Inside ball
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Phantom, 8/10/25
One of Phantom‘s many charms is its meticulous attention to aviation history. That doomed B-17F Flying Fortress is the Miss Nonalee II, captured and looted by the Luftwaffe at at the end of 1943, then repainted with German markings for clandestine operations. Phantom’s raceplane is F-ANPY, one of two de Havilland DH.88 Comets sold to the French and last seen in poor condition at Étampes, France, on 16 June 1940, the day the Germans invaded. So these particular aircraft could plausibly have wound up in this Phantom timeline.
But I’m worried about the Walkers’ marriage. Look at the guy, fully suited up at breakfast, pecking at his miserable egg and millet with his mind clearly on work, no eye contact (no eyes!), cryptic communications, keeping secrets until there’s no turning back yikes. And “Remove the …? !!–the canopy!?” sounds to me like Phantom will indeed be flying with Diana tonight, but she’ll be landing all alone.
Next: New Adventure—Savarna Comforts the Ghost-Who-Grieves
Crankshaft, 8/10/25
Plenty of local detail here to justify a sweet tax deduction for the author’s “research” trip to Winnipeg: mascot Boomer there, Coach O’Shea’s beard, and #86 wide receiver Kennans Clercius. The embedded joke is that this is an actual stunt play that could work to shake off tight coverage: the slot back moves before the snap to misdirect defenders; QB hands the ball off to the slot back, who hands to Clercius, who flips to the running back, who throws to the QB. The curl “sluggo” (slant-and-go) route is a misdirect by the split end to open a seam for the QB to run through after the catch. It works in Canadian football because pre-snap motion (the “waggle”) is permitted and the field is wider, so there’s time and space to spread out the defenders.
But the funny part is seeing the Crankshaft frog-marched off to prison, just like the author will be once the IRS learns that Boomer’s #00 jersey is gold, not blue. Hey, it would work in Slylock Fox and Dick Tracy, why not here?
Luann, 8/10/25
Ha, ha, the DA pushed for “intent to defraud” and Brad didn’t plead out. Saved seventy-eight cents; got five years. So I ask: is a year of Brad’s life really worth sixteen cents? Let’s have a reader poll!
Dustin, 8/10/25
“Paparazzi, Fitch? What about that guy in the corner with the sketch pad and colored pencils? He thinks I don’t see him, but I do … always. My life is not my own. You think it’s the camera that makes paparazzi intrusive?”
—Uncle Lumpy
147 replies to “Inside ball”
Phantom:
Devil appears to be staring off-panel for cues rather than paying the remotest attention to his master — you know, just like Lassie used to do with Timmy on the old TV show.
MW:
“Lucius! The barn’s on fire! The barn’s on fire!”
— Emperator Nero Claudius Caesar Augusts Germanicus, d/b/a “Emperor Nero”
Six Chix-That’s the joke.
MW-Mary is giving off lots of creepy groomer vibes in this story.
MW-“And here’s to avoiding a list.”
RMMD-“Now then how much money do you need?”
Slylock Fox-Slylock’s extensive knowledge of armor was used to determine it was the armor on the left.
FC-“And here is where we will have a red wedding.”
Luann-And it took a fox and his mouse sidekick to bring Brad down.
Speaking as a Canadian, I have never seen a literal “Mountie” in my life.
I see cops in typical cop uniforms. But never a Mountie, and security at a football stadium would wear, you know, standard stadium security uniforms. Right?
…I forgot to mention, hahaha Crankshaft is finally being arrested for being the horrible person that he is!
MW:
The last panel’s “CLINK” is appropriate onomatopoeia for where they should be throwing both Mary and Olive.
@The Rambling Otter:
Wait a minute — you’re telling me that “Sergeant Preston of the Yukon” wasn’t real?
MW:
“In other words, Olive, just keep being and acting weird, and your problems will solve themselves!”
@Bob Tice: Like that Doctor Who episode, where he insists the schizophrenic kid in the class (temporarily) not take her meds because they block psychic waves that they need her to read to save the day. Or something like that, can’t fully remember.
Edit: It’s even weirder actually, she hears voices when off of her meds, but the voices she hears at that moment are actually the earth’s trees trying to tell them something and The Doctor wants the girl to tell him what they are saying. Because it’s crucial for the survival of earth.
Yeah…
CS: Ed Crankshaft is the first time that Canadians unanimously voted in favor of the death penalty.
Dustin: Your life sucks, Dustin, but at least you can say that you’re not Fitch.
MW: Olive is bullied by her classmates, ignored by her parents, thinks she has “unique gifts,” and her best friend is a creepy old woman who refers to them as “kindred spirits.” She’s going to make a therapist very, very rich one day.
MW: I can’t wait for Mary to take a page out of Wilbur’s book and reveal to Olive that she remembered her pocketbook but she forgot her debit card and now her “kindred spirit” has to pay for the meal. Oops!
Mary Worth Mashup: One little speech bubble changed…
Slylock: A happy Max looks at the small suit of armor. “Bugger me, will ya!”
Mutts: Rookie mistake, McDonnell. If you’re referencing Popeye, it’s ‘I yam what I yam’. ‘I am what I am’ references La Cage aux Folles.
Dustin: Today’s depiction of a bar scene with men and women happily interacting serves to assure the readers that the actual number of involuntary celibate males in society has not reached the dangerous levels the comic sometimes implies.
CSh: Non-Canadian readers might assume that it’s the Royal Canadian Mounted Police that is escorting Ed off the field, but check the uniforms: more purple than scarlet. No, that’s the infamous Matheson Marauders, a paramilitary outfit established by the Blue Bombers to deal with ageing American interlopers.
@The Rambling Otter: Also, Winnipeg has City of Winnipeg police force with ordinary navy blue uniforms, the RCs wouldn’t be involved. Yet another reason to reject the artist’s tax write-off!
CS: Would have preferred to see this story played out during the Stanley Cup finals. All those sticks, Ed’s bare head.
RMMD: Nice pasties you got there, Truck.
RMMD: “Uncle Cody? What kinda weird name is that? Doesn’t even start with a L!”
JP Sit down and discuss misunderstandings? Is that allowed?
@CanuckDownSouth: Yeah, you get Mounties in full dress uniform at the Grey Cup, but not ordinary games.
@Hibbleton: I thought you were going to say his ass.
Jasper Beardsly: Interrupt a coaching session? That’s a paddlin’
@lynn: “I am what I am” references YWH, or the LORD, the desert trickster god of Moses and the Israelites.
Dustin: I would very much enjoy Dustin sailing to the edge of the world, Truman Show-style, only to discover the role of Christof played by Ed. Or he could drown. Drowning would be good too.
Dustbin – Try to be a bit more consistent, Dustin. There’s no way Fitch would know the word “paparazzi” and not think it’s a pizza topping.
Don Abundio, translated:
“Don Abundio says we need six lobsters”
“Are there six in there?”
“I’ll count them…”
“No. Only five”
May I just say I am in awe of Uncle Lumpy’s command of obscure detail? If ever a man deserved a deduction for a research trip to Winnipeg to fact-check a cartoonist’s deduction for a research trip to Winnipeg, it’s you, Lumpy!
SF: Did an amusement park kill Ces’ dog or sainted mother or something? This is laying it on thick even for him.
JP: Speaking of laying it on thick, Reena has officially graduated into the pantheon of insane, insufferable JP characters. Now, let’s watch as this story gets even stupider as it’s revealed that Leah is actually one of the *good* CIA people who was sent to Norway (with Askel as her contact) to keep an eye on Pavel Jr. in the hopes of nailing him for crimes until CIApril came barging in and screwed everything up at the coffee house, and then these two nitwits came barreling back into her safe house and started smashing up the furniture. Yes, you did ensure your deaths, Reena, because Leah’s going to have to kill you not because she’s some insane murderer, but just to shut you up and allow her to focus on finding CIApril and the Macguffin flash drive.
Thanks to Lumpy for shattering my illusion that, with forever stamps, that I was paying only about 50 cents per stamp. I feel like a Plugger.
MW: “CHEERS!” [Clink!] Mary and Olive proceed to down their ice cream sundaes in a single gulp.
@29 The Quiet Man: Ces grew up in the 70’s and 80’s, watching commercials for [Tr]Action Park. It was well-known for unsafe rides that caused many many injuries. I recognized this park immediately upon its introduction to the strip.
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV:
Second prize is two trips to Winnipeg!
CS: Meanwhile, Jeff has changed his flight back to Ohio.
Luann: In response to the poll: no. As far as the strip goes, I’m unhappy we’re going to find out what the Evanses think about “conjugal visits.”
Dustin: Fitch thinks Paparazzi is a Mafia hit man.
@Baja Gaijin: Nope. Nope. Nope.
FC: Awww, look at them using their imaginations, like little imaginators.
Zits: I feel like the colorist did this strip dirty.
MW: “Mary?” “Yes, dear?” “Why do you always talk in platitudes?” {Mary dumps sundae on Olive’s head}
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV: YWH is ‘I am who am’. Not to be confused with ‘The Ham What Am’ (Armour)
9CL: Hooray, its (another) thesaurus day for 9 Chickweed Lane!
Luann :
a) Look, we shouldn’t do things like assign a monetary value to the life of Brad DeGroot
because ANY amount is going to feel like an overchargeb) Is it just me, or is this more “fantastic” than the strip usually is? Like, I feel this strip is usually more “grounded, down-to-Earth slice-of-life”, in a way that this “smash cut to the characters in prison” punchline feels out-of-place?
Crankshaft: Service above and beyond the call of duty. That’s how these Mounties–heroes, really–are given the privilege of guarding the Grey Cup on November 16th right there in Winnipeg.
Beetle Bailey: Sure, Beetle seems smart now, but wait til Sarge signs up for the Babbel course in physical altercation loopholes.
Zits: “I hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me” thinks Jereny’s friend.
@The Rambling Otter: But that’s the twist in this arc: That isn’t a a real cop. Just a Canadian-themes stripper taking Crankshaft to get a private lap dance.
@2+2=7: Please step over here for a pat-down, sir.
@Anonymous: If Seinfeld can do it, why not Luann too?
@The Rambling Otter:
@Hibbleton: I thought you were going to say his ass.
An ass paddling would be cute. And ‘cute’ is the last thing I associate with Crank.
@Baja Gaijin:
Yup. Once in a simpler and more innocent time this conversation would be harmless but today MW is looking at 20 years !
@I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV:
Mortals: God, what are you?
God: I am what I am!
Mortals: But what IS that…? you’ve given us zero hints aside from being an omnipotent being.
God: Yes, I am an omnipotent being.
Mortals: But what IS that? Your appearance and personality differ between bibles, you apparently look like a human but are said to at the same time be everything and anything. And sometimes you’re pure good other times you’re depicted as angry and smiteful.
God: I’ll never tell -winks-
C’shaft: I assume the stereotypical Mountie uniform is something only worn for formal or ceremonial occasions, similar to the “dress blues” of a US Marine. That said, finally bringing Ed Crankshaft to justice is something that I think deserves a little bit of pomp and circumstance.
Phantom: The Phantom’s utter commitment to his Ghost-Who-Walks persona has always weirded me out. Most characters with a secret identity have at least one or two people who they let in on it: significant other, plucky sidekick, loyal manservant, etc. But this guy won’t even appear to his own wife and children unmasked (note: in the world of this comic, dark sunglasses or a band of shadow across the eyes apparently counts as being “masked”). Like, how did Diana, a woman who if memory serves is a UN diplomat with a cosmopolitan background, look at this guy who would never take his Ray-Bans off around her and say, “Yes, I want to spend the rest of my life in a cave with this man”? Did the kids ever freak out around him when they were babies? Has any Phantom ever been forced to off his own kin because they happened to catch him without some token form of concealment on his face? Does that tiny little eye mask ever actually fool anyone?
Hoping this is the beginning of a Kind Hearts and Coronets-style rampage where TJ tricks every character into doing crimes, until the entire strip is him visiting them in prison to gloat and then playing with his cat.
@matt w: Dogs may be great, but cats are nice (to be around, I mean, because really cats are kind of jerks at times but one can’t help but love them)
Edit: I forgot to finish my comment.
Maybe Les’s cat can come and hang out, but not Les. Because he’ll be in prison.
In today’s Garfield, we learn that the front door opens outward, which makes it much easier for a prowler to get inside.
@lynn: WHAM is the ham what am. (Blandings Mr.)
Wait, wait, wait… we joked about TJ being gay (and he probably is) but this trickster attitude mixed with that is giving me heavy Gregg from Night in the Woods vibes.
Except TJ isn’t a reformed criminal. (That we know of)
And he’s not an anthropomorphic fox.
(Actually, using underhanded means to put innocent people behind bars, he might as well be…)
The Phantom: I will admit that the image of Phantom eating breakfast with his family like a normal dude while clad in his superhero outfit is pretty unironically funny.
Crankshaft: It seems like Crankshaft is becoming the NFL’s equivalent to Gearhead Gertie, which means he’ll soon be carrying out terrorist attacks against other sports and driving his wife to the the brink of madness. Fun!
Dustin: Something weird that just dawned on me. The whole premise of Dustin is that he’s stuck living with his parents and teenage(?) sister. And yet the comic also constantly depicts him as going out on the dating scene, trying and failing to get laid. Assuming he doesn’t intend to go to the girls’ own homes (that seems like too sane and progressive for a newspaper comic like this), the implication would seem to be that he plans to bring these dates back home with him, which opens a whole crazy can of worms implying Dustin thinks he’ll be having sex with women he picked up at the bar right in his family’s house in front of his dad, mom, and sister, with no issue. Might give some context on why Dustin’s attempts at dating always fail.
Than again, an equally likely possibility is that the writer of Dustin is so out-of-touch with other human beings and hyper-conservative that he genuinely doesn’t realize that “trying to meet women at the bar” implies an attempt at casual sex and not waiting-til-marriage-and-only-to-make-kids chastity.
@Anonymous: It’s not just you–this is way out of line with the tone the strip usually tries to strike. While the government does take the mail seriously, this kind of thing wouldn’t even get Brad a slap on the wrist, because no AUSA would take a case this piddly to court.
@ectojazzmage: Or he’s old-fashioned enough that he thinks that people still do the “get a hotel room for the night” thing when they hook up at a bar.
JP: Well, in the sense that your landlady will be so offended by you snooping around and accusing her of murder that she’ll throw you out on the street where you’ll quickly freeze to death as winter comes to Norway, sure.
MT: Okay, Mark, are golf courses scourges to the ecosystem that destroy habitat and poison the water, or are they harmless recreational spaces we need to keep clear of invasive poisonous amphibians? We need to work on the messaging here.
MW: I’m starting to think Mary’s relationship with Olive is less that of a sexual predator and more that of a cult leader (yes, there is a lot of overlap between the two, but stay with me here). Mary encouraging Olive to think of herself as “special” with a unique “inner light” and other vaguely spiritual woo, Olive declaring that Mary “saved her from despair” and insisting “no one understands me like you do”…this kid is a short push away from drinking cyanide-spiked Kool-Aid or going on a Beatles-inspired murder spree.
RMMD: “Hello, concrete evidence that my father was a dirty rotten cheater, a fact which has completely upended my perception of him! It’s so wonderful to finally meet you!”
You know one thing I’ve never seen in person as a Canadian? Mounties in their Red Serge. I’ve seen plenty of the RCMP cops on duty, they’re just the police in plenty of jurisdictions. Even as someone who doesn’t care for sports I’ve been to a couple of CFL games. I’ve still never seen the Red Serge in person. Also, Winnipeg has their own police force, they don’t use the RCMP. But I get wanting your comic strip with a trip to Canada wanting to use some visual cues to remind readers that your main character is visiting an exotic foreign land.
This week’s Mary Worth brainyquote is BUSTED. Busted, busted, busted! It appears on p. 36 of From Me To You: A Gift Of Friendly Thoughts compiled by Edwin Osgood Grover (1911), but it is unattributed while the next aphorism is attributed to Seneca. Surely the correct attribution is to Grover! I don’t think I believe Grover’s attribution of the next quote either but that is… ah, who am I kidding.
@taig: After reading that horrible prose on his daughter’s substack (just why does a puppeteer have one?) someone linked yesterday, you can see the pretentiousness that seeped throughout the household.
@ectojazzmage: The strip would have us believe that Dustin is perpetually single because he’s a loser, and to be fair his behavior towards women leaves a great deal to be desired. But even assuming he met someone who is not turned off by his own International Worker’s Day parade of red flags, sooner or later she would have to be introduced to his family, an event which I’m sure would kill any prospect of a long-term relationship.
Dustin: Would Fitch do better with women if he went solo? He couldn’t do worse.
Blondie: Dagwood’s subscription to his John Deere ran out. That’s why Pluggers have been using the same Montgomery Ward mower since 1966.
MW: Any more topper panels about Olive’s enemies thinking she’s weird and Comics Kingdom will pay Moy and Brigman more to not do them.
DT: The loan shark and the muscle entertain deadbeat lady lesbian death ray scientists with empty beer cans and Chinese food containers all over the coffee table? C’mon guys, didn’t your mommas raise you better than that?
Zits – Panel 2 adds a whole new kinky dimension to Jeremy’s Oedipus complex.
Luann – Brad’s not in jail for mail fraud. He held up a liquor store because when Toni’s aunt got the card with postage due, he quickly concluded that jail would be a safer space than at home with Toni.
Wrecks Moregone:
The only reason I don’t claim that Lorna or whatever her name is cheated her husband with Wrecks is that her kids have medium dark skin. Otherwise they look and behave *exactly* like Moregone spawn would.
Phantom: WTF is wrong with this marriage or this flight?
“Remove the canopy.”
Do you have any freaking idea how windy it’ll be without the canopy, let alone how far less aerodynamic the plane will be without the canopy? Just imagine any charts/navigational maps or aids disappearing down the runway on takeoff. And his won’t notice this when she hops onboard?
I hope the Phantom, his wife, and his dog, all have parachutes, as he plans to recreate the ill-fated fatal mission the mysterious men embarked upon long ago.
The Phantom and his cute puppy were down in a slave mine a few days ago. How did they get back to civilization so quickly without instigating a full out revolt and prisoner escape once word got out about “marked men?”
@Anonymous: I guess when you’re a
badasssuperhero, everything has to be EXTREME!!!!@Tom: it’s the old “tearing the tag off a mattress is a federal crime” joke.
@ValdVin: “Jeremy’s Mom has got it going on…”
@UncleJeff: Two steps below the “repeal the Law of Gravity” joke.
DT: Glad to see that the gang have fun when they are without DT. I spy with my little a clue!
RMMD: Cody is going to get swarmed by the kids demanding piggyback rides.
Crankshaft: the whole red coated mountie is just a bit for the cartoon – in usual life, they don’t wear the red tunics and hats; they were probably part of some flag ceremony or half time show.
JP: Classic – everyone is part of the conspiracy! Please let the woman be actually a villain and Aksel is an undercover Norwegian cop tracing the missing owner. OR, let Aksel and the woman be in cahoots and end both of the dim girls – missing one frame: we see the girls back towards the bureau and the woman and Aksel closing in – fade to black.
Phantom: Recently there was a surprise hit movie, Sinners, which not to spoil things does involve the supernatural and the undead. Our Phantom has modern features: he does a lot of stalking at night, and is weirdly creepy dressing in clearly out of date and inappropriate garb (Dracula’s evening dress and cape) but is modern enough to use a plane (like in Stephen Kings short story/novella – Nightflier)
@Tabby Lavalamp: We had a tragedy a couple of decades ago where two police officers died in the line of duty.
There was a very large, uniformed police gathering outside the church where the funerals were being held.
A few minutes before the procession, a unit of the RCMP showed up.
They were attending the Minnesota State Fair and were obviously selected (men & women) for how good they looked on horses and in full dress uniform.
Their commander politely asked where they should go and throughout the line of officers, you could see the cops nudging each other and read their lips as they stage-whispered “MOUNTIES!’
Well, now might be a good time for Cody’s band to do a Guns’n roses cover “whoa oh oh sweet child of Spuds”. Seriously, a week ago we thought this storyline would drag on forever, now we’re crying because it looks like it’s finally gonna be over. I just wonder if at any time during this whole ordeal Wanda was ever close to telling Truck to kiss her grits?
PV: “Aleta smiles gamely and hikes her gown”.
Val says “That’s great. Now, move the damn knife”.
@UncleJeff:
Princess of the renaissance fair: Would thee like to take a gander up my frock?
Peter Griffin: Okay… whatever floats your boat (grabs a duck and shoves it up her dress)
SF: The amusement park arc was actually funny. Congratulations.
@Anonymous: There are lots of songs they could do, but only within the boundries of the comic.
“WE WILL… WE WILL… BORE YOU!”
“BLUNDER!!!!”
” I WANT TO TALK AND BE DULL ALL NIGHT…”
Dustin: Notice how the artist was careful not to break the color barrier in the bar scene. C’mon, guys. It’s the 21st Century. It’s not like all the Southern newspapers are going to drop your strip because you depicted an interracial couple.
Amazing back stories for PHANTOM and CS today, Uncle Lumpy. Thanks!
@73 Anonymous: I don’t think Wanda’s ever tell Truck to “kiss her grits” as he’s the only man who has, and will.
By the way, in the DT strip today, look at the apartment buzzer board (right upper frame). It lists as other tenants: A Bierce (Ambrose Bierce), A. Earheart (Amelia Earheart), and JR Crater (Judge Crater) all famous Americans who vanished suddenly.
CS: RCMP fun fact: Actor Leslie Nielsen’s Danish born father, Ingvard Nielsen, was a Mountie.
@Activist:
Here is a scale model of the Nonalee II in German drag, from a German modelling club.
@treetown: The quiz show answer would be that all three vanished mysteriously. Whereas Sphryna’s murdered corpse is right across town in the police morgue with a tag on the toe.
This is typical of Costello’s work: he cuts a very fine line between clever and stupid.
@Uncle Lumpy:
In the Slylock world, if Lizards were wearing to promote fashion. Would they be “scale models”?
MT: OH. MY. GAWD. Mark, you amazing ignoramus, it is ILLEGAL repeat ILLEGAL to “relocate” cane toads in Florida!! There are (totally justified) state regulations against it! This has got to be a new low in your new-MT career.
I’ve got some sad news for you, Jules, oops, I mean Mark. Sit down and here’s a hankie. First, there is no Tooth Fairy. Second, when it comes to invasive exotic animals, sometimes the animals must be killed. They cannot be “relocated” because, to list just one reason, no other locations in North America want the invasive exotic animals either. They cannot be returned to their continent of origin, even if that were remotely financially or logistically feasible, because they’d carry a whole new North-America-acquired collection of pathogens and parasites with them that would do awful things in their continent of origin. They. Must. Be. Killed. In the case of cane toads, they can and should be killed humanely, and there are ways to do that, but die they must.
And if you cannot face the biological realities of invasive exotic species, Mark, pleeeease talk about other topics instead. My nervous system isn’t young anymore. Maybe go back to baby beavers named Lucky.
@treetown: D B Cooper!
Luann — “Sixteen cents?” Put me down for “No. But given the “jail cell” looking as though it fits in the corner of the apartment I think there’s some weird role-playing sex stuff going on here. . .
@treetown: I’m trying to remember. Was JR Crater the guy who vanished off of the airplane mid-flight, while one person would not be strong enough to open the doors, meaning if someone pushed him out there would have been two killers, and the plane made a weird pitstop on a beach for seemingly no reason shortly after. (To name a few bizarre notes)
(Looked it up, it was Alfred Loewenstein)
@86 Poteet: Which comics strip-related frustration irks you more: Mark Trail’s/Jules’ ignorance of nature or June Morgan’s hair worm?
@87 But What Do I Know?: It’s the former creepy fuck tent from the dormitory.
RMMD: Lorna, Lonnie, Larry, and Lorry. I had to go back a day to check Lorna’s name. As weird as it is, the weirder one I knew in real life was where all the kids had the same initial as one parent but not the other.
SPECIAL INFORMATION FOR BAJA GAIJIN!
Don’t read tomorrow’s (Monday) Bizarro.
@ValdVin: #61: re-Dustin: Good point. Fitch has already been represented as someone who does hold down a regular job and has his own place. If he just lowered his standards and quit going after women way out of his league he’d probably get lucky on occasion.
@NotGregEvans: Their last name is Lowenstein, they live in Lackawanna, and they sell ladyfingers.
Luann-The important thing to remember is to not drop the soap.
“I’ll be flying with you,Diana, this is Red Bull™ I’m drinking, I finally got an endorsement deal! (Takes another sip) “Yummy!! Red Bull™ gives you wings!!!!”
This is the first time I’ve seen the Dustin logo panel, and it depicts Dustin as the only member of the family not distracted by a phone or anything of the like on their way out the door, instead enjoying a nourishing breakfast. Are we sure this comic is actually making fun of its title character?
@96 Morgan Wick:
Oh, they’re making fun of Dustin because they’re showing he’s the only one with enough time on his hands to sit down and enjoy a leisurely breakfast.
@Bob Tice: #7: He was, in a way. I used to work with a guy who when serving in the Army in the 50s, was stationed at a NORAD installation in the Canadian Arctic. Whenever they got to go on leave they’d go to the nearest town big enough to have bars and hookers. The local miners and lumberjacks also went there to blow their paychecks and let off some steam. The streets were patrolled by a hulking Mountie the size of an NFL linebacker who carried a nightstick the size of a Louisville Slugger and was always in the company of a humongous guard dog. Not even the burliest drunken lumberjack dared start any shit around him.
@91 Sequitur: Thanks for the heads-up.
@98 Guillermo el Chiclero: So this Mountie was was the opposite of The Ghost Who Walks and The Dog Who Trots.
@Uncle Lumpy:
#83. Nice model crafts, but why do they all have a banana bandage on their butt?
The Familliar Mucus: “Watch out, I’ll fill the moat!” Jeffy shouts as he starts to pull his pants down.
@Baja Gaijin: The Ghost Who Walks and The Dog Who Trots.
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To be fair, Devil only trots after Skull cave Mystery Meat Taco Thursdays.
DUSTIN: Is that a lunch place? Or is that a bar? A daytime bar? Or is it one of those social refreshment places attached to certain bookstores? How old are those people supposed to be? For that matter, how old is Dustin supposed to be? He and his buddy(?) look younger than the others, right? What does “Fitch” mean, as a nickname? Or is that his real name?
I don’t know if Dustin and Fitch have peaked, but it seems clear that I peaked some time ago.
@Baja Gaijin: Thanks for asking. It’s always the one I happen to be looking at.
@Peanut Gallery: I like the lobster ‘s little “Hi Mom” wave to the audience.
Nice of Mark Trail to point out the Southern toad ‘s oval sack.
@Baja Gaijin: Wow. That Wiki piece is quite a skim.
Mary Worth – She dragged out the platitudes, but the rest of the conversation is still creepy.
@Bob Tice: I saw Sgt Preston in person when I was around six years old. The actor who played him, Richard Simmons (a different one) was the guest star at the circus that came to Harrisburg every year. He talked to a kid in the audience and said that the kid’s father was probably a bum. The kid replied that the was the Governor. I don’t remember if Yukon King was there.
On a trip to Alaska around ten years ago, we went into the Yukon territory. On the bus, our guide showed a few episodes of Sgt. Preston of the Yukon. In one episode, Sgt. Preston got into a fight with a criminal and was knocked out, and when he regained consciousness his uniform was spotless, and his hair wasn’t mussed. In Dawson City Mr. Jive had the Sourtoe Cocktail, but I didn’t.
@Baja Gaijin: Mashup – There isn’t enough brain bleach in the world.
@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: Forever stamps always cost whatever the current postage is. However, they’re still good when rates increase. If you have any of those Liberty Bell stamps that cost around 48¢, you can still use them.
@The Rambling Otter: (Looked it up, it was Alfred Loewenstein)
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Gene Wilder: “That’s LoewenSTEEN!”
What A Frazzhole!: So now Frazzhole is going on vacation with the kids?!? Is that better or worse then him just hanging out with them in general?
@Ukulele Ike: @NotGregEvans: Their last name is Lowenstein, they live in Lackawanna, and they sell ladyfingers.
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….and their beer is Löwenbräu.
Let it be Löwenbräu
©2025 Löwenbräu Breweries Inc.
Dustin – We live in an age where bars struggle due to more people staying in, struggling financially, and unable to socialize. Dusting’s “peak” of having a good friend to hang out with in a lively bar full of interesting , happy and sociable patrons is other people’s Everest. His family may suck, but there is a health community around him he could put his energy into.
@I speak Jive:
I don’t recall that particular episode. What I do recall about that show, though, is that there were all sorts of scenes ostensibly taking place outside in the frigid Arctic air, but there was never any steam breath coming out of the mouths of Preston and whomever was interacting with him.
@Philip: We live in an age where bars charge fifteen bucks for a SHOT AND A BEER. If a bar is struggling they could figure out a way not rip off possible patrons. It’s possible that the American bar as a Third Place comparable to a British pub, a German bierstube, or a French cafe is a thing of the past.
@Baja Gaijin:
Do we have to pick one that is more irksome, or can it be a tie?
@Ukulele Ike: Part of the Dustin creators never thinking anything through is that there never seems to be any explanation as to why the perpetually unemployed Dustin can afford to go to expensive looking bars more than the average young person with a job can.
Yea,Six Chix! A Setup and a good punchline! I knew you had it in you! Literal pieces of toast for everyone! Congrats!
@113 Bob Tice: The show is actually factual in that regard. Breath steaming happens in when the air is full of water (i.e. high relative humidity). The air can be so saturated with water can’t take more water from your breath. The relative humidity is low in the winter in the Yukon and into central Alaska. You can make like the Big Bad Wolf and huff and puff all day long in the Yukon with no steam produced.
@115 Bob Tice: I guess the answer could be “both.”
After Ed is hauled off by the cartoon Mounties, the judge at his hearing pretty much HAS to be an Eskimo. Or a polar bear. Am I right, Canadians?
C-Shaft: I’ll be charitable and assume that Batiuk is making a joke and doesn’t think that the RCMP do routine sports stadium security. Not that it’s a great improvement but it’s a little better.
Dustin: If it’s any comfort the guy in the yellow shirt won’t score either once the lady notices him playing pocket pool.
Luann: TJ is standing in the same position and wearing the same shirt and pants. The only way this could more obviously be a cutaway gag is if he still had the energy drink in one hand.
Phantom: Judging by the décor of his room the pilot that Stripey hired is a college freshman or at most sophomore.
Doesn’t Luann take place in California? Brad wouldn’t see any real time for anything less than murdering a bunch of orphans and the nuns watching them.
DtM: If Joey’s mom and Alice Mitchell are in the same coven and are both adept at scrying, that would be an interesting development, and thus it’s no surprise that nothing like that has been shown on-panel.
JP: “If I wanted you dead I could just ask Oliver Warbucks to disappear your asses.”
MW: I appreciate that they got a little bit wacky with the lettering by putting a lowercase “i” in the middle of the “CLINK” of the ice cream cups. Of course maybe it’s just for fear that an all-caps CLINK would break the glass.
RMMD: Everyone in the family has a name starting with “L” so I assume they’re collectively gunning for a supporting role in Superman.
@Artist formerly known as Ben: The Evanses have some standards. They don’t want to be compared to Intelligent Life.
@A Grave Mind: #119: Eskimo or polar bear, will he be wearing a powdered wig?
@Artist formerly known as Ben: Karen and June didn’t want Diane Morgan suing them.
@Rube: I always figured Dustin goes through Ed’s pockets after he falls asleep.
Late Thread Cuisine: I found a recipe with both ham and pepperoni! No Jell-O or aspic! No olives in any form!
@Bob Tice: No breath steam? That means they had all been replaced by The Thing.
@taig: Heh, good point.
Dustin and his even more lameass friend will have a few more 7 dollar Miller Lites and go home, possibly picking up a six on the way. Korn, Type O Negative, and, I dunno, My Chemical Romance will experience a sudden burst in royalties.
@Baja Gaijin: Did the ham and pepperoni turn green too?
@Guillermo el Chiclero:
With a tall, cool, refreshing glass of maple syrup on the bench.
@Baja Gaijin: Looks like Caldo verde, the national soup of Portugal and Brazil! That’s some Good Shit!
I make it with lacinato kale and kielbasa, which is more to my taste than linguica or chorizo.
@Anonymous: In Phantom, the Sunday strip and the weekday strips are different stories; this is a holdover from the days when newspapers would sometimes only run a comic on Sundays but not on the weekdays, or vice-versa.
@127 Baja Gaijin:
Shrek’s favorite!
And he’s welcome to it.
@122 Artist formerly known as Ben:
I like your CLiNK theory.
Tomorrow’s Judge Parker. It’s the same as today’s but done more concisely in two panels.
@Poteet: As I read Trail’s instructions, I said “Yep. Poteet is going to have something to say about this.” It’s just so stupid. Save the golf courses but forget about any damage to the of environment of the “new” home.
PV: “The knife, stupid. Pay attention to the goddamn knife!” Still, that’s got to be a really uncomfortable place to store one.
@131 taig: Must have. I can’t locate ’em in the photo.
@133 Ukulele Ike: Caldo verde doesn’t look like green upchuck.
@135 Sequitur: Agreed.
@136 Sequitur: My theory is they didn’t want to risk Col. Wilhelm Klink arising from the dead.
@Poteet: It was just a few months ago that I learned the garbagemen in Hi & Lois were named Abercrombie and Fitch. Wouldn’t be a total surprise if one of them had an unacknowledged son in Dustin.
PHANTOM: He actually likes wearing that tight perpetually-stinky purple getup, doesn’t he. It’s not a matter of practicality or necessity. He LIKES it. Ewwwwwww. Also, that little purple pointy bit next to the cheekbone is one of the most affected costume features I’ve seen in the comics. You are weird, Ghost Who Walks. Yes, I do realize that those of us who are hooked on GASOLINE ALLEY are following a strip so dumb that it doesn’t even have any interesting historical content about aircraft, etc. That puts it below THE PHANTOM, and I wouldn’t argue otherwise. But Phantom, you are still weird.
@Ukulele Ike: @Baja Gaijin:
I’d try it, especially heated up after dragging in exhausted from work on a snowy night. Similar to wedding soup McDonalds sold in Pittsburgh for only one season. Servings needed to be larger! And include a crust of bread.
LUANN: It looks to me as if Bwad has already put on weight in prison, and he is presumably working out. When he gets released, he’s going to make certain that TJ’s teeth will never look so pretty again.
These Phantom and Crankshaft quips are full of useless details.
About today’s Luann. Notice the number on Brad’s prison garb. It’s the launch date of the strip.
If anyone else noticed this then good for you!
@JeffMcm: Useless details are among my specialties:-).
@Sequitur: Why, thank you. I was wondering. Bwad looks a little young for that to be his birthday.