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Though in the case of his publisher Andy Clark, Harry genuinely does not give a crap

Herb and Jamaal, 7/19/13

Wow, I’ve been reading Herb and Jamaal for something like ten years now and I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen Herb make any comments about his wife’s inability to cook. But whatever, it’s an infinitely relatable joke (as are jokes about hot airline meals, which haven’t been served on domestic coach flights since 2005 or so) so why not just drop it in here? Haha, women, am I right? They can’t cook, even though they’re the ones who are supposed to cook! Herb and his live-in mother-in-law run a restaurant together and presumably have some degree of culinary skill, so it totally makes sense that Herb has been seething with resentment over the dinners his wife makes them for years now.

Family Circus, 7/19/13

I genuinely, non-ironically love the dubious way Jeffy is regarding the business end of that golf club. He knows that thing’s coming for him, coming for his big, tempting, oversized target of a head. He doesn’t know if it’ll happen now or a week from now, doesn’t know if it’ll be on purpose or just because Billy likes swinging things around and doesn’t really care who or what he hits, but he knows trouble’s brewing.

Funky Winkerbean, 7/19/13

“You can let even one of your dearest friends believe that you’ve ever spent a single solitary second caring about whether he lives or dies! He’ll think you’re ‘funny.’”

243 responses to “Though in the case of his publisher Andy Clark, Harry genuinely does not give a crap”

  1. Mr. Yezpitelok
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:30 am [Reply]

    Mary Worth: Don’t look too closely at that faux cactus, Mary. Or you’re liable
    to end up in a papier-mache and cardboard resort “jail” — with bars made out
    of ginormous toilet paper tubes*.

    *Used by Pluggers, of course!

  2. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:32 am [Reply]

    A&J: *SNURK!* smart phone weather aps have been popular around me recently, so this one really hit the funnybone home.

    PBS: The Didactic Duo no doubt concurs.

    NAoQV: o SURE! blame the weasel. Just like the Fox, keeping the mustelids down.

    Zits: lol. nice cross-strip meta.

    Bizarro: old trope is ollllld.

    JP: to go with her current matched set of Barretos!!

    MUTTS: CALLED IT!!!!!

  3. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:32 am [Reply]

    Love Is . . .contagious.

  4. Gasoline Alley Oop
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:33 am [Reply]

    @Mr. Yezpitelok (#1):

    I thought Pluggers used old “Deers & Doebuck” catalogues to wipe their asses.

  5. seismic-2
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:35 am [Reply]

    I don’t normally repeat myself from the previous post, but redundancy seems to be the order of the day in this strip, so:

    FW1: “Do you think we should call your publisher Andy Clark to see if his flight home was OK?”
    “No, my wife Harriet Dinkle… Guys don’t do that.”

    FW2: “Do you think we should call your publisher Andy Clark to see if his flight home was OK?”
    “Why would calling my publisher ‘Andy Clark’ see that his flight home was OK? And don’t call him ‘Shirley’, either.”

  6. KreatureFeatures
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:38 am [Reply]

    FW: If you think your publisher Andy Clark will put out, you should definitely call him.

  7. revenge4Aldo
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:40 am [Reply]

    FC: Jeffy is thinking they may have finally found something that will free them from Dolly’s tyranny.

  8. CanuckDownSouth
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:41 am [Reply]

    Luann: Did Evans jump straight from school into syndication? This strip has a vibe of “anything less than the pinnacle of Serious Achievement in a field isn’t worth it”. Tiffany has done things like the Zeye publicity, interning, and now having a headshot used in picture frames (regardless of the absurdity of how she got the gig). But she’s not to be taken seriously. Panel 3 seems to be setting her up in a “hah-ha! she actually thinks having her photo used is an achievement – how silly of her!” moment.

    Quill meanwhile should keep at acting, presumably to do more plays. And Luann only ignores the siren call of Julliard because of money issues, not because one school play doesn’t make her competitive for the program. I get the feeling that we’re supposed to root for them because they don’t bother with the small stuff, and Tiffany is supposed to be silly for doing so.

  9. Chareth Cutestory
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:42 am [Reply]

    Funky Winkerbean: No no NO, make it stop, make it stop!! She’s starting to draw the curtains, he’s starting to take off clothing, and the lights have gone down in panel three! Wednesday’s “punchline” was a actually a terrifying prediction!

  10. Tom T.
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:42 am [Reply]

    Sally Forth: Getting pregnant turns Jackie into her sister.

  11. Shran
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:43 am [Reply]

    FC: It looks like Billy has secretly been reading his ancient Greek myths again. Now he’s fascinated with the Sword of Damocles, is he? You better hope Ma never finds out you’ve been reading that pagan filth or the hurt Big Daddy Keane will put on you will make the Sword seem like child’s play.

  12. pugfuggly
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:43 am [Reply]

    H&J The look on Jamaal’s face is great. “Hey, I try my best to….oh, your wife wife. Yeah, she’s the worst.”

    FC “…or five, or ten…whatever you got in your pocket, capisce?

    FW I’m not sure when this strip became about Donald Rumsfeld’s secret life with Dick Cheney, but I like it!

  13. Liam
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:43 am [Reply]

    Spiderman-”IT’S A TRAP,” Admiral Ackbar

    A3G-Cole would like it if you sat on his face.

    FC-Jeffy knows what’s going to happen. Billy’s going to try and cave his head in with the golf club.

    FC 2-Must be taking lessons from Gil Thorp.

    JP-”And you shall give them to me. I wanted a little brother to boss around but my parents kept giving me sisters who would tragically die.”

    Love Is-No ‘Sorry About the STD I Gave You’ card?

    MT-Meanwhile the killer rabbit is planning on taking out Rusty and Jason Smith.

    MT 2-”Oh no! He’s seen me. Now I got to get out of here,” the rabbit thinks to itself.

    MW-”Let us enjoy the beauty this place has to offer.” Sounds like something you say to a person before you take them out to the middle of nowhere and kill them.

    RMMD-”And tell Heather that the mysterious calls are coming from inside the house.”

  14. C. Sandy Cyst
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:43 am [Reply]

    Can you blame anyone in the Funkyverse for not giving a shit about each other? It’s a defence mechanism they’ve evolved naturally. They’re in enough pain as it is just from existing.

  15. Liam
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:46 am [Reply]

    FW-Sadly Andy Clark had a terrible flight. Some old man opened an emergency exit in midair, the old woman sitting next to him kept trying to meddle in his life, and a guy in a Spiderman costume beat up this little kid.

  16. Little Blue Bicycle
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:46 am [Reply]

    @seismic-2 (#5): “Do you think we should call your publisher Andy Clark to see if his flight home was OK?
    “My publisher is named Cliff Finch, dear.”
    “No, I meant calling him on a cell phone using the current New Zealand slang term “Andy Clark” which means calling on a cell phone.”
    “No, Cliff will think I’m a wuss.”

  17. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:47 am [Reply]

    JP – Yes, the world really needs two more lunkheaded sons of privilege crashing around in it.

    Is Randy supposed to come across as a dimwitted frat boy, sans the whimsy? Or is he just drawn that way?

    PIBG – My first reaction was “Awesome, now can this story be over now?” My second was “Wait, that means we have to start another one.”

    Luann – Suddenly Quill has a real gift for acting. We’ve never really seen this before, he mostly sticks to “I’m a Snot” and other musical endeavors. I know he was in a school play about 5-6 years ago in real time, but we never see him rehearsing, talking about his love of acting, auditioning for roles. Of course the character is just a cardboard cutout for Luann to prop up in her window in order to get back at Tiffany, so I’m not surprised. His acting ability is right up there with Luann’s Inner Beauty, and Gunther’s Nice Guy and B-Wad’s sex life as informed attributes that somehow never translate to actual plot lines. Thank goodness.

  18. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:51 am [Reply]

    and now, a word from Dog.

    yeah, Labs all think that they are lap dogs.

    corgis got style.

    puppy eyes. resistance just mushed.

    for bb,u.

    tired of all the squee being dogs and cats? Well then, have a ikkle coati.

  19. Peanut Gallery
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:52 am [Reply]

    “ELP!”? Herb must be eating the Brain Salad.

  20. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:52 am [Reply]

    9CL – Not just porn, but 1990s Spice Channel heavily edited for viewing in your hotel room style porn. Poorly conceived setups, stilted and unnatural dialogue, oversexed characters whose reactions are completely inappropriate to the situation (“Your fiancee is still in a coma? Then he won’t mind when we get it aaaaaaaawn on his hospital bed. Oh yeah!”), then suddenly we cut away to closeups of hands intertwining, slow pans across the floor of the jail cell, and then a break to the next scene.

  21. Buck Ripsnort
    July 19th, 2013 at 7:58 am [Reply]

    FW: What’s the over/under on Publisher Andy Clark’s plane crashing, killing all aboard?

  22. jim, some guy in iowa
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:00 am [Reply]

    Heathcliff does the cannonball

    Rex, MD: first panel can be re used for the “Rex & June become temporarily estranged” storyline

    JP/MT: I can never decide which of these two is dimmer: Randy or Rusty. At least Rusty has the defense of being a kid growing up in the middle of fk-all-nowhere

  23. Braniff
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:02 am [Reply]

    @Peanut Gallery (#19): Or going to western Texas (as in El Paso International Airport, whose code is ELP).

  24. pugfuggly
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:03 am [Reply]

    A3G He may be out of practice with conversation, but he’s real rusty with flirting. Just spay her a compliment, Cole, don’t contort your face like that…

    Archie Wow, if you ever needed confirmation that this strip was in reruns, look no further than ‘Look at all the Help Wanted posters everywhere!’. I wonder if tomorrow we’ll be treated to a gag about Betty’s folks getting a sub-prime mortgage loan…

    JP “Two kids….boys…matching….ok, I’ll send off an e-mail to my child-broker in the morning. We’ve been good customers in the past, so I imagine it will be gratis.”

    MW “…but before we do, let’s wait for the peyote to kick in…..there we go….hey look, that waiter is a condor…”

    RMMD “Heather, is he still vomiting? No? Then I’ve lost interest…”

  25. jim, some guy in iowa
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:06 am [Reply]

    9CL/FW: Batiuk and McE seem to have a private competition going to see who can be more jerk-y and who can be more inappropriately ‘sexy’ on any given day. If only they’d try to be *funnier* than each other (dog knows, it wouldn’t be *difficult*)

  26. pugfuggly
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:08 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#24):

    ‘spay her a compliment’?

    goddangit…..

  27. Here come the Judge
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:08 am [Reply]

    I have decided, in the style of Funky Winkerbean, to start using the names of everyone I know as much as possible, whether it is appropriate or not. I’ll let you all know how it goes!

  28. Calvin's Cardboard Box
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:08 am [Reply]

    @Buck Ripsnort (#21): FW – What’s the over/under on Publisher Andy Clark’s plane crashing, killing all aboard?

    Well, Dead Saint Fucking Lisa Lisa Lisa did her best to avert the catastrophy. Unfortunately, due to an ectoplasmic emergency, she failed to confirm the flight number and ended up saving the life of Dinkle’s lover, Barry Wood, instead.

  29. Sam C
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:11 am [Reply]

    Epic foreshadowing in Funky. When news comes through of publisher Andy Clark’s fatal plane crash, it will trigger an inexorable descent into self-recrimination, madness and an unshakeable conviction that Harriet is an evil witch who can make THINGS happen just by talking about them…

  30. Voshkod
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:14 am [Reply]

    Herb and Jamaal have become unstuck in time; they’re on a trijet (most of which went out of passenger service years ago) and it serves hot food in coach. Well, with any luck, they’ve stumbled onto the set of Airplane!

    “I speak jive!”

    “Well, good, because these two sure as hell don’t.”

  31. survivor
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:14 am [Reply]

    No … Guys don’t do that. Guys fuck.

    The guests are gone. The party’s over. Time to fuck. You do put out, don’t you? I could go for a little butt action right now.

  32. My transmogrifier, Cardboard Box
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:14 am [Reply]

    Rex – All those millions, but his decision to not purchase a doorbell ended up killing him.

    Why this elaborate setup to get Rex and June involved? They call 911 for her, stay on the line with the paramedics so they can alert her when they are at the front door, and ask about the vomiting. We could have saved this whole week of strips by having Trophy Wife call from the hospital and tell them Avery was admitted after suffering a heart attack. That would free up more time for the Widdle Sawah and her Ennwui storyline that has been so pwomising.

  33. Doctor Handsome
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:15 am [Reply]

    Is Herb actually saying, “ELP!” or is that just the sound his haircut makes when it ejaculates?

  34. Écureuil Écumant
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:16 am [Reply]

    H&J The lower loop of the “B” in “BRICK-LIKE MASHED POTATOES” is mighty diminutive, leading me to ponder how mashed potatoes could be described as “PRICK-LIKE” — though the converse isn’t, alas, as implausible.

    Then Jamaal appeared in panel 4 and I understood how the letterer might have fallen victim to this subconscious slip.

  35. Peanut Gallery
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:19 am [Reply]

    “I’ll bet Lisa’s son Darrin’s wife Jessica’s father John Darling would have called your publisher Andy Clark. If he hadn’t been murdered.”

  36. My transmogrifier, Cardboard Box
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:20 am [Reply]

    I think a line of buttons reading “Ask me about the vomiting” could sell almost as well as the previous “Ask me about my pie” and “Ask me about our rainbow swirl” line. The last of which was apparently very popular in Nevada brothels for a while, until news broke that the cherry flavor in the swirl was underage.

  37. teenchy
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:23 am [Reply]

    H&J: (as are jokes about hot airline meals, which haven’t been served on domestic coach flights since 2005 or so)

    H&J appear to be flying in a Western Airlines DC-10, none of which have appeared in that livery since the mid-1980s when Delta acquired Western and got rid of the DC-10s.

  38. Doctor Handsome
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:23 am [Reply]

    I assume today’s Family Circus is the “clean” version for the newspapers, but substituting “FORE!” for “FUCK!” kind of changes the joke.

  39. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:25 am [Reply]

    “Mutts” second panel is calling for a ‘FRONNK!’

  40. Écureuil Écumant
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    FC: Jeffy’s pose is, indeed, so bathetic: hands casually shoved into pockets, chin lifted bravely aloft, whistling past the … er … graveyard.

  41. S. Stout
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    Luann: What the flippin’ fuck?!? Tiffany is the only character in this stupid comic that actually works at her craft, and yet Quill is the one with the future? Tiffany, who is going to be a picture model (which is actually incredibly impressive, and if it was Luann who was the picture model everyone in the strip would be applauding her for weeks)…yes, Tiffany is labeled by the drama club director that posing is all she’s good at, not acting. Is this the worst drama club ever? Why the hell is she in the lead female role if she’s not good at acting? Why the hell is an Australian, with likely a strong accent, who doesn’t really care about acting is cast as George Washington and praised for the acting skills he’s never displayed?

    Evans, you are a hack.

  42. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:28 am [Reply]

    Well, Josh, FW has given you the name of a potential publisher. I mean, if they’ll publish Dinkle’s crap…

  43. Écureuil Écumant
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#42): Or perhaps a certain museum gift shop. But can you draw?

  44. Dood
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:30 am [Reply]

    Judge Parker: I guess what they say is true. This strip’s lucky number’s two.

  45. Chareth Cutestory
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:31 am [Reply]

    @Liam (#15): Don’t forget the guy complaining about the airplane food while still eating it, making disgusting “ELP!” gagging noises with each bite

  46. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:35 am [Reply]

    JP: Judging from panel 2, it looks as though April already has a matched set of Parkers.

    MT: “Oh, fuck, here comes that handsy, weird-looking kid. As if my day weren’t bad enough already.”

  47. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:37 am [Reply]

  48. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:40 am [Reply]

  49. pugfuggly
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:40 am [Reply]

    @Voshkod (#30):

    Well, with any luck, they’ve stumbled onto the set of Airplane!

    “So you two are just ‘good friends’? Surely you can’t be serious….”

  50. Dood
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:44 am [Reply]

    Family Circus: “You know, he could’ve gone with the hybrid, Jim, but, well, my word, just look at the size of Jeffy’s head!”

  51. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:45 am [Reply]

    @Écureuil Écumant (#43): Can I draw! What a question! Can Bolle draw? Can Giella draw? Is the Pope Presbyterian?

  52. Nehemiah Scudder
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:46 am [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#y239): No, really. There was a sea-change. Look at google newspapers in 1939, and then in 1949.

  53. Anonymous
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:48 am [Reply]

    Thanks to fashion forward Gil Thorpe last week and Randy Parker today, I now know that men’s shorts are finally rising above the knee again. I think it’s important to stay abreast of the cultural norms for men, otherwise I’d do something embarrassing like calling my publisher to see if his flight home was okay.

  54. Voshkod
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:49 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#49): “We are, and don’t call me ‘Shirley.’”

  55. mary_worthless
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:53 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#26): I, personally, was just going to let that one go……

  56. TheDiva
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:01 am [Reply]

    FW: “No wait, ‘guys’ isn’t the word I’m looking for, what was it…oh yeah, ‘assholes’.”

    H&J: I’ll bet his wife’s a lousy driver, too.

  57. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:04 am [Reply]

    9 Chickweed Lane: I don’t know what’s more neurotic – no, fuck it. I don’t have the energy for this today. McEldowney wins by attrition today.

    Crock: Time to drag out the old formula again: thing+other thing=joke, putatively.

    Dick Tracy: As much as I love the Great State of Wisconsin (which will not apologize for its cheese), I have to call shenanigans here. Nobody’s that hip in Milwaukee, and the only evil plots they come up with in Madison[*] involve vegan eco-feminist shakras. I suppose you’d find the right balance of funk and evil in Racine or Kenosha, but all they’re interested in down that way is kringle and…well, come to think of it, what the hell do they care about in Kenosha? Jockey underwear, I suppose.

    Herman: I said, Roadrunner once, roadrunner twice: he goes faster thousand miles an hour…

    Mark Trail: I wish I couldn’t read that first panel as an otter search in Rusty’s pants while being stalked by a giant rabbit, I wish so hard. But – sigh – giant rabbits are so disturbing, how can you get them out of your mind?

    Mary Worth: If the “beauty of this place” is anything like Beth, Dawn, or whatever-interchangeable-woman Mary’s seized upon here, then I expect they’ll be gazing on that inflatable cactus for a good long while.

    Nancy: This joke is so old it’s not even really a joke anymore, and it’s far sexier than…no. I said I was done, and I meant it.

  58. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:06 am [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#47): ayup! saw the American BD tag, and that confirmed that I had to link it for you. :-)

  59. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:07 am [Reply]

    @My transmogrifier, Cardboard Box (#36): I’d heard good things about the “strawberry rhubarb” option as well.

  60. Mr. Yezpitelok
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#24):

    MW “…but before we do, let’s wait for the peyote to kick in…..there we go….hey look, that waiter is a condor…”

    ¡PLOP!

  61. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:10 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#24): Personally, I’d spend good money for Fear and Loathing in Tucson, as illustrated by Ralph Steadmann.

  62. Lily Sincere
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:11 am [Reply]

    Bah, when Billy whacks Jeffy’s head off with the golf club, he’s totally going to slice. On the plus side, he seems to be using a seven iron, so Jeffy’s head may get some loft to it. According to decapitation lore, he’ll get a great view of whatever hellish Levittown they live in just before he goes to that Great Suburb in the sky.

    Now if it were Dolly, she’d hit Jeffy’s head straight down the middle, 220 yards minimum, because she’d put some forethought into it instead of blindly flailing away.

  63. lynn
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:11 am [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#57): Kenosha! Birthplace of Orson Welles and…Charles Siebert!

  64. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:14 am [Reply]

    @Mr. Yezpitelok (#60): That would make an excellent crossover plot line for Duke from ‘Doonesbury’.

  65. Illustrator Steve
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:14 am [Reply]

    MT – “Is that you, little buddy?”

    “Sure, skipper, it’s me, your old pal, Gilligan!”

  66. Horace Broon
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:16 am [Reply]

    ASM: MJ really isn’t a good actress, is she?

    A3G: “I just talk to the white coats. I think that’s one of the things that’s got the doctors wearing the white coats worried.”

    Retail: How exactly does Josh (not our Josh, Retail‘s Josh) expect this to go? “Oh, no, the job I’ve been complaining about for years, but never actually quit, could have given me my promotion earlier but didn’t! I must now resign in protest at this betrayal from a company I never expected anything better of!”

    RMMD: “No paramedics, June!! They follow their rules, not ours!”

  67. Bunivasal
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:17 am [Reply]

    Today’s FC paints a picture. I imagine Big Daddy Keane smacking a ball 200 yards, then leaning off to the side cAsually. Angry yells come from down the green, where the ball has bounced off some poor shmucks skull. “Fore.” Yawns Keane, lining up another shot.

  68. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:18 am [Reply]

    MW: Now Mary and friend will saddle up the Horse with No Name.
    //to quote Dave Barry, “Just name the frickin’ horse, already.”

  69. Odie Odo
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:18 am [Reply]

    JP: April surreptitiously suggests a three-way with Randy and his father.

  70. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:19 am [Reply]

    @Horace Broon (#66): “MJ really isn’t a good actress, is she?” – well, she’s at least as good as Quill.

  71. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:22 am [Reply]

    Speaking of Mary Worth, which I usually don’t: is it my imagination, or does the framing of the panels show…the top of the backdrop, and the stage lighting above it???
    //Is this where they filmed the moon landing?

  72. Shr Ug
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:28 am [Reply]

    PBS: Well, yeah, I agree. On the other hand, lemmings don’t speak (let alone speak English, and argue about spelling); don’t actually commit suicide (let alone take turns at it); and are not able to hover in mid-air long enough to continue a discussion.

    Just ask anybody, alright?

  73. deelightful
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    @Chareth Cutestory (#9): Right?! I’m really uneasy about the voyeuristic quality of the first panel.

  74. Illustrator Steve
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:30 am [Reply]

    M – The giant hare is late…he’s late for a very important date … which makes perfect sense since this curent storyline obviously takes place somewhere behind the looking glass.

  75. Illustrator Steve
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:33 am [Reply]

    MT – Next week we will be introduced to big Mike’s head poacher…Willy Trapum.

  76. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:34 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#39): Per your request…Now, “knocking some Spidey sense into him” is a different matter altogether…

  77. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    @lynn (#63): How is that restraining order going, anyway? Alas

  78. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:36 am [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#76): I love it! Thank you!

  79. Chareth Cutestory
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:37 am [Reply]

    @deelightful (#73): Barf, you’re saying she isn’t drawing the curtains but opening them up? I do NOT want you to be right about that but I’m afraid you are CERTAINLY right.

  80. Droopy Says
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:41 am [Reply]

    @S. Stout (#41): Why the hell is an Australian, with likely a strong accent, who doesn’t really care about acting is cast as George Washington and praised for the acting skills he’s never displayed?

    Mel Gibson, The Patriot, better known as “Australia’s thoroughly-justified revenge for Quigley Down Under.

  81. Illustrator Steve
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:41 am [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#74): Sorry, comment #74 was supposed to be titled as MT, not M.

  82. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:42 am [Reply]

    @Chareth Cutestory (#79): If this is true, then Harriet was thinking about Andy Clark while…

  83. Mincy Pieface
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:44 am [Reply]

    Harry, Queen of De Nile: Sour grapes, Dinkle. Because “If You Didn’t Care for Me, If I Didn’t Care for You”…

    http://images.tcj.com/2011/09/3-Smith-Ballew.jpg

  84. Mincy Pieface
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:50 am [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#74): M — The giant hare is late…he’s late for a very important date … which makes perfect sense since this cur[r]ent storyline obviously takes place somewhere behind the looking glass.

    At what point does Peter Lorre come in?

  85. Brad
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:52 am [Reply]

    I suppose the beauty of the anachronistic and supremely generalized way Herb and Jamaal is typically written is that it could slip into reruns from the 1970s without anyone noticing.

  86. TheDiva
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:54 am [Reply]

    9CL: Sorry, I only got as far as “constabulary” before my improbable dialogue meter broke and I gave up.

    C’shaft: Oh, like your mangled metaphors are any more sophisticated….

    Luann: Ten years later…
    “Welcome back to Inside the Actors’ Studio, where we’re talking with Tiffany Farrell. As always, we have students from the Actors Studio Drama School at Pace University, and they have some questions for our guest. Go ahead.”
    “Hi, Tiffany! I have an opportunity to do some modeling work, but my parents say it will ruin my chances of being taken seriously as an actress. Do you have any advice?”
    “That’s a good question. You know, a lot of people look down on modeling as superficial, but you can get a lot from it: poise, the best way to present yourself as a person, some good shots for your portfolio, things like that. And you never know where it might lead–I met my first agent at a job modeling for picture frames. You know, those silly pictures that they put in the frame when they sell them–that was me. *laughs* And you know, if you decide to stay with modeling, there’s no shame in it–you can make a good career out of that. So I say go for it–you can’t underestimate real-world experience. It’s not nude shots, is it?
    “*laughs* No, no, nothing like that!”
    “Well, thank goodness for that. Next question.”
    “Don’t listen to her! Tiffany is an evil, evil tramp and she just wants attention!”
    “Oh my God, Quill?”
    “What the–you’re not a student! How did you get in here!”
    “It’s okay, I’ve got this. Hi, Quill. How’s the assistant manager position at Weenie World working out?”
    “It’s just temporary! I’m waiting for the right opportunity to showcase my rare acting talent!”
    “Uh-huh. You know what your problem is, Quill? You’re too proud. You think that anything less than a starring role on Broadway is an indignity. Look around you–you’re surrounded by students who know how hard it is out there, how few paying jobs there are in this business. They’re willing to start at the bottom and work their way up, instead of sneering at good paying work the way you do.”
    “Oh, what do you know! You were only an extra in your first movie and it bombed!”
    “Uh-huh, and my last movie made eighty million its opening weekend, so I think I’ve learned a few things since then. Shame you didn’t. Now, these nice security men will escort you out. Say hi to Luann for me.”

    MT: “Shit, he spotted me! I told the rabbit to warn me if he got near here!”

    MW: “It’s one hundred and five in the shade, let’s go for a walk! Once the delirium from dehydration sets in, you won’t feel so bad about your husband!”

    Phantom: *SPLAT!* “Or maybe not…”

    Pibgorn: Insult to Injury should be the name of this strip.

    SM: “And yet, knowing this, I went ahead and gave away vital information anyway. Oh well. I’ll just watch television; that seems to work for Peter…”

  87. Braniff
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:55 am [Reply]

    @Voshkod (#54): “I was Shirley in a past life. Now I’m a pop-up toaster” (A memorable reference to an old Kudzu comic strip.)

  88. bats :[
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:56 am [Reply]

    @Mr. Yezpitelok (#1): oh, NOW you’ve ruined the surprise! This happens every year before Tucson’s big rodeo…the Sheriff’s department pulls over some unsuspecting RV (out-of-star) on I-10, “arrests” the geezers inside, puts them in a jail like the one you’ve described, and then hosts them with hotel and tickets to the rodeo.
    Pretty sweet, actually…looks like Mary is going to join the Parkers, Spencers and Morgans as ‘gimme something because I’m a Parker/Spencer/Morgan!’ Dammit, she deserves it!

  89. Illustrator Steve
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:56 am [Reply]

    MT – “LOOK! … It’s an OTTER!”

    “WOW! That is simply AMAZING! Hey, kid … did it ever occur to you THAT may be the reason they named this place OTTER CREEK?”

  90. Herr Komerad Kommissar Denny
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:58 am [Reply]

    So just where is the person whose name is a category of plants being conveyed by flying machine with his friend whose head is shaped like a butternut squash together without the former’s spouse or spouse’s female parent with whom male spouses stereotypically have conflict going?

  91. pugfuggly
    July 19th, 2013 at 9:59 am [Reply]

    @Voshkod (#54):

    Voshkod, have you ever been to a Turkish prison?

    @mary_worthless (#55):

    Well, I wouldn’t want people thinking that Cole was castrating cats just out of view.

    @Mr. Yezpitelok (#60):

    iPLOP

    I had to look that one up….so, uh, thank you?

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#61):

    Mary Worth crossed with Fear and Loathing?…I’m initiating a kickstarter campaign….

  92. Esther Blodgett
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:03 am [Reply]

    @Liam (#15): re: Funky. I would pay SO MANY Internet dollars to see that mashup.

  93. Mibbitmaker
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:04 am [Reply]

    H&J: Women, amirite?

    FW: Guys, amirite?

    FC: Newspaper comics creators and golf, ami…… *sigh* Yes… I’m rite on that one.

  94. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    @S. Stout (#41): “the only character in this stupid comic that actually works at her craft”

    I think you’ve hit upon a theme. It really seems to me that the Evanses attribute no particular value to perseverance and hard work. At least, that’s the message I take from the strip. We’re constantly called-on to applaud people for who they are, not what they do.

  95. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:05 am [Reply]

    JP: “And if I get pregnant with girls, I know a couple Saudi sheiks who’ll take them off our hands.”

  96. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:07 am [Reply]

    @Esther Blodgett (#92): Are internet dollars like Bitcoins?

  97. Droopy Says
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:07 am [Reply]

    @TheDiva (#86): That would so get me to read Luann again . . .

  98. Raghead the Fiendly Neighbourhood Terrorist
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    Just got back from a funeral (no, you lot, nobody blew away the corpse, it became a corpse from acute pulmonary œdema)…what was I saying? Yeah, Tiff is *such* a loser for getting her face on picture frames across the length and breadth of the nation. That’s so lame compared to, say, losing your temper on stage and starting a fight with your co-star. Oh yeah!

    Meanwhile, wasn’t the troll in Plibgroin supposed to have been a reject from hell? So why should death matter to him? Brooke, you beefwit, is continuity such a chore?

    Also meanwhile: I’m amazed Herb didn’t say “food on that means of transport everyone’s using these days”. Next we know he’s going to mention something by name. O tempora, o mores.

  99. Ned Ryerson
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:08 am [Reply]

    FW: Harry Dinkle looks like Noam Chomsky.

  100. Odie Odo
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:08 am [Reply]

  101. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:10 am [Reply]

    @Raghead the Fiendly Neighbourhood Terrorist (#98): “O tempora, o mores.”
    //in the Pashtun tongue.

  102. Illustrator Steve
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:11 am [Reply]

    @Mincy Pieface (#84): RE: MT/behind the looking glass… “At what point does PETER LORRE come in?”

    // I don’t know … but if they actually have Peter Lorre cast as Alice I can definity see him reciting the line, “Have I gone MAD?!” Folllowed by his eyes buldging out and him taking a few of those deep nervous sighs he was famous for.

  103. Esther Blodgett
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:13 am [Reply]

    H&J: Wow, Jamaal’s expression is straight out of “Airplane!” “…Herb never criticizes my cooking.”

    FC: Actually, when golfers lean to the side and yell “Fore!” they’re just covering up a huge fart. Works every time.

    FW: The expression on Harry’s face just screams “You got your damn party, woman, now leave me alone,” doesn’t it? Alternate snark: The expression on Harry’s face just screams “Crap, she knows about me and my publisher Andy Clark. Play it cool, Dinkle. Play. It. Cool.”

  104. queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:13 am [Reply]

    @Odie Odo (#100): o, so that’s an upside down “!” and not an “i”.

    I si.

  105. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:14 am [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#Y281): Thank you! That’s quite wonderful.

  106. Raghead the Fiendly Neighbourhood Terrorist
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:16 am [Reply]

    101. Lumaca Morente

    Timeo Lumaca et dona ferentes.

  107. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:17 am [Reply]

    FW — Fifty years married to that guy. Fifty years. Does she drink?

  108. Esther Blodgett
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:18 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#96): No. They’re actually worth something. Bad-dum-CHING!

  109. Little Guy
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:19 am [Reply]

    @CanuckDownSouth (#8): This strip has a vibe of “anything less than the pinnacle of Serious Achievement in a field isn’t worth it”.

    This where the titular character was a YouTube sensation. Twice.

  110. Jim in Wisc.
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:20 am [Reply]

    Blandie: Considering the last Civil War vets passed away in the 1950s, it’s not surprising that this archaic comic strip uses a Civil War reference for it’s gag.

    Hagar, the Mildly Annoying: Ha ha ha. It’s funny because they despise each other.

    Melonhead Circus: Better Caption – “Now stand still while I knock your head off your shoulders.”

    Sexy Rexy: [Bones_McCoy] “He’s dead, Jim!” [/Bones_McCoy]

    Meddlin’ Mary: “Let us take a walk in the desert and die of heat stroke since it’s 110 degrees in Arizona today.”

    Marcus Autrailius: “C’mon Rusty, let’s go in the bushes so I can show you my slippery eel.”

  111. My transmogrifier, Cardboard Box
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:21 am [Reply]

    @Illustrator Steve (#89): MT – “WOW! That is simply AMAZING! Hey, kid … did it ever occur to you THAT may be the reason they named this place OTTER CREEK?”

    Does anyone remember when the guys built the dam at Otter Creek and the water backed up, backed up, backed up? Deep enough to dive, deep enough to dive.

  112. Casey, Crime Photographer
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:22 am [Reply]

    Spider-Man: After the “Tarantula” storyline runs its course, Peter teams up with 117-year-old Señor Wences to break Condorito out of a South American prison:

    http://fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2013/130/c/e/condorito_vs_real_life_by_genzoman-d64s8j7.jpg

  113. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:23 am [Reply]

    H & J — Per Josh’s comment, I’m amazed to learn that there are still some domestic flights where something is served besides small packets of pretzels.

  114. Chorus of Beavers
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:23 am [Reply]

  115. bats :[
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:24 am [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#57): re 9CL: are those Fleurrie’s LIPS on the other side of the bars? Then, ewww…

  116. Prince Vultan
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:25 am [Reply]

  117. J. Elhew Bisbee, Hobo Detective
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:25 am [Reply]

    Funky Winkerbean: “Don’t you think I should awkwardly refer to people whom we both know well as their occupation plus full name? Don’t you think that will sound natural and convincing?”

  118. Voshkod
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:26 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#91): Re: a Turkish Prison, that depends; is the prison set in Judge Parker or The Phantom? Or worse, in Crock, which might recall vague shadows from T.E. Lawrence’s experiences . . . .

    So I’ll play it safe and say no.

  119. Peanut Gallery
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:30 am [Reply]

    @Braniff (#23): Or I guess it could be a distress call from a cockney fellow seated behind them.

  120. Indichik
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:34 am [Reply]

    Pluggers: Is this a real thing? Is anyone here old enough or otherwise informed enough to tell me whether older people get invitations advertising their “last” class reunions? Because that’s…that’s just sad. But then, that’s Pluggers.

  121. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:36 am [Reply]

  122. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:43 am [Reply]

    @Indichik (#120): Are they saying the letter is late and they missed the last (most recently past) one?

  123. Calico
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:44 am [Reply]

    @Liam (#13):
    MW – Riders on the Storm…
    Also, Mary sure likes hitting on younger women, doesn’t she?

  124. Quantum Mechanic
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:44 am [Reply]

    @Voshkod (#30):

    Actually, Hawaiian Airlines still serves hot food in coach for flights between the US mainland and the islands.

  125. bats :[
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:47 am [Reply]

  126. jim, some guy in iowa
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:48 am [Reply]

    @Indichik (#120): yeah, I’ve seen that in the local papers from time to time – especially in the smaller towns that might have only had 10 or 15 in a graduating class to begin with, you get down to 2 or 3 who aren’t in good health… yeah, it is sad

  127. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    Mutts: A far more likely scenario (special delivery for Lumaca Morente and Nehemiah Scudder).

  128. Voshkod
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    @Quantum Mechanic (#124): I was on their planes intra-island a few weeks ago and saw that, to my amazment. Sadly, I was flying back to CONUS on United.

    But let’s face it; H&J are not going to Hawaii. They’d go, instead, to “that unattached landmass in the opposite cardinal direction.”

  129. Calico
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:49 am [Reply]

    FC – Play me my song…here it comes again…owowowowowow

    Or, this (definitely NSFW or if children are around)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=daE4UshFdgs&list=PL7C24574805D0AAE2

  130. Indichik
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:51 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#122): The phrasing is “You’re really a Plugger if you get a letter…with plans for your last class reunion this fall.” However, yours is a much more generous interpretation than, “This is your LAST class reunion. Because you’re old. And you’ll all be dead shortly.”

  131. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:51 am [Reply]

    @bats :[ (#125): Well, she is a D.V.M., in theory…

  132. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:53 am [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#127): Bwa-HAAAAA you just made my day!

  133. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:54 am [Reply]

    @Indichik (#130): On a more positive note, at least they expect a few of them to live until fall.
    //glass half full, you know.

  134. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:56 am [Reply]

    MW — I’m a nature fanatic. But if anyone ever said to me, “Come then…let us enjoy the BEAUTY this place has to offer!,” I’d start backing up very slowly.

  135. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:58 am [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#131): Doctor of Vocabulary Magnificence?

  136. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:00 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#134): In all fairness, Mary is responding to a woman who just said, “I’d like that, Mary.” As opposed to, “Sure,” “Okay,” or the more likely, “Hell no.”

  137. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:01 am [Reply]

    9CL — Yes, this is indeed the way rural law enforcement works. Next comes the part where they strip down and go at each other while the deputy sheriff operates the camera.

  138. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:01 am [Reply]

  139. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:04 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#137): We can hope that one of them gets his or her head stuck between the bars.

  140. Anonymous
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:05 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#137): Or, as they call it in Hoboken, “Friday afternoon”.

  141. bourbon babe, unbuckled
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:08 am [Reply]

    Curtis: Last we saw Greg, he was lying on his stomach in bed. So what exactly did the kids interrupt? I knew Diane wore the pants in the family; I guess she must wear the strap-on, too.

  142. Morgan Wick
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:11 am [Reply]

    Actually, I seem to recall a few times Herb whined about his wife’s cooking that were featured on this very blog. Maybe Uncle Lumpy was in charge those times.

  143. Indichik
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:12 am [Reply]

    @jim, some guy in iowa (#126): I graduated in a class of 800. It’s hard for me to picture!

    @Lumaca Morente (#133): Okay, maybe the caption should read: You’re a Plugger if you’re just hoping to stay alive for three more months so you can make it to your last class reunion.

  144. My transmogrifier, Cardboard Box
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:14 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#139): 9CL We can hope that one of them gets his or her head stuck between the bars.

    That could get interesting when it comes time for Sveth to drop to his knees to propose – again.

    Actually, he should go for it now that he has a captive audience. With any luck, Fleurry will gnaw both her arms off and slip through the bars in order to escape.

  145. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:15 am [Reply]

    @My transmogrifier, Cardboard Box (#144): Why, thank you for making me snort out loud at my computer with the vivid mental image. Luckily I had not yet begun eating lunch.

  146. Calico
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:16 am [Reply]

    So Herb is an Emerson Lake and Palmer fan?

    Oh, and today’s Zits is mighty cute. *snicker*
    I enjoy both Zits and BBlues.

    Where is brother Chad?

    RM – Free Chef Tito!

    Beetle – as George Takei would say, “Oh, my.”

  147. Gerry
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:17 am [Reply]

    I would like to take this opportunity to say how much I HATE the lettering in Funky Winkerbean. Particularly the L’s and Y’s. That’s all.

  148. Marc
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:18 am [Reply]

    Today’s Mark Trail has has me tripping on Jefferson Airplane all morning.

    One pill makes you larger
    And one pill makes you small
    And the ones that mother gives you
    Don’t do anything at all
    Go ask Alice, when she’s ten feet tall

    And if you go chasing rabbits
    And you know you’re going to fall
    Tell ‘em a hookah smoking caterpillar
    Has given you the call
    To call Alice, when she was just small

    In thi case, replace Alice with Rusty.

  149. Calico
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    @bourbon babe, unbuckled (#141):
    Yes. Yes, I think she does.

  150. terrapin
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:19 am [Reply]

    JP: “I want two boys! So if you shoot me two X chromosomes you’re in big, big trouble, Mister!”

    MT: Quick, little otter! Stick your head in the trap before he catches you!

  151. The Ridger
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:21 am [Reply]

    H&J: Also, which is the green one: the chicken filets, the mashed potatoes, or the mystery dessert (which always comes in a little package of its own when I fly – yes, if your flight is over 5 hours they have to serve a meal, though it’s not free anymore)?

  152. Mibbitmaker
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:22 am [Reply]

    JP: Sex selection abortion it is, then.

    A3G: ….and they’re coming to take him away, ha-ha!

  153. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:27 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#136): Relax, commenter Lumaca Morente, and enjoy all the beauty this strip has to offer!

  154. jim, some guy in iowa
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:28 am [Reply]

    @Indichik (#143): 800? equally hard for me to imagine – that’s over six times what my graduating class was (130-ish) – and now, almost thirty (!) years later, same school district is running right around 100 students/grade

  155. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:28 am [Reply]

    @Anonymous (#140): No, it’s too fancy for Hoboken, too hot for church.

  156. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:29 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#153): *commenter Lumaca Morente staggers off into the desert to die*

  157. Anonymous
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:29 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#155): In Hoboken today, it’s too hot IN church.

  158. jim, some guy in iowa
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:30 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#156): you’re doing a guest appearance in “Crock”?

  159. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:31 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#156): Come, buzzards, and enjoy the bounty of nature!

  160. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:34 am [Reply]

  161. Mibbitmaker
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:34 am [Reply]

    Luann: That last panel sort-of immitates the kaleidoscopic opening of The Lucy Show.

    PCity: Immitation of the Pibgorn troll.

    9CL: Insulting immitation of Sam & Diane.

    MT: Rabbit wishes he could immitate Joel/Mike & the bots.

    Zits: Jerry Scott immitates himself (basically).

  162. bbofun
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:36 am [Reply]

    I know not everybody’s probably seeing this, but (or this butt)- why is there an ad for a company (Leonisa) that makes panties, featuring a rather fetching young lady clad in a t-shirt and the company’s product, turned away from us to show off her pert bottom, in the upper right corner?

    Not complaining, just wondering how we can make this happen more often.

  163. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:37 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#135): Doctor of the Virgin Mary, not to be confused with Edda, who has a doctorate in AAOOOGA Studies.

  164. bbofun
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:37 am [Reply]

    And now she’s gone. *Sad*

  165. TimP
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:39 am [Reply]

    @bbofun (#162): All I’m getting is an ad for ceiling fans. They are, coincidentally I’m sure, “Big Ass Fans”, but that’s not at all the same thing as what you’re talking about…

  166. Anonymous
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:40 am [Reply]

    @bbofun (#164): If she paid Josh more, her picture would show up more often.
    //What, Pibgorn isn’t enough for you?

  167. Matt
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:40 am [Reply]

    I have absolutely no idea who the old people in Funky Winkerbean are this week. Judging by mention of a publisher, I’m assuming it’s Les after another time jump. In the interim, Cayla must have died her skin white in order to better resemble Lisa.

  168. Little Guy
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:40 am [Reply]

  169. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:41 am [Reply]

    @My transmogrifier, Cardboard Box (#144):

    With any luck, Fleurry will gnaw both her arms off and slip through the bars in order to escape.

    I can’t recommend that scenario. We don’t want you-know-who getting the idea that he can produce Crash-style smut comic strips, now do we?

  170. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:41 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#160): A work of art, as the desert and its denizens make a Georgia O’Keefe out of my carcass.

  171. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:42 am [Reply]

    @Little Guy (#168): Richard Jeni has also joined Bert Convy???

  172. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#169): Doesn’t he already do that?

  173. notmydesk
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    FW: “You calling me GAY, woman?! And, after those cupcakes and that half-assed banner, why them panties still on? Let’s get this over with so’s I can fall asleep complaining about the phone bill.”

  174. The Ridger
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:43 am [Reply]

    @pugfuggly (#24): look no further than ‘Look at all the Help Wanted posters everywhere!’. There are plenty around here. Part-time at $6/hour, which won’t let you live in an alley.

  175. DaveyK
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:46 am [Reply]

    “The moment of truth has arrived.” Jeffy thought to himself. “Kill or be killed. I always knew it would happen. Now that it’s here, I’m relieved. So…where’s that switchblade I keep in my pocket for just this occasion?”

  176. Sequitur
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:47 am [Reply]

    @bbofun (#162):

    All I see up there is is a hand holding a large banana with the headline, “5 Foods to Never Eat.”

  177. comcis fan
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:50 am [Reply]

    FW: I haven’t been paying attention to “Funky” lately. Was there another time jump? Is that Les and a time-lapse-lightened Cayla, uttering oh-so-subtle exposition to identify Andy? Or is that fellow not smirking ironically enough to be Les?

  178. Uncle Lumpy
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:53 am [Reply]

    “Cor blimey, Colin — your administrative assistant ‘as cleaned up the loo and fixed the lift!”

    “Yes, ‘e’s an ‘Andy Clark, inna?”

  179. Cloudbuster
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:55 am [Reply]

    @Mibbitmaker (#161): Little ditty, ’bout Sam & Diane, two American kids growin’ up in the heartland. No, wait, that’s not it…

    Sam: You know… you know I always wanted to pop you one? Maybe this is my lucky day, huh?
    Diane: You disgust me. I hate you.
    Sam: Are you turned on as I am?
    Diane: More.

    Yeah … that’s it, exactly.

  180. Odie Odo
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:55 am [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#171): Richard Jeni has also joined Bert Convy???

    …and Allen Ludden. Why does everyone always forget Allen Ludden?

  181. comcis fan
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:57 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#107): Word is she keeps a flask hidden in a tuba. And speaking of drinking, I wonder if Andy Clark is any relation to Helen.

  182. comcis fan
    July 19th, 2013 at 11:58 am [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#179): I saw that episode last night.

  183. tallyHO
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:00 pm [Reply]

    @Lily Sincere (#62):

    I wrote about it weeks/months ago in the comments but I am convinced Billy’s Ghost Avatar of Denial wears a leather jacket and smokes and is named: “Hell Yeah I Did”!

  184. Indichik
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

    @jim, some guy in iowa (#154): It must be in Pluggerville. No one ever moves there OR leaves.

  185. tallyHO
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

    @Odie Odo (#180):

    Richard Jeni.

    That’s a real drag. It makes it worse that this is the first I recall hearing of it.

    He was funny and in a certain league of comedians who together seemed to loosely own a certain approach to stand up comedy. Actually, of people I could think of, he wouldn’t be one who would come to mind as being that bummed out.

    Back to the salt mines….

  186. Joe Blevins
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:19 pm [Reply]

    H&J: So Herb and Jamaal have totally given up on their wives (they’re both married, right?) and are jetting off somewhere together. All I can say is: finally! The weirdest aspect of this strip is that, in moments of crisis, Herb invokes the name of ’70s prog rockers Emerson, Lake and Palmer as a profanity.

  187. Marion Delgado
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:20 pm [Reply]

    http://muttscomics.com/art/images/daily/071913.gif Seriously, what’s next? Marvin watching Spidey waterskiing over a shark while going “Aaaaaay!” ??

  188. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#172): Piercing, poking, prodding, bondage and incineration, but to date, no stump porn. If I am wrong on this LALALA, I CAN’T HEAR YOU.

  189. Sequitur
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

    H&J: Herb and Jamaal are flying to California where they have been invited to a pool party at Charterstone.

    You go “ELP!” now, Herb. Wait until you get of taste of salmon squares and mayo sandwiches.

  190. Plugger Shrug
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:25 pm [Reply]

    @Indichik (#120):

    “Pluggers: Is this a real thing? Is anyone here old enough or otherwise informed enough to tell me whether older people get invitations advertising their “last” class reunions?”

    As perhaps the one self-admitted Plugger ‘mudge, and probably one of the few old enough to experience this (I’ll be 68 in September), I can verify that it’s a real thing. I got an invitation to my 50th high school class reunion a few months ago, with attached comment that it would very likely be the last one.

    Reunion was a couple of weeks ago; I didn’t go (and hadn’t gone to my earlier ones either); as I pointed out to the one classmate with whom I keep in touch, I didn’t much care for that part of my past when I went through it the first time, and didn’t see any point in reliving it.

  191. Sequitur
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:27 pm [Reply]

    @Sequitur (#189):

    “of taste of” is the new “a taste of.” Try it on your coworkers.

  192. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:30 pm [Reply]

    @Cloudbuster (#94): It really seems to me that the Evanses attribute no particular value to perseverance and hard work.

    That would explain much about the quality of the strip, wouldn’t it?

  193. Marion Delgado
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    Hello Publisher Andy Clark!

    Hello Writer Harry Dinkel, writer of the book that I as publisher will publish.

    I assure you, publisher Andy Clark, that I am not inquiring after the safety of your plane flight, on an airplane, nor making any other inquiries after your health and safety that would be an unmanly thing not done by a male human.

    It pleases me to hear that writer Harry Dinkel, as I, as a male human, would not accept you acting in a way that male humans do not act.

    Salutations, publisher Andy Clark

    Salutations, writer Harry Dinkel, and pass on my greetings to your mate. Though, since she is many cycles past her child-bearing years is it still technically correct to refer to her as such?

    Publisher Andy Clark I believe it is. In any event I continue to do so in conversations with other male humans, though the correct term is “spouse.” Furthermore, while childbearing is indeed not possible for actual female humans of her chronological age, mating behavior is still possible, and indeed, we engage in it with the shades partly up so that our neighbors will report it to their acquaintances. Would you like me to leave this telephone off its receiving cradle to ascertain this for yourself?

    Writer Harry Dinkel that would be most instructive. Proceed. and I would request you accept my next telephone call via telephone from the basement of Funky’s Pizzeria, as it is the most secure receiving phone area in your geographical region.

  194. Sequitur
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:32 pm [Reply]

    @Plugger Shrug (#190):

    I don’t attend my high school reunions either since I live over 1200 miles from my old high school and most of my old chums live elsewhere as well or are deceased. I still get the reunion invites (thanks to my snitching sister) and the trend now is to group 3-4 years together such as the classes of ’67 – ’70.

  195. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:33 pm [Reply]

    @Plugger Shrug (#190): Wow, your high school crowd must be a bunch of quitters. Being 68 is not exactly on the brink of death. Unless you live in Funkytown.
    //40th for me next year and I’m not going, either.

  196. Your Publisher Andy Clark
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:37 pm [Reply]

    Yeah, well, I don’t give much of a shit about you, either.

  197. Sequitur
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:39 pm [Reply]

    Bizarro: Don’t let June see that smoke cell phone or she will think it’s a sign that they’re serving waffles.

  198. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#113): The “trick” – such as it is – is longer flights during meal times. If it’s only 2-3 hours, yeah, you’re stuck with the little baggies of snacks. But I’ve certainly had full meals – hot ones, even – if I’m flying between Chicago and the West Coast.

  199. tallyHO
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:47 pm [Reply]

    Now, I know there are those among us, as a species, who are American Civil War buffs. That’s fine. The odds are good those people have more knowledge of war in general than I do about that particular war.

    So, I was reading Blondie just a bit ago. And, it introduced to me the term “picket”. Apparently it was something in the CW. I don’t think it is a good idea to just assume every reader knows what a “picket” did in an army back then.

    Someone once told me never assume people are as smart as you are. Considering I’m pert dumb, I thought my threshold was low but that doesn’t serve me well when reading the stuff of others.

    —-Okay, after a quick lesson via Wikipedia…there were other words that could be used. Sentry, perhaps. Using the phrase “On watch….” or “On guard…” maybe….

    Dang it, Dithers and Dagwoods! Don’t presume your audience went to military school! (gasp!) Unless, their readership is composed of older veterans and…BOING! BONGGGGG! It all makes sense now. The veil has been removed from my eyes.

    No wonder legacy comics strips suck!

    Hey, Mell Lazurus! Just make Momma’s boy Francis as Gay as Gay can be! Step up to the times, to the 1920s, man!

    Beetle Bailey. It’s time. Either buck up and join a war or go home to a ticker tape parade because I swear if you continue on at the pace you are on then you are setting up the ultimate snicker snark parade. Just saying.

  200. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:48 pm [Reply]

    @The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan (#127): That gif, sir, is a thing of beauty.

  201. walt d.
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:49 pm [Reply]

    FW: Guys don’t do that because our wives are already on the phone. Although, truth-be-told, we probably wouldn’t do it anyway.

    FW: So this publisher was at the party? And he/she came from a destination far enough away to require an airplane, but near enough to be back on the ground by late afternoon. Yes, you need to call your publisher. First, he/she went to a lot of trouble to be at a crappy event. Second, that’s your publisher, damn it! You need to be nice to that person.

    FW: Remember when Bull was the only real dickhead in the strip. Apparently he was just a carrier.

    FW, et. al.: Everyone friggin’ writes books. Given a choice, would you prefer to read a book by Alan, Michael, Sarah, Les or Harry? Alan’s would presumably be the most readable, but Sarah’s would be the shortest.

    9CL: This could be a pretty good strip if Brooke would learn to write stories, and then illustrate them, instead of doing that thing he usually does.

    Where is the cartoonist who can both write and draw? And further, why are there so many published strips that do poorly at both?

  202. Your Publisher Andy Clark
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#200): McDonnell gave me all the tools I needed. Well, other than the otters.

  203. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

  204. Uncle Lumpy
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

    Sad fact: Andy Clark co-wrote the musical Funky Winkerbean’s Homecoming, and inflicted the Harry L. Dinkle March upon an innocent world.

  205. The Rt. Venerable Pasdordan
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:55 pm [Reply]

    @Your Publisher Andy Clark (#202): Gaahh!! Must remember to change these things back…

  206. Plugger Shrug
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:55 pm [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#195):

    My grad class had something like 36 people in it, of whom only three or four have since died (Minnesota farm kids are tough), so odds are there would be enough around in another five years to have a 55th reunion (I’d still not attend, though).

    Apparently the old high school was going to be torn down this summer, so this was every one’s last chance to “relive” the “wonderful memories” associated with the dump, er, edifice. Maybe that meant the 50th was so obvious a pinnacle of nostalgia that any future reunions would be anticlimactic.

    I’ll admit that, ten years ago in a weak moment, I decided to drive up to my home town (200 miles north of the Twin Cities) to take in the unstructured last day (Sunday) of my 40th reunion. Fortunately when I got there I discovered that I apparently had the wrong directions for the beach where it was to be held, and after a lot of driving around randomly I never did find the group (the only phone numbers I had were to landlines of people who had gone to the reunion, so trying to call for updated directions was not productive). So I drove home, more amused and relieved than anything. And have not been tempted since.

  207. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 12:57 pm [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#204): And I thought you were just being amusing.

  208. Esther Blodgett
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:01 pm [Reply]

    @jim, some guy in iowa (#154): So I suppose my graduating glass of 1200+ would probably blow your mind, huh?

  209. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:06 pm [Reply]

    @Plugger Shrug (#206): My graduating class had more than eight hundred students. I went to the tenth anniversary gathering because I happened to be in town visiting my parents, and my only vivid memory (which I hope is wrong, but I wasn’t drinking) is that one of the organizers grabbed the mike at some point in the evening and told us very loudly and angrily that we were a bunch of ungrateful a-holes and that she was very sorry she’d been an organizer and would never ever do it again. I’ve never received any notice of any other class gathering. So be it. I’m glad most high schools are smaller now.

  210. lynn
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#198): Well, I recently flew from the East to West coast three times in pursuit of my – um – ‘hobby’ (see pasdordan’s comment at #77), all at mealtimes, and I can tell you that US Airways does not offer a ‘hot meal’. Nor even a complimentary bag of pretzels. But I was far too excited to eat and had ingested some scraps while gnawing off my ankle monitor.

  211. Plugger Shrug
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

    @Esther Blodgett (#208):

    You put 1200 high school seniors in one glass, and it’s gonna get pretty crowded in there. Stinky, too. Wouldn’t it have been kinder to put them in an auditorium or something?

  212. hogenmogen
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

    Funky: Label me as uncaring, but if someone’s plane crashed, I’d hear about it on the news before I was able to get an answer on a cell phone that has been crushed to bits along with its owner.

  213. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:09 pm [Reply]

    @comcis fan (#181): Ooh, wouldn’t that be interesting…

  214. Plugger Shrug
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

    @Esther Blodgett (#208):

    “So I suppose my graduating (c)lass of 1200+ would probably blow your mind, huh?”

    I actually have a (custom-ordered) tee shirt which reads:

    YOU BLOW MY MIND!!
    (and I’ll suck yours!)

    ////What, just because I’m a Plugger I can’t be crude and vulgar?

    ////////I’ll admit I haven’t dared to wear it anyplace for the last thirty years or so, and not only because I can no longer fit into it. But I have my memories.

  215. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

    @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (#198): Ah, of course! On one hand, I’d get something to eat. On the other hand, I’d probably have to use the airplane loo and I’m still recovering from last time. There’s always a catch.

  216. Poteet
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

    @Plugger Shrug (#214): Ah, crude ‘n vulgar tee shirt confessions! I still have one that I bought in Nebraska that says “I Love Big Cocks” with an illustration of a male pheasant. I never did wear it except around the house.

  217. Peanut Gallery
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

    JP – He was waiting for just the right moment to discuss it.

  218. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    @walt d. (#201): Where is the cartoonist who can both write and draw?

    I think it’s not coincidence that a lot of the better strips are created by writer-artist teams, rather than individuals. It’s about knowing one’s own strengths, and being honest enough to accept help for the weak areas.

  219. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:19 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#216): I take it that Mr. Poteet was not intimidated.

  220. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:20 pm [Reply]

    @lynn (#210): Ah, US Airways. That explains it. If we can, we fly Alaska. United and Delta are also tolerable.

  221. Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:23 pm [Reply]

    @Poteet (#215): Heh, yeah. My challenge is trying to figure out how to time my visit so that it’s not at the time everyone else in the plane suddenly realizes they need to pee.

    How one knows one has become an adult: you remember to bring your own sweater; you genuinely like getting socks for Christmas; and you prefer aisle seats to window ones on airplanes.

  222. Chip Whittle
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:30 pm [Reply]

    @queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#18):

    tired of all the squee being dogs and cats? Well then, have a ikkle coati.

    Dear Queek:

    Enclosed please find my subscription for two dozen baby coati. Thank you.

    C. Whittle.

  223. Alter Ego
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

  224. Northern lurker
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

    JP: my partner for life an I have gone on a cruise and found the average passenger might have inner beauty but they have more of a fat German or French Canadian in a Speedo vibe than a typical Barreto rackannalia vibe.

  225. exapno
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:44 pm [Reply]

    Retail: Looks like Cooper might be wanting to set up JOSH, as oppsed to vice versa…Feuti has said there are going to be some changes. I can see where Stuart could get into trouble for hiding from Marla the stockroom supervisor position. Could Stuart end up working for Marla?? LOVE to see that…

  226. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

    @Northern lurker (#224): Ah, if they had *inner* beauty, then you were in Luann, not JP.

  227. exapno
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:48 pm [Reply]

    @exapno (#225): and will I ever learn to close tags??

  228. Peanut Gallery
    July 19th, 2013 at 1:51 pm [Reply]

  229. Odie Odo
    July 19th, 2013 at 2:00 pm [Reply]

    @Joe Blevins (#186): Only Herb is married to an actual human(?) woman. Jamaal is married to his career as the living mascot for CIALIS®… Peter Penis.

  230. thegatwickview
    July 19th, 2013 at 2:18 pm [Reply]

    FW – I wonder if the characters ever feel shame reciting the words TB puts in their mouths? Maybe that’s why the lead character drinks so much, others commit rape, and every body else feels a sense of foreboding. I’m thinking that this comic strip is an ongoing Stephen King experiment in madness.

  231. Liam
    July 19th, 2013 at 2:34 pm [Reply]

    MW-”Let us enjoy the beauty of the solid orange backgrounds.”

    Spiderman-That wasn’t the Tarantula that was the Cockroach.

    JP-”I want two boys and I shall have two boys even if I have to perform a sex change operation on them.”

    RMMD-Is he laying face down in his vomit?

  232. Lily Sincere
    July 19th, 2013 at 2:39 pm [Reply]

    @tallyHO (#183):

    And Dolly’s Ghost Avatar of Spite wears a jacket that reads “Billy Did It and You Can’t Prove Otherwise.” She probably smokes, too.

  233. KreatureFeatures
    July 19th, 2013 at 2:48 pm [Reply]

    @Uncle Lumpy (#204): You can see Batuik’s attempt at rendering the real-life Andy Clark in Sunday’s Funky Winkerbean. He is standing behind Harry Dinkle.

  234. Jim in Wisc.
    July 19th, 2013 at 3:06 pm [Reply]

    @exapno (#225):

    I can see where Stuart could get into trouble for hiding from Marla the stockroom supervisor position.

    Especially since the woman who is Stuart’s immediate superior (whose name escapes me) likes Marla. In fact, Stuart wanted to give Josh his old job as store manager, until this character basically forced Stuart to give the position to Marla.

  235. Old Folkie
    July 19th, 2013 at 3:20 pm [Reply]

    @Lumaca Morente (#195): My 50th was last year and I didn’t go either!

  236. Lumaca Morente
    July 19th, 2013 at 3:23 pm [Reply]

    @Old Folkie (#235): Ha! We sure showed them, didn’t we!

  237. tallyHO
    July 19th, 2013 at 4:49 pm [Reply]

    @KreatureFeatures (#233):

    I knew that was intended to flatter someone but other than considering Stan Freberg, I couldn’t think of who he looked like. And, to be quite honest, I’m unsure who’d be flattered by being in FW. It seems like a symbolic death sentence.

    Sort of like the following.
    Now that you’ve been included in our strip you will die soon but not before the high drama kicks in right about….now!

  238. Artist formerly known as Ben
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:54 pm [Reply]

    FC: “But I digress. Pay up or I’ll break both your kneecaps with this baby.”

    FW: I’ve never heard of this Andy Clark guy. It doesn’t seem like I care about him any less than Harry does. BTW Harry, guys can “do that” and still keep some distance, if needed, by making up another reason to call.

  239. Artist formerly known as Ben
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:54 pm [Reply]

    MT: “(Oh crap, he found me.) Um, no there’s no Oscar here. Welp, gotta go.”

    MW: “Let us scissor… ah, see the Sapphic delights… I mean, natural wonders of this vaginal desert landscape.”

    WofI: And you need a paid professional to do this because?

    9CL: Wait, did he turn her in so they could have conjugal visits? Looks like muscles is stealing dating moves from the George Costanza playbook.

  240. Artist formerly known as Ben
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:55 pm [Reply]

    BC: Uh, these guys don’t look thirsty for beer. They look like they’ve already had a couple and now they want to get it on with Thor.

    JP: Tremendous. They can luck into judgeships in two different counties.

    BB: BLATANT!

    Shoe: That’s considerably lamer than any of the puns that Stephan Pastis’ own characters rag him for.

  241. Artist formerly known as Ben
    July 19th, 2013 at 8:56 pm [Reply]

    Luann: Yeah, it looks like if Evans had any thoughts about humanizing Tiffany he forgot them the next time he cleared his throat.

    SFx: No Charlie, put down that bag of cement. That’s not what you do with it. Bad, bad!

    Marvin: That explains all the plush animals Edward Snowden has been buying lately.

    A3G: Lu Ann: We can sit quietly or we can talk.
    Cole: Gee, I was hoping there was a third choice.

  242. Sgt. Stoned
    July 19th, 2013 at 10:11 pm [Reply]

    FW: Hells bells, woman, if the plane crashes it’ll be on the news!

    MT: Poor Rusty. He still hasn’t been told that otters don’t speak English.

  243. Aviatrix
    July 20th, 2013 at 5:43 am [Reply]

    @Poteet (#216):

    Mine was from New Orleans and said, “Suck the Head,” with a picture of a crayfish.

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