Don’t really like that Snuffy and Granny Creeps are just kind of friends now. Seems wrong
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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/5/25
Wow, I had always assumed that Hootin’ Holler was cut off from outside civilization to the extent that it’s blessedly not affected by unrealistic youth and beauty culture, but here I see that not only am I wrong but even the local chthonic witch is feeling insecure about herself. Fortunately, she’s invented a potion that can magically tailor clothes, and if she can refine it to be more easily controlled she’ll be able to afford all the more conventional beauty enhancement treatments she wants.
Dennis the Menace, 4/5/25
Usually it’s Dennis who interprets a normal turn of phrase in a way that’s wrong and kind of insulting, and I like his facial expression here in panel two, in which game seems to be recognizing game.
Crankshaft, 4/5/25
I’ve only started revisiting Crankshaft again in the past couple months but I’m sincerely glad to have gotten here in time to see Pam discover that her husband has been draining the family bank accounts to buy bootleg Huckleberry Hound DVDs. Do you think they’re going to divorce over this? I sure hope so!
Luann, 4/5/25
“Oh,” you’ve probably been thinking, “I guess Brad and Toni are doing a whole week at the amusement park, but at least it probably won’t end with them fucking in their car in the parking lot.” You fool. You idiot. You naive simpleton.
129 replies to “Don’t really like that Snuffy and Granny Creeps are just kind of friends now. Seems wrong”
Crankshart – Josh, for some reason I presumed Jeff was buying VHS tapes, not DVDs. I don’t know why that made the story more realistic to me, but it just did. I hope he got some Snagglepuss, too.
Luann-Toni and Brad will discover that you can’t get pregnant if you do anal.
MW-Due to how much it costs to use those songs none of them will be sung.
BG&SS: Is Granny Creeps a Swiftie now? Slut!
@yUkulele Ike: The story on NPR talked about the gigs he played literally on the night of his death: Michael Hurley obituary. Alas, no mention of Have Moicy.
Luann: Since most every parking lot has surveillance these days, Toni and Brad will have a video of whatitsname’s conception to share with friends and family for years to come, which, thankfully, they’ll be able to download free off the internet.
BGSS: The two questions I had upon reading this strip were ‘why is Snuffy hanging out with Granny Creeps?’ and ‘Why is Granny Creeps taking a potion to look younger?’ and I’m afraid the answer to both of them is ‘the most disgusting comics page affair imaginable’.
DtM: It’s funny because of course he won’t. The best chance Dennis has in ‘going far in life’ is becoming a rail-riding hobo or a crash test dummy for Boeing.
CSft: Ha, it’s funny because when I read ‘vintage television videos’ I immediately thought ‘pornos’, which of course isn’t…well, actually now I’m not sure, both in the sense that I’m not sure if they ever made Hanna Barbara erotica, and I’m not sure if Jeff would jerk it to regular old cartoons.
Luann: No wonder they’ve not gotten pregnant, they’ve been using the ‘back seat’…
FBOFW:. This happened to me for the first time last week– had a mouthful of lunch when I was attacked by an irrepressible sneeze. Oh my gosh, so unsightly! (Yes a napkin over the mouth saved the day)
FRAZZ:. And in the midst of all our rain this week, I noticed how lush some of our spring vegetation looked. The other 2/3 was downded.
PHANTOM:. Does anyone know this guy?
R w/ O:. A clever twist on a soggy saying.
6CX:. A clever twist on a post-animalapocalypse (?) fairy tale.
ZITS:. Friends: People who use same apps you do.
BG&SS I don’t think I can handle this assault on Granny Creeps’ professionalism? Well, I suppose innovation comes at a cost.
CS – And this is a “Christ! What an asshole!” Moment, because I’m guessing that a Hanna Barbera DVD collection costs less the a quarter of what the “cloud seeding drone” cost. So Ed can go fuck himself.
BG&SS:
“I guess th’ only solution to this problem is potion control, Snuffy!”
@richardf8: NOOOO! and that is a travesty. All-time classic, though I guess Hurley is only on about a third of it.
(I put the detailed personnel breakdown on the wikipedia article for the album. If anyone wants to write a reliably sourced article saying that Stampfel sang “Hoodoo Bash,” let me know; the back cover doesn’t have the lead vocal credited so I’m not allowed to put in the info even though it’s pretty obvious.)
Rip Haywire – Noooooo! Not the pancake-flippin’ nerve!
BG&SS: Granny, did you try taking your clothes off before spraying yourself with the potion? I would apologize for that mental image, but now that Josh is covering Luann again, God is dead and it is the age of monsters.
CS: Crank and Hubby bond over their shared love of Mr Green Jeans.
BGSS: Granny Creeps has to sew on a bunch of patches to bring those distressed jeans into Hootin’ Holler fashion compliance.
Bwad and Tonic awkwardly trying to screw in the back seat of their car is still probably less cringe making than Dusk and Bats Bellefry singing hate songs at each other while Weelbur looks increasingly confused.
RMMD: I’m no lawyer Augie but I think you need to stop talking to Colombo. He’s trying to pin Stalker’s fatal heart attack on you.
@matt w: Because, of course, that’s not enough of a contribution to mention the album, even if his avatar and nickname are on the cover art. NPR was probably just to coy.
“The back seat”? Toni, you can’t get pregnant that way!
@Dan: 20 comments and I’m the third to make this joke. Well, I guess it’s true what they say about CC readers…
RMMD: hey Colombo has it crossed your wee walnut-sized brain to check the car for signs of violence? Was Stalker shot? Was he beat to death? Tell us.
@Activist: Phantom – that’s Kit’s monk mentor in the Mountain City threatened by we-can’t-say-China. I forgot but Google says Kyabje Dorje
So, does this count as Snuffy Smith joining the long, long list of strips making jokes about distressed jeans? Probably not because it’s not specifically a joke about buying them pre-distressed, though Hootin’ Holler seems not to have much of a concept of “buying” anything and it’s not like it would be that remarkable there, so this may be as close as they’d get.
Nothing like a leadoff Scrote for the week with a snark about anal. Thank you for that.
@Professor Well Actually: Heck, is he even dead? As far as the reader can tell, they haven’t opened the car doors and checked for a pulse. The writer might want to try to remember that it’s a medical strip and show what EMT work is.
MW: Both Wilbur and Belle have developed scoliosis. In Belle’s case, it’s so severe that it’s caused a muscle spasm strong enough to stretch out her neck and make her eye twitch. Because of these debilitating circumstances, neither of them have noticed that in Panel One, Dawn has been replaced by an angry Pinocchio.
Rex Morgan MILF Diver – I hope Augie Doggy Style is at least allowed conjugal visits by Summer. (I once saved my date from getting busted at a concert at the Minneapolis Auditorium by letting a cop jump on me and throw me out of the building. And I still didn’t get laid. Better luck to Augie.)
@CanuckDownSouth: For those coming in late, Savarna has shot Jampa, this time without any contact from Junior to connect her to his mentor, because Heloise is keeping him in Bangalla trying to get him to stick his dick in crazy. Meanwhile Barista girl from the mountain city seems to be setting out to track Junior down because she is the not-crazy that Junior should be sticking his dick in. I believe with perfect faith that hilarity will ensue.
Luann: Aaaaand cue the knife-wielding mugger, or Officer Columbo from RMMD, or some other ‘coitus interruptus’ excuse for why B-wad and Toni will not be conceiving tonight, or any other night for that matter.
Seriously, who the hell stays so long after an amusement park closes that theirs is literally the ONLY car left in a massive parking lot?!
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: Heavens to Murgatroyd!!
RMMD:
“You literally supposedly just got up, ma’am, and you’ve got lipstick on? Where’s a grand jury that can get impaneled?”
Maybe that still would be less humiliating than video of the arrest of Reese McGuire on his solo car date. Even better is Cal Quantrill using the incident to break the log jam in a Fuck You-off with McGuire. This is must-see stuff.
@Snagglepuss: You’re still famous and beloved. In the show Fisk there is a seen with an obnoxious guy saying, “Exit, stage left,” to which Helen replies, “Snagglepuss, right?”
Mary Worth: Getting irritable about death threats: is Dawn made of iron, or just real dumb?
CS: I look forward to Pam’s Hubby (Phubby?) hitting Crank over the head with a guitar while shouting “El Kabong!”
RMMD: something that bugs me about cop dramas is that a suspect who has the gall to refuse to answer questions without his lawyer present is invariably seen as guilty. After all no innocent persons would need a lawyer.
BBGS: “It made me look younger! Like Christina Aguilera in the ‘Genie in a Bottle’ video circa 1999! So… mid-40s now, I guess.”
Crank: Jeff has been throwing away the family savings on vintage full-bush softcore videos. The Hanna Barbera rerun is unrelated.
@pugfuggly:
Being a “rail riding hobo” is probably every six-year old’s dream.
Today’s Mary Worth is a great example of the time displacement that exists in the newspaper comics page. Dawn is a current college student, which puts her date of birth in the 21st century. Belle is named after a Disney princess that didn’t exist before 1991. Their song choices are from 1985 and 1973, respectively. Even Wilbur chose a song from 1969, a year which must be at or near his birth. He should at least be into something late-70s, like Kiss or Steve Miller Band. Even disco would be an improvement.
And even if you ignore how dated they are, these song choices suck. So many Beatles songs have the passive-aggressive Paul versus John subtext, that there’s must be a better choice. And half of Tom Petty’s song catalog is about telling people where to piss off to. I would have gone obscure, with “Zombie Zoo” from Full Moon Fever. “Is your mother in a clinic? Has your father got no job?” It’d basically be telling Belle she’s a hooker. Which would serve the story much better.
Oh well. If we acknowledged any music from the last generation and a half, we’d have to acknowledge the entire genre of diss tracks. And we can’t have *that* in Santa Royale.
Crankshaft: I actually know the street value of huckleberry hound show DVDs offhand and…20 dollars is not the big gotcha either of them thinks it is.
RMMD: This slow, deliberate setting of the trap is reminiscent of Hitchcock, or at least Columbo. “Oh, Mr. Augie, there’s just one more thing I don’t understand.”
MW: Really, Wilbur? “All Together Now” is the best you can come up with? Maybe you can segue that right into “I Am the Walrus.”
GT: “Heart and soul, Ms. Rumore. Heart and soul. I’d sell the soul of everyone on this team for a championship, and if I don’t get one, I’ll cut out their hearts. Oh, by the way, that’s off the record.”
Blondie: The back of Dagwood’s head is the most disturbing-looking thing I have seen in a long, long while.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: Heavens to Murgatroyd!!@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: Ha ha thanks for quote! As the first (and only) pink cartoon. puma produced by Hanna Barbera I’m glad to still be remembered, even.
GT/MW:
“I know what I’d sing at Karaoke Wilbur!”
“What’s that Gil?”
“Two o’clock this morning
If Ms Rumore should come a calling
I couldn’t dream of turning her away
And if Beth got hot and hectic
I know she’d be electric
I’d let them both hit a homer with me!
You see, she gets what she wants
‘Cause she’s heart and soul
She’s hot and cold
Milford’s got it all!
We lose with heart and soul!”
Mary Worth: Belle now has Wilbur’s face.
Rex Morgan: Who’s writing this, Eric Costello?
@Dan: That we’re a bunch of effin’ perverts?
Snuffy – “My goodness, Granny Creeps!! Why, without your glasses, you’re… beautiful!”
“I don’t wear glasses, Snuffy.”
Don Abundio, translated:
“My producer wants me to shoot a movie in Brazil”
“How exciting… Filming in a foreign country!”
“That’s what worries me, Abundio”
“I don’t speak a word of Spanish!”
@richardf8: Thanks to you (or whoever) mentioned Hurley’s passing last night. I’d never heard of him or the Holy Modal Rounders,* so now it looks like I’ve got some great music to check out!
*There was a folk version of the Velvet Underground. Who knew?
SS: If ripped jeans are the epitome of youth fashion, then Hootin’ Holler has been the Carnaby Street of Appalachia for decades.
@Peanut Gallery: “Oh, right. Without my glasses, you’re beautiful Granny Creeps!”
Crankshaft: Television videos. Television videos. Television videos. Vendo machine, vendo machine, vendo machine. Solo car date! Solo car date!
MW: Instead of deciding to just end things by dropping Dawn off at home and taking Belle to a hotel, Wilbur is instead deciding to make them both serenade him. Y’know, those “endearing quirks” at work.
If “Brad and Toni getting horny in the back seat” doesn’t result in Brad having jumper cables attached to his nipples, why, I don’t know why I read Luann anymore.
MW: Before the syndication editor got into the script, Belle chose The Ramones’ Beat on the Brat and Dawn then led the crowd in a rousing rendition during which she sang “You see little sister don’t miss when she aims her gun”.
Blondie: And that’s how Dagwood learned the phrase upper endoscomy.
BG&SS: Thanks to the potion Granny Creeps is the only person in Hootin’ Holler whose clothes don’t have patches.
GT: “Heart and soul” means “a scintilla of talent backed up by over a dozen ‘great hustle guys’ “.
H&L:
“But first, let’s go to your car, Thirsty.”
“What? I’m driving your kids–”
“No. We’re not leaving you here with them until you blow a max .05 on the ignition interlock.”
CS: Those videos will be used. Those tools will gather dust in the garage in the space where a car should park.
MW: Predicting the end of this arc
Belle attacks Dawn and puts her in the hospital.
Wilbur goes to Mary for advice.
Wilbur: Should I pay Belle’s bond?
Mary: Of course, her actions are just enduring quirks.
Wilbur: But you never even met her, or saw what she did. Only what I told you.
Mary: ENDURING QUIRKS, FATBOY!!
You know, I feel like this whole “Batshit Belle wants to kill Dawn so she can have Wilbur all to herself” plot could have been avoided if Wilbur didn’t decide to give Belle his address. If she wanted to visit him, she could have found a hotel and he could have visited her rather than drag Dawn along with because apparently Dawn is five years old and can’t be left alone.
What I’m saying is that Wilbur is at fault for this and you just know that he’s going to get his ego inflated because someone is willing to kill in order to be with him. After all, like he told Dawn when she said she had a bad relationship that was verbally abusive, you should forget the bad things and only remember what you want to.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: I bet you’re hoping for the spy-themed porn parody, Snagglepussy.
@matt w: Are you sure that’s Peter Stampfel on “Hoodoo Bash?” Sounds to me like Perry Como.
(Seriously, how could anyone fail to recognize a Stampfel lead vocal?)
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV:
Television videos
When you need a circomlocution to avoid saying “VHS” or “DVD” or “Streaming service subscription”. (Come on, Jeff is totally the kind of guy who subscribes to a service SPECIFICALLY and EXCLUSIVELY because it has cartoons from his childhood on it).
Also :
@Jake:
Whether VHS or DVD or subscription, yeah, Jeff’s cartoon addiction is LEAGUES less expensive than Crankshaft’s gardening gadget addiction.
Jeff’s more frequent comic book anthology addiction is probably more expensive, but a) probably still less so than all the crap Crankshaft buys; b)this strip would NEVER criticise buying comics as being wastefulJeff is getting kicked out because, despite his expenses being lesser, Crankshaft is still the sole breadwinner of the household, so the freeloader’s got to go.
(I’m betting than in the next two months, we’ll probably get the yearly “JEFF DOES TOO HAVE A JOB” strip)**************
Dustin : speaking of a household deciding to toss out a useless manchild…
Yeah, like the DustinFamily would EVER actually do more than just constantly complain about Dustin’s laziness while also constantly enabling him…*************
Luann : So, Bwad and Toni get amorous when they become nauseous? Cute, because everyone else becomes nauseous when they get amorous!
H&L: how can the Flagstones afford to patronize the fancy scmanzy high end restaurants that require men to wear a suit and tie?
MW: Are karaoke songs listed by artist, genre or topic? Like, is there a Death and Loathing list?
DtM: “You should be on stage. There’s one leaving town in five minutes.” A Matt Dillon’s Dad joke.
RMMD: Summer sleeps with loose hair. Now I’m thinking that whenever she stands up, it automatically morphs into a ponytail, like superheroes’ costumes materialize in the movies.
MW While Belle has a “oh my another another line of coke!” expression, I’m genuinely loving Dawn’s “oh please just f*cking die!” face.
Luann: it’s the kid. Toni’s kid stowed away in the back seat. C’mahn, it’s ahbviyuss!
@MKay: RMMD: Hahaha I love it!
Well, depends on Granny Creep’s definition of “younger”
If the potion worked and she becomes a young hip teenager, will she say “Screw potions, I have a new future now!”
Or would she say “What the dafu– am I doing in this creepy cave?” (immediately starts texting on her phone)
@richardf8:Re Micheal Hurley: Thanks for this link and mention of Have Moicy (“…oh sweet Lucy..”).
BG&SS – That old black magic – the battery acid beauty treatment….
DtM – Ah – that George Wilson really zinged Dennis with that one! There’s a lesson in going around bragging about his prospects, which we all know are dim. Maybe something like a life of drudgery working for the post office, until you’re no more useful than an old worn out boot, and are pensioned off to a bitter meaningless existence. He sure nailed you this time, Dennis….
Crank – Huh – I’m surprised Crank is hip to Rule 34, Huckleberry Hound porn, but it sure shut down their assault on his garden tool fetish….
Luann – Now back to that baby making drudgery….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
Pam, he’s a school bus driver. You’ll be lucky if your inheritance pays for dinner after the funeral. Let your aging father enjoy his damned hobby that keeps him active and puts a little bit of food on the table in this economy.
***
A magical potion that keeps up with fashion trends? Get it on the market NOW, Granny Creeps, before the goons at The Gap arrange an unfortunate accident for you.
BGSS: I mean, it did wonders for your posture too….
C’shaft: It’s not everyday I’ll indulge Jeff’s obsession with the media of his youth (or more accurately Tom Batiuk’s youth, since Jeff is probably around my age and should be more into old Transformers and G.I. Joe episodes), but I’ll take amateur archiving and preservation of physical media over Crankshaft buying a goddamn tractor for his little backyard zucchini garden.
Luann: On the list of “places that popular culture has told us is a great place to have sex, but in reality are unpleasantly awkward, uncomfortable, or otherwise undesirable,” the back seat of a car ranks just above a hot tub but below a beach where salt water periodically drenches you while you get sand in every possible crevice.
@TheDiva:
Luann: On the list of “places that popular culture has told us is a great place to have sex, but in reality are unpleasantly awkward, uncomfortable, or otherwise undesirable,” the back seat of a car ranks just above a hot tub but below a beach where salt water periodically drenches you while you get sand in every possible crevice.
Preach! The only reason to have sex in a car is if you’re a teenager with absolutely no better option. Otherwise, even a fleabag motel has a horizontal surface suitable for making the beast with two backs.
Dustin: The closest the Kudliks get to family bonding is when three of them get together to all complain about how much they hate the fourth. (Dustin is usually the fourth, but occasionally one of the parents teams up with the kids to go after their spouse.)
GT: “So, another year of barely scraping .500. Got it.”
MW: Oh come on, Dawn, Train’s “Fifty Ways to Say Goodbye” would be much more cathartic. And Wilbur, if you’re trying to make peace you probably shouldn’t go with a song that asks “Can I take my friend to bed?”
SH: Yes, a little mermaid who wishes to be part of your world. That’s an angle absolutely nobody has ever explored before.
Luann, a haiku
Amusement park kiss
Streetlight, empty parking lot
Back seat seems roomy
@CanuckDownSouth:
#22. Thanks, CDS, if they can pin murder on him, OMM’s prophecy can still come true. But who would set him up?
@Ukulele Ike: Unfortunately, I believe that by Wikipedia rules “listen to that song it is obviously Peter Stampfel” counts as original research.
(I could probably add it in anyway, it’s not like the Have Moicy! article is so hotly edited that anyone will mind.)
@richardf8: The Rolling Stone obit does prominently feature Have Moicy!, though it muddles the attribution something fierce (“two bandmates”? and Hurley and Jeffrey Frederick both got title billing along with the Unholy Modal Rounders, so-called I think because Steve Weber wasn’t on the gig).
@Activist: That’s the interesting thing, I thought having Kit and Kyabje nowhere near during the murder ended it. But this sudden “monks need a secret discussion about Jampa’s murder” sounds like the country-that-must-not-be-named is going to pin it on the monastery *anyhow* – just because. Maybe they were just looking for an excuse and we’re headed into some plot where it’s a lot harder to evade Fate than the purple one thought.
@TheDiva: re: Luann: Glad I’m not the only one who watches that famous beach n’ surf scene between Deborah Kerr and Burt Lancaster in From Here to Eternity and says “Ugh, no thanks.”
I hope there was a beach showerhead so they could wash off the sand and sticky saltwater. I feel gross just thinking about it.
@Old School Allie Cat: As a teen, my partner and I would bring an inflatable pool raft to the area in the lake community designated as wetlands. It was a wooded, secluded area. The list of things feeling or getting swampy was more than 1.
@Banana Jr. 6000:
Yet, ironically enough, fifty or sixty something Stella picks Taylor Swift songs when she does karaoke
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX:
You’re welcome.
Crankshaft-Don’t be upset at Jeff. He’s doing a service by buying old television videos that aren’t available anywhere else. He’s preserving valuable entertainment history.
Crankshaft – I’m flabbergasted that Cranky whatabouted Jeff buying cartoon videos instead of all the money he spent on Silver Age comics reprints. Of course, in Batiuk’s mind comics are sacred, so that purchase is totally fine.
Mary Worth – How about singing some Patsy Cline? “Crazy….”
Keep the Beatles out of this dreck.
S4th – Mary Worth needs to read that second panel.
Rex Morgan – @Professor Well Actually: @CanuckDownSouth: Beatty is a mess at writing medical stories, and now he’s bringing his special talent to police procedurals. Michael Connelly he’s not.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX:
Many years ago before I retired, there was a discussion in our unit about the cartoon cat who said “I hate meeces to pieces.” I thought it was Snagglepuss, but it turned out to be Mr. Jinx. The comments about Snagglepuss reminded me of this. Exit stage left.
BG&SS: I think it’s great that Snuffy is now buddies with Granny Creeps. That would seem to make Hootin’ Holler more enlightened than the Land of Oz, which is a cheering thought in an angry and divided world.
@I speak Jive: I somehow always thought that quote was “I hates meeces to pieces,” but I checked and your version is the right one. Thank you.
MT: This is unnerving. Yesterday I griped that that the term should be “environmental advisor” and not “environmentalist advisor,” and today Kelly said it correctly. It’s not a superpower, but I’ll take it.
The sack of Baghdad in 1258? Oh, Hulegu. You amateur. The vengeance wrought by Dennis for this insult will show how feeble you were. He will…step on Mr. Wilson’s flowers or something? Christ, Dennis sucks.
@Poteet: That was totally by accident. I was going by memory and didn’t look it up. Your version sounds like something a cartoon cat would say.
“Vintage television videos” is a bizarre For Better or Worse-esque phrase (like “Solo car date”) that we’re all worse off for being aware of.
@I speak Jive: I could not remember what the cat looked like, so I just checked and found out that canonically, it’s Mr. Jinks. I think “Jinx” would be more appropriate for a cartoon cat and would also go better with Pixie and Dixie, but there it is. Then I looked up a YouTube segment with the trio and was reminded that Mr. Jinks had a very interesting voice and that the relationship between him and the mice was interesting and multifaceted. Now I’m getting offline for awhile before I go right down that rabbit hole.
C-Shaft: Pam didn’t notice that Jeff was on a Hanna-Barbera buying spree but now that it’s been brought to her attention she’s putting her foot down. Yeah, this marriage is in tremendous shape.
SSmith: Gotta say, jeans/sweat pants distressed in this particular pattern aren’t a fashion trend I’ve noticed among the young ‘uns, or anyone else.
@BeckoningChasm: Rex Morgan: Who’s writing this, Eric Costello?
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
No, Elvis Costello.
9CL: The snow-topped dude whose name is apparently Walter Bubbletea *slow, sad headshake* will expire in conceiving the next generation of Burberettes, which is good news for him.
Dustin: “We’re trading you and ten grand for Jeremy Duncan from Zits.”
GA: Now it can be told. The reason Barney Google still takes an extended visit or two to Hootin’ Holler is to get a cheap codeine fix.
GT: Nice to see that the reporter Gil is talking to has a name that’s just “rumor” with one extra letter. I was afraid that the extremely on-the-nose media parodies would be on-hold while Marty Moon is on the injured/drunk list.
JP: Way to build up suspense that will be dispelled the second Sophie walks in the door.
MW: While the rest of the crowd at the Star Lounge will be divided between those classic numbers “Oh Hey It’s Later Than I Thought I’d Better Get Going” and “I’m Getting My Phone Out to Record This Epic Cringe.”
RMMD: This sounds like the way the cops might be grilling someone if the ME found bullet holes/stab wounds/severe neck bruises on the body, so 50-50 chance the officer is just killing time.
@Lord Flatulence: Then Augie should just tell the cop that accidents will happen.
DtD: Wilson, you old goat…you are the GOAT!
BGSS: Granny Creeps was hoping her new potion would turn her into a seductive siren and Snuffy into a dashing roue after she slipped some into his sassyfrass tea but it obviously backfired.
@Professor Well Actually: #17
No kidding! Can this get any more awkward, not to say tedious?
@Poteet: “Pixie and Dixie”
More of these god damn Confederate monuments. Take ‘em away from Batuik and put them in the Shame Museum. Charge the people a dollar and a half just to see ‘em.
@Liam: #2
But remember…this is “Luann” we’re talking about…
@Banana Jr. 6000: #39
I suspect that these song choices reflect Karen Moy’s own repertoire of pop music being limited to what she believes her readers can relate to. “Beatles.” “Tom Petty.” “Taylor Swift.” “The Carpenters.” etc. My personal choice would have been A3’s “Woke Up This Morning” extended version with the incredible opening narrative.
MT: What the hell has happened to cute, little Kelly Welly?
Another victim of a Jules Rivera makeover.
There’s a DC Comic out called The Snagglepuss Chronicles, in which the cat is a gay Southern playwright living in New York City. He’s a lot like Tennessee Williams, even!
@Daisy: Or “People Are Strange” by The Doors.
@Lord Flatulence:
♪ We are watching the detective
It’s so dull
We are watching the detective
What a numbskull, skull, skull, skull…
@UncleJeff: I kinda LIKE the new Kelly Welly.
LOOK at the black turtleneck sweater. LOOK at her “toss” her hair! She’s EEEEEEEEEVIL.
CRANKSHAFT: At least The Crank didn’t order and receive a caged coyote from a catalog again, which was his worst garden purchase ever. And no, Batty, I won’t hold your beer.
@The Rambling Otter: Huh… I misspelled Endearing quirks as “Enduring Quirks” well, that’s not incorrect but…
@Poteet: Jinks. Thanks. I obviously did not look it up. I don’t remember the cartoons very well.
I did watch Huckleberry Hound and remember liking the show. My favorites when I was ten or eleven were Rocky and Bullwinkle. I got the jokes that were aimed at kids, but it wasn’t until I was much older that I realized that there were two levels to the show, and that much of it went over my head when I was younger.
@The Rambling Otter: #108
Actually, you couldn’t be more right! Reading “Mary Worth” is a test of anyone’s endurance. :-)
@Rats Inyerpants: #104
Very fitting!
Back at the time when all the comics were doing jokes about kids and their genes with holes in them,
did Snuffy do a “Whataya know, Hootin Hallor was ahead of the game!” joke?
Wait Till Your Crankshaft, until your Crankshaft, Wait till your Crankshaft gets home!
@I speak Jive: Personally, with Rocky and Bullwinkle, I’m just a sucker for the old style serials format, where each arc is broken up into many episodes and each one usually ends on a cliffhanger.
If snuffy took the potion, would it even do anything? As I refuse to believe that he hasn’t been wearing that same hat and overalls since the day he was born.
@The Rambling Otter: Oddly though, despite that. I cannot sit through original Doctor Who. It’s dry as a cracker left in the Sahara desert for a week.
I mean, I respect it for what it is, but I just can’t watch it.
@The Rambling Otter: William Conrad auditioned to read the intros and outros for Rocky and Bullwinkle. He read a script they gave him, and they said he was very good, but could he do it twice as fast? So he did it twice as fast, and they said, now twice as fast as that. So he did that, and they said he was hired.
@Liam: Or oral.
@Lord Flatulence: Or in an autoerotic manner.
1- I apologize, I was very distracted yesterday and forgot to thank Scratchy for the mention.
Thanks Scratchy!
2- I write handwritten videogame guides as a hobby, one game had a location called Westown. Half the times I would write down Westown I wrote it as “Weston” so… Wilbur is apparently trapped in my subconscious, thanks Mary Worth…
@I speak Jive: I really liked R&B too. And one reason was the feeling that R&B assumed I knew more than I actually knew. That made me feel like I was in with the in crowd:-).
@Ukulele Ike: The scenes where Lancaster puked up salt water and Kerr kept finding sand in her bathing suit for weeks afterwards must have wound up on the cutting room floor.
@Ukulele Ike: I liked the previous Kelly Welly because she was such a nuisance to the stuffy Mark Trail…..even when she wasn’t doing anything to block him from doing his job.
@UncleJeff: Kelly might just be a nuisance to Mark in the new incarnation, whether she’s trying to or not. I quit the godawful new Mark Trail a year ago, but I may check in again to follow EEEVIL Kelly.
@TheDiva: Deb would have also wanted that beach showerhead to rinse off the Burt Squirt.
@Daisy: They say that B-Wad is one bad motha…shut yo mouth….
@Lord Flatulence: Or oral.
Or handjobs. Or titfucking. Or phonesex. Or cheating on each other with different people. Or having a threeway where he only comes inside the other girl. But the joke is they’re gonna do it in the back seat. Her back seat. Her rear end, booty, derriere, bum, tush, butthole, rump, caboose, pooper, badonkadonk – shall I go on? Anal sex. That’s the joke. Buttsex. ‘Cause she’s gonna give it up to him, doggie style and in the wrong hole. Hyuk, hyuk, hyuk. Hilarious, huh?
Granny Creeps is gonna send that one in to Pluggers.
@Poteet: World? The rest of the world is united against the USA
BG&SS – The only way Granny understood youth culture is if the mailman Uriah was to have delivered some junk mail catalog into town. Clearly this deserves a literal curse on him for corrupting the downhome value of Hootin’ Holler.
Dennis the Menace – This feels like a miscast strip. Margaret would deliver the first setup, and Dennis would do the punchline.
Crankshaft – We already know the Burnings are going to happen, and when that goes down Pam is only going to survive because Ed’s collection of yard equipment and Beans End seeds provide the means to subsistence agriculture, and the collection of culture saved in physical form by her husband’s collecting will provide a means of entertainment at the movie theater that won’t die.
Luann – They should have read the small print on their admissions tickets. All children conceived on the park grounds (including parking lot and bathroom stalls) are property of the park.