Soap opera? Wrong, an opera has high stakes
Post Content
Rhymes With Orange, 10/19/26
Ha ha, wouldn’t it be funny if a tortoise made glasses out of his own shell, and tried to sell them from a little stand at the side of the road, while he was dying, literally dying, because a tortoise’s shell isn’t just a container or an outfit, it’s a part of his skeleton and he can’t survive without it? It’s marginally funnier than if a happy beshellèd tortoise was selling the glasses and there was a pile of shucked and mangled tortoise corpses behind him, I guess.
Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/19/26
It’s really funny that Rex Morgan, M.D., used to be a strip where the main characters got free stuff all the time and now it’s the strip that teaches you to manage your expectations that anything might change your life for the better in a truly significant way. Like, did your book (you can’t make enough from selling books to live off of anymore,FYI) get optioned by Hollywood? Great! Almost nothing that gets optioned ever gets made, by the way. The realistic best case scenario is that every other year some low-ranking executive at whatever conglomerated streaming service inherited the option rights from its predecessor companies realizes that the option is about to lapse, and instead of trying to figure out if anyone is actually developing something based on your IP, they just renew the option and send you another four-digit check. That’s a nice little bit of change, if you’ve still got a regular job, which you hopefully do! Use it to take your girlfriend out for Thai food and stick the rest in your 401k, that’s my advice!
Judge Parker, 10/19/26
Once again there was Neddy-Charlotte-April drama arising from April’s inability to attend to parental duties after being whisked off by the CIA for interrogation, and there was a lot of hurt feelings that were papered over by apologies that were not accompanied by explanations. This could go on forever, so Charlotte is taking matters into her own hands by joining, or possibly founding, a leftist paramilitary gang. Take that, mother!
17 replies to “Soap opera? Wrong, an opera has high stakes”
Rhymes with Orange:
“He’s a shell of his former self!”
JP: Is “A few weeks later” the new ‘Aaaaaaaaand so…’?
MW: “My dear friends… you better be thanking me profusely in the next two minutes or this place is going to look like the ending of ‘Carrie’!”
GT: “Mrs. Jones, take it easy… unless you want to spend eternity in the cornfield!”
Luann: Uh-oh! I sense some wacky hi-jinx coming!
RMMD:
“Using a fork instead of chopsticks, Augie? — since Thai restaurants typically don’t use chopsticks, that’s using your noodle!”
RMMD:
“Ready for your 85th precipitous change of location in the last 5 years of these story arcs, Charlotte?”
JP. I don’t know where you’re going Charlotte, but you’d better move fast. The exterior of that house is cracking like an eggshell! Get out now!!
Augie, you are way too happy about having the opportunity to explain something to your girlfriend.
Rhymes with Orange:
“Ted’s a different guy since he joined that nudist colony, isn’t he?”
Pluggers: Put Andy on a diet, Sheila. That’s where your food bill is going.
FC: By the way, what do they mean by streetwalker?
JP: So if I’m following (and assuming there’s something here to follow), April and Charlotte were tearfully reunited, but now it’s a few weeks later and Neddy is still taking care of Charlotte? Unless the colorist messed up the hair and that’s really April.
BB: I’m hearing an echo of ‘Ozymandias’ in my head, but it’s not really interesting enough to develop it.
MW: Isn’t anything going to be done about Nelly? The woman has the malevolent charisma of a born cult leader. And, as is painfully plain to see, Charterstonians are pitifully malleable.
H&L: Around fifteen years ago, one of our County Commisioners was on trial for corruption. While scrolling the local news one night, I landed on a channel that was re-capping the day’s court proceedings with puppets. I honestly thought I was hallucinating.
Zits: If only Jeremy had some type of electronic device to organize his World Civilization notes and maps! (Seriously, do high school teachers still hand out mimeographed maps and notes?)
FC: Thel spent the night standing out on the corner in front of the local taproom.
JP: And Charlotte somehow continues to be the most mature character in the strip, and not just because she occasionally talks like a thirty-year-old.
RMMD: Because Augie knows this is Rex Morgan, where nothing interesting happens ever, so why bother getting excited about it?
RMMD: Here’s a fun game. Count how many comics have done plots about characters getting film deals. Now count how many actual comics have got film deals. Sorry to dash your dreams, Rex Morgans and Funky Winkerbeans of the world, all your “The Secret” manifesting has been for nothing. Get Garfield-famous, then we’ll talk.
@MKay: My prediction yesterday was that someone at the party (Wilbur, it will be Wilbur) will blurt out “We thought Ian and Mary were having an affair! Haw-haw!” That will lead the story back to Nelly.
Although I only gave that a 50/50 chance; it’s just as likely this week will be devoted to the narration box, and everyone else, praising Mary for successfully managing the complex task of organizing a surprise party.
@lynn: Can confirm high school students do still get paper handouts and assignments, though to a lesser degree than the pre-Information Age generations. And they still have a tendency to just stuff them in their backpack and leave them there until the summer, when they’re excavated like scholastic archeological relics.