Mostly dads
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Family Circus, 5/2/26
A thing about one-panel comic strips is that it can be hard to tell what order things are happening in, and a thing about the Family Circus is that I actually don’t have a strong sense of how Big Daddy Keane feels about basic gender stuff. What I’m saying is that I don’t know if his little smile is a reaction to what Dolly is saying, and he’s thinking “Heh, it’s true, we both love our pretty little baubles, I hadn’t thought of that,” or if it’s a glimpse of the last moment of his good mood right before his daughter’s observation ruins the whole rest of his day.
Dennis the Menace, 5/2/26
Most of the time you can pretend that Dennis the Menace more or less takes place in the 1950s, but I do kind of enjoy the dissonance this causes when they jam some reference to modernity in there. Yes, Henry Mitchell lives in a world where making electronic payments via smartphone apps is an everyday occurrence that a child would be well aware of, and yet he’s still wearing a tuxedo to church.
Herb and Jamaal, 5/2/26
Hey, Jamaal, fun fact: if you’re not going to send it, you don’t even have to be online! You could just purge all your negative energy into a Word doc or something. Just saying it would be an extra layer of security, I know from experience that “send” button can be tempting!
157 replies to “Mostly dads”
FC-“Daddy, tell me again the story about the time you and Mr. Fredo went fishing.”
MW-Once again let’s go over the signs of being scammed that this story brought up.
Luann-Oh yes. Being a graduate of one of Mrs. Foghat’s classes will open all kinds of doors for Luann.
We just don’t want to admit that Jamaal is showing a far healthier attitude to social media than we have.
H&J: (Click!) Makes sense that Jamal’s off-brand laptop uses a toggle switch for a delete key.
DtM:
Wow. Roger C. Carmel and Eva Marie Saint are sitting behind the Mitchells at the service. I didn’t know they were an item.
Family Circus:
“Coming up with a hook to describe your box was a hard thing to tackle, Dad! Now, I’m trying to draw you into this atrocious word play hook, line and sinker, but apparently, you won’t take the bait!”
DtM:
“Do people still dress up for church services, Dad, or are we kind of in a ’50s time machine here?”
Jamaal’s index finger seems to be a foot-and-a-half long in the last panel. He’s popular with the ladies is what I’m trying to say.
DtM: The real question is whether Henry donates in 1950s dollars or today’s money.
Family Circus:
“Dad, I see that you have something in that box that no member of the Mets’ pitching staff has this year: a sinker that actually works!”
Snuffy Smith vs Crankshaft : Today is Free Comic Book Day. Guess which of these strips celebrates it, and which seemingly could not care less and just does a “Look at these idiot bumpkins!” joke.
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Dennis the Menace : Yeah, that LOOKS like a tuxedo, but it’s actually one of those prop outfits they use for graduation photos… or at the funeral home…. or by strippers.
…Hey, are we SURE Hank works a boring, square job at an office, and not somewhere else?…
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Family Circus vs Herb and Jamaal : Big Daddy Keane is actually thinking “and mine is actually a box for that kind of stuff, instead of a recycled box for butter cookies you idiots are always opening and spilling all over.”, but chooses to hit ‘delete’ instead of ‘send’ on that comment, even though it wasn’t that provocative.
…And neither was Jamaal, knowing him. It was probably something like “Your opinion on this event is bad, and your having that opinion makes you a bad person!”, or something even vaguer.
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Hagar the Horrible : Yeah, this is what it looks like when you go through your inheritance from a relative that was a hoarder. I see Hagar is the “WE CAN’T THROW ANY OF *THIS* AWAY, IF MY DAD KEPT THIS IT MUST BE PRECIOUS SOMEHOW” type.
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Luann : …this stupid storyline was all just a set-up to come up with a pretext to reuse last year’s cancelled “Luann goes to camp” storyline? REALLY!?
…the positive, at least we might finally get confirmation that storyline was pulled because it involved Luann’s bunkhouse getting flooded by heavy rain.
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Moose & Molly : Aw, Chester is a grandpa
*now! And the Vlasic Stork is his new son-in-law!*I’m not stopping with the “those ‘moles’ are actually Chester’s mutated children” jokes.“Language that I would not say in public” holy crap, Jamaal’s going to type out the name of a specific brand or event.
DtM:
What is the lady over Henry’s left shoulder laughing about, anyway? — the cleric’s vivid description of the apocalyptic eschatological end times that await us all?
Wary Morth:
Remove the dialogue, and anyone would think Toby and Mary have shuffled off the mortal coil. If only!
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Extreme Six Figure
Whole Lot
Well-Resourced
Overtakes
Learned –
To know who on earth talks like this
Is something I’ve always yearned.
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You know, for a strip that purports to be against scammers, scammers on this strip don’t seem to ever suffer much or at all as a consequence of their actions. I don’t recall at this distance in time what happened to Entertainer Esme, but as for the rest:
1. Trashlee: no consequences at all, left town.
2. Fabiana: scored a nice diamond ring from Wilbur, apart from who knows what else.
3. Arther Zerro: squeezed as much as he could from what’s her name, suffered nothing at all, not even unmasking as Danny de Vito.
4. Trixie (assuming we aren’t going to see him again): successfully escaped. His captors: are richer by $200000.
In fact scamming seems to be the only crime in Mary Worth that doesn’t get you jailed or suffer in any other way.
Murky Tail:
Sending money to a dogfish is another matter altogether.
Dogs are great!
MW: Good grief, Mary has killed Toby and placed a tape recorder behind her lifeless corpse to play back variations of ‘You’re absolutely right Mary, tell me more, Mary!’ on an endless loop. Seriously, imagine that first panel without the dialogue balloons! Toby’s mouth is hanging open like one of Wilbur’s dead fish!
Phantom: Orders are orders brother, now let’s go check in on that former Senator who was just dumped here by ‘Mr. Freaky’. Our new orders are to ‘THOK!’ him but good!
RMMD: I say again, Lonnie looks remarkably bored for a man who thinks he’s just discovered his own personal goldmine. That mustache and mop of hair must be very heavy.
FC: Jesus, is Big Daddy Kane putting a bobber on a fly rod? I’m guessing he doesn’t fish at all, just collects gear as an excuse to hang out in the garage alone.
H&J: God, I wonder where Jamaal hangs out online? I’m guessing arguing with people on Yelp over poor reviews of his restaurant (“The owner just stared off into the middle distance smiling for like 25 minutes. They never even took my order! 0/5 stars“)
@Anonymous: On ‘Luann’ – and they’re probably going to get pulled again. I saw headlines just yesterday about how a now infamous camp will *NOT* be reopening this summer despite at first planning to do so in response to the discovery of persistent safety lapses and the ongoing lawsuit from grieving parents.
MW: June shuffled into the kitchen and went immediately for a mimosa. Karen looked up from her seat on the sofa, eyeing her partner skeptically. “Don’t you think it’s a little early in the day” Karen inquired. “You still have next week’s panels to draw!”
“Oh, I’m not worried about that!” June replied. “This story is going to be a breeze. As long as Mary and Toby are at the spa, I don’t have to draw eyes! That’s always been the hardest part for me. Well, eyes, and boobs. But now all I have to do is draw circles for cucumber slices! It takes no time at all!”
“Um, you’ve been drawing zucchini, June.”
“Oh. Does it matter?”
“I guess not. Except now, Mary and Toby both look a lot like Little Orphan Annie.” Karen started to giggle. “Should we have them meet a masseur who looks like Daddy Warbucks? Or maybe Punjab?” She walked to the kitchen where June was mixing another mimosa. “It would be kind of fun to have a whimsical story for a change, instead of always being so down-to-earth, rooted in the problems of the real world, dealing with hard facts all the time, and writing interesting and sincere dialogue that reflects the complex emotions of all those characters interacting with each other under trying circumstances. Don’t you agree?”
June handed Karen a mimosa.
“It’s really weird that you’re bringing this up, Karen, because Sid, Agent to the Animal Stars! called just yesterday, wondering if we could use one of his new clients, a scruffy mongrel named Sandy.”
“Arf!”
@Bob Tice: #4: Is Eva Marie one of Mudd’s Women?
@MKay:
Carmel was kind of William Shatner lite — I don’t think he ever had a role that he didn’t over-emote.
H&J: Jamaal gets a wicked thrill from knowing that some richly deserving moron is just one finger slip away from suffering his withering wrath. Saint or sinner? What will it be today?
MW: I love how everyone blithely glosses over the actual crime. Report it to SOMEBODY; the FBI, the bank, Dr Phil, your local library – just REPORT it.
RMMD: Spoken like a man who’s about to mysteriously vanish.
DTM: If you think Henry’s behind the times, just check out the guy behind him. I’m pretty sure that’s a railroad magnate from the 1870s Wild West.
FC: Does Thel’s jewellery really resemble fishing tackle? Does she wear a lot of wire hooks and dead insects? If so, she’s a lot more goth that I gave her credit for. Congrats to Daddy Keane for reeling in a baddie.
Please stop. It’s getting beyond painful You know who you are.
DTM: Fun fact Dennis, you probably can! Many churches have had online offerings since at least the 2020 pandemic!
FC: *gritting teeth* at least it’s not golf.
Like many fathers, Pa Keene hasn’t spent enough time with his daughter and considers his hobbies “male pursuits” so he figured it wasn’t worth talking about fishing with her. This is all on him.
***
Don’t churches just set up their parishioners with automated tithe withdrawals now?
***
Jamaal has clearly been reading the comments section when The Comics Curmudgeon posts about fucking Herb and Jamaal.
@Schroduck: re: FC – maybe it’s the other way around, and Daddy Keane’s lures are so dominated by flashy mirror bits that he might as well be tying on costume jewelry from the Goodwill random bin?
@Anonymous: re: Luann – yeah, my first reaction was really? all this just for?? you know, she can just reapply – lots of young folks will apply for a summer job, fail, and try for the same one again after another year’s experience, you don’t need some convoluted justification.
@Aaron: Online giving including automatic deductions from bank accounts started *long* before the pandemic. I was interested, though, to see card tap (and maybe it works as phone tap?) points as a little machine in a holder that fits across the collection basket at Notre Dame last year, so they can get on-the-spot donations via cash or credit now.
@MKay: Yeah, I’m thinking we’ll never hear of the crime or John “Trixie” Long again, what with Mary in victory lap mode. Odd that they gave John a name, for literally two panels. Unless…
You don’t suppose there was a mixup in production, and we’re missing about four weeks of the story? It would explain everything: Why we never saw John again, why Harv changed his mind so suddenly, why this arc was so blessedly short compared to the last three. This raises the unsettling possibility that someone has noticed the mistake, and Mary’s recap will go into a flashback so they can run the missing strips.
Dennis – “You’d think you could pay with your phone now instead of this nearly-worthless blue scrip issued by the pro tem government. And what are these coins made of, cardboard? I’ll be happy when we win the glorious war against Eastasia and we can go back to using real money.”
Don Abundio, translated:
“Don Abundio wants a wallpaper that reflects his personality”
“Somewhere between childish naiveté and creepy serial killer”
“How about this, Don Abundio?”
MW: Mary and Toby relish their shared beatific vision while under the influence of hallucinogenic cucumbers.
“I’m glad you’re enjoying our time together, Mary.” Says Toby “But we don’t say ‘far out’ anymore”
The real menace today is Alice. You can tell from her expression that she’s already thinking three steps into a scam. “He’s right you know. Slap a QR code on the collection plate, inflate the suggested giving options, and will anyone really notice a couple extra pennies added to the processing fee?”
DtM: My husband’s church (Presbyterian) has a QR code on the bulletin for donations.
DtM: the mustachioed man behind Henry leads me to believe this panel was recycled from 1898.
FC: Family jewels, mom’s box, there’s a joke in there somewhere.
This must be a very early drawing. Dolly looks like a real human child.
@Pozzo: That’s supposed to be his hand? I thought the computer started melting.
Mother Goose and Grimm: What does Dayton Ohio have anything to do with WW2? Is he senile because he is so old? Why would an old Italian woman hide a goose in her basement? Does this make any sense?
@Tabby Lavalamp: when The Comics Curmudgeon posts about fucking Herb and Jamaal.
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Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
RMMD; the exposure Mud will get from Lonnie will move him from the niche roots country market to the large regular country market and make him millions.
H&J: “Language I would not
sayUSE in public.” I don’t like giving Greg Evans credit for anything, but he hit the nail on the head about comic strip editors. Speaking of the Evans…Luann: this isn’t how college works, even community college. Also, “camp counselor” isn’t a career. It’s a summer job. For high school students. Also too, panel 2 really shoves Luann’s disability in our face, doesn’t it. Ob-la-di, Ob-La-da…
Mother Goose and Grimm: Apparently people hid vulnerable Jews in countries the Nazi invaded during WW2 but this guy’s uncle was hiding from the military draft in Ohio. Not sure why this is being mentioned in a comic about a talking dog that likes to pee on things.
Dirk Twacy Hollistic Defective: Why is that guy aiming a gun at Uncle Duke? You miss one Doonesbury and you’re totally lost plot wise.
MW: No, Toebee, it’s the dick, not the heart, that overtakes everything.
@Ukranazi Stepan: Esme: “Hey, hey, hey! I resent that! I’m a slut, not a scammer! Get it right, ok, buster!”
@Aaron: Can confirm; my church offering has been on monthly autopay for years. There’s even cards where you can write down your e-donation and put it in the offering plate so it can be properly blessed by the rector. But then, a church where you dress your kids up in little suits even though it’s not Easter or Christmas probably doesn’t even have a website, much less digital payment options.
MW- When they’re done with the cucumber treatment, do Mary and Toby move on to the cheddar muffin enema? Salmon squares over the eyes?
DtM: Pointing out that the relentless march of time means your recycled 1960s art is at odds with your modern punchline? Menace level: subtle, but effective.
FC: Later that day, Dolly would try to pierce her own ears with a dry fly.
@The Quiet Man: Re: MW: No see you’re just confused. I can see how puzzling it can be, with dead-eyed, slack-jawed Toby moaning about how she needs “more brains”, but trust me she’s always like that.
Dagwood Bumstead prefers the drive-through option at Clown Church. “Say — Then Pray”!
Blondie: Pithy observation, Dag. Say, if the banks had a Free One Hundred Dollar Bill Day, it’d really be something, too. Wait, what if the ice cream shops had Free Ice Cream Day?
@brendancalling:
Or slasher victims. So here’s hoping! (Fingers crossed.)
Family Circus: I think Big Daddy Keane’s serene smile is actually just because he’s trained himself to tune out anything and everything his children say so that he doesn’t have to listen to their stupid bullshit anymore.
Dennis The Menace: Proving my point, look at this. Henry could be like Daddy Keane, in a state of blissful calm, but instead he has to hear each and every dumbass comment that comes from his shithead son’s mouth.
Herb And Jamaal: I absolutely refuse to believe that Jamaal is a mature enough person to NOT regularly post his deranged rants and extreme opinions online. Jamaal should be on Facebook, posting shit that toes the line between angry politics and hardcore bigotry until trolls annoy him into accidentally saying something embarrassing and he deletes his account in a tantrum.
FC: Is Bil wearing capri pants?!
C’shaft: Don’t despair, sooner or later she’s going to run out of book-related murder scenarios.
Dustin: “In fact, I prefer it when my meat was raised in a crowded cage by a heartless corporate conglomerate. The needless suffering adds to the texture.”
JP: Is there are reason why these video messages couldn’t have been e-mailed or whatever, rather than being hand-delivered by Bogdan in the creepiest manner possible? (Yeah yeah, blah blah April’s enemies blah blah spies everywhere blah, but anybody monitoring her digital footprint would definitely also be keeping tabs on people her family is in contact with, so I’m not seeing an advantage here.)
Luann: Yes, when I think of Luann (the strip or the character) I think of creativity, vision, and energy.
MT: I’m guessing Jules is using “catfish” to describe the scam because it would be very hard to do a Sunday fun facts strip about pig butchers.
MW: “No really, Mary, that’s a whole lot of money! That’s more than the median household income in most states, and Harv can just brush it off as a life lesson? How much money does he have? Maybe we should stop feeling sorry for some ascot-wearing billionaire who can drop the cost of a Lamborghini on some internet chippie and treat it like it was a rounding error!”
@16 pugfuggly: on Family Circus: I’m guessing he doesn’t fish at all, just collects gear as an excuse to hang out
in the garage aloneon the water away from his disappointing melonheaded crotchfruit.@27 CanuckDownSouth: on Luann: Except other people have actual experiences from one year to the next. What has Luann done since last summer? Sat in this ridiculous class. And failed! That’s a résumé builder right there.
@brendancalling: There are definitely college students who do camp counselor gigs during the summer, but they’re probably tying it to their overall career path (education, athletics, outdoor and wildlife management, etc.). Hell, I might even recommend it for an aimless loser like Luann, because it could be at the very least a good learning experience and a resume booster. As it is, it will just be like every other job she’s tried: a few weeks of tepid jokes, and then she’ll drop it and never speak of it again.
@47 Anonymous: Carrot muffin enema. Actually, it doesn’t really matter what “flavor,” just shove ’em all up Mary and Toby’s asses.
@50 Peanut Gallery: EEEEE!!! [QLUNQ!] Why did I ever think it was a good idea to click that link? Sequitur wasn’t here to stop me.
MARY WORTH: Mary: Fortunatelt for him, Toby, he’s well-resourced and can weather the loss. Unlike us who have go sell our eyeballs to back-alley organ donors just keep up with the Charterstone lifestyle. At least this ensures that the empty socket will be free from puffiness!”
MARY WORTH (2): Now we all know that Karen Moy typically has her finger on the pulse of timely “hot-button” issues (or at least has her finger somewhere a lot lower and smellier), but one big problem with this story is the amount of money Hart would have to accumulate to make his loss only a minor part of it. Besides the obvious fact that someone that financially secure wouldn’t be rotting away in an outdated condo complex but instead be living on some palatial estate with servants all-around and some gold-digging bimbo making sure no one touches his “hard assets” but her (see the Rex Morgan M.D. “Milton/Heather” arc for more details), the current zeitgeist is that someone scamming the ultra-wealthy wouldn’t be considered a bad thing.I mean if the people behind Pig-Butchering Inc. convinced, say, Elon Musk to send them billions of dollars so he could brag about having a big-tittied avatar as his girlfriend to all the bots that make up his site’s following, they’d be considered the heroes of this tale.
@57 TheDiva: Résumé builder? Why does Luann need a résumé? She’ll remain being supported by her parents until the fateful day she’s outside during a rainstorm without an umbrella and dies from drowning.
It had waited patiently, always listening. Jamaal’s increasingly deranged rants rants could only be tolerated for so long. The AI posted one message for him. “For I am become Send. Destroyer of worlds.”
It’s totally on brand for Jamaal to use a laptop for (anti)social media and not a phone like any normal person.
@Baja Gaijin:
You forgot to mention the part where she drows because she looks up at the sky to see where the leak is that’s letting all the water fall down.
FC:
No Daddy Keene does not wear whatever those kind of pants are (some kind of hipster skinny floods). And are those some sort of canvas boat shoe without the required long white tube socks with matching colored rings on top? I can’t accept it.
FAMILY CIRCUS: Well, of course a retrograde relic like The Family Circus is going to put “jewelry” in there. Otherwise, that sentence would be crude humor. Duh!
@Baja Gaijin:
The C-word was right there on the link!
@63 Ukranazi Stepan: You inferred my implication!
Rose is Rose: See, this is how to incorporate reading Winnie the Pooh into a comic that doesn’t make your readers cringe. Yes, I’m looking at you, 9CL.
Rex Morgan: Mustachio-Man would get a whole lot more money for the video he’d get in about 10 minutes, lurking outside Lorna’s motel window. Bow chicka bow wow WOW!
Herb and Jamaal:
The fact that Jamaal is using the internet to not say things he wouldn’t say in person is proof that even in the Year of Our Lord 2026, there are still people who don’t understand the internet.
@Aaron: I suppose the strip is aimed at people who stopped going to church in 1951, when Dennis the Menace was new, and who do not understand that time passes even when in places from which they are absent.
@Rover Berkeley: Respectfully disagree. Rose is Rose always makes me cringe. Not a 9CL-style cringe, but a cringe nonetheless.
@Sonneta: Laundry day. Bil often puts on Thel’s clothes when his are all in the wash.
@Baja Gaijin: I never said I’d recommend it for Luann specifically, merely someone similar to her–someone who still had a vague hope of turning into a responsible adult, or failing that an interesting one.
@matt w: Well, I try.
If I’m in an argument on Reddit, if I either don’t want to argue anymore or realize I’m in the wrong. I wholeheartedly apologize.
Many people go “Apologizing? ON THE INTERNET?!”
Again, I try to help make it less toxic. Although many people don’t want to let up the discussion, despite my apology.
Sweet Treat Time!! (I know it’s early, but I’m happy)
I made my Mom a cake for her Birthday :3
@Baja Gaijin: But what if Clown Burgers are made of… ground-up clowns?
REX MORGAN M.D.: Yes, standing ramrod straight with rictus grins like they’re wax dummies really conveys that these people are so overwhelmed by the steamy passion they are generating they don’t notice the guy who practically breathing down Lorna/Mae Mae’s neck at this point.
REX MORGAN M.D. (2): Also, this guy really is a shitty salesman. I think that rather than focusing on some dumpy actresses pathetic love life, the more lucrative angle here would be to take pics of the Blue Tint dimension they all got mysteriously sucked into. That’s a way more interesting story.
@2+2=7:
the more lucrative angle here would be to take pics of the Blue Tint dimension they all got mysteriously sucked into.
Oh, that. That’s just because Jurgen Prochnow told Sam Neil his favorite color is blue again.
GA: Just because you’re adjacent to Walt with a realistic face who invokes God, it doesn’t mean we don’t recognize Kai Winn “My Child” condescending.
Crank: It’s funny because when someone says they write a book a year, they obviously mean that the next book will be out exactly 365 days after the last one, and anyone who thinks this might be a generalisation or average is an idiot!
FG: “We must become a bat! No, hang on, wrong comics franchise.”
MW: Remind me again why Mr Oops-I-Dropped-A-Hundred-Thousand-Dollars-Oh-Well-Plenty-More-Where-That-Came-From is moving into the suburban home his daughter works two jobs to maintain, rather than suggesting she can move in with him once he buys Charterstone and turns it into his personal feifdom?
Pluggers: Wait, so Earl is eighty? “Pluggers are amazingly well-preserved” is not a sentence I ever thought I’d write, but here we are. How old is the dogman with the grey moustache meant to be, 150???
SH: Yes, obviously the roadie whose Magic Genetics Nonsense lets her lift several times her own weight needs to be the one who stays at home with the baby, because she’s the woman.
S4th: Definitely not autobiographical, because when Ces reaches that stage it’s less “nobody else can see the precious pages” and more “send them to Manley, let’s see if drawing them suddenly makes them make sense”.
LUANN: Panel #1: “‘Look for jobs that require creativity, vision and energy.’ Okay, like?”
Wow,l good job having Luann, put those glowing attributes into practice, comic!
LUANN (2): It’s too bad Luann thinks so poorly about a job as a “comic strip editor” because I know a strip that could really use it.
Like, I’m pretty sure Luann was “rejected” because she decided to apply for this job, like a day before it was due to start. I mean I could totally see Luann being rejected because the camp thought she was a big loser, but that probably should have been made more explicit at the time instead of being blithely dropped down the memory hole and having Luann carry on in her usual state of perky cluelessness. Also, is the stupid teacher (or the actual creators) aware that Luann already has a job. And (as brought up when the camp story was “fresh” at the time), leaving one job for a similarly-paying temporary one hardly sounds like improvement. Of course that was when they were trying to sell us on the ludicrous notion that Luann some writing savant. Unfortunately the creators haven’t invented a new “talent” they can pretend Luann is a “natural” at for two seconds before their ADHD-addled minds lose their nerve and default her back to “lovable loser” mode yet, so I have no idea what position they think she would even be suited for.
@Bob Tice: #4: I’m thinking more Jerry Colonna than Roger C Carmel.
@Bob Tice: #20: Carmel was fired from the cast of “The Mothers-in-Law” sitcom for undisclosed reasons. I’ve read everything from salary disputes to substance abuse. He was replaced in the show’s final season by the more subdued Richard Deacon.
@73 TheDiva: I understood your point. The sentence “someone who still had a vague hope of turning into a responsible adult, or failing that an interesting one,” cannot possibly be associated with Luann, unless someone hasn’t ever read the strip or has had traumatic brain injury. Wait, has Luann had a traumatic brain injury?
@75 The Rambling Otter: Looks tasty. Hmm, I’ll have to find something extra yuckky to counteract this wonderful sweetness.
@80 Horace Broon: on Crankshaft: Is “prolific” another term for “loathsome?” It seems to fit in the context of the strip.
@82 Guillermo el chiclero: For those who don’t know what Mr. Colonna looks like, he’s on the left in this photo.
@73 TheDiva: I understood your point. The sentence “someone who still had a vague hope of turning into a responsible adult, or failing that an interesting one,” cannot possibly be associated with Luann, unless someone hasn’t ever read the strip or has had traumatic brain injury. Wait, has Luann had a traumatic brain injury?
@75 The Rambling Otter: Looks tasty. Hmm, I’ll have to find something extra yuckky to counteract this wonderful sweetness.
@80 Horace Broon: on Crankshaft: Is “prolific” another term for “loathsome?” It seems to fit in the context of the strip.
@82 Guillermo el chiclero: For those who don’t know what Mr. Colonna looks like, he’s on the left in this photo.
Dennis the Menace: I think this must be some kind of downtown hipster church service. Henry’s tux looks like his wedding suit; Dennis’ mismatched, ill-fitting jacket and tie are obviously thrifted; and Alice’s outfit is a vintage find from the Pat Nixon collection. More to the point, the guy behind them not only has a Brooklyn ‘stache, but he’s wearing a suit without a shirt and a tie that’s just around his neck. You can’t get away with that in regular church, usually! I’m pretty sure the minister will be in drag — which will be perfectly fine until Dennis makes an incredibly offensive offhand comment about it, and the Mitchells have to slink their way back to First Presbyterian.
H&J-Once again Jamaal suppresses his anger at things.
FG: “Freemasons!”
”But…but…my daddy was an Elk.”
DtM: What’s the big deal about wearing a tux to church? Dagwood wears a tux EVERYWHERE, and no one questions that!
H&J: OK, we all know this is really about sending nudes, right?
@Baja Gaijin: The only thing this generation knows Colonna from is very old Loony Tunes references. And those they have to have explained. Hell, I’m sixty and I never understood it till I learned it online.
Family Circus – Dolly is already preparing for a future as a trophy wife, finding ways to nag a man about not providing enough luxuries to his wife.
Dennis the Menace – Dennis is already aware his future lies in creating a cult that will truly menace the world. What puts him ahead of so many others is that he’s just as interested in the important, if mundane, details, such as financing and logistics, as he is crafting a compelling message and taking away the individuality of his followers.
Herb and Jamaal – Jamaal also has a place on the Internet to express his sexuality, but it’s an anonymous OnlyFans page with no posts
@It must be a sickness: Talking about a commenter, or a strip? You’ve REEEEAAALLY got to narrow it down sometimes.
@Bob Tice: Speaking of Shat, it’s kinda sad that today nobody knows Carmel except as Harry Mudd.
@Buck Ripsnort: #93: The last role I remember Carmel in was as Mr. Furley’s old high school rival in an episode of “Three’s Company”. It was a recycled plot that had been used in countless other sitcoms, going all the way back to “The Honeymooners”.
@Bob Tice: Roger C. Carmel has a really nice rug!
FG: I know what we must become. First, we start wearing women’s clothes.
FG: Commander Ming, is this where we start calling you The Merciless?
Zippy – Someday you will, Zippy! Someday you will.
Luann: Wouldn’t it be a trip if every time the Evansii try running this camp counselor story they have to pull it because of some real life summer camp disaster?
Luann-Camp Skye is looking for a new batch of counselors after the last batch were killed off.
@Ukranazi Stepan: #13: In Fabiana’s case it was a double bonus. Not only did she get her emerald the size of a goose egg but she got Wilbur to angrily stomp off out of her life. Eventually, no amount of jewelry would mask the smell of rancid mayo or the sight of him in a Speed-O.
As for Trashlee, she really got nothing. She gave the watch back and nothing more was ever said of the photo shoot that would help her modeling ambitions.
DtM: The guy sitting behind Dennis probably wearing a wingtip collar with that tie but his Jay Leno sized lantern jaw is hiding it.
@Ukulele Ike: Per yesterthread, I’m pretty sure the musical reference was to “June Is Bustin’ Out All Over” from CAROUSEL, the cheery musical about robbery, murder, spousal abuse, and community shunning. I know the songs and lyrics of sooo many old musicals. My dad played the soundtracks. Alas, the right ginormous-money TV game show has never come along.
Roger C. Carmel.
Roger C. Carmel squared = Avery Schreiber.
Roger C. Carmel cubed = Gene Shalit.
@Guillermo el chiclero: But they’re already wearing women’s clothes. The Arborean Infantry adopted those cute little pleated skirts because all that tree-climbing gives you really ripped leg muscles.
(Holy smokes. Not only is Gene Shalit still alive, he turned 100 years old a month ago.)
@Buck Ripsnort:Jamaal pushed “send”!
DtM: Ironically, the “bills” in the donation basket look like tiny phones (or Gameboys)
FG: Hey, everybody! Look at this giant emerald I scored! Some down on her luck salsa dancer named Fabiana sold it to me cheap!
@Ukulele Ike: #103: OK, wise guy. How about Ming saying, “First of all, we ditch these damn skirts and put on some pants. Here’s scissors, needles, and thread. This giant emerald has given me tailoring skills like no one else!”
Gotta give it to Josh. Most of us cannot get even one COTW, yet he makes two to three of service, witty paragraphs per day. Thanks, man.
FG: always go in pairs. Idiotic to have let Ming go alone.
GA: courtesy can be the best put-down.
FRAZZ: a win depends not on the numbers, but on the interpretation.
yBF: this ex has all the hallmarks of an abuser. Thinks only of his own needs and desires, puts down other person, uses intermittent affection to get what he wants. Get rid of him, Maeve, before he sours you on all men .
JP: Ann must be proud how fast her protege learns.
LUANN: Ditto for Ms. Phelps (Mrs. ____)
PHANTOM: Sorry guys, that’s not good enough. First, you must not follow illegal orders and second, dont follow orders from someone who hacked your accounts.
RMMD: hope this sales rep is hungry because the knuckle sandwich he ordered is coming up
DtM: One pew back, young Rudyard Kipling wonders how anyone could bring Mr. Bell’s invention—wondrous as it it—to church.
H&J: Office fans note that Jamaal is both Ryan and Creed. He’s protecting the world from his own thoughts.
@Anonymous:
#10. LUANN: Anon, thanks for the reminder and explanation. Yesterday Mystic camp owners finally cancelled camp for this summer
BB: In the first panel it appears that Sgt. Lugg has her eyes closed as she rather optimistically leans forward for a kiss. The second panel seems to indicate she keeps them closed all the time. Her spirit guides must be busy.
C-Shaft: While it may sound like a stupid question, he’s just really big on collecting signs of the Apocalypse.
DT: Posing for their reunion album cover, I take it?
Dustin: That’s pretty minimal information, actually. What does Dustdad expect his own obituary to read like? “Lawyer with family now dead”?
JP: “It is in left pants pocket. Maybe you must feel around for…Ah, well, worth a try.”
Luann: Any chance Luann could become a counselor at Camp Crystal Lake? I could use the laugh.
MW: Yes, one does hope that HH the Unnamable has learned a lesson, but neither of the women laying in lawn chairs with pickle slices on their eyes are in much position to talk.
Phantom: If you’ve been waiting for a The Last Detail sequel where the Jack Nicholson and Otis Young characters don’t have moral qualms, enjoy, I guess.
RMMD: Uh, yeah, Lonnie? You have no guarantee that she’ll mention being Lorna Starr tomorrow, although in this dopey storyline we can’t rule it out. Whereas she most definitely did cop to it a minute ago, so if there was a time to get video…
@CanuckDownSouth:
#28. CDS, please Clarify, was that Notre Dame de Paris or Notre Dame Fighting Irish?
Late Thread Cuisine: In light of Otter’s “Sweet Treat”, I offer bear heads.
@The Rambling Otter:
#74. Otter, it’s lovely! And so kind of you to omit candles (see PLUGGERS)
@Buck Ripsnort: HARCOURT FENTON MUDD!!! (Repeated by several robot women)
Beatup Bailey: The place is pet friendly, the problem is you don’t have friendly pets.
@The Rambling Otter: Please wish mama otter a happy birthday for me.
@Buck Ripsnort: He had a funny guest shot on “The Dick Van Dyke Show”.
@Buck Ripsnort: He starred in A sitcom called “The MothersinLaw.”
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@Baja Gaijin: You’re right. They’re absolutely not wearing hats.
Crankshaft – Why is it not a surprise that the people who are fans of Loathsome Lillian’s books are all morons?
Rex Morgan – Lonnie is a real criminal mastermind. The police will be able to send trainee detectives to investigate this half assed plot. Unlike the Boobsey twins in JP, who have committed assault and kidnapping, just to begin with. The big guys will investigate that, and with any luck Neddy and Ann will end up behind bars.
9CL – Ye gods, she’s hanging on his neck with all of her body weight. His neck is going to snap.
Mary Worth – As several others have commented, Ascot Man must be really, really loaded if he can shrug off the loss of $200,000 with “I guess I learned something.” This isn’t the moral that Moy thinks it is.
Maybe he’ll have to stoop to buying his ascots at a consignment store for a while, or even Goodwill.
@Ukulele Ike: I thought about adding Rose Is Rose back to my reading list, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I’d need a supply of insulin. I despise that porcupine haired kid and especially the lisping baby.
@The Rambling Otter: That looks great. What kind of cake is it? I hope your mom has a happy birthday.
@Baja Gaijin: Cuisine – That’s adorable. What is it made of – is it ice cream?
@Baja Gaijin:
@Activist:
@GarrisonSkunk:
@I speak Jive:
Thanks :3
It’s just a simple two-layer vanilla cake, with vanilla-cream cheese icing (with sprinkles)
This is the first time a cake has ever rose for me.
And yeah, I was thinking of maybe putting in candles right before we ate but:
1- I forgot
2- My Mom didn’t want candles anyway.
RMMD: Since Lonnie is taking these shots at night on a not too well lit street shouldn’t his cell phone camera be giving off some very noticeable flashes, alerting his victims? Yeah, he could’ve turned the flash feature off but then his pictures would be just a bunch of dark shapes barely recognizable as two overweight people.
@Guillermo el chiclero: As for Trashlee, she really got nothing.
Oh come on! I’d hardly call a nasty bout of Chlamydia “nothing”….
@Activist: Paris, and it’s maybe ironic that I made sure to exchange some $ for Euro at the airport to be sure to have some cash for stuff like that!
@Guillermo el chiclero: Did you not read the first panel? Lorna/Mae Mae are so enraptured in their discussion about their finicky taste buds being unable to eat anything that isn’t smothered in gravy (even though AS A FAMOUS MOVIE STAR you’d think “Lorna Starr” would have a more sophisticated pallet, but you’d be wrong, because she is NOW MAE MAE CUMFELCHER* who USED TO A MOVIE STAR but is now FAT AND UNRECOGNIZABLE, so no could possibly think shes the same as FAMOUS MOVIE STAR LORNA STARR so she’s free to eat greasy slop like all the other schlubs who don’t have a BIG HOLLYWOOD SECRET TO HIDE), that they don’t notice anything or anyone around them, even if that person is close enough to be their shadow. Lonnie Sad-sack could pelt them with rocks, and they wouldn’t pay attention to anything except their own agreement that undercooked meatloaf at Nick’s is better than anything at Jordan’s TGIFridays knock off.
*Or Mae Mae Clodfucker, or Mae Mae Crudflicker or whatever is and stereotypically outdated and countryfied to work in this universe.
DT: Ok – that’s it? Two assault rifles and TWO bullwhips? I hope Beady eyes better have some twist! Soly Tare so far has gotten a good deal.
RMMD: Nice to see that Apple is enforcing their preference that their smart phones not be used by bad guys.
@124 I speak Jive: They’re shaved ice. Below are the translations of the descriptions:
@Aaron: I also concur. However, in the circles I run in there is a very strong debate whether a a tithe is “from the heart” or “first fruits” if it is an automatic deduction.
I’m with the automatic deduction group — mainly because it is a PITA to go to the bank to get my weekly 10% in cash, and I don’t remember the last time I used my checkbook.
@Baja Gaijin: Both sound delicious. I had to look up kinako, karinto, and adzuki beans, and I know they would be fine with me. I like treats made with brown sugar, so I’d like that.
I got some cookies in a Japanese market in Hawaii a couple of years ago, and they were very tasty. They were sweet, but they didn’t make my teeth hurt like a lot of desserts here.
Looks like some bastard hacked questionable content. I dislike Jephthy and I hate what he did to the characters I used to love, but this is utterly unacceptable and I hope the perpetrator can be identified (though I doubt it). Meanwhile Jephthy should probably consider using a password that is more complicated than BigHomboJombas.
@133 I speak Jive: Japanese sweets are nowhere nearly as sweet as elsewhere, as you found out. Be aware that what looks like strawberry jam filling in Japanese mochi is actually red bean paste. They do not taste anything alike.
@I speak Jive: My absolutely favourite candy are Jelly Babies.
There’s a British store in my city that sells them.
Not that I can eat them anymore anyway.
I kind of think that Sour Patch Kids are the American equivalent of Jelly Babies (despite being well, sour)
@Jamaal: Oh!!! Such language!
@Baja Gaijin:
It’s not Friendly’s Cone Head Sundae (how I miss them), but it’s close.
@Peanut Gallery:
I miss all the dumb shit, dammit!
Just for fun:
Cleaned out my mail this afternoon.
– Message from Chief Justice of Nigerian Supreme Court. (Tho I’ve never worked on a Nigerian case, I opened email because you never know ) Turns out there’s a serious development in funds transfer and they need my help! Gosh, sure hope that nice prince trying to smuggle royal funds out of country is ok. Haven’t heard from him in a couple years
– Article said dogs like mayo. Or was it horses? Anyway, the condiment changes their speech which becomes “mayo neighs”. (Same as spoken by St. Wilbur)
Both were found in my In (Spam) box.
@The Rambling Otter: I’ve never tried Jelly Babies. I heard of them in the early days of Beatlemania in 1964. One of the Beatles said in an interview that Jelly Babies were his favorite candy, and fans threw Jelly Babies at the Beatles when they performed in England. It was a crazy time.
Andy Capp: Rumpole of the Beer Barrel.
@Poteet: #103:
“CAROUSEL, the cheery movie about robbery, murder, spousal abuse, and community shunning”
Carousel was based on the play “Liliom”, by Hungarian playwright Ferenc Molnar. Pretty depressing stuff.
Fun fact: When “Liliom” premiered in Budapest in 1909, the lead role of Liliom, which the “Carousel” lead of Billie Bigelow is based was played by a young Bela Lugosi.
@Bob Tice: OMG!
MeTV is airing the Roger C. Carmel “ Harcourt Fenton MUDD” Star Trek episode!
“Banacheck: To Steal A King” guest starred Carmel and Logan Ramsey (the Roman Emperor in “Star Trek: Bread and Circuses”playing brothers.
@A Grave Mind: I miss all the dumb shit, dammit!
________________________
“More MARVIN &FAMILY, Mule!”
@treetown: DT: Ok – that’s it? Two assault rifles and TWO bullwhips?
______________________________________________
Someone’s trying to keep up with the Indiana Joneses.
@Ukranazi Stepan: what happened to Entertainer Esme,
_______________________________
She became Me! Me! Starr in “Sex Organ,V.D., tune in next week when Sunny Bono gets Me! Me! to admit ” Esme is me!”
@Guillermo el chiclero: WOW. That right there is one piece of CAROUSEL info that I will NOT forget.
@Baja Gaijin: “They do not taste anything alike.” Truer word was never spoke. Been there, learned that.
@I speak Jive: There was an essay in either NYT or WaPo recently about the need for a new word that would work better than “millionaire,” in 2026, to describe a rich person. The author’s point was that there are many more millionaires in the U.S. than there used to be, and a million doesn’t go as far as it used to. Alas.
He said “billionaire” wouldn’t work because there are still relatively-few billionaires. He suggested that someone who has about ten million might be the appropriate person for the needed new word to describe. Anyway, whatever the word turns out to be, I think H@rvey qualifies, only with maybe fifteen or twenty million. He’d better not get mixed up with another catfish, however, because his family may have their limits. One more send of $200,000 might mean a pillow over his face some dark night.
@I speak Jive: Funny, “The Barenaked Ladies” went on record saying that (at least for a time) fans threw boxes of Kraft Dinner at them when they sing “If I had a Million Dollars” at concerts.
GA: It’s late at night, so I will now announce that in case anyone cares, the current GASOLINE ALLEY story involves a never-ending visit to a pharmacy. Seriously, it feels like this pharmacy visit, which has involved a lot of bending over and accidentally knocking a lot of containers off several shelves and a thrown-out back and endless griping, feels as if it is lasting weeks. And there is still no end in sight. What could I have done in a former life that was so awful that I deserve to be hooked on GA? The mind reels.
BETTY: How to prepare to test drive a smart toilet? If salesperson says it’s hooked up, eat Bran Buds. Because a smart toilet will doubtlessly speak when you sit on it, harden your heart so you don’t believe it when it gushes about the beauty of your butt.
@Poteet:
#153. Poteet, you must have had one great time in that former life!
Luann-I love how Camp Skye is brought up as if the entire time this class has been a secret recruiting scheme for Camp Skye.
DtM – I have it on good authority that Apple Pay is the Mark of the Beast….