Triumphant return comics: Sadness, murder, etc.
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Folks! I am back from my vacation, I am tanned, rested, and ready, and I am diving back into that most beloved of all artistic mediums: the daily comics! Big thanks to Uncle Lumpy, and Turtle Carl, and everyone who contributed to the summer fundraiser (you’ll all be getting personal thank-yous soon), but for now I must dedicate my energy to urgent, pressing matters, like what’s going on in the Flagston marriage:
Hi and Lois, 8/18/25
I guess what’s going on in the Flagston marriage is that it’s crying for help! “Fix me!” screams every object in the home Hi and Lois built together, at Lois’s command. “Please!” Ha ha, just kidding, this is about chores or whatever, it’s definitely not a metaphor for anything.
Slylock Fox, 8/18/25
You know who can’t scream anymore, though? That fish, whose skeleton, picked clean, is lying in the middle of Slylock’s crime scene. Hey, did you know that some species of shrew eat small fish? Just thought that was a fun fact. I’m sure Shady’s transparent lies about the disruption of a sand sculpture contest — exactly the sort of thing that we know catches Slylock’s attention — are just his usual clumsy attempts to exonerate himself, and not a distraction from a much more monstrous crime.
Mother Goose and Grimm, 8/18/25
Since I often criticize syndicate colorists on here, I have to compliment whoever it was that made Ma Goose’s little breath clouds that particularly unpleasant shade of brown, which does a much better job of conveying how vile her morning breath is than the clichéd writing of the joke. Comics: occasionally remembering that they are, in fact, a visual medium!
Judge Parker, 8/18/25
Good news: Ever since a series of embarrassing Senate hearings in 1976, the CIA has “strongly discouraged” its agents from murdering children. Bad news: Well, I guess the second panel here has already established what the bad news is, ha ha!
111 replies to “Triumphant return comics: Sadness, murder, etc.”
The real question is, did Shady destroy the sand sculpture in an attempt to bump off the competition and win the contest himself? Or was he just being a dick?
JP: They’re not “girls;” they’re ‘women.’ I think it’s time you had another talk with HR.
Hi writes “I need attention too” on a Post-It and affixes it to his crotch.
MW: Vicki: “You saved my life! Want to be friends?”
Olive: “Screw that. You’re my servant FOR LIFE. I have gifts, bitch, and don’t you forget it!”
RMMD: It’s Uncle Jonah. Turns out HIS father was an alien.
DtM: It’s probably a mercy that no one’s had The Talk with Dennis.Just imagine the havoc he could wreak with THAT knowledge.
GT: Oh, come on, Gil. We all know you’re going to fall for the (most certainly fake) groveling toady routine.
MG&G: Since the anthropomorphic goose’s anthropomorphic pets have most likely pooped in her anthropomorphic shoes while she slept, they should come down off of their high (anthropomorphic?) horses already.
Welcome back, Josh and THANK YOU, Uncle Lumpy!
H&L: Lois looks quite shapely in her outfit while Hi looks like his usual shlubby self. In other words, quoting Red Green, Hi, “if the women don’t find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.”
CS: Hey, you know what really saves money in your senior years? Not buying a trip for two to Canada because you spilled bleach on a t-shirt.
DT: Diet Smith is off on a lunar mission leaving Dr. Faust to make a deal with the zap gun devils?
RMMD: The kid has an eye, that is a very good likeness!
MW: Strange, the sea water shrunk Olive. I thought she was as tall and big as Mary in some of the prior strips.
Phantom: Yessiree, General, your careful combing through of the CVs allow you to exert strong psychological leverage on these employees. Of course have an authoritarian dictatorship ruled by an iron fist with roving death squads is an added help. Ever wonder sir, if we could skip the close vetting and all of the data entry and just doubled down on the physical oppression?
JP: Before you hang up, be sure to discuss how while operating on foreign soil you plan on disposing of two US citizens by “handling” them. Please let the twist be that the CIA just boots them out on the street and them to go get a hotel and scram! In the meantime, they have gotten ahold of Glen and like the Impossible Mission Force, completely denies any involvement or knowledge of the girls. As for the “B” plot – Pavel Jr. has long gotten away after tying an anvil or cinderblock around April and dumping her into a convenient fjord.
H&L: I’m imagining Lois singing that last line in James Taylor’s voice…
SFx: I love how happy Shady Shrew looks delivering that line. “Yep, I used that log as a pillow, the sand as my sheets and some dried kelp as a pillow mint! To hell with Motel 6, I got it all right here, baby!”
MGG: I’m reminded of one of my favorite Seinfeld quotes: “This pen smells bad…so why am I smelling it?”
RMMD:The way the little girl is staring at Cody. It’s like she’s thinking “What are you really up to, Pal?”
MW: And yet Mary will still try to take credit for everything as if the poor lifeguard who did literally everything was just a faceless NPC.
Mary Worth knows damn well there’s nothing “amazing” about foolishly and recklessly forcing a lifeguard to do a double-rescue. But, it gives her the opportunity to get handsy with a wet 14-year-old in a swimsuit.
Hi and Lois – This was originally going to be an extended Sunday version, but editors refused to run the image of a ruined and stained couch with Dawg having a “Fix Me” Post-It note attached to him.
Slylock Fox – At least Max is mourning the dead, sentient fish.
Mother Goose and Grimm – If Slylock Fox or Mark Trail ever had a sibling who was a doctor, they could pop-in and talk about how certain ailments common in old-people comics (Mother Goose and Grimm, Pluggers, Shoe) are symptoms of some bigger health issue. It’s certainly more likely than ever expecting it from Rex Morgan.
MW: A furious Vicki calls her agent; “All that face time and not one line!?”
@Hibbleton: There is a reason Red would always end the show with sexual innuendo in his closing message to his wife Bernice, while Hi and Lois have heavy lidded ennui as their primary interaction
Slylock Fox:
I’ve got it! — someone was overheard to have told Shady, “Go pound sand!”, and Slylock picked up on the command.
Without the usual gold coins or stacks of money he can seize as “evidence,” a bored Slylock says “It’s just a bunch of sand, guys. Get over it.”
Hi and Lois: If Hi won’t fix it, call a plumber and a repairman, then have Hi pay the bills.
SFox: Shady was just looking for a safe place to sleep on the beach, and the cordon seemed like it would provide some measure of security. Not enough to stop his thrashing night terrors, though.
@Hibbleton: “Don’t worry honey! Your line is coming up in a day or two! Just remember it’s ‘You girls shut up about Olive! She saved my life and now she’s my bestest friend and I’m gonna spend all my time with her and her old lady friend from now on!’ Think you can remember that? There’s a lot riding on you getting it right, have you ever heard of ‘the cornfield’?”
“Hi, commenters! It’s Turtle Carl, back for a reprise! Now, nearly all of you picked up on the sardonic nature of my appearance with my AI doppelganger yesterday, but a (thankfully, precious) few of you painted an unflattering picture of me, and you were all over the map — I mean, you put me flatback on my chelonian heels. Listen, I don’t know why you few were snapping at me — it’s as if you wanted to box me in, and that put us at loggerheads! Anyway, if we can’t reach some kind of rapprochement here, I want you few to know that any effort to break my steely resolve to appear in this feature from time to time in the future would be like an effort to tear a pin!”
BF: How long before the distillery start-up ladies offer Susan a chance to invest some cash in the company?
H&L: The passage of time has not been kind to jokes like these. Once upon a time, we would all understand that only men could be entrusted with such dangerous primeval forces as electricity, super glue, wrenches, drawer knobs, etc. Nowadays, in our more egalitarian age, the joke is less “Hi, the breadwinner, has let his home fall into disrepair”, and more “Doesn’t Lois even know how to use a screwdriver?”
JP:
“Out in ten.”
“Minutes?”
“No, hours.”
JP:
“Listen, Boss, I’m going to be wrapping up my career with the agency here, anyway. The Elmer’s Glue people spotted the nose ring I’m sporting, and now they want me to replace their mascot!”
@treetown: Shrinkage is real…
@astroboy: Not that Mary cares about whether or not the lifeguard has any feelings. She refers to him as “lifeguard” the way she would refer to a child with slightly more melanin than her as “boy.”
MW: Ummm…hello Mr Lifeguard, goodness gracious.
MW: fuck off Mary. Fuck right off. I apologize but I had to get that off my chest.
Shady’s real crime is combining a Hawaiian shirt with a speedo. Being an animal is no excuse for such inhumanity!
MW – Vicki looks despondent, and with good reason. Now she has Jimmy Hensley’s cooties, which Olive picked up in third grade and neglected to get rid of by touching someone else. Now she’s the outcast.
If I cut out the image of Lois saying “the broken things are crying for help”, I could turn it into a viral #relatable Tumblr post
Or, you know, just throw out that tacky cheap pink vase, Lois. There is no way Hi is going to use the Japanese art of kintsugi to bring new life to it. At best he’ll slather on some Gorilla glue and you’ll constantly have to remember to turn that side to the wall.
***
Sometimes your first thought is, “But she can’t be CIA, they’re not allowed to this kind of thing on US soil.” But then sometimes there is your own Comment of the Week staring you in the face reminding you that this is taking place in Norway and Sam is probably still angrily awake.
MW: Risking your life and having the lifeguard do more work is not “amazing” and should not be applauded. Olive should not be praised but instead lectured about how absolutely stupid she was to jump in there because she most likely would have drowned along with Little Orphan Knockoff there.
MG&G: At first, I thought Grimm was misquoting Ali Baba & the Forty Thieves.
@Professor Well Actually:
I’m right with you on the fuck-offery, Prof.
Mary’s way off base meddling throughout this story has been bad enough, but callously treating the heroic lifeguard like an NPC while showering yet more unearned praise on Olive is the last straw.
Rather than advise Olive to stop it with the whiny narcissism and endless self-hagiography so as to develop normal relationships with her parents and peers, who very understandably despise her, Mary continues to encourage more of the same “I’m so special, I’m so gifted, I must always be the center of attention, look at me, me, me!” behavior, pushing it to absurdity in this case, where Olive endangered herself, her classmate and the lifeguard. Right now, Olive should be being sternly lectured by Mary and the lifeguard, instead of getting her pimento plumped like this.
JP-When stuck in a hole for a story revert to the CIA plot.
MW-“Thank god”? Uh, Mary, shouldn’t you be thanking yourself?
FC-“We’re going to crash,” the trolley driver screams hysterically.
Daddy Daze-“You want to rock and roll all night and party everyday.”
JP:
Out of curiosity, when people at governmental investigatory agencies speak with their subordinates, do they address them using titles rather than their actual first names, or is this just a stylized form of address made for Exposition Comic Strip Effect? I mean, I’m a partner at the law firm where I work, but when I call a younger lawyer to give that person an assignment, I don’t say, ‘Associate! — research for me what the statute of limitations is for thus-and-such’.”
@Liam: Funny thing, in one of my videogame RPGs, the God of Insanity passes the torch to you, becoming the new God of Insanity. If you go to his (well, your) shrine and pray, your assistant asks why you’re praying to yourself. Then realizes “Oooh right, God of Insanity and all that…”
“Ah, you must be Sophie and Reena. I’m Agent Smith, and this is Agent Smith – no relation. Just wanted to let you know you’re free to go and talk about this as much as you want. Of course, if you start talking about CIA operations in Norwegian Air B&Bs you’ll sound just as nuts as half of the people on the Internet, so no matter what you say people aren’t going to believe you. Kill you? You thought we were going to kill you? Do you know how much paperwork there is in dead bodies? No, just get out, here’s a refund of your down payment and the rest of what you paid for this month’s rent. There’s a lovely apartment downtown you two should be able to afford. Go, get on with your lives, girls!”
@Bob Tice: I believe that it is “maybe” because the deeper levels of the C.I.A and F.B.I and such are so classified and Black OPs. That you can’t risk saying an Agent’s real name (who knows who is tapping the phones?)
H&L – Hey – how can I mend this broken tap – how can this loser ever win; Please help me mend this broken tap, and let me live again….
SFx – Call out the National Guard….
MG&G – Sherman’s lagoon….
JP – Alligator Alcatraz….
Adios Amigos, DJ.
H&L: The flip side of the notes say stroke me. “You can fix all these things or meet me in the bedroom. Either way, you have some work to do.”
JP:
Is Agent Provocateur here sort of an antimatter Betty Crocker? — is her catchphrase, “All good things start with Betty Crocker cake mix — but I, being her antimatter counterpart, don’t start good things”?
@Bob Tice: Well, if you’re a partner, of course you don’t call them ‘associate.’ You don’t speak to them at all!
@Voshkod: Like that Simpsons episode where the aliens have a plot to replace the Presidential Candidates and rule Earth in disguise.
Homer: I’m going to tell everybody!
Alien: Not so fast! (Pulls out a ray gun)
-The gun merely squirts liquid on Homer-
Homer: What is this?
Alien: RUM! So no-one will believe your story.
@astroboy: As irritating as Olive is with her narcissistic humble bragging drivel, I blame Mary fully on this. She is the adult in this situation and she is not acting like it but instead her priorities are being an absolute creep towards a fourteen year old girl and enabling her self centered behavior. If I were the Taylors, I would ban Mary not only from my home but also any and all social interaction…and make her pay for her own hotel and flight home.
Lois is wearing a low-cut square-neck blouse and black tight shorts from 3M’s 2025 “Post-it note in clothing form” line.
FC: Between Jeffy and PJ, I totally understand the Keane’s use of open-air transport whenever possible.
@Schroduck: Or it is part of her passive aggressive way of pointing out some more of Hi’s many shortcomings and deficiencies. Now, that is relative modern.
@Professor Well Actually: Thirded. This whole story is like Act I of a 1990s After School Special about sexual predators. Act 2 is, of course, Mary making her move. Act 3 is everybody being surprised that this dubious intergenerational friendship had sinister motives all along.
Actually, you’re a Plugger if you carry Facebook on your computer.
@Schroduck: Or it is part of her passive aggressive way of pointing out some more of Hi’s many shortcomings and deficiencies. Now, that is relative modern.@LTJpezcore1: @Voshkod: That could work actually. Imagine ” Sure, tell people we have a ‘secret’ base with aliens and flying saucers hidden in the desert.
Big props to yesterday’s Judge Parker for resolving a plot hole with “There was probably an entry code for teh vacation home in the stuff Glen sent me, which I didn’t read.” This rings true to life!
Low And Hi-less: Dawg is understandably upset at the Fix Me post-it attached to his hinder.
H&L: Exactly how should a cracked vase be fixed?
On the other hand “The CIA agent has a pierced septum” is probably also true to life and I hate it.
@Needless Exposition: Now, let’s look at it from the parent’s point of view: (1) regular zoom and facetime with MW means Olive is not pestering either one of them with her problems like the bullies at school, her burden of responsibility due to her powers, and the dark reality that often she will see things that she cannot prevent, (2) keeps her tied up all day, so they can get frisky all over their wonderful brownstone (?) on the upper east side of NYC
@astroboy, MW: Moy gets a strongly-worded letter from the Evansii: “Stay in your lane! We did the same plot when our titled character saved an old lady, right down to ignoring the NPC who actually save her. And our titled character has Inner Beauty! What does your loser character have?”
DtM: “I get it, Dennis;” says a smiling Joey. “Now which of us gets to wear the perfume.”
@treetown: Oh, right, the Taylors are negligent morons like every other parent/guardian in Mary Worth. Throw Olive to the nearest ephebophile (Ian, Mary, or Wilbur) and get back to forgetting about having a self centered weirdo of a child in the first place.
DT: In the role of Dr. Faust, please welcome Ray Walston, star of “My Favorite Martian.”
GT: After Mimi got the bed in the divorce, Gil built a new one out of books he found in the Milford Public Library dumpster. It’s not comfortable but he and Beth now know a lot about DOS and COBOL.
MW Forget the snark, yowza – Brigman is bringing it with the lifeguard drawing!
FC Again, I have no snark this morning, just idle thoughts that unless you’ve had a thorough explanation of cable car operations, it sure looks like the conductor is braking instead of speeding up by grabbing the cable. I wonder how many adult readers don’t get the “kids say the darndest things” bit because they see it like Billy does.
H&L: American civilization as a giant job jar is pretty deep for the H&L team but I like it.
Slylick Fox And Comix For Kinx: Shady says, “I read Comics Commudgeon, and all of Josh’s talk of Lucky Eddie and mermaid sex made me curious. Its not my fault!”
And so began the historic case of Rabbit v. Fruhlinger /Shrew / Eddie.
@Little Guy: H&L: Exactly how should a cracked vase be fixed?
_______________________
Don’t play ball in the house.
H&L: The Kudlicks wish they had this level of passive-aggression in their marriage. (The Lockhorns, meanwhile, know that actual aggression is where it’s at.)
JP: And just what was her work, exactly? Keeping tabs on April and Shady Antagonist du Jour? Because she needed the Snoop Sisters here to give her the details on that. Maybe Leah knows she’s about to be fired for incompetence and wants to recruit Sophie and Reena to take her place.
@Rube: In 2025, you’re a Plugger if you use Facebook at all.
@CanuckDownSouth: June’s been sneaking in some hunks in the background probably out of protest for Moy being a creepazoid.
MW: Tomorrow’s adventure: Vicki begins power-vomiting all the seawater she swallowed out there, along with the four hot dogs she ate at the concession stand. Duck!
JP: “Congraulations, gals, the CIA is gifting you the house. You see, I DID murder the old woman. Gotta run, deed’s in the desk drawer.”
@Banana Jr. 6000: @Rube: In 2025, you’re a Plugger if you use Facebook at all.
____________________
In the year 20 25/ if Pluggers are still alive/if their chicken wives have survived they may find….
Lockhorns: Just for that, Leroy, the doctor will prescribe you laudanum.
We present Beetle Bailey and Sarge, in “There’s a first time for everything”, or “Say hello to cholera,, your new best friend!”
FC: Billy wants to reenact the Woodbridge train derailment. This one’s Thel’s fault. Well, also Lionel, who made the train set she bought Billy.
BG&SS: Doc’s hiree learned the first rule of crossing logs: Don’t make it an inch longer than it needs to be.
Judge Parker: You just called them “kids” on Sunday, Landlady-San! Of course your superior is going to call them “girls” on Monday! Make up your mind!
(Alt joke: “They’re not girls. They’re in their 20s. And I’ll handle it.” “How?” “Give them strappy sandals, a couple of chocolate martinis and a Tik Tok, duh.”)
Mother Goose and Grimm: Honest question: does anyone else see Mother Goose’s breath as more green than brown, or is it just my lying eyes?
Beat Up Bailey: Looks like Sarge knows what you’ve been doing in that foxhole, Beetle!
Hi and Lois: Because somebody had to do it.
SFx – I know this is beside the point, but I am genuinely concerned for that extremely fair-skinned, red-headed rabbit in a bikini. You know she’s not wearing a sunblock with any SPF in it – she’s going to look like a boiled lobster in minutes, and by the time she’s 30, she’s going to look like a leather handbag. Sun damage is real, people (and cartoon rabbits). I’m old enough that I remember Bain de Soleil for that San Tropez tan, but young enough to know that sunscreen saves lives. The saboteur shrew is the least of your worries, kid.
Welcome back, Josh! I’m sure you vacationed like a champion.
I hope you went somewhere better than Slylock Fox Beach, where they decided to have a sand sculpture contest in which the sculptures are inexplicably left at the mercy of the elements overnight before judging.
C’shaft: Pam, you were canonically at Kent State at the same time the National Guard was gunning down protesters. People born that year qualify for senior discounts; you have no right to act shocked.
Dustin: “Oh, I forgot to mention there was some old strychnine back there from when we had the rat problem. Do you suppose that’s still good too?”
*thud*
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
GT: Oh shut up, Gil. If I wanted false humility I’d go over to Mary Worth.
MW: Frankly, I’m just surprised Mary didn’t take all the credit for herself. She was the one who alerted Lifeguard (I guess that’s the guy’s name, funny coincidence that), after all.
JP – Wait, insisting on respect for young women by not referring to them as “girls”? That’s “woke” behavior, agent 13! Didn’t you get the memo from the new administration? Surrender your CIA credentials immediately!
The Familliar Mucus: “Are you from England?, I see you’re a born *lever puller*!”
Pun stolen from ” Yellow Submarine” by Billy,age 5.
Don Abundio, translated:
“Here comes Mitzi! I’ll invite her to dinner!”
“I am your conscience, Abundio! The way you chase after these young women is pathetic”
“Bah! They find me charming and distinguished!”
“Well, you can believe what you want…”
“But HER conscience will only go so far for a fancy dinner!”
MW: I binge watched a a Netflix series on lifeguards on Bondi Beach in Australia. I’m pretty sure Lifeguard would have been on top of the situation and may have had a Seadoo available.
Dustbin – For someone who leaves unwrapped Twinkies in the kitchen cupboard, she has an amazing memory.
SLYLOCK FOX: Yes, but Josh, it’s a fish!! Even in the Animalpocalypse, no one but Wilbur Weston cares about the corpse of those. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go spend time consoling Wilbur over his “triggered” PSTD.
@Voshkod:
Point.
Snap fingers.
Afterwards: “You should have known what I meant”.
@matt w: Comes right off. Doesn’t leave any sticky residue.
@TheDiva: Re: Mary Worth: Oh, Silly! Mary isn’t greedy. She’s well aware it’s Olive’s time to shine! Mary knows she gets her turn, when she spends the next 4 weeks reccapping this storyline to Dr. Jeff over reheated fish sticks at The Bum Boat (“Olive’s a special little girl that you inspired,” Jeff will eagerly say, hoping upon hope it’ll at least allow him to get to second base* with his lover.)
*Mary: “If ‘second base’ means ‘a peck on the cheek while briefly holding hands on an after-dinner moonlight stroll on the pier’, then ok, I guess he’ll have ‘earned’ it.”
@2+2=7: I’m pretty sure doing the deed with Mary would involve abrasions and pain.
HI AND LOIS: I don’t know if this is a marriage metaphor, Josh. Otherwise Hi would have put the “fix me” note over the leaky pipes while flashing Lois bedroom eyes.
Hi AND LOIS (2): Of course metaphor or now, their “problem” is eventually going to be solved by Lois calling in a bunch of expert repairmen to come and do Hi’s “job” for him.
@Needless Exposition: Hey, this lifeguard already has more prominence than Skylar (just a little “inside baseball” for all you Baywatch, or at least Baywatching fans.)
@UncleJeff: One of my sons works for a firm now as a law clerk. Partner tells him to print out a bunch of case law for an upcoming trial. He dutifully spends the day download cases from Lexis, puts them in a binder, presents them to the partner. “Oh,” she say, “I prefer Westlaw to Lexis,” and hands to binder back.
MGG
Mother Goose—morning, mouth ajar.
Not sewer. Not skunk.
(It could be worse.)
No, it drifts softer, sideways—
a memory, stale perfume of yesterday,
half-spoiled, half-sweet.
Past tense on her tongue.
@Needless Exposition: MW33-Olive should have just emitted a series of high pitched squeaks-inaudible to humans, and summond Flipper to the rescue.
@Old School Allie Cat: Commendable concern, but will the rabbit make it to 30? Did the Animalpocalypse extend their lifespans, or only curse them with the intelligence to know they’re doomed to die before they’re twenty?
REX MORGAN M.D.: “Thanks pal. That’s a nice drawing of a…um…whatever it is.”
Yep, Cody, that’s how I feel about this weird little boy with the “punch perm” too.
Hi and Lois-Not seen is the note that says ‘Fix our marriage’.
While it’s good to see Josh back, I propose making Turtle Carl a regular daily feature of the blog, just to annoy @Lex.
MW-Mary then turns on the lifeguard and yells at him for letting the Superprecious Olive go into the water and not do his job and stop her.
Hi And Lois: I feel like Lois’ top is low-cut enough that we should be seeing some cleavage, but evidently that’d be too hot and sexy for the newspaper, so instead she’s been drawn with some kind of singular tit instead of an actual rack.
Slylock Fox: As usual, Slylock’s “evidence” is something extremely tenuous that would never hold up in any decent court. But that isn’t a problem; we know by now that Slylock’s definition of evidence is simply whatever gives him an excuse to violently pummel his chosen suspect into confessing their guilt using a phone book.
Judge Parker: So it turns out antagonizing a person you suspect of being a ruthless killer is actually not a good idea and liable to end in you being murdered and left in a ditch somewhere. This seems like common sense, but the characters of Judge Parker clearly have no such thing as common sense considering they’re STILL just sitting dumbly on that couch and politely following the instructions of a person they accused of murder as if they didn’t just give her every reason to put bullets in their skulls.
DUSTIN: So Ed likes eating 20 year-old Twinkies. At least his Grindr profile now makes sense.
MW- For that matter,if nautical nonsense be that which they wish, Mary could drop on the beach and flop like a fish. As for hunky lifeguard boy, you don’t get abs like that from salmon squares and cheddar muffins.
Slylock has found shrew DNA at the site and successfully geolocated Shady’s cell phone to the location. In addition, he has three eyewitnesses and security footage from a local business. Also, Shady’s hatred of sand sculpture is well known and attested to in the public record. Of course, in the end, none of this matters after Slylock marches Shady over that dune. The sea breeze muffles the sound of the shots which send Gilly Gull aloft, squawking indigently, but Chucky Crab eats well when the tide comes in.
Shady Shrew had better watch out. Being a dick and destroying statues is Crankshaft’s thing!
Flash Gordon: Dick Tracy, Judge Parker, Rex Morgan, Mark Trail, Mary Worth, and Prince Valiant only WISH the characters in their strips would talk about them like this.
Shady Shrew: Stupid tide!
@Bob Tice: Same here- But the term I use is “minion”
@Hibbleton:
Welcome back, Josh! Hope you brought a nice gift ($) for the excellent work UL and Carl did.
#2. JP: let’s give Leah a break here. They may get want to be perceived as children if only children shouldn’t be murdered. That’s chronological age, we all know the mental age of recent college grads
BF: of course you’ll be paid less beginning at a start-up than you were aging out of a dying company. It’s your responsibility to make the startup grow, Susan.
@GarrisonSkunk: Oh my nose!!
Pluggers has done this joke before. I know because I sent it in, although I didn’t mention FB specifically.
Judge Parker. Normally, I’d joke that the creative team does all their legal research by watching old “Law and Order” reruns, but these days I’m thinking it is actually “Three’s Company” or maybe “Laverne and Shirley.”