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Bizarro, 8/17/24

Hey, have you heard of the concept of “burial at sea?” Well, get this, what if there’s a sort of cool party guy — you know, the kind who wears Hawaiian shirts on the regular — who spends a lot of time in hot tubs, and so he requests a “burial at jacuzzi?” Would be pretty funny, right? Not clear if he means his private home jacuzzi, or the one in his condo complex, or just some random jacuzzi in a hotel or gym somewhere, but it would a pretty funny concept if you dumped this guy’s corpse into it, and it slowly bloated and rotted there, and some poor soul stumbled upon it days later, discovering a jacuzzi that has now been turned into an awful soup full of human guts … wait, no, did I say funny? I meant horrible! It would be horrible! Did we already do a cartoon about this, based on the premise from earlier in the paragraph, when it seemed more innocent and carefree? We did? And you’re saying it’s published in newspapers for God and everyone to see? Ah shit ah shit!

Mary Worth, 8/17/24

Oh yeah, also Dr. Ed proposed to Estelle or whatever, which I haven’t bothered talking about because it’s just been two solid weeks of talking about how much they love each other without any hint of upcoming dramatic conflict of any kind. Today, we finally get a glimpse at what an actual story might hold: is it possible that Ed and Estelle are going to be spending too much time together? She already works for him (without pay!) so maybe the scam-prone Estelle is being pulled into a little two-person cult from which she won’t be able to escape. Remember, the court can’t force a wife to testify against her husband for various animal-related crimes, the way it could force a nephew to testify against his uncle!