Metapost: Comment of the week … but first, shameless promotion!
I’m sure you are all more than used to the shameless self-promotion on COTW night, but this is even more shameless than usual! And yet I think you will be pleased to hear it. Because today (well, Friday evening, but I missed it because I went away for the weekend) you can at long last purchase the Spider-Man 2 Rifftrax to which I contributed! It is a mere $2.99, features my voice and jokes, along with the voices and jokes of MST3K alums Bill Corbett and Kevin Murphy, and is very funny. What more do you need, another look at the fine poster art? Well, that’s done easily enough:
Now go forth and purchase, and enjoy!
(If you were away last week and are greeting this with a big fat “Huh?”, here’s the explanation.)
And speaking of promotion … you may have noticed that Gil Thorp’s huge, polyhedronical head was even larger and more terrifying than usual today:
That’s because the strip is 50 years old today! Now, since I’ve become a semi-famous blogger in the fairly small world of newspaper comics, I’ve started to receive all sorts of emails from publicists that basically boil down to “Sure, your blog is a for-profit enterprise that sells ad space, but don’t you want to help us advertise our products for free?” These almost always get deleted. And yet, when I got a Gil Thorp 50th anniversary email this morning, I did not consign it to the trash folder with the glee that I did the endless bubbling press releases I received about the Blondie 75th anniversary wank-a-thon. Do I not, after all, have a certain vested interest in the bizarre, anachronistic soap opera strips remaining solvent, against all odds?
So, here they are, fresh from Gil Thorp’s publicist to your eyes: a press release on Gil’s 50th, a somewhat hostile interview with Gil by Marty Moon on the milestone, and the really exciting one, information on the new Gil Thorp collection, Tales from the Bucket. There’s no Web site for the latter (note to Gil Thorp guys: for God’s sake, get a Web site, they’re practically free and everything) and it’s not available in stores, so to lay your hands on it, you’ll need to order it from Take Five Productions at take_five@comcast.net.
And now, with that shameless commercialism over, it’s time for the comment of the week.
“WARNING: Do not try the classic ‘got your nose’ trick with Toby. She will take it too seriously. ‘I can’t figure out how this happened! I’m not careless with my nose!’” –Joe Blevins
And the runners-up!
“Toby really needs to get to a mechanic to have herself checked out; she’s leaking robotic fluid from her cold, dead cybernetic eye.” –Joseph J. Finn
“Actually, that’s Susan Smith the childkiller. She’s been brought into the strip to give it a more uplifting tone.” –Comrade Denny
“I’m just glad Berna, as a healthworker of some vague disposition, takes health and safety seriously — if you’re going to go pinging on speed all day at work, be sure to wear a mouthguard.” –lesles
“That’s the scariest face I’ve ever seen Judy Dench make. ‘My thoughts exactly! I ALWAYS KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU’RE THINKING.’” –Hasty Penguin
“I’ve been to college, and now, as an expert on What People Who Do Drugs Can Look Like, I declare Alan disqualified, unless the drug that he’s doing is a prescription for his allergy to modern hairstyles.” –elyse
“I’m glad to see from the double 0s in front of Crankshaft’s bus number that he has been granted a license to kill.” –Renna Warren
“Nothing calms down a mother mountain lion with two cubs to protect faster than the rumble of several tons of granite boulders. Works every time.” –LITTLE A. OF THE GRAND CONCOURSE JUNGLE PATROL
“Haley is sure to make big money on the streets in her sexy, sexy Gap t-shirt.” –MsMolly
“I kind of covet Gloria’s outfit there — the retro tie-front blouse and formfitting sweater vest are very sexy secretary. I do not, however, covet Gloria’s botoxed forehead immobility, taupe lipstick, and blind faith in Sam’s skills as a detective.” –shegotzen
“The expression on Rex Morgan’s face after ‘I’m fond of your patootie’ doesn’t bother me so much as the angle the doctor assumes upon hearing it. He’s presenting like a baboon.” –Idols of Mud
“Rex Morgan, M.D.: MEANWHILE, OFF CAPE VERDE, A BUTTERFLY FLAPS ITS WINGS.” –minor flood
“Toby: ‘Oh noes! There was a charge on our card that got denied. We’ve been issued a new card and there is no extra charge or danger of any kind!’ Chinbeard: ‘Um … how did you get this number?’” –AmazingThor
“So Chinbeard is all jacked up over a speech on linguistics and pedagogy? Considering that he’s married to Toby, I guess his one true passion in life is being bored out of his skull.” –cheech wizard
And hey, big thanks go out to those who put a little cash in my tip jar! And we must give thanks to our advertisers:
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To find out more about advertising on this site, click here.
Lisa
September 8th, 2008 at 11:16 pm
Looks like I’m first….
I wonder about the new artist on GT. That guy Kaz used to have earlobes that were drawn like big button pearl earrings. This new guy seems to have taken the flak seriously and is drawing little stud earrings in Kaz’s ear. How weird and stupid.
Les of the Jungle Patrol
September 8th, 2008 at 11:24 pm
The many faces of Gil Thorp!
Kaz has always worn earrings.
Josh
September 8th, 2008 at 11:27 pm
Lisa — Oh, those earrings were all too real, as you can see in this 2004 panel (preserved for posterity by the invaluable This Week In Milford blog:
http://gilthorp.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/nice_earrings.gif
After the new artist took over, the bizarre earings vanished, but a TWIM reader wrote to the author, Neal Rubin, to demand their return, and Rubin said he’d talk to Rob Whigam (the new artist) about it. For whatever other faults Whigam has (*cough* freakish mutated hands *cough*), he not only brought the earrings back but actually made them look like the sort of earrings that a man not dressed in drag might wear.
Josh
Uncle Lumpy
September 8th, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Attention, ShanaLogic — I would buy a Rex Morgan, M.D. plushie. And I’m not alone.
Artist formerly known as Ben
September 8th, 2008 at 11:32 pm
Ah, the COTWs. Always a good time.
Re-presenting my thread-killer from yesterthread.
#32 Paul1963,
To be honest, it wouldn’t upset me if “Opus” ceased publication. While “Bloom County” had a good run during the Reagan years, the idea of carrying over a handful of characters and something like three locations hasn’t worked out. Better to go out and try something that’s actually new.
Rusty
September 8th, 2008 at 11:36 pm
The original Gil Thorp art (and depiction of Gil) was great. Gil was in his grown-out buzz cut days in this depiction, he looks like Billy Ray Cyrus
commodorejohn
September 8th, 2008 at 11:40 pm
Tales…from…the Bucket?
I MUST OWN IT.
Squid Countess
September 8th, 2008 at 11:54 pm
Gasoline Alley – Today we met a new character, the “Sultan Pepper.” *crickets wince* When is that Large Hadron Collider thing supposed to kill us all ? Is it tonight? Could it be tonight?
Rainbird
September 9th, 2008 at 12:03 am
Congrats to the CTW, and to Renna Warren, one of the float riders that I thought would at least make it that far. Very good.
Snark on.
Rainbird
September 9th, 2008 at 12:09 am
4 Uncle Lumpy
I hope you aren’t mocking Shanna Logic. I have actually bought from her and really like her stuff.
On that note, which Rex would ithe plushie be; the one from the Sunday strip being happy about June liking his patootie?
Did anyone see that Enourmoushop.com had a banner ad on this site the other day? Did anyone figure out who was doing it? If so, who was it?
Fra Bunnë, Official Comic Execrator
September 9th, 2008 at 12:12 am
Hey great comments. Congrats to all.
So one of the things I enjoy in the comments of the week is when someone else made a similar comment to me, only much, much funnier. “Presenting like a baboon”! That is awesome. Why couldn’t I have thought of that?
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 12:25 am
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Thanks, funny float riders, I really needed that. And a special salute to Joe Blevins. Wave nicely!
Uncle Lumpy
September 9th, 2008 at 12:33 am
#10 Rainbird –
From my brief fill-in work for Josh, I know how much work goes into this site, and I yield to none in my pimping of the Tip Jar.
I would never mock ShanaLogic, Enormoushop.com, or any of the other fine advertisers who keep The Comics Curmudgeon strong and independent. I unironically and sincerely want ShanaLogic to introduce a Rex Morgan, M.D. plushie.
elyse
September 9th, 2008 at 12:38 am
omgz, i’m on there! that makes my day, and my crappy day was certainly in need of making.
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 12:49 am
# 8 Squid Countess — Greetings, it’s good to see your name! Yes, the current GA storyline is egregiously horrible. It’s almost like GA and DT are having an Idiot Storyline contest. I know things are bad when MW seems almost sane by comparison.
Jack Parsons
September 9th, 2008 at 12:52 am
Nothing turns up in the site search, so I recommend the Fam Circ online comic from ShigaBooks.
And ShigaBooks in general.
BookHunter is bitchin.
Joe Btfsplk
September 9th, 2008 at 12:53 am
CotW – But, imagine the look of wonder on her face when you pull a new nose out of her ear and stick it back on!
#21 Matt (preceding thread) – I don’t understand why Keane doesn’t line Thel’s profile completely, like all of the other characters. It just plain looks weird. I never really understood the radical reshaping that was done to her head some years ago either. Her head’s outline used to resemble the kids’ melons enough to make it obvious that she had spawned them; now the larvae don’t look like either Bil or Thel, and we must speculate on whose genetic material they are carrying there. Watch for a plumber or a mailman or an encylopedia peddler with an elliptical noggin, who speeds up just a little whenever he passes by the Keane house.
Dyna
September 9th, 2008 at 1:03 am
This is slightly relevant… a painted Gil Thorp on the cover of his short lived Dell comic book.
bats :[
September 9th, 2008 at 1:04 am
Toosday Toons!
A3G: LuAnn — mind like a steel trap!
JP: if you look very closely, you’ll see the last saguaro in its natural habitat in the metro Phoenix area…
MT: sure, it might be Lyme disease, but Andy’s angling for the meatloaf, and that’ fine by me.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/9545446@N07/2841490135/sizes/o/
MW: well, I am not touching that with my Photoshop…
RMMD: good God! Rex is being dragged into the Bermuda Triangle of geriatric threesomes!
PBS: kitty!
FOOBlite: oooh, incest! Cutting edge, LJ!
Halifaxer
September 9th, 2008 at 1:46 am
“From the initial concern of how to get upperclassmen to join a losing football team to issues like divorce, alcoholism, steroids, educable mental retards, and teen pregnancy, Mr. Berrill crafted believable stories supported by finely detailed artwork that brought his characters to life.”
Gil Thorp brought finely detailed “educable mental retards” to life?
slinkimalinki
September 9th, 2008 at 1:48 am
A3G — luann, that’s not a woman’s shirt, that’s a bridesmaid’s dress. i guess whatsername gets her drug money by catering to a highly specific market.
Tim
September 9th, 2008 at 2:09 am
“Wank-a-thon” has just surpassed “foofahaha” as my new Favorite Word.
jnik
September 9th, 2008 at 2:12 am
FW: Is there NO OTHER place in Funkytown where someone can work besides the school and the pizzeria?
Uncle Lumpy
September 9th, 2008 at 2:24 am
#23 jnik –
The hospital, hospice, and cemetery.
Duh!
Spotted HØrse, Jungle Steed
September 9th, 2008 at 2:34 am
Congratulations to COTWers!
#1 Lisa:
Yes, the old earrings were either Bar Bush earrings, or Mentos… take your pick. While I’m delighted that the lobe baubles are back, I’m somewhat disappointed in Whigham’s lack of verve.
Uncle Lumpy: I, too, would totally purchase a Rex Morgan plush toy, especially now that IKEA no longer sells cuddly isopods.
AMC
September 9th, 2008 at 2:41 am
Juggs Parker – Here he comes, here comes Sam Driver – he’s an attorney with wheels
He’s a AWOL from the office and he’s gonna be chasin’ after someone.
He’s borin’ readers so it’s time for cleavage pics to arrive.
He’s busy findin’ a girl who knew Dewey when he was alive.
And when the odds are against him
And there’s dangerous work to do
You bet your life Sam Driver’s avoding Abbey too.
Go Sam Driver! Go Sam Driver! Go Sam Driver, Go!
He’s off and flyin’ as he golfs around getting the book contract
He’s flying off to Carefree like he’s never comin’ back
Sweater puppy’s waitin’ just ahead!
Go Sam Driver! Go Sam Driver! Go Sam Driver, Go!
RMMD – Tweeker and the Sea Hag – It’s either a failed NBC pilot or a Popeye arc from 1957.
MW Home?, home?, she’s deranged.
Where the fear and the identi-dope stay.
Where seldom is heard
An intelligent word
And the walls are peach colored all day.
Mibbitmaker
September 9th, 2008 at 2:46 am
9/9 (played by Barbara/Feldon):
A3G: Stop it, LuAnn. Not now! Not after weeks of chowder-headed Toby Cameron antics! Please, LuAnn — Stop it now!
BBlues: Rex Morgan works there, right?
DtM: I didn’t know they made post-1964 Bugs Bunnys back when!
DT: Smooth manner?? THAT guy?!!
Re-FOOB: Okay, that’s kinda wrong…!
GT: Marty Moon must’ve gotten wind of Gil’s plan to have him killed. Now Marty has a food taster working for him.
MT: Tom Batiuk is ghost-writing this one, and he always wanted to write a Bambi’s mother scene. This time, it’s deer cancer!
Big Furshlugginer Dog: Homeland Security put Marm on the No-Fly List. ‘Bout time, too!
MW, panel one: Much as I hate fat jokes, I have to say: When they said ol’ Chinbeard was full of himself, they weren’t kiddin’, brudda!
MW, panel 2: “At home?” (pause) “Hey, Toby, I can’t hear exagerated, toothy grins with little sweat beads and hand-behind-the-back whistling with your eyes straining skyward while walking suspiciously on tippy-toe over the phone, y’know!”
OBH: “That’s his pick-up truck, Can’t you even get that one right, Ruthie? Also, we have to have a lesson on how vandalism is uncool. Also about how bad something is when the genders are reversed in such a case. And rock is better than country…” Ruthie (thinking): “I wish Liz Patterson was my teacher!”
PBS: Ladies and gentlemen: John F. Kitty!
Popeye: That kid gets his head banged up more often that Jerry Ford!
SH: Aw, just laugh it off like Mrs. Butterworth in that Geicko commercial (I love that one!).
Alfred E. Neuman
September 9th, 2008 at 2:51 am
Tuesday snarking
A3G— A woman’s shirt? It looks more like a nightie to me. She probably won’t check it for stains, either. Denial is such a powerful defense mechanism, but that’s our LuAnn.
FOOB— Connie Poirier, recipient of “abstinence only” sex education.
GT— C’mon, Marty, you flubbed your line. You were supposed to have said, “And as usual, dealing with Gil Thorp is like dealing with Raul Castro.”
Luann— “Good idea, Mom, even though the anal bleaching won’t hurt much, those clitoral piercings can really sting.”
MW— I have no snark, but I was looking forward to what bats :[ would do with panel one. Now she says (#19) that she won’t touch it. Oh, go ahead, bats :[, touch it!
TB Tabby
September 9th, 2008 at 3:03 am
A3G: Yes and no, LuAnn. He’s actually avoiding you because you’re an insufferable ditz.
Baldo: Ha ha, it’s funny because he did more work by doing something…plausible…that would…alow him to…do more work.
BB: I’ve got news for you, Pvt. Tokenasian: that’s not meat loaf. Tom Batiuk is guest-writing this story arc.
Blondie: “I’m sorry, Dagwood. I can’t let you do that.”
DT: “I just won second place in the annual William Howard Taft Lookalike contest!”
GT: To drive the point home, Gil exiled Marty Moon to the Milford High gulag.
H&J: When forced to make a minor, inconsequential decision, go hungry instead.
H&L: ‘Not only that, but it’s made of blacktop and passenger jets land on it!”
MG&G: “…He just does bad Jon Belushi impressions.”
“THAT’S WORSE!”
MT: Poor girl’s so upset, she forgot how to use contractions!
PBS: This would’ve been funnier if the cat’s fur was styled into a blonde mohawk.
Popeye: Swee’pea’s death was tragic, but everyone at the funeral agreed it was preferable to another “head-trauma-induced mind control powers” story arc.
SM: Oh look, a Spider-Man story where Spider-Man is framed for a crime and becomes a wanted man. Almost as original as the Batman comic where the Joker goes on a killing spree.
Ziggy: What happened? Did Comedy Central decide to cancel Mind of Mencia?
pepperoni détournées
September 9th, 2008 at 3:17 am
OK, I always love the comments of the week, but I’m pretty sure they are even funnier than usual this week! Thanks! I needed that!
BenG
September 9th, 2008 at 3:29 am
FOOB- Lawrence is like a younger version of his father? I guess this explains why the relationship didn’t work out.
Sheila Sternwell
September 9th, 2008 at 4:30 am
Congrats everyone!
A3G: I base all my fashion choices on this strip. Excuse me while I go purchase some fine magenta tutus for my winter wardrobe.
GT: And as usual, Marty Moon is taping his show in the neighbor’s basement while recovering from his most recent 3-week bender.
MW: With Professor Chinbeard lying prone on the bed, you know what tomorrow’s strip will be: the phone sex.
I’ll be in the bomb shelter until this storyline blows over. No pun.
Trilobite
September 9th, 2008 at 6:03 am
If Ahab and Moby Dick had ever consummated their tragic romance, and if that night of heaving cetacean passion had produced a son, and if that son had lived long enough to earn (and apparently use the hell out of) his senior’s discount at the Santa Royale Denny’s, I can’t help but think that the result would look like Ian in panel one of Tuesday’s Mary Worth.
On the bright side, Giella is now a total lock for the “Least Sexy Pinup Pose” category at the next syndicated comics awards ceremony.
gleeb
September 9th, 2008 at 6:38 am
Dick: Tracy called Diet back to his desk, away from the top secret door, just to ask him that? ULQ!
‘bean: When Montoni’s calls, no one can refuse it, thus Neurotic Henry (or whatever), must do this stupid thing.
Gil: Well, Coach Thorp did have Elmer forcefully moved from his native Mexico to Kalamazoo.
H&J: Jamaal took one too many elbows to the head in his NBA days, and is unable to do math in his head anymore.
H&L: As someone who’s going to be looking for a Baltimore rowhouse this Spring, I remain unimpressed.
Duck: What’s with the red arrow? Why is that desk being so assiduously pointed out to me? Or was Brucie worried that, after my public-school education, I wouldn’t know to read the whole strip?
Pluggers: …own dogs that could easily be mistaken for their idiot offspring.
Popeye: Soon Swee’ Pea won’t be able to do math in his head, either. Why does whoever writes this so love battering an infant’s noggin?
Shoe: Not bad, but a better gag would have been “we’re all too young to register.”
John C Fremont
September 9th, 2008 at 7:03 am
Joe Blevins made me laugh!
Foob – Ew!
MT – Is that sad-sack guy Shirley’s husband? Is this going to involve a duck?
PBS – Hey, that’s not Coleman Francis! That’s a kitty!
Phantom – Speaking of the stars of Red Zone Cuba, the correct version of that Old Jungle Saying was said by John Carradine in The Shootist; “The early worm gets the bird.”
RMMD – Ollie Tweaks… I thought you and he were… you know… “doing it.”
JP – “With a pickle mind we kicked the nipple beer, steady as we go, we’re flying over trout…”
DT – Hal Holbrook is Mark Twain as Diet Smith in “Dick Tracy’s Dumbest Story Ever Told.” Coming September 9th to a fish wrapping near you.
From the looks of the guy today, I’d say his nickname must be “All Bacon” Diet. Or “All Binge, No Purge” Diet. Or “I’m Too Pathetic To Even Try To Go On A” Diet. Or “I’m Big Boned” Smith.
Mel
September 9th, 2008 at 7:26 am
32: Sheila Sternwell, had that thought myself. I did not like where the line of questioning was going…
“How are things at home? Mmmmmhmmm … what are you doing? Reeling on the couch? Good, good … what do you have on? … Nothing but the computer? Oh, I like that … Tell Daddy how you are going to pay back that $1.09 … yes, yes … now say I’m your pedagogue … say it! say it! … yes, yes … most fascinating! Ah!”
One-eyed Wolfdog
September 9th, 2008 at 7:29 am
H&J continues its philosophical streak today with a strip based on the paradox of Buridan’s ass. Like so many abstract philosophical thought experiments, it is not generally held to be a laff riot. But if Jamaal starves to death, it will have served its purpose.
Dr. Mabuse
September 9th, 2008 at 7:51 am
FBOFW – So it WASN’T just the final year of FBOFW that was the problem; it’s ALWAYS been like this! From the very first, Connie was the wimpy Elly-cheerleader, and even the conversations have stayed the same – “Daughter…married…Mother of the Bride…Lawrence (boo hoo!)…poor me…you’re so lucky…mew, mew, mew…”
Whippersnapper
September 9th, 2008 at 8:19 am
A3G- No, LuAnn, he’s avoiding you because you’re dumb and annoying.
Muffaroo-who-walks
September 9th, 2008 at 8:29 am
Go Joe! Way to show everybody that an understated comment at the end of a moribund thread can still, by its sheer rightness, ascend to the top of the CC float and kill. Congrats to everybody else as well, including my personal favorites, Comrade Denny and Renna Warren.
No, I’m not crying. Why would I be crying?
Little Guy
September 9th, 2008 at 8:30 am
Curtis: Oh for Glorioski’s Sake, Billingsly, just show Curtis gaped at in his underwear by the store crowd and get it over with. We know the Saturday punchline is going to be about low-rider jeans.
Muffaroo-who-walks
September 9th, 2008 at 8:31 am
ps: Personal favorite runners-up, that is. Just clarifying.
Angry Kem
September 9th, 2008 at 8:32 am
Hail to all the funny people canonised above!
Oh, you silly little Foob retcon. What a silly little Foob retcon you are. Yes, you. I adore the way you have defanged Connie. Why not go adorably lazy and dash out a strip without checking for unfortunate connotations of, you know, incest? That’s the way! You’re so cute! I could just pinch your sweet wittle history-destroying cheeks!
In other news, Prof Ian is still working himself up into a frenzy over his frickin’ linguistics conference. You go, Prof Ian.
Justafoob
September 9th, 2008 at 8:39 am
Oh Connie, Connie, Connie. You always wanted a daughter and you wound up with a son who looks like the bastard who impregnated you and then split.
What are you going to do?
Dress him in women’s clothing and have him hang around in bars?
Harry Worth
September 9th, 2008 at 8:40 am
Thank goodness Toby messed up at home and is going to steer the conversation that way because Ian is getting all settled in for a phone sex masturbation session.
Thank god for Enormoushop.
Tweeks_Coffee
September 9th, 2008 at 8:47 am
A3G: So 5 years later, Luann finally starts to figure it out. How long before she realizes that she hasn’t been picking up drink straws all day?
‘Shaft: Normally this probably wouldn’t be a big deal. This being the Funkyverse, though, I assume the car has cancer.
DT: Who’s that beast in the back of the first panel and will it be having a featured part?
FC: What? Also; THAT BIRD IS HORRIFYING!
GT: Marty Moon has a weekly TV show? Where he talks about roughly the same stuff he does on his radio show? I figured Milford was boring, but Jesus Christ. I see Jeff Ponczak got his hands on the Queen of Diamond’s gem from a couple DT storylines ago.
MT: Rule #1 of being outdoors; If you see a sick or wounded animal, pick it up immediately. The fact that the Trail family’s major entertainment appears to be watching Mark eat still creeps me out. A lot.
MW: Oh my God. There are no words.
Phantom: I like the contrast between the revolution storylines in this strip and PBS.
Brick Bradford
September 9th, 2008 at 8:52 am
For some reason I find the last panel of Tuesday’s Dick Tracy funny. Put the emphasis on the last word and maybe you will, too.
Romi Kumu
September 9th, 2008 at 8:56 am
Congratulations to all the float riders!
#20Halifaxer:
I’m glad someone else caught the “educable mental retards” bit. I’ve worked in social services so my first thought was: can they write that?!? (The current pc phrase of the week for retardation would be “cognitively disabled”)
My second was, well I guess it’s not just the strip… the whole Gil Thorpe staff is stuck in the fifties. Maybe when you’re first hired they send you away for a weeks worth of
brainwashingtraining and when you come back all you can say is “Gee wilikers everyone! The 50s sure are swell!”Edgy DC
September 9th, 2008 at 9:21 am
My word. Even their press releases are anachronistic.
“From the initial concern of how to get upperclassmen to join a losing football team to
issues like divorce, alcoholism, steroids, educable mental retards, and teen pregnancy,
Mr. Berrill… .”
Want to know why Miss Peach and Luther and Winnie Winkle don’t continue to appear on comics pages today? No issues like “educable mental retards.” You go, Gil.
poppinjay
September 9th, 2008 at 9:24 am
I get those press releases by the gig. The latest is Ford really wants an interview by our pitiful little media enterprise on why their racing development team is crucial to America.
Patrick, Interlibrary Loan Lending Division
September 9th, 2008 at 9:28 am
Crankshaft Gahhh!!!! All of this over reacting to a check engine light. In post 1995 cars with the OBDII computers, something as simple as not tightening the gas cap fully can set off the check engine light. Gahhh!!!
The Spectacular Spider-Brick
September 9th, 2008 at 9:40 am
And now it’s time for SNARK… IN… SPAAAACE!
A3G: How nice of the crack-addled druggies to put their laundry in the hamper.
Archie: Maybe he would have believed you if you hadn’t said “STRAIN.”
BB: Sarge is hosting an alien embryo! AAAH!!!
Blondie: And thus was SkyNet born.
(WT)DT: Braces hires his thugs at the Star Trek convention. Look, it’s Tom Paris!
FC: In the Keaneiverse, even the birds are hydrocephalic.
GA: “Sultan Pepper! Who’s he?” “He’s this plotline’s offensive stereotype!”
thorps.“And as usual, Coach Thorp once again refuses to reveal his coaching strategy or his team’s weaknesses so I can broadcast them for all to hear. Just like a fascist! My next guest is Valerie Plame. Now Val, what is it you do for a living?”MT: “I’m afraid not, honey! She’s got DEERverticulitis! Heh heh… Honey? C’mon, it was a joke! Don’t start cry… awww, shit.”
Big Dog: Why do I get the impression Brad started out drawing something else, spilled his ink on the bristol board, realized he didn’t have time to start over, made the blacked-out area look vaguely like the rear end of a helicopter, and then came up with this caption?
MW: “Speaking of tricks, you would not believe the things Chicago hook… uh… is hooked on! They really love their thin-crust pizza here, it’s really, ha ha!, it’s really something! Ha ha. Sooo, uh, how are things at home?”
One-Eyed Sailor: This storyline has me hooked on its realism, because, as I said yesterday, NASA scientists would totally transport a gigantic moon boulder that probably cost billions of dollars to get down to Earth in the first place on the open bed of a pickup truck driven down a twisty mountain path with no railing.
Shoe: “The biggest vote-getter was ‘Poop,’ which wasn’t even on the ballot. Well, except for little Timmy Roberts’.”
SFx: Who knew that Kessler Syndrome would be precipitated by a fish skeleton?
Overhead Cam
September 9th, 2008 at 9:45 am
#51 — that is the problem with check engine lights today, it could mean the gas cap is not on right or your timing belt is broken and you have just tossed a rod. Engineering as done by Drabble.
Patrick, Interlibrary Loan Lending Division
September 9th, 2008 at 9:48 am
FoobReboot Must. Not. Look. The squick factor is off the scale. The reboot will be similar to the atrocity committed by the producers of the first three seasons of Star Trek Enterprise against the original Star Trek. Unlike my beloved original Star Trek, FOOB was always bad, now it’s going to be much worse.
Mr. Coffee Nerves
September 9th, 2008 at 9:57 am
MW: I get the impression that just off-camera to the viewer’s right there are two impatient male prostitutes worrying that their shrimp scampi thongs will wilt before Professor Chinbeard finishes his phone call, and their tips will suffer.
Mr. Plow
September 9th, 2008 at 10:03 am
MT: …and so begins the exciting month-long Chronic Wasting Disease plotline!
Artist formerly known as Ben
September 9th, 2008 at 10:07 am
9/9
JP: Sam doesn’t really seem to get the whole “leave things to the police” concept. He is, however, once again channeling the “outrageousness” of Jim McMahon circa 1985.
RMMD: “Two timing bige bum” sounds like a phrase George Lucas would make up. I do like the idea of Rex as go-between of two cranky geriatric lovers, though.
MW: If Ian loosens his belt while he’s on the phone with Toby I am so out of here.
9CL: Look on the bright side, Isabel. You’re sharing a bed with the most lovingly depicted box of tissues in comicdom.
DT: “So to sum up: High tech. Brute force. Show dentalwork. Any questions?”
PBS: It’s too bad Pastis hasn’t come to an agreement with Garry Trudeau. I’d love to see the Guard Duck storm Habana with Duke Harris.
Popeye: Do you know what you’ve done, man? You’ve doomed us all to another boring month of “bonkus of the konkus” and “royal head power.”
Luann: I’m not sure if the deGroots are doing some kind of reverse psychology gambit or are just really weak-ass parents. Not that having a tattoo is the worst thing in the world, but such a blatant cave-in can’t be good.
FC: Wow. Mama bird there is big enough to carry Jeffy off in the middle of the night. Say, that might be a larf.
FB: I giggled at this today. Is there something wrong with me?
GT: If there is one thing to love on today’s comics page, it’s the image of Marty Moon on the set of his public access talk show, tossing out insane comparisons in the hope that someone will call in.
S-M: Hey Peter, that’s some pretty swift deductive work. You sure you don’t need to lie down for a while?
SFx: Something tells me there’s a sad story behind the hammer and workboot floating freely in space.
S4th: “A private person with undefined boundaries.” I like that.
DtM: Since there aren’t many TV shows featuring six-foot bunnies that run at 1AM, I can only guess that Dennis stumbled on a movie channel showing of “Donnie Darko.” Let’s hope he regains some of his menace by cussing out his health teacher.
OBH: Congratulations, Carrie Underwood. You’ve managed to push Ruthie to new hieghts of insanity. Well, for this month at least.
cheech wizard
September 9th, 2008 at 10:12 am
Cool, a ride on the float! And congrats to Joe Blevins, who definitely earned the top spot this week.
Re: Crankshaft, the Car Talk guys once had a tip on how to fix a “check engine” light – put a piece of electrical tape over it. In other words, don’t worry about it.
Skullturf Q. Beavispants
September 9th, 2008 at 10:16 am
37 One-eyed Wolfdog — Nice one.
That’s actually not the first allusion to Buridan’s ass in the funny pages.
John
September 9th, 2008 at 10:23 am
I find it interesting that in the interview with Marty Moon, Jack Berrill and Neil Rubin are explicitly cited by Gil as writers whose work he enjoys, while neither Jerry Jenkins nor his son/uncredited ghostwriter Chad Rubin are mentioned at all, either in the interview or the press release.
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 10:27 am
# 34 gleeb — I thought that WAS his offspring. I wasted at least two minutes of my life that I’ll never get back, puzzling over why even a bizarre hybrid Pluggers character would name his son “Boy.” Then I realized the insane truth. It’s going to take some serious chocolate and possibly a little early drinking to restore my peace of mind.
CanuckDownSouth
September 9th, 2008 at 10:27 am
So RetroramaFOOB is now in full retcon swing. Of course, it won’t be enough to have Connie say “I said we were married” about Pablo, LJ, there’s the small matter that Lawrence’s dad was established in-strip to have left to go back to Brazil. Lawrence was not an unknown love-child. End log.
Presumably more dialogue will be tweaked when Lizzie asks about Lawrence’s daddy (oh please let the FOOBacle not last that long…)
Good writing would take the limitations already established and work with those constraints – there are plenty of good stories with an absent divorced father – errgh [/rant]
Rainbird
September 9th, 2008 at 10:34 am
31 BenG
I think this Foob is one of the rewritten ones, as I don’t recall Connie ever talking about the guy she slept with when she was in South America. It was only mentioned in the FOOB books in text, where Lynn was explaining everyones background.
I guess when you get to rewrite, you write these things in.
Blech
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 10:35 am
FC — Not content with their previous mockeries of biology and physics, the Keanes now decide it’s time to suspend a bird nest in the air with no visible means of support, and occupy it with horrifying “birds” such as Nature never knew.
Idols of Mud
September 9th, 2008 at 10:38 am
I’m in COTW! Awesome! Thanks Josh, and thanks for the kind words, Frau (#11).
Nothing to add, really. Mallard Fillmore today may have finally crossed the line dividing shrill right-wing commentary from incoherent babbling and random firing at people on one’s lawn.
cheech wizard
September 9th, 2008 at 10:47 am
I think that “retard” comment from the Gil Thorpe press release must have been a cut-and-paste job from an earlier summary or press release done decades ago. Probably put together by a clueless summer intern with no sense of propriety.
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 10:51 am
# 56 Mr. Plow — CWD was my first wild hope, but then I remembered that this is MT, where actual relevant outdoor issues are shoved aside in favor of tame bears and lost puppies. I hope you are right, but I doubt it. More likely the deer has serious emotional issues and will bond with a cute but deranged woodchuck.
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 10:52 am
MW — Good God.
Artist formerly known as Ben
September 9th, 2008 at 10:53 am
#22 Tim,
“Wank-a-thon” is a pretty enticing word, I’ll give you that.
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 10:54 am
# 68 — I now withdraw what I said about MW in # 15.
Hank
September 9th, 2008 at 10:55 am
RE: Crankshaft. I’m no mechanic, but whenever my car’s “check engine” light is on, both the manual and mechanic tell me that it’s either (a) a loose gas cap: (b) a minor problem with the catalytic converter that, in no way, renders the car undriveable. I guess in the Batuikverse it means the car has cancer.
RE: Judge Parker. I guess Sam was sick the day they taught “obstructing governmental administration” in law school.
Hogenmogen
September 9th, 2008 at 11:06 am
If you look in the second panel, you may notice that the starting position of the car was clearly halfway on the sidewalk. So really, fake Spiderman is technically fighting crime, whereas real Spiderman merely watches.
Dingo
September 9th, 2008 at 11:18 am
Bats #124, 2 threads back:
I’m not sure how a Rex Morgan, MD slot machine would go over with the gaming public. However, I think a Mark Trail video slot with images of Molly the Bear, Cherry, Kelly Welly, Rusty “Benjamin Button” Trail, and the horny beavers (not Cherry and Kelly but Lucky and wife) would be a hoot. How would you get Mark’s fist o’ justice into a bonus round?
Dingo
September 9th, 2008 at 11:21 am
This morning I saw an image of Ian Cameron lying on his back on a Chicago hotel bed and all I could think of was those brave souls who help push beached whales back into the water. It must get tiresome for him when he’s next to the Charterstone pool with all the good-natured meddlers about.
Mumbles
September 9th, 2008 at 11:28 am
You know who we should send a Rex Morgan plushie to? Alex Trebek.
Jobiska
September 9th, 2008 at 11:36 am
OBH: I had been lulled into complacency by Ruthie’s not hopelessly mangling any chance at a pun for several months…I should have known yesterday’s irritating misunderstanding (where the woman surely said “I want to do light HOUSEkeeping,” so how could Ruthie have heard it as LIGHThouse keeping”?) was just the precursor to something worse. Today was the cruelest cut of all…that awful vengeful song has now been stuck in my head for at least two hours and counting. ARGH!
Dik-Dik Vendetta
September 9th, 2008 at 11:48 am
It might be just me, but doesn’t it seem like “Educable Mental Retards” would be a better title for the eponymous Gil Thorpe?
dreadedcandiru2
September 9th, 2008 at 11:51 am
#62 : CDS — Presumably more dialogue will be tweaked when Lizzie asks about Lawrence’s daddy (oh please let the FOOBacle not last that long…)
I should think that the syndicate might step in by then and put a stop to things.
Joseph J. Finn
September 9th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Holy crap, I came in second?!?
commodorejohn
September 9th, 2008 at 11:56 am
A3G – No, Luann, that’s Alan’s. There’s something he hasn’t been telling you.
Crankshaft – I guess we shouldn’t be mocking Jeff’s TOTAL ABSOLUTE DESPAIR. After all, this is the Winkerverse. Driving around with a “check engine” light on is just begging to have your car stall on you in the middle of an intersection just in time for you to be T-boned by your father-in-law’s school bus. (This being Ed Crankshaft, he will undoubtedly make some wry malapropism as paramedics extricate your battered and broken corpse from the wreckage.)
DTM – That’s not menacing. This is menacing.
DT – Man, I could watch this guy boast about how he’s going to one-up the police for like, three weeks straight. And since this is Dick Tracy, that’s precisely what will happen.
GA – WILL THIS STUPID STORYLINE JUST END ALREADY
GT – Oh man, did Marty just brighten my morning.
H&L – You know, I’d honestly rather see this strip making dorky real estate jokes than more of the HA HA MIDDLE-CLASS SUBURBAN FAMILY jokes that have been run into the ground by a hundred other strips.
Marmaduke – What do you think the odds are that Paul Andersen just spilled coffee across the page and decided to make the best of it?
MT – Oh Lord, is that Homer? I guess this means that Luke Wilson, Wanted Man, Puppies For Madeline, and Kelly’s Movie took about…six or seven years, Trail-Time. Sure felt like it.
MW – Breakdown in T-minus five seconds…
PBS – Holy crap. Look out, Raul.
Popeye – Oh God dammit.
SM – “Everyone will think he’s the real Spidey! That means people will quit expecting me to capture supervillains in the middle of Oprah!”
CanuckDownSouth
September 9th, 2008 at 11:59 am
dreadedcandiru2-78 We can only hope. Unfortunately, given the zombie existence of things like FC, I have my doubts. LynnCo may maintain enough of a support base to keep enough newspapers with FOOB to satisfy the syndicate, even if it’s not as big as before.
Cornwhacker
September 9th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
From the fabulous Gil Thorp / Marty Moon interview:
I had to read this sentence 3 or 4 times before I realized Gil wasn’t referring to himself as a “perennial cellar dweller”.
Also, for some reason, this cracks me up:
Plus! A shoutout to Brick House!
CanuckDownSouth
September 9th, 2008 at 12:05 pm
Oh, and I was so incensed about retcon-o-ramaFOOB, that I forgot to say this about A3G:
Future Luann dialogue: “Oh, Alan, I should never have doubted you! I’m so relieved – it’s only drugs. Just as long as you’re not going out with another girl. Of course you can let your customers stay over – I completely trust you! Why, this whole misunderstanding has been all my fault. Here’s some more seed money for your side business.”
She’s almost as bad as Lobotomized Liz.
Hogenmogen
September 9th, 2008 at 12:07 pm
I’m geting used to the lack of specificity in H&J, so much so that I almost forgot to ask not for the brand names of those two competing cans, but what actual substance we were discussing. Hair gel is out.
Anyway, Heathcliff’s panel is a model of specific references. At first I thought it was a generic “Fish Market”. But no! It is a promotion for ELITE (fancy font) Fish Market!
I also noticed that the motion lines on Heath’s foot make it appear as if he is moving backwards. His tail continues its forward jaunt.
Now about those anachronistic hats…
gnome de blog
September 9th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
If there was ever anyone, fictional or otherwise, who cried out for a Mary Worth meddle job, it’s Toby Cameron. God put her in Charterstone for a reason.
Hogenmogen
September 9th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Fat Ian and his bloated crotch lying back in come-hither pose is about the last thing I wanted to see staring back at me from the comics pages this morning – or any morning, afternoon or evening.
Toeby: At home?
Say it with me CCers – “I have no hooooome!” Sob sob.
Hogenmogen
September 9th, 2008 at 12:16 pm
Foob: How could Elle not know that her best friend wasn’t married? Or, more fitting of the Patterson M.O., did she bring it up just to show how much better of a parent she was?
When Connie leaves, Elle, Mike and Liz do the superiority dance.
Or, they may not even wait for Connie and Lawrence to leave.
Gabacho
September 9th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
Mary Worth – Ian: “I am attending a seminar this afternoon on pedagogy called STFU: A Guide For The Loquacious. I imagine STFU stands for System To Further Understanding. It’s very popular. Everyone says it to me. I fact I sent Mary a postcard with only STFU written on it. That should pique her interest.”
Sally Forth – Ted is definitely a Ramones guy. All Strategic Sourcing people are, although I would have thought his track of choice was “I Wanna Be Sedated”
Pearls Before Swine and Get Fuzzy – I’m coming out of the closet here. (Move over, Rex. I want out.) I hate these strips.
They are both Family Circus with a soul patch.
Incomprehensible doesn’t mean hip.
Hogenmogen
September 9th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
Luann: Alan! This is a woman’s shirt!
Alan: No, I’m a cross dressing druggie.
Luann: Whew, so long as you’re not cheating on me.
And, Luann thinks that is why Alan has been avoiding her. No, Alan has been avoiding her because he’s a man and this is A3G. All the men take unexplained absences and are generally aloof. Eric got a story line of his own, but he’s always dropping a hot date with Margo for mysterious purposes. Gary was knocking on Tommie’s door until they started dating, now you don’t see either of them. Alan took a leave of absence for something like six months and it still has never really been explained where he went or why.
Orange Doorhinge
September 9th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
MW: Woah! Chinbeard pretty much tells Toby how boring life with her is. Throw him back in the gutter, Toby! Don’t wait till he forgets *your* birthday! And absolutely, don’t mention the ID theft fiasco.
Dingo
September 9th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
Toby Cameron: Janice Ian’s At Seventeen brought to comic strip life.
gnome de blog
September 9th, 2008 at 12:33 pm
Marty Moon said:
Which just proves that it’s still 1958 in Milford.
Next week: Marty is hustled off to Lubyanka prison to have the soles of his feet flogged.
Orange Doorhinge
September 9th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
MW Chinbeard: Being with other Professors in an academic environment has really opened my eyes! I”M SO GLAD YOU DIDN’T COME!
Hogenmogen
September 9th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
He who owns the boat gets the umbrella IN MY PANTS.
I got the idea from the way the teacher’s union treats me IN MY PANTS.
Dealing with Gil Thorp is like dealing with the Kremlin IN MY PANTS.
An hour later, Dewey was dead IN MY PANTS.
Red Greenback
September 9th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
Congrats to my favorite band, Joe and the Floaters!
MW: Ladies and Gentlemen, Professor Ian “Cameltoe” Cameron.
FWinkbean: Ah, the “check engine” light, invented by Herb & Jamaal.
Gil (above): Classic Gil looks like he paid “Jones” a visit, and now he’s feeling “super”. -Kookie, lend me your comb!
Mark! Trail!: Well, it seems things are settling back into normalcy after the “Pilsbury Incident”
northwest transplant
September 9th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
The Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel,my hometown paper,following recent layoffs,introduced its new streamlined”Cue” (Entertainment & Living)section today. I note that FOOB,which was prominently displayed on page 1 above the fold in Sunday’s color comics,is now MIA. Good job,J-S editors! So long FBOFW!
Pop Culture Gangster
September 9th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
The “Tales From the Bucket” press release states that Gil Thorp is “the longest running sports serial strip in history.” Umm.. How many sports serial comic strips ARE there?
Oh – and if you’re going to do a press release, for the love of god, use the grammar checker in MS Word. “Inquiry’s” isn’t a real word. It sounds like a very unfortunate name for for a very bad theme bar: “Welcome to Inquiry’s – sit yourself down in your electro-shock chair until you tell us what you want to drink.”
150
September 9th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
Re: The press release: I thought the moniker “ageless wonder” and the declaration “Character development has always been my prime aim, Mimi!” were amazing, but when I got to “educable mental retards” I almost choked on my lunch. Was the press release written fifty years ago just in case the strip made it this far?
Hogenmogen
September 9th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
Suburban Hell: I’m still trying to figure out this joke. Some houses do have large back yards and small front yards. I’m pretty sure I’m not missing anything funny except the client’s 1975 ‘fro-hair.
Jim Thorp(e)
September 9th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Gil has buried all other sports serial strips.
The worst one was when Gil took the football team over to the links and beat Mac Divot senseless with a nine iron.
Man those were the days when there was real he-man action in the comix.
fashion police
September 9th, 2008 at 12:50 pm
LuAnn will never believe it’s Alan’s shirt. Even she knows he needs a higher neckline.
Too bad. It would be a much better story if it really was Alan’s.
Fra. Bunnë, Official Comic Execrator
September 9th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
A3G – I dunno why, but when I saw other people’s remarks today about “a woman’s shirt”, I pictured an oxford with buttons on the left, and maybe, maybe some discreet darts. Luanne would say, “Zounds! This shirt buttons up in the female style!” and hijinks would ensue. Then I checked the comic, and no, the shirt in question is some sort of ludicrous frilly hot pink camisole. Eek! So much for subtlety. Anyway, I doubt it’s Haley’s, since all we ever see her wear is a simple shift. It must be Alan’s. Please let it be Alan’s. Please.
Fra. Bunnë, Official Comic Execrator
September 9th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
99, Hogenmogen
I think “a house on an acre” implies that the house is on a spacious lot and not wedged between two other houses, as this one is. What good is a whole acre if your neighbors can still watch you pee? How big is an acre anyway?
Batman Beatles
September 9th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
#44 Justafoob – You mean like that crazy aunt in Sleepaway Camp? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleepaway_Camp
Annon
September 9th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
RMMD Mr. Tweaks?? Isn’t that the name of the mouse in The Green Mile??
Artist formerly known as Ben
September 9th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
GF: Thank God Bucky is off the Olympics. Beyond that, Rudy Giuliani will be disappointed this didn’t come up in time for the convention. Didn’t he try to ban ferrets in NYC?
FOOB: There’s something seriously not right here.
Marion Delgado
September 9th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Alas, someone misinformed Ian about what both “linguistics” and “pedagogy” mean, hence his passion. Further deponent sayeth not.
Calico
September 9th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
FOOB – Pablo Cruisin?
3G – Luann- *ahem* – that shirt doesn’t belong to another woman. Catch my drift, dear?
MT – I see the slab of bacon made it back to the Trail table safely.
MW – Ian, please don’t ever pose like that again. My eyes are scarred for life now.
“Home? What? Where am I? Huh?”
Seismic-2
September 9th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
’shaft
When you take your car in for maintenance, don’t the mechanics set the engine computer to make the engine warning idiot light turn on 5000 miles later, when it’s time for them to sell you some more stuff? When ir does come on, I just turn it off, by holding down the odometer toggle button while turning the ignition off and on. Or something like that; do a Google and you can find the trick. This strip makes no sense.
Oh sorry, I forgot what strip we were talking about. Of course it makes no sense. Never mind.
Calico
September 9th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
#101 & 102 – Sorry – I came to the party a bit late!
Now, where did I put my bottle?
Calico
September 9th, 2008 at 1:19 pm
Oh, and here’s a primo Bechdel rant about the FOOB That Never Died:
http://www.dykestowatchoutfor.com/index.php
Joe Blevins
September 9th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Wow, comment of the week! I’m honored.
I trust the tiara and sash will be delivered shortly…?
lesles
September 9th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
MW – you know, if this wasn’t mary worth, where such nasty downtown-women’s-shelter things don’t happen to the fine, upstanding main characters (they’re outlawed under the
friendshipnon-reciprocal acquaintance contracts they’ve signed with mary – and they’ve all seen enough to know how risky breach of contract would be), i’d say chinbeard’s working his way ’round to telling toby she’s dumped and he’s not coming home.bats :[
September 9th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
32. Sheila Sternwell re MW: I don’t think Chinbeard lying on the bed is so much a harbinger of the phone sex as it is of the room service.
Alfred E. Newman: thanks for the vote of confidence, but I don’t think there’s enough pasty pinkish-white pixels in my PhotoShop box to do Ian justice (such as it is). Just lie back, close your eyes, and imagine Trilobite’s (33.) supposition of that one glorious night of sweet, krill-flavored love between Ahab and the great white whale…
(yeah, I know sperm whales (snrf!) don’t eat krill…)
73. Dingo: how about having Mark’s FoJ punching out a variety of bad guys (poachers, trappers, puppy kidnappers, litterers, bears who shit in the woods)? Yeah, you’re right, though — a “nature-themed” slot like Mark Trail would probably be a winner, considering I have seen “Dam Beavers” on my last trip to Vegas…
75. Mumbles: …and we all know what the note on the gift card would read…
Rob
September 9th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
No, people will not assume that guy is Spiderman because he is actually doing something, not sitting around watching TV, kinda like you are doing right now.
Global H
September 9th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Hey Josh, is that you live-blogging the Apple event in San Fran, for Engadget??
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
# 97 Pop Culture Gangster — You owe me a keyboard.
bats :[
September 9th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
105. Annon: I think that was Mr. Jingles. But he’s the Yacht Club’s very old mascot…
28. Alfred E. Neuman: all right. NSFOWS. You’ve been warned. Folks, please direct all complaints to Mr. Neuman.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/9545446@N07/2843748638/sizes/o/
Motorposus
September 9th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
MW: The color, yardage and drape of the fabric of Dr. Cameron’s pants remind me of the kind of tarp used to cover swimming pools. If he doesn’t lie perfectly still, his wife’s painful confession will be lost in the din of crinkling plastic.
Calico
September 9th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
#118 – Bats – that’s not safe to look at anywhere, any time! Hahaha!
commodorejohn
September 9th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
#118 bats :[ – I’m hearing that as Roger Waters in “Several Species Of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together In A Cave And Grooving With A Pict.”
Motorposus
September 9th, 2008 at 2:13 pm
118. bats :[ – Okay, that’s much scarier than the pants, but somehow more nicely rendered!
Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)
September 9th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
Work it, Chinbeard! Talk about fanservice! Give us what we CRAVE! The only thing that could make Ian sexier is if he was holding a kitten!
Dik-Dik Vendetta
September 9th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Fra. Bunnë at 103: An acre is something like 43500 sq. ft. So, if Lois were your realtor and she took you to see a house on an acre lote that was 10 feet wide (two of which were given up to a burbling oil seep), the lot would be about 4300 feet long. Your neighbors would need a spotting scope to watch you pee on that kind of lot!
infallible
September 9th, 2008 at 2:46 pm
So, Tales from the Bucket will contain 15 Gil Thorp stories? Considering the glacial nature of these stories, this will be a tome longer than the Bible and twice as boring.
But will it contain the thrilling tale of the gang of “educable mental retards?”
UncleJeff
September 9th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
Gil Thorp: Man, the old school Gil image brought back good recent memories of the insanity of Milford High.
Now, Gil looks like Joe Thug, stereotypical gangster from 1940s noir movies, and Marty (No Longer Evil Spock) Moon looks like just another cable sports show host…bringing you poorly edited and out-of-focus game films made by parents in the stands using a seven-year-old Panasonic camera.
Bootsy
September 9th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
MT: I think that deer needs a puppy, stat!
dale
September 9th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Seismic 2 – 109
You may be confusing a maintenance due light with an engine warning light. I’m quite sure my previous car had one of each.
Pickles
“wing nut” is not a new word. My big book of word meanings dates it from 1895-1900. What you have is a new definition. Worse, yours isn’t even accurate based on the usage I’ve seen.
Marked Trail
September 9th, 2008 at 3:09 pm
That just isn’t a deer, it is a yearling.
Oh Dear, deer.
**clackity latch**
dale
September 9th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
Mallard Fillmore
My HS chemistry teacher demonstrated quite the opposite about grading on a curve. (I’m thinking that this requires not all scores are the same or everyone would get a C, or an F in South Park.)
Take all the scores, one test/cumulative/whatever, and calculate the parameters for a normal curve. Assign some ranges for the various letter grades. Someone is going to end up in that little piece at the far left. His final comment was something like, “So you still really want me to grade strictly on a curve?”
Calico
September 9th, 2008 at 3:21 pm
#121 – Toombah hoo
Eeeyoo!
Thank you
lesles
September 9th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
MT: “is she going to be alright?”
i’m afraid not, honey. might’ve been, if you hadn’t gone scared off that racoon i was fix’n to have for lunch. but now … well, i reck’n it all tastes like meat in the dark.
Red Greenback
September 9th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
“Berrill-Creem, a little dab’ll do ya,
Berrill-Creem, you’ll look so debonair,
Berrill-Creem, the gals’ll all pursue ya,
They love to get their fingers in your hair”
AmazingThor
September 9th, 2008 at 3:28 pm
From Today’s Rex Morgan:
Old Sea Captain: “Hey, Doc…what are you doing on that scow?”
Rex: “She’s paying me $10,000 and I thought, heck, for that much money I can just close my eyes and…oh, you meant the BOAT!”
Seismic-2
September 9th, 2008 at 3:28 pm
Dave Barry must not read this blog, or he would have suggested by now that “Gil Thorp and the Educable Retards” would make a good name for a rock band.
AmazingThor
September 9th, 2008 at 3:30 pm
#127 Bootsy:
We’re moved beyond the point where puppies can cure it. Quick, summon Mark and let him punch this baby deer back to life!
bats :[
September 9th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
123. Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^) : oh, did you HAVE to go and say that? For fear of Flickr imploding, you’ll just have to click dat bats :[ to get to my blog…
Anonymous
September 9th, 2008 at 3:38 pm
Fra. Bunnë, Official Comic Execrator–
One acre is 43,560 square feet.
Baron Bizarre
September 9th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
135: Seismic-2 says: “Dave Barry must not read this blog, or he would have suggested by now that “Gil Thorp and the Educable Retards” would make a good name for a rock band.”
———————————————————
I must confess, I’ve been thinking the same thing.
AhClem
September 9th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
#121 commodorejohn -
Props for the “Ummagumma” reference, the second-best PF album of all time (after “Meddle”).
Ned Ryerson
September 9th, 2008 at 3:47 pm
I was thinking that “Ollie Tweaks and the Two-Timing Bilge Bums” would make a good name for a rock band.
Josh
September 9th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
#116 Global H — No, that’s the other Joshua Fruhlinger. He’s a third cousin or something, and he lives in New York City. Really! Just to confuse you further, I do have my own Apple blog on another site:
http://www.itworld.com/personal-tech/54803/funnest-awfully-strong-word-couple-ipods
This one was typed from the comfort of my home office, not San Francisco, sadly.
Josh
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
# 118 bats — I confess I’ve always thought male Scottish accents were sexy. Now I’ll have to revisit certain fantasies and redo them with Japanese accents, or maybe Russian. Arrrgh.
Renee J
September 9th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
MW: Is that conference next to an all you can eat buffet? Because he didn’t look that big at the pool. Thank God.
commodorejohn
September 9th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
#140 AhClem – I’m not sure I’d rank it that high, but it is definitely very underrated. On Meddle, though, I will absolutely agree; best Floyd album ever.
Ishmael
September 9th, 2008 at 4:02 pm
In honor of his 50th anniversary it appears that in today’s strip Gil Thorp is played by the late Michael Landon.
FOOBed again
September 9th, 2008 at 4:07 pm
The Chicago Tribune site has a Gil Thorp archive that goes back to 1997, plus they have the 1958 strips, or at least some of them.
http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/custom/gilthorp/cs-080908gilthorpgallery,0,4643155.cartoongallery
FOOBed again
September 9th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Also congrats to the COTW and all the runner-ups!
Dr. Weird
September 9th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
#128 – Dale
Herb and Jamaal want their big book of word definitions back when you’re done using it.
JH Pants
September 9th, 2008 at 4:23 pm
#55 Mr Coffee Nerves – I never realized what a revolting double entendre “shrimp scampi thongs” made until today. Something like that could only be inspired by Chinbeard and Mary Worth.
Red Greenback
September 9th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Did someone say shrimp thongs?
Seismic-2
September 9th, 2008 at 4:50 pm
#146 – I was thinking it was more along the lines of Kirk Douglas in “Spartacus”.
Not that I’m suggesting that Gil Thorp should be nailed to a cross, but…
lesles
September 9th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
#151 Red Greenback – NO! NOBODY SAID THAT! now, just keep your hands where we can see them and step away from the internet.
oh … ok, that’s not as horrifying as i thought it was going to be. alright, you’re free to go about your business, but just remember, you could get hurt pulling stunts like that – some people would ruth first and ask questions later.
Mr. O’Malley
September 9th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
On our current car, which requires the dashboard to be removed in order to put a new lightbulb in the clock, the Check Engine light means “dashboard has been removed”.
On our previous car, the Check Engine light meant “car has been driven at an altitude greater than 3000 feet during the past two weeks”. Which at least could have something to do with the engine.
Bob and Ray had a great sketch about the man with a 10,000 square foot house, but the lot is only 2 feet wide. I heard it on the radio just last Saturday.
Braniff
September 9th, 2008 at 6:02 pm
FOOB: Bad news if you read the Des Moines Register. They’re going to keep FOOB with all of its new-runs, re-runs or whatever. The editor of the section in which FOOB appears claims she received a five-to-one response from readers (central Iowans, I think) who prefer to keep things as they are.
Of course that was the day that rumor leaked out about Lance Armstrong’s comeback.
Could the end of the world as we know it be at hand? Let’s hope so–unless “the end” means more of the same old, same old, same old.
Joe Blevins
September 9th, 2008 at 6:16 pm
I love to think of Gil Thorp having a publicist. I picture sort of a Broadway Danny Rose type. Sure, he doesn’t represent the biggies — the Garfields, the Dilberts, etc. — but he gives his clients everything he’s got.
It is with incredible delight that I noticed that the GT empire is headquartered in Arlington Heights, IL — MY HOME TOWN! We use the same post office and everything! I’m sure there must be a way I can take advantage of this coincidence, but I can’t think of one…
Muffaroo-who-walks
September 9th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
Angry Kem @43 – The weird thing is, he bears some superficial resemblance to my linguistics teacher, 25 years ago in Georgia. Chinbeards, both of them.
Artist formerly known as Ben @57 – It’s the TV-movie remake of “Harvey” from the pooka’s point of view. Nobody believes that he sees Jimmy Stewart, but he’s drunk all the time anyway, so he doesn’t much care.
Poteet
September 9th, 2008 at 8:25 pm
# 155 Braniff — Thanks for the news. Can you tell me how/where/when you found out?
Howabominable (aka Lindsey ^_^)
September 9th, 2008 at 8:34 pm
137 bats :[ – It was actually a play on today’s comic for “Questionable Content” where they talked about porn stars holding kittens. However, your… masterpiece has shown that that kitten from PBS can make anything look a tiny bit cuter. If you just look at the kitten. And nothing else.
Toronto
September 9th, 2008 at 9:49 pm
Dingo @ 91: Did someone mention Janis Ian?
I learned the truth at Charterstone
That Mary rules us from her throne
Dispensing wisdom all around
To all us peons on the ground.
The conf’rences I never knew
The online purchases I made
Led to my ID’s bad misuse
In Montreal, a sad charade.
And those of us with room temp IQs
Lacking in most basic life clues
Desperately remain at home
While Chinbeard calls us on the phone
And tells us he’s feeling refreshed
While we still wear our purple dress
It isn’t all it seems, at Charterstone…
Global H
September 9th, 2008 at 10:24 pm
#140 AhClem –
Speaking of references, nice Firesign reference in your name. I think we’re ALL bozos on this blog.
Braniff
September 10th, 2008 at 9:50 am
#158–There was a small article in Monday’s DM Register about the situation with FOOB. Last week there was an article about the end and the new-runs in the paper which attracted only two online comments.
Laura Shapiro
September 10th, 2008 at 5:16 pm
Josh, I’m so glad I decided to stop by your blog today. Congratulations on the RiffTrax! That is SO COOL OMG — can I touch you??? ::pokepoke::
I’ve loved MST3K for, jeez, decades now, and my friends and I have been loving RiffTrax and Cinematic Titanic. Such a treat to get more riffing from these guys, and now with bonus Josh. Can’t wait to hear what you bring to the table on that one.
Shoot me an email sometime. I’d love to catch up.
Josh
September 12th, 2008 at 2:41 am
So, maybe I’m not the only one, but how exactly did this opportunity come up? Do they regularly read? Did someone point you out as a commenter? Were you in LA, minding your own business when men in jogging suits pushed you into an unmarked van, and you were whisked away to their secret headquarters for drinks and a studio recording?
Stifler's Dad
September 12th, 2008 at 10:15 am
I don’t know anything about American Football, but any sport with positions names like “Tight End” and “Tackle” just sounds hugely homoerotic, e.g. Gil has been working hard with Steve’s Tight End and Cully’s Tackle.