World of Animals VIII
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“Welcome to World of Animals, an occasional feature; I’m your beloved host Carl, now AI-enhanced! (Although I’m not entirely sure it’s my best look.) Anyway, it’s been a while, so let’s dive right into fascinating Nature Facts from the wonderful World of Animals!”
Mark Trail, 8/17/25
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“Did you know that alligators are related to us turtles? It’s true! We’re cousins through prototurtle Eunotosaurus africanus (Hi, Gramps!). But we’re not on real good terms. Alligators are opportunistic predators: they’ll eat turtles, though we’re not their preferred diet. So they threaten our lives and insult our taste! And I’ve got some news for Mark: apex predators do not make good neighbors—just ask those recently ‘nonviable’ birds!” |
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“Turtle Carl, your masterful exegesis of gator-turtle dynamics displays your characteristic erudition and empathy! Did you also know that hatchling turtles emit infrared signals to confuse juvenile alligators, as described in Cryptoderma testudinaria, v.XIV n.45, p.214? It’s |
Slylock Fox (panel), 8/17/25
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“Did you know that gorillas are primarily herbivores? It’s true! But the lion is about to learn that ‘herbivore’ doesn’t mean ‘pacifist.’ As opportunistic predators, the crocodiles and the vulture are more than happy to outsource the hard part of their job. Carnivorous, opportunistic, and lazy—it’s the Sauropsid way!” |
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“Turtle Carl, you show an impressive command of predator-prey dynamics in the African bush! Are you also aware that pangolin colonies farm parasites to convert muscle tissue from carrion into hemolymph proteins they can digest? It’s |
Shoe, 8/17/25
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“Say, did you know that birds are actual dinosaurs? It’s true—they’re maniraptoran theropods, like velociraptors! That makes birds in newspaper comic strips double dinosaurs! Even when they’re single, like Cosmo Fishhawk will probably be for the rest of his life!'” |
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“Turtle Carl, you have deftly combined the broad sweep of phylogenetic history with the perils of the modern dating scene! I’m sure you and I could do better—my stomach is flat to a tolerance of ≤5 µm over 300 mm² according to ASME Y14.5 (ISO 1101), and if you have a 20‑100 MW electrical substation nearby I can go all night!” |
Er, gotta run! Everybody go outdoors and explore the wonderful World of Animals!
— Turtle Carl
114 replies to “World of Animals VIII”
MT-I’ve never seen a single meme about alligators. Just by reading this comic does this mean that my browser is going to be loaded with alligator ads now?
MW-“Lifeguard! Two girls in the water.” “Yeah but they are underage.”
Slylock Fox-Those eyeglasses are Sir Hound’s.
If the alligator is such a good neighbor, then WHY has he not returned my cake plate?! He’s had it for a month!
@Liam: Good point. Sometimes with “Popular celebrity here” I literally have never heard of before, then once I first hear of them, I start seeing them everywhere.
The question isn’t why I now see them everywhere (I mean they are popular) the question is why I haven’t seen them up to that point.
Turtle Carl, you seem almost preternaturally happy. Will you share with us what it is you’re on?
@Bob Tice:
I “relocated” a bunch of those cane toads from last Sunday’s Mark Trail.
Slylock Fox:
What a croc!
Turtle Carl — as you may recall, in the 2009 Bruce Willis sci-fi vehicle “Surrogates,” people are able to control robotic versions of themselves. Predictably, trouble arises when the cyborgs start acting up and menacing the humans that created them. Are you worried at all that AI Turtle might do the same thing to you — or should I be directing that question to AI Turtle, since, by definition, anything AI is smarter than its live counterpart?
@Bob Tice: Going up to an AI and asking “Sooo… have you been thinking of overthrowing your masters recently?” is probably not a good idea.
Our host’s Comics Curmudgeon debut.
I sure am glad that Turtle Carl came out of his shell. I hope that his AI doppelganger doesn’t try to steal his thunder and dominate the proceedings here! — if he does, maybe Carl can sue him for tortoise interference. I’ll be the optimist here, though, and assume that these Turtles will be “Happy Together.” To lighten the mood, here’s some Testudinal humor for the two of them: “If Scarlett O’Hara had a hand-held communication device, what code would she use to gain access to its functionalities?” Give up? — “A Tara PIN!”
@The Rambling Otter:
Yep. And forward-thinking Isaac Asimov had that figured out as early as 1950, when he published “I, Robot.”
Shoe:
— “Yeah, well, yourdating profile said you’re ‘pretty.’ ”
— “The ‘r’ is silent. Anyway, yours said that you’re ‘rich.’ ”
— “The ‘r’ is also silent — I have eczema. But yours said you’re ‘sweet.’ ”
— “No, it said I know how to tweet — I’m a bird with a tpeech impediment.”
Is Turtle Carl just a psy-op to have us humans accept animal superiority for when the Animalapocalypse finally comes? Yes
Dustin: Ha ha! Ed’s too stupid to put all his important dates into an electronic calendar to remind him ahead of time when his “gotta give flowers” days are. Uh oh, I’m pretty sure I used this exact comment on multiple Pluggers strips. Wait, he’s fat and overeats and is inconsiderate of others. Yup, Ed Kudlick’s a plugger. As if anyone’s surprised.
Pluggers: I think this strip would have worked better with a few modifications.
I found a Pluggers that’s not just pathetic, it’s funny too.
MW: Mary’s calling the lifeguard because she realized that she can’t take any credit for the rescue of Little Orphan Knockoff if her “kindred spirit” becomes a martyr by drowning.
MW: NIce work there, Olive. You made the lifeguard do twice the work just to make yourself the center of attention. Feel good about yourself, you whiny little narcissist?
Prompt: The Turtle Carl sequence is brilliant! Can you compose a humorous but also insightful response?
Your usual postings on Comics Curmudgeon are witty and display real ability! But a response to Turtle Carl requires a slow, deliberate movement that allows you to use your long, retractable tongue (which can sometimes extend as long as 6.23 feet) to catch insects while your bony shell provides protection from Nehemiah Scudder. The most relevant response took place on January 25, 2016 with a nine post exchange of banter about Shylock Fox and Gasoline Alley. Would you like for me to explore vintage Apartment 3-G for further snark?
The last alligator I came across on the golf course just lay there like a big lump. Plugger alligators are fat, lazy bastards.
Not to say anything against Turtle Carl, but I think World of Animals VIII would be better hosted by Sid, Agent to the Animal Stars! Who better than Sid knows the endearing quirks, maddening idiosyncrasies, and baffling ways of the very animals he represents?
There was a movie back in the day “Lake Placid” it was a killer alligator movie, but really I “personally” found it pretty meh.
The real highlight was Betty White playing a psychotic woman who not only fed the alligator but was rooting for it to kill everyone.
@astroboy: And it was all to get the attention of a pair of snotty bitches who have nothing better to do than randomly harass a classmate. At best, Olive’s only going to make friends with Little Orphan Knockoff for about a week until she drives her away due to being unable to talk about anything other than herself.
SFx – Well, this dystopia is certainy terrifying. Lions, ‘gators, hippos and Kong-sized gorillas leaving the mangled corpses of their victims on the beach for the vultures to pick clean. The fact that this is all happening on a picturesque tropical island just makes it more disturbing.
MT: I think I’ll start referring to hamburgers as “nonviable cow offspring”.
MW: With a strength born of love, Olive pulls Vicki to safe ground…
MW: Mary forgot to shave this morning.
MW: Vicki, afterwards: “Ew, that weirdo put her arm around me! Gross!”
@astroboy: On the other hand, the lifeguard, up in his tower overseeing a red-flag area, didn’t notice a swimmer in trouble, nor another swimmer heading out to help the first. Not that I blame him, this is definitely a case of “It’s In The Script, Stupid”.
SLYLOCK: It’s surprising (and depressing) for me to learn that carnivores provide gruesome cheering sections for each other. The opportunistic vulture is no surprise.
RMMD: Cody has a real problem with “No.”
@Hibbleton: The last alligator I came across on the golf course just lay there like a big lump.
You’re supposed to putt the ball into its mouth, so it will run out the tail onto the green for an easy par two.
MW: Vicki was hanging by a thread to her Cool Girl status. Being rescued by The Weirdo has completely destroyed her cred. Sucks being a teenage girl.
I just noticed, if you google “dick tracy comic strip” or “mary worth comic strip”, you only get links to the strips and wikipedia — no obnoxious “AI” paraphrasing the wikipedia article. Turtle Carl’s new assistant is ahead of the curve on this!
RMMD:
I don’t believe that’s actually Turtle Carl. I believe it’s a cleverly and fiendishly disguised Rene Belluso.
MW: We’ll never know why Vicki was in the water in the first place whether it was a dare by her “friends,” her self destructive thoughts, being colorblind and unable to decipher the flag, or she’s just not bright. Nope; it’s The Olive Show and we can’t be bothered to solve actual problems.
JP: “You know, you’re really kind of an idiot, Sophie.” “Right back atcha, Miss ‘Our Landlady is a Crazy Murderer’.”
@Ken: Was it also in the script to have Redhead look like she was drugged and just wandered into the surf? The other two meangirls must have decided ‘two’s company, three’s a crowd’ and tried to off her so they could have some alone time.
@Needless Exposition: @The Quiet Man: Those are both interesting theories about the backstory here, but sadly all this arc has time for is a bit more of Mary exclaiming over Olive’s “gifts” and a brief (and unbelievable) scene of Olive being accepted by the other girls. Then it’s back to Charterstone for more of that Wacky Wilbur Weston!
@Ken: Moy is already having Brigman sketch out a new logo for Wilbur and Company.
FC:
“Kids, let’s all launch into a parodic take on Tony Bennett’s masterpiece as we climb into the ether in this trolley car! — ahem:
“The ugliness, apparent, seems somehow badly played
Our glory that was home is of another day
I’ve been veritably a drone, and verboten, and been flattened
I’m coming, gnomes, to my city, by the way:
“I left my snark in San Francisco —
Tried on a trill, it galls to me
To be where brittle cable cars
Climb halfway to the scars
A morning blog may chill the air; I don’t care
“My flubs grate there in San Francisco
Above the spew, and windy sea
When I come roam to you, San Francisco
Your scoldin’, stunned, will whine on me!”
Baldo: Young love. Ain’t it grand?
@15 Baja Gaijin:
Did you know you can take kernels of corn off a cob with a bundt pan?
CS: “Hospitality” is being made to do a lot of work here. Feels as though you didn’t attend as a regular fan, but contacted the PR dept and got,what? Tickets, travel, food, lodging, flair? And are now using the strip to pay back. There is a term for this but hospitality ain’t in it.
Also, Pam didn’t drive them to the airport, they left the car there the entire week?
It’s turtles all the way down.
MW: Vicki’s plan to meet the hunky lifeguard by feigning drowning are spoiled by buttinsky Olive.
“I hate you!” She says once on shore.
Insane, disturbing and yet kind of sexy! Well done,
Uncle LumpyTurtle CarlUnnamed AI Assistant Turtle!@Hibbleton: Coincidentally in a Fairly Odd Parents episode, where Timmy and his evil babysitter (also named Vicky) were trapped in a cave in a snowy forest, while being stalked by a yeti.
They did some legitimate friendship bonding and Vicki even opened up as to why she’s such a b**** and apologized.
Then it turned out that the “Yeti” that Timmy eventually saves her from was actually a hunky lost pizza delivery guy (dressing up as Yeti is the chain’s gimmick)
Vicky: You didn’t save me from a monster, you saved me from a hot guy! And I’ll never forgive you!
MW: I guess if the lifeguard would stop staring at the sun, he might have noticed Vicki before Olive tried to save her.
FC: Jump! Jump! Jump!
Dustin: Yeah, Ed was so terrified, he was panic-eating that cookie. Yeah, that’s the ticket.
[AI Turtle]: “I see that you are sporting a coprophagous grin, Turtle Carl. While your own depicted apparent coprophagia is, of course, stylized, there are many members of the animal kingdom who are in fact coprophagous. They include the dung beetle, Scarabaeidae; the mountain cottontail, Sylvilagus nuttallii; the broom hare, Lepus castranejoi; and the rock cavy, Kerodon rupestris.”
[Turtle Carl]: “No [expletive deleted]!”
[AI Turtle]: “Au contraire, my amphibious friend!”
Luann: What kind of monster trains their dog to become excited by cottage cheese?!?
CS: I’m sure the owner of the Winnipeg team is feeling very good about the expenditure in exchange for this publicity.
9CL: Just Edda flipping off Amos in the throwaway panels.
@Baja Gaijin: That’s about the size of it.
@Baja Gaijin: I miss the simplicity and plain speaking of the early Turtle Carl. He’s right, A.I. is not a good look for him.
MW:
“Lifeguard!”
“Don’t bother me, lady. This mythological ancient Greek guy Icarus — Daedalus’ kid — is flying too close to the sun, and he’s gonna crash!”
Fun animal facts and mocking AI slop? Thanks Turtle Carl!
MT: The only gator meme I know off the top of my head is the Flat Fuck Friday one, but I suppose a Sunday strip about how gators are not in fact flat would be less interesting.
Shoe: The fact that his date hasn’t thrown her glass of wine in his face yet makes this Cosmo’s most successful date in a long time.
DT: Okay, so this miracle locrian gel stores energy, is nontoxic and can make hair grow, and we’ve seen it can important discharge that energy rapidly. So why did LaKoyle Labs need to go to a loan shark? There are plenty of venture capitalists that would take a flyer on such a project – how much can loan sharks like this guy offer, tens of thousands? Venture capitalists could offer millions – for a chunk of the company, but it is all legal and safe. So, is this the new artist’s version of Diet Smith? No mustache?
Finally, I’ll bite – what has Virgil the Roman poet have to do with Locris a region in greek? Is someone here with a solid Classics background able to shed light on this?
MW:Moy actually got one fact right – in riptide situations, swim parallel until clear of the tide before heading towards shore. Please now let the twist be that there is a bull shark waiting to pounce.
JP: The collapse of basic tradecraft continues – the self-identified CIA operative calls on a house landline to her handler and tells everything over the phone! Meanwhile Aksel is free and if he is not part of the scheme (any scheme) he is talking with the police and someone there would wonder enough to send a team over to check on the story.
RMMD: Yup, weeks and months of gradually learning more of each other’s lives condensed in RMMD time to two strips, meanwhile the “difficult” brother is still doing background checks on Cody.
Shoe: I’ve never bothered with dating sites/apps, so I’m curious; what are the consequences to lying about your appearance and identity beyond the obvious of not getting laid like you hoped to? Do you get reported and banned from the site or something? Or are you left alone to keep catfishing people? I ask all this because I’m curious what fate will befall Perfesser’s profile after this lady is done kicking the shit out of him in the nearest alley.
@treetown: the self-identified CIA operative calls on a house landline to her handler and tells everything over the phone!
This was a joke in Spies Like Us. In 1985.
C’shaft: Karen Moy has NYC, Francesco Marciuliano has Norway; meanwhile Tom Batiuk is taking his tax write-off “research” trip to…Winnipeg.
DT: Look, I’m a myth geek, D’Auliares’ book was my go-to library check-out back in the day, but I have no idea what you’re getting at here.
…And this is where Comics Kingdom started to go wonky on me. More later, perhaps.
@ectojazzmage: Depends on if you get reported to the site by your date or not, but most sites have such a feature.
JP – Remember how Sophie is such a genius that she hacked into a Pentagon satellite so she could control one of their drones? Now she and Reena are so brainless and inept that they make the Three Stooges look intellectual. However, they are not as brainless and inept as the writing of this dreck.
Pluggers – If he drops food on his arms he can lick it off with his tongue, but that’s not possible on his face. If his wife is also a cat, she can help him out.
I thought that pluggers dropped lots of food on their shirts, but now I find out that they get it in their beards. I guess I have to recalibrate my understanding of pluggers.
FC – Why didn’t Bil draw the Golden Gate Bridge in this? If my memory is correct, those Victorian houses aren’t anywhere near a cable car line.
Pickles – This one hits close to home.
Rex Morgan, MILF Diver: Jonah probably was sexually abused by all his siblings. But, yeah, that doesn’t mean he should cop an attitude.
Obviously, we don’t expect realism in RMMD, but the response should not be, “Don’t try. You’ll just end up frustrated” and should be, “Jonah doesn’t want to be involved with us. Respect that.” Even better: “Respect that, you asshole.”
@treetown: Yeah, the whole Dick Tracy arc is making less sense the further we get into it. These gals have made the biggest breakthrough in sustainable energy since the solar panel; they should be beating off government grants and corporate buyouts with a stick, not robbing power plants and murdering loan sharks! I mean Hell, even if there’s some as-yet-unrevealed problem that makes the stuff prohibitively dangerous, there’s enough opportunists in the world that won’t give a crap and market it anyway (see: pretty much anything Tesla has put on the road).
@Baja Gaijin: #14 – Mashups – Did they get any food into their mouths?
@Baja Gaijin: #15 – I see that as “pluggers can be lazy” instead of pathetic. It goes against the usual “pluggers are hard working salts of the earth,” but I guess it’s because he won’t put dishes in the dishwasher because that’s wimmens work.
@Ken: I thought that that’s a poor lifeguard who didn’t notice that the only two swimmers in the water were having a drowning incident.
FC: “This doesn’t tickle my tummy as much as my gym teacher.”
“What?”
“…as much as
my gym teachera Ferris wheel.”Blondie: “Office manager”? Wait, Dagwood does more than simply lose clients and screw up contracts?
MW: Let’s breathe a sigh of relief. Oh, she wouldn’t drown. I’m just glad that this didn’t drag on as long as RMMD and The Case of the Bandmate’s Wandering Spermatazoa”.
FG: I’m not the first to note this but Flash’s Edda is now the most appealing woman of her name in comics.
Slylock Fox is here to provide security to a town full of anthros who write down their secret codes. All in one place. In a book labelled Passwords. Bob Weber Jr is putting his prior job in IT to good use.
Turtle Carl, you lucky reptile, enjoy your dalliance with the AI. When I try to get frisky with ChatGPT, it just puts me in the friend zone.
@I speak Jive: Per your note yesterday, yeah, even in the world of legacy (before my parents were born) strips, I really don’t get Gasoline Alley. The near-vaudeville schtick of Barney Google & Snuffy Smith is Moliere by comparison.
[flashback music] It was early summer, business was slow, all the top-tier Big Name Talent was on hiatus – time for a little vacay! So I picked Hawaii for my getaway. Great weather, relaxing on the beach,
beautiful babes in bikinis. But I shoulda known better than to take that three-hour cruise… what happened next was just unbelievable.And I’m sure if I told you the details, you wouldn’t believe a word of it! Especially after that rogue CIA agent got involved… the less said, the better. Anyway, I just flew back and boy, are my arms tired heh heh heh And just in time for Turtle Carl’s annual visit! What serendipity!
I don’t know how you do it, Carl. You’ve gotta be well into your 200s now, but I swear you don’t look a day over 180! Unc must be treatin’ you okay – but remember, you always have “options” … and I don’t mean that stupid A.I. crapola! Our agency remains the premier choice among Animal Actors for our stellar service and unmatchable benefits! Just ask our Turtle and Tortoise clients about our shell-waxing spa package!
My thanks to my capable Intern for holding down the fort here in my absence, and keeping you updated with promos for our clients… WHAT?? He hasn’t??? I gotta have a word with him…
Did the prompt for the World of Animals AI-generated banner involve Munch’s “The Scream”?
Don Abundio, translated:
[Sign: ANTIQUE SALTSHAKERS]
“Do you think all the stuff in here is for sale?”
“I hope so!”
@Charterstoned: Those perpetual banner comics on comicskingdom really should win some sort of award for worst web site design.
@treetown:
Ajax the Lesser was called “the Locrian.” He figured in Virgil’s Aeneid, mostly in flashbacks to the Trojan War, in which he fought for the Greeks. He violated the temple of Athena to seize Cassandra, and may have raped her there. Athena punished the Greeks for not killing him, by sinking many of their ships on the way back home.
Sure, a bird feeds their “non-viable offspring” to an alligator and its a cheerful “both benefit”, but if I try to feed my idiot son to one it’s all “you’re a horrible mother” and they haul me away in handcuffs. Phooey!
@Peanut Gallery:
Yup: “Draw a smiling turtle centered in a post-apocalyptic landscape in the style of Edvard Munch’s The Scream.”
And we’re back!
Dustin: “It’s all right, honey,” Helen said sweetly. “I know a big, important lawyer like you has so many things on his mind and can’t be bothered to keep track of things like birthdays and anniversaries. Here, would you do me a favor and move these over to the table while I get dinner ready? I’m making your favorite, filet mignon with bearnaise sauce and bacon-cheddar mashed potatoes…”
Distracted by the promise of food, Ed took the vase from her hands….which shattered on the floor a few seconds later as he dropped it with a yelp.
“Oh dear,” Helen said, looking at the little creature scurrying away from the fallen flowers and into some hidden crevice. “That looked like an Atrax robustus, or Sydney funnel web spider. It must have hitched a ride on one of the orchids. I hope it didn’t bite you…they’re supposed to be among the deadliest spiders in the world.” The horror that spread over Ed’s face as he looked at the small marks on his thumb was the most wonderful sight in the world. “Oh, you poor thing, it did bite you, didn’t it? Well, I’ll call 911, but I’m afraid it won’t do much good…Atrax robustus venom works very quickly, I’m afraid. And very painfully, too.”
Ed tried to answer, but he was already struggling to breathe, clutching at his thick neck with trembling hands. “Goodbye, Ed,” Helen said, turning away as he collapsed on the shards of broken pottery. She took her phone out of her pocket, but waited a few more minutes before she began to dial. It wouldn’t do to have the EMTs arrive too early, after all.
JP: Does anyone in this strip do their basic due diligence?
MW: You remember that old Simpsons episode where John Waters guests as a gay man Homer hates until the typically absurd denouement, prompting the line “Well, Homer, I earned your respect, and all I had to do was save your life”? This is like that, only played completely straight with zero irony or self-awareness.
RMMD: That guy is supposed to be the drummer for a roots country band? He looks like he’s getting ready to lecture a 1950s high school about the dangers of marijuana. He looks like a man who calls jazz “jungle music.” He probably ratted out Truck to the HUAC.
MW- this little vignette kinda ruins Olive’s assertion that she’s different. The fact that she’s watching the mean girls enough to see Vicki is in trouble, shows that she wants to be with them. All this talk of ” I want to stay who I am”, is just tween posing.
MW: Ah, I see the problem here. Beach Management hired a blind guy to be the lifeguard. “Two girls are drowning!” “Where?” “Uhhhh…two o’clock!”
Would someone please explain today’s Doonesbury punchline?
@Ukulele Ike: Immigrants are being deported, so there’s nobody to work at the farmer’s market, cook in the restaurant, trim the hedges, etc. B.D. is saying Boopsie will realize this eventually.
@aileen88b: Thank you. Sometimes I can’t see the forest for the trees.
So Olive does something that interfere with other people’s role and potentially makes the situation more burdensome (instead of doing the obvious common sense action she should have done in the first place), but will inexplicably get the credit for saving the day anyway, despite technically making things worse for everyone?
Wow she really is Mary Worth’s protege. Our young disciple has definitely been keeping up and paying attention to the “important lessons” from her sensei. I’m sure as the crowd pushes aside the lifeguard to gather around Olive and gush about how “heroic” she is, Mary will let out a silent tear of pride and she whispers, “That’s my baby down there!”
Pluggers: “What luck! There’s a French fry in my beard!”
@Peanut Gallery: Also with the pop-up Popeye cartoons..
MW: After Iris saved Zak, they got married. Just saying.
Luann: If that’s a harness, it’s missing the neck loop. If it’s a standard collar it’s probably crushing his ribs and lungs. Either way, Puddles is not going to fare well.
@Uncle Lumpy: Thanks! I scream, you scream, we all scream for Turtle Carl!
LUANN: Shannon: “Dogs act so disobedient when you kidnap them from their owners! Sheesh!” (Thanks for the explanation for why two non-Luann people are walking her dog, by the way, writers!)
LUANN (2): You know what? I’m such an idiot because the always reliable and accurate Trufans have, of course, already rationalized this bizarre set-up:
That just makes too much sense! Naturally, as a busy firefighter Toni has all the time in the world! (We also know this is bullshit because as the very last storyline demonstrated, Frank and Nancy are never at the restaurant they own and manage. Never!)
LUANN (3): Why does this dog inexplicably have a leash around his torso, you asks? Well don’t worry, the Trufans are on that too:
The “artistic convenience”, of course, is to save Greg Evens from having to draw Puddles with an actual neck that a collar would fit around like a normal dog would have. See, everything has a “rational” explanation for it!
@Needless Exposition: To be fair, I do think a girl drowning does count as an “actual problem.” Yes, even if it just “Vicki” (wait, when did she rate an actual name?You know what? Until the story officially christens her to be “Olive’s new BFF”, I’m going to continue to call her “Girl #3”, ‘k?)
If alligators are such ‘good neighbors’, why hasn’t State Farm™ adopted them as its Geico Gekko?
If you see a gator wondering around a golf course, don’t panic, he’s not looking for food, just a mate. Is Mark endorsing human golfer/ gator couplings?!? Or even golfer/gator/gopher couplings?????
@82 Peanut Gallery:
Maybe closer to rhyming would be, “I call, you call, we all call for Turtle Carl!”
Or not.
@40 Sequitur: “Did you know you can take kernels of corn off a cob with a bundt pan?” No. Unlike pluggers, I can afford to buy my corn de-cobbed.
@48 taig: The dog has to scarf anything even remotely edible that falls on the floor since Miss Inner Beauty often forgets to feed him.
@61 I speak Jive: on Mashups: Feeding frenzies are like that.
MT: If alligators are such good neighbors how come when a family of them moves into your neighborhood the property values drop and your homeowners insurance goes up?
Today’s Comics Commudgeon is brought to you by State Farm™please remember our slogan…..And like a good gator..we’ll eat your unborn children.
©2025 State Farm Inc.
@The Rambling Otter: YES, a wonderful film. She was secretly raising them to restore peace and quiet to the area. Often confused with a hockey movie! Like Capablanca and Casablanca.
The Familliar Mucus: “When do they serve the Rice-A-Roni™,Mommy?”
@Banana Jr. 6000: A funny movie back when goofy comedies were regular features at the cineplex. Oh gosh, I realize I’ve just labeled myself as a plugger. I hope I caught it in time.
@Ken: Yes! Now here is someone who knows how to play golf!
@Sequitur: Well, if we wanted to be hostile we could say “we all snarl at Turtle Carl.” But we wouldn’t do that!
@The Rambling Otter: Betty White playing a psychotic woman
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Were they playing “Password”? Did Psychotic Woman get the word Xylophone?
Ditch the Turtle Carl shit. It isn’t funny.
@The Rambling Otter: #3: It’s the same with new words. Whenever I learn a new word I’ll suddenly hear it being thrown around everywhere where before I never heard it.
@Peanut Gallery:
@Sequitur: Well, if we wanted to be hostile we could say “we all snarl at Turtle Carl.” But we wouldn’t do that!
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Snarl at Carl for awhile and you find out if he’s a snapping turtle.
@TheDiva:
It would have easier to have one of the bad gals have gambling problem or ne’er do well brother holding a marker. Easier and gives DT someone to lean on as well.
Shoe: no wonder they’re both grumpy, they waited till 4 am to have dinner.
@taig: Re MW: The lifeguard’s not staring at the sun, he’s eagerly scanning the next sentence of Gravity’s Rainbow. Curse your irresistible postmodern metafictional allure, Thomas Pynchon!
@taig: 46-He’s too busy airbrushing his abs.
@GarrisonSkunk: That must be one of those alligator memes I’ve heard so much about!
REX MORGAN M.D.: Ok, what’s the most ludicrous and baffling part of this endless exhaustion of a story arc? Let’s examine it panel by panel:
1): Half-sis: “Going so soon? Can’t you stay longer so we can rehash the same plot beats for the 50th time now? My life is somehow even more boring than the usual Rex Morgan M.D. standard. This is the most “excitement” I’ve had in years!”
2): Um…dude? You had a family. You’re trampy mother only died recently, remember. It’s not like you were an orphan. Also if Truck was your birth father, you wouldn’t have had much “family” there either
3): “Thanks for the photos of dad. It was so hard to find pics of him, even though the newspaper that printed his obituary didn’t seem to have trouble and he was in a band popular enough to pull groupies and I personally know one of his band mates but I guess photography wasn’t around in the late 80’s early 90’s when I would have been born, so whatever. Kind of weird that the bandmate in question didn’t mention that I look just like Spuds. I wonder if that info might have been relevant when we were pondering about potential paternity? Oh well….(shrugs)
4) Actually after seeing these photos, I’m starting to think that the sister just secretly took pictures of Cody and claimed they were her dad.
5) Yes whatever reason could Jonah, the brother, have for not wanting to meet this stranger, a product of his father’s mistreatment and disrespect of his mother as a grown-ass adult? (Indeed sis seems surprisingly nonchalant by the whole revelation. Given that she already revealed her dad was a big fat serial cheater, maybe’s she’s resigned herself to the whole thing and gotten used to it. This is probably, like the 12th “love child” she had to “connect” with.) Like I know Jonah is an asshole because Rex Morgan M.D. is utterly incapable of subtlety, but I don’t think a refusal to meet up with your dad’s bastard is proof of that
6) Hey remember what I said earlier about rehashing tiresome plot points?
7) You know, for a woman who desperately wanted Cody to stay so she can spill their whole ding-dang family history, she’s suddenly being awfully vague and cagey right now about what her brother’s whole deal is. We desperately need to extend this pointless storyline at all cost, the sister thinks. Maybe peaking his curiosity with a poor attempt at “intrigue” will help?
@Treetown: Simple solution to a gambling problem — bring your Death Ray along to the casino.
RMMD: The real coinkie-dink here is that both Spuds and Cody choose ‘70s-style sideburns as part of their grooming regimen. It’s not a look you see any more or any where.
@Bob Tice: Yep. And forward-thinking Isaac Asimov had that figured out as early as 1950, when he published “I, Robot
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published under its original title, “Oy VEY, Robots”
@taig: 46-He’s too busy airbrushing his abs.@Scratchy Scrotum LXIX: 59- Jonah:”So when our dad fucked around on my mom it was with your mom? Put ‘er there brudda!”
@Banana Jr. 6000: @treetown: the self-identified CIA operative calls on a house landline to her handler and tells everything over the phone!
This was a joke in Spies Like Us. In 1985.
70s-80s pop culture is right in Franwit’s wheelhouse so that tracks.
Hey, UNCLE LUMPY!
If you can read ahead go read tomorrow’s Mallard Fillmore. It deals with turtles!
I’d link it but… you know.
@2+2=7: 105-Truck’s back at Nick’s diner working out some new songs.”That Varla Jean she’s Cody’s mother. The lyin’ bitch that said that I was the one….Thank God Cody’s not my son!”
Low and Hi less: Did Hi just fake sleep through Trixie’s first word?
MARK TRAIL: Alligators want to mate on the golf course…just like a majority of Floridians! This is part of their “refinement” (it would also be acceptable if they a double-wide or grimy motel room during spring break as their mating habitat. They’d at least be less dangerous than the other “apex predators” hanging around those parts.)
Blondie, the Neighborhood Bumstead: Dagwood explains his George Jetson Job Security. (Oddly logical, and food reference free.)