Soapy Tuesday
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Gil Thorp, 10/1/24
Ah, well, it seems that Gil’s airborne lovefest under old artist Rod Whigham was some kind of hallucination he was having during a massive cardiac event on the sideline of a football game, and now, under new artist Rachel Merrill, he lingers comatose in a hospital, kept alive by machines the size of a 1950s mainframe computer. Anyway, this is a perfect time for Keri to confess to bulimia, I guess, and just like the time in Mary Worth when Dr. Jeff’s drippy daughter accepted her cop boyfriend’s proposal when he was in a coma, this will only lead to positive outcomes.
Gasoline Alley, 10/1/24
Gasoline Alley will never try to confuse us with abrupt narrative shifts. In fact, if characters who we last saw a year and a half ago appear in the strip, Gasoline Alley will remind you what their names are by having another character say them out loud, in bold type! Gasoline Alley is just thoughtful like that, and as a rapidly aging member of its audience, I appreciate it.
Mary Worth, 10/1/24
Sorry, Estelle, I know your mind is clouded with sorrow right now, but you had both these pets for some time before you met Ed, so he can’t possibly have achieved “daddy” status with them. Technically Wilbur owned Pierre before he handed him off to you because of their complete failure to bond emotionally, so to Pierre Wilbur is daddy! Frankly this just seems to be pointing towards a reunion wiOH NO OH NO OH NO ABORT ABORT ABORT
101 replies to “Soapy Tuesday”
Six Chix: What are they dreaming about? The sandwich they’re holding, they’re imagining fucking an enlarged version of the sandwich. Duh.
Mary Worth Mashup
Rex Morgan Mashup
MW: And with a whiff of sulfur, the Devil appears.
Aw, for a minute I thought the new artist may or may not have been named Keri.
Meanwhile, the cosmic horror that surrounds the Worthiverse has inspired Wilbur, in his Buffalo Bill bathrobe, to start suddenly dancing around his apartment, cooking breakfast theatrically while this non-diagetically plays: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNC0kIzM1Fo
And a small, quiet, dark, raspy voice rings out: “soooooooooon”
Bonus points for Ed simply letting a beloved Pekingese die at the hands of a lethal injection rather than fixing her and running after Estelle, only to show up to her doorstep with flowers and an apology card to run into Wilbur relaxedly letting himself out of her apartment with the same sloppy grin on his face Commandant Lassard had during that speech at the lectern in “Police Academy”.
GA: Does that can say “Mice-A-Roni?” Biggest laugh this strip has given me in…well, ever.
CS: “…Hey, Ed. You still got that flamethrower?”
MW: Karen and June aren’t even pretending to try anymore.
JP: “Aiden Declandad Whelan! Were you embezzling with your brother again, young man?”
“Mo-o-o-om! I told you not to call me that! My name is Aidan!”
RMMD: Tomorrow’s marquee at Lou’s Nite Spot: “Live! One night only!
Truck TylerShorty and Beanpole!”Is this a feline retelling of the nativity story?
MW – That’s it, Estelle. Sit down with pint of chocolate Cathy ice cream. It won’t make you feel better, but for those few minutes you can forget about your ex-fiancé’s misplaced priorities. Chocolate Cathy Ice Cream – we’re here when you need us.
Is Mary Worth baking a tray of skulls?
GT Glad to see that this new artist has taken in the essential theme of the Gil Thorp style: keep everything as opaque and dense as possible. Where are those two in the final panel? At the foot of the same bed? At the same time? Eh, what does it matter, time and space are an illusion…
GA Three wise women bearing gifts? Rejoice, Kitty Jesus is born!
MW Mary’s meddle-sense is off the charts this morning. She hasn’t quite triangulated the signal yet, so she’s baking dozens upon dozens of muffins in preparation.
Dr Ed dodged a bulle….wait, make that dodged a 205mm shell! Dodged an FAB 500 glide bomb! Don’t let Mary Worth meddle you back to Eshtelle, Dr Ed!
Didn’t we learn our lesson about bat pâté in 2020?
MW: I like how Estelle is crying desperately, but Libby and Pierre do not seem to care at all! Most relatable characters!
JP: Remember a few weeks ago when I was confusing Declan’s parents with Sophie’s date’s parents? Declan’s parents are just as confused.
@johnny lt, GA: If so, we should see a crossover with Mark Trail and Victoria Vex looking to get rid of all newly-born kittens, lest they take over the Sunny Soleil Society.
Marvin: A dark message today, ‘No amount of soap can clean the product of Jenny’s befouled womb.’ but it’s something we’ve all suspected.
@Dan: For a minute, I thought Gil Thorp had gotten mashed up with Mara Llave, Keeper of Time, and you know what? I was okay with that.
The message of Mary Worth is the same yesterday, today and forever: Put down your Häagen-Dazs, ladies, meddlin’ muffins are far superior when you’re on the rebound! Also, some man, any man, is better than none. We said, Put down the Häagen-Dazs!
GA: Can’t wait til these geniuses name the kittens. Mew, Mew-mew, Mew-too; the creative possibilities are ENDLESS. (no, I can’t let this go)
MW: Estelle is beyond muffins; the fateful words, “Will you marry me?” flipped an internal switch and turned her into The Incredible Sulk. Nail her apartment door shut and run.
9CL: Just put Edda on a street corner wearing a sandwich board that says, “Tell Me How Good I Look.” And leave her there forever.
GT: If Gil doesn’t make it, don’t let Keri speak at the wake.
DT: So much for that other bad guy we saw one time and learned virtually nothing about. Over the span of a single off-page day, Dick checked into the Lunarian attacks, made a connection to a criminal organization expansive enough to have plans for stealing space technology upgrade data, investigated the broader conspiracy, built a case against the massive organization with thorough evidence, arrested them all, processed them all at the precinct, drove back to Diet’s R&D factory house, got fitted for a literal suit of plot armor, and still had time to sit in a dark room for hours waiting for Ro-Zan to destroy a bunch of security equipment and thumb through Diet’s actual secret project files just to deliver a four-times-over redundant gotcha. We also now have confirmation that Ro-Zan really was on “probation” for his murders, treason, and attempted global genocide, and all those other subplots about stuff like Mysta’s history and the Anarctic Egyptian mummy never came up again after being raised. Welcome back, Mike Curtis.
@johnny lt: We three Kids of Gasoline are // Bearing Mice-a-roni, we traverse afar
@MKay: A friend once cared for a bunch of stray kittens until they were ready for adoption. Their names were Short Timer, Not Yours, Gone When Weaned, and Satan.
MW – Is “Stell” now going to end every sentence by saying “SOB” out loud, like, forever? Just shut up and eat your Chocolate Apathy.
Mary. Mary, Mary, Mary. Oh, how the meddlesome have fallen. You don’t already know, Mary? You don’t already know that StEd is Dead? That Stella’s not wella? That Ed’s currently sitting in his office furiously working on a needlepoint that says “Veterinarian, heal thyself”? What happened, Mary? Did you fire the Charterstone secret police in a fit of pique? Did your spies all fall asleep on the job? How are you supposed to fix everyone’s problems if you’re fifteen seconds behind the times? Maybe some [[squints]] Chocolate Why ice cream would go well with those [[squints]] underbaked chocolate chip muffins; your hidden cameras have told you that Stella’s got some in her freezer, so why don’t you swing by and finally catch up on what’s really goddamn important around here?
9CL: this is one of the most one-note comics ever
CANDORVILLE:. Fancy, schmantsy theories of physics. Bah! Any ol’ cranky man on street or cat can poke holes right through them.
CURTIS:. Barber Gunther is a Plugger!
MW: AI theorists worry about the concept of the “paperclip maximizer”: an ultra-intelligent AI given a simple objective – for example, make as many paperclips as possible – that proceeds to use its awesome power to take over and tear apart the entire world in single-minded pursuit of its goal. All that is to say, look at Mary’s kitchen. Should we be terrified that the muffin maximizer has started its apocalyptic work?
GA: If Chef Meowrice wasn’t a fictional product, I’d think Scanarelli was taking money for product placement.
@Baja Gaijin: Nice mayonnaise sandwich hint, a la Dick Tracy.
Rex Morgan, MILF Diver – I expect the next panel in this installment with be a loud FLUSH! with Mud emerging from the restroom he has just befouled. He’s ready to go on now!
Family Circlejerk – Greg smears peanut butter into an area he wants his dog to sniff every morning. That’s the secret, Dolly.
MW: I know this is impossible wishful thinking, because in Mary Worth everyone save the titular character and Wilbur must be heterosexually married, but really, Ed and Estelle should stay separated. Not just because they’re incredibly annoying and schmaltzy together, but also because they’re totally incompatible.
Ed is both addicted to his work and kind of an idiot, considering Estelle had to fix the issue for him in his last plot by volunteering at his clinic. It literally never occurred him after his assistant quit to hire more help until Estelle offered. How did he get through medical school with so little cerebral activity? Now somehow he’s gone from having the downtime to learn new songs to serenade her and do yoga with their pets to being unable to focus on any conversation about the wedding he proposed because The Animals Take Priority. His fiancée communicates that she’s unhappy with his work-life balance and his solution is…to take a case on Sunday, when his clinic isn’t open and patients should be directed to the convention’s worth of other vets in Santa Royale?
Meanwhile, Estelle has become so obsessed with her upcoming nuptials that she doesn’t even care about dead puppies. Also she wants a zoo-themed wedding so, you know, she’s the worst.
GT: I see Jami has one of those novelty rubber hammers. Perhaps the plan was to knock Keri out.
MW: Like you don’t know, Mary.
What the hell, Sophie? Get outta here with your real, normal name!
Sorry, but it’s been gnawing at the back of my mind throughout this storyline that it transitioned from Wilbur to Estelle and Ed within a single strip rather than having a clean break between storylines like Mary Worth normally does, implying this is really part of the same storyline as Wilbur’s descent into madness and the seemingly separate storylines would end up being tied together somehow, so I’ve been worried about the prospect of Estelle and Wilbur getting back together all along.
New-art Gil Thorp reminds me of a bad comic book I saw in the past.
I can’t remember which one exactly, so many comic books with terrible art but I wanna say the Silent Hill comics.
@Pozzo: GA: Along with Rat Pate’ and Chef Meow-R-Dee.
@Schroduck: Wasn’t that more or less addressed in Fantasia (The Sorcerer’s Apprentice)?
With the brooms simply tasked to carry water, and Mickey couldn’t stop them, they would keep carrying water until the end of time drowning everything in their path. (Thankfully Yen Sid put a stop to everything in the end but still)
Frazz: You should have farted, because I’m sure your farts smell like unicorns and rainbows.
Luann: “Karen Evans.” “Who?”
CS: Stop this story!
9CL: Oops, Edda almost trapped herself into having to give someone a compliment. She made a narrow escape, though.
@Baja Gaijin: Good thinking. Weelbur’s singing will put everyone off music for weeks so they won’t miss Lorry.
Zits: This reminds me of the time when we had a substitute teacher in our middle school science class, so I and another person took the opportunity to randomly mix chemicals together. We ended up creating a cloud of gas that temporary bleached by irises.
FC: “And he doesn’t mind that I lick his face.”
@jnoble: “ 9CL: this is one of the most one-note comics ever”
This is all part of the retcon whereby Seth was never gay, couldn’t have been ever gay because of the knockout pinup stunner in his ballet troupe.
Edda is an indifferent mother, has no apparent career anymore other than piano fucking, and now is not allowed to age but must be drawn as identical to her teenaged daughters.
I just don’t understand how the author wants us to react to these characters. “Knockout Pinup Stunner” is fine for a first impression, but what else does Edda have going on in her life anymore? She’s in an endless battle to continue to look like a Knockout Pinup Stunner. Her husband is losing his hair and gets more decrepit every time he appears in the strip, her daughters are trapped in the same “my ability to make men hard is my primary attribute!” dead end, and she spends most of her waking hours fishing for complements.
@Baja Gaijin: I like the incongruity of the deer in the Mary Worth mashup. I have a feeling Wilbur’s going to get run out of that bar if he keeps singing about zucchini quiche.
@taig: “ 9CL: Oops, Edda almost trapped herself into having to give someone a compliment. She made a narrow escape, though.”
Part of the larger trap she’s in. Knockout Pinup Stunner is all she has going for her. That’s all her kids care about, “is mom hotter than we are!? And how old is she by now, given that she has teenaged daughters?”
How long will she continue to have that picture in the attic to protect her?
@29 Lord Flatulence: I wanted to bet sure the Six Chix person doesn’t mistake it for a sex toy.
@39 Ukranazi Stepan: That’s the point–Truck doesn’t want a substitute better than himself.
@42 taig: The deer. Even more bizarre if you think Wilbur lives in a second or third floor flat.
Gil Thorp – Gil Thorp is a 66 year-old strip, so even if he’s stayed canonically the same age, even with the turnover in key talent in the last two years he’s aging like the rest of us.
Gasoline Alley – Not saying that Gasoline Alley is “hip” or with it, but through sheer force of surviving this long several of those once-old names are hip again, with Ava (#8), Luna (#10), Sophie (#60, but Sophia being #5), being among the top baby names in the US. If you are looking to scoop your friends with a “Unique” baby name I guess you can take Aubee (not top 1000), with its close counterparts Aubrey (#101) and Aubree (#296) running far enough behind that you don’t have to worry about too many girls with the same name in their kindergarten class.
Mary Worth – Mary isn’t rhetorically wondering how Estelle is doing for narrative purposes. She is consulting the spirits via the Worth form of divination via baked goods. Like tea leaves, how the placement and density of blueberries (?) in those muffins will reveal the truth.
I too like to verbalize my frustrations over a breakup by sitting my pets down at the dinner table, cry-eat iecream in front of them and exposit to them precisely what’s going on.
@Amelie Wikström: Although I don’t know about putting my elbows on the table. I’ve still got some dignity.
Those are children? Being off-panel in Gasoline Alley really ages a person!
Our science experiment was to spend a weekend breaking off the tips of 9,000 wooden matches, wrapping them in aluminum foil, and throwing the thing in school first thing Monday morning. After all, if we could get school dismissed for the day, might as well do it in the morning. That part failed – school wasn’t called off – but we did clear out the building and the fire department out with big fans to clear the smoke. So . . . partial victory.
Lessons learned: When you do this in January in Minnesota and are the only three people gathered outside who are wearing coats, it’s kind of a giveaway about who did it. Also, you may emit a strong sulfur smell, another giveaway. But the main lesson from those years: deny, deny, deny. Until you admit guilt, there’s nothing they can do.
I learned a lot in high school.
@Weaselboy: Cathy Chocolate Ice Cream. Slogan: The AAAACK! is BAAAAACK!
RMMD-“Do you know anyone who can play a guitar?”
MW-Time for Mary Worth to make her big play and look like the hero.
FC-Is that why Dolly put on KY jelly that morning?
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: Whoever says those years are worthless is wrong.
@Lauralot: This is the best post of 2024. Josh has to give some kind of award or something.
A deep bow.
Sixty years reading Beetle Bailey and I’ve never once wondered “What kind of music is he into?” I bet it’s Don Ho’s Greatest Hits.
BF: Relax, Maeve. You’re only the latest in a very long list of North Americans who went to Paris to get laid.
FC: ”Because that’s all his family has to eat. They are desperately poor.”
@Lauralot: 100% correct. When neither partner is capable of verbalizing minor conflicts like “I don’t want an extravagant wedding” and “I need you to honor social commitments”, the whole thing just isn’t going to work. Ed and Estelle have both proven themselves so awful that Mary meddling them back together wouldn’t be much better than meddling Estelle back into Wilbur. Like in politics, some races never be a toss-up, but they are.
Today’s MW actual strip was eaten by a virus.
Estelle pouring her feelings out to her anthropomorphic pets, while Mary bakes another six dozen muffins, is the standby all-purpose entry you Break Glass in Case of Emergency for.
Gil Thorp-Gil is in the hands of Rex Morgan. You don’t want to be there.
Crankshaft-What’s so awful about this book? I wish they would deal with a book that has sexually explicit material in it.
I’m a sicko because I want the Wilbur-Stella reunion. They deserve each other.
Normally she had to bake the muffins before the state took hold. But this time, merely mixing the ingredients brought on the fugue, known by prophets and oracles from Delphi to the highest mountains, the fog that descended and lifted and exposed the world and the future and all that could be. Mary opened herself to glory, and mumbled the words ‘I wonder how Stell’s doing with her wedding planning?’ The world spun, righted, and presented today again. ‘I hear you, o lord of muffins and meddling,’ Mary intoned with respect. ‘I know what must be done.’
Miz Gertie’s a brave woman. No way would I let those truly hideous demon-doll things into my house, free cat food or not. As today is October 1st, I’d suggest that maybe they intend to make the kittens their witchy familiars for some sort of Halloween-related storyline, but Gasoline Alley just doesn’t move that fast, unless they’re setting us up for Halloween 2025.
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV: My kind of people.
MW: “Oh, Estelle, I’m so sorry things didn’t work out with Dr. Ed. Of course, as I told you, that relationship was unsanctioned and bound to end badly. Now, let’s see what we can do to make things better. You know, Wilbur has a lot of endearing quirks! He’s a diamond in the rough! And once you get used to them, his farts aren’t that horrible!”
“My meddling sense is tingling — either Stella broke up with her vet, or Wilbur’s other fish died.”
MW: Awww, look at those smiling faces! Beasts have no concept of this “marriage” Estelle speaks of;, hell, they don’t even understand “monogamy”. They’re only thinking that if any of that ice cream drips, they’re going for it.
GT – “So, after every meal I take these Herbalife supplements. Let me show you our exciting new product line!”
GT: And so begins the “(barney google and) SNUFFY SMITH” transition which, in thirty years, will have people laughing uproariously at the antics of Marty Moon and wondering vaguely why the strip is named “Gil Thorp”.
GT: Yesterday Gil was in an ordinary sunlit hospital room without so much as an IV stand around him. Today he’s in a darker, machine-filled space that looks a lot more like what I remember from my dad’s visit to the CCU. Also I’m guessing that’s Beth saying “Keri?” in panel two, but it looks like the narration is saying “Wait, is this Keri? I’m not sure.” All in all, meet the new artist, same as the old artist.
MW: “Woof…”: About time! You’re too good for him, girl!
“Meow…”: And you can drop the age play language. We didn’t consent to your kink!
@Liam: Right before Batiuk’s cultural awareness just stopped, Fahrenheit 451 had some controversial elements per social mores at the time. He is completely unaware of the media being targeted today. Either that, or he doesn’t want to risk his livelihood getting cancelled by actually taking a stance on a modern book ban.
Also…penises.
GA – “We came to welcome those kittens to the world! And there’s NO WAY all of us will be leaving with a kitten each, ha ha!”
Don Abundio, translated:
“Sometimes I think this computer is getting almost too smart”
“Well, it’s 5 o’clock! Let’s go get a drink!”
“What’s that?”
“It says: ‘Where are you going in that outfit, a clown convention?'”
MW – No it’s not Chocolate Cathy. Estelle has wisely chosen a pint of Chocolate Mr. Abernathy, the richest comic-strip-themed ice cream money can buy!
I’m kidding, it’s really the slightly dyslexic comfort food, Chocolate Perathy.
DT: I’m kinda gonna miss all these glow-in-the-dark eyeballs when this story wraps. Maybe Sam Catchem can conjure his, using his Judaistic-leprechaun magics.
JP: “Nice crucifix. Are you two actually nuns? Because here in Southern California, most young women aren’t really into that burqa look you’re sporting.”
9CL: Remember, Juliette is now a grandmother, and she still looks like a damn pin-up. And wears leopard-print underpants. And induces horny fainting in her rapidly-aging thrall. I guess the Burber gene pool lets you look great until you hit 80, and then you dissolve overnight into the sourpuss wrinkly crabby crone that is Edna, aka “Gran.”
LUANN: Karen Evans: “See? It is totally possible for me as a middle-aged woman to still be considered young and desirable. Er…I mean ”Nancy’. I meant ‘Nancy’ can still be considered young and desirable. I mean, Istill find these older celebrities desirable and as a ‘hot’ ‘youthful’ women myself, my taste clearly aligns with 20-year-olds. I don’t know why people keep saying I’m using this strip as a substitution for therapy….”
MW: Wilbur kills one pet due to incompetence and has a near mental break about it, whereas Dr. Ed kills pets every day due to competence and is emotionally dead inside! Point to Wilbur!
C’shaft: Why is Crankshaft hanging around Lillian’s home/business well after dark? On second thought, don’t tell me, there’s no good answer to that question.
DT: So that’s it? Man, the Minit Mysteries have more complicated plots than this.
Dustin: No, no, you’re confusing “preps” with “nerds,” or possibly the great Latin grammar scene in Life of Brian.
JP: “Aiden, come here! Your brother’s been sticking his dick in the crazy again!”
Luann: Tiffany has a point–Hollywood celebrities have the time and money to invest in staving off the effects of aging, and in their image-focused industry have ample incentive to do so. Most sixty-somethings aren’t walking around looking like Brad Pitt or Demi Moore.
RMMD: “Have you heard of these newfangled recording machines…?”
SH: Ewwww, they’re playing in her dandruff!
@Batiuk’s Attic: I just read a book that said the best thing about the marriage of King George IV and his wife (apparently both loathsome creatures) was that it saved two other people from having to be married to them. I think the same may hold true here.
REX MORGAN: Wanda: “What about your gigs. Are you going to cancel all 0 of them?”
Truck hasn’t played a “gig” in this strip since he headlined with Mud Murphy back when he was burly and interesting. I mean without his guitar playing, Truck will have nothing to do but sit in the diner all day. That’ll be such a disruption to his usual routine!
@taig: Also, “they’re trying to censor a book that’s about censorship, oh the irony!” is the sort of subtle, nuanced message Tom Batiuk is famous for.
@erdmann: I mean, the best thing you can say about either Wilbur or Stell is that they haven’t show any signs of being chummy with Nazis. Yet.
GT: Syndicate to artist: “You need more ink already?! That was supposed to last a month!”
MW: Stell’s emergency vet visit after feeding chocolate ice cream to Libby and Pierre promises to be awkward.
MW: it seems Estelle doesn’t so much want to be married as she wants a wedding–a big,, extravagant, unnecessary wedding. Oh crap, I sound like Mary.
Gasoline Alley: The three Wise Girls come bearing gifts of Chef Meowrice, Mice-a-Roni, and cat treats to welcome the new cat-messiah.
CS: As Crankshaft watched in curiosity, Lillian turned from the window and picked up one of the books. Her face an unreadable, inflexible mask, she pulled a small can of Aquanet from her purse and sprayed the tome liberally.
Returning to the window, Lillian took a lighter from her purse, lit a corner of the saturated book and hurled it toward the protestors. Like a lightning bolt hurled by Zeus, the book hit the ground amidst the crowd and exploded. The man who had defaced the store’s sign went down immediately, engulfed in flames. Others ran screaming, trying to free themselves from the bits of burning book, bits that clung to them like napalm. A woman remembered “stop, drop and roll” but even as she extinguished the flames consuming her blouse a burning man tripped and fell on her.
Crankshaft turned away from the carnage and looked at Lillian. Her expression, or lack thereof, had not changed. “T-those people…” Crankshaft stated in a trembling voice. “They… they’re burning. You did that…”
“Fight fire with fire,” she said impassively.
Slowly a smile crept across Crankshaft’s weathered face. “My God, Lillian! I love you!”
@Baja Gaijin: I wanted to be sure the Six Chix person doesn’t mistake it for a sex toy.
_______________________________________
Not just a sex toy, but a love interest.
MW: Hey, Mary. I just stopped by Estelle’s place. She needs your help in planning for the wedding. I wouldn’t bring muffins, though. It’s gonna take a while. How about a nice casserole. Nice and bubbling hot. The door’s open, so just walk in and ask Estelle how things are going.
GA: There is one of those designer cat foods called “Smalls”. It’s “specially designed” for your cat’s individual needs and is shipped to your home.
One of their flavors is “GROUND BIRD”.
What kind of bird? Chicken? Pheasant? Spotted owl? Eagle?
Chef Meowrice may wanna come up with a more downmarket version.
I’d love it if she got there and Ed said, “Sorry, can’t save your pets. I have a hot date.”
GT: Looks like the new artist is afflicted with the Giella syndrome, lopsided faces adorned with ill-fitting wigs.
GT – I wanna stay here – and with a wall of AV swag like that it’s small wonder….
GA – This is like the gospels – gifts of fish guts, chicken guts and meat byproducts….
MW – Yes – the wedding is off – SON OF A BITCH!
Adios Amigos, DJ.
Mary Worth: “The wedding is off! Son of a bitch!”
(I realize this joke has been made before. That’s because Moy keeps doing the same thing.)
Gil Thorp: Gil Thorp’s tendency to jump around schizophrenically between plotlines is getting so bad that even the characters are mixing them up now. Keri is clearly confused as to why her dad is in a coma instead of responding to her “very special episode” speech about bulimia.
Mary Worth: “I wonder how Stell’s doing with her wedding planning. Oh well, none of my business. I’m too busy making these amorphous white blobs.”
FC – And it’s really funny when three of the other kids go into anaphylactic shock.
Mary Worth – Mary’s meddlesense must be off the charts. No one would make that many muffins otherwise.
I wonder if she bakes one batch at a time or if she has an industrial strength mixer and a muffin tin with ten dozen muffin cups.
Crankshaft – Lillian angrily leans out the window. “Listen, you assholes! I ruined my sister’s life, and I can ruin yours!”
Pluggers – Oh, great. Now I have that annoying commercial stuck in my head. I didn’t want an earworm of “I’m lowering my A1C!”
Ripley’s – You mean The Banana Boat Song is a lie?
9CL – Someone assumes that Edda notices other people and has an opinion of them beyond how much they worship her. And we say that there’s never anything new in this strip.
MW – Isn’t the whole point of oven mitts that you can touch hot objects, with, y’know, you’re entire hand? Or, has Mary forgotten that she has opposable thumbs?
@BeckoningChasm:
Lol! The devil’s already there and the sulfur is in those cookies
Gasoline Alley: The indication with brand names like “Rat Pate” and “Mice-a-Roni” are that there exist cat food companies that feed actual processed rodents to cats. Although I suppose rodents are a part of a cat’s “natural” diet, I don’t imagine this would be embraced by the cat-owning community.
Crankshaft-“We’ve come to burn the creepy bus driver!”
Luann-Stifler’s Mom
Meanwhile …in the Hall of Meddling, Mary manufactures a million muffins…
@I speak Jive: How would you like to to be the executive in charge of catering and kitchen stocking for a major cruise line, and have to explain to all the tourists at the “Make Your Own Banana Split” bar?
@Lord Flatulence: Not just a sex toy, but a love interest.
______________________________________
“It’s a dessert topping AND a floor wax!”
@astroboy: Mary usually relies on her “helper tentacles,” so she often forgets the thumbs her skin-suit possesses.