival?
MW-You are treating a grown man like a child. Did you take Wilbur out for ice cream afterwards?
@Baja Gaijin: I enjoyed all those mashups. The bear sniffing Wilbur’s sandwich put that one over the top for me.
MW-I would not call slipping into a deep depression after the loss of a goldfish a quirk.
MW: Mary politely waits for Jeff to finish blathering before biting into her balut.
If you stop scrolling before you get to the text under Family Circus, you just get a very pleasant image of Jeffy crying and you can imagine all the things Thel might be calmly saying to him. “You’re adopted.” “We’re going to drop you off at lost and found.” “Your dad and brothers are dead.” “Santa isn’t real.” “Paw Patrol isn’t real.” “You’re not real.”
Another Levo taker here (thyroid removed), but mine are purple. Just like my favorite character’s leotards.
In the five years I’ve taken Adderall, every refill seems to be a different color. Three different shades of orange, cyan, dark blue…
The pill itself has ADHD.
MW — the Dr. Jeff Corey Emotional Spectrum mostly ranges from “wry amusement” to “mild annoyance.”
Also known as the Rex Morgan Emotional Spectrum. And a “rough patch” for Rex means an office visits with Buck or having the kids leave the eggs out of the fridge. . .
@Needless Exposition: Well sure. A wake and burial at sea is an imposition on Jeff, and Mary doesn’t mind doing that to her drippy henpecked boyfriend. But the Bum Boat signifies the start of her much-unearned victory lap. That’s “me” time, and Mary will be damned if anyone is going to horn in on the singing of her praises.
@Pozzo: Wow, who knew drugs were like Skittles?!
GA: Wasn’t
Magical NegressGertie supposed to get estimates? And is this guy one of them?Curtis: Seeing it’s only Wednesday, I’m sure we’re going to get one more strip of Diane and Greg berating Curtis for crashing the other picnic, but there will be a final panel with the two of them befuddled but each carrying a stack of food from the other picnic.
@Little Guy, RxMD: Shut up, Beatty.
RxMD: “The Dr. Morgan? I read his diagnosis! I read all his diagnosis!”
MW – A rough patch? Meaning Dr. Jeff has suffered an extended psychotic episode as well, though perhaps not one involving a goldfish? Or is he just talking about a devastating lack of self esteem? That might explain why he’s dating a woman who appears to be at least 20, if not 30, years older than him, never mind the complete lack of sex.
CS – IFO! That’s the punchline! Identified Flying Grill! Unidentified Flying Grill is an oxymoron! Sheesh!
Tomorrow I’ll post about the family continuing to let this asshole anywhere near lighter fluid and charcoal. I’m too upset today.
@Baja Gaijin:
I like the artwork in #2 and the dialogue in #3. Call it a mash-up mash-up.
CS: I’m beginning to think Batiuk has a set number of “jokes” that he cycles through every year. “June/July? Time for the grill gag, everyone loves that. October? Time to break out the Pizza-box guy, which sets me up perfectly for Lillian’s next book…” It’s always the same not-funny gags over and over again.
FC: Originally drawn when Bil had to moonlight to supplement the family income.
“We’ll go on some rides as soon as your father is done in the dunk tank!“
MARY WORTH: Just so you guys know, “IT’S JUST A FUCKING FISH!” also makes a good review for The Bum Boat, so no need to let up on that.
@Dyna Moe: Mine is pretty consistently peach/orange, although the shape changes depending on how effed up the supply chain currently is. The joys of taking a controlled substance…
“This is supposed to be a FUN place,” Ma Keane intones to a child surrounded by devices that hurl him around at high speed and raise him to terrifying heights. A clown’s face, slowly morphed by societal norms from the guise of a happy prankster to the mask of a serial killer, looms over the scene. Cry your honest tears, child.
@2+2=7: Jeff’s only there because Mary doesn’t have to pay for her food if her
closeted ATMloving boyfriend is there.@cheech wizard: Mary is his psychotic episode. Jeff could be happily content with his new lease on life as a swinging San Francisco bachelor but then Mary came along and threatened to out him unless he basically became her sugar daddy.
FC: It all started when Billy pointed at the clown and whispered to Jeffy; “That’s your real dad.”
CS: This is a classic Funkyverse moment: characters bemoaning their cruel fate, rolling their eyes, and smirking helplessly at a problem they could solve in 30 seconds. You don’t have to go to Ed’s barbecue. You don’t have to let him live in your house. You don’t have to let him use the grill. It’s really that simple.
MW: I just realized something. Weren’t most of the attendees of this stupid fish wake the same people who participated in the intervention against Aldo Kelrast? I remember Ian and Toby were there. A bit hypocritical of them to indulge the needy Wilbur, especially after he straight-up announced his “fish” is nothing more than the embodiment of his failed attempts to pursue a woman who rejected him. Maybe they still have a guilty conscience about their perceived role in Aldo’s death, so they’re erring on the lenient side with Wilbur?
REX MORGAN M.D.: So all this time, Parker was actually being picked on for being raised by Little Orphan Annie.
Mary Worth – The fact that the decorative lifebuoy is painted the same color as the brown wall, negating an important function of visibility in its rescuing ability, is either a colorist error, or some deeply hidden symbolic critique about Mary Worth’s version of helping her friends.
Pluggers – Levothyroxine, being a generic, comes in a variety of colors based on manufacturer. A Plugger’s pill caddy is the closest thing you’ll ever find to a Pride flag in their homes and neighborhoods.
Gasoline Alley – When you are as old as Walt, emergency repairs on your house will end up costing more than you paid for the entire thing during the Depression.
Family Circus – Like early Dennis the Menace, The Family Circus was a lot harder back in the day. Even the Wikipedia page has a 1962 panel about Daddy drinking at the ballpark as the joke. Maybe it’s just as Bil Keane aged the strip turned from “my kids are annoying” to an indulgent grandparent that spoils their grandkids and then hands them back to their parents.
MT: The main character in a comic is typically considered a proxy for the author. With that in mind, I wish Jules wouldn’t include Rusty in her sick, Deliverance fantasies.
Dolly stares with cool curiosity. “These humans experience violent distress,” she thinks. “I can turn this to my advantage.” She’s packed more menace into this look than Dennis has accomplished in seventy-plus years.
Holding behind her back the pair of scissors she plunged into Jeffy’s leg seconds ago, Dolly thinks “yes, that’s about how I thought that would go…. what’s next.”
FC: I mean, I guess it’s a kinder reprimand than “this is costing us $75 per person, so you’d better enjoy yourself dammit!” but not much.
GA: Oh, I hope Walt decides he can save money by doing the job himself. I’ve seen tree trimming accident compilations on YouTube and the possibilities are endless.
MW: Note that Mary’s definition of “a good friend” is “someone malleable enough to take vague, shopworn advice, but still so set in their ways that they’re unlikely to make any long term improvement and thus will always need Mary’s guidance.” By this metric, Wilbur is the best friend she could imagine.
@59 Hibbleton: EEEEE!!!! [QLUNQ!]
@60 Banana Jr. 6000: on Crankshaft: You could soak Crankshaft’s clothes in paraffin so he’ll not only go up in flames during one of is pyromaniacal jags, the fire’ll last a lonnng time to be absolutely sure he won’t recover.
MW: Jeff is still ‘on book’ as he stares past Mary to read his lines off a placard.
GIL THORP: Beth “Enough of that! We’ve got guests coming over, and we don’t need you bringing down the orgy.”
Fwiw, my levothyroxine is blue. Guess I’m a plugger.
@Philip: “Plugger’s pride rainbow” with a multicolored pill caddy is a pretty good plugger idea. You should send that in. (If you take that as a mortal insult that requires you to go on a bloody revenge rampage against me, that’s fair.)
What gets me about this one is that Pluggers keeps its references so obvious that the target Plugger audience gets them, even though the joke is usually about how Pluggers don’t get the reference. You’ll never see “When a Plugger gets down bad” with a Plugger who’s fallen and can’t get up, because Pluggers really don’t know what “down bad” means. But they drop “levothyroxine” like everyone’s supposed to be like “Ha ha, good ol’ levothyroxine!” And Josh was indeed like “good ol’ levothyroxine.” Which means Josh is the target audience? Great, now I have two people swearing bloody revenge against me.
@Banana Jr. 6000: I remember that in the greatest ironic twist, Wilbur was the one who led the intervention for Aldo and now he’s essentially the new and unimproved Aldo who is able to be an insane sociopath with Mary’s blessing.
@Hibbleton: I hope he starts reading the stage directions. “Nod and smile politely,” “Look at menu,” “Swallow down the bile rising up your throat.”
Pluggers – It could be worse. Wilford Brimley Dog Man could be dancing and singing about Jardiance.
Rex Morgan MD: Is this the part where Parker gets bitten by a radioactive spider and gets super powers?
C’shaft: But…you know what…it’s literally…oh forget it.
DT: “That’s it? Dude, I make that much while I’m taking a crap in the morning.”
Dustin: Don’t mind me, I’ll just be over here imagining Dustdad getting trampled by bison.
GT: C’mon, Beth, you’re young, attractive (by the standards of your art style) and have a moderately pleasing personality, surely there’s more for you in life than being Gil Thorp’s Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Or rather, his Sightly Happy Vaguely Whimsical Dream Girl.
JP: “Warn them about the beach”? What, is this that place that makes people age at an unnatural rate?
MT: “Mark gets taken by surprise by a Grungey Boy” sounds like something that should be on P0rnhub.
RMMD: “Well, I just hope you aren’t expecting a good bedside manner, or even basic human empathy.”
LUANN: Trufan: “Ugh, why can’t we just go back to the regular ‘real-world’ Luann, where a little girl is destroying the kitchen and her guardians are just standing there helplessly watching her do so, as all real-life adults and authority figures do?”
MW-“After dumping Wilbur’s body into the water I sure worked up an appetite for my usual surf and turf.”
FC-Jeffy’s upset because he’s too young to go on the D-Cup ride.
@Baja Gaijin: I hope the bear eats Weelbur after Weelbur challenges it to a fight to the death for the sandwich.
Mary is so full of herself she doesn’t need anything in that glass.
Pluggers: I have the opposite problem – a hyperactive thyroid, and my pills are small and white. My friend’s cat has the same problem, but she gets her meds as a chicken-flavored liquid.
DT: Ominous G.K. Chesterton: “Rather than bleed them out slowly, my blackmail method is to bankrupt all my victims at one stroke. Now — card, check, or large canvas bags marked with dollar signs?”
@Tom T.: You should have held out for the chicken-flavored liquid.
Electric City – Walt is canonically 124 years old and still both mentally sharp and able to stand on his own. He should be making millions from all the scientists studying him for the secrets to immortality. $7000 is a pittance compared to that.
Can’t wait for another excruciating month of Mary Worth & Dr. Jeff eating at the Bum Boat and talking about how life can be hard (for other people) but is ultimately beautiful (for Mary, anyway).
S4: Ces is starting to draw grown-up Hillary as a Judge Parker woman.
CS: “This joke was funny once, years ago, so I’m going to repeat it this whole week!”
HotC: Come for the armpit hair, stay for the menstruation.
Nancy: The guest artist makes Nancy look like a bug.
GA: When a man gets really old, he has to pay someone a lot of money to grind his stump.
@brendancalling: Forget the Pluggers and their blue pills. It seems you’ve taken the red pill and have seen how deep the rabbit hole of Batty’s imagination goes — a whole 2.7 inches.
Mary Worth: “It’s the least I can do,” Jeff says nervously, expectantly waiting for a reward from Mistress Worth. He will receive naught but a little foreplay, just enough to keep him hooked on her and willing to tolerate Wilbur’s endearing quirks.
Gasoline Alley: “By the way, sir, why do you have a baby tiger as a pet? That’s pretty illegal.”
Family Circus: The delightful, relatable whimsy of a narcissistic mother lecturing at her child in public to stop crying because they’re ruining things for everyone and she’ll give them something to cry about.
Phantom: the Ghost Who Never Quite Seems to GET ON WITH IT ALREADY!
MW: “Speaking of, Mary, I’ve been going through a dry patch, so maybe you could help me feel something?” “Jeff, I’ve been smelling decaying goldfish all day. If there was the slightest chance that was going to happen, I wouldn’t have filled my champagne flute with water.”
MW-Let this end with the whole fish funeral being a fantasy of Wilbur and he is really in a mental hospital getting the proper help he needs.
@Needless Exposition:
A live on stage, Goes Wrong Show version of Mary Worth would be awesome although how much more “over the top” can you play Wilbur?
FC-“No I’m not going to sell you to the carnies. I would have to pay them to take you away.”
FC: Thel tells Jeffy; “Sorry. I should’ve known an amusement park named Plato’s Retreat wouldn’t be that much fun for you guys but your father insisted.”
FC: “Do you see now, Jeffy? This is what the godless heathens consider a fun place! Men dressed as cartoon characters doing horrible things – that’s what the secular mainstream considers fun. Your father will back me once he gets back from going to the bathroom and definitely not changing out of a rented Goofy costume.”
GA – $7000 may sound a little high, but keep in mind that it includes the $1000 kickback to Gertie for hiring this guy. She shouldn’t have to put up with Walt’s annoying bullshit day after day just for the pittance he pays her!
Don Abundio, translated:
“She loves me, she loves my money, she loves me, she loves my money, she loves me!”
“I deserve a big kiss!”
“We’re both willing to suspend our disbelief!”
JP:
“Did you warn them about the beach?”
A sullen Lucas replies; “What do I care if their snatches get infested with sand fleas?”
@Needless Exposition:
And Jeff left his wallet at home. And is going to pull out his pockets to emphasize this. Mary is going to end up schtupping the waiter.
Ah yes, but the big question is, what is our good Mary holding in her hand?
@102 Tony Polar: We can be sure it’s not Dr. Jeff’s penis. Mary has a special set of 10-foot exorcism tongs for that.
FC: The censors had to cut out Mommy’s REAL words: “I paid $150 f***** so that you and your melonheads have some f****** fun. We’re going home right now and you’re going to bed without supper! Or do you want that clown to take you home to his crawl space?”
Pluggers: I’ve been taking levothyroxine since I was a teenager, probably 15 years now, and it has always been either purple or salmon colored. I’m not that surprised that the subtext of today’s Pluggers is “Pluggers’ spouses are trying to kill them slowly by swapping their meds”, but I am kind of surprised that this is something they apparently have in common with Josh.
An underrated part of The Family Circus is the parents are assholes
Looks like all the Cool Kids here have thyroid abnormalities. I really must attend a Mudge get-together sometime. “Good evening, sir. You’ll want the big table in the corner, with all the goiters.”
@Voshkod: I get all my old man meds in the form of chicken-flavored liquid. One nice bowl of hot soup at bedtime and I’m set for the day. Ask YOUR pharmacist about the chicken-flavored liquid option!
@107 Ukulele Ike: And in another corner is the swollen hemorrhoids table, AKA the Plugger table. And in yet another corner is the self-centered neurotics table AKA the Sally Forth/Judge Parker table.
JP: There’s a Pet Sematary back among those dunes, and Sophie and Reena are about to be eaten by Stephen King-style zombies.
@The Ghost of Jarrod: re GA: “Walt is canonically 124 years old and still both mentally sharp and able to stand on his own.”
Would he be interested in running for POTUS?
RMMD:
“Oh, Corey — so good of you to come. You know, I got a container of Jiffy Pop stuck in my hair; and, well, the next thing you know, it got hot outside, and the darned thing started to expand, and — well, you see the results!”
Luann: The guest artist appears to be devolving into some sort of John Kricfalusi-style madness. By the end of the week, we may be seeing Fake Toni and Brad wearing rubber nipples on their heads and spanking each other with steaks.
If Pluggers still used pick-up lines:
“What color is your thyroid pill?”
I find it odd that one needs to know what Levothyroxine is to get the joke in Pluggers. While I thank Josh for explaining, I realized that regardless if I know the context or not, there is no “joke” to get!
I feel ripped-off and I don’t even pay to read these comics.
@Ukulele Ike:
I relish the idea of pitting as many Stephen King horrors on them as possible.
-Stalked by a evil clown demon
-Have them run over by a sentient vehicle
-Send them back in time and have them be devoured by entities who devour the past
-Trap them in a time-looped room that scares them for all eternity until they give into suicide
Etc… etc…
Mary Worth – “Quirks” such as behaving more immaturely than a four year old over a fucking goldfish. Yeah, sure. At least this time she didn’t refer to them as “endearing” quirks.
Mary: “Okay, we’ve given you a perfunctory thank you for using your boat. Enough about you. Now it’s time to thank me and heap praise on me.”
Rex Morgan – Of course he is. Rex is scrubbing for brain surgery right now.
Crankshaft – A quarter inch from reality.
9CL – This is totally lacking in anything resembling humor, but at least it isn’t the psychotic twins watching their parents boink.
@Dr. Larry Erhardt: “Luann, you EEEDIOT!” Yup, that works.
Luann – So Toni’s fantasy is that Shannon would behave. Brad’s fantasy seems to be that Toni would put out nonstop.
@Baja Gaijin: Mashups – I enjoyed all of them. My eyebrows still haven’t reverted to their usual position after seeing what’s on Wilbur’s phone.
@Hibbleton: I first read that as “drunk tank.”
@ectojazzmage: Re FC – “Or I’ll give you something to cry about” is on my list of things never to say to a child. What a horrible thing to say. I can totally see the Keanes saying it. And feeling sanctimonious while they say it.
@Liam: Maybe he’s been in a mental hospital all along, and the reception and fish funeral were all elaborately staged to make him think it was real. You know – Shitter Island.
Mary Worth: I never really noticed before, but Dr. Jeff clearly has his eyebrows professionally shaped and colored. Which means the Reed Richards-style dark-on-top, gray-on-the-sides hair must be a deliberate choice as well. Is it possible that the good doctor is, like, 35, and has been cosplaying as a near-retiree all these years in order to land himself a GILF? It wouldn’t be the worst thing anyone has ever done in this strip, but it would explain how he manages to stay so fit and healthy on a diet of fish squares and muffins.
Pluggers: Does anyone take a little blue boner pill each day? Maybe this plugger has been overdosing on Viagra, which has the rare side effect of blue-tinted vision. (Or maybe he’s just naturally colorblind, because, you know — dog.)
Family Circus: Giant Creepy Clown Land (TM) is supposed to be a fun place, Jeffy! Don’t you want to go on a ride that takes you half a mile into space on a precarious track, then sends you hurtling at rocket speed back toward the hard earth? No? Well, at least let your mom buy you another cotton candy and ice cream so you can throw up again. How about meeting Kooky the Creepy Clown (TM) himself? Give him a hug! Stupid kid, you don’t even know when you’re having the best time of your life!
Phantom – Aha! It’s monkeys all the way down!
FC- “This is supposed to be a fun place, Jeffy! The fact that Daddy fell out of the roller coaster doesn’t change that!”
@BigTed: Pluggers: Does anyone take a little blue boner pill each day?
Not since Bob Dole passed away.
RMMD: “How’s Parker?”
“Things are pretty normal. The ER attendant pushed him around a little bit before the doc pulled him off. Then they took him to radiology, and the x-ray tech made fun of him. During transport, the orderly gave him a wedgie and a wet willie. When we got to his room, a couple nurses dragged him off the gurney and slammed him onto his bed. Then the lab assistant enjoyed the blood draw a little too much if you ask me. There’s just something about him that makes people hate him. His only friends are pathetic losers . . . uh, present company excepted, of course.”
“C’mon Corey, we’re outta here.”
To keep Josh from running afoul with the FDA, everyone needs to read the following as quickly as possible while imagining beautifully shot footage of Pluggers antique shopping, playing pickleball, and burying goldfish at sea:
Side effects of levothyroxine may include blurred or double vision; change in appetite; chest pain, discomfort, or tightness; crying; decreased urine output; diarrhea; difficult or labored breathing; difficulty with swallowing; dilated neck veins; dizziness; extreme fatigue; eye pain; fainting; false or unusual sense of well-being; fast, slow, irregular, pounding, or racing heartbeat or pulse; fear or nervousness; feeling not well or unhappy; feeling of discomfort; feeling of warmth; feeling things are not real; feelings of suspicion and distrust; fever; finding the comic strip Alice remotely funny; hair loss; heat intolerance; hives or welts, skin itching, rash, or redness; increased appetite; irritability; lack or slowing of normal growth in children; limp or walk favoring one leg; menstrual changes; mental depression; muscle weakness; nausea; pain in the hip or knee; pain or discomfort in the arms, jaw, back, or neck; rapidly changing moods; restlessness; seizures; severe headache; stomach cramps; sweating; swelling of the eyes, face, lips, throat, or tongue; tremors; trouble getting pregnant; trouble sitting still; unusual tiredness or weakness; vomiting; and weight gain or loss. Other side effects may also occur. If you notice any other effects, check with your healthcare professional.
Luann: If only ma and pa Degroot taught their kids about birth control. Or any sex ed.
All you mudges with your multicolored pills have been taking M&Ms this whole time. The placebo effect works wonders!
MW: Sincerest apologies if this has already been mentioned but WTF is Mary holding?? It looks like a vial of angel grace from Supernatural…
Taking pills doesn’t make you a plugger, but staring at them while you contemplate what to do with them might.
Ready for the 4th?
Not until you’ve read GoComics’ fourteen 4th of July comics!
@1 Baja Gaijin:
Number one. Just beccause.
@Baja Gaijin: re mashups: I really gotta thank you, BG, for givin’ Ol’ Rex that cameo today. You see, he’s been goin’ through a rough patch lately … remember all those roles and publicity he was getting last year with Summer of the Bear 23? Well, when things moved on… as they always do… to Fishapalooza 24, he went into an awful funk and was sitting around all day, looking at his scrapbooks … even talking about leaving The Business!
I think he and Wilbur did some “bonding” there on the set – they like the same brand of mayo! – and he’s generally in a much better mood today. At least has his appetite back… Oh, I wanna make it clear that the “Goldfish” showing up on Wilbur’s phone is NOT one of our clients! Just some botton-feeders trying to cash in on the Fish craze…
H&L: Oh yeah? Just wait until you’re old enough to read Slylock Fox.
Luann: The Evansii are deliberately trying to get this strip cancelled, right? Maybe some tax thing?
GT: “Really, honey, it doesn’t bother me at all that you keep obsessing over your ex-wife. Not a bit. Not me. Nope.”
CS: The sad part is that Mopey is marrying into a family that is actually smarter than him.
@Hibbleton: This is where we could have had the late Chris Farley use his Matt Foley persona and yell about how Wilbur’s going to be closer to Stellan when he’s living in a van down by the river.
@mw: Jeff’s more likely to schtup the waiter because of his realization that even after wasting money, fuel, and a tux rental, the only thing Mary is giving him is a trip to get more hand lotion.
Blondie: The creators of this strip apologize for the fact that a panel in which something amusing was said was left off of today’s installment.
JP: “You mean, Did I warn them that they won’t be able to hear the sound of the ocean in a seashell because the sound of the real ocean is louder? Nah, screw ’em.”
@Cleveland Mocks: re: RMMD: I’ve been thinking for weeks that I’d really enjoy a shot at bullying Parker. I’d probably stick with the simple left jab to the chin method, given that glass jaw of theirs. Repeated left jabs to the chin. Again and again and again.
MW: I’m sorry how exactly is Wilbur a friend to anyone? he does allow Mary to feel superior and well adjusted by contrast but that’s not friendship really. It’s merely a way for Mary to gather praise for dealing with the entitled man baby that is Wilbur. That he’s an alcoholic is kind of a tell here. Mary is an enabler
@131 Sequitur: I like #3. Had I thought of it before the other two, I wouldn’t have created the others.
@12 Sid, Agent to the Animal Stars!: That fish is a model for those crackers people feed their toddlers.
@Professor Fate: Seeing Mary acknowledge Wilbur as her friend is like those high school dramas where the biggest bitch on the show has a friend who isn’t popular because the writers want her to be seen as sympathetic.
@Hibbleton: Read as DRUNK tank initially.
MW: “Yes, Mary, if you have any other neurotic screwball friends who need a boat ride to cure them, please feel free to make another gigantic imposition on me. Now, can we get on with the peck on the cheek you promised me? I’ve been fantasizing about it for two days.”
MW – If I can pander to my busybody girlfriend in an incredibly remote shot at getting laid, hey – it’s the least I could do….
Pluggers – Pluggers are way too cheap to buy boner pills….
GA – Based on the look on Hobbs’ face, I can only assume the guy has his dick out and it’s pretty impressive. But then he is a modern woodsman….
FC – If you can’t have fun eating $20 ice creams with $10 sodas, it’s a sad life ahead, Jeffy….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
FG: Vultan just immediately confesses to his crime as soon as he’s asked? What is this, Dick Tracy?
Heath: I … guess the joke is that this is an elite fish market, so Heathcliff is attempting to prove his eliteness with those classic rich guy signifiers, a top hat and, um, a penny-farthing bicycle?? But honestly, I’m less concerned with the joke, and more with the fact this penny-farthing doesn’t have pedals, and Heathcliff’s tiny little legs wouldn’t reach them if it did.
JP: Okay, I guess it is Lucas who Ces’s random AITA? spinner ended on. Shame he didn’t wait for it to stop before he started writing the story.
@Anonymous: That was me, inexplicably logged out as soon as I hit “post” again.
MW: It looks like Mary is holding an immersion blender. Does the Bum Boat make its patrons prepare their own meals now?
@Baja Gaijin: #1
#3 made me snort my Snapple tea all over my desk!!! I love the others, too!
Pluggers:@Flipper: Side effects of levothyroxine may include… crying… feeling things are not real… finding the comic strip Alice remotely funny…
Levothyroxine is a hell of a drug.
@Baja Gaijin: “Barf Boat” — I love it! And my vote is for #3, though I really like them all.
@Needless Exposition: #2
Considering how Wilbur has behaved himself in the past at restaurants (Thai food – dribbling noodles down his shirt and knocking over Iris’ glass of wine while role-playing Neo from the Matrix in a vain effort to impress Iris which totally embarrassed Estelle), I can understand why Mary did not invite him to join her and Jeff for dinner. Wilbur would have put the “Bum” in “Bum Boat” for sure.
MW:
“Thanks for what you did for Wilbur today.”
“It was no problem. Now about what you’re going to do for me, and I’m going to do to you, tonight.”
“Oh, you do have your quirks, don’t you?”
Pluggers: *MY* levothyroxine is *green*!!!!! But I also have leftover yellow and purple…maybe I can just dump them all in a bowl and pick one or two at random while blindfolded! Wouldn’t that be fun!!!!
@Daisy: Personally Mary could use the embarrassment to realize that Wilbur isn’t a “good friend who’s a work in progress with many endearing quirks” but a boorish, self serving sociopath whose world begins and ends with Wilbur.
Family Circus: “That’s what I hear Daddy say every time he walks into your bedroom. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha.”
Pluggers: My dog takes levothyroxine pills and they’re robin’s egg blue. Since this is a dog plugger beastman it looks like the color monkeys nailed it for once.
@Needless Exposition: #8
Oh my goodness – rereading those linked panels and commentaries has me in stitches!!! Oh, if only we could see more of Libby and the other assorted C’stone pets – they are magnificent and far, far more interesting and entertaining than the stupid people. WE WANT LIBBY!!! WHAT DO WE WANT? [LIBBY!!] WHEN DO WE WANT IT? [RIGHT NOW!]
GA:
“Whaat? My hearing aid’s been acting up lately. It sounded like you said ‘$7000’.”
“I did.”
“Whaat? My hearing aid’s been acting up lately. It sounded like you said ‘I did’.”
“I did.”
“Whaat? My hearing aid’s been acting up lately. It sounded like you said ‘I did’.”
“I did.”
“Whaat? My hearing aid’s been …”
“All right, all right, I’ll do it for $300. Just make this stop.
GA: Heck – Walt should just ask Rufus, Joel and their loyal mule Becky to come over and haul away that tree. They might even do it for free, they’re that clueless…
Um, what happened to “Luann”??? Something is not quite…right…I WISH I KNEW WHAT WAS GOING ON!!!!! *SOB!!*
@Don’t taze me bro: Direct from the drunk tank to the dunk tank. It’s an old Arizona/Bil Keane tradition!
@Anonymous: Re: FG: Why wouldn’t he? It’s not like the Earthers can do anything about it. “Hello, Operator? Get me the Sky City Police!”
@Voshkod: #56
Egad, yes!!! Truth be told, *no one* should go on any rides! The so-called “kiddie rides” can be intimidating! I should know – I’m still traumatized from the “spinning teacups” and “frog hopper.”
GT: WHAT DINNER??? WHAT GUESTS???? WHAT IS GOING ON??? GAAAAA!!!!!
@The Breathtaking Bonehead Brothers:
“Whaat? My hearing aid’s been acting up lately. It sounded like you said ‘Sympathy Soothing Syrup’.”
If we’re following the Sally Forth aging process, Bettina should walk by with a cane and a Life Alert bracelet.
Pluggers
I’m amazed at how many people on this blog use levothyroxine, a drug that I had never had heard of. And how nobody uses viagra, a drug that I have heard of. Interestingly, a 2021 study showed that 23 million people use levothyroxine but 90% don’t need it.
Great news, Frazz gang! That lot on Butler is going to be the “Hello, Larry Experience” for the rest of the summer before Dow Chemical breaks ground.
@Unca $crooge: I take it (blue). But I’m tapering off Zoloft because of weight gain. I know you didn’t ask, but hey, now you know more about me!
P: If you’re about to suffer a major medical incident due to pharmacy error, you’re a plugger.
MW: Dr. Jeff muses about developing some “quirks” of his own, wondering what might get him into Mary’s granny pants at long last.
Beetle Bailey Spanish to English.
“Is the General in?”
“Yes, but don’t wake him up.”
“Why is he asleep?”
“He always falls asleep after sex.”
GA: I do love the fact that the estimate isn’t itemized at all but just ends in an arbitrary number. This guy might as well just have “$7,000” printed on the middle finger of his work glove.
MW: A waitress stops by the booth and sees that Jeff has emptied his scotch. “Shall I bring you another?” she asks. “No,” he replies. “Bring the bottle.”
C-Shaft: How can it be unidentified when you just identified it? You know what? Never mind. Any excuse for an explanation you might come up with would only hurt my brain.
GT: Whether or not Gil has stubble at any given moment has as much internal consistency as the sportsball.
H&L: One day years from now Professor Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters will be rocked by the entrance of a mutant so powerful she could see a worm in the beak of a bird facing away from her 60 feet away back when she was an infant.
JP: Okay, Lucas has the name “Lucas” and he has that hair, so until I’m inevitably disappointed I’m going to assume the warning he should have given Sophie and Reena about the beach is that there’s a hungry Sarlacc under the sand.
Luann: Toni may have gotten the sudden urge to have a rabbit-size litter of kiddos with Bwad, but her Fogsitt-ized imagination isn’t capable of depicting it as a good idea.
Phantom: “What the hell!? Why does it say ‘DHARMA Initiative’ on everything?”
RMMD: Things look bleak for Judy right now, what with her nephew not only injured but being treated by Rex Morgan. One bright spot is that while Corey is an aspiring comic, he’s too young to have a bad Cary Grant impression in is repertoire.
MW: Is Mary about to chow down on a candle light bulb?
Luann: I would love if “Miss Inner Beauty “ would drop by Bwads. I cannot imagine how the guest artist would portray her.
My guess would be as a statuesque teen all a glow.
My thyroid med is non-generic–my doctor said it would stop my levels from jumping up and down, as they’ve done for years–and therefore expensive. They’re little yellow gel thingies. That means I’m not a plugger. Yay.
@149 Anonymous: I’m glad someone noticed. Thanks!
@163 Peanut Gallery: I thought Yhtapmys Soothing Syrup is what Jack Benny promoted on his show that one time?
Okay, here’s a question for the long-term Mary Worth superfans, which probably includes Josh: Have we ever seen, possibly years or decades ago, actual evidence of Wilbur being a “good friend”? As long as I’ve been paying attention he’s been either a repellent jerk or a down-on-his-luck shmoe, I can’t recall any time he did something “supportive” or “friendly”.
@Baja Gaijin: Where did that image of the outside of the restaurant come from?
MW-Damned by faint praise?
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: MW: Mary looks like she’s drinking out of a wine aerator.
@Baja Gaijin: You should have Wilbur holding a package of sea monkeys.
@Artist formerly known as Ben: Luann: Actually, most of those kids look more like TJ.
Luann-Have chocolate cake.
@Jeffmcm:
Good point. I’m racking my brain and coming up snake-eyes. I was about to say that Wilbur was friendly and supportive to his Not-Son, but Wilbur being Wilbur, that seems more like he just really, really wanted a son (which was probably why Dawn was so pissed off) and he wanted to, in effect, brag that he once had sex with a hot hippie chick in college. So I’m not counting that because it was really all about Wilbur (as usual.)
@178 Jeffmcm:
Look at the top of the blog where Josh posted today’s Mary Worth. That outside of the restaurant shot was already in the original. Baja changed the name to “The Barf Boat”.
@I speak Jive:
That would make ‘Mary Worth’ rather interesting if it really was a mental institution.
@Liam:
“Dad is great!
For breakfast, he gives us chocolate cake!”
— Bill Cosby
@cheech wizard: You know way back in the day, Brad actually told Dirk that he needs to respect Toni and treat her like a person and now he’s imagining her being nothing more than a baby making factory. The irony is not lost on me.
Note on Rex Morgan M.D. Tomorrow you get to meet Randy’s dad.
@astroboy: The nicest gesture that Wilbur did that I could remember was when he took Dawn on a cruise after she was sulking about her latest breakup but then disaster struck…and Wilbur ended up using that disaster to further his career by exploiting other peoples’ stories.
Bob Mankoff Presents: Show Me The Funny (Animal Edition): Bianca Xunise’s dog.
FC: I’d bet that clown image on the far left is on a sign that says “FUNHOUSE.” If so, I’m with crying Jeffy. I had to be pretty much dragged out of a very dark funhouse wheel where I had been knocked down and was lying on the bottom of the wheel being accidentally stepped on and kicked by a crowd of teens, way back when I was Little Poteet.
Wait, what am I saying??!! Try the funhouse, Jeffy!! It’s fun! It’s a barrel of laughs! Especially try the wheel! You too, Dolly! And Ma Keane, you just leave them to it and wander away for an hour or so.
@Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol: He let’s us work on his pudding pop….
@Jeffmcm: Here’s a highly-optimistic quotation by a kindly person who is describing someone else. It’s from an old Nora Ephron essay. “Somewhere there must be something good about him that we’ll find out about eventually.”
While Wilbur broods over how all the women he’s pursued reject him for somebody way better, does it bother him that even his intrusive old landlady keeps company with a fit doctor who owns a yacht? I see him going full incel in the near future.
@Artist formerly known as Ben: Given that Sophie and Reena are playing in the sand, I’m hoping they turn up a Psammead. Terrible things may be in store because they’re too dumb to make proper wishes.
“I want a twelve-inch pianist!”
FG: Joke’s on you, Vultan. If you and the witch-bitch had just waited a few weeks you could’ve saved yourselves some serious coin on a hit man. Ronal died fighting a giant ice monster up in Frigia. Bet you feel like a real sap now.
@178 Jeffmcm: The panel in the second mashup’s from a strip run on 8/12/23. I added Wilbur. The first panel is from today’s strip. I changed the name.
@185 Sequitur: Thanks.
@192 Poteet: A “fun house” with an EVILSCARYCLOWN outside? Big NOPE on that.
@Baja Gaijin: Why is Mary drinking from a roll on deodorant?
Sex Organ V.D.: Don’t worry, Parker Lewis can’t lose, except against Ferris Buller’s copyright lawyers.
@Flipper: #125
I’ve been taking levothyroxine for a long time…this certainly explains a lot…a LOT…of my “endearing quirks…”
“Can any place containing Jeffy Rosebud Keene truly be called a Fun place?”- Tom Servo,Esq.
“Is this the episode where we discover Thel is a were-kangarootaur?”- Mike Nelson.
@Needless Exposition: #153
I sure do agree. But…I am not sure Mary is capable of being embarrassed…I don’t think I’ve ever seen it in all the years I’ve been reading the strip.
@199 Garrison Skunk: Cheaper than an alcoholic drink?
@Ultrasnark 4000: #154
HA HA HA HA!!!
@Poteet: Something similar happened to me when I was a child. I was in one of those large rotating barrels, and I kept falling until I started freaking out and crying. They stopped the barrel so I could get out. No one stepped on me, but it’s still not a pleasant memory.
We’ve been going to Hershey Park for the past several years, and they no longer have any fun houses. There used to be two – one with crazy mirrors and that barrel, and the other creepy and dark. I haven’t been to any other parks, but here the water attractions are a big thing.
Late Thread Cuisine: In 1984, Clara Peller asked “Where’s the beef?” It ain’t here.
@Lord Flatulence: #181
…with Wilbur actually believing that the sea monkeys are real little sentient creatures that have their own hierarchies, King and Queen, tiny castles and villages…
@207 Baja Gaijin:
Some might attempt to eat a sardine infused pastry roll but not me. Leave it for the bears.
I’m not sure if you may want to take a day off tomorrow but I’ll leave you this anyway.
@Baja Gaijin: #207
Aw, doggone it…that’s just cruel to the sardines.
@Baja Gaijin: Late thread cuisine : I wondered what the yellow and white ingredients are, but I guess that egg slicer is a clue. I do like the fish cutting board, but as for the rest of it: nope. Too heavy on the pastry and glop.
@Daisy: I take it too. My pills are kind of orange. Now I have something new to blame for not getting on COTW lists on Fridays. After reading that list of side effects, I’m surprised I’m not weeping copiously right now.
@Baja Gaijin: Julia and Winston were forced to eat this.
@Baja Gaijin: Out of all the fish that they could have used, they had to use sardines.
PLUGGERS:. Thanks for your medical reveal, Josh. I’ve taken Levothyroxine for 15 years and had assumed hypothyroidism was a problem for menopausal women. Good to know menopausal men deal with it too. :-)
CURTIS:. Horrified that his son got an undeserved plate of food from the other family’s reunion, Greg will take him over to apologize. Then all four will get a plate of reunion food by Friday.
@Baja Gaijin:
#1. MW. Thanks for making a role for Rex, Baja. Sid said he can use the work, and his gravitas is such a pleasure to view.
MW: if a goldfish crosses over to Paradise I hope he would face something better than swimming in small circles and seeing Wilbur’s face.
@209 Sequitur: Bears love eating stinky rotting stuff. I wonder why one hasn’t gone near Mary Worth’s…not completing that sentence.
@210 Daisy: A certain goldfish I can mention probably would have loved the dignity of being buried in puff pastry instead of getting freezer burn before being chucked into the Pacific Ocean.
@211 I speak Jive: If the best thing one can say about a meal is the serving plate is adorable, it probably came from Mary Worth’s kitchen.
@213 Poteet: George Orwell never imagined anything like this.
@214 Needless Exposition: Seriously, would this be any better with cod or salmon? I think not.
@216 Activist 1234: So often things are improved with Added Ursine.
@217 Professor Well Actually: When a goldfish crosses over to Paradise, he would face the “Welcome to Las Vegas” sign and a whole lot of large casinos. Paradise, Nevada, that is.
@BeckoningChasm: Mary Worth: What the heck is Mary holding?
_______________
A) a roll-on deodorant
B) the universal remote Mary has connected to Dr Jeff’s brain.
C) Dr Jeff’s junk
D) Yappyfox
Slap him, Thiel. Go to your fun place.
@Cleveland Mocks:
Turns out it’s harder than it looks. Even Brooke McEldowney hasn’t managed it.
@Baja Gaijin:
@216 Activist 1234: So often things are improved with Added Ursine.
______________
©2024 The Crankshaft Institue For Proper Coyote Urine Use
and National Misspellers of America Union 563, Wally Ballou, Pres.
@Artist formerly known as Ben: @Cleveland Mocks:
Luann: The Evansii are deliberately trying to get this strip cancelled, right? Maybe some tax thing?
Turns out it’s harder than it looks. Even Brooke McEldowney hasn’t managed it.
__________________
Have they had a character make sweet, sweet love to a giant Sandwhich, yet? I understand that works just as badly.
@224 Garrison Skunk: Whaaa…?
@Baja Gaijin: Curious you should mention that. Coulibiac is a classic, elaborate Russian fish pie — salmon or sturgeon, with rice, dill, mushrooms, hardboiled eggs, etc. — that so impressed Escoffier that he brought it to France and prepared it in dozens of variations.
I learned about it through a long quote from Anton Chekov’s comic short story “The Siren,” in which a group of men sequestered during a legal proceeding are tortured by one of them weaving sensuous narratives about luscious foods. If anyone can find the text online (1887, it must be here somewhere) please post a link.
”Chekov’s Coulibiac,” of course, is the literary trope stating that if the playwright introduces a Coulibiac in Act I, it must be cut into and consumed by the end of the play.
@Baja Gaijin: Curious you should mention that. Coulibiac is a classic, elaborate Russian fish pie — salmon or sturgeon, with rice, dill, mushrooms, hardboiled eggs, etc. — that so impressed Escoffier that he brought it to France and prepared it in dozens of variations.
I learned about it through a long quote from Anton Chekov’s comic short story “The Siren,” in which a group of men sequestered during a legal proceeding are t0rtured by one of them weaving sensuous narratives about luscious foods. If anyone can find the text online (1887, it must be here somewhere) please post a link. Yum yum fish pie description.
”Chekov’s Coulibiac,” of course, is the literary trope stating that if the playwright introduces a Coulibiac in Act I, it must be cut into and consumed by the end of the play.
When do we get to the surprise twist that Stellen is the reincarnated form of Mary Worth’s dead husband, Banana Barney?
@Poteet: #212
Good heavens, yes…I had no idea that innocuous little pill has so many side effects (mainly because I never read the medication fact sheets the pharmacy includes and…[someone whispering offside]…oh…you mean we’re *supposed* to read those sheets? I’ll be darned! No wonder I feel so giddy! )
Anyway, Poteet, I know what you’re saying. I break out in hives and uncontrollable weeping when I read “Mary Worth” too. And I’m CONFIDENT you’ll make COTW!! I’m pullin’ for ya!
Okay, this is starting to worry me. The way I figure it, either I don’t really belong on this forum, or I must have an undiagnosed thyroid disorder.
@I speak Jive: “Pastry and Glop” is tomorrow’s recipe card!
@Baja Gaijin: God, that’s horrible! The only thing worse would be anchovies.
@230 Peanut Gallery:
Plugger and everybody else’s drug.
I never even HEARD of that drug until today.
@ld: Since this week is apparently Brad’s imagination (versus Toni’s sub-1990s Spielberg WB animation look last week) if we go into Luann’s head next week I’m picturing more crayon stick figures talking in monosyllabic babyspeak.
@Peanut Gallery: “Pastry and Glop”
___________
They headlined at the Palace after Olsen and Johnson reopened “Hellzapopping” at the Stardust.
@232 Lord Flatulence: I put both sardines and anchovies on the same level of grodiness. I’d rather not have either with my time zone and at least two adjoining ones.
@233 Sequitur: I, too, was surprised so many Mudges take the pill.
@235 Garrison Skunk: Didn’t Pastry and Glop open for Gail Martin on her Tarzana Nights world tour?
@237 Baja Gaijin:
I thought Pastry and Glop were attorneys for Dagwood.
@Sequitur: I get ALL my best dope information here at the Comics Curmudgeon. The best heroin? Up to Lexington 125. Feel sick and dirty, more dead than alive,
@238 Sequitur: Who says they can’t be both?
@250 Baja Gaijin:
No one and they probably are.
@209 Sequitur: I didn’t think I could make a mashup of tomorrow’s Mary Worth. I was wrong. Thank goodness they reuse artwork!
@239 Ukulele Ike:
I’m glad New York is not my scene.
@242 Baja Gaijin:
I am curious what you came up with. Wilbur dressed as a Redcoat eating mayo on crumpets?
@244 Sequitur: Uh, well, you’ll see in about 8 hours or so.
Levothyroxine color varies by dose. If you took 150 micrograms per tablet, you’d get blue pills.
https://www.prestoimages.net/store30/rd14324/14324_pd3199656_2_levothyroxine.jpg
@245 Baja Gaijin:
I’m done for the night. @246 Carl Fink: just posted a rude long link which makes my phone almost impossible to read.
@I speak Jive: Belated sympathies, and crying was a very sensible thing to do. I vaguely remember trying to crawl out of the barrel, but the one I was in would rotate, then jerk to a stop, then start rotating again, causing me to keep tumbling around under other people’s feet, and I bizarrely thought I wasn’t allowed to yell for help. I checked Wiki and that kind of rotating barrel was sometimes called a “barrel of love.” Huh.
@Hibbleton:
FC: Looks like the booth to the far right is “manned” by a topless woman. That’s probably not the kind of fun Jeffy had in mind.
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Has P.J. been cheating on Thel with another rack?
Pluggers: I take a little blue pill every day too! Mine is estrogen, though; I’m pretty sure that makes me an anti-plugger?
I, at the age of 63, take a blue pill – Finasteride. Ironically, it’s for my prostate.
@Al of the Christian Singles Jungle Patrol: There’s always room for Roofies.
The Famillar Mucus: “This is supposed to be a FUN place!” “You’re supposed to not cheat on Daddy with anything wearing pants!, Dolly’s supposed to be eating something.” “Spock! Did we just witness the birth of a new Keane Gremlin?” “We did Captain, we witnessed the birth of Sposta Bee, quite possibly the next step in Jeffy Keane’s evolution.”- Kirk and Spock, “Keane Trek : The Motion Picture” (adapted)
Pluggers are still on the fence about voting for blue M&Ms™