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Weekend comics wrap-up!

Gil Thorp, 11/1/08

Ha ha, at last the big fall Gil Thorp plot twist has been REVEALED, and it’s every bit as insane and asinine as “Elmer gets to stay in America as a bilingual publicist, even though that doesn’t match up with his visa and he doesn’t speak Spanish” and “Tyler bludgeoned himself.” You see, for the first time ever in Gil Thorp history, the fact that a panel was drawn with word balloons coming out of a random building was a deliberate attempt to create ambiguity, rather than a ploy to avoid drawing human hands and/or hairstyles. In fact, Matt the Hat’s ticker is perfectly healthy, whereas the ‘Czak truly does love gettin’ naked with other dudes more than life itself. And now that the doctor has arrived, we’re all going to learn a valuable lesson about why medical professionals should ideally write things down. As punishment, Matt will be forced to have Jeff’s heart attack for him.

In panel three, Matt reveals that after his time in this two-bit comic is over, he’ll be moving on to bigger and better things, portraying Will Eisner’s The Spirit.

Mary Worth, 11/1/08

I’m hoping we get beyond the dull “Frank is an overbearing stage parent” story here and go right on into “Frank is a paranoid schizophrenic.” “The judges are always watching! They have a network of spy satellites and bugs, and can see out of any sign painted red! They put tracking devices in fillings, which why we never go to the dentist! If I hadn’t covered the house with tinfoil, we’d never have a moment’s peace!”

And let’s get a quick precis of Sunday’s comics, via the opening throwaway panels!

Panels from Curtis, 11/2/08

Oh, Curtis, are you really stooping so low as to borrow narrative techniques from Herb and Jamaal? Still, I have to admit that we’re certainly being set up for excitement here. Something of value, you say? But what could it be? I am on tenterhooks!

(True fact: it turned out to be a toilet.)

Panels from Judge Parker, 11/2/08

“The angle at which the body crumpled, the blood splatter pattern, the powder burns — all aesthetic abominations! Usually murder scenes are things of beauty, or at least have something to keep you engaged. This … this was just a big disappointment.”

44 responses to “Weekend comics wrap-up!”

  1. Hank
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:36 pm [Reply]

    RE: Judge Parker. I would snark about the fact that the detective put on a low cut evening dress while planning on visting a crime scene. However, given the high heels and scoop tops that the producers of the various “CSI” programs dress Marg Helgenberger, et al, in that really wouldn’t be fair.

  2. Little Guy
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

    MW: Dangit, why aren’t we getting to the knee-whacking yet? WWWWHHHHHHHYYYYY?

    JP: If she borrowed Dolly’s Halloween outfit, that would be better fanservice than her opaque evening dress.

  3. Hank
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

    RE: Funky Winkerbean. Man, how creepy was today’s strip? As written and drawn, Les is apparently fantasizing that his daughter is his dead wife.

  4. Dingo
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:44 pm [Reply]

    What?!? No mention of the Roosevelt/Taft slashfic?

  5. Skullturf Q. Beavispants
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:46 pm [Reply]

    I guess Curtis lives on Vague Street.

  6. teenchy
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    Yesterthread when I was young:

    Gallowglass @ 432: I don’t think you’ll see much WH Harrison/Tyler slashfic, though with eight children by his first wife and seven by his second – plus possibly two others by his slaves – Tyler certainly kept busy. Whether he had time to play for the other team remains a mystery.

    I’d like to pose the question again from my late post:

    Was Peanuts the Funky Winkerbean of the 1960s? Discuss.

  7. True Fable
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:50 pm [Reply]

    Every ounce of snark I had is in yesterthread and I’m not going to rerun it here, but yes, I also wondered why Hot Detective and Sam are getting all dolled up just to go tromp around the scene of a suicide before they go out to eat. MMmmmm, rare sirloin!

  8. Rusty
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:51 pm [Reply]

    Curtis: A toilet is something of value if Gunther had never had one before. In fact, it’s kind of like the old “the one-eyed man is the king in a land of the blind” type things, if he has the only indoor plumbing on the block.

  9. Calico
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:53 pm [Reply]

    #6 – I don’t think so, but I do think that Gil Thorp is the new Funky Winkerbean, seeing that med records have been mishandled/misinterpreted/switched and all.

  10. One-eyed Wolfdog
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

    True Fable – the Sweet Briar Vixen is indeed red and white and WIN all over, and if they ever have a “hug the mascot” day… well! What I am trying to say is that I hope you will write to Sweet Briar to express your vigorous support of this event.

  11. Ace Diamond
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:56 pm [Reply]

    JP: They killed Hacksaw Jim Duggan?

    …ok I’m sure that joke was used already

  12. will
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:58 pm [Reply]

    Slylock Fox: I’m on Shady Shrew’s side. A supercooled liquid is liquid below its normal freezing temperature. The only flaw with his cup, and it is a big one, is that once you disturb a supercooled liquid it tends to freeze all at once.

  13. Old School Allie Cat
    November 3rd, 2008 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

    #435 Yesterthread – Portnoy’s Complaint, right?

    gilthorp – So, now that Matt’s heart is OK, can he get his girlfriend to take him back? That’s all I really care about.

    Mary Worth – Could they make Lynn look just a little more like Tonya Harding? I’d like to see Jeff Gillooly take a lead pipe to someone’s knee – my first choice would be Mary.

    FOOB – Oh, you’re scowling now Elly, but… well, no, you’re pretty much always scowling.

  14. Shermy Glamrocker
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:02 pm [Reply]

    The inability to access Berkeley Breathed’s Web site is really pissing me off.

  15. Wings
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

    Can anyone explain the joke in today’s Heathcliff, besides the writer getting me to think this long on it?

  16. Mary Kay Commando
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

    14 – me too! At least I could scare up the last “Opus,” tho a day late…it is sweet and appropriate. Does it also signal Breathed’s segue into full-time children’s book author? I hope so. “Pete & Pickles” came out a few weeks ago and is hopelessly adorable. Only story ever to feature a Manic Pixie Dream Elephant.

  17. Seismic-2
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

    Monday Funnies:

    9CL: “Hic”? My reaction to this dialog was, “Barf!”

    GA: Is the painting really worthless, or is a dishonest appraiser just leading Slim and Clovia astray so that he can reclaim a discarded masterpiece from the garbage? Well, considering that Rufus found it in the dump in the first place, I’m inclined to think that it’s now back where it belongs. But then I also thought that Sultan Pepper wouldn’t pay Rover a fortune for an invention that didn’t work, so what do I know about the intricate plotting of GA, anyway.

    GT: Matt the Hatt (and thanks to the excellent This Week in Miford blog for that spelling!) has finally doffed his chapeau, in advance mourning of the sudden demise of his best friend, whom he helped set up to die. Will that best friend’s girlfriend reach over and strangle him for that treachery, or will she break out laughing at Matt’s head?

    Fastrack: We already saw that happen herein, over the weekend.

  18. Paul1963
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:12 pm [Reply]

    Shermy Glamrocker @ 14: I agree. Bad enough he makes us go visit a website to see the final panel of his final strip (Ha-ha, Opus readers without Internet access! You lose!), but apparently the server for his own site can’t handle all the additional traffic coming from the other site.

    PBS: More like 110 pounds.

  19. Lithros
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:13 pm [Reply]

    Watching Mary’s shock and dismay at this strange shouting man preempting her chance to dispense sage advice is pretty satisfying.

    Mary’s meddling is inevitable, of course, but hopefully it can end in something really productive. Like, violence, Tonya Harding-style. That’d be good.

  20. Paul1963
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

    I guess I should mention that, once I went to the Humane Society website and saw the last panel of Opus, I did think it was very sweet, and a nice farewell to the character after nearly 30 years.

  21. Dingle Dongle
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    MW: I want to see a Mary Worth where she gets up and says “Solve your own problems – I’m old and on vacation.” The next panel can be of her drinking alone starting at a picture of Aldo.

  22. Batman Beatles
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    Cathy – Watch Cathy eat a whole pan of brownies and then blame it on the manufacturers who made the mixer.

  23. Windier E. Megatons
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    Is that the hint of a nipple in that first Judge Parker panel? If not, why not?

  24. Poteet
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    Why is my magic link to PRINCE VALIANT not working? *sob*

  25. Idols of Mud
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:26 pm [Reply]

    @Dingo (#4): I hope Josh rounds up the best of the Taft/Roosevelt slashfic for COTW, assuming the collection doesn’t make him vomit.

    Mary Worth: “That advice was WEAK, Mary! Why didn’t you appeal to my better nature? Don’t you see how much I’m living through my daughter? If you’re going to be a champion nagger, you’re going to have to ride my ass more!”

  26. The Divine O'F
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:27 pm [Reply]

    Yesterthread Former Ben:

    YESH! It was “Birdy!” I’m SO impressed, and you win the 30 points.

    For an extra five points, can SOMEONE please tell me how Opus died? Or why? I have not read that strip in a couple of years, and am curious. But not curious enough to look it up on the Chronicle.

  27. Cranky
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:28 pm [Reply]

    Non-snark props to Joe Giella for his rendering of Frank in today’s second panel. “We will place first, right Lynn? Right? Right? ‘Cause it’s for you, not me! Huh-huh.”

    It distracted me from the bizarre liquid Lynn is drinking which turns from white to orange in seconds.

  28. Niall
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:29 pm [Reply]

    Judge Parker has me seething. For once even I can see the utter ridiculousness of the difficulty of doing a suicide with a rifle. And.. “Doll yourself up, we’re going to a murder scene!” just made me groan.

    Then Garfield woke me up. With a start. And a cry of anguish.

    So I distracted myself with thoughts of my Wednesday date. ..which might become a Monday date. …aaand Tuesday date. And prolonged Wednesday date.

    (time to stock up on vitamins…)

    Oh yes, and bravo to Reynard Noir on doing what needed to be done with Sunday’s Slylock Fox of Horror. Mr. Bob Weber Jr, have you NO SHAME?

    Ed Power: wow, that was a very poignant My Cage today. Kinda funny, but not nice – but yeah, too many guys do that error. (I have before.) Well done.

  29. Niall
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

    4. Dingo: I’ve been away from the blog mostly because I’ve been busy, and now I’m afraid to check the last two threads. Really, really afraid.

  30. Robert
    November 3rd, 2008 at 1:32 pm [Reply]

    Curtis: He just came back to get another whiff of Gunther’s piss-stained urinal.

    Zits: Looks like they let the writer from “Shoe” do this one.

  31. McManx
    November 3rd, 2008 at 2:16 pm [Reply]

    #23 – Yep. It’s nippy in Judge Parker land.

  32. WillieO
    November 3rd, 2008 at 2:17 pm [Reply]

    “Duggan’s death wasn’t pretty. It’ll take them a week to scrub the ceilings in the bedroom, foyer and hallway..”

  33. Baka Gaijin
    November 3rd, 2008 at 2:54 pm [Reply]

    Judge Parker: Dixie must be a member of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants Halter Top.

  34. papa zita
    November 3rd, 2008 at 3:34 pm [Reply]

    Judge Parker: Isn’t that the same woman who was doing the David Caruso sunglasses thing the other week? Cops are supposed to laugh at CSI, not ape it. Oh, wait, Barreto probably thinks CSI is still cool.

  35. Mars
    November 3rd, 2008 at 4:17 pm [Reply]

    DANGIT JOSH, WHERE IS THE FINAL OPUS PANEL? SHOW SOME PROPER PROPS TO THE PASSING OF A LEGEND, YOU %^$^#%…..

  36. David S. Mihocik
    November 3rd, 2008 at 4:24 pm [Reply]

    I actually was kind of hoping for some Opus wrap-up here. I know the CC’s MO is to call bad shit out, but shouldn’t we occasionally honor the gems that we actually turn to the comic page to read un-ironically?

    I’ll openly admit the following as a 25 year old Republican leaning guy: when I saw the final Opus panel on Sunday morning, my eyes misted over and I hugged my Opus plush in a very manly way. There are very few real artists making quality comic strips, and we have lost the greatest for the third, and it seems, final time. Thank you Berkeley for all the years of joy, and the laughs, and now the tears you somehow managed to get out of me.

    Above all I will miss big Steve Dallas, in my opinion, the greatest comic strip character ever. In the end, it was Steve (with Opus obviously) who closed the curtain on the strange, lovely world of Bloom County-Outland-Opus. Not Bill the Cat, not Oliver, not Milo or Binkley. But my chain smoking friend Steve. You were truly a king amongst men.

    Goodnight.

  37. texas buddha
    November 3rd, 2008 at 5:52 pm [Reply]

    I sort of wished that Berkley had left off with Bloom County and never attempted a comeback. That would have been the way to go out in style… The way Watterson did it with Cavlin and Hobbes.

    But to be fair I didn’t see the Sunday funnies, so if it was good then who am I to snark?

  38. Muffaroo
    November 3rd, 2008 at 6:07 pm [Reply]

    teenchy @6 – The answer to your proposed question: No. Discussion: Peanuts was a strip about Everyman in the guise of a six-year-old. Funky Winkerbean was a wacky hi-school strip in the vein of Archie. There’s your comparison: Archie.

    Idols of Mud @25 – MW: Winner!

  39. miss mo
    November 3rd, 2008 at 6:33 pm [Reply]

    Curtis – For a second there I thought Josh was saying he was on a toilet instead of tenterhooks. Now I have to get that image out of my head. Thanks a lot, Toilet-using Josh.

  40. Canuckguy
    November 3rd, 2008 at 7:49 pm [Reply]

    I’m starting to think that the only reason Frank’s nagging advice is bad and Mary’s nagging advice is good is that the object of Frank’s nagging can often be seen wearing sequins. While it’d be so awesome to see Chinbeard, Dr. Jeff, and all of Charterstone (including Mary herself) in sequins, it would make Mary’s nagging advice “bad”, where the only reason people read the strip is for good advice from Mary, she’s Dear Abby for people who can’t read!

  41. KT
    November 3rd, 2008 at 8:57 pm [Reply]

    #12, will:

    Yes, superchilled water is fun! I once left a bottle of water in my car overnight in Kankakee, IL in November, and when I picked it up the next morning, it was still liquid, but underpressured. So I removed the cap to equalize the pressure, and the water froze into ice BEFORE MY EYES, from top to bottom, in about two seconds!

  42. MWDG-Mary Worth Discussion Group
    November 3rd, 2008 at 9:20 pm [Reply]

    my friend Nicole noticed in today’s strip (November 3rd …year of our lord 2008) that Mary has switched Lynn’s drink!

    in panel one Lynn is holding a glass of water (could be vodka) … in panel two she is holding a glass of Tang (on the rocks)

    If this is not Tang could it be some steroid laden sports beverage?

  43. Alan Vanneman
    November 3rd, 2008 at 11:56 pm [Reply]

    “Is that the hint of a nipple in that first Judge Parker panel?”

    Dude, Judge Parker set the world’s record for nipple silhouettes in a daily last month! Wake up!

  44. Anonymous
    November 4th, 2008 at 9:50 pm [Reply]

    (true fact : the toilet was one of a kind, and sculpted from elephant shit)

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