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Your COTW in a moment, but first: surely you recall this charming COTW runner up from last week:

“Someone really ought to paint panel 1 of Bobbie and Margo on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. They can just paint over whatever’s there now.” –monsieurjohn

Well, faithful reader Brenda Starr Destroyer made that happen. Impressed?

And now, on to the business of the day — the COMMENT OF THE WEEK!

“That look on Sam’s face could be ‘Oh, that’s the guy who’s been nailing my little girl,’ but I prefer to think it’s, ‘A cart? And here I’ve always carried my baggage like a schmo.'” –gleeb

And your funny runners up:

“Don’t listen to her Bobbie! You put that gun down, she will swallow you whole! Like a snake!” –Rantingdude

“Clearly, Billy has decided to start a sandwich collection, and is disappointed to receive one he already has. It’s just like Pokemon cards, only his parents don’t think bread is the work of Satan.” –Andrusi

“The Magee household must have a hell of a thing to witness back in the day since two members of the family ask, ‘What’s going on?’ instead of ‘What’s with the gun?'” –skullcrusherjones

“Billy requires two sandwiches because of the extra stomach in his head.” –Rhekarid

“I love the POV of Gil Thorp’s panel 3. Now we know what the world looks like to Kaz’s left forearm! Hopefully they remember to turn the KazKam off before he hits the men’s room to drain all those lite beers.” –Krazy Kat

“With regard to ‘stepmother,’ I believe the term you’re looking for is ‘evil stepmother.'” –MKH, on the proper description for Bobbie’s relationship to Margo

“It is definitely a mistake to think that Ziggy has ever been within a mile of anything hip enough to be in UrbanDictionary. He’s referring to jacks, which he plays, like the game of life, badly and alone.” –MsMolly

“This is just a rerun of a strip from the 80s, with ‘iTunes’ in place of ‘Pac Man Fever’. And that was just a rerun of a strip from the 60s, with ‘Pac Man Fever’ in place of ‘chlamydia’.” —Chyron HR

“Last time we saw Mark he was in the lake with an overturned canoe after the hairy dudes took a shot at him. Now he is dry, with perfect hair and immaculately ironed clothes. Just more proof Mark is actually made out of plastic. You can also see this because his lips never move. Poor Cherry, I think she thought being married to a tall plastic pillar would be more fun.” –nerowolfgal

“Wow, I never noticed that poor Puddles never made it out of the old Evans drawing style. Puddles is some sort of sad, flabbily drawn, vestigial creature. Whoa … I felt a moment of compassion for him until I remembered that whole Puddles-centric Christmas adventure, where Puddles had thought balloons for what seemed like weeks on end, and romanced some sort of poodley girl dog, and ended up hangin’ with Santa. Fuck you, Puddles.” –Spotted HØrse, Jungle Steed

“Are there actually pluggers in Eugene, Oregon? Or is this ‘Glen Wolfram’ a U of O elitist who said to himself, ‘I dunno, Pluggers something something overeating. Hey, a writing credit’s a writing credit.'” –Artist formerly known as Ben

“The New York Campaign for Cruelty-free Food hung those banners, and ‘Free Pizza!’ is an imperative sentence, calling on the good people of New York to line up, march into Montoni’s, and take action in the name of good pizza. Each misbegotten crime against gastronomy, secured in a well-insulated pizza box, is quietly carried out to the dumpster and compassionately euthanized. Inside the crime scene, or ‘restaurant’, each rescuer is permitted to punch Funky or Les in the face.” –Walker of Dog

“The safeword is ‘Rosebud’ because it’s the last thing you’ll say before you die.” –The TJ

Big thanks to everyone who put cash in my tip jar! And we must of course give thanks to our advertisers:

• Pet the kitty!: Birthday cards, graduation cards, cards for every day; mugs, t-shirts, and assorted nerd schwag. LABKITTY: Stuff for Smart Cats! (One of the creative minds behind this site is faithful reader SmartPeopleOnIce — be sure to let him and his fellow LabKitty designers know what you think on the site feedback page!)
• Alibi Comics T-shirts: Funny alibis. Wear your alibi…or someone else’s. Funny T-shirts, accessories, other clothing.

To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot — and how you could be the launch advertiser for our new RSS feed sponsorship — click here.

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Your COTW coming momentarily, but first: I have been utterly remiss in not linking to faithful reader yellojkt’s annual March Madness-themed comics smackdown! The theme this year is the “National Crappy Comics Copy Cats”, and voting is still open for Calvin Clones, Faux Far Sides, and Doonesbury Dopplegangers. Vote early, vote often!

Also: a plea to elitist iPad users! Are you reading this site on an elitist iPad? 29 of you were yesterday, according to Google Analytics! Anyway, I’d love to hear your impressions on what the site looked like and how it worked on this awesome and terrible new device, so please shoot me an email at bio@jfruh.com, with screenshots, if you can!

And now: your comment of the week!

“‘If you ever need a sympathetic ear’ Mary says, mocking a woman who clearly has no ears, sympathetic or otherwise.” –bunivasal

And the runners up! Very funny!

“Abbey: ‘That’s right. Jules will be sleeping where he’s least likely to have sex with anyone: next to Sam. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an escort to hire.'” –Black Drazon

“I’m intrigued to learn that Sam is a hipster doofus, who may blog about vintage WASP clothing.” –Rusty

“That is the saddest seder ever. And which one of the plagues is ‘Mary Meddles Your Ass’?” –Gabacho

“Because Luann just wouldn’t be Luann without periodic public discussion of teenage girls’ underwear.” –commodorejohn

“What with the problematic real estate market and all, Lois has had to make ends meet by doing a smear job on librarians. Later, in some back alley, an operative from Amazon.com will give her a wad of unmarked bills.” –Jym

“Mary clutches the steaming baking dish in front of her as she talks, as if to entice them to divulge their personal business to her with the promise of its gooey, tan-hued blandness. ‘Just think,’ she whispers, holding it tantalizingly close, and yet just out of their reach, ‘This reconstituted potato-based food substance could be yours … if you tell me everything.'” –Gap-Toothed Starey “HOOOO” Guy

“Dear Rex Morgan Production Team: Sometimes your artwork is a little awkward, but dang how do you manage to peg us SK8RBOYZ so accurately? ’Cause I know there’s nothing I’d rather do than travel from place to place doing pointless manual labour for The Man so’s I can pay back loans from my chick and enjoy a precious Sunday afternoon with my homies stylin’ down the staircase railings over at the Art Museum. It’s like you are inside my mind! Yours truly, Youth With Unbelievable Nickname.” –Mooncattie

“Mary is pointing towards the calendar in order to show Bonnie that, if you wait long enough, all trends come back into style. Specifically, the trend of hot-pink geometrically-patterned curtains next to walls that are painted matte black.” –Patrick

“I think Bobbie is going to shoot Margo, and we’ll have a long-drawn out deathbed scene with rib-tickling histrionics from all the principals until Margo drinks someone’s blood — maybe Tommie’s, since she is probably a virgin — and revives.” –The Divine O’F

“Y’know, putting a shirt or vest on your fursuit just emphasizes its pantslessness.” –Naked Bunny with a Whip

“I’m hoping that someone in A3G gets shot so we can have another round of everyone being surprised that Tommie is working in a hospital.” –Andy L

“Notice how Mark is trying to throw off the Parker Brothers by pointing to the tree: ‘No, leave me, it’s the tree you want!'” –Digger

“Say what you will about this Manley, but that last panel guy’s face takes up an area about 0.75 cm square on my monitor, yet spells out ‘Nice Ass!’ as clearly as if it were the title page of a Reader’s Digest Special Plugger-Friendly Large Print edition (of a book titled Nice Ass!, presumably, which seems a little unlikely now that I think about it, but I’ll let it go).” –One-eyed Wolfdog

“‘And what purpose will that serve? You think such I can be felled by your puny bullets? Haha…ahah…AHAHAHAHAHA.’ Silly Roberta, everyone knows that Margo can only be defeated by the poisonous nectar of human kindness.” –DialMforMerger

“Someone really ought to paint panel 1 of Bobbie and Margo on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. They can just paint over whatever’s there now.” –monsieurjohn

Big thanks to everyone who put cash in my tip jar! And we must of course give thanks to our advertisers:

• The Killing Edge: The disappearance of a young swimsuit model ranks low on the cops’s priority list. Then the ghost of the model appears, asking for help. Don’t miss the latest gripping, haunting, harrowing ghost story from a master storyteller!

To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot — and how you could be the launch advertiser for our new RSS feed sponsorship — click here.

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Yes, your comments of the week are here! Or, more accurately, your comments of the last couple weeks, collected at various times by me and Uncle Lumpy, with significant gaps in the periods during which comments were being monitored for funniness. But still, I think you will appreciate them! Here the comment out of this batch judged most worthy:

“Aw, c’mon, nobody in Hootin’ Holler has ever heard of — much less seen or eaten — an avocado. And if by chance they had, they’d spell it ‘avercodder.'” –jvwalt

And your very funny runners up!

“I’m intrigued by the emptiness of the upper calendar page, which would ordinarily contain a picture of some kind. I was going to make a joke about this, but now I realize that it is in fact a photograph of the gleaming white, featureless background we often see in the Family Circus universe, which is what the Keanes know as ‘scenery.'” –Poor Thompson

“In twenty years, which of these two will have a better head of hair, even when she’s dead?” –True Fable

“A3G: This strip is nothing more than an ongoing and perpetual sequence of random and disappointing encounters. Exactly like my life, now that I think about it.” –A. Weldon Berger

“Is that really a gun, or are you just trying to arouse me? Because I have to warn you, only a prescription card will do that.” –bunivasal

“‘Sorry mommy. I didn’t dream about you last night.’ ‘Well, that explains the dry sheets!'” –SF_Reader

Dick Tracy — “Isn’t this always how it goes? You want someone to die, and then when they finally do it’s not as great as you’d hoped.”–TheDiva

Between Friends — “It’s like the Canadian Andy Capp, with coffee instead of Guinness and griping instead of fistfights.” –Rusty

Captain Savarna, Pirate Hunter — “This is simply the best comic in newspapers today. It’s slowed down a bit since the boring purple guy turned up, so I hope he leaves soon.” –Lesser Whark

Crankshaft — “Pam yells out another woman’s name while in bed with Jeff. Don’t get too excited, though.” –Artist formerly known as Ben

Funky Winkerbean — “Funky’s black PT cruiser looks like a cross between a hearse and clown car. How fitting.” –Hank

“This week, Dennis the (Not such a) Menace spring cleans his treehouse — but what sort of stuff is he tossing? Most of it is in silhouette, but among the detritus I see a rubber glove and a tiny homunculus! Was that little scamp performing abortions last summer?” –Len

The Phantom — “What a woman! I’d be blind not to notice! But she’s not Diana! Because Diana is dead, and this one is walking around and breathing and talking and stuff. Unless she’s a vampire! Or a zombie! Is there such a thing as a beautiful zombie? With a boat? She can’t be a vampire, because we’re standing out here in broad daylight — unless she’s one of those sparkly ones from that book Heloise was reading! Or was Kit reading that? I wonder who they borrowed it from; I’ll bet it was Guran! And if I were blind, shouldn’t I be Daredevil instead?” –bats:[

9 Chickweed Lane — “I’m hoping that we find out that this is all BS on Edna’s part. I’m also hoping for a pony. To hedge my bets on which one will come true, I’m buying a saddle and bridle.” –Little Guy

Spider-Man — “Peter Parker gets up late, fails to make breakfast, and reads in the paper that Iron Man has foiled Sabretooth. ‘You know what this means?’ Yes. Six more weeks of winter. Back to bed! –Muffaroo

“Meanwhile, I like to think that Dr. P’s expression in A3G is the sudden realization that the same behavior that is supposed to be endearingly kooky when Zooey Deschanel does it in a movie is, in fact, a sign of bipolar disorder in real life.” –Sebastian

“The horror that is Mr. Sam Driver’s pastel argyle sweater has been well-documented. We need say no more, except that if he had any nerve at all he would have worn a bow tie with it.” –Fashion Police

“I watched the Marmaduke trailer. Then I burst into furious, impotent tears.” –150

Also also! Faithful reader kanomi has created the fabulous Tokyo Sun Ha! Ha! Funny Pages with “Japanese-English” reimaginings of some our favorite comics. Don’t miss Nature Punchman GO! in “Epic River Quest.”

BIG HUGE ENORMOUS THANKS thanks to everyone who put cash in my tip jar over the fundraiser — you’ll all get personalized thanks from me soon! And here is where we would give thanks to our advertisers, were there any to thank! To find out more about how you could be thanked in this spot — and how you could be the launch advertiser for our new RSS feed sponsorship — click here.