Wednesday first one-liners of 2013 one-liners
Post Content
Archie, 1/2/13
This sick burn on Mannequin 2: On The Move and/or soulless corporate control of all media was probably more pointed back when the strip first ran in the early ’90s, when Mannequin 2: On The Move was a recent memory and we hadn’t yet resigned ourselves to soulless corporate control of all media.
Crankshaft, 1/2/13
The sad, love-starved souls in the Funkyverse think that gently resting your back against somebody else’s back qualifies as “cuddling.”
Heathcliff, 1/2/13
Heathcliff’s owner has lost a bet to his cat, and because they’re not allowed to bet for money, he’s now subject to humiliation and physical abuse on his own front lawn.
Shoe, 1/2/13
Biz’s old buddy Zeke is going to die soon.
Ziggy, 1/2/13
Ziggy is sick and tired of working so hard to prevent his animal friends from killing each other.
Marmaduke, 1/2/13
Translation: WWHOORRRR WHOOORRRRORRR HORROR HORROR KILL KILL I WORSHIP THE DEMON BLOOD GOD BELOW