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Archive: Hi and Lois

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Caged lukewarmth

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Gil Thorp, 6/20/23

Some years back, the state of Maryland renamed the government agency in charge of courts, detention facilities, and parole supervision for kids under 18 from the “Department of Juvenile Justice” to the “Department of Juvenile Services,” and I can understand trying to get rid of a label that has punitive implications and maybe try to imply that you’re leaning towards rehabilitation, but (a) you can never win a race on the euphemism treadmill and (b) “Department of Juvenile Services” might falsely lead you to believe that the department was delivering services to young people that weren’t ultimately crime-and-punishment related. Anyway, I bring this up because I thought that was a pretty bad euphemism, but “Milford juvenile sports program manager” as a job title for a prison guard is frankly a lot worse.

Family Circus, 6/20/23

Now, obviously the joke here is that Jeffy is an idiot. But you have to admit that it does present us with a truly horrifying image of a world where children just a little older than Jeffy reach an age at which they lose their “child’s eyes” — maybe they cloud over and harden first, or maybe they just suddenly and painfully pop off the optic nerves, with the new, literate “adult” eyes emerging from bloody sockets over the next few excruciating weeks. This is a lot of body horror to just tell us that Jeffy’s an idiot, in other words, especially considering that most of us already knew that he was an idiot.

Hi and Lois, 6/20/23

The truly depressing thing here is that after nearly 70 years in publication, this strip hasn’t come up with enough of a personality for Ditto to give him a plausible joke.

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Mostly baseball

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Shoe, 5/25/23

I’m not sure if we’s supposed to understand here that Skyler is literally running away from home (if he is, he’s violating the cardinal rule that a runaway child in a comic must have a bindle over their shoulder) or if the Perfesser is staring morosely into his meatloaf a few seats up, leaving Skyler to engage in idle chitchat with a local old guy, who’s advising him on just kind of checking out on life and doing the least possible until death inevitably takes you.

Hi and Lois, 5/25/23

Speaking of coasting through your days, sports sure are fun when they’re easy! You’re not supposed to say this — giving your all and playing to the best of your ability are supposed to be their own rewards — but Walker-Browne Amalgamated Humor Industries LLC doesn’t have patience for society’s meaningless pieties.

Gil Thorp, 5/25/23

Look, I’m not going to say that Milford High is weird, exactly, but I don’t think it’s quite normal for teens to be extremely supportive of a classmate who’s secretly going blind but then cruelly turn on him when the learn that his dad got caught up in a print media plagiarism scandal years earlier. How much could these kids care about journalism ethics? The media figure they have the most contact with is Marty Moon!

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Trixie will be rendered using what critics are calling “the most unsettling CGI yet”

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Six Chix, 5/24/23

Six Chix is a long-running feature that dares to ask the question, “What if women wrote a comic strip? What would we learn about the female sex in the process?” I think we can agree that the answer, if we’re just going by the content of Six Chix, is that women are floridly insane, but you have to admit that they’re more interesting than men, who are just annoying and boring.

Gil Thorp, 5/24/23

One of my tasks as the creator of a blog about newspaper comics, the most nostalgia-infected art form ever created, is to fight against the particularly pernicious type of nostalgia that leads people to say that the past is always better than the present. Like, for instance, longtime Thorp-heads probably would smugly say that, in terms of unpaid randos who helped coach the Mudlark baseball team, it wouldn’t get any funnier than a guy who called himself Clambake and lied about being in the Negro Leagues. And yet today, in this supposedly fallen year 2023, we have a blind guy urging two blindfolded teenagers to hurl baseballs in his general direction, simultaneously! Truly, I tell you that we still live in an age of wonders.

Hi and Lois, 5/24/23

I know the media landscape is troubled and subject to ongoing corporate consolidation, but I don’t know that teasing the idea of an incredible crossover between Spider-Man and his Avengers Pals with the Walker-Browne Extended Universe is the best way for King Features Syndicate parent company Hearst Communications to solicit a takeover bid from the Walt Disney Company.