Hagar the Horrible, 1/3/06
So, I’ve been doing the married thing for about four months now, and I have to say that it’s been pretty awesome so far. Still, if the comics are to be believed, all I have to look forward to is my soul dying in tiny increments. Today’s glimpse into the essential deadness of the The Horribles’ marriage is nothing new — we’ve already seen Hagar so desperate for affection that he’s trying to pick up zombie chicks — but there’s something poignant in the second panel here: the look of desperation in Helga’s eyes as she realizes that she’s wasted her life on a slob, Honi’s stunned expression as the epiphany that her parents’ marriage is a sham (how could I not have known? she must think) hits her full-force, and the fortune teller’s total panic as she realizes that her charlatan’s platitudes have hit far deeper than she ever intended.
Cathy, meanwhile, seems to have gone even further off the reservation, as Irving progresses from wide-eyed shock to full-on horror that the woman he married (after what you may recall was a wholly spite-motivated proposal) has turned out to be totally insane. If Cathy takes an abrupt, all-out turn for the emotionally devastating, with Irving’s attempts at procuring a quick annulment leading to recriminations, legal suits and countersuits, and the eventual total public emotional meltdown on the part of both spouses’ mothers, then I for one will be happy guy. Still and all, Irving, Cathy may be an obsessive-compulsive overspender, but she’s managing to sleep happily despite the fact that she’s married a guy who’s such a tool that he wears his damn polo shirts to bed.