tzzzzz FARRRRRSH! AAAAHH– !!
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Dick Tracy, 8/30/26
I had kind of lost interest in this Dick Tracy computer hacker storyline, mostly because both the ways in which it got computer stuff right and the ways in which it got it wrong were fundamentally boring. But today? When one of Widescreen’s gang members tries to quit and demands to get what he’s owed, and Widescreen gives him a USB drive shaped like the Space Shuttle, which I guess we’re supposed to understand the implication is that it has crypto on it or something, so the henchman goes online via a coffee shop’s public Wi-Fi network and plugs that USB drive into his laptop like any savvy hacker would, and then the laptop explodes in such a way that henchman himself is immediately engulfed in flames and dies in agony? Well, that’s extremely not how computers work, but it’s also pretty exciting, so I’ll allow it.
Mother Goose and Grimm, 8/30/26
So, yes, Grimm’s liminal position between human and animal is extremely discomfiting to think about. But on the other hand, it allows him to talk to cars and know their True Names, so who’s to say if it’s good or bad?
Mary Worth, 8/30/26
Extremely sinister that the inspirational quote about self-respect and being a role model in today’s strip comes from notorious steroid abuser Barry Bonds. Are we meant to understand that Mary is, in some way, juicing? Is she using performance-enhancing drugs to improve her level of meddle? Truly disturbing.
23 replies to “tzzzzz FARRRRRSH! AAAAHH– !!”
Mary Worth Mashup: This is what really happened in The Bum Boat.
DT Expendable Henchman was sufficiently suspicious to question just what was on the drive, but not enough to refuse the offer of the “burner” laptop a couple of days ago. Which leads to the question about whether the writers think you can make a program that turns any computer into a bomb, or whether Widescreen was relying on Henchman making this request and then using a device that somehow can still emulate a desktop while the whole thing including the fireworks-starting screen is built of explosives.
Mary Worth:
“Don’t you know that I danced/I danced ’til a quarter to three/With the help, last night, of Tommy B.”
— Gary “U.S.” Bonds
Mary Worth:
“I gave you that gift, dear, because you remind me of the sea!”
“Because I’m so restless and unconquered?”
“No, because you’re all wet, and you make me sick to my stomach!”
Is Foxtrot the first comic to make a cyclosporiasis joke?
Haha relentless diarrhea ;)
Dr. Jeff – you can give Mary those puppy dog eyes in panel two, and awkwardly eat the seafood platter with your left hand in panel three, but we all know you ain’t spending the night with Mary. No amount of groveling and flattery is gonna change that.
MW: “You were right again, Mary. Her transformation from shrinking violet to confidant twenty something is amazing.” Says Doctor Jeff. “Even a loser like Dawn can benefit from PEDs.”
Mary Worth:
How exactly does Mary make this guy a “better man”? They go out once every two months or so to the very same restaurant, and then they spend the bulk of their time there talking about other people.
Mother Goose-“This annoying ventriloquist dummy that I have to take fishing now.”
MW-And how has Mary made Jeff better? This is the only time we see him.
RMMD-Just ship them off to ‘Mary Worth’.
Mother Goose and Grimm:
“Who’s Rusty?”
“He’s the longtime kid from Mark Trail. But with the current artist, he looks like a cross between Marine Boy and Chucky from ‘Child’s Play’ !”
So “NooBGone.exe” didn’t give you a clue, Nooby?
I remember reading Uhnak’s first book, the autobiographical “Policewoman”, sometime in the mid 1980s. It ended with her waiting to find out if she were about to be fired from the police department. I had no idea that she actually was either fired or forced out, or that she went on to become an author. In fact I had forgotten her name until I saw the Dick Tracy post here today.
Mother Goose and Grimm: Oh my god!! What happened to the artwork in panel 2??
Not that the art was that great before, but it really took a nose-dive. The art looks especially juvenile and Mother Goose looks like she’s melting.
Did Mike Peters simply forget how to draw his characters? (Can that even happen?) did he have a stroke?
Wrecks Moregone:
“The Mirakle Method? We’d prefer prison!”
Mary Worth:
“From whom did you purchase that beautiful abalone pen, anyway, Jeff?”
“An itinerant vendor on the beach who’s originally from the city of Victoria, on Mahe Island.”
“You mean — ?”
“Yep. She sells Seychelles sea shells by the seashore.”
“You made me a better man, Mary! I was a doctor devoted to my profession, I even volunteered in a Third World Country. But you came to me and told me to stop with this nonsense and return home to overprescribe pills and cheat Medicare! These days I only care about my very polluting muscle car and gigantic boat! You made me who I am today!”
Mary Worth:
“Wow. I’m in the ‘Mary Worth’ Sunday Quote Box. But I’m not going to get a big head about it or anything.”
— Barry Bonds
MG&G: Grimm can drive?! But he’s like… 3 feet tall. How does he reach the pedals?
The barista in Dick Tracy: “Oh my God a man is on FIRE!”
Customer: Finally gets a chance to stare directly at the barista’s rack.
Pluggers: Suggesting that it’s good for 90+ year old people to be left outside when the temperatures are are 90° sounds like a conspiracy to kill off a lot of seniors and you know the kind of people who are taking advice from Pluggers are highly suggestible and will absolutely try this.
DT: Not as brutal as “man in gimp suit gets eaten alive by rats” but still pretty good.
@The Rambling Otter:
Mike Peters is 82 years old and it’s kind of amazing he hasn’t completely lost his mind after drawing this comic for over 40 years.
@Sonneta: Many Dwarves are able to drive. I’m not exactly sure how though.