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Ha ha, remember last week, when you woke up bright and early every day with Uncle Lumpy’s comedy stylings? Well, you’re with me now, and you’ll take posts at random times and you’ll like it.

Mary Worth, 9/28/10

Oh … oh God. Without even the benefit of a Charterstone pool party to cleanse the palate, Mary has moved on from matchmaking to start her most ambitious meddle yet: the Mother of the Bride Meddle. Sure, she isn’t technically Adrian’s mother, or even her stepmother, but she’s served as Jeff’s platonic yet monogamous consort ever since she killed his wife in ritual combat, so she’s the closest thing Adrian’s got. Mary’s passive-aggressive commentary on the inadequacies of the dress, DJ, floral arrangements, wedding invitation fonts/paper stock, and attendants that Adrian has selected will be delicious. If we’re really lucky, she’ll insist that they make it a double wedding with her new favorite couple, the now merged into wholeness Mike and Jenna.

Mark Trail, 9/28/10

“Wait, did I say ‘cagey,’ as in ‘reluctant to give information due to caution or suspicion?’ Ha ha, that makes no sense. I mean ‘caged,’ because I’ve transformed my property into a giant cage by means of miles of chain-link fence. Not that this cage-hunting business won’t be exciting and challenging! Do you gentlemen smell something gubernatorial in here? I think you’ll find that it’s me!”

Apartment 3-G, 9/28/10

Oh, look, Lu Ann is still acting like a sullen teenager over her hair. Yep, haven’t missed much!